01-21-25 - BR - TUE - Emailer Is Done Holding Things For His Woman Who Doesn't Have Pockets - Study Finds Contagious Urination Is A Thing - Wisc Teen Lit Senator's Office On Fire Over TikTok Ban - We Just Found Out We Can Buy Used Firetrucks

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode: January 21, 2025 Host: John Holmberg | Hubbard Radio (98 KUPD)

Summary

In the January 21, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness on Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, host John Holmberg, alongside co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo, delves into a mix of humorous banter, insightful discussions, and intriguing news segments. The episode is structured around four main topics:

1. Fashion Faux Pas: The Pockets Predicament
2. Contagious Urination: A Peculiar Phenomenon
3. Wisconsin Teen's Fiery Protest Against TikTok Ban
4. The Rising Trend of Purchasing Used Firetrucks

---

1. Fashion Faux Pas: The Pockets Predicament

The episode kicks off with a humorous take on modern fashion, particularly focusing on the inconvenience of pants without pockets. The hosts engage in a lively discussion about the frustrations of not having adequate storage space in women’s clothing.

Notable Quotes:

• Brady Bogen [04:00]: “You're the one who bought pants without pockets. I'm not holding anything for you, but I don't want lumps in my pants. Then you should have bought pants with pockets.”
• Dick Toledo [04:22]: “They've taken casual too far, too. As a guy who's taken many hits from women about wearing cargo shorts, your yoga pants are called saddlebags now.”

Discussion Highlights:

• Brady expresses his frustration with women not having pockets, joking about the need to hold items like chapstick to avoid discomfort.
• Dick adds to the conversation by highlighting how casual fashion has evolved, referencing the mockery of cargo shorts and yoga pants.

---

2. Contagious Urination: A Peculiar Phenomenon

Transitioning to a more scientific topic, the hosts discuss a recent study on contagious urination observed in chimpanzees, with implications it might have on human behavior.

Notable Quotes:

• Brady Bogen [17:10]: “Great band name. Great band name.”
• Unknown Speaker [17:25]: “They watched 20 chimps for more than 600 hours at a zoo in Japan and tracked how often they peed within 60 seconds of each other. Turned out it happened a lot.”

Discussion Highlights:

• The study from Japan observed chimpanzees and found that urination can be contagious within their social groups, especially following the lead of dominant individuals.
• Brady humorously likens this behavior to human scenarios, such as feeling compelled to urinate after someone else does, especially in social settings.
• The hosts debate whether this behavior is for marking territory or strengthening social bonds, drawing parallels to human bathroom habits.

---

3. Wisconsin Teen's Fiery Protest Against TikTok Ban

A dramatic segment covers a Wisconsin teenager who attempted to burn down a congressman's office in protest of TikTok's temporary shutdown.

Notable Quotes:

• Unknown Speaker [19:03]: “This 19-year-old kid from Wisconsin is facing charges after he tried to burn down his congressman's office. He told the cops it was because he was upset TikTok was going away.”
• Brady Bogen [20:05]: “Tick Tock's back and you're all right.”

Discussion Highlights:

• Dick Toledo clarifies the location and motives behind the incident, emphasizing the senator’s stance against TikTok.
• The hosts explore the repercussions of the TikTok ban, highlighting the extreme measures taken by the teenager as a form of protest.
• Brady sarcastically comments on the fleeting nature of the TikTok outage and its impact on younger demographics, suggesting alternative platforms.

---

4. The Rising Trend of Purchasing Used Firetrucks

In an unexpected twist, the episode delves into the peculiar trend of individuals purchasing used firetrucks, exploring the reasons behind this growing interest.

Notable Quotes:

• Brady Bogen [22:15]: “You can buy a fire truck? Sure. Retired fire trucks. Absolutely.”
• Unknown Speaker [24:07]: “You can buy them on Facebook Marketplace too.”

Discussion Highlights:

• The hosts discuss how used firetrucks are being bought for various purposes, from personal use to participation in events like Burning Man.
• Brady expresses his fascination with owning a firetruck, detailing the features and potential uses, albeit humorously highlighting the impracticalities.
• Dick Toledo provides insights into the costs and logistics of purchasing and maintaining a used firetruck, noting prices can range from $10,000 to $200,000 depending on the model and condition.
• The conversation touches on the practical challenges of owning such a vehicle, including parking, legality, and functionality in everyday scenarios.

---

Additional Highlights

• Brady's Commentary on Women's Fashion: Beyond pockets, Brady humorously critiques women's use of lip plumping products and the societal expectations placed on their attire.

  Notable Quotes:

  • Brady Bogen [03:24]: “They can see it. We know when you plump up lips unnaturally, we see it.”

• Brady Report – Unique News Segments:

  • National Hugging Day: Discusses the Netherlands' positivity campaign encouraging no complaints for 30 days.

    Notable Quotes:

    • Brady Bogen [12:24]: “That's like dry January, only it's more like C word January.”

  • Public Domain Characters: Explores the implications of iconic characters like Popeye and Batman entering the public domain, allowing for new creative uses without licensing fees.

    Notable Quotes:

    • Brady Bogen [09:48]: “So it's all the original versions. You and I could write a movie and use them as characters without paying Disney or Marvel.”

• Listener Engagement and Comedy Bits:

  • The hosts share amusing anecdotes and fictional scenarios, such as attempting to be heroes with a firetruck or dealing with absurd accidents.

    Notable Quotes:

    • Brady Bogen [35:33]: “Sir, help us.”
    • Dick Toledo [41:24]: “They’re modifying the MRAP to civilian.”

---

Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully blends humor with thought-provoking discussions. From the trivial woes of modern fashion to the bizarre trend of buying used firetrucks, and from scientific studies on animal behavior to the extreme actions of a distressed teenager, the show offers a diverse range of topics that entertain and inform listeners. Notable for its engaging dialogue and insightful commentary, the episode ensures that both regular listeners and newcomers find something of interest, all while maintaining the show's signature irreverent charm.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up North features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe Derosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here for.

[Brady]

The amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed right? Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it too. And you can get rid of your pain and start saying yes, I can to all the things you want to do.

[Dick Toledo]

And.

[Brady]

And all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute head there right now. The Core Institute.com youm thought that was funny? Goldenberg's morning sickness. You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[Unknown]

What the hell is wrong with you?

[Brady]

The other thing we didn't talk about yet and we'll get to it right now. Jeff Bezos, you are my God. You got your wife to show up to the inaugural presentation and she forgot her shirt. She just had a hot lace bra on and a white coat and she kept adjusting it. And there's a picture of Mark Zuckerberg right now throwing eyeballs down the front of her shirt. Cuz that's just not fair. You can freeze frame any guy's gonna look at that. She wanted him looked at. You can't wear a lace bra outside. It's a Seinfeld episode with the the heir to the O. Henry fortune. She walking around with just a bra and that's flaunting the norms of society. But she looked like she's. You know what she looked like? A girl that gets it. I'm dating a billionaire. I've got one job. All I have to do is look the part, smile and laugh on time and just be engaging and nice. I'd have a set of cans put in better than hers and wear that bra everywhere. If Bezos wanted to date me, she's dating a billionaire and she looks like it. Her job is to keep it tight because there's no chance she can compete with him. If she pulled her equal billion in, he'd have to do the same thing. He's pulling his weight with. The billion she's pulling her weight with. Holy cow. Keep it tight. Now she's getting a little weird with the lips. And that's one thing I think ladies, as they age, think makes them look younger. Speaking from a guy's perspective, Bubble those lips up a little too much, you start looking crazy. Let me tell white women this. This is a white woman thing. You know how white women. You know how you guys look at Mexican ladies when they draw their eyebrows on and you start laughing at them? That's what everybody does to you when you bubble your lips. We can see it. We know when you plump up lips unnaturally, we see it. And it makes you look like those crazy cholas that have those tattoos in the middle of their forehead that make them look perennially surprised.

[Unknown]

Now they got that. The lip balm, you can just do it.

[Brady]

That's supposed to. You know, that's like. That's like some sort of.

[Unknown]

What it's called.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's like something that makes lump or something. I think it's venom. And it makes you swell.

[Unknown]

Yeah, you just put it on like.

[Brady]

Chapstick and you swell. Yeah, that was pretty great. Another email that came in said, john, about the shoes. You couldn't be more right. You made a poor choice in shoes. That's not my problem. A guy says, here's another thing I'd like to put out there. And I say one thing at a time, but this is definitely on the list. You're the one who bought pants without pockets. I'm not holding anything for you, but I don't want lumps in my pants. Then you should have bought pants with pockets. It'll make my butt look lumpy. You already got me. You don't need to worry about your butt looking lumpy or unlumpy for anybody else. I know it's not lumpy, and that's all that should matter. But it isn't about you. I want everybody else to give me attention. Please hold my chapstick.

[Dick Toledo]

They've taken casual too far, too. As a guy who's taken many hits from women about wearing cargo shorts, your yoga pants Are called saddlebags now.

[Brady]

That's right. Thank you, Richard. And you shouldn't wear cargo shorts anymore, but you still do. And that's brave and I admire it.

[Unknown]

Better.

[Dick Toledo]

I'm committed.

[Brady]

I'm 20 years in their functional pants. And at a certain point, it isn't about how your ass looks in them. It's. Do I have my keys in the right spot.

[Dick Toledo]

That wasn't the intention of your yoga pants stuff down. Down the side of them.

[Brady]

Well, they. Well, you're arguing their side to where we have.

[Dick Toledo]

No, that's what I'm saying. If you're gonna use the argument against.

[Brady]

Me, if you're gonna have yoga pants, don't bring anything with you. I looked at Hillary Clinton yesterday walking up the thing going into the rotunda to be part of that deal, and she's got a purse. Like, what's in that? What do you need that for? That's a complete unnecessary accessory. That's just going to be.

[Dick Toledo]

Well, you know, it's not in it.

[Brady]

Tampons.

[Dick Toledo]

Right? I mean, it's that time she's age.

[Brady]

It's not that time of chat. No, I get it. What's in there? She doesn't need anything.

[Unknown]

Bill carry it?

[Brady]

Bill doesn't have to carry. Put it in one of your. She wears those Dr. Evil costumes that she. She's got pockets.

[Unknown]

She probably has ankle wraps in there.

[Brady]

She does. Hey, first off, she's not paying for a. Put the purse down. You're just making it a cumbersome thing. We gotta keep it's accessory your phone.

[Dick Toledo]

She's got Apple pay like we do.

[Brady]

Exactly. Put your phone in your front pocket. You need chapstick or lipstick. Put that in your other Nero jacket pocket.

[Unknown]

Yeah, those jitterbug phones aren't that big. I mean, you know, she probably had.

Lume in there and stuff.

[Brady]

If you're dressed. Look, she's. I would guess that she's pre sprayed and needs more, but even still, she's dressed like one of the waiters at Capitol Grill. They've got tons of little pouches and things and they don't have a purse. Put that down. Wine opener, idiot. Walking around with your purse like that's a thing. It's time we started to point that out to ladies. Your purse is a dumpster. You don't need all that stuff if you're wearing coats like Hillary is. If I was Bill, I'd. You know, Bill's. Bill's got. He can't talk. He's gotten away with an awful lot. So he probably can't complain much without getting he don't want to open up that can of worms. I know, I know. I've been a jerk and whatever, but seriously, if you're gonna dress like a man, how come you have to have that purse? Because you can just put all that crap in your pockets. You got 40 pockets. I just borrowed Toledo's cargo shorts. You look just as bad. Hell, I'd probably still first.

[Dick Toledo]

Thanks, Bill.

[Brady]

No problem. You do have a better build than.

[Dick Toledo]

My wife, I think.

[Brady]

But because I don't want to lose all my stuff, I keep her. You imagine me trying to start over now? I'd have to run for something else. It'd be terrible. She would have my ass. So I keep her around. I look at her walk out. Toughest job in America is mine. Every day I sit in the bedroom putting a pair of floor shines on my feet, and it comes out of the closet and says, how do I look? I mean, I got to keep a straight face. Oh, you look great. Is that one of my suits? Which purse? Belle, whatever you choose is gonna look stupid. I mean, fine. Walking around with a purse keeps their.

[Unknown]

Bumps in it, huh? They're bumping in the.

[Brady]

Oh, you think they're doing Brady? I'm with you. Maybe they're drug addicts. Brady's. Brady's insinuating the Clinton drug addicts because he just hates the left so much lie about something crazy like it may be Epstein pictures some P. Diddy. Anyway, but she's got 45 pockets in that gigantic men's suit she wears. She doesn't need a purse.

[Dick Toledo]

Hey, Chappelle said he was too ugly.

[Brady]

To go to a pizza. Exactly. How about that? How bad would it be to have Hillary go hold my chapstick? I don't want lumps in my ass. That's not chapstick, darling. I hate to break it to you. Those lumps are natural. In fact, he might just add a good one. If she made you hold stuff because she didn't want to have her pants bubbling. That's why she wears those terrible suits. And I don't know what Kamala had on yesterday, but she looked like she was. You know, the poor kids that tried to keep up in the Michael Jackson era and then bought zipper coats that you could tell were from Marshalls. They only like, one or two zippers instead of, like, 15 mumbers. Only it was. Yeah, remember when Elmer Fudd jackets were all the rage? Oh, yeah, and you could go get one, but some people came back with blue ones instead of the red and black. I was like, oh, your parents took you to Mervyn's instead of the goods store? Kamala was. That was a tough one for her to choke down. I give her credit for not crying or just storming out because that had to be rough.

[Unknown]

I grabbed that problem before.

[Brady]

That had to be. It's true. Anyway, I digress. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report, and then we say, brady report it.

[Unknown]

Good Tuesday morning, Chief Phoenix.

[Brady]

Hello, world. Hi.

[Unknown]

Happy National Hugging Day.

[Brady]

Oh. Okay.

[Unknown]

Couple of baseless fun facts. Over the next decade, the following copyrighted works will enter the public domain. Oh, Popeye, Pluto, Donald Duck, King Kong. The original movie version.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Unknown]

Superman, Daffy Duck, James Bond, Batman, Captain Marvel. Plus Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf, and the others from the Hobbit.

[Brady]

So it's all the original versions.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Which is tough with Batman because they've redone it so often. So you'd have to go back to the very first version that you can now parody legally, like they did Winnie the Pooh. And. Yeah, they make those Winnie blood and honey and all that. So they could do that now with all those characters you just mentioned, you and I could write a movie and use them as characters without paying Disney or Marvel.

[Dick Toledo]

But isn't Winnie the Pooh newer than, like, Donald and all?

[Brady]

75 years is all right. Is that what that says?

[Unknown]

No, it doesn't say the years.

[Brady]

I think it's 75 years of.

[Unknown]

I think that's right.

[Brady]

The patent on character.

[Dick Toledo]

Huh?

[Brady]

And then it becomes public.

[Unknown]

I thought it was like a hundred originally, but maybe it could be.

[Brady]

I don't know. I may be wrong on the years, but I just know that after a certain amount of time, you can't.

[Unknown]

Yeah, some could redo that in 50 years. It's public domain or whatever, but I don't know.

[Brady]

But that means that you now, all you gentle listeners can write a movie about Goofy in a porno, and Disney can't sue you as long as you use the original Goofy. Any iteration after, I think, resets that as the new thing.

[Unknown]

Shakespeare invented the name Jessica in the Merchant of Venice.

[Brady]

Thanks, Bill.

[Unknown]

In 1942, Manitoba, Canada tried to promote the sale of war bonds by staging a fake Nazi invasion of Winnipeg.

[Brady]

Did it work? You mentioned somebody tried that today. By the way, the Nazis are attacking. They're up there in Maine. We need you to start donating some money to the war bond effort. And you do it, and then you Find out it was all crap like, give me everybody that asked for their money back.

[Dick Toledo]

That's a premise of a movie already.

[Brady]

It's a complete damn. Should probably do some sort of fake Nazi invasion of Maine. No one's going to look.

[Unknown]

There's only one country between Norway and North Korea.

[Brady]

Russia.

[Unknown]

Yeah, it's gigantic. So Norway borders the northwest corner of Russia and North Korea borders the southwest corner.

[Brady]

Or that hot Russian girl that was in movies that was here for some reason. I don't remember why, but she told us about Russia. She was a playmate of the year and stuff. She was promoting something that she goes, Russia has 11 or 12 time zones.

[Unknown]

Oh my God.

[Brady]

I know. You start doing the math on that, like, Jesus thing is huge.

[Unknown]

Yesterday was Blue Monday, which is the most depressing day of the year. In response to that, the Netherlands released a positivity campaign. We not to no complaining for 30 days.

[Brady]

Hey, that's been my idea for years.

[Unknown]

Person came up with the idea, says it's a way to shift your perspective from all the whining, moaning and negativity.

[Brady]

That's great. It's like dry January, only it's more like C word January. That's a great day. I've been doing that for years. My gift. I don't want stuff. I'm a bad person to be friends or partners with because I end up buying my own gifts for myself. So birthdays are very difficult. I mean, you get me a Steelers thing, I'm not going to complain. I probably already have it. But if you get me another one, doubles are good too. That's always safe. But for the most part, I don't want gifts. I want a day free of whining and bitching about anything. I don't want to hear anything bothering you at all. And it is a great gift and I can do the same. I know I'm guilty of it too, but it's a great gift to give someone to say today you will not hear me complain about a single thing. They say things that are horrible radiate upd.

[Unknown]

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[Dick Toledo]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with Wayne.

[Brady]

From Amco and Wayne, now that it's getting warmer, I turned on the AC in my car and the air's blowing. Kind of cool, but it really smells like a basement.

[Unknown]

What can I do about that?

[Brady]

Larry, your car's AC system should be checked and serviced every year. Plus, replacing the cabin air filter helps the air blow and takes away any nasty smell. Nice.

[Dick Toledo]

Is that a big deal to get done?

[Brady]

Not at all. It takes about an hour and in most cases we can do it while you wait. That's awesome. I'll say. We're Amco.

[Dick Toledo]

Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco Double A, MCO transmissions and.

[Brady]

A whole lot more.

[Diane Fisher]

Hi, I'm Diane Fisher from Fisher Tools. From our humble beginnings in 1964 at the Phoenix park and swap to our 4 acre campus located just south of Tempe Marketplace off the 202 and McClintock, Fisher Tools has been building the Valley for over 60 years. Come check us out and browse our huge selection of tools and anything you need to do do the job right. We carry Milwaukee, DeWalt, Makita, Proto, and so much more. We're also [e-mail] CUPD listeners will receive 10% off their order when you mention this ad. Fisher Tools if we don't have it, we can't sell it.

[Michael]

This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. I made a lot of poor decisions in my past that had lifelong consequences. After I was released from prison for the last time in 2014, I discovered the process to have my convictions dismissed and all of my rights restored, including my Second Amendment rights. Since achieving this for myself in 2018, our attorney has assisted over 3,000 others in doing the same. If you are still living under the consequences of past mistakes and would like to restore your rights as I have, visit restoremycivilrights.com and book a free consultation today.

[Unknown]

Holmberg's Morning Sickness Scientists have found a way to trick little kids to eat more vegetables, fruits and vegetables. Researchers In Germany spent 20 minutes reading kids fairy tales that involved magical fruits and veggies. The hero was either healed or saved by eating them. The vegetables and the fruits.

[Brady]

Sure.

[Unknown]

After the story was done, they offered the kids a choice of four different snacks. Fruits, vegetables, cake or cookies.

[Brady]

They took the veg.

[Unknown]

Turned out they were more likely to choose the healthier options and not just right after they heard the Story. It had a lasting effect. They said 80% of the kids were still eating more fruits and veggies weeks later.

[Brady]

Well, that's the whole. You realize that Popeye was a complete indoctrination machine for vegetables.

[Unknown]

Spinach.

[Brady]

Yeah, that was it. They tried the worst one. So your parents would have it to be like, popeye and eat your spinach. Like, I hate spinach. All right, well, let's try these. These are close to, like, green beans or something else. And it worked for a while. Like, I remember I was a little kid, my mom would be like, eat your spinach. And then you try spinach. You're like, nope. As an adult, I love spinach.

[Unknown]

Popeye's a lion.

[Brady]

Son of a. Then I realized that Popeye was a corporate shill for the spinach industry.

[Unknown]

When someone says they need to use the bathroom, does it make you feel like, oh, you know what? I have to go.

[Brady]

No, because I'm not that dumb.

[Unknown]

A new study.

[Dick Toledo]

Not women.

[Brady]

That's right. Right.

[Unknown]

There's a new study on contagious urination.

[Brady]

Great band name. Great band name.

[Unknown]

Researchers in Japan noticed chimpanzees do it if one chimp, the other. Chimps nearby are more likely to go in quick succession.

[Brady]

But isn't that to mark the space?

[Unknown]

Well, they watch the chimps.

[Dick Toledo]

You ready for this?

[Unknown]

They watched 20 chimps for more than 600 hours at a zoo in Japan and tracked how often they peed within 60 seconds of each other. Turned out it happened a lot. And social rank made a difference. They were even more likely to follow suit after a dominant chimp in the group peed.

[Brady]

But it's not contagious. It's some sort of a scent mask or mark.

[Unknown]

Like a dog, Right?

[Brady]

Yeah. You'd have to be pretty suggestive to say, hey, Brett just had to pee, and I didn't till he said so. Then I. Then I just basically like, I'm going to kill just to see if that person will do it too.

[Unknown]

There are two main theories are that all the collective urine might be to keep predators away. Like you said. Yeah, mark the territory. Or it just could be a bonding thing. They compared it to how people, especially women, sometimes go to the bathroom together.

[Brady]

Broads.

[Unknown]

In humans, we know that our decision to urinate is influenced by social context that lead to us to urinate simultaneously with others. They think chimps might do the same reason to promote social bonding.

[Brady]

Every time a hooker pees on me, I have to go. So it does kind of relate. He's gonna hang around the Hallway.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, he's busy today.

[Brady]

Not that busy. I'm back, bitch. I can be everywhere and anywhere at once. I am numb. I'm omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent. That's right.

[Dick Toledo]

Omniscient.

[Brady]

Omniscient. I know it all to you. Look it up.

[Unknown]

This 19 year old kid from Wisconsin is facing charges after he tried to burn down his congressman's office. He told the cops it was because he was upset Tick Tock was going away. It happened in Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, early Sunday morning.

[Dick Toledo]

Where's that at?

[Unknown]

About three hours after Tick Tock went dark. Fond du Lac, I think is north of Milwaukee.

[Brady]

But nobody cares where Fond du Lac is. Why did you ask?

[Unknown]

I mean, really?

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, somebody does.

[Brady]

What do we have, a gas station in the 70s? Who cares where? Fond du Lac.

[Unknown]

The office he torched belongs to Congressman Glenn Grothman. He's a Republican who's been outspoken about TikTok being a security threat. He co sponsored a bill to ban it on government devices in 2022. The fire started near back door and burned some of the vinyl siding. Cops knocked down the flames pretty quick.

[Brady]

Yeah, well, Tick Tock's back and you're all right.

[Unknown]

It went down for. You know, I remember Kirby was saying something over the weekend. Hey, a couple of my friends text me. Tick Tock is down.

[Brady]

Yeah. Coming back. People under the age of 30 are scared of it.

[Dick Toledo]

30 is.

[Brady]

I'm sure TikTok is part of Kirby's life. She may not be all over it. Yeah, she doesn't have them, but she'd notice.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Fic fap. That's all you need. Tick Tock's dumb. Fic fap's the way to go.

[Unknown]

Two of her friends are on.

[Brady]

Yeah, on fic fap.

[Unknown]

Yep.

[Brady]

I don't think you know what.

[Unknown]

That one, buddy.

[Dick Toledo]

Red note.

[Unknown]

Red note. There it is, man.

[Brady]

No, they did it.

[Unknown]

I was gonna say, what are they teaching in Gilbert?

[Brady]

And I've seen them and they're hot.

[Unknown]

I'll be in jail now. They are.

[Brady]

Yeah. Check your kids phones for fic fap. And then ground them forever. No, Brady's kid. Brady. Just to clarify, Brady's daughter's friends are not on fic fap, so stop looking.

[Dick Toledo]

And don't send us whoever you find in Gilbert, man.

[Brady]

No, that's fine. That's fine.

[Dick Toledo]

Not if they're not.

[Brady]

Because we know they're not. Brady doesn't, but we do. So it's just fine if somebody wants to include the Gilbert Town seal and shove that into their body somehow. Like the mayor's gavel and. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know what it is. Not that. Not like a seal. Like a horn place. What's wrong with you? Well, they're playing horns. No, no, no. There's no actual Gilbert seal, you idiot. No, no. I gotta talk to better people. That's like being a room of Ravens fans. How dumb are you?

[Unknown]

Two people from Oregon were arrested over the weekend in the Palisades. They drove a fire truck from Portland and they were representing them. What's the name of the park? In. In LA or not in la? In Portland. And they had radios. They're in fire gear.

[Brady]

Oh.

[Unknown]

Discovered they stole the truck.

[Dick Toledo]

I imagine it has all that.

[Unknown]

No, they bought the truck at auction.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh.

[Unknown]

And they're trying to.

[Brady]

You can buy a fire truck?

[Unknown]

Sure. Retired fire trucks. Absolutely.

[Brady]

How come I don't see those in.

[Dick Toledo]

People'S drive at the Randall wanted to buy one.

[Unknown]

Yeah, you can buy them. And then there's a guy at the military assistant mission. He's got the barbecued fire truck.

[Brady]

Yes, that's true. Yeah, but you can't like. I can. I can't just have that for my night out.

[Unknown]

They claim they're from the room.

I don't know. Can you imagine pulling up to stake 44 and having a valet?

[Brady]

I can't rock the sirens, though.

[Unknown]

No, no, you can't. And I don't think you can use the lights either, because the red and the blues, right? Yeah, but you can cruise around in a fire.

[Brady]

But I can own a fire truck.

[Unknown]

Get a ladder truck.

[Dick Toledo]

Our vehicles go through comprehensive inspection and refurbishment process, which includes current pump tests and aerial certifications.

[Unknown]

And most of the time put the ladder up. Yeah, well, most of the time. These are people that have independent 1996. They need that equipment.

[Brady]

Right.

[Unknown]

Like their own fire department or something.

[Brady]

I'm talking about.

[Unknown]

Well, there you go.

[Dick Toledo]

The 85 foot platform.

[Brady]

John, what are we looking at? What's the territory?

[Dick Toledo]

5,000 miles. How much is this contact for price?

[Brady]

That's. They don't even have a price. Oh, I'd be hosing Brady all across the parking lot every day. This would be late 60s action going on for me with Brady just pushing him all over the streets. Stop hosing me off. Yikes.

[Unknown]

You can buy them on Facebook. Marketplace too.

[Dick Toledo]

What? I don't know if I'd trust.

[Brady]

Prefer.

[Dick Toledo]

Red or yellow, John.

[Brady]

I think I'm gonna go traditional red. Although the yellow is attractive. The red seems to that's what I want. One of those Adam 12 emergency paramedic fireman thing. She's got a bunch of storage in it.

[Unknown]

That looks like it's got a chop.

[Dick Toledo]

It's got a hose thing on the back.

[Brady]

Yeah, I want a fire truck.

[Unknown]

Give me a nice used sucker firewall.

[Brady]

Are they hiding all these?

[Dick Toledo]

Well, apparently everywhere.

[Unknown]

Yeah, you can buy one for 10 grand.

[Dick Toledo]

There you go. There's your price.

[Brady]

$10,000 for a full on fire truck?

[Unknown]

That's an old one, but I got it over here.

[Dick Toledo]

Let him pull it here. I'll look it out.

[Brady]

That's 135 foot ladder that thing had.

[Unknown]

There's 100 foot ladder.

[Brady]

I want it. That's 10 grand.

[Dick Toledo]

That's a 79. Oh, wow.

[Brady]

Does it run?

[Unknown]

It says vehicles in good running condition. Body in great shape, but probably needs paint. Only 16000 miles in Orlando.

[Dick Toledo]

Hello.

[Unknown]

Only 16000 miles.

[Dick Toledo]

Ah, how much fun would Shane.

[Brady]

$10,000. Do I have to go get it?

[Unknown]

Well, yeah. Oh, we would miss Vallejo.

That's not what happened at the. There's a camp, the Lost Canyon camp up in Flagstaff. They bought a fire truck and they had to drive it from like I think it was Wisconsin.

[Brady]

Awesome.

[Dick Toledo]

Okay.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Cannonball Run and you can sleep. Cannonball Run. Oh my Lord. I have seen my future and it is a fire truck. The bad thing would be driving right by accidents and stuff.

[Unknown]

Yeah, what an accident.

Just honking.

[Brady]

Honking. He's not really a fireman.

[Dick Toledo]

I need one of those bus signs. Not in service.

[Brady]

Yeah, not functional as fire truck. He drove right by our house, burned down. That son of a bitch. We have his license. Oh, that's. That jackass bought that fire truck. He drives it all over. I want that so bad.

[Unknown]

Oh, a buddy of. I just got text. Our buddy of ours just bought a fire truck at Barrett Jackson a couple years ago too.

[Brady]

But. But how come I don't see them? Maybe I do.

[Unknown]

Probably in like parades and I mean people aren't like driving them to Walmart or anything.

[Brady]

Why not?

[Dick Toledo]

I don't use it for.

[Unknown]

I don't know, you.

[Brady]

Imagine the parking. You just put it anywhere.

[Dick Toledo]

Well, I don't know if you.

[Brady]

Nobody's gonna question.

[Unknown]

They are big for.

[Dick Toledo]

Hey, you parked in front of a fire hydra.

[Brady]

You're right.

[Dick Toledo]

Never mind.

[Brady]

You could do anything you wanted. Sidewalks, people's yards. They're a problem. There's about to be. Hang on a second. And they just run into the Walmart and you grab some soda and you Come back.

[Unknown]

So I think that couple was trying to get up there and fill that fire track up with.

[Brady]

Yeah, they're looting Orlando. Just text me, are you gonna try to talk me into painting a fire truck? Talk you into. Yes. That's your job. I'm paying you. Shane painted John's fire truck and it worked out real good.

[Unknown]

These things aren't that expensive. There's one for 15.

[Brady]

Now he's out there fighting fires.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, that's shocking.

[Brady]

I feel terrible though. I think deep down I think it's a good idea until I drive by an emergency and I just kind of keep going.

[Unknown]

Sir, help us.

[Brady]

I don't know how to work it. I can just steer this thing and I'm barely good at that. Man, do I think that's the inner five year old in me. That's why I wanted a cyber truck. It looks like a toy I played with when I was.

[Dick Toledo]

Here's one's a little pricier. 2001 models from Scottsdale. 75 grand pointing down for.

[Brady]

Oh, it's showing you.

[Dick Toledo]

The cab is up on it.

[Brady]

Oh, man.

[Unknown]

Yeah, that's fantastic. There's a lot of working.

[Brady]

That's the one.

[Unknown]

Look at that. Look at those AC units.

[Brady]

Look like you could live in that. Oh, man. I'm checking out boys.

[Dick Toledo]

48,000Watt generator.

[Brady]

John bought that fire truck and disappeared. Morning sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible. Hey, everybody, it's John Holmberg from the morning sickness talking to Shane Orlando from Orlando Auto Body. Now, Shane, I take great pride in saying I stand with someone when I tell a listener to go to their shop. I know why. You tell me what's different for a KUPD listener to go to Orlando Auto Body than anywhere else. Well, first of all, we've been in valley here for over 34 years. We do a quality job. We work for you, not the insurance companies. So we can work together to make sure your listeners are getting the customer service they deserve. If your car's been wrecked and you need that thing fixed the right way, get on over there now. Orlandoautobody.com it's Dick Toledo.

[Dick Toledo]

And new customers right now on FanDuel get $150 in bonus bets when your first $5 wager wins. Just visit FanDuel.com KUPD to grab $150 in college hoops bonus bets with a winning five dollar bet and prepare for March on FanDuel America's 1 sportsbook 21 plus and President Arizona first online real money wager. Only $5 first deposit required. Bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets which expire seven days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See [e-mail] gambling problem. Call 1-800-next-step or text next step to Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Unknown]

There's your camper.

[Brady]

2001. It should be Toledo's. It's called the Salisbury Spartan, which was his nickname in high school. Wow.

[Dick Toledo]

Was operated in the city of Chandler.

[Brady]

Man, oh, man. All right. Get off of that. That's got me. I got too many bad ideas floating through my head. And I might end up with a fire truck. If I gotta be careful.

[Unknown]

Can be used as a crowd getter for events like Burning Man.

[Dick Toledo]

What?

[Brady]

They'll pay me to just show up to stuff. So that's what the cyber truck was. It looked like a toy I'd have played with when I was little. So when I got it, I'm like, this is great. And then they showed me the final.

[Dick Toledo]

When you got it, you got.

[Brady]

Well, no, I got in it. Not even got in it. Just started to see the numbers. Wait a minute.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, you never even got in one?

[Brady]

No, I've seen.

[Dick Toledo]

I thought you went.

[Brady]

Trust me. It was a toy I wanted to play with. There was nothing that thing could do that was going to disappoint me. Except for it's $136,000 before I started to, like, see it. Before delivery fees.

[Unknown]

Oh, wow.

[Brady]

So it would have pushed about 150 by the time it was done. And I just can't justify anything close to that for a vehicle. That's goofy. Ten grand for a fire truck. That's reasonable.

[Dick Toledo]

People do pretty well in my neighborhood. There's three of them in our neighborhood.

[Brady]

Fire trucks.

[Dick Toledo]

Cyber trucks.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

I'll look for the fire trucks, though. I haven't. You know, maybe.

[Brady]

Maybe some of the fire trucks that pass me, I just assume are fire trucks from a fire station. It's just some dude going to the store.

[Dick Toledo]

That could be.

[Unknown]

Can you imagine if you rolled into your neighborhood with a fire truck? Troy and Michael would lose their hosing.

[Brady]

My flaming neighbors.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Hoping the firemen are gonna. From the calendar are gonna come out and everything.

[Brady]

And it's just you. What's up, guys?

[Dick Toledo]

John, near U.S. house office, 71st and Maryland has one in the driveway. Are you sure that they don't just.

[Brady]

Work for them or they're constantly needing Narcan? 71st Avenue in Maryland. It's probably just Narcan deliveries, John.

[Dick Toledo]

The only thing you need is that water cannon on the top that would be a dream, man.

[Brady]

Then I just go tie into a city fire hydrant and make it rain. This is too much. I can't have this much.

[Unknown]

You know, you carry what I have. How big the tank is for the water storage.

[Dick Toledo]

Not sure what this means, John. You think your neighbors would even give you the chance to use it? It's theirs the moment it parks in the cul de sac.

[Brady]

Why own everything that's in the cul de sac? Gays got rights. They didn't get rights to all my stuff.

[Unknown]

Anyway, I got a couple of pretty videos.

[Brady]

All right.

[Unknown]

Oh, first one's a dude on a motorcycle. Slow motion. He's putting his foot out. It might be trail riding.

[Brady]

Oh, boy.

[Dick Toledo]

That's not a trail.

[Brady]

No going on. No, no. The road will let you know. He's got his foot down on the road, and. Oh, he lays it down, and there goes the leg in slow motion. Oh, and then a guy runs over it.

[Unknown]

Those are dirt bikes.

[Brady]

Those are dirt bikes. But it doesn't look like they're on a dirt trail. I think they're on, like, a side road. That was just a terrible accident.

[Dick Toledo]

Leg is not supposed to go that direction.

[Brady]

And that's a great angle of the camera to put that on the back fender of your bike so you see everything when the driver gets run over.

[Unknown]

Next one's a little snowboarding accident.

[Brady]

That's the end of it. And it's a Red Bull ramp. So he goes up onto the. On the rail. He just missed. He just missed his hit on the soldier and just goes face under the earth. Girl.

[Dick Toledo]

I thought I saw a ponytail on the back.

[Brady]

It could be a snowboarder.

[Unknown]

Last one's where they're throwing their buddy with it, using the blanket and tossing them up in the air.

[Brady]

And it is a terrible country because the men are in those weird outfits. Oh, they had them in the sheet. So it's one of those things where they have a sheet and a guy laying on it, and everybody tries to bounce him in the air, and the dude didn't want it. That might have been a punishment for, like, seeing a woman's ankles.

[Unknown]

I think that's.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's how they punish him in that country.

[Unknown]

That's originally what happened to our. The armless Candy Loggins, the limbless guy. No, it is out of that blanket numerous times.

[Brady]

I heard it's how John Sykes died.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, you can't until you hear different.

[Brady]

Yeah, you see a woman's ankles in that country, and they put you on the. On the Upside down trampoline and smash into the planet. Anyway, don't start this. People email. Cybertruck's only 80 to 100,000 out. Yeah, they say that, and then you start adding a couple of things, and then the next thing you know, there's like, a delivery fee. It got up there fast. I think the end. The end price was 103. And then I got another thing, says 128, 136delivery fee. I'm like, what did I do different here that. It boosted it way up there. And then I'm like, why am I doing this? $100,000 for a. I get a fire truck. Yeah, get a fire truck. Get 10 of them.

[Dick Toledo]

Brady, I hesitate in texting this, but there is one in your neighborhood. Elliot and Wrecker, go find it.

[Unknown]

A fire truck? Yes.

[Brady]

No kidding. Guy just owns a fire truck. Maybe I've been assuming too much. And there's a lot more fire trucks just doing as daily drivers. Who knew? All right, Bert, what do you got?

[Dick Toledo]

All right, John, I just see you and Brady pulling the Little Rascals fire scene in your truck.

[Brady]

And, you know, we would get in trouble, like trying to be heroes, and we get to something and make a fire 10 times worse.

[Unknown]

We got it.

[Brady]

Yeah. Brady and I were first on scene in the Palisades. It was just a house fire, and we tried to help and didn't realize what we were doing. Turns out it was an oil fire, like a. In a pan, and we were just shooting it all over the place.

[Unknown]

We'll start off with a train action here.

[Brady]

Oh, okay. Real train. Not like porn train.

[Unknown]

No.

[Brady]

Oh. Guy crossing the tracks on a snowy day.

[Dick Toledo]

It's the light.

[Brady]

And. And it's telling you. It's got the flashy lights. It's telling. Oh, God. It just ate the whole front of the car. I think he's all right, though.

[Dick Toledo]

I think he might be okay, too.

[Brady]

Is there an after on this? Okay. Unfortunately, no follow up train. Just devastating.

[Dick Toledo]

What do you do as a.

[Unknown]

He was lucky.

[Dick Toledo]

You just got to radio that in. Right? He's not stopping for, like, three more miles.

[Brady]

No, he can't stop. They just keep going. I just pretend it didn't happen.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Brady]

If I was the driver of a train, I didn't notice anything. No, I didn't notice. Yeah, until somebody tell the passengers, like, did we do that?

[Unknown]

This is the reason you hire a plumber?

[Brady]

We're in a. We're undoing some pvc. Oh, is that a tampon or something? The pipe broke in his face. And it's all poop. Okay, first off, we're in a country that uses 1 inch plastic tubing for their. For their sewage.

[Unknown]

Well, curry goes right through you, so you're fine.

[Brady]

That's true. There's no solid chunks. Okay, so I guess that makes sense. You can just use PVC pipe for your plumbing.

[Unknown]

Just same you use for your irrigation.

[Brady]

Up front and outside than what I have for my sprinklers. But you're right, there are smaller people and their poo is all liquid.

[Dick Toledo]

John, we're only five months away, but that should give you plenty of time to plan. Can we skip the arcade cabinet for the man cave upgrade this year? Throwing a fire truck. I'll kick in on a GoFundMe to get that thing in.

[Brady]

I'll talk to Meathead and we'll see if we can do that. That's a good one. You're right. And there's no tampons. I think those people just free bleed.

[Unknown]

Oh, yeah, come on.

[Brady]

That's my guess about I don't know that nation. But if you've got plastic PVC pipes for your sewage, you're not spending any money on, stay free.

[Dick Toledo]

John, you do not want a fire truck, okay? What you want is an mrap. What's an mrap?

[Brady]

I don't know.

[Dick Toledo]

Somebody's gonna have to explain that too.

[Brady]

Are they for sale?

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Unknown]

Google it.

[Brady]

Yeah. What else you got, Bert?

[Unknown]

Some baseball action for you. Probably one of the hardest collisions you've said. We might have seen something similar to this before.

[Brady]

Oh, first base, second baseman comes to cover the bag and they collide face to face. That number 11 is dead. He's got the shakes going because one guy's moving and one's not. Look at this guy.

[Dick Toledo]

He's got the tour.

[Brady]

Oh, he's definitely doing gang signs. He's trying to get his glove off because I think his whole body's broke.

[Dick Toledo]

Well, they both have smashed cheeks.

[Brady]

Number 11 is dead.

[Unknown]

And then this one is. This is a new one. Haven't seen this one before.

[Brady]

We're being introduced to something brand new. All right. Oh, oh, wait a sec.

[Unknown]

What? Through where?

[Brady]

What the. All right.

[Dick Toledo]

Okay.

[Brady]

Pigs in a blanket. All right, here's how it works. I know what this is. A lady with rather large labia has taken two clamps. C clamps? Really? Is what they are. Kinda. Yeah. And she's pierced her labia. Now she's taken her labia and tied each to the other, leaving a tunnel like gap as a thing. And there is a man getting it done. He is now in like a pig in a blanket or those little hot dogs that are wrapped with croissants.

[Dick Toledo]

Interesting.

[Brady]

And, yeah, she has large enough labia.

[Unknown]

See, if Vince's wife would have done this, it wouldn't have been a problem.

[Brady]

She wouldn't be pregnant. She should consider this method. So it's basically making fingers out of your lips.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And then tying them together.

[Dick Toledo]

I see. Yeah.

[Brady]

It's gripping and it works. This guy's enjoying the tar out of. Yeah, and evidently she'd get something out of that, too, because it's rubbing on the bald man in the canoe.

[Unknown]

Yeah. So we'll just end there.

[Brady]

All right.

[Dick Toledo]

John, I want to make you happy. The only light you cannot flash is blue, red and white lights on your new fire truck. Go nuts.

[Brady]

Nobody knows that. I'm never gonna stop for another light in my life.

[Unknown]

And then probably. No, the sound is fine. Then, too, sirens might be a problem.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't know about that.

[Unknown]

Now they say you need a matte V instead of an mrap.

[Brady]

That's what's a lot better than an mrp. I don't know.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't even know what either classify all this stuff.

[Brady]

Look, 12 minutes ago I didn't know I wanted a fire truck. Now I know I do. I didn't know they were available to. I thought they just. Oh, blew them up.

[Unknown]

MRAP is the armored vehicles we had in Iraq.

[Brady]

Yeah, of course I want to, but that's going to cost more than 12 grand. And it doesn't have sirens.

[Dick Toledo]

Right.

[Unknown]

I can take IED explosions. Apparently.

[Brady]

I don't need that.

[Unknown]

Well, if you're ever going to Maryville.

[Brady]

That's true, but why would I do that? If I'm going to Maryvale, it's because I have an armored car. That's the only reason I'm going to Maryvale.

[Dick Toledo]

It's made to survive an ied, Right?

[Brady]

That's what he just said. Where were you? Did he not survive it? Was the explosion too loud anyway? Yeah. I don't want to. I don't want. Look, I'm not going to Maryvale, so I don't need an armored car.

[Dick Toledo]

John, I know you don't like us, but can we start a truck club? Maybe Homburg's fire brigade? I'll try and get myself a fire truck and we'll join it.

[Brady]

What do you mean? I don't like us. You?

[Dick Toledo]

I don't know.

[Brady]

I don't want to join any clubs with anybody. But what does that mean.

[Dick Toledo]

Right.

[Brady]

You're right.

[Dick Toledo]

You don't like us.

[Brady]

I don't like people who want to be in clubs together, so. He's got a point. Let's join a club. That's pretty cool. That's going to be a lot more than 12 grand. It's got a satellite on it. That thing's got DirecTV. I. And I want that truck.

[Dick Toledo]

Those probably shouldn't be for sale on Craigslist.

[Brady]

No, it seems like that's kind of what a bad guy would use to do terrible stuff.

[Unknown]

Yeah, or just going home to Maryville.

[Brady]

Yeah, you're gonna. But again, I'm dodging that area now. Not because.

[Unknown]

But if you live there, you need one.

[Brady]

But the own. Sure. But you can't afford it. You can't sell a 1998 Impala and trade that in for them. It can't be done. You're stuck with drugs on a player. You're stuck with your whip. You're done. Oh, my God. It's 840.

[Dick Toledo]

They are for sale.

[Unknown]

They modifying the MRAP to civilian.

[Brady]

That's like an ugly SUV.

[Unknown]

They're gonna be expensive.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's. That's $200,000. That's dumb.

[Dick Toledo]

This one's called the Peacekeeper.

[Brady]

Look at this thing. If I'm driving around in that, the cops should pull me over. Yeah, and question me for my next terrorist move.

[Dick Toledo]

But again, to use your fire truck argument that over.

[Brady]

Oh, they're pulling that over.

[Unknown]

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, they are.

[Brady]

That's a homemade nut bags car.

[Unknown]

What'd you pull me over for?

[Brady]

You because you got a howitzer on your car, you track ass and we can't shoot you. You man allowed to drive around in an armored vehicle with a howitzer on the top? I thought we were in America.

[Dick Toledo]

Whatever.

[Unknown]

Anyway, EM50 is one thing. That's ridiculous.

[Brady]

EM50 blended. Yes. There you go. That is your Brady report, everybody. It's 98 KUPD. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.