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John Holmberg
All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up north features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe Derosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here.
Brady
For the amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed right. Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it, too. And you can get rid of your pain and start saying, yes, I can to all the things you want to do. And. And all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute head there right now. The Core Institute dot com. Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Friday. It is 5:45. This is the morning sickness. My name's John. There's Brady. There's Brett. There's big Dick Toledo. And off and running on a beautiful morning as it is. It rained a little at my house yesterday, which is strange. Just kind of like three drops. I was the one, but there it was. It was kind of neat. Yeah, I was the whole show. Just this whole day just got better. Walking in the from the studio, back in there to grab a coke out of the fridge and reaching my pocket laundry money. Nothing better than a day starting off with laundry money. I can find laundry money anytime. But that was awesome. 24.
Brett
Nice.
Brady
That I didn't expect to have in my pocket. I have in my pocket. What a fine. I love laundry money. You brought it up about winter coats.
Brett
Yeah. Oh, reach in there. 20, 30 bucks.
Brady
All right. I used to intentionally put a few hundred dollars in one winter Jack. I don't wear winter jackets anymore. We don't have winter. So I put in a big coat. And you know what? That might have been a bigger reason. Like it was two, maybe three years later, I finally broke out the big coat. I reached into the pocket that was inside of it. Suits. I do that with suits. I keep a few bucks in a suit. Here's the other thing about a suit. It's a dry cleaning. You gotta dry clean a lot of times, let's be honest, for people like me, I wear a suit. Maybe I have a few, but I'll wear one and then just hang it.
Brett
Back up, just brush it off.
Brady
And we didn't do anything too sweaty or.
Dick Toledo
You gotta go to at least 10 to 15 outings.
Brady
Yeah, I think. I think, yeah. Most suits are good for at least 11 shots. I mean, what am I running in the spartan race in that thing? It's pretty. It's pretty clean. The shirt underneath.
Dick Toledo
Unless you're getting your dance on at.
Brady
A wedding, you know, I'm not gonna happen and I'm not weddings. So most of the time it's a funeral. At the worst case scenario, I'll have something spill on it. Then I got to get a dry clean. But I'll put money in the inside pockets of a suit. And then, you know, God, what, two years later, I might need that suit again. Go back in, find some dough. I was telling the boys I found a thousand bucks in my back pocket once. That's the best laundry money find of all time.
Brett
I think I'm about 40 in my leather jacket.
Brady
40, all right, nice. 40 is a good find. Just accidentally, a thousand bucks. I folded up. I was in Vegas, I had $1,000. I put it my back pocket. Changed those pants, put it in the suitcase. When I got back, I do laundry like a man. Pulled it all out of the suitcase, stuffed it in the hole. Cold. Nothing bad happens in cold water. Don't care. Everything seems clean. My whites aren't as white as they could be, but I don't care. Shoved it in there, popped it, boom. Put those pants back on. A couple of weeks later, like I'm sitting on something. Reached back there, folded water, hundreds.
Dick Toledo
El grande.
Brady
Thousand dollars. Like that's the best laundry find of all time. Nothing. Better start your Friday off.
Unnamed Speaker
My pocket.
Brady
$24.00. Twenty and four ones. That is a good find. Thank you, laundry gods. I appreciate it. Marvelous. Great start to the day. And you know who's got. Who's had a better start to the day to me? These guys. That Rudy Giuliani. Well, no, not necessarily, but yesterday I noticed that, like when a. This has been a. When you get older, you start seeing this stuff. Presidents start doing stuff Their last couple of days that are.
Unnamed Speaker
Why don't you just do that before.
Brady
2500 people with drug sentences got commuted yesterday by Biden. Just like. And he's like, oh, they're just unnecessarily long sentences. And it's like, he's got a day left. It's the weekend and then he quits. Why not just do that? That, like, why don't they ever do that on the first day they're in office? Is it because if they do it and they're one of those guys they let loose, goes crazy, it's on them.
Dick Toledo
And then they say it's going to continue with President Trump.
Brett
He'll.
Brady
What is the commuting the January 6th.
Dick Toledo
Non.
Brady
Huh?
Brett
January six people, I think.
Brady
Oh, he's got people.
Dick Toledo
But also the people that Biden's releasing on drug offenses.
Brady
Yeah. Which is going to get him again. Calling him back. Yeah. No, not so fast, brother.
Dick Toledo
No.
Brady
I hope you enjoy Judge a day.
Brett
Take backs.
Brady
Yeah, I just know, I know that they do it, but I mean, it's always the last day. They're like. And I, and I looked and I'm like, 2500 drug sentences commuted. Is Hunter in that? Is that why you did this? Hunter Biden must have had a, a pop that 2500 dudes. And then I'm like, well, what is an excessively long drug sentence? And what if you're the 2500 and first dude who had like, one year longer or less than the last guy?
Dick Toledo
You fall under that.
Brady
Yeah. There's got to be a line set and you're on the bubble. And that sucks because there's more than 2,500 dudes in jail for something dumb.
Dick Toledo
That's why I think they're saying that Trump might agree with that at this person, that he's the people that he's pardoning. There's other people that are in there.
Brady
Maybe just, okay, then just do it. Do it the whole time you're president every couple days, just go, here's some more guys I don't think should be in jail. And then what's the point of the court system? You sit back and the guy just goes, nah, you guys were all wrong. There's no reason for any jurisdictions to.
Dick Toledo
Well, you hear the court systems are all stacked.
Brady
Sure, they're stacked, but what's the point if the president then call the president. Go, we got too much on our plate. You run through these and get rid of the ones. You think you're gonna waste our time. If the courts are stacked. And then one dude can wave a magic wand and make it so we had 25 cases we didn't need a few years ago. Oh, this is stupid. Another thing that needs to end. This is for sure. President doesn't have to go visit terrible tragedies and talk to the families. He can go to it and like, tour the deal, but he doesn't owe anybody a phone call. You know, all these things are like, oh, President Biden never even maybe in war. That's about it. But natural disasters and stuff. A, not the president's fault. B, the last thing you want is cameras and some politician going really feel bad for a really bad time. Yeah, it's tough. Thanks. I had to stop everything I'm doing to say to make sure you get credit for something. President visiting your house doesn't mean a thing. What is his old ass gonna do exactly? All he's doing is making sure that nobody gives him.
Dick Toledo
They got kicked in the lottery, the disaster lottery.
Brady
Right. And if they're gonna come over to.
Dick Toledo
Your house because it's for.
Brady
That's my point, too. When you got this many people affected, you visit all of them or you visit none.
Dick Toledo
Yep.
Brady
You go to class. Yeah, Right. Either have somebody's. You bring enough for everybody, or you throw the goddamn gum away. Because I just. I watched him. Like, he hasn't even gone and visited.
Unnamed Speaker
Like, who's he?
Brady
Who do you visit?
Brett
What's he gonna do? Triple trip over Mel Gibson's burned up Oscar?
Brady
He's gonna break a hip.
Brett
What's he doing over there?
Brady
Shake Gibson's hand? You're doing a terrible job.
Unnamed Speaker
I love him. Braveheart. I'm sorry about your house. There's nothing I can do. I'm gonna leave on Monday.
Brady
I'm done.
Dick Toledo
Presents. Walking into the fire.
Brady
Yeah. Yeah. He's going towards the light. No, I just. I think that with all presence. That's not political, it's just like, all right. And then. But it's the media's fault to go. They cross their arms and tap their toes like, are you gonna go talk to the people now? Cuz if you don't, we'll make it seem like you don't care. He has to fly over there and stand in it and go, yep, Saw it. TV can show him that. If we can have Zoom meetings. The hypocrisy of it all is all these people that act like they'd be mad about it don't want to go to work either. Everybody's fighting to stay home and Zoom all their Meetings, but they want the president to fly and shake hands with 35,000 people. I just think it's a waste of time and money.
Dick Toledo
I remember we were laughing. This was years ago, but it was. It was the first time you'd seen it. I forget where. It was a disaster relief thing, but Trump got in there and just started throwing.
Brady
Yeah. He starts heaving stuff, which I don't think he knows what. He's like, I'm not gonna waste everybody's time. I remember when Kanye got mad at George Bush because he didn't visit New Orleans fast enough, and he went on TV and said, george Bush hates black people because he won't go visit them. He flew over it a couple times. I think you get the gist of a hurricane's damage from the air.
Brett
Probably better, actually.
Brady
Yeah. I was like, sometimes you feel like.
Dick Toledo
I'm gonna be in the way.
Unnamed Speaker
Of course you are.
Brady
You're a huge distraction. The media is following you around the Secret Service.
Brett
You got 20 dudes walking around with you.
Brady
It's all for show. None of it's actually authentic. He doesn't want to visit you. He has to play pretend like it matters. That.
Dick Toledo
That whole, sorry, your house got leveled. We need a quick picture.
Brady
Yeah. Why? The president visited with victims. And then what? Well, they were still victims. And he went back to this private.
Brett
Plane and got his Jacuzzi at the White House and watched the rest on Fox.
Brady
You know, the only time it would be impressive to me is if he went through and goes, not as bad as I thought. No money, like, that's the only reason to tour it. You're gonna give money either way.
Dick Toledo
Have the checks. Just start writing $770 checks.
Brady
All people want is the money, and nobody's in there just standing on the rubble of their house going, wow, I get to meet the President. This is worth it.
Brett
It'd be like Steve Martin, a jerk.
Brady
$1.97. Iron Balls McKenzie.
Unnamed Speaker
How'd you go down there? Shake hands with those idiots.
Brady
It just doesn't make sense. Yeah, you want to impress me? Go when there's no tragedy and start shaking hands with the people in the inner cities. When you're not running for any election year. Yeah, you're not running for anything. Show up and just wander the streets of South Central. You start hanging out with the homeless without cameras, without, you know, announcing. Have your Secret Service go, hey, take me over there for a little bit. I want to go talk to those guys now. I'm impressed now. Now it's something you care about.
Brett
Impressed me. Stop by, you know, south side of Chicago on a Saturday night, you know.
Brady
About 11:00 at a wedding.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady
Yeah. One of them South Chicago weddings that.
Dick Toledo
Bill Murray visitations just pop in.
Brady
Yeah. Always a shooting at one of those South Chicago weddings because somebody's mad that that lady didn't. And then there's somebody banging somebody they shouldn't be. South Chicago's got some drama and guns. Yeah. Do me that favor. Walk up and down, you know, a street with some, you know, walk up and down a street that has at least three liquor stores and a dude selling bean pies. Now you're impressing me. It's like, what happened?
Unnamed Speaker
Was there a hurricane?
Brady
No. They live every day. I want to go home. I want to go home.
Dick Toledo
President set up a tent.
Brady
Yeah. That homeless for a day.
Brett
Impress me. Go to somewhere where Furious Styles is giving a speech to Trey and Rick. Then I'll be impressed.
Unnamed Speaker
You know? You know he's gonna do is you fools right here. Never trust a white man. Never join the white man's army.
Brady
Yeah, and that's the other mafia mother.
Unnamed Speaker
It was bringing the drugs in. It's not us. Not us fools right here. It's white man.
Brady
I don't have any planes here you do. Shut up, man. Your dad Biden was giving some speech, speaking some truth. Furious Biden goes in there and starts talking to him. I would watch that.
Brett
I like that character.
Brady
I would like. Well, he used to plagiarize speeches for movies. That would be awesome if he went into South Central.
Unnamed Speaker
Hey, give me the mother country. And if like your friend Chris in a chair there.
Brady
Anyway, it says, why can't they make fake videos of presidents visiting like the one that they did of those guys on the moon. Well, David, you've made two comments there I may not be sure I agree with.
Dick Toledo
However down.
Brady
Yeah. Why can't you just fake it and appease the media? You know, I don't understand that. I don't think anybody cares who's been through that. Whether or not the president standing there talking to victims. I think him showing up and saying, wow, this is bad. There's going to be some cash came.
Dick Toledo
Down a week later.
Brady
You're going to throw money at that no matter what. Right. That's all people want. They want to know that you paid attention. Yeah. And give them like five days. You didn't show up the first day. It's like it was a mess. Did you see it? He'll just be nothing but trouble. We've seen it here. When Those jackass. When Kamala showed up and landed that dumbass plane. And I had to sit because I tried to take a shortcut by the airport, not realizing her plane was there and she was in it. That was 45 minutes of me missing some of that fall league baseball. I went early too. I'm like, we're gonna have a couple drinks. It was gonna be great. I ended up barely making it for the second inning. Cause jackass had to sit there and figure out what word salad she was gonna use.
Unnamed Speaker
Today I'm gonna sit on the tarmac. Speeches for. When you are giving speeches, you are responsible. Find all of the amazing faces, coats. It's just words that are things I see. Microphone, television, opportunity.
Brady
And I'm sitting there at the airport and they pulled us all over.
Unnamed Speaker
What's going on? She was on the other side of the airport.
Brady
Anyway, I don't want them coming. Our town. We have zoom. Now walk them around on a stick like a GoPro with Joe Biden. Squid face on a. On an iPad. And show him. Wow. It's terrible. Yeah, we can imagine a fire burned down 40,000 houses.
Unnamed Speaker
Yeah, I don't know. It's gonna look like this.
Brady
Of course you did. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com College hoops.
Larry McFeely
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Wayne
Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with Wayne.
Brady
From Amco and Wayne. Now that it's getting warmer, I turned on the AC in my car and.
Wayne
The air's blowing kind of cool, but.
Brady
It really smells like a basement. What can I do about that, Larry? Your car's AC system should be checked and serviced. Plus, replacing the cabin air filter helps the air blow strong and takes away any nasty smell. Nice.
Wayne
Is that a big deal to get done?
Brady
Not at all. It takes about an hour, and in most cases, we can do it while you wait. That's awesome. I'll say. We're Amco. Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco Double A MCO transmissions And a whole lot more.
Diane Fisher
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Michael
This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. I made a lot of poor decisions in my past that had lifelong consequences. After I was released from prison for the last time in 2014, I discovered the process to have my convictions dismissed and all of my rights restored, including my Second Amendment rights. Since achieving this for myself in 2018, our attorney has assisted over 3,000 others in doing the same. If you are still living under the consequences of past mistakes and would like to restore your rights as I have, visit restoremycivilrights.com and book a free consultation today.
Brady
Holmberg's morning sickness.
Dick Toledo
You know, what about if they make a little bit better entrance, like Air Force Ones, drops that red powder stuff and then comes in and lands, Put.
Brady
Some of that air power, dip down a bucket into a pool and help out.
Brett
They got, you know, they got Tupac on holograms now. Just throw the President out there in a hologram.
Brady
You and I both saw it. Michael Jackson's one at Cirque du Sole.
Brett
Yeah. Amazing.
Brady
Michael shows up at the end.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady
In the hologram. And it's amazing. Like, you buy it like, that's him, man. It's not that impersonator a second ago. That's the real deal. Got that green wall that they put behind it, the mask that they're all they need to do. Unbelievable. I don't want to see that anymore. But I'm sitting there like, President Biden did it. That's what he's supposed to do. Had he not done it, like, no, we don't care. It's silly and it's all going, but I don't understand the commuting of sentences. I know you can do it all the whole time, but why 2500 in the last couple of days? You've had your eye on it, evidently. Just knock those out every Friday. Just go, okay, who's in Jail that shouldn't be. And then get rid of a few. Just do it every Friday of your presidency. They only do it on elections. And then right before they're gonna leave and it's gotta be. Cause a buddy of theirs is in there and they're trying to ice that deal over and then they, then they just surround it with like 2000 goons. Make it look like it was a. I'd be pissed off if I was in jail for weed. And you're a non violent offender. But you, you know, I'm in there for a year because I, I sold some weed to like an 8 year old or something. Like ah, you jackass. You can't. 2,500 people just got a freebie for no reason.
Dick Toledo
We stocked up too much. I had a pound.
Brady
Yeah. 25 pounds. I was Nate Newton and I had a seven year old in the car. It's like I wasn't violent.
Dick Toledo
It was a great deal.
Brady
Yeah, I'm getting out because I'm stupid. But they have to do it last couple days just because I think if One of those 2,500 people decides to just go right back, nobody's going to pay attention. Ever stop visiting us. We don't care. You're an unwelcomed house guest at this point. You just muck up the freeways, you make a mess, we end up cleaning up afterwards. If there's a tragedy. If. Again if my. My rule is if Camelback Mountain gets up and starts stomping and then goes and lays back down, I don't want to see the president a couple days. I just want somebody who's. I want the insurance company to give me a check like ASAP as soon as. And a proper check too. Not one of those. Let me get out of this. Talking to Tripp yesterday about that and says insurance and all that. They want to get this over with already. So he's got insurance in the. And this LA stuff. It's already. They're like, all right, give us a list. We'll give you a check by like Monday. I'm like, wow, it's harder to get your windshield replaced, you guys. Yeah, you guys are just trying to churn out money. So you got to be watching that because they'll. My insurance. When I got hit by that kid, that 16 year old kid hit my car and I wasn't paying attention to my emails and I didn't even know I was in it for a settlement. I didn't, I didn't fill out any papers and I get a Letter that says, all right, this is our final offer. We, you know, if you want to go to court, fine. It was kind of a tersely written like an fu. You're right. All right, Mr. Negotiator. And I'm like, huh? And they evidently sent me like seven or eight different offers, and me ignoring them sent them through the moon. So I get this last one. All right, that's enough. Here's your final offer. Final offer. One of the first was this Howie Mandela checks or what Dealer, no deal with the Progressive. And I didn't even know it. And I looked top dollar. So I went back and I just searched that insurance company. I don't know, it was like independent something. And I searched and there were like eight emails from the last year. And the first one was like, for 2,000 bucks, I would have ignored that for sure. And the next few were more and more and more.
Unnamed Speaker
And the next thing you know, we're.
Brady
Starting to push around 20 grand. I haven't said a word. I'm not in pain. I'm fine. I'm like, all right, all right, tough guy. You want to play hardball, huh? Like, huh, me? All right, fine. Solid tactics, Mr. Holmberg. Yeah. What did I do here?
Dick Toledo
There's eight of you around my coffee table.
Brady
So my dad said, I told him you just offered me a bunch of money for that truck. Are you hurt? I'm like, I don't know. I. Oddly enough, one of my shoulders went real bad after that wreck. Ended up getting that replaced.
Unnamed Speaker
Whatever.
Brady
Not related. I would have felt bad scamming the system. Probably accelerated. I got hit pretty good. But he said, should have just held out. I'm like, you know what? You're probably right, because I got real excited at the number, and I emailed back. I'm like, this is good. Finally, we broke him. Like, I didn't even know we were negotiating. I had no idea. Insurance companies are weirdos.
Brett
They just want off their.
Brady
Yeah, they wanted off their books, and they. Yeah, but they threatened to. They're. All right, well, fine. We'll take it. We'll take it to court. You son of a bitch. I didn't know we were playing the game, to be honest with you. I guess I just had a bat in my hand and didn't know there was a game going on. So I don't know. That's all people want. They just want their stuff back. They don't want them.
Dick Toledo
There's all, you know, the questions were asked, like, okay, so they cover your house. What happens in that one to three year period where you're not living in your house. How does that work?
Brady
God knows. A mess. So the last thing you want is the Crypt Keeper knocking on where your door used to be.
Unnamed Speaker
I just came by, see how you're doing.
Brady
Oh, great. That's where my bedroom was. This is where my kitchen was. I live in a Motel 6 now. I.
Unnamed Speaker
That sounds terrible, but I have to visit. People yell at me. So goodbye.
Brett
Grab a goddamn broom.
Brady
Yeah, start sweeping up on me.
Unnamed Speaker
I don't know, just come by. TV camera films me making. Making sad face at you.
Brady
And then I leave. Thanks.
Unnamed Speaker
We're gonna give him money, give him all the support they need.
Brady
And then they're like, I did his job. I just think that's a.
Dick Toledo
That's why they dropped off the trailers here in some of those.
Brady
The President's not doing it.
Unnamed Speaker
They were gonna do that anyway.
Brady
He just has to do it.
Dick Toledo
He could drop one off.
Brady
All you have to do is say, how much do you need? And I don't trust that anybody can walk around an entire burned down neighborhood who's not in the business of assessing value and go, 40 billion. Like he doesn't know the numbers. Like, yeah, it's a lot of. You could have shown me this on tv. This is sad. I don't want to meet these people. The last thing I like, like. I don't even like going to funerals. You go to a funeral and you see the sad family, you're supposed to go over and go, I'm so sorry. I don't want to approach them. They're going through something.
Dick Toledo
I don't know what to say.
Brady
Yeah, I just, eh. Sorry about all that.
Dick Toledo
Thanks for having me.
Brady
Seems brutal.
Brett
The spread's pretty solid though.
Brady
Yeah.
Dick Toledo
Yeah, that's. That's always good to compliment that.
Unnamed Speaker
Where are the pinwheels? I have to ask.
Brady
That's have wanted.
Unnamed Speaker
I'm gonna eat two for him.
Brady
The pinwheels are over there.
Unnamed Speaker
Subway.
Brady
All right, well, I guess you guys haven't gotten to the will yet.
Unnamed Speaker
And we're gonna go to Buck and Rider.
Brady
This place sucks.
Dick Toledo
I'm so sorry for loss. Here's a bogo coupon.
Brady
Yeah, he would like that.
Brett
You're gonna Charlie him a coupon?
Unnamed Speaker
I wouldn't get one free. And you know, if you ever find.
Brady
Another date because you're solo now.
Unnamed Speaker
Sorry for your loss, but. And if you want that bogo to go to a guy who really appreciate.
Brady
It, you're looking at him. Yeah, I don't like doing that. I don't like talking to people in grief. I'll go up and say, hey, I hope everything's all right. I don't know what to say. I always think I'm gonna make them feel worse.
Brett
They say the wrong thing.
Brady
It's like the thing I'm always good at is saying, I have no idea what to say. That falls out of my mouth. I said it to Tripp when he's going through his time like I have. I don't have words for this. I just want to make sure you're doing okay. Otherwise, I can't. And then I usually say something like, this just sucks. You're going through a nightmare. Then I remind them of their misery, and I stand in there and I stare at them until it's awkward. Nobody ever says goodbye, and you just leave. Some stranger rolling in. Biden coming by. I remember that Wolf Blitzer standing on top of that lady's house. That was my favorite moment on CNN ever. Standing next to some lady on a rubble. Do you mind if we talked to you for a second? It's like, sure. What happened here? Oh, remember the tornado you guys wouldn't shut up about? That's what happened here. The whole reason you're here. You dumb. Oh, right. He goes to this lady and he says, you're still alive, though, and your kids and everything. Yeah. And she's literally standing on sticks that used to be her house. She goes, yep. And he goes, I guess you can thank God for that. She goes, I'm an atheist. Yeah, okay, we'll go back to the street. He did not like that. He wanted some. He wanted her to get all emotional and godly with him. Get off my house, jackass.
Dick Toledo
He probably blames it on his producer. Get me someone that'll talk.
Brady
If I did, if I did believe in God, I'd be pretty pissed off that I'm standing on a pile of toothpicks that used to be my living room. CNN reporter test Wolflist. We'll be right back. There's no reason to visit that stuff.
Dick Toledo
Or they find in the rubble the family heirloom. Hey, could you guys do that again?
Brady
Yeah.
Dick Toledo
Put that down.
Brady
I want to see you crying. You found your daughter's bones? She is her shoe in her foot.
Unnamed Speaker
The lamb beam's too heavy. I can't get her out from under.
Brady
She rolled up.
Unnamed Speaker
You understand? You found your daughter. Let's take a look at that. Maybe I whip up a few tears out of my Deliverance face.
Brady
Yeah. I think when Trump was at that one thing Started moving stuff. Here's a dead one. Let me get this. It's under these things. I found a dead body. I did my part. I'm a good man.
Brett
Ever get used to that smell?
Brady
You never ever get used to that smell. That's my nom. Which I would have dodged anyway. Just weird. I'm just watching all this and I'm like, well, whenever president leaves, I always find it fascinating that they scorch earth before and then have the nerve to go on and talk about how much they love the United States and they care about the judicial process, and then they just scorch everything. It's like, throw all the rules away, cuz they've got that power. I mean, if I'm one of the 2,500 that got set free, I'm thrilled. But you're the president. If you disagree with long sentences for nonviolent drug offenses, just get rid of the law. Make it so it doesn't happen anymore. Don't just free 2,500 random. And then, you know, you probably got another 2500 sitting there going, whoa, hold on.
Unnamed Speaker
Sorry, I couldn't get to all of you. I started off with first 2500. I was a lottery.
Brett
And does he go through this thing case by case? How does he pick out the 2500?
Brady
No friends. It's friends.
Unnamed Speaker
I know.
Brett
That's.
Dick Toledo
That's 5000. Let's do half.
Brady
Well, you don't even do that. Probably half of his staff's like, I got a cousin. I just like, all right, give me.
Unnamed Speaker
A list of people you want taken out of jail. I'll do it.
Brady
You got till noon tomorrow. And then, you know, that's how many get in the box. And then he just shakes it and he draws names.
Dick Toledo
And the last thing, don't touch Tick Tock.
Brady
That's the other thing. Tick Tock's going away this weekend. And then this worst Chinese things taking its place. And everybody's already jumping to it, but it won't.
Dick Toledo
It sounds like it's not gonna happen.
Brady
Red Note.
Dick Toledo
No, the Tick Tock.
Brady
Oh, if it doesn't, Red Note's already like, hey, we're Red Note. You ready? And rednote is more Chinese. And actually rednote is a reference. It's worse. Rednote will ban you if you say anything bad about China. They'll delete it on the fly. So they're watching everything. It's 10 times more Chinese than TikTok has been. And people are like, oh, thank God, I've got my TikTok. I'll go to RedNote. And you're doing this. It's another Chinese company that's just data mining. The first, this one lady was on news yesterday and I don't know if it was real or not. She might be just talking to, you know, make us feel bad about China. But she said I went on red note to get off my TikTok. As I saw the end was near for TikTok. So I switched and the second I posted something, I had like 18 calls. They'd already sold my phone number and information to like 30 different things. My phone was ringing off the hook. I'm getting texts from all over the place. Yeah, it's rednote is actually a reference to. Was it Mao's red book, which is a communist thing. Like it's. I don't even know what it means but red. Red notes. A note in his red book for communist. I don't know how true it is, but it just seems like if we're dumping one, we got to dump them both. But the new names. Yeah. The new Chinese company pops up and it's going to fic fact.
Brett
Oh, easier.
Brady
Is that the one?
Brett
I think that's something like.
Brady
That's the one you need to go to. That's. I'll find it here. Hang on. Visit homeworks morning sickness online at 98kupd.com.
Wayne
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Brady
I think that's the replacement for TikTok that I really think is proper. Meathead sent it to me from Prestige Billiards. He Kevin, where you at, Kevin?
Dick Toledo
He's jumping on it early.
Brady
Which is just TikTok the way you've actually always wanted it. Now imagine all those girls doing those dances and lip syncs. Only then afterwards they start boning something. They do it naked and they're dirty. Yeah. Put it in fic fap. I don't care if that's China. I don't care if that's Al Qaeda. It was worth it. I spent about five minutes on. And Kevin sent me his link. So I don't know if he's got, you know, I don't know if he's got a history. He could see what I was searching out, but I found some weird stuff on there, and I enjoyed about my. My 20, 25 minutes. I got lost on fic. Fap. Worth it. Never wanted to go on TikTok. Because I always feel bad that whatever I'm looking at, A, I know she's not gonna get naked, and B, she's somewhere between 16 and 30. And I'm feeling a little weird. Sometimes I don't like looking at the, you know, the dancing girls and thinking, wow, she's hot. And then, like, I did that Natalie Grace girl, searching out Natalia Grace, I found Natalie Grace. I'm like, geez, she's beautiful. And she's modeling. Thong bikini, you know, beach wear. Like, wow, what a body. And then the one of her pictures is her celebrating her 16th birthday last year. I'm like, well, I gotta go. That was 20 minutes I'm gonna go to jail for.
Brett
Who'd we find last week? That video we were watching. New releases.
Brady
Oh, yeah, yeah, that.
Brett
I'm not gonna try to pronounce the name, but.
Brady
Oh, the Polish chick. Yes.
Brett
Yeah, that's it.
Brady
And she's dancing around in school girl class, and you're like, not sure. And then what'd we do? We. She's like, 27. Oh, thank God. This boner is justified. Justified Boner is a good band name, by the way. Justified Boner. Legal Boner. Justified Boner. Anyway, I hope your house doesn't fall down. And if it does, evidently the plus on that is you get to meet the current president.
Unnamed Speaker
I just thought I'd come by and take a look at your house. What, do you have a problem with a wolf or. Big bad wolf? You should have built this thing on a Brexit.
Brady
Yeah. Now, in hindsight, you're right. We should have built it out of bricks. You prick. Get off my sticks.
Brett
I was a present.
Unnamed Speaker
Go to the hay house. I saw a hay house, got blown down. Now this stick house going on, there's a brick house all standing up.
Brett
I'd be sending a vice president out there. This is my last couple days. I'm enjoying the time in the White House. Kamala, get your ass. Your loser ass out there.
Brady
He spent four months on the beach while he was good president. The last couple days, he's doing stuff. No, no, no, no. Yeah, send the broad out for a few items. Yeah, we're gonna piss people off and.
Unnamed Speaker
Go out there and start mumbling. People rather hear me talk than you. You're crazy.
Brett
Talking about the economy.
Unnamed Speaker
Yeah.
Dick Toledo
Building opportunity.
Unnamed Speaker
It's gonna have. We have a real building opportunity. All these flattened houses.
Brady
Oh, she's losing it.
Unnamed Speaker
This is great. I didn't have to do that.
Brady
Yeah, I have my feet on the Resolute desk, not doing nothing, watching everybody clean out my office.
Brett
What are they gonna do, fire you? You're already gone.
Brady
You're 90. Also, you got, like, eight months.
Dick Toledo
Yeah, in the last couple of weeks.
Brett
He's got a kegger he can do this weekend. You know, he's out on Monday. What's the difference?
Unnamed Speaker
I go higher this weekend. I'm gonna do so much cocaine, you make your head spin. And we're gonna fly over to California on cocaine and walk around that hellscape. Let's take a look, try to find dragons.
Dick Toledo
Anyway, I just want attending on Monday. I think everyone else can't make it.
Brady
And we all tip our caps like it mattered to us because we. We make them. Check those boxes. You gotta go visit the horrible thing. You gotta shake hands with a few crying people. No, you don't. That's dumb. The taking too long to go visit victims. Nobody cares. Now I want somebody to show up that goes, I'm gonna get you a check by Tuesday. I want one of Brett's people to. I want a G of or whatever his name is to show up.
Unnamed Speaker
And I'm staying at a problem with a house. We can get that thing built in no time. You just touch, you know, sidle up to us.
Brady
You got it.
Dick Toledo
Whoever's getting me a house, thank you, Mr. Bananas.
Brady
Yeah, yeah, I want the Bananas to come by.
Unnamed Speaker
Oh, my God.
Brady
I can't believe this is going on right now. What do you need from me? It's like, why we're in here with Adam Ray the Rock. Text him and said, hey, brother, I hope everything's okay. Anything is bad, you let me know and I'll get you anything. I'm like, the Rock just talked. Your house, we just had. Your house is gone. You had super bowl tickets, Your collection of Tiffany, you know, jewelry's gone, your Rolex collections out, everything. And you need help from the Rock. He'll write your check. He basically told Adam Ray, you got a house to stay in if you want and anything you need. And, like, give me a million dollars in one of your houses. Works for me.
Unnamed Speaker
I can't do that for you. It's terrible.
Brett
Meanwhile, Adam raced in an Airbnb here at the Rocks pad.
Brady
What are you doing Airbnb up the road? The Rock just said you need a place to stay. We're leaving the Airbnb? Yeah. Yeah. Everything burned. My $10 million home in ashes. All my personal belongings I've gathered over the years. Family heirlooms, photos, irreplaceable. Biden hands me a check for 770. We're even. You're just pissing people off. Hey, stop cleaning up for a second. Joe Biden's shuffling through the ashes. Says, where was Trump when Porkopolis closed? God damn it. That was tragic to Brady. Shouldn't have had to gone through that disaster alone. It's true. Wouldn't that be awesome? Is as you shut the lights and you're locking the door for the last time, putting that bike chain over the doors. Pretty tough day. He's just right behind you. Oh, my God. Brady. A lot of people say your pork wasn't very good. I say different. I loved it. I loved it a lot. But you have to close. And I'm here to just say, what a tragedy. What a tragedy.
Brett
Takes you for a McRib.
Brady
Yeah. Now here's Joe Bananas. He can make this all go away like a hurricane blew right over just you. Anyway, not a liking. I just. I. I always like to watch the ends. This is like my. I don't know how many presidents in my life have come and gone at this point, but the last few days of all of them are like, whoa, you just did something you could have done, like the whole time. Like those 2,500 guys getting out. I'm sure they're happy, but they've been in there his whole sentence. He could have done this at any time, but at the end, he's like, oh, by the way, I thought your sentences were unfair. So you guys can go.
Dick Toledo
I wonder if they're told that when they're going in. Good chance, maybe in three years.
Brady
Well, we make it. We make it seem like it's just random. Joe's. Yeah, it's friends of friends. It's. It's deals and like, you know, people who spilled the beans. Rats. A lot of rats got out. You know, government moles and things like that. They.
Dick Toledo
Each one of them has three or four cases. Hey, it's a.
Brady
And they just made the one about drugs. We'll get them out. It's due to reframed who, you know, came around none of it's legitimate, like, like Raul from Maryvale who got seven years for having two pounds of pot in his car. And it was his fifth time doing it. He's non violent, but they're like, he's not getting out.
Brett
I know they all do their releases and everything else, but this one. And maybe it's just me, but this one seems like it's a lot more than normal. I don't know if it's true, but.
Brady
They all do it. Clinton did like a jillion. Really?
Brett
Okay.
Dick Toledo
It was a different deal, but I, I remember, I think it was last week. They were talking about some of the guys at Gitmo or whatever. They've been there for 33 years.
Brady
Yeah.
Dick Toledo
All right. We got nothing.
Brady
Well, they just done. Yeah, yeah. It's also stupid. So just get rid of the law. If it's. If it's that big a deal, if it's that legitimate, like, ah, we can't. We can't. No longer than like six months in jail for a non violent drug possession offense. I'm fine with that. Now they let these losers back on the streets and kill themselves with all that fentanyl everybody keeps talking about. They're eventually going to do themselves in. President Holmberg's had that rule for a long time. Legalize all that crap. And nothing about the law keeping me off of heroin. Nothing about the law. I'm not sitting here right now saying, boy, if it wasn't illegal, I'd be doing heroin all the time. But you know the law. Heroin, people are going to do heroin. It's just going to be that way. If you've got a propensity to go grab heroin, you're gonna go grab heroin. Passing laws and throwing you in jail, that's never stopped anybody from heroin. So let them all have it.
Dick Toledo
I just wonder like, you know, if it's not heroin, you know, the big, the bigger thing is the fentanyl deal and.
Brady
Yeah.
Dick Toledo
Which is.
Brady
I've said that for years.
Dick Toledo
The oxy plague.
Brady
That's their fault. Look, then don't do heroin. We have the stupid hiker law. If you put yourself in harm's way and somebody's got to come help you, you're paying for it. Right? Same thing with heroin. You decide to start firing that stuff into your veins, I'm not gonna put you in jail. It's on you. No, we're not gonna administer any help for you. You've been doing heroin? Yep. I hope you've got an arcan, because I'm leaving. And that would stop people from doing it. If they're like, oh, there's no help for heroin. Like, the bills are ridiculous, and we don't have any money anyway. Well, then stop doing heroin. No law passed. Makes heroin real. Like, geez, okay, we'll do it. It's. It's not. It's not.
Dick Toledo
If it's legalized, right? If it's that Safeway homeless population go up all of a sudden, hugely.
Brady
Look, mayonnaise is legal, and I don't want that in my system either. That stuff's garbage, so I don't do it. Same with heroin. If I was walking through the fries near the aisle of heroin, I'd be like, I don't get any. I don't want any of this. This. I don't want any of that. So I just skip right through. If other people want to do it, fine. I think it should also be legal to knock someone out who's on heroin. Like, that would be fun. Like, a non heroin person could just knock out a heroin person. Like, when I'm riding my bike and sometimes I'm on the west side and they're in those tunnels onto the roads, I should be allowed to just, like, run them over and you put yourself there. I shouldn't have to worry about it. My day should not be impeded by anybody who's decided to do heroin. Just stop it.
Unnamed Speaker
You're addicted.
Brady
Yeah, but if you never started, you wouldn't be. So stop. It has nothing to do with the law. So legalize all of it, and the people who want to do it will.
Unnamed Speaker
Eventually weed themselves out.
Brady
That's terrible, right?
Unnamed Speaker
And my son's on heroin.
Brady
Bad job. You did a bad job. We are blaming me. Yeah. Your son's on heroin. You said it yourself. That's your fault. You did that. Oh, it was his friends, right? That's your job. Also make sure his friends don't suck. My dad wouldn't let me hang out with a kid named Jim Rich because he was, you know, trouble. And you're gonna end up in jail if you hang out with that guy. I'm like, okay. So I got nervous, and I'd get in trouble every time I was hanging out with bad people. So it's. My dad did a good job of keeping me out of that. My mom told me I'd have a heart attack because I had a heart condition if I ever did cocaine or anything that accelerated my heart. She lied to me and made me feel like my heart was susceptible to problems with drugs. Scared me to death. Good. Good mom. And right there, a proper lie.
Dick Toledo
That's an episode or two.
Brady
Well, that was. Yeah. Caffeine. Well, that was legitimately me just doing too much caffeine. But again, that was my own doing. But she told me when I was a kid, like, yeah, you have a little heart palpitation. Your heart's. All it was, was I had an arrhythmia, and they just put me on some medicine for 30 days. My heart went back. But she used that, like, oh, you have a weak heart. My. I do. Yes, very. And if you ever try cocaine or you know, any of those drugs, you'll die. It'll kill you that day. I'm like, oof, that's no good. Right? So I've always had this in the back of my head. I go to the doctor, and they're like, your heart's healthy. Your amazing heart. Like, you have a heart of a teenager. I'm like, yeah, well, that's good, because it recovered from my horrible, horrible childhood heart disease. And I talked to my mom about it. She goes, I ain't never had a heart problem. I just didn't want you to do coke. That's good momming right there. My son died of.
Unnamed Speaker
He had tons of heroin in his system.
Brady
Sorry you were a bad mom. Oh, why do you do that? I'm not the one with the dead heroin kid. That's you. Not my fault.
Unnamed Speaker
No, you're a horrible person, and you're.
Brady
A horrible mom, and we're even. See ya. Yeah, make it all legal so we don't have to deal with this stuff. I think. And Kirby's just all of a sudden gonna walk down the circle K and go, I think I'm gonna try heroin today. It's legal. Or have you done a good enough job to make her think? Like, that's probably a problem.
Dick Toledo
She did it once.
Brady
She's tried the H. All kids do it now. It's Gilbert. Nothing else to do. Let's get a wake up song this beautiful Friday where we got laundry money in our pockets. It's great way to kick it off. You call us 585-9800 and tell us immediately what song you want to wake up with, and we'll try to play it for you. It's 98Kp. Wake up. It's out of control now.
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: January 17, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Guests: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Release Date: January 17, 2025
The episode kicks off with a lighthearted discussion about the unexpected joys of finding money hidden in clothing pockets. The hosts share personal anecdotes and strategies for maximizing these spontaneous financial finds.
Brady Bogen recounts a serendipitous moment:
“I found laundry money anytime. But that was awesome.” [00:31]
Dick Toledo shares an impressive find:
“Thousand dollars. Like that's the best laundry find of all time.” [03:49]
The conversation highlights the thrill of discovering forgotten cash in suits and jackets, emphasizing the unpredictability and occasional fortune associated with everyday laundry routines.
A significant portion of the episode delves into President Biden's recent actions regarding pardons and commutations, sparking a heated debate among the hosts about their timing, fairness, and implications.
Brady Bogen critiques the timing of the pardons:
“Why not just do that on the first day they're in office?... Why don't they ever do that on the first day they're in office?” [04:29]
Discussing the scale, Brady mentions:
“2500 people with drug sentences got commuted yesterday by Biden.” [04:28]
Dick Toledo adds context:
“He's pardoning the people that he's the people that he's pardoning. There's other people that are in there.” [05:55]
Brady questions the process:
“They just have to do it every Friday of your presidency. And then right before they're gonna leave...” [16:07]
The hosts express skepticism about the randomness and volume of the commutations, questioning whether they address systemic issues or serve political motivations. They debate whether this approach effectively remedies injustices in the judicial system or merely offers superficial fixes.
The discussion shifts to the role of the President in disaster response, with the hosts questioning the authenticity and effectiveness of such visits.
Brady Bogen asserts:
“There's no reason if the president visiting your house doesn't mean a thing.” [06:10]
Dick Toledo sarcastically comments on the selection process:
“They got kicked in the lottery, the disaster lottery.” [07:14]
Brady critiques the performative aspect:
“It's all for show. None of it's actually authentic. He doesn't want to visit you.” [09:06]
The hosts argue that presidential visits often serve more as media spectacles than genuine attempts to assist victims. They suggest that instead of symbolic gestures, tangible support and prompt financial aid would be more beneficial to those affected by disasters.
As TikTok's future becomes uncertain, the conversation explores potential replacements and the associated privacy implications.
Brady Bogen discusses the emergence of alternatives:
“Red Note is already like, hey, we're Red Note. You ready?... Rednote will ban you if you say anything bad about China.” [26:50]
Brett Vesely weighs in on privacy:
“They close everything. You could have shown me this on TV. This is sad.” [34:22]
Brady warns about data mining:
“Rednote is just another Chinese company that's just data mining.” [27:01]
The hosts express concern that replacements like Red Note may exacerbate existing privacy issues, drawing parallels to TikTok's data practices. They caution listeners about the potential for increased surveillance and data exploitation under new platforms, emphasizing the need for vigilance in protecting personal information.
Brady Bogen:
“I didn't expect to have [money] in my pocket. What a fine.” [01:49]
Dick Toledo:
“All right, we've done it. Joe's just here for show.” [34:59]
Brett Vesely:
“What's he gonna do? Triple trip over Mel Gibson's burned up Oscar?” [07:45]
Brady Bogen:
“We make it seem like it's just random. Joe's friends of friends.” [35:55]
In this episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness, the hosts navigate through a blend of humorous personal stories and critical discussions on pressing political and technological issues. From the simple delight of finding money in laundry to deep dives into presidential policies and the future of social media, the conversation offers a multifaceted look at contemporary Arizona life and beyond. The episode underscores the show's commitment to entertaining and provoking thoughtful discourse among its listeners.
For more insights and entertainment, tune in to Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD weekdays from 5:30 AM to 10:00 AM or visit www.98kupd.com.