01-23-26 - Guad Squares - Darth Vader - Dave Mustaine - Trump - Jay Leno - Geography Grady/Brady - Jason Statham - Howard Stern

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Guad Squares Comedy Episode

Date: January 23, 2026
Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98KUPD
Episode Theme:
A raucous, character-driven round of the “Guad Squares”—the show’s unique version of Hollywood Squares—featuring hilarious impressions, quick-witted banter, Arizona in-jokes, and running gags centered around Corey ‘Thriller’ Walsh’s birthday.

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Episode Overview

This episode delivers a fast-paced, laugh-filled game of Guad Squares featuring the show’s signature cast of characters and celebrity impressions, riffing on everything from Star Wars and classic rock to presidential antics and local Arizona geography. The show opens with a birthday shout-out for Corey ‘Thriller’ Walsh, who also hosts the Squares segment, and spirals into playful chaos and self-deprecating humor. Throughout, the cast pokes fun at themselves, each other, and a rotating roster of pop culture icons, while interacting with listeners in gaudy Arizona fashion.

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Key Segments & Highlights

1. Corey 'Thriller' Walsh’s Birthday & Team Banter

[01:23–03:44]

• Corey’s birthday is discovered but missing from the staff wall:
  • “You’ve worked here for a decade...your birthday never shows up.” – John Holmberg [01:31]
  • Jokes about birthday traditions and awkward ‘setups’ with listeners’ daughters.
• Spirited teasing as the crew discusses staff traditions and Thrivers’ dating prospects.

---

2. Guad Squares Begin – Star Wars and Comic Impressions

Darth Vader & Death Star Comedy Jam

[03:44–05:23]

• John as Darth Vader announces the “Death Star Comedy Jam”:
  • “It’s like Kill Tony, but it’s Kill Chewy—you have one minute to make Chewy laugh.” – John Holmberg (as Vader) [03:49]
• Improv sets involving Star Wars characters and space dealership jokes:
  • “I just got a new ride...it’s a Hellcat TIE fighter.” – John (Vader) [05:02]

Dave Mustaine Appears (Megadeth)

[05:37–06:59]

• Parody of Mustaine’s interview quirks; writing his own questions:
  • “You gotta read the questions I wrote for myself. Hello, me, it’s me with a question.” – “Dave Mustaine” [05:58]
  • Running gag about ‘shredded wheat’ cereal and ‘shredding’ [06:47]

President Trump Square

[06:59–08:35]

• Brett as Trump claims to be negotiating for Greenland, mixing in Arizona-specific confusion (“Is it Green Glendale?”) and classic bravado:
  • “I’m making a deal for Greenland right now. Great deal.” – “Trump” [07:03]
  • “If I don’t win the Nobel Peace Prize, I’m gonna kill every last Greenlandian Inuit there is.” [07:41]
• Trump praises Darth Vader’s building skills:
  • “A lot of people say he’s not a good guy, look at what he’s gotten done!” [08:15]

Jay Leno at Barrett-Jackson

[08:40–09:57]

• John’s Leno impression shares car show anecdotes and playful self-deprecation about his age and infamous accidents:
  • "I don’t like Hellcats. Something about me inside a Hellcat—it’s like the frosting in an Oreo." [08:52]
  • “I landed on a muffler and burned my face off.” [09:22]

---

3. Arizona Geography Gags – “Geography Grady/Brady”

[09:57–11:40, 18:16–19:36]

• John blends the characters Grady and Brady for mock-inept but earnest Arizona geography lessons:
  • “I got the GPS tracking on my ass—I’m geography graduated.” [10:13]
  • Interacts with Corey about local restaurants (“Cooper’s Hawk”) and general direction jokes.
  • Geography-related humor continues during the listener games:
    • “Where’s South Mountain? ...Put a pin in it. It’s right back there—it’s a big one.” [19:15]
  • Running joke: “I’m Grady Grogan. Geography—I mean, I run a geography bee. I’m a geography beekeeper like Jason Statham, only with the places.” [19:04]

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4. Jason Statham & “The Beekeeper”

[13:03–13:56]

• Brett impersonates Statham, riffing on his recent “Beekeeper” movie:
  • “I’m only here because there’s no reason. I was just driving fast through your city.” [13:06]
  • “The bees are doing great, Brady, thanks for asking.” [13:19]
  • “Got a new movie coming out—Beekeeper 2: This Time It’s Personal.” [13:37]

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5. “Secret Square” & Other Impressions

[14:06–14:27]

• The secret square gives a clue about “Sully” Sullenberger, hero of the Hudson landing.

6. Howard Stern Roasting Holmberg

[14:34–16:15]

• John does a Stern parody mocking comparisons to his own show:
  • “Homer gets called a cheap imitation…I mean, in other words, it’s a different show, is what you say.” – “Howard Stern” [14:57]
  • Jokes about “vabbing,” Beth, and Howard’s radio dominance.
  • Absurd lines about “getting a hand job from that crippled kid” and “neurodivergent vanity” (pushing boundary of irreverence).

7. Listener Interaction & Trivia

[17:48–22:13]

• Two listeners, Betty and Chris, join to play the Squares.
• Geography jokes continue as listeners answer absurd Arizona questions.
• Trivia includes:
  • On swearing and honesty: “People who swear are more dishonest than those who do not.” [19:37, Answer: False]
  • On phones dropped in toilets: “Approximately 20% of all cell phones in use have been dropped in the toilet or urinal.” [21:32; President Trump answers ‘true,’ which the contestant accepts as correct]

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8. Final Lightning Rounds & Running Gags

President Trump Commentary

• “Betty, probably has a picture above her fireplace of me with a bloody ear…The blacks love me!” – “Trump” [20:35, 20:50]

Callbacks to Birthday and Awkward Blind Date Offers

[22:41–23:54]

• The crew keeps circling back to “Thriller’s” birthday dinner at Cooper’s Hawk, trying to orchestrate a meeting with a “special,” possibly neurodivergent admirer, to his comic discomfort.
  • “First kid that waddles in with a big limp, that’s Corey.” – John [23:25]

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “It’s like Kill Tony, but it’s Kill Chewy—you have one minute to make Chewy laugh.” – John (as Darth Vader) [03:49]
• “You gotta read the questions I wrote for myself. Hello me, it’s me with a question.” – “Dave Mustaine” [05:58]
• “If I don’t win the Nobel Peace Prize, I’m gonna kill every last Greenlandian Inuit there is.” – “Trump” [07:41]
• “I don’t like Hellcats… I feel like the frosting inside an Oreo.” – Jay Leno [08:52]
• “I got the GPS tracking on my ass—I’m geography graduated.” – Geography Grady [10:13]
• “This is… The golden asshole has spoken.” – “Howard Stern” [15:03]
• “First kid that waddles in with a big limp, that’s Corey.” – John [23:25]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Time | Segment | |---------|-----------------------------------------------| | 01:23 | Corey’s Birthday Banter | | 03:44 | Darth Vader / Death Star Comedy Jam | | 05:37 | Dave Mustaine Interview Parody | | 06:59 | President Trump on Greenland | | 08:40 | Jay Leno at Barrett Jackson | | 09:57 | Geography Grady/Brady | | 13:03 | Jason Statham/Beekeeper | | 14:34 | Howard Stern Parody | | 17:48 | Listener Game Begins | | 19:37 | Trivia – Swearing & Honesty | | 21:32 | Trivia – Phones in Toilets | | 22:41 | Birthday/Birthday Dinner Running Gag, Outro |

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Tone & Style

• Irreverent, rapid-fire, and at times gleefully offensive—with a dense layering of local references, pop-culture parodies, and unapologetic Arizona flavor.
• The hosts and their alter egos constantly rib one another, toe the line of bad taste, and thrive on spontaneous comedy rooted in personal quirks and playful insults.

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Final Thoughts

This installment of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness is a wild ride through Arizona humor, character impressions, and absurdist banter, all underpinned by the joyful mocking of “Thriller’s” birthday. The episode is equal parts loving camaraderie and savage roast, ensuring listeners are laughing, sometimes groaning, and always on their toes.

For fans of fast-paced improv, irreverent podcasting, local in-jokes, and iconic impressions, it’s a signature HMS Squares takeover.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[C]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[B]

What the hell is wrong with you to be Phoenix mascara?

[C]

There we go.

[B]

Hey, we just found out it was Thriller's birthday yesterday. Happy birthday. And this conversation happened one year ago? Yeah, that you've worked here for like a decade or more. And they have this big wall, this whiteboard we write everyone's birthdays on as they come up. Yours never shows up.

[C]

Well, yeah, I think it's been fixed now though, right?

[B]

No, I walk by it every day. I'm the one who erases the day.

[A]

Maybe you're looking for Thriller.

[B]

No, I know his name is Corey. Oh, it is. Yeah, I know that.

[C]

Use a real name. It's sad if you use a real.

[B]

Name, but somebody would put in parentheses. Thriller, Right.

[C]

Maybe this is garbage.

[A]

No, they wouldn't Remember New. Emily is new, so she doesn't.

[B]

Emily never did it. Emily was here for years. She.

[A]

She got kind of guilted into it after a while.

[B]

His name has never been on the board of Birth.

[C]

She's probably, you know, being so new. If it's downstairs. I never See it anyway, so it's fine.

[B]

It doesn't matter.

[A]

Have you met her yet?

[B]

No. Look, it's not for you, okay? You know your birthday?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, but you, John Gordon, who else was. Never got in a PS5.

[C]

That's why four or five people. It was funny.

[B]

Had I walked by for the last few weeks, I'd been like, oh, Cory's birthday's coming up. I just found out today. It was yesterday.

[C]

It was.

[A]

See, look at that. This broad's mom offers her up for your birthday and you deny it. What a prick.

[B]

This is kismet.

[C]

I don't get my own birthday gifts. I'm not getting my own.

[B]

It's kismet, I tell you. Get a picture yet? No. No. You're still on that one yet? It's kismet that on your birthday, she sends over just her daughter birthday cake for you to just devour. No. Well, she stares at the ceiling, goes, fine, that's fine, fine, fine. That's nice. That's fine.

[C]

That'll do. I'm really hoping for a that'll do one of these days.

[B]

That's good.

[C]

Is that a Bears fan? What is that?

[B]

She gives you a little thumbs up. We're good here. Anyway, we'll get you in on this.

[C]

All right?

[B]

You're dating that girl.

[C]

At least do the first pitch. That sounds like fun.

[B]

We'll do the first. Bitch. You're going to do that girl. You're going to do a date with that girl.

[C]

Okay. I was like, let's not promise that.

[B]

Mom says it's okay. Whoo. Wow, Thriller. You get too weird about this. Making me nervous. He's got, like, a DNA thing. It's time now for birthday boy to host these squares and get us out of here on this Friday and move forward for the weekend. Here he is from kdos, even though you're not really on the air. It's Corey Thriller Walsh, everybody. Thriller.

[C]

Thank you, Chancellor. Let's begin. Top left, square. Darth Vader to start things off. How you doing?

[B]

I'm doing well, Corey. Earlier this week, we started my brand new venture. Oh, dear. Which was Brett Say it out loud. The Death Star Comedy Jam. That's right. Sorry, I couldn't get it off. We're gonna have all sorts of people come up, like Kill Tony, only it's called Kill Chewie. And you have one minute to make Chewie laugh. We start with a guy who comes from the. Hey, hey, I'm a D. What? What is that? What's what? That. I'm not Familiar. Anyway, don't interrupt the host.

[A]

Keep going, Darth.

[B]

Yeah. Thank you, Brady. What's wrong with him? Anyway, welcome to the Death Star. Bring up your first guest. My first guest is all the way from the Andromeda section of the space whatever his name is.

[C]

Si.

[B]

Snoodles, let's bring him out here. Sigh. Let's see if you can kill Chewie. Oh, Dee Dee. Nope, that's a Jawa impression. Excellent work though. You can work on it. The Death Star Comedy Jam coming soon. Sorry. Close up the show. Close up. Listen, here comes a guy. He calls himself Luke Skycracker. Let's see what he's got for everybody here today. Luke Skycracker. Ewoks be shopping. Hey, I just got a new ride. You want to see it? It's a Hellcat TIE fighter. That's right.

[C]

Sweet ride.

[B]

Check it out, man.

[C]

Where'd you get it?

[B]

Like the Dodge dealership in. What did you think? Started playing with that one for a second. Okay, that's enough of me.

[C]

All right, no worries. Thank you for your time, sir.

[B]

Gotta go get some smokes.

[C]

Okay, over. Now, top middle, square.

[B]

Gotta get milk. What? Amidala's what? Pregnant with twins. Gotta get milk. Alrighty.

[C]

Now, over, top middle. We got Dave Mustaine up next.

[B]

Yeah, I was on your station earlier this week.

[C]

Yeah, you got any glitches?

[B]

There's my son. My daddy can shred. Little Dave. We shrimp. We were on earlier with Shannon and you know what he tried to do? Ask questions off the pre approved list of questions for me. What a dummy. Gotta read the questions I wrote for myself. Hello, me. It's me with a question. Go ahead me, I'll answer it. Shannon thought he was a star. What do you like most about being Dave? Being Dave? Yeah. It was the best interview he's ever done. And I write my own questions. Little insight. Then we asked a few of those. What's your favorite lunch? Sushi with Holmberg. When I can tell him that he shouldn't shred on me because I can still shred.

[C]

Well, I guess. You look happy. That's good to hear.

[B]

I got what I needed out. I should just do the interview myself and send it to people.

[C]

That'd be more convenient.

[B]

You know what my favorite cereal is? No, what's that? Me. Shredded Wheat. Cause it shreds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hello, me. It's the Dave Mustaine interview with Dave Mustaine.

[C]

Well, I don't want to bother you here, so let's go on over to the top right square. President Trump, how are you?

[B]

Sir, I'm doing great. Yeah, I'm doing great. I am making a deal for Greenland right now. Great deal.

[A]

You're the peacemaker.

[B]

That's right. I'm a peacemaker. Or else.

[A]

Piece of ice maker.

[B]

I love a piece of ice. A good piece of ice. Brett knows. Piece of ice. I like it. I made it. Deal for. For. Was it green? Glendale. I don't know what I'm getting here.

[A]

Something up there.

[B]

But there's 56,000 little Inuits. One little, two little, three.

[A]

Oh, no. Did you count them all out?

[B]

Piece of ice. They all love you and they all love me. They're. They're socialists. But we're going to change all that. We're going to send me up there, okay? And I'm getting. I'm going to win the Nobel Peace Prize. And if not, I'm going to kill every last Greenlandian Inuit there is. I'll kill them all if I don't win.

[A]

She said, they.

[B]

Daddy Peace pr. They always call me Daddy. I'm Daddy. I went up and they said, daddy, please. And I said, you got it, Greenland. But don't. Don't with me. Look at that. It's a great piece of. Somebody already made a Hellcat TIE fighter. That's impressive. Oh, man, it's an amazing. I would drive that. I really like that picture that you're showing. Hellcat with the TIE fighter on the. Great. Really nice. That was fast. That's my whip.

[A]

Sir.

[B]

I always like him. He's a great leader. Darth Vader. A lot of people say, not a good guy. Look at what he's gotten done.

[A]

Yeah, he's.

[C]

He's a lot of work done.

[B]

Real estate. I mean, the guy. Unbelievable. You blew up his building. Like two years later, he's almost done building it again and bigger.

[A]

You call Daddy.

[B]

I call him Darth Daddy. That's right. He's the big daddy. Anyway, Greenland Peace Prize coming your way. All right. I'll kill every little mother on that island. I swear to God.

[C]

All right, now we got the middle of square. Jay Leno up next.

[B]

How are you feeling? You know, I'm up there at the Barrett Jackson this weekend. I'm doing my Barrett Jackson walk. I'm walking around up looking at cards I've never had a Ferrari for.

[A]

I look good.

[B]

I think I look pretty good. What about a Hellcat? I don't like hellcats too much. Something about me inside a Hellcat is like. I feel like the frosting inside an Oreo. It's like I just don't feel like I fit in there very well. So anyway, no, I'm just. I'm feeling pretty good. I'm wandering around doing my thing. No, no, I got my footing. Brady. I'm not on any hill now. Brady's got me thinking about falling. Here we go.

[C]

Get you in a wheelchair.

[B]

Gotten a little older, but I'm walking around a nice wheelchair chair I've got for the fire and I landed on a muffler and burned my face off. But I'll be over at Barrett Jackson over there at the Bear Jackson muffler. You got to bounce up on one. A lot of those people have their cause underneath there. You been to the Barrett Jackson. You see that the way to act like you know the cause. If you could even lay down under a car, I think everybody's going to sit there. I just fell down, hit my face on. Anyway, I'll be out there. I'm going to bid on everything. So if you guys want it, it's going to be mine in the end.

[A]

I'll see you out there.

[C]

Brady.

[B]

You're going to go out there?

[A]

Oh, I'm going to.

[C]

All right.

[B]

You'll see me. I'm the one in denim. Oh, all right.

[A]

I'll keep an eye out.

[C]

All right. You told me to the center square. We got geography. Grady.

[B]

Grady. Hey, Grady.

[C]

Grady.

[B]

How you doing?

[A]

Geography.

[B]

Grady. Geography.

[A]

Grady.

[B]

I was working on my studio.

[C]

Do you have any idea where we are? Apparently I don't.

[B]

I know I am. I got the GPS track on my ass. I'm geography graduated.

[A]

You're above sea level right now, right?

[B]

I'm right at sea level. And you look up where the sea at sea going. So how tall is that? The sea level? Zero. It's at zero. Zero is the sea level what everything's about. I'm about six feet above sea level. Okay, just a little bit of that. Five foot seven. I'm. I'm geography. Geography. Greater Brittany. You want to know what somebody did that mean? Well, that's all about the raising cane.

[C]

Yeah, it's me.

[B]

Where? Ask me. Ask me where you want. Where you going live today? The Thriller.

[C]

I'm gonna go downtown Chandler for dinner.

[B]

Oh, yeah, I know. What are you gonna go into that raising case? He goes bulj Bojang Aluminum. About four miles from the boj.

[C]

Oh, do they?

[B]

Where are you gonna go to dinner tonight?

[C]

Cooper's Hawk, actually.

[B]

Cooper's Hawk. Wine.

[A]

No churches, no birds and such.

[B]

I know where that is.

[C]

Okay, I'll take your word for it.

[B]

Geography. Grady knows that the place you're going is in Chandler. Cuz you told me. Yes, and the Grady part kills me. Yeah, it is Grady. It's different than the Grady. It's a Grady. It's a gritty Brady, and yet the same. Somehow they just blend together.

[A]

You brought Lamont Holmes with you?

[B]

He's gonna be over at the Chicken's Nest at the Chicken Hawk.

[C]

What do you call that?

[B]

Foghorn Leghorn. He gonna have his birthday, celebrate himself. Let's get out there and make everybody whoops. Hey, you too.

[C]

Is the store out of batteries? What's going on here?

[B]

Holy all birds. Morning sickness.

[C]

Disgusting. They smell, they're sticky. They say things that are horrible.

[A]

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[B]

It's John Holmer here from the Morning Sickness. And it's time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and Doug hopkins.com have you ever thought to yourself, I'm going to sell my house? Of course you have. And one reason or another, you just didn't do it. Probably because it's a hassle when you try to make a real estate deal. What if I could say, you can sell that house the day after you say the words, I want to sell my house. Doug's been at this for over 25 years, and that's why he's still on top of the Hill. TVs Doug Hopkins can handle everything. Won't move the price or you get $5,000. What do you do? Start the process right now@doug hopkins.com or grab the phone and sing Hopkins 1-800-sale now. Holmberg's Morning Sickness.

[C]

All right, then over to the middle right square. Jason Statham here.

[B]

That's right. I'm only here just because there's no reason. I was just driving fast through your city and I heard and I said, I know these guys.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

So I decided to stop over and be how the bees.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

You got me excited about that. They're doing well, Betty. Thanks for asking. The Bees are doing great. Yeah. Oh, no. I brought some money for Brady.

[C]

Yes, for that.

[A]

Is that a Hellcat Hornet out there?

[B]

That's a Hellcat Hornet. That's right. I'm not allowed in that here. Yeah. Yeah, it looks funny in that one, too. It's like a double stuff if you got in it with me. That's right. But it goes very fast. But I don't need that to go very fast. I'm very fast on my own.

[C]

All right.

[B]

A new movie coming out.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Beekeeper 2. This time it's personal.

[A]

Really.

[C]

The bees.

[B]

Now we've got a little. We've got a little vendetta to pay back Frank Honeycomb. That's right.

[C]

That's my name.

[B]

Frank Honeycomb. You know, that's how it is. I'll drive very fast. Who's going to get them? Happy birthday, Thriller. Oh, thank you, Frank Honeycomb. I know. I'm with Bread on that Frank Honeycomb line. Yeah, that's funny. But is it that? Is it. Everybody gets tickets. Let's leave.

[A]

Time to go.

[C]

All right, now, what's that noise? Bottom left square here, Brady. Secret square. Give us a hint.

[B]

Thanks for having me in, gentlemen. I'm 75 years old. I saved 154 souls on January 15, 2009, because I landed my plane in the Hudson River.

[C]

All right, It's a hero.

[B]

Okay, that should do it, right?

[C]

Straight enough. Scorpions.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is that the guy? Is that. Who did that?

[C]

All right, now we got the bottom middle here. Howard Stern. Hello, sir.

[B]

Yeah, I got brought up on the show earlier this week. Homer gets called as a. A cheap imitation. No, he doesn't. I don't know what you're talking about. You got this cripple kid on the show. You got Red Robin. You got Breadlejuice. You've got Baba Bastard. I mean, how in the world is this show any like. It's completely different. I mean, in other words, it's a different show, is what I'm saying. Whatever you say, Howard. Yeah, that's exactly right. And that's how we should do it around here. That's exactly the phrase. It pays right there. That's right. The golden asshole has spoken. The golden asshole has spoken. And that's all we need to know. Yeah. No, I'm going to take off spring and summer this year and still get $35 million. And you can feel my finger inside of all radio guys. But that just kills everybody. It's between me and Beth. No, I'll v. I vab with Beth, though. She takes it. And Beth does two months off at a time as well.

[A]

McDonald.

[B]

Yeah. How did he. Not. My Beth. Yeah. Kez's. Yeah. The other Beth. Yeah. She's the poor man's best. Homberg's. The poor man's stern. And she's the poor man's my best. Oh, yeah. Anyway, how about Beth vabbing? Holy Red Robin. Do you like to vap? Where do you like to rub your vap juice? Yum. Right?

[C]

All right.

[B]

Now, do you want to go out with Red Robin? The Thriller will pay for it. You'll be able to resist her. I just think you should take chances. A blind date is a good idea for you. She doesn't need to see.

[C]

I'll do it. If you do it, I'll nail.

[B]

I'll nail the. The mentally challenged kid.

[A]

A neurodivergent.

[B]

She's gonna be very focused.

[C]

That's a good album title.

[B]

Yeah. You can wander around jerking off all the time. You get this. Why don't you get this mentally challenged kid to do it? Okay.

[C]

Oh, no, no, no.

[B]

What's wrong with that? No, no. Come on. Nobody else is doing it. Yeah, you got the offer. Just take her up on it.

[C]

What's wrong with you? There might be a reason.

[B]

There might be a reason. What, that you don't get hard for a girl's hands? What if she spits a neurodivergent spit in her poem? Oh, I was already imagining she's ugly.

[C]

Yeah, that's nasty.

[B]

What's nasty about it? You watch porn. You spit. Starts doing math with her left hand while she's working with her right hand. She's, like, solving equations.

[C]

Toothpicks.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. She's counting toothpicks. She drops on the ground. Yeah. Driving a Chrysler 300 in the driveway and working.

[A]

Judge Wapner.

[B]

Yeah, she got Wapner on at 12:30. People's Court. You keep it on there. You keep the people's court. You get it from behind. Let her watch tv. All right.

[C]

Maybe he can save me here. Bottom line square. Our lord and savior, Tripp Reeve. How are you, sir?

[B]

I'm not saving anything. I like this idea. You should get a hand job from that crippled kid. Not happening anywhere else.

[C]

I need advice, sir. Would you do this?

[A]

No.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Because I don't have. Right. But you do. You know who else could use a hand?

[C]

Who's that?

[B]

Larry. Maybe the R word could get both of you like she's cross country skiing.

[A]

She's not our word.

[B]

Kinda. I don't know how it works over there. I just know she's not normal. It wouldn't have gotten mentioned. Trip makes a good point. Like, if she was normal, you wouldn't say she wasn't. So let's get googly eyes in here and see what she can do.

[C]

All right, hop on the board.

[B]

We better hurry.

[C]

Oh, let's see what we got. Betty and Chris.

[B]

Who?

[A]

Betty and Chris.

[B]

Betty and Chris. Betty, are you there? I am Here. Chris, are you there? I am. All right. Betty, you're a girl. Go. All right, let's start with this secret square. Sully. Oh, she knows.

[C]

Sully. Straight up.

[B]

Did it quick. Nice job, Betty.

[C]

All right, over to Chris here. Make your choice.

[B]

I'll do geography. Brady. In the middle now. Come on, now.

[C]

Geography.

[B]

Grady. Now Geography Brady. Grady Grogan. Where you at right now, Chris? At my house. Where is that house at, geographically speaking? Good year. Oh, that. New and good year. New and good year. Another G. There's another. Is he ain't good? You're eating bug eyes. All right, I messed that up. Geography. Where do you live there, Thom?

[C]

I'm over in Phoenix.

[B]

Oh, Phoenix. Let's see. That's. Yes. You're in Phoenix. Then that's a geographer.

[C]

He's so good at you.

[B]

By booty's wings. Your clothes are booty's wings. What direction is that? That way. Geography speaking.

[C]

All right. Got a question for you.

[B]

I'm Grady Grogan. Geography. I mean, I run a geography bee. I'm a geography beekeeper like Jason Statham, only with the. With the. With the places.

[A]

Where's South Mountain?

[B]

Put a pin in it. Oh, okay. It's right back there. It's a big one.

[A]

Yeah, I mean south, right?

[C]

He's right.

[B]

Unless you're down south of that. Then it's North Mountain.

[A]

Well, there you go.

[B]

How can south Tucson. It's become north. Okay. Anyway, Geography, Brady. Can't help everybody.

[C]

Yeah, very busy. Photography, Brady.

[B]

I said Grady.

[A]

Brady.

[C]

Grady.

[B]

Go on now.

[C]

All right. People who are swear tend to be more dishonest than those who do not.

[B]

Oh, that's crazy. You the most honest, most animated world, Brett. You just move where you move to Mesa. It's right over there. Go to hell.

[C]

Not a fan of Mesa.

[B]

You say people swear more dishonest?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

I don't know what that be. Oh, if I swear to you, that means I'm lying? Yes. So if I say I, your wife means you're Lying. That means I'm not telling you the truth.

[C]

No way.

[B]

If I say I didn't your wife, you better look out geography. Grady did not do that. I'll say that's probably true.

[C]

Okay, you're saying true there now, Chris, do you agree or disagree with true? I'll agree.

[A]

Incorrect.

[C]

Then X gets the square.

[B]

Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

[C]

Betty could take Trump for the win here.

[B]

You know it. Let's go. President Trump. That's right. I can tell Betty's a big fan. Probably has a picture above her fireplace of me with a bloody ear. Fight, fight, fight. That's what I said.

[C]

With or without clothes?

[B]

With a flag. Maybe she's done a little altering and taken out the cat for you. Oh, Black Betty. She's probably. She's probably a black. They love me. They love me. The blacks love me.

[A]

Does Darth Vader love you?

[B]

Darth Vader and Geography Grady both. I did vote for him. Take it for what it's worth. Did we sell your whip? You ever live with a black woman? We still ain't gonna let one president. I had to vote for the white man. I told you they love me. Isn't that right, Black Betty? You know it. That's right. You know it. You can hear it in a voice. She's basically a member of Salt and Pepper. She's like Spinderella. I know that.

[C]

All right, I got a question for you here, Sir.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Approximately 20% of all cell phones in use have been dropped in the toilet or urinal.

[B]

2 out of 10. 2 out of 10 cell phones have been in the pee and the poo. And that's worldwide. Yes. So that number includes India. Ooh, those are made of pee and poop in India. I think that's probably true. 20% is a pretty low number when you start counting in the Indians. Yes.

[C]

Okay, you're seeing children.

[B]

Very true, Very true. They're mostly all poop.

[C]

All right, now, Betty for the win here, possibly. Do you agree or disagree with true?

[B]

I am going to have to agree. Correct.

[C]

X gets the squeeze and the win.

[B]

Baron dropped his phone in the dumper once. You think he'll get it away? Took it away from him for a little while. His long arms went all the way down to the P trap he got stuck to. We got him in. There we go. Okay, now. But, yeah, don't drop your phone in the poopy. The Phoenix Open or Barrett Jackson or anywhere else. Just leave it. Not that important. All right, I'm off to kill Greenland. He's quick on that and gotta kill those people.

[A]

He's on a mission.

[B]

Gotta get that peace prize by killing those folks. That's it. We're done, huh?

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Holy cow. Three day work weeks are awesome.

[A]

Oh man. I mean I even look how focused Brady was. I know.

[B]

Well, that's not graded off of Grady.

[A]

Grady was doing good.

[B]

Good. What? Let's see. I'm gonna go the raising canes. We will bojangles. Geographically speaking, of course. Which is this way and that away.

[C]

Oh man.

[B]

What are you. Your birthday. Happy birthday. You're going out to the chicken's wren.

[C]

Is what you called it? Cooper's hawk.

[B]

Cooper's hawk. All right. And you're gonna drink wine?

[C]

Probably a glass.

[B]

Yeah. Do you want a. A special friend to join you?

[C]

What kind of special?

[B]

I told you, she's neurobaib special. I got a special friend. Well, for the lady and her special daughter.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. That want to meet at what time you going to cooperate?

[C]

I'm not telling you all this.

[B]

5:36 o'. Clock. Get there, hang around from 5:6. And first kid that waddles in with the big limp, that's Corey.

[A]

When does the women's basketball game get over?

[C]

There's not one today.

[B]

Keep in mind she wanted to date you sight unseen.

[C]

She doesn't even know what it looked like.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

So we're both lying to each other.

[B]

Whoa. Wow. Son of a bitch. See if I ever try to get you blown again.

[C]

I'm an adult, so I can handle myself.

[B]

I know that you've been doing too much of it. That's why we're trying to help. We're done. You guys have yourselves a fantastic neurodivergent weekend. And we'll see you on Monday right here in the morning sickness. Larry's next. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station. It's John Holmberg here and it's time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and Doug Hopkins dot com. 2026. Brand new year. That usually means every one of us says something like this is the year I blank. And then we insert some strange goal. Let me tell you this. Most of the time you're not going to do it. This year I'm going to call TV's Doug Hawkins. He will buy your home as is. You can start eyeballing houses that are already upgraded. So fresh starts for 2026 are waiting for you at your keyboard. Start the process right now online Doug hopkins.com or sing Hopkins 1 800, sale now. It's John Holmberg. Here seeing clear as a bell. Thanks to my friends at the Schwartz Laser Eye Center. Well, here we are looking at a brand new year. Can you see yourself in 2026? Can you see it all? I mean, really, maybe in 20,026 you should see yourself seeing. Fix those eyes. Vision changes are gradual. You might not even know how bad it's gotten. I know. That was my story. So start the new year by seeing clearly. Visit Dr. J. Schwartz and his team at the Schwartz laser eye center. 4, 8, oh. 4, 8, 3. Eyes. Schwartz laser eye Center. The official eye center for your Diamondbacks and sons.