01-16-25 - Vince Emails In That 2025 Got Off To Great Start And He And His Wife Are Pregnant But She Blindsided Him By Leaving And Saying They Need To Talk

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: January 16, 2025
Title: Vince Emails In – A Promising Start Turned Turbulent

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Introduction

In the January 16, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD, host John Holmberg and his co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo dive into a heartfelt and tumultuous listener email from Vince, who shares a series of life-changing events that have left him in emotional turmoil. This episode masterfully blends humor with genuine concern, offering listeners both entertainment and relatable insights into unexpected relationship challenges.

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Vince’s Story: A Rollercoaster Beginning

Vince reached out to the show with what initially seemed like a dream start to the year. His email detailed:

• Marriage: Vince married the love of his life on January 1st.
• Career Advancement: He secured a new job on January 6th, doubling his previous salary.
• Pregnancy Announcement: His wife revealed she was pregnant, an event that occurred around Thanksgiving.

Despite these positive developments, Vince finds himself blindsided by his wife’s sudden departure and her request to "talk" about their relationship.

Notable Quote:

"2025 has started with a bang. I got married on January 1st to the love of my life... However, earlier this week my wife said that she had something to tell me and wanted to talk to me this weekend."
— Vince (00:31)

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Hosts’ Initial Reactions

Upon reading Vince's email, the hosts immediately empathized with his situation, expressing concern and attempting to decode the underlying issues his wife might be facing. They speculated on various potential reasons for her sudden need to discuss their relationship.

Notable Quote:

"She can't just disappear for four or five days. Now, I have had a friend who got blindsided by a wife 20 years into their marriage..."
— Brady (05:35)

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Possible Scenarios Explored

The hosts explored multiple scenarios that could explain Vince’s predicament:

1. Infidelity Concerns:

   • Brady suggested that Vince's wife might suspect infidelity, questioning the paternity of their unborn child.
   • Bret added that there could be deeper issues, such as undisclosed previous pregnancies or past relationships affecting her decision.

   Notable Quote:

   "My guess is that she's concerned that that baby is someone else's."
   — Brady (07:01)

2. Personal Struggles:

   • Brady pondered if his wife might be dealing with personal issues, such as addiction, which led to her abrupt departure.

   Notable Quote:

   "She's addicted to crystal methamphetamine and I have been for years. He had no idea that his wife... she was done."
   — Brady (06:32)

3. Emotional Overwhelm:

   • The hosts considered that the rapid changes—marriage, a new job, and pregnancy—could have overwhelmed Vince’s wife, prompting her to seek space to process her emotions.

   Notable Quote:

   "Maybe she's had a breakdown and there's... that's an awful lot to take in two weeks."
   — Brady (36:34)

4. Identity Crisis:

   • An outlandish yet humorous suggestion was that his wife might be questioning her gender identity, leading her to leave Vince.

   Notable Quote:

   "Maybe she's a dude. And she's telling me she's a post op tranny."
   — Brady (19:01)

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Advice and Recommendations

The hosts offered Vince various pieces of advice, blending practical suggestions with their signature humor:

• Immediate Action: Encouraged Vince to confront his wife promptly rather than allowing the days to pass in uncertainty.

  Notable Quote:

  "Why are you giving her all this time? Tell me now or the next phone call it's an annulment request to leave him hanging."
  — Brady (20:35)

• Annulment Consideration: Suggested that Vince consider seeking an annulment, especially given the short duration of his marriage and the financial implications tied to a potential unconfirmed paternity.

  Notable Quote:

  "That's a double whammy. She cheated and now she's got the clap. Needs four days to clean that."
  — Brady (23:07)

• DNA Testing: Proposed that Vince request a DNA test to confirm paternity, providing him with clarity and easing his concerns about his unborn child’s legitimacy.

  Notable Quote:

  "Anybody with a baby should just for no reason at all, just look at their wife today and say, I want a DNA test on the kid."
  — Brady (40:17)

• Final Call to Action: Ultimately, the hosts urged Vince to take decisive action, either by addressing the issues head-on or making the difficult decision to end the relationship to prevent prolonged anxiety and uncertainty.

  Notable Quote:

  "You should make the call. You're a man. Maybe she's a lesbo John, and she's leaving him for another woman."
  — Brady (27:13)

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Hosts’ Humorous Interlude

Throughout the episode, the hosts interspersed their serious discussions with humorous anecdotes and banter, maintaining an engaging and entertaining atmosphere:

• Golf Commentary: Brady enthusiastically discussed Tiger Woods' new golf stadium concept, blending sports talk with light-hearted critiques.

  Notable Quote:

  "He’s got a stadium over there... it's built for television... it's neat."
  — Brady (02:00)

• Satirical Scenarios: They fabricated exaggerated scenarios, such as Vince's wife possibly engaging in outlandish behaviors, to inject humor into the conversation.

  Notable Quote:

  "Maybe she's going to have one of those midget babies like in the movie Tiptoes."
  — Brady (36:45)

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Conclusion

The January 16th episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness skillfully balanced providing heartfelt advice with entertaining banter. Vince's email served as a catalyst for the hosts to explore a range of possible relationship issues, offering listeners both practical suggestions and comedic relief. The episode underscored the unpredictability of life’s early stages in marriage and parenthood, while reaffirming the show’s commitment to engaging and relatable content for its Arizona audience.

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Key Takeaways

• Immediate Communication: Address relationship concerns head-on to avoid prolonged uncertainty.
• Consider Professional Help: Seeking therapy or counseling can provide structured support during turbulent times.
• Humor as a Coping Mechanism: Balancing serious discussions with humor can alleviate stress and foster a supportive community.

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For more episodes and listener stories, visit 98KUPD.com.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up North features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe DeRosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here.

[Brady]

For the amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed right. Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it, too. And you can get rid of your pain and start saying, yes, I can to all the things you want to do. And. And all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute head there right now. The Core Institute dot com. Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Thursday. My name's John. How are you? There's Brady, there's Brett. There's Big Dick Toledo. This is the morning sickness. And we are off and running. We had another glorious day here in paradise. Perfect. Absolutely. Perf. Outside right now. Glorious and ready to go for a perfect morning. I am just taken aback by how much I want to be outside right now. And it's bad because so does everybody else. And I'm just getting angry at them. So every time I try to do something, there's piles of cars and whatever, it turns me around. I get mad at society for liking the place as much as I like it. So doesn't necessarily make me right, but certainly does like rage. I do. I have. I. Yeah, I have. I have commonality, common interest, rage. You guys have the same idea I have. How dare you? Yeah, it's kind of basically me wishing that it was all. I do that with golf. The reason. One of the reasons I hate golf is because other people play. I. I need to have that Tiger woods situation. But I'm not good at anything in My life enough to have my own golf course. You know, Tiger's got that thing. I love what Tiger woods is doing, though. He's revolutionizing golf again for people who don't want to walk all that way or be outside that long. That new thing he's got going on, it's going to. Whether it works for professionals, I don't know. But if you haven't seen it, he's got a stadium over there. He's got one in Florida, and I think they're building in la, and they got. The one in Los Angeles is one where they're playing. It's got that undulating fake green, that gigantic screen. It looks like the 16th hole here. It's a stadium, and teams of pro golfers play each other on multiple court with a shot clock. And it's built for television. And it's just. And you can hear the guys talking, and it's fun, and you don't have to sit and, you know, pretend it's some sort of old man's game. It's. It's neat. So he'll. I can't wait till they build a bunch of those.

[Brett]

Well, they just had that event. I don't know how it did. I missed it. They televised.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah, they did. It's a league. They've done it three weeks in a row. Yeah, I watched a couple of them the last two weeks. I thought it was just phenomenal.

[Brett]

You liked it?

[Brady]

Oh, I thought it was awesome. Absolutely awesome. And yeah, you're.

[Brett]

I talked about three other people.

[Brady]

Oh, it's not. Four people over the age of 45. All those people are going to be like, nah, it's for younger people. It's video game with physical activity. And it's awesome.

[Brett]

And it's funny because people that watch golf, they said it's tough enough watching regular golf.

[Brady]

This one's different. There's four courses going at once. You're going. Four dudes playing different holes at one time. It's just amazing. It's so cool. I thought it was neat and we can do it. It's going to cost fortune. Plus, golf has gotten to the point where you can't even do it. Like, there's. There's a friend of mine, one of the golf. He's okay, get on it. Blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, how much is that? Right? And I forgot the course, so. 325. Yeah. Like, I'm not. No, I don't. If I'm having a bad day golfing, the last thing I want to do is have a $300 tag over my head for 18. Yeah.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah. Okay.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's a nice place, but it's like I'm not spending.

[Brett]

Yeah, you're at high rates right.

[Brady]

Right now. And it's going to get worse in the next month when all the, you know, the Phoenix open people show up. Then spring training happens. Summertime's the time to go. But I can't, you know. Yes. It's too hard to justify getting people. But yeah, I like summertime. I don't mind the heat. Doesn't bother me. I got this email this morning. It's got my interest piqued and I clipped a little part of it out. It said, hey, Holmberg, 2025 has started with a bang. I got married on January 1st to the love of my life. I got a brand new job. They started January 6th. That doubled my pay. This week my wife hits me with that she's pregnant. We evidently knocked up my wife over Thanksgiving week. And I couldn't be happier on cloud nine. I'm glad it's we on cloud cloud nine for the last week and a half. However, earlier this week my wife said that she had something to tell me and wanted to talk to me this weekend. Here we are. Wednesday night, it says. But Thursday she left the house and she said she doesn't want to talk. We haven't talked since Tuesday night. She asked me not to reach out. She needs time. I am absolutely spinning. Help me out. My brain's locked. The baby's mine. There's no way. It's not. She seems so happy. She says it's not divorce unless I want it to be. But we haven't even talked about it. Have anybody ever been through this? I can't even imagine what's coming my way. Vince.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Poor little fella.

[Brett]

Sounds like a transgression of some sort.

[Brady]

She's. Yeah. My guess is that she's not sure that baby's yours. That's the first thing that comes to mind. That has got to be the first. But here's the mean part. If she needs to stack up, Vince, she can't just disappear for four or five days. Now, I have had a friend. I've had two friends. You have one too. The same guy I have who got blindsided by a wife 20 years into their marriage. That said, there hasn't been a week of our marriage that I haven't been with someone else. Bone to bone. Bone. Including our wedding day, our honeymoon. It was a non stop. If I saw a dude and he was interested I did it. I'm hooking up. I'm not gonna say just because she might find me and try to. Try to f me to death. Yeah. So Brady and I got that story together and we couldn't believe it. And you know how she told him, took him to, like, a camp?

[Brett]

Well, he. For people suggested it.

[Brady]

Well, no, that was how she told him.

[Brett]

He didn't know what I'm saying. They went to a.

[Brady]

They were. No, he couldn't have suggested it because the camp was specifically designed for people to tell their spouses. Here's what I've been up to. Remember she handed him the book that she had written with all the people in it?

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

He suggested therapy afterwards, which was another getaway. And then he went to a getaway on his own for people who had been hit with this. But it was basically, you know, she was bipolar.

[Brett]

It was like they were together doing this thing and all of a sudden.

[Brady]

All right, no, the camp. Camp was designed to tell him, as far as I understood, like, what I was understood. Like, she said, we should go do this couples retreat in this thing and then smashes him with like a, you know, leather bound book of all her transgressions. I have a. Another friend who was. Well, it wasn't a friend, but it was an acquaintance of my mother's who was blindsided. Dude was blindsided by his wife who just basically says, I'm addicted to crystal methamphetamine and I have been for years. He had no idea that his wife and his wife, she was at. She was done. Which because everybody thinks. And this is. This is the. This is the danger of what they talk to you about with crystal meth and drugs and stuff is that you're immediately going to be picking scabs off your face and about £12. That happens. But there's tons of people who are, you know, meth freaks functioning, who are functioning and look fairly normal. There's a lot of drug. So she hits him over the head that she's got a drug problem and it's bad. There's another thing to worry about, Vince. Oh, I'm not trying to talk you down. Everything that's gonna happen to Vince this weekend is going to be bad. I'm just throwing out some scenarios. There is no way she comes to you and said, I needed three or four days to plan a trip to Aruba. She's not bringing you. You're not winning a car. This is. Nothing good is coming from. I need four or five days to talk to you and Then we'll discuss it.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Run.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Just understand what Brett believes. Love has no boundaries.

[Brady]

I believe it does. It's bounded. Oh, love has boundaries, my friends. Loads of them. And she's about to hit you with a few of them. Because if love had no boundaries, somebody could come to you and go, I had sex with the Arizona Cardinals. You're like, honey, I still love you. There are no boundaries. You have boundaries. You have conditions. You have all sorts of stuff.

[Brett]

I'll get over that. You know, we. I like other people.

[Brady]

I like football.

[Brett]

It's an honor to have the Cardinals.

[Brady]

There is no such thing as that.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Cardinals pick a better team.

[Brady]

Unconditional. At least. Bang. The Chiefs, for God's sakes. Hit a dynasty in their stride. Love has. It's. It's. There's no such thing as unconditional love. There's no such. Immediately, it's unconditional. We're unconditional love. Oh, yeah. What if you found out he drained all of the bank account and gambled and was getting hookers regularly? Well, that would just be awful. He's a liar. So there's conditions. We have rules. We have conditions. There's no such thing. Even people say that about dogs. And as much as I love dogs, there's the ultimate condition. If you don't feed them, they don't love you. Yeah, they don't love you anymore.

[Brett]

See what happens?

[Brady]

You stop feeding a dog, suddenly their unconditional love is like, you know what? I'm going to start seeking out some. Some unconditional love elsewhere.

[Big Dick Toledo]

That's the old thing. You lock your dog in a trunk or lock your wife in a trunk.

[Brady]

Who'S happy to see it? Yeah. I'll tell you which one isn't going to be happy to see you is the wife. I'll tell you when they're both not happy to see you. If you haven't fed that dog in the trunk for a few days, he's going to be. You are suddenly the first piece of meat he's seen since he ate your wife in that trunk. And speaking of eating your wife, Vince, somebody's doing that, you've got a big problem on your hands. I would venture to guess she's concerned that that baby is someone else's.

[Brett]

That I also thought that maybe it's even a deeper deal, that maybe she had, you know, a previous pregnancy.

[Brady]

Oh, here we go.

[Brett]

And then never did, you know, basically put the kid up for this one. Just adoption, it could be.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Or maybe I think it's little Lamont.

[Brady]

It could be a little Lamont. That's my. That's how every white guy's first thought. Of course, Steve Nash disease.

[Brett]

It just was. She was young and she.

[Brady]

How about this? She's taking these next few days to go get some Sprite and graham crackers and get rid of this baby.

[Brett]

Don't want to have the baby.

[Brady]

Yeah. And she's going to come back Saturday and say, I lost it. I lost it. But she's telling you that. So she's telling you, and she's got to come back and say, I got rid of it, which is different than I lost it. If she was going to do that, I would give her the advice, say, look, you're. You're 100% wrong, not discussing this, but if you go do it, go do it. And then pretend you lost the baby naturally. Don't tell him you went and had a quiet abortion and didn't talk to him about it. That's horrible. Now, Vince, your wife is evil. This is evil to put somebody through this for five years.

[Brett]

Leave them hanging.

[Brady]

That's what she's done. That's just a terrible email. And he sends it to me. Now I've got anxiety and I don't even know these people. Maybe she met. Maybe she met Gary's wife and she's a lesbian now.

[Brett]

What was the verbiage she was using that divorce?

[Brady]

Divorce isn't an option unless you want it to be. Okay, so what she's gonna hit him with will be his decision. She's basically gonna club him over the head with something horrible and hope he goes, nah, we'll work it out. But she knows the. The ball's about to be in his court, and she needed three or four days.

[Brett]

I'm pretty sure it's your baby, but.

[Brady]

Man, I did have a little. And what do you do?

[Brett]

Fling.

[Brady]

I had a fling around the same time with probably somebody, and it was the best man. Yeah, it was. Look, I'm gonna speculate because that's what he asked us to do. It's probably some guy who she. Right before her wedding, January 1st, through the holiday, she probably thought, I gotta see this dude one more time to see if I've still got something before I get married. And it led to something else. And then she realized after she boned him that it wasn't that. And now she's pickled.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Well, how long they've been married again?

[Brady]

Since January 1st.

[Brett]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

I mean, you can annul it. The good news is you can annul it. Are you screwed? It's awfully fast to be married, pregnant, all that stuff.

[Big Dick Toledo]

And I heard about within a month. Not even a month.

[Brady]

It's been.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah, 15 weeks.

[Brett]

Everything's humming along.

[Brady]

They were married for a fortnight. Well, I mean, maybe it's not so bad, Vince. Maybe she's just got, you know, psoriasis.

[Brett]

But at the same time then is this going to be reoccurring? You know, like when problems.

[Brady]

She leaves for a few days. Right? My ex wife used to do.

[Brett]

I can't do this right now.

[Brady]

All right? And she disappears and come back with a sheet. Like a one sheet with bullet points of the things she wants to discuss. Like it was. It was interesting because it was something I didn't. I would never have done. And you have a. You have an argument sheet. Like you go into it. She was very business oriented. An argument sheets like, all right, here are the. Here's what we're going to discuss today. Here's what's on the agenda. And I'm like, wow, we're going to go down. But then you realize how selfish it is because she's like, I don't want to hear from you. Here's my five or six points that I'm going to argue with you. And then you read it and you can't help but be a human being, then have counterpoints to each one and then forget why you're mad. So you're just mad at mad. And then it didn't work. It was a terrible. But yeah, she would come out of a. Come out of the computer room at the time and hand me a sheet and said, here, mull this over and we'll discuss it later. I've given you. I've given you the bullet points for the meeting we're gonna have later. And it never worked out. Visit Homebirds Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com.

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[Wayne]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with Wayne.

[Brady]

From Amco and Wayne, now that it's Getting warmer. I turned on the AC in my car and the air's blowing kind of cool, but it really smells like a basement. What can I do about that? Larry, your car's AC system should be checked and serviced every year. Plus replacing the cabin air filter helps the air bl and takes away any nasty smell. Nice.

[Wayne]

Is that a big deal to get done?

[Brady]

Not at all. It takes about an hour and in most cases we can do it while you wait.

[Brett]

That's awesome.

[Brady]

I'll say. We're Amco. Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco Double A MCO transmissions and a whole lot more.

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[Michael]

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[Brady]

Holmberg's Morning Sickness. I would turn into that dude in Philadelphia and start calling her a dumb the whole time. And that was wrong of me. I've learned my lesson there too.

[Brett]

But every once in a while you'd be watching TV and you could hear in the office.

[Brady]

Oh, and it was one of those dot mat like how much are you printing in there? What'd you write? A new thing to the Bible. That's a lot. You'll see. I don't read well. Cliff Notes. Oh, I'm bullet pointing. Don't worry, I'm highlighting the most important parts and putting it in bold.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Old Testament, New Testament, now Testament.

[Brady]

Yeah. Oh, then I tried it once. I Went in there and fired off a few of my bullet point argument and gave a turn. She goes, what's this like? Well, it's kind of your method of.

[Brett]

Oh, you're just.

[Brady]

I see what's happening. Like, completely different.

[Brett]

It's in crayon.

[Brady]

Well, yeah, and it was misspelled stuff, and there was doodles in the corner and then, like, occasionally a joke. But yeah. I mean, I tried it her way once and she thought I was making fun of her. It didn't. It wasn't good. So this thing says, I think Vince's wife got knocked up by someone else. She planned this wedding and waited to get the new job. Now she's asking for the divorce, even if it's not his. She has him locked up for alimony. No, she doesn't, ryan, because in 14 days, you can annul this thing. That's too fast. You can get this annulled. Now you are screwed on that kid if it does come out yours. So if I'm you, I start rooting for the story that she says, yeah, I banged some other guy and that baby might not be yours. I'm like, okay, then we'll just annul this thing like it never happened, and you run off and have your baby with some other guy. The worst part is she may come back with the test later that says it is, and then you're stuck to her. So you might have an STD with a name and, like, you got to send it to college and stuff, but the good news is you'll have it annulled and you won't owe her any more money. That's tough.

[Brett]

What if it's something like that? Like, she didn't disclose that she. I'm worried about the baby because I've never told you I have herpes. It's never been a flare up or anything, and so I've been keeping that from you.

[Brady]

Well, that would be an interesting way to tell them I've got herpes. It's gonna affect our baby.

[Brett]

It could. Potentially.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Says Arizona has no time on annulments.

[Brady]

No time. Well, I do know that sooner than later, I have. That's true. There was a someone I know who had one. After 20 years. Yeah. But it was through the church. Oh, that's. Oh, it was insanity. Yeah. They made everybody that he taught, like, his whole family had to write letters and get interviewed. And because he wanted. He wanted to announce, like. And everybody in the family's like, it's been over 20 years. Like, you can't pretend this didn't you got kids. You can't pretend this didn't happen. It's like, nope. I wanted a null.

[Big Dick Toledo]

That church thing just gets in the way, though.

[Brady]

Oh, it was crazy. But it's. You know, he spent a lot of money and I think it ended up working out. I think he got it a no. And I don't know how. So there's no time limit on what it says. How about that?

[Brett]

And I don't. I could be wrong. But the only one I know that the annulment or the church thing could be is. Is Catholic.

[Brady]

Yeah. Catholics are the ones that play that. Well, you can. You can legally annul your marriage. Yeah.

[Brett]

And it's up to the court.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

To approve as well.

[Brady]

Huh. Well, I'd fight down that road for your 14 day marriage. Well, not even 14. We're. We're at 15 days today. And you haven't seen her since. Since Tuesday. So it was a 12 day marriage. So it's a double whammy. John. She cheated and now she's got the clap. Needs four days to clean that tr.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Maybe that's.

[Brady]

Maybe she's got a little, you know, going on and she's like, you can't see this and I'm gonna have to tell you about it because that could be. She might got a. An STD after she got pregnant with you in Thanksgiving. And then she went and got herself a Christmas candy cane that left her with the southern dribbles.

[Brett]

The bachelor party.

[Brady]

Ah, that could be. Devin could be right. This one said this guy needs to confront her today and give her an ultimatum. There's truth to that too. Why are you giving her all this time? Tell me now or the next phone call it's an annulment request to leave him hanging. Like this is even worse. Run. Forced run. I agree with that. Why are you giving her all this? Why are you giving her the whole week to sit back? And you know that to me is just coming up with a plan to lie to you.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Does he even know where she's at? Or she's just not there?

[Brady]

Didn't say that. She's banging her. She's banging his boss. Salary doubled. That horse chugging down El Patron or it's her brothers. Oh, man. And nobody's coming up with anything good. I forgot the comedian who used to say that. But whenever your significant other says the words, we need to talk, very rarely is it like, I just bought you a new house. You don't hear good news after we need to talk.

[Big Dick Toledo]

What if she's a Dude. And she's telling me she's a post op tranny. She wouldn't be able to be pregnant.

[Brady]

That's right. But I do like that theory. She's the first pregnant post op train. Or maybe she wants to be a man now. The pregnancy fired up something in her body that said, I don't want to do this because deep down I've always known I'm a man. Yeah. Our buddy that got Brady and I. Our friend that got the news, that is. Well, there wasn't a week of their marriage that. I mean, she traveled for business all the time. She was not home all the time. And every single day she could, she would, like, at the mall, just bone a dude in the, you know, bathroom. Jesus. Every chance. Every chance she had some guy look at her and say, hi, how are you? She turned it on and said, we're going to do this.

[Brett]

Did a lot of business travel.

[Brady]

Good enough, but not that good, but enough that if you were, you know, head game. Yeah. If you were at Target and some and she tapped you on the shoulder and she's like, I've been watching you and I find you very attractive. You're like, well, you'd find it complimentary.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Oh, okay.

[Brady]

So she was good enough to be like, well, thank you. That's very nice of you.

[Big Dick Toledo]

So not some pig then.

[Brady]

Now if she started to say, I would love to take this further. And the next thing you know, you're in a Target dressing room. I don't know that it's worthy of that. Okay.

[Big Dick Toledo]

All right.

[Brady]

But it was, you know, you'd be very happy that a person that looked like her told you that she was interested.

[Big Dick Toledo]

But so she got caught in a dryer. You would, you know, you'd hit that or, ah, maybe. Okay.

[Brady]

You'd also possibly walk right by.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Okay.

[Brady]

Somewhat of a couple of cocktails, business.

[Brett]

Trip at the bar.

[Brady]

Cocktails, business trip. You're definitely accidentally doing stuff and convention. Yeah.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Okay.

[Brady]

Yeah. But yeah, she was like, wedding day. Like, she broke it all down. Instead of just saying, I don't want to be here anymore. She told them everything. Caterer, we had that other dude we knew years ago who told his wife, broke down another list of, like, I've pretty much got.

[Brett]

Well, when he broke it down, he laid it on her.

[Brady]

Oh, he told 28. Yeah. Names of currents. Like, wasn't even in the past. Like, here's what's going on right now. At any given time, I can make 28 of these calls. And it's happened. I'm Starting to feel a little guilty about what?

[Big Dick Toledo]

A little.

[Brett]

And yeah, two or three are in the community.

[Brady]

But they stuck it out. They did. I don't know if it lasted, but they stuck it out.

[Brett]

No. Okay. I'm thinking of someone.

[Brady]

No, no, no. Yeah, they stuck it out for a.

[Brett]

Little while because I thought he had, you know, he had the. The new.

[Brady]

The mulligan she initially left. I don't know if it lasted. Now, there may be truth to what you're saying.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

But I know for a while she's like, we're staying still together. No, no, no, no.

[Brett]

I did.

[Brady]

I don't. I. I would have moved on and.

[Brett]

Divided the age almost in half because.

[Brady]

I remember having a talk with him about a year later of saying, she's an angel. Magic. Can't believe that she stayed with me. She stuck this out and it was like, all right. But then I have.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Did he have some cash out? Okay, well then there you go. Yes, sir.

[Brady]

Yes. Yes, sir. She was a little more tolerant than she would have been had he had, you know, a 1500 square foot apartment he shared with a friend. Right. Okay. Anyway, yeah, there's a few stories that, you know, my mom got a knock on her door once with her friend that just. That would have never known. Very pretty lady knocked on the door and said, hey, I just want to let you know, I'm telling all my friends, I'm telling everybody we're getting a divorce and I have a horrible meth problem and I'm gonna go away for a little while. Like what? Nobody would. No, she was such. And they were successful people, functional, everything. She had to break it to her husband. Everything else. Nick, as far as I know, that didn't last either. But I mean. And he also had something brewing financially that wasn't on the up and up, but crazy. Just. And they, you know, hid it from each other for 15, 16 years and then suddenly said, yeah, it's been. And she had. Like. She said, I've been pretty much only awake for the last 10 years because of cocaine. Recently found crystal meth. Loving it. Two years of that is enough. And I think I need to stop. And she was telling. It was crazy. You would have never known she could mask that like nobody's business. It crazy. So sometimes when someone says, I'm going to take the next four days off from my life and I'll get with you on Saturday morning so we can have a nice chat. Brace yourself. Nothing good coming your way, Vince, but thanks for the email and thanks for giving me Paranoia about your life. I don't even know you. You could be a complete prick. Here I am worried about you. But my. Yeah, I'm with Ben on that one. The guy who emailed.

[Brett]

It's worse.

[Brady]

Like you call her up and say, hey, that's enough. I'm not giving you four days to what's going on. To blindside me so I can sit here and have anxiety for an entire week and then get punched with one of my scenarios. Yeah, worst.

[Brett]

You answer that question yourself. Would you do that to her?

[Brady]

Sure.

[Brett]

Would you do the same thing I sit for four days or.

[Brady]

People are different. Some people would say it's a great idea. Some therapists will tell you, hey, take a break.

[Brett]

What could allow a lot. That amount and how. How would that improve delivering the news?

[Brady]

If you're bad at communicating, if you're a bad communicator and you tend not to say things properly when you're trying to communicate, it is a good idea to say, I need to gather my thoughts and take a break here or I'm going to come at you with stupid. And what I really want to do is make sure I come at you with a very smart plan of how I want my side to be heard. That isn't bad. Before five days. That's too. That's a day. Maybe just I need a day. I'm going through some stuff. I want to talk to you about something tomorrow.

[Brett]

For a debate?

[Brady]

Yeah, it kind of. Yeah. Because there are some people who are just flat stupid. Can't string a sentence together, especially if they're emotional or angry. And the next thing you know, it's an fu fight and everybody's shouting out, you know, expletives and what the. What's wrong with you? You dumb. And, you know, you start being mean to each other. She's trying to keep that, so give her credit for that. But give her a call. You don't deserve this, Vince. And then call and then immediately text us or email and tell me what happened. Huh?

[Brett]

If you're. If she's listening. Yeah, get a hold of her.

[Brady]

If you're married to Vince right now and you're holed up, it's you. There aren't two of those stories going in this city. It's you. So, yeah, call him. It's too long. We'll give you 24 hour, like cooling off period and then you're on the clock. I mean, they do that for Hamas. And Israel had to have a 24 hour cooling off period. And if a war only Needs a day for a cooling off before you start lobbing bombs again. Come on, Vince. You make the call. You're a man. You're a man. Maybe she's a lesbo John, and she's leaving him for another woman. And now that he put a baby in her, she's got all he.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Probably feel better about that.

[Brady]

Well, that's still. You could be. That would be. Yeah. The best news. Like, for me, if you wanted my opinion, the best news could be that she said she doesn't want the baby. Because you'd hear. You'd hear a Homer Simpson from me if that was like, that's it. Oh, man, you had me spinning all week long. Well, this will be simple.

[Big Dick Toledo]

If for me, it'd be like, you'd see the fireworks and drones like they. When they tore down the Tropicana up there in Vegas.

[John Holmberg]

It'd be a show.

[Brady]

It would be a little picture of like the Gerber baby floating in drones. And then the Ghostbusters thing goes over right down the center. Yeah. Oh, my God. It's like Brett's not having that baby after all. What a display. Yeah, I would be fine with that. That would be the best bad news I could get, man. But that's me you're asking me. You might want that baby. I don't understand that. That mentality doesn't exist in me. Yeah, I don't know what she could be telling you. I don't know what's going on, but four days, an awful long time to wait. So you should make that cut today. Make the call. And then later tonight when? Before you, you know, wrap a rope around your neck for whatever she tells you, email us and let us know how this goes, because I need to. I can't. You can't leave me hanging either. She's left you hanging for now. You left a whole city, Vince, by throwing that email at me.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Way to go, pal.

[Brady]

Yeah, this is your fault. Visit Homeberg's morning sickness [e-mail]. Hey, everybody, it's John Holmberg from the morning sickness talking to Shane Orlando from Orlando Auto Body. Now, Shane, I take great pride in saying I stand with someone when I tell a listener to go to their shop. I know why. You tell me what's different for a KUPD listener to go to Orlando Auto Body than anywhere else. Well, first of all, we've been in the valley here for over 34 years. We do a quality job. We work for you, not the insurance companies.

[Big Dick Toledo]

So we can work together to make.

[Brady]

Sure your Listeners are getting the customer service they deserve. If your car's been wrecked and you need that thing fixed the right way, get on over there now. Orlandoautobody.com It's Dick Toledo and new customers.

[Wayne]

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[Big Dick Toledo]

And I. She's got to be. She's got to be a smoke show for this, though. I mean, for him to put up with this. Okay, you can have the brick sister.

[Brady]

Yeah. What are you doing? I don't think he said, yeah, you can have it. I think she probably came home.

[Brett]

I just need a couple of days.

[Brady]

To an information packet that basically said, I'll talk to you Saturday. Oof. Hit the bricks. None of this is good, said John. She didn't want him to contact her. So she's probably actually boning somebody for the next four days and selling her wild oats after she got married. Either way, that dude is screwed.

[Brett]

She's having a baby.

[Brady]

Moon dude. I kind of like this dude's name. His name's William Bakehouse. Billy Bakehouse. And he signed his email. House, I don't want to make it. I don't want to. I don't want to go right turn on what we're talking about here, but I think I want to be best friends with Billy Bakehouse. This is my man House.

[Brett]

What's up, House?

[Brady]

Billy Bake House.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Jennifer, we got a woman's point of view. She said pregnancy was a lie. Oh, so she could be faking the. You know, could have.

[Brady]

But why would she do that only for four days?

[Big Dick Toledo]

I don't know this for a woman, though. So women know how women think, but.

[Brady]

They just found out that she was pregnant last Saturday. So if you're gonna lie about the pregnancy, maybe you're gonna lie about the pregnancy. Wouldn't you just lie and say, oh, it was a false pregnant, like, wouldn't you? Again, if you're gonna spill the beans seven days later, just say, ah, we were wrong. I'm not really pregnant. That sucks. Test was false negative.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah, I don't know. I just.

[Brett]

Just one day.

[Brady]

And why would I lie?

[Brett]

I'd be calling.

[Brady]

Yeah, but then. Then you get into that weirdo stage. Now you're pissing her off. There are people who do need breaks from stuff. I'm not a fan of it, but there are people who are like, I just need a break. I'm an emotional basket case.

[Big Dick Toledo]

It's one day, leaving for like the afternoon. Like, hey, I just need you out of the house for a little bit. Let me just.

[Brady]

Four days. Yeah, She's. That's selfish.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Dude is wearing Brady glasses. Deep down, he knows he's just in denial.

[Brady]

And there's some of that, too. When I read that initially, I'm like, vince, you know exactly what this news is and you're worried about it yourself.

[Brett]

Tried to tame that wildcat.

[Brady]

It's almost like the old game. So match game, where the rule was, whatever. The first thing that comes into your mind is your answer.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

You know, it's like, what's your gut telling? Immediately your answer, oh, God, that's not my baby. Probably that's what's coming your way. And then. And then you just start thinking all the other things it could be. But the first fill in the blank is usually the one that the other person's thinking too. Occasionally, it's off. There's a multiple choice thing here. But, man, that's a Poor Vince, this one.

[Big Dick Toledo]

She probably already has the abortion scheduled.

[Brady]

Okay. And she just didn't know how to tell you that she wants to get rid of the baby. That would be. To me.

[Big Dick Toledo]

She wants to get rid of Keyshawn's kid.

[Brady]

Now there's the double. Brent just added the double. That, to me would be the best possible news is that all you are is discussing the pregnancy and you can have that talk. But she didn't know how to tell you. She thought it would break your heart. So she's waiting four days and she's going to come back and go, I don't think I want to have a baby. And I know you want one, so that would be the best. Now if she's like, this could be Keyshawn's baby. We should probably delete this now. But so we don't have more problems. I think if that was the case, she would just go do it on her own and quietly pretend like the pregnancy failed.

[Big Dick Toledo]

And she may do that, though, but she still may do that when she comes Maybe that was the four day break time. Something wasn't right.

[Brady]

Yeah, maybe. She's getting advice from a friend. Says, look, if it's Keshan's baby, you just need to tell him.

[Brett]

Not taking any chances.

[Brady]

I was. I was so nervous about the pregnancy, I needed four or five days to just reset. My life has changed so much in the last few days and it scared me to death. And I didn't want to bring it to you. So we're fine. And then go eliminate Keyshawn's baby and come back and play pretend she had a miscarriage. And then stop banging Keyshawn, for God's sakes. Either way, Vince, there's a lot you need to do here.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Vince, Nash, over here.

[Brady]

Jesus. Everybody goes this route. I'm thinking it's his brother's kid from the wedding. DNA is going to be close enough, but she's trying to figure out how to tell him. If the DNA was that close, would you even bring it up? Well, the DNA is going to match if everyone's tested. It's probably going to look enough like him I can get away with this. I don't think she'd like a week later go. Unless guilt got her. What if it's the other way around and she found out something about him? Like she found dick pics from another dude in his phone and she had to run from it. Would a woman take four days on that or would she immediately start? Yeah, she'd scream and yell the first day.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Pictures of Big Mike in his phone.

[Brady]

Yeah, she wouldn't say. Yeah, Vince, email me back right now if you've got dick pics in your phone from another. If you've got a Keyshawn on your life. You guys have stories. Stories I tell you and you share them with us. My life is boring.

[Big Dick Toledo]

One of your people jumping in. Alan Nirenberg. Man, that hoe either cheating or she don't want the baby. Take the next few days and run, brother.

[Brady]

Is that MC Dreidel? What kind of language is he using?

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah, smartest yahoo.

[Brady]

Take the money and run right now. I think the what I would be doing in the next 24 hours to 48 hours coming back Saturday is talking to a lawyer about annulment. And get that paperwork ready to sign Saturday, just in case she brings Hindenburg to the party before the fire hits, you jump out and say, okay, I was expecting something horrible. So let's just first off, agree that this is all over. We're annulling this immediately and acting like this never happened. Now As a person who cares about you. Let's find out what we need to do next. But we're not married anymore. None of this is going to count. You're not getting any money. You know, again, though, maybe you've been together for like eight or nine years.

[Brett]

Yeah. Who knows?

[Brady]

You know, she's got half her money still earlier. Faster you can jump. Do it. Oh, Vince. Oh, Vince. Yeah. This one's like. Maybe the marriage and kids is just too much too fast. She's overwhelmed and we're all just jaded and cynical, but probably not. My guess is she's a hoe. That's probably true.

[Brett]

You can be overwhelmed.

[Brady]

Maybe she just got had a breakdown and there's. That's an awful lot to eat in two weeks. Marriage. You know, it hap.

[Brett]

It happens more than you think that you're talking about the marriage going out. That, you know, after you're married, you're going out and buying a house.

[Brady]

Yeah. And he's got a new job, and maybe that feels a little fragile.

[Brett]

And now you're locked in, right?

[Brady]

And now you're stuck. And now. Oh, Christ, a baby, too. Yeah, maybe she's asleep herself for the Chinese government. And it got ruined because she's pregnant. Well, that's an interesting way to think of things. She got fired from her secret job with the Chinese government because of babies. Maybe she's going to have one of those midget babies like in the movie Tiptoes. That could be. They were nervous about that, remember? Because Nancy McConaughey's great line in that movie, I am a midget. Still great. So many of you have thoughts. This is why I brought it to the party. I knew when I read it, I'm like, boy, the ghouls are gonna have a field day.

[Big Dick Toledo]

These guys want fanduel bets on it. What the odds on the over under on his scenarios.

[Brady]

This is from someone named Kiefer. Is nobody faithful anymore? Every woman I've ever met, my family included, has something on the side. Husband, boyfriend, all that stuff. I'm with Larry. Single till I die.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Larry.

[Brady]

That's called incel. Be very careful, Your brain won't work. Right. But I admire it. Because you know what? If you're afraid of it, might find it. Maybe Vince's wife is just pulling back because it's all so much you. Oh, the same thing. Cynical pricks. When my girlfriend got pregnant, she wanted to be away from me for no effing reason at all. I blamed it on the pregnancy. She kept saying she wanted space And I was saying, hey, you know, bull Mer. Because we're so happy the first days knowing she was pregnant, it was just joy. Dude should just get some strange and put the wife on the back burner. Joshua. Good option. Well, you got these four days to be free again. Why don't you go out and hose some strange? That shouldn't cause a problem. She might just come back and say, I've been wanting to surprise you, and I. I lost $100,000 in crypto. Like, oh, I'm gonna be mad at you. But that wasn't as bad as I thought it could be. She might also be doing something like that. She might have done something really dumb with money. And she's setting it all up so your brain goes down pregnancy road. You know, infidelity is the marriage over, what's going on? And maybe she just kind of squandered some money trying to do something different, and it's gone. And.

[Big Dick Toledo]

And just giving you the worst case scenario. So when you're, like, making me okay, it's not as bad.

[Brady]

And then you're like, oh, he only lost 50 grand. That's a punch in the nuts. But Jesus, I thought this and this and this evil broadcast. That's pretty evil. But it's a pretty smart move to say, make him think. Spin him for, like, five days on the worst. Like, his brain's gonna take this down terrible roads and then just go in and tell him, I spent all our savings on gambling or something. I got a problem.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Jason says if you go through with a divorce annulment, he needs to get a DNA test. Definitely doesn't need to be paying Keyshawn's child support.

[Brady]

I say, that's true for everybody who's. Whose wife says, I'm pregnant and not because you're worried it's not yours. You have to pay for it if she decides to leave. Anybody with a baby should just for no reason at all, just look at their wife today and say, I want a DNA test on the kid. Are you crazy? I am. And I want a DNA test. For what reason? Comfort for myself. Women say it all the time. I just need it for my own comfort. We never say that as men. But we should. And then just have them go. If a woman just sits back and goes, fine, waste the money. But if she had all starts stewing and hemming and han, guess what?

[Big Dick Toledo]

Four words for you, bro. Go do her sister.

[Brady]

That's four words. All right. Yeah, I was 57325 and a decadent meth user. Please don't use my name, Steven. Oh, darn it. He didn't give us his name. I'm just kidding. If it is, I apologize. I threw a fake name out. This one says, guys, the four days could be her drawing up the annulment papers. Or like you said, she's a smoke show and doesn't want to carry a baby and wreck her body. There's truth to that, too. And maybe she's like, this is too much for me.

[Big Dick Toledo]

I'll go with the smoke show, partner. You don't wreck your body. I understand.

[Brady]

All right. Please don't wreck your body like Vince. We just need a follow up from you. And I think what we've learned today is Keyshawn's busy and you should. You should know whether or not he got to you. So today, if you've got kids, just say for your own peace of mind, I'd like a DNA test with the kid. If your wife. You don't even need to do it. You just base it on the reaction of her. She gets mad at you for that she did something horrible. If she's like, you're an idiot. Go get a DNA test. Okay. My mom would have done that. Looking at my dad and my nose and our faces. And if my dad said, that's it, I don't think that one's mine. Go get 10 tests. You. Of course that's yours. Look at his nose. I'm still doing it, man. Fine. My mom wouldn't have moved. You think I had. What? Sex with a replica of you and that giant nose? You think I'm into noses or something? You idiot. That's your kid. You can tell by the horrendous features that you gave him.

[Brett]

You don't think. You know, there's doubts. Every now and then when I look up to Kirby, look up.

[Brady]

Anything that went over five, seven. For you, I'd have been like, hold on. Just two takes. I don't have the ability to. No. You know, any kid, I would test it all. Test them all, always. Women don't have to worry about that. But if they did, they'd be all over us about it. It would be a reasonable thing. It would be on MSNBC all the time. Men try to stop women from getting tests because they make us feel bad for thinking it. I would do it. I don't care if my kid was 30. You know, run a test. High five, bro. I know.

[Big Dick Toledo]

High five.

[Brady]

At the very least, I'll never have to worry. Nope. On whether or not that kid's good at basketball because of me or some sort of natural gift he was given by his real dad and I don't. I have thin lips. Where did those come from? Yeah, I don't know.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Either you were with DeAndre or Mick. Keith Richards and.

[Brady]

And Mick. Come on, that could be.

[Brett]

I thought you're saying make a rib.

[Brady]

Well, you know, hey, some of those broads will bang a McRib if. Are there McRibs in the back of the car? They're empty McRib because then it's key shots anyway. At 6:24. Good luck, Vince. Thanks for the email. I didn't know it was going to be that. That big a deal for everybody, but there's a lot of people. Oh my God, my emails are exploding. I just found Vince's wife. It's a picture of unblacked.com and just on the couch.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Can't figure out which one.

[Brady]

Yeah, you don't stand a chance. No, Vince, Lerner and Rowe are there for you. They've got an entire department for this, but horrifying. Let's get a wake up song. And maybe for Vince, maybe for the sake of Vince. 585-9800. A good one and we'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up. It's out of control now. Yes. Can you PD.