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John Holmberg
All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up North features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe DeRosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here for.
Brady
The amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed, right? Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it, too. And you can get rid of your pain and start saying, yes, I can to all the things you want to do. And. And all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute head there right now. The Core Institute dot com. Ah, there you go. Thank you. Miles to nowhere email from everybody saying things. It's like, man, I don't, you know, talking about weights of women. The way Zachary can't tell how much a woman weighs. He's, it was horrible. And the guy said, I don't like a woman who's skinny, 120 pounder. You can keep her. She looks like she needs 10 hamburgers. I like a curvy girl who's a little bit thick with no cellulite and good skin, like, oh, you're looking for what's called a unicorn. They don't exist. That's a high standard you got out there. It shouldn't matter. I've always said it doesn't matter what a woman weighs unless it's obscene. It doesn't matter. And that's the same thing. It's like women. Women always say size doesn't matter for a guy unless it's too big or too small. So size matters, right? And it's the same thing with a woman. You're just perfect. Yeah, but size matters. If it's too little, it matters. If it's too big. It matters. So then you can't deny the fact that size in fact matters. It has to fall in to a criteria for it, not to. What they should say is your size doesn't matter. You're in the parameters. Same with a woman, though. It matters, but the weight doesn't. Because you can be a like 120 pound and gross. You know, not even too skinny. Like, just sloppy. I can be sloppy and. Or you can be 160 pounds and tight and fit and looks part and 190 pounds and curvy and still like, get it done. Like, I don't think Megan the stallion is, you know, gonna hop on the scale and impress anybody. Like, if you saw it on paper, you'd be like, you know, 5, 11, 205. But you see her inner gear and you're like, whoa, that's insane. So it's not the weight so much, it's just how you carry it. Because you can be gross and 100150020 pounds and you can be spectacularly pretty at 200 pounds. But I mean, you know, you don't want to get too much higher than that. That's pretty heavy.
Brett
Let's not get carried away.
Brady
Yeah, I don't want to. I don't want to. You know, I don't have a stalemate at the Linus scrimmage with someone I'm, I'm with. You know, I don't have to have a blocking battle where it's like, I can't move her and she can't move me. This is. You don't have that. I always just say that about girls who are too tall. Like, I don't like a girl who can block my shot. Like, I don't like to think about posting up on somebody and turning, going, can't get it over. She's too tall. And that's just because I'm six feet. Like if I was six, eight. Yeah, yeah, you had, you had a different animal.
Dylan
Woman would have to. Might have a chance to block him.
Brady
No, everybody can block a shot. You're. You're a child sized man. That's okay. It's all right. It's you. You should have. If you had a. But you would have to eliminate the majority of all people to say that I won't be with somebody taller than me. You know, you're getting rid of 80% of all women. Am I wrong? Why is that?
Brett
When you put it that way? That's not 85%, though.
Brady
He's probably shorter than 85% of the female population?
Dylan
No.
Brady
Well, if you eliminate women over 60 and women under 17, you're probably right on par with most of them. There's a few shorter ones, but for the most part, you're gonna be the exact same size or a little shorter than most. You can't eliminate tall women. Can't do it. You'd be cutting into your own supply. And Brett can't. You know, you can have a rule says, I don't want a woman taller because you'd be 6 5.
Brett
Oh, screw that.
Brady
You have a 6 foot 5 inch woman that would scare the hell out of you. Oh yeah.
Brett
They play for the Mercury.
Brady
Yeah.
Brett
You don't drive a Subaru.
Brady
No, no, it's not a thing. I was. We were at. Man, this overnight thing I'm doing where I'm staying up watching TV late at night. I got a nap in last night, so I was. I didn't go full on through. Is the best thing I've done to myself, my body and my life and ages. It's just amazing. I feel so spry and ready. No alarms waking me. You haven't lived until you haven't been like, you just wake up when you're supposed to.
Dylan
Not a slave to the clock.
Brady
Not a slave to the clock. Not. Not going to bed, forcing sleep, not waking up in the middle of good sleep because I have to just. This is awesome. So I'm enjoying things more. I found that I'm like, I don't look at the clock. I get to bed in five minutes. I don't do that because I hate bedtime. I hate it. Childlike nonsense. And I've been watching that Fear Thy Neighbor a lot on the id. That's back on a little yesterday sitting there. It was the middle of the day. So it was, dude. And they always have the. Here's the thing they do on Fear Thy Neighbor. If you haven't seen it yet, it's. And there's a lot of episodes, which means neighbors kill each other at a pretty consistent clip in this country. That there's neighbor murders due to disputes. So eventually. And they all start off the same. Be careful. One of them's usually like way too excited about Neighbors. And the other guy's a little bit like, yeah, all right, we'll deal with it. And then they get to be friends, but one's a little less wanting to be friends than the other. Then one thing happens and the friendly one is always like, what's going on? Because the other guy finally snaps. Like, that's enough. Stay on your side. Don't come over to my house anymore. That's it. So the one yesterday, they had a lot of property. They always cast for the reenactments. These incredibly good looking actors that are close to like the, like the good looking versions of the real people. And then they interview the real people that are there. And they're always like, well, we was at that thing and then went to. He come by the other day, he had his gun out. And I'm like, okay, that's what we're dealing with. And then you go to the reenactment of like the handsome people. So you start to kind of fall for both sides. This one was the worst I've ever seen. These hillbillies had a dog that evidently the other neighbors claimed hopped into their yard and killed one of their lambs. Ate it.
Dylan
Yeah.
Brady
So, like, I know who did this. It was your dog. So they're like, my dog didn't do it. And that starts the battle. Now they can't be. Now they can't be cordial at all. So they're driving by each other's houses, flipping each other off, you know, screaming at each other, you know, the U sucks and fus and all this stuff. And so one night, it's snowing and windy. They're like, where's Moxie? Where's the dog? Like, oh, gosh. And then you hear. And he's like, what's going on? So it's freezing cold. They run outside, they go looking around for their dog. And that was cast. It's a Canadian show. So the. All the people that are playing the parts of American hillbillies that shoot each other say, what's this all about? And you realize that these Canadians are doing this stuff. I never shot your dog. Eh? What's this all about? And they don't even try to not be Canadian or they don't even try to be hillbillies, which is mostly what's going on. So they go over and the neighbors are just for no reason at all, shoveling a section of their yard of snow. And the guy comes over and he goes, I know what you're doing. And then he's, what is this about? And he says, I know you're covering up where you killed my dog. Like, the guy overreacts immediately and assumes that dude just shot his dog and they've already buried it. You killed my dog. Losing it, I mean, just everybody goes crazy. So a couple. So nobody calls the police, which, first of all, you'd think maybe there'd be a cop. Nope. Three or four months later, there's still the you killed my dog battle going on. The neighbors that are being accused of killing the dog have their dog has a litter of puppies. So while this. While the neighbor, whose dog evidently got shot, leaves with his son to go grab a pizza, he sees that the neighbors have their box of puppies. And, you know, they're outside and he's driving along, and his son's like. And his son played with the neighbor girl. They were, like, friends for. So it was very tense. And the guy's still mad about his dog, and he goes towards their house and sees the box of puppies, Runs the box of puppies over.
Brett
Jesus Christ.
Brady
I know. And then. I know. And then loses his mind again. They go get pizza, they're fine. Nobody calls the police. Comes home and tells the wife I did something bad. It's like, what? I ran over a box of puppies. And she doesn't leave or get mad. They just enjoy the pizza. And I'm like, what is. What in the. Then they go back to the real lady. He came back. He was real sad about having had done that. And I'm like, okay, back to reality, hillbillies. So then the guy stops him on the side of the road a few days later, he says, I know who actually shot your dog. And he goes, I know you shot my dog. I didn't shoot your dog. Guy grabs a gun, won't even hear him out, and goes, somebody hit your dog with a car. And then, to put it out of its misery, shot it and then put it in the back of their truck and drove away because they felt bad. That never happened. He pulls a gun. Guy just grabs a rifle and loads him up. And then I realized that the people that have been talking are the son and the wife of the guy who got killed. They're just on TV now. And then they shot my daddy right in the heart, right there in the road. I was in the car and, you know, didn't have to get like this. And I'm like, I think I love this show more than anything, anything that's ever been on television. Every single day I Look, there's 77 episodes of fear Thy Neighbor. All end in someone dying. All of them. And I bring it up only to say to you, brady, watch yourself.
Brett
Because if anything, Laser all over again.
Brady
Laser's gonna kill you. That's the first thing I thought, is that Laser, who kind of is like, yeah, Brady's fine. Told me once that he doesn't Necessarily, like, going outside because Brady's always there. And like, he joked about it, and I said, do you? And he goes, I'm not. I'm not the type of guy who, you know, necessarily needs the neighborly thing. And I'm laughing because we're at a Suns game, and I'm like, boy, that is. You're going to end up in a big fight. He goes, no, no, it's not that. It's just, you know, I'm less that way than he is. And I'm. Is he always outside? He goes, yeah, he's always outside. We checked before we go outside. And I started laughing. I'm like, this is going to. Now I've seen fear thy neighbor. I think of you, Brady, and I get worried. I get very worried. So just maybe go to Laser in a couple of days and just goes, we're all right. You're not thinking about killing me. Just put it out there. Maybe. Because I think deep down he's got probably some fantasies. Most neighbors would. I have fantasies about killing a few of my neighbors, but we don't really talk. The gays and I are the only ones that really have an acquaintance. And that could go sideways. I can't imagine my neighbors wanting to kill me or running over puppies. But when you run over a box of puppies, I think your wife should leave.
Dylan
That takes it to the next level. John. I'm sorry.
Brady
Oh, no, no. Yeah. I think if you run over a.
Dylan
Buck, do that and then just go. We'll just go back and finish the p. Pizza.
Brady
You can't keep eating pizza if you've.
Dylan
In today, let alone your wife's like, oh, well, they deserve it.
Brady
Where's the pie? She didn't say they deserve it.
Dylan
I know, but very upset.
Brady
She was very upset, but didn't really react to anything. That was it. She just let him know, you shouldn't have done that. Anyway, where's the pep mush? I'm going in for my next slice. And then they just watch TV and you run over a box of puppies. You're the devil. The box of puppies episode will make you. Make you break. Yeah.
Brett
You're not selling me on the show just from that episode alone.
Brady
It makes you furious. Yeah, but you gotta watch this thing. Oh, the. When veterans move in next door to people who want to be friendly. And two things veterans can't stand. Little extra noise and that doorbell, like, he has some ptsd. And this lady. And the husband's like, we're gonna win him over. Like he does not want to be won over. Ding dong goo. He's screaming. He's like, back in Nam, he's running around nuts. He's shooting. Charlie's at the door and they're like, what's going on? We just said, I don't need you people here. Well, you're just rude. Like, no, technically, you're the rude one. He's told you to leave him alone and you won't. Oh, what a show. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com College hoops.
Dick Toledo
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Unknown
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Dylan
Speaking of ding dong, it was on Saturday morning. Kirby and Ronnie Kirby. Let's see who answered it first. I think Kirby answered the door first. I stayed at the table. She went over there.
Brady
Doorbell rang, someone at the door. I go, oh, ignore it. All right.
Dylan
Don't they dropping off a package or. So she went over there, answered it. I can hear some talking going on. Then Ronnie comes around the corner and they're all two. Or it's three to four people at your door. Two at the door. And Ronnie and Kirby, right? It's all women. They're talking about something. I go, oh, it sounds terrible.
Brady
Yeah, it just sounds like that's the worst Jehovah witness. And you answered the door and slammed the door.
Dylan
Kirby did Right.
Brady
That's it.
Brett
You saw the beginning of Friday, right? Good morning, sir.
Dylan
I don't think Kirby ever. That's her first experience.
Brady
Yeah. And then her first one. She should have taught her. That's a good move.
Dylan
And Ronnie was like, they. You know, they. They probably talked for two minutes. Whatever.
Brady
That's way too long.
Brett
She was very nice.
Brady
Yeah. Answering the door is a bad idea in the first place. But then when there's. Hi. We'd like to talk to you a little bit about the lord. Yeah.
Brett
But on top of that, you have cameras at your house. You should be able to see who's at the door. Why would you answer it?
Dylan
Because she. I don't think Kirby has it on her phone.
Brady
Okay. And she's been trained by Brady that new friends might be on the other side of that door.
Brett
Screw that.
Brady
Never answer the door unless somebody texts first.
Brett
Even if I look at my camera and I know you, I'm like, did you call ahead?
Brady
Right? Yeah. You can't. You got to text ahead. I don't. I don't have your delivery ready for.
Brett
You if your reservations are not made.
Brady
Pal. That. This. This is the worst noise in the world.
Dylan
I always forget about that, though. You can.
Brett
Like.
Dylan
I get up. I got on my phone. Yeah.
Brett
What do you want? Good morning, sir.
Brady
Yeah. You can talk to him through the ring.
Dylan
We ain't talking to nobody.
Brady
That's exactly right. That's better. You seem to say it like it's a bad thing. You make it a bad character. You're the good guy. The person on the other side.
Dylan
What you're here for.
Brady
Yeah. Somebody ringing the doorbell. Is that. You're the person on the other side going, you're at my door. Yeah, we'd like to talk to you. I don't know. You go away. That's it. You're not the jerk. They're the jerks. Nobody rings the doorbell in this day and age. Nobody.
Dylan
You sure are purdy. Give me a minute and I'll be at the door.
Brady
It's only Jehovah's witnesses, religious weirdos and nut bags that'll bang on your door right now. That's it. There's no other person that's coming to your house with any good things at all. It's all bad. On the other side of that door. If you didn't.
Brett
Because Amazon leaves their stuff.
Brady
Amazon drop that doordash all the food.
Dylan
Places like a text just dropped it off. Or an email.
Brady
Yeah, yeah. Right. You don't need to answer ever. Train. Kirby better there's another thing that's going around. Megan got this on her emails, and she goes, did you get the thing about the. Somebody has access to the phone, huh? Email says that here's where you live, gives the address, here's your name, here's your phone number, which obviously they would. Here's. Here's what we know. I have access to your telephone through the camera, and I happen to know. You know that you've. You know, you. You went to a website that got me access to your camera so I can watch you, and I've watched you pleasure yourself, and I have tons of videos of you and the. You know, this, that, and the other. Because I can turn your phone on at any time. She's all nervous about it, and I'm like, did you get it? And I'm like, I'll send them videos if they want. I haven't. I don't give it to anybody who wants to watch me do that. It's their own funeral. That's one of the grossest things you can ever look at is me beating off or something. Okay, you think you're gonna blackmail me with that? I'll send it to the people. Give me the list. I'll beat you the. Beat you to it. We'll send it to your mom. Like, it's going to be weird, but okay. Let's see how she reacts. Hey, mom, just heads up. You might get a video of me beating off. Somebody's in my phone. Oh, my God. Right? Just don't open it. And anybody else out there that gets that, okay? I've gone how many times, Brett? You probably have it as much as I do. Where? In the middle of your video, you look and it says your phone's been infiltrated by.
Brett
Oh, yeah, all the time.
Brady
Just X out of that, right? That could mean that there's some pervert watching me watch somebody else, and he's whacking off to me. All right. That makes you nuts.
Brett
Enjoy.
Brady
Yeah, well, I don't want that to go to my parents. Well, nothing I can do about it. You're the one going to the dirty websites. So I should get a new phone? No. Come on. They know where we live. That's easy, right? You guys? Not interested. Like, if he's peeking in windows, you got something. He's just looking at you through the phone. Give him a wave or a wink every once in a while. Hi, Dylan. My lady button tingles. Just say some stuff. Or better still, if there is somebody who's actually got this, next time you Take a dump. Film it. Or just at least hold your phone down there. You don't even realize he's got access to the camera. Like, oh, she's going to the bathroom. I take a shower. Film a dump.
Brett
Enjoy.
Brady
Enjoy this weirdo. You want to watch me check it out? I have no fear of that at all, if that. But that's a scam. That's. I mean, you look on Reddit and stuff, and evidently it's a big scam. And, like, there are guys who can do that.
Brett
And what do they want you to do? Like, click a link or something or what's.
Brady
Have you ever watched the show Black Mirror? It's a thing that says, I know what you do.
Brett
Okay.
Brady
Right? And this kid's like, oh, I shouldn't be doing this. And I've seen you do it now. You don't know. In the episode of Black Mirror, they think you think that it's just this kid got caught whacking off, and he's 16 and he's embarrassed, right? So he's like, if you don't do this next project for me, I'll tell your parents and. And people what you're doing. And he's freaking out. So the project, he gets into a mix with another guy who's in the scam, who turns out that he's been. He's either, like, having an affair with somebody at his work, and they're like, we know what you're doing, and we're gonna. We're gonna tell your wife, and if you don't, you know, go rob this bank, right? So they make them do these chores. They're not doing that with this. But it turns out the kid was watching Underage, like, really Young Girls. That's what he was beaten off to. So that's why he was extra afraid. And the guy having the affair was like, he was a terrible human being. What a murder in his history. And he was worried that they knew that. So it was for people who have dark secrets. The minor, like, I can see you thing got their secrets going. Like, oh, no one can know my deal. If you're not doing horrible stuff, you're just whacking off. Yeah. This guy Alex says, I got that same email, and I emailed them back and said, if you want more content, I'll gladly jerk it to you. If you just call me, I'll do the same. I have no problem. Like, if you want to scam me and it's about jerk videos, cool. I'll tell you what time. And I'll give you 20 minute heads up. Thinking about maybe running in there and rubbing one out in the middle of the day. Get a good nap if you want.
Brett
I'll give me 20.
Brady
I'll. Do you want me to set up cameras? Do you want this to be. I'll put those meta glasses I have on and you can see what I see.
Brett
And if you're interesting and all that.
Brady
Yeah, I'll ring, light it. That's the, like, look, I want to look nice. I didn't know anyone was watching. I didn't know my ratings had gone up. Your performance now does not bother me at all. But so people are. This is a big scam. So Reddit basically says, if you're getting this, it's basically so you respond. So when you respond to them, it opens up things and they can get accounts and things that they're not interested in watching you beat off. They're interested in you interacting.
Brett
Money.
Brady
Right. So don't click on the link and don't do any of that stuff. But it is kind of like a. It does prey on people's, you know, personal boundaries, and I get that, but again, I'm not. Look, if you're thinking about that scam and you're about to email me, don't. It's. It's. It's fruitless. I will. I'll do things to my body for you that you have no idea. Just for laughs. Just because it's like, this dude's gonna. He thinks he's gonna send it to my Uncle Doug. Uncle Doug will laugh like everybody. You're gonna try to blackmail me with. Hilarious. We'll send it to your wife. I'm like, she's seen it. It's gross. She knows it's disgusting. What about your dad? Probably remind him of his. The good old days. Like, this is basically built the same as him. So he's gonna look down and go, yeah, it's pretty equal to what I. It's almost like me doing it. Chip off the old block. That's my boy. No issues with that. I don't know who you could send me beaten off to that would make me go, oh, I gotta stop this. I can't even. I don't. I have no clue. Even, like, if it was to Brady, I'd be like, yeah, guess what? You better give those guys some money. I'm like, nope, I think you're gonna get a bunch of videos. They send it every time you tug. I'm like, sorry, there's nothing I can do. I can't help that. But yeah. So if you're getting those, they're actually. Evidently they're going. And they go right to your regular email. They're not even in spam. It's like, right in your emails. And it is kind of a threatening letter. Remember that one that was going around a long time ago, said, send me a certain amount of money because I know what you're doing. It wasn't specific. I know what you're doing. I'm going to tell everyone that this affects if you don't send me a certain amount of money. And there was a picture for the Padres that got it. I got it. There was a bunch of people who got this thing and they wanted 10,000 from me, and they wanted like 140 from the guy for the Padres because his salary's a little better. And then a few other people and he posted it on some Instagram thing and said, anybody else? And it was the exact same letter. But it preys on somebody's like, if you're up to no good, you're like.
Dylan
Oh, out of 100 people you send.
Brady
It to, whatever, who are like, they know somebody knows my dark secrets and they might fire off a check or be like, please don't tell anybody this ruin me or I'll lose my job. Or, we know what you're doing. Like, they don't really get specific unless somebody emails you and specifically says, here's what you're doing.
Dylan
Their name.
Brady
Yeah, you are doing this with this person. And I saw you on this occasion, and I now know. And it's blackmail. And you can take it to the cops. They did the Letterman, and Letterman took it to the police. And he had some explaining to do with the people around him, but he's like, I'm not getting extorted for money over this. This is bad. But again. And I'll even open it up on emails. If you guys want a video of me beating off, you want to, you know, Alex or Alan and Ben and all the people that email on the. Rick, if you guys want anything, David.
Brett
Vasquez probably wants one.
Brady
Let's not. Okay, Vasquez, I'll go. Don't bother me with your scam email. Just ask me. Just. Just have the decency to go, John, I've been thinking about this. I'd like to. I'd like to watch a beat off. Like, all right, I can do that if you want to. It ain't pretty if you make it all the way through to the end. It's almost like it's like the ring. Like the video of the ring. You're gonna end up dead at the end, just like Jesus. It killed me. I have no problem with it, Brady. Don't worry about it.
Dylan
I want the homburg rose bad.
Brady
Would you worry about that? Like, if that hit your emails. No, I know, boy. Like, they, like, send it to your mom or. And tell you what. What site you were looking at.
Dylan
I wouldn't be real excited.
Brady
No, it's not like something pumped about. But I don't think I'm.
Dylan
If it was, you know, like that was happening to some people that were, you know, that got their phones hacked or just like, you know, the celebrities that went through the fappening or whatever that was.
Brady
Right. News story, by the way. Everybody's phone's hacked. There's nobody who your phone is. Nobody is not hacked. Like, you can get bounced anytime you want. It's just a matter of what they're getting and when and if you're important enough to get it. Everybody gets their phone porn. Yeah, everybody checks out. Weird.
Dylan
Say that even about your monitor back in the day.
Brady
Yeah. Put a little piece of tape over the camera because they can watch. You still have a sticky post. It still do that? Absolutely. Because you never know. But, I mean, think about the things you're seeing. It's not always. It's very rarely a, you know, walking through the kitchen, farting and being weird and picking your nose and God knows what's going on in everybody's houses. And if there's some guy just sitting there watching that, more power to him. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness.
Brett
We've seen that thing years ago where people have those ring or blink cameras in their house. And then people would hack that and start talking to them, and that's freaking them out.
Brady
And that's just to be scary. Yeah, I can see you. Like, I don't like this at all. I'd turn that off.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady
Do I want someone watching me? No. But if they're gonna, you know, try to blackmail me with it, I'm putting on a show. There's no money. I'm gonna have a thumb in my butt. There's gonna be all sorts of weird stuff. I'm gonna. Yeah, you're gonna get some videos and then send that to my mouth. Hilarious. This guy just sent me. Mark just sent me a picture. He goes, I don't know why they want to see this. And it's just a picture of what his phone would see right now, which is just up his nostrils. Yeah, go ahead. I mean the odds of you hitting the jackpot of me beating off or. You gotta watch all day just in case I do. It's not consistent times.
Dylan
Johnnycam.
Brady
Yeah. And so when you see that I've been. I don't know if an alert goes off on their phone when I've gone over to, you know, see what Madison Ivy's up to on pornhub. Kind of like her, she's fun to watch. If I see Madison Ivan, he's like, okay, he's on the site. Let's go get everybody. That's what. All right, you're about to watch a very pasty middle aged man masturbate, if that's what you're into and you think that that's going to get you some money. I think you should get a job over at Chick Fil A because you're going to do better.
Brett
Vasquez says we can beat together. I'll record you while you record me. No homo, bro.
Brady
No homo. We're not doing it for each other just to see, you know, it's like we're watching game film techniques, man. Yeah. I don't understand, but if you want to watch to the phone, go ahead. It's the weirdest. Like we're in such a situation now where it's almost. That's almost the thing that I don't even know if you should be ashamed of it anymore. We're so. It used to be when people acted like they didn't do it or it was a thing that was taboo. Now it's just like breathing. Yeah, everybody does it. So is it private? Sure. But if you happen to see me doing it, I don't really mind that I'm not gonna do it at the restaurant. I'm gonna keep it in. You know, it's like peeing. Not you just don't do it anywhere.
Dylan
Embarrassing. A little.
Brady
Is it?
Dylan
Yeah, a little bit.
Brady
Depends on what you're up to. Like embarrassing to the point of, you know, it depends on where.
Dylan
It depends on the performance or what's going on.
Brady
I guess like your embarrassment, the time you got caught was with the towels over the edge of the couch or the paper towels. Yeah, hilarious. Embarrassing for a second, but it's like, yeah, I was about to do that. What are you gonna do?
Brett
It happens.
Brady
It happens. You get caught whacking. It's funny. It's embarrassing because you want a private moment. And when that private moment is exposed by somebody in the Room? Sure. That's a little different because you're kind of impeding on their world. Really?
Dylan
Yeah. You've crossed over.
Brady
But if you're in a bedroom, the doors locked, as a decent person would, you don't just go railing around the house. You find a nice private spot, you make sure nobody's around.
Brett
Take your Bluetooth off.
Brady
Turn your Bluetooth off, because the car will pick that up. Have you done that?
Brett
No, but I remember you telling me that story. One of my favorites.
Brady
Turn your Bluetooth off. Because God forbid you're in the middle of one of those videos and you know the connector to the car that's pulling into the driveway you didn't know was there, and suddenly the video goes to, like, airplane. Wait, what? And maybe there's a woman and her mother in the. In the car. Oh, me. Oh, oh, oh. Fill me up.
Brett
Snap my hair.
Brady
Stop. What were you doing? Nothing. And the worst one was the Bluetooth. When I got in and my mom was in the back seat and I forgotten, that was the last video I'd watched. Start the car. Mom's in there. Probably your sister did this. And I don't care what she does. Shut up. We're gonna go eat and we're gonna have fun and come. Oh, God. That's the biggest black I've ever felt in my. Yeah, it was. I don't know what. The radio's gone mad. Is what's happening.
Brett
Your dad was right about you.
Brady
I don't think she knew that. You know what?
Dylan
I'm not hungry now.
Brady
Immediately started playing us. She probably got hungrier. Feed me that big. All right. I just better turn off. That's Sirius xm. They. They're allowed to do anything over there. Yeah. So. Yeah. Turn off your Bluetooth. That's a big rule. That's it. That's a huge rule.
Brett
Tell them they can go to your only phage panned page for exclusive content, live shows. Then send them to your grinder handle.
Brady
Right. And I got no problem with any of that. Look again, if you're gonna break into my phone to watch that. Hilarious. Your loss. We'll send it to your mom. Like, what do you think I'm gonna pay you to stop that? What do you want? Five grand. Show it to my mom. I'll do it in front of her. You're getting five grand for me. But your mother, she'll still see it. You're making an old lady very unhappy for a day. That's rough. We know what you do with your time. Yep. Why do you wear that Kaiser helmet and those Nazi patches. I'm like, I don't know. Taboo. And the whole thing sounded crazy.
Dylan
We're sending these while you're watching the match game.
Brady
Let's send it to your boss. He's gonna laugh. This is gonna be a rough one. I'm gonna get teased pretty hard. Okay. You don't care if your boss sees it? Not really. Because you know what? He's gonna sit back. Oh, geez. Nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna treat that guy with a little more respect. He's carrying. So. Yeah, I don't. I have no beef with that at all. But just be careful, because evidently, that's a big scam going around. It makes people scared. Don't send your money to anybody ever. Yeah. You know, it says J. Todd Himes is right. You get one of those bogus blackmail emails. We should all get access to one of Brett's videos and just fire one back. So we have videos of what you're doing too. It's just silly. And then I saw a thing about a girl, and she's an American girl, but it was on a British site. She removed six ribs. Six. They have a smaller waist, and they.
Brett
She a pig before?
Brady
No.
Brett
Okay.
Brady
What was her name?
Dylan
Is that how they do it when you see, like, the world's smallest waist? That woman?
Brady
I guess.
Dylan
Black and white photo.
Brady
Oh. I had to re. Look because I'm not smart. That doesn't seem like you have 12 per side. Right? That's three each side. You start feeling around your body. That's getting up there pretty good. And she had them done. And then they gave her her bones back, which I don't know how you do that. She's a trans woman, but she still looks like a woman. I don't know if that means she's got a pee pee. And then she wanted curves. That was my guess. Her name's Emily James. 17 grand is all it costs. A really good boob job is 17 grand, but you get the boob jobs. Of course. But six. $17,000 is not bad for plastic surgery. It really is.
Dylan
Three ribs on each side.
Brady
Six ribs? Yeah. You're not getting. I don't think you're going six on one. No, I don't fall over. I'd like to see that, though. But three on each side just to shrink down what used to be a manly kind of boxy body. And then I guess the ribs going away cuts in and gives courage.
Dylan
More of a curve.
Brady
Yeah. It makes it more of a feminine look. But $17,000 to do that. And then they gave her the bones back, which I asked for my bones. When they cut off my. When I got my shoulders replaced, I'm like, I want the bones. I can't do it. One of the fears was. I didn't see a good picture. I just saw a headshot.
Brett
No, just a picture of the bones.
Brady
One of the fears was, it's like a hazardous to own your own bones. And then you can do, like, science, I guess, you can build your own. You if you're nuts, like Dr. Island or Dr. Moreau or whatever. But they wouldn't let me have them because they're like, you can do stuff with bones. I'm like, oh, my own. There's the bag of bones. She's gonna make a crown out of her bones. And doesn't this just like. Shouldn't the trans community be the first ones to tell her to shut up? Because it just lends credibility to the idea that you're mentally disturbed if you want to switch out. This is proof that she's not 100% there. Now, that picture right there. Sort of an attractive fella with pink hair. 17 grand to have six ribs removed. And I don't know what doctors do that. Is that her?
Brett
I don't know. It seems like there's a bunch of them.
Brady
There's a couple pictures that are.
Brett
I don't know if that's her, though.
Brady
Okay. A couple of them. I'm. I'm diving in.
Brett
Yeah, just move them balls over.
Brady
Scoot your balls out of the way. Could you hold those up so I don't feel them hitting me? Because we're close to being happy here. I'm not disappointed in that, but I'm.
Dylan
Not seeing, you know, the. The results.
Brady
Like, yeah, I'm not seeing a full body shot, but I think.
Brett
I think she's still healing. I think that's.
Brady
Oh, yeah, that's true. Probably not a lot of shots yet, but what doctors do those more. Oh, your organs. Yeah. Your lungs hang out. Your pancreas. Your liver's behind you on that. That's low end. Get healthy and at all. What doctor is doing this? And her argument basically, was coming back. It was like, look, it's not that healthy to have a Brazilian butt lift either. But you're not removing skeleton parts like nose jobs, I guess. Are. I got three or four in a row. Brady, you started this story about ribs, and he's been wildly disappointed since. It's not about eating them. You can get your own ribs back and Then somebody told her, boil them into a broth and give them to like, see how you taste. And that was the first interesting thing I thought of having your own ribs. Is that. Yeah, let's put that in and make a. Make a base. Like make a. What do they have that. That. The thing that you do later. You have the stew, the broth. The broth. Yeah, I would do that, but I don't want my ribs gone. Who. What doctor is doing this? Like, can you just Google that? I want rib removal surgery in Phoenix.
Dylan
Is that she went off the grid to get that done.
Brady
She didn't. She did here in the States. It wasn't like off the grid. It's like, it's not an unusual thing, evidently. I didn't know that. 17 grand. That's big. That's a. That's not a crazy price tag to have six ribs taken. I just don't know that there's doctors that should be doing that. It sounds like it should be illegal, but she's going to make it.
Brett
Indiana does it.
Brady
They do it in Indiana, of course, for meth money. Who's got 17 grand in cash in Indiana? They got meth and they trade.
Brett
They take fentanyl and barter and fentanyl. Dr. Barry Epley, waist and torso narrowing.
Brady
Rib removal surgery in Carmel, Indiana. And they remove your bottom three ribs on each side. Look at that.
Dylan
I could see 12 there. You know, that's a little niblet, huh? Rib.
Brady
Oh, yeah.
Dylan
Small.
Brady
Well, it works. Look at that. That's kind of a fan. That lady's got a nice set of lats.
Dylan
Looks like Franco Colombo back in the day with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Brady
There's a guy who did it.
Dylan
Is that a guy?
Brady
Well, maybe not one.
Brett
One time.
Brady
Yeah. He's trying to change that. It works. I'm looking at these pictures.
Brett
This one needs a butt lift.
Brady
Well, she's got a little body.
Brett
I don't know why ribs first worry about the waist for.
Brady
Why did we have to get a full naked picture of that?
Brett
Craters.
Brady
It does make a curve. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. So this is the thing. This isn't like some sort of going to Mexico. Those rip ribs out of your body and go, you're good. That's crazy. And it's only 17. I thought that one would be like a hundred grand. You gotta like you. Yeah. She needs an ass. Yeah.
Brett
Worry about that ass.
Brady
Yeah. Don't worry about your shape. If you've Got no ass. Your ass becomes first. Well, look at the cans on that weirdo. What is that? That looks like something I would draw. Like, that's a poorly drawn clown. Cans that is. Those things look like those salt mines in the Midwest that you drive by. Oh, my Lord. And then there's one whose nipples are looking all over the place. One looking up, one looking down. This doctor is insane. Anyway, so rib removal, that's next evident up. If you'd have told my grandpa, you know, in the future, granddad, they're going to just shove tons of fat in women's asses, like massive amounts of it, and make their butts like horses butts. And you'd be like, ah, it's for crazy people. Yeah, I know that's what you think, but it's not. It's like real common chin surgeries. Really normal.
Brett
Five stars for that.
Brady
You know, grandpa, in the future, they're going to take big bags of plastic goofy and shove them in women's can. Like even if they've already got them and make gigantic breasts. What in the world would they do something like that for at. They're gonna though just the crazies. No, almost all of them, like 80% of them are gonna do this. Almost all of them. You know, grandpa, in the future, ladies who don't have a lot of curves are gonna have the bottom parts of their rib cage removed. That's insanity. Well, that's coming. I have a feeling once women start seeing this and the price tag is not too high and probably goes down from here. If you go to Mexico for seven or eight thousand dollars and end up with a 21 inch waist, this is, this is going to be this in the next 10 or 15 years. This is going to be pretty common. You probably can't wear a tight shirt because you'll just smash your liver or your, your. I guess your pancreas is protected there.
Dylan
As exposed as I thought. This guy's doing it.
Brady
Oh, I know. I don't think this is a good idea. Like, your ribs are there for a reason. It's, you know, it's not like they just hang down.
Dylan
There's a little bit of a design. You're gonna look good.
Brady
Yeah, we went a little further down there because just in case you get long, long. It's in there. Fits. Sort of like, you know, kind of the Darwin's way of saying this is better. This is a good. We might have at one point had like bulkier ribs or less ribs, you know, through all the time and survival and Darwinism and stuff like that. We came up with a pretty good design for this rib cage, and we're using it. We're using the hell out of it. We keep our organs in this little rib pouch. Spreads like an accordion. Does nice things. You want to remove a few of those, do it at your own risk. It's for beauty's sake. And then you got to worry. The whole reason you're doing is to look better. So you'd have dudes nail you, but they can't hit you too hard or your lungs will pop and you get like. Because they're exposed. God. Diet and exercise scares the hell out of people. But they'll have their ribs removed.
Dylan
And when you're older, someone has to do chest compressions.
Brady
No, they'll crush her. Like, I'm like, mummy does.
Dylan
I have so many you can break.
Brady
That's true. It's like, I can't break your ribs because I don't know what you did here. Anyway, ladies, you've gone mad. So good on you. Enjoy the but. Jeff, she's a. Well, it's a fellow, though. Let's not fool ourselves. That's a guy trying to be a lady. I'm not so sure. Also, is Petrus true? And all those ladies in that Indiana website, and that's the only one you saw that'll do the rib removal.
Brett
That's the only first one that came up. It wasn't anybody in there.
Dylan
Half a rack.
Brady
You didn't write, like, Scottsdale rib removal.
Brett
I wrote Arizona or Phoenix.
Brady
Brady just went half slab on it. Because it'll still. He'll still bring it back, baby. Back. There's a woman parting herself out, and Brady's still like, put some sauce on that. You hear? Ribs. You can't get past the idea that those are edible. Come here, little riblet. Would you eat? No, you wouldn't. Why not? She doesn't want them burnt ends. Why not?
Dylan
Not that curious.
Brady
You're not that curious about ribs that come out of a transsexual. Boy, that's. Yeah, that's where my curiosity starts. Here's some transsexual ribs. I want to know the next sentence. I'm not walking away disinterested in that conversation. We made a nice broth. All right. You wouldn't. A little of that broth you wouldn't dip your finger in?
Dylan
No.
Brady
Why? All right, Maybe trenny ribs. You'd have to try that. You couldn't get through that. They fall right off the bone. I'd do it. I'D do it like a soccer player in the Andy.
Dylan
Like veal.
Brady
Oh. Why would it be like, oh? Cause you just don't like the idea.
Dylan
You'Re saying it's tender and stuff.
Brady
I don't know. I won't eat veal because I won't eat a baby cow. I think it's wrong. Makes me sad. I'd eat a tranny's unwanted ribs. That doesn't bother me at all. The tranny had a choice to hand her ribs out.
Brett
And those jar jobs are as expensive.
Brady
Yes. You can start getting in like 20 grand for nose jobs. Those BBLS and that stuff. I was watching a. I forget what show it was. It was a TV show. There's like $35,000 to get that done.
Brett
There's revision, rhinoplasty.
Brady
That one girl needed a nose job.
Dylan
Look at the hook.
Brady
I'd have been embarrassed to give the before picture to him. They did a nice job on her. She went from looking like me to being a decent looking human being. Yeah. Even get into, like, the lip injections and Botox and all that stuff. You can start getting some prices. That 17 grand to have your ribs taken out isn't bad.
Brett
8 to 10 grand for your chin augmentation.
Brady
Yeah. Some of you boxy broads should start thinking about taking some ribs out and hand them over to Brady. We'll open up Porkopolis again. Yeah, it's a. What a strange world. Never would have thought it would come to this. It's insane. What do you got on the big board of musical treats there, Brett? Don't eat people's ribs unless they offer. That's a rule.
Brett
All right, Wake up. Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop. It is now time to head on up north. They're getting. They're getting snow now, finally. But yeah. So Action Ride Shop. They got everything you're going to need to get up there. Snowboarding, skis. Whatever you need, they got it over there in Gilbert Road and Southern. And don't forget, new store opening up beginning of next month. Next over there right by the Hawes trailhead. So power and McDowell did a lot.
Brady
Of riding this weekend. Yeah, I need to get out. Good, good, good. Time to get out. Except for it is a lot. Well, I'm doing it mainly because I got those meta glasses and you can listen to music through your glasses and it's actually really good sound, so I'm testing those out. It's crowded. There are a lot of families on your left. Oh, it's a constant. And old People don't. They don't know what to do when you say dance. And then they start running around. I almost killed, like, four old ladies yesterday, accidentally.
Dylan
A lot of ribs.
Brady
Oh, there's a lot of. See? But he's still thinking about the ribs. He's still got it on. He said he would need them, but he can't get it off his plate. I can't leave your mind. I wonder what those would taste like. You do have curio. You say you're not that curious, but you'd be curious if I served you a plate of ribs. What is this? Just have a bite.
Brett
Just try them.
Brady
I'll tell you later.
Dylan
Oh, that's pretty good.
Brady
That's delightful. Those are ribs. What do you mean? Like a cow that wanted to be a bull? Sort of. You'd eat those?
Dylan
Not wag you.
Brady
So you wouldn't do the soccer player thing? Crash in the Andes?
Dylan
If I had to. Yeah, you would. I'd need fire, though. I couldn't do you.
Brady
Couldn't go wrong.
Brett
Not tartar.
Brady
First day I get peckish about 5.
Brett
O'Clock, grabbing a raw crank and just.
Brady
Yeah.
Brett
Oh, down on it or what?
Brady
I just start digging in. First guy that falls asleep. We're not even talking about death. First guy falls asleep is gonna get bitten. I'm taking a chunk. I don't do well hungry. I've gotta eat something. And it's not gonna be a lot. I'm not gonna overindulge. You might be delicious. I'm gonna save some for everyone else. But most certainly the plane crash. Oh, yeah. And eat Brady first. We've talked about this. He's got to go first. He provides the most for the most people, so we don't have to eat a lot of people. Plus, he's got a voracious appetite. So if we start eating someone else, that product's gonna go faster. You take out the biggest guy you have to, because he's gonna eat you for sure.
Dylan
You have a short window.
Brady
Yeah, very. That guy has to go like, the plane would crash and like, oh, my God. How many survivors are the. Brett, you're alive. Oh, thank God. Brady's still alive. And then they would see John just hitting Brady in the back of the head with a rock. Like, what are you doing? Like, we gotta get rid of this one. He's gonna get five. There's no possible. We don't have any food left. There's no provisions. You think we're gonna keep him around? No, sir. What'd you hit me for? We had to incapacitate your ass fast. You have anything to snack on? See, I told you. Told you. You got any tranny ribs? Anyway? All right.
Brett
On the list, Quiet ride. Bang your head for John. Steelers, yeah. AC dc Whole lot of Rosie for Kevin Ray's kid. Led Zeppelin. Whole lot of love for Kevin Ray's kid. Avatar, Ozzy. Metallica, Van Halen. Avatar, Chevelle, Snot, Danko, Pantera. Hate breed. Megadeth.
Brady
The problem was that Zach saw very small girls as 190 pounds. So weird. Never seen somebody miss that badly on weight guesses ever. And, I mean, it's a strange night.
Brett
Between that and Fitz in his ones.
Brady
Fits in the jumper and Zach not knowing numbers was jumper.
Dylan
That's.
Brady
But he'll be here. He'll be here today, and he's gonna wear those. It's his new thing. He's like, every day, like, all right, okay. Hopefully no plumbing or electrical goes wrong because they're gonna lean on you. You look. It's like dressing like a cop. Somebody's gonna say, hey, we need your help eventually. Like, no, no, I'm just in the uniform. It's. You start dressing like a plumber and there's plumbing issues. They're gonna look at you. Can you help? Hopefully there's no emergency, but around this building, right? This place fall apart. Let's go with a Danko. All right. Little Danko Jones this morning. That's not a bad thing. Yeah, the trails are packed full. The weather is perfect and really nice, and I hit those trails. I also was riding my E bike, and then yesterday went on the regular bike, and I realized how much that E bike helps. I was gassed out, but, yeah, it's fun. You got to get on a bike. But we get so much good weather and so many trails here. Run over to Josh and just say, we're doing something here.
Brett
Hook a brother up.
Brady
Oh, it's so good. That's so great that they got that store opening up by the trail. It's gonna be great. I think bad thoughts is what we'll do here, because that's Brady thinking about that lady's ribs for sure. You say you wouldn't. You'd eat tranny ribs.
Dylan
I'd eat anyone's ribs.
Brady
If there was a story. Like, you go to, like, Viet Shack, like, unlike, you don't even know what it is, and you'll walk in there, tranny ribs. That's going to make you go, what's this about? You're the only one that would search that Viet shack might be good. Most people will drive back past that and be, like, expanded. I don't know what's inside there. Yeah, I think it's great. Good for. Good for tong train Thai Brady spending so much money on a vheck. We got a bigger stool. We have a Brady room. We have a tranny room. You right? It's a very possibly.
Brett
It's like the rah rah room over at Viet chakra.
Brady
It's the rah rah. And it's only that because people are. Mouths are awful. All rah, rah, rah, rah, rah. No, no, no. It's Danko. I think bad thoughts. It's your wake him ups. It's 98. It's out of control now. 98.
Episode: Fear Thy Neighbor Show Has John Worried About Brady - New Email Scam Claims To Have Access To Your Phone And Tries To Blackmail You - Trans Woman Has Ribs Removed To Look More Shapely As We Wonder If Brady Would Eat Human Ribs
Release Date: January 13, 2025
Host/Authors: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Podcast: 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio
The episode delves into the reality-inspired TV show "Fear Thy Neighbor," where ordinary neighborly disputes escalate into deadly confrontations. Brady Bogen provides an in-depth review of a particularly intense episode, highlighting how minor disagreements can spiral out of control.
Brady (07:07): "Every single day I look, there's 77 episodes of Fear Thy Neighbor. All end in someone dying. All of them."
Brady recounts a disturbing episode where neighbors accuse each other of killing a dog, leading to mutual animosity without any police intervention. The situation worsens when the aggrieved neighbor inadvertently destroys the accused neighbor's litter of puppies, further intensifying the feud.
Brady (09:02): "And then the guy's still mad about his dog, and he goes towards their house and sees the box of puppies, runs the box of puppies over."
This segment sets the stage for John's humorous yet concerned remarks about Brady's demeanor and potential for conflict, drawing parallels between the show's dramatized violence and their real-life interactions.
John (10:26): "Because if anything, Laser all over again."
John humorously warns Brady about his competitive nature, suggesting that Brady might one day find himself embroiled in a neighborly dispute akin to those depicted on the show.
The conversation transitions to a pressing issue many listeners face: email scams that claim to have access to personal phone cameras, threatening to blackmail recipients with compromising videos.
Brady discusses the nature of these scams, comparing them to scenarios portrayed in popular media like "Black Mirror." He emphasizes the importance of not engaging with these fraudulent messages to prevent further intrusion.
Brady (17:07): "So if you're getting those, they're actually, evidently they're going. And they go right to your regular email. They're not even in spam. It's like, right in your emails."
The hosts share personal anecdotes and hypothetical responses to such threats, blending humor with cautionary advice.
Brady (18:22): "If you're gonna break into my phone to watch that. Hilarious. Your loss. We'll send it to your mom."
This lighthearted approach underscores the severity of digital privacy breaches while offering listeners practical tips to safeguard their information, such as disabling Bluetooth and being wary of unsolicited emails.
Shifting gears, the podcast explores a controversial topic: a trans woman's decision to have six ribs removed to achieve a more shapely figure. The hosts debate the ethics, health implications, and societal pressures surrounding such extensive cosmetic surgery.
Brady (32:52): "She removed six ribs. She has a smaller waist... I don't know if that means she's got a pee pee."
The discussion touches on the medical feasibility and risks of rib removal, with Brady expressing skepticism about the necessity and safety of the procedure.
Brady (34:02): "It's not about eating them. You can get your own ribs back and then somebody told her, boil them into a broth and give them to like, see how you taste."
The conversation humorously contemplates the absurdity of consuming one's own rib remnants, highlighting the extremes of body modification trends.
Brady (41:07): "We keep our organs in this little rib pouch. Spreads like an accordion."
Ultimately, the hosts critique the lengths to which individuals might go for aesthetic reasons, questioning societal standards and the influence of beauty norms on personal decisions.
Throughout the episode, the hosts engage in playful banter, sharing stories about door-to-door evangelists and the challenges of handling unsolicited visitors.
Brady (15:16): "We're sending these while you're watching the match game."
Brady also touches on local events and community updates, promoting upcoming comedy shows and local businesses, ensuring the conversation remains anchored in the Arizona community.
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully weaves together humor, social commentary, and personal anecdotes to address contemporary issues. From dissecting the dramatic narratives of neighborly conflicts to tackling the anxieties of digital privacy breaches and the extremes of body modification, the hosts offer listeners a blend of entertainment and thoughtful discussion. Notable quotes and engaging dialogue ensure that even those unfamiliar with the episode can appreciate the depth and dynamism of the conversation.
For more insights and entertainment, tune in to Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD weekdays from 5:30 AM to 10:00 AM or visit www.98kupd.com.