01-21-26 - Rock Wars - Rock Song With The Best Opening Lyric Line

Summary

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Episode Overview

Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona
Date: January 21, 2026
Episode: Rock Wars – Rock Song With The Best Opening Lyric Line

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness centers around the beloved weekly segment “Rock Wars.” The hosts challenge each other to pick the rock song with the best opening lyric line, in celebration of National One Liner Day. The lively banter between John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Michael Paulson, and their crew leads to spirited discussion, personal picks, and memorable quotes—culminating in a call-in vote for the segment’s winner. The episode is filled with music geekery, humor, and a frank appreciation of iconic rock lyricism.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Challenge: Best Opening Lyric Line (02:31–03:24)

• Brady announces the week’s “Rock Wars” topic:

  “Being that it’s national one liner day—the coolest opening line of a rock song.” (02:36, Brady)

• Clarifications:
  • The line must be the first sung lyric, not just part of a cool intro or refrain.
  • Listeners are invited to send suggestions via email or text.

2. Hosts’ Picks and Rationale

A. Michael’s Pick: Volbeat – “Still Counting” (04:49–05:13)

• Opening line:

  “Counting all the assholes in the room, I’m definitely not alone.”

• Michael argues:

  “That’s the show’s theme, you know.” (05:10, Michael Paulson)
  Humorously connects the song’s blunt, self-aware lyric with the morning show’s irreverent style.

B. John’s Pick: Simon & Garfunkel (Disturbed cover) – “The Sound of Silence” (05:18–06:54)

• Opening line:

  “Hello darkness, my old friend.”

• John’s view:

  “That’s 3,000 thoughts in five words. It’s an incredible line.” (06:34, John Holmberg)
  He praises the poetic power and recognizability of the lyric, though jokes about Disturbed frontman David Draiman singing it “like Dracula” (06:33, John Holmberg).

C. Brady’s Pick: The Rolling Stones – “Sympathy for the Devil” (07:24–07:58)

• Opening line:

  “Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man of wealth and taste.”

• Brady on his choice:

  “This is the first song that came to mind. ... The intro gets you right into the frame of mind.” (07:24, Brady)
  The group praises the lyrical sophistication and swagger of the Stones’ opener.

3. Hosts React, Debate, and Banter

• John on the Power of Opening Lyrics:

  “A lot of people missed it on email—they just picked a cool opening, like, the line wasn’t great. ... It’s a powerful opening line. Not just a great start to a song.” (04:19, John Holmberg)

• Group jokes about covers vs. originals (07:39–08:13):
  • Guns N’ Roses vs. Stones on “Sympathy for the Devil”
  • Disturbed’s theatrical cover of Simon & Garfunkel

4. The Phone Vote and Winner (08:13–09:47)

• A caller, Alan, is brought in to judge. He dramatically votes for Brady (Pop Pop):

  “Pop Pop is swinging for defenses and coming after all your cheese. Pop up for the win!” (09:26, Alan)

• Alan puts John in last place, who laughs off “flubbing it.”
• The hosts discuss their affection for both the Stones and GNR versions of “Sympathy for the Devil.”
• Brady wins, and the segment closes out with celebratory banter and a nod to rock trivia.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On picking the right lyric:

  “You can't be this mad... He makes his own reality and chastises even anyone who tries to personally destroy somebody who challenges it.” (01:22–01:48, John Holmberg, referencing Trump and political impressions)

• Banter on Disturbed’s cover:

  “Then Dave Draymond sang it like Dracula.” (06:33, John Holmberg)
  “He almost sings it like Jason.” (06:54, Michael Paulson)

• More quips:

  “The show's theme, you know.” (05:10, Michael Paulson, about “Still Counting”)
  “That’s 3,000 thoughts in five words.” (06:34, John Holmberg, on 'Hello Darkness...')
  “It’s a great line because you know what you’re getting into. I mean, they cut right to the middle of the cheese right there.” (08:16, John Holmberg, on Benny Mardones’ notorious opener)

• Victory and closure:

  “The song is exactly 7 minutes and 26 seconds, which is my birthday. It’s almost like they did it for me.” (09:47, John Holmberg, about “Sympathy for the Devil”)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|----------------------------------------------------| | 02:31 | Rock Wars topic announced: Best opening lyric line | | 04:49 | Michael presents Volbeat pick | | 05:18 | John presents Simon & Garfunkel pick | | 07:24 | Brady presents Rolling Stones pick | | 08:13 | Listener vote called in | | 09:26 | Alan declares Brady/Pick winner | | 09:47 | Hosts discuss “Sympathy for the Devil” covers |

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Episode Structure

• Theme: The power and impact of opening rock lyrics
• Hosts’ Selections: Each presents and champions their favorite, with rationale and musical fanfare
• Group Reaction: Casual, humorous, honest discussion about rock lyrics and covers
• Listener Involvement: Phone-in voting with playful stakes
• Resolution: Celebratory win for Brady with “Sympathy for the Devil”

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Final Notes

This episode is a celebration of rock music’s storytelling power, distilled into its boldest opening lines. With humor, friendly rivalry, and some pokes at each other’s choices, the hosts remind listeners of rock’s enduring wit and poetry—making for an episode that’s equal parts fun and musically insightful.

Transcript

[Michael Paulson]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmberg here, seeing clear as a bell, thanks to my friends at the Schwartz Laser Eye Center. Well, here we are looking at a brand new year. Can you see yourself in 2026? Can you see it all? I mean, really? Maybe in 2026, you should see yourself seeing. Fix those eyes. Vision changes are gradual. You might not even know how bad it's gotten. I know. That was my story. So start the new year by seeing clearly. Visit Dr. Jay Schwartz and his team, Schwartz Laser Eye Center, 480-483-Eyes Schwartz Laser Eye center, the official eye center for your Diamondbacks and sons.

[Michael]

This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. It's still over 110 degrees outside, and the political climate is just as hot. If you've lost your right to possess a firearm due to a criminal conviction, we can help at Restore My Civil Rights. We help Arizonans restore all of their rights because constitutional rights shouldn't depend on the next election results. To book a free consultation, call 855- GUN RIGHTS or visit restoremycivilrights.com today. That's restoremysivilrights.com youm thought that was funny?

[John Holmberg]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you? Holy smokes. We got late. We were running along. Melissa.

[Michael Paulson]

Good thing we don't have John Gordon here.

[John Holmberg]

I'm telling you, Melissa, who I love, she emails a lot. I know she's very fun. She heard me goofing on Trump and she goes, how are you just now noticing the diminished cognitive function of Trump? All that crap you talked with old man Biden and you acknowledge that half of. I'm like, oh, my God, is this what I was talking about? You can't be this mad. So I said, I don't think I do an impression of Trump that's like all that flattering. He sounds kind of like a nonsensical boob that she says you make him sound like a confident dealmaker, completely vain and arrogant and delusional. Like, then it's a great impression. He's always been like that. It's one of the reasons people like Dealmaker. He makes his own reality and chastises even anyone who tries to personally destroy somebody who challenges it. Yeah, that's the fun of it, but I'm just relaxed about it now. Don't get mad at Melissa. You're too sweet. And then Justin says, I appreciate the fact you find humor in today's news, John. For me, everything feels like a TV show I refuse to watch because it's just infuriatingly stupid. And I see that too, but I, like, hate watching stuff. Makes me happy. All right, Rock wars is upon us. I am the chooser of such things. I'm gonna go ahead.

[Brady]

I thought I had the topic.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you do. Oh, that's right. Go ahead. I forgot. I keep thinking I am, but. Okay, you got it. Go ahead. Being a good one too.

[Brady]

Being that it's national one liner day.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, boy.

[Brady]

The coolest opening line of a rock song.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I like that. Freddie. Well done. The coolest opening line of a rock song. The coolest first line of a rock song. Oh, yeah. All right, I like that one. You can help out [e-mail] you can do B. Bogan at 98k. I forgot about that crybaby you got about that B. But do that one. Don't even do mine. B. [e-mail] you can text 97936. You can come up with your suggestions. The best opening line of a rock song in history. Three or four popping in my head right there. And it has to be sung. Or is it? Yeah, it's the first, like, lyrical.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

First lyric. Not just like some refrain talking. Okay, got it. All right. That's a good one. I like that. Nice job. All right, we got Rock wars up. If you guys want to play along, you know how to do it. We'll have our suggestions next. Morning sickness. Disgusting. They smell, they're sticky. They say things that are horrible. Morning sickness. It's time for the weekly battle of musical supremacy known only as Rock Wars. And it is brought to you by our friends at Mo Money Pond. Shorter long term collateral loans from $10 to over 100,000American dollars. No credit needed. Top dollar paid. The entire process just taking several minutes. Mo Money Pawn.com. 12th street, an Indian school. If and you're interested. All right, this week's Rock Wars. A lot of people missed it on the email. Like they just picked a cool opening. Like the line wasn't great. It's just a memorable, like, you know, people wanted. Jules is on a vacation. Like, that's not a cool opening line. It's the cool song start. Like, what's the line? That's like, oh, that's a powerful opening line. Not just a great start to a song because then Bawa Taba could win and Jesus Christ but, yeah, all right. I was the third or. No, you were right. So you could pick who goes first. All right, go ahead.

[Brady]

Go ahead, Joe.

[John Holmberg]

You want me to go first? I haven't given it to. I'm still.

[Michael Paulson]

I think that this song basically describes this show with the opening lines. And let's hear from Michael Paulson from Volbeat.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Counting all the assholes in the room. That's pretty. So counting all the. In the room. I'm definitely not alone. So relatable. So relatable.

[Michael Paulson]

So that's the show's theme, you know.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I don't know which to go. You want me to go next or you want to go?

[Brady]

Sure.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know which to go with which version of this it is to me now. My. My. One of my favorite songs, if not my favorite song of all time, is Todd Rungren's hello, It's Me. I think the beginning of that hello, It's Me is so un. It's not a great line, but it's just such a great moment in a song. So. Though I was thinking of songs that have that thing that just grab your. The other one. I thought it was ain't but Tricks and Hoes. I thought that was kind of a thing. What was the other one? Somebody. All you. All you hoes. And here. Somebody here. Go. But I. I don't know which one you're going with, but this is the best opening line of any song. Poetic. It's poetry. It's amazing. And. Hello, darkness, my old friend. But I just don't like the way Draymond did it. I love this. It's good. It's powerful. That's a great line. Yeah. Hello, darkness, my old friend. Come.

[Brady]

Did you throw it at him?

[John Holmberg]

That's. Yeah. That's 3,000. That's 3,000 thoughts in. In five words. It's incredible line. And then Dave Dramond sang it like Dracula.

[Michael Paulson]

He almost sings it like Jason.

[John Holmberg]

It's Jason in that dream zone. What was that? Saving Sarah Marcus. Yeah.

[Michael Paulson]

Yeah, that's it.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Michael Paulson]

That Dracula song.

[Brady]

Dracula, Pupp.

[John Holmberg]

Those Streets of color. It's a great song. He. He doesn't ruin it, but I like the original better. But we're talking greatest opening lines of a song. Hello, darkness, my old friend. Boom. You say it in. In honor of world One liner day. People are like, I know that one all day. Brett's is pretty strong, too. Brady, go ahead.

[Brady]

I came up with the topic because this is the first song that came to mind. It. It's so cool. Because the intro gets you right into the frame of mind. And then when he opens up with that opening song. And I went with the original version because it's the best.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

Rolling Stones.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

Sympathy.

[John Holmberg]

Lyrically, this is one of the greatest songs ever written. All right, Brady, what is the opening line?

[Brady]

Please allow me to introduce myself. I'm a man of wealth and taste.

[John Holmberg]

Well done. Making sure he didn't pull that out of the Internet.

[Michael Paulson]

That's one of those ones where I can do the remake or the original and I'm happy.

[John Holmberg]

Both are great. They're both. Oh, yeah. I think actually think the original's amazing. The Guns n Roses version is.

[Michael Paulson]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Unbelievable.

[Brady]

You did a great job.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Those are good ones. And we don't have time for any farting. So, John Gordon, pick a number between one and one and we'll do final call. The phone number is 585-9800. If you want to vote and pick a winner, it's $10 out of the two losers pockets. I don't know how we determine last place off of this. We'll ask the caller who they like the least. There you go. Will it be Volbeat? Still counting. The line is counting all the assholes in the room. I'm definitely not alone. It's a great line. Now, Brady chose Sympathy for the devil. Please allow me to introduce myself. I'm a man of wealth and taste. And I chose Simon and Garfunkel to be manhandled by Dave Draiman. Hello, darkness, my old friend. Dexters are angry you didn't go with Benny Mardones. I thought about that. That was in my head. That was there. But it's not a great line. It's disturbing. It's just creepy. It's memorable. She's just 16 years old. It's a great line because you know what you're getting into. I mean, they cut right to the middle of the cheese right there. Allen is on the line. Alan's gonna determine the winner. Alan, who's got it this week? I'm gonna tell you, boys, Pop Pop is swinging for defenses and coming after all your cheese. Pop up for the win. Pop up. All right, who lost, me or Brett? Who's in third? John, I'm gonna say you probably flubbed it pretty hard on this one. All right, good. All right. There we go. That's fine. I flubbed it. It's okay. All right, we'll go a little symphony. I'm fine with this song. Thank you.

[Michael Paulson]

Alan Original or gnr?

[John Holmberg]

The GNR Version, We're Men.

[Brady]

I just had to give credit to.

[John Holmberg]

No, look, the Stones version, we. When we did that for Night of the Singing Dead, the guys came in with the Guns N Roses guitars, and I did the Mick Jagger version vocally, and it, like, blended just fine. And then we kind of mixed up the chorus with what Jagger did. It's too much fun to not do the Mick Jagger version. It's great, though, this song. Come on. Outstanding. The guitars in this are great. All right, Brady, nice job. Well done. Hey. And the song is exactly 7 minutes and 26 seconds, which is my birthday. It's almost like they did it for me. It is Guns N Roses, Sympathy for the Devil. Brady Wit, Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.