Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness (98KUPD)

Episode: 01-27-26 – ASU Tops STD Rate Polls & Toledo’s Denim-Making Son
Date: January 27, 2026
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Main Theme Overview

This episode blends irreverent humor with local flavor as the crew discusses two viral polls placing Arizona State University (ASU) at the top of national college STD rate rankings, and shares a lively update on Toledo’s son’s ongoing (and surprisingly complex) denim jean-making hobby. The episode is packed with playful banter, good-natured ribbing, and a touch of Arizona pride.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. ASU’s Notorious Return to the Top of STD Polls

[00:39 – 05:05]

• ASU ranked #1 in student STD rates according to two recent national polls. The hosts joke that this marks a return to the university's “party school” glory days.
• Holmberg recalls when ASU dominated headlines for being fun and wild rather than academically elite. He links this new ranking with the resurgence of the football program’s success, joking about the correlation:
  • “Football got good again. STD rates shot through the roof. You get a good football team, and your college campus becomes more fun.” – John Holmberg [01:07]
• They humorously discuss ASU sending cease and desist letters to outlets reporting the stats, and mock the seriousness of STDrankings.
• Other schools ranking high include Iowa, Florida State, Alabama, and Auburn—but ASU reigns supreme. University of Arizona comes in at 17th.
• Brief discussion on the poll’s methodology and how ASU’s large student body may influence the numbers.
• Side note about community colleges, with tongue-in-cheek comments about students’ “bad decisions in high school” leading to MCC (Mesa Community College) enrollment.

Notable quote:

“Let’s put ASU back on the map… Good for you, ASU. I’m proud of you.” – John Holmberg [01:46]

2. The Evolving Reputation of ASU

[02:30 – 03:24]

• The hosts reminisce on ASU’s past reputation with references to “Playboy’s Tempe 12” and the school’s former party culture.
• They contrast this with the school’s more recent academic focus and celebrate the return to notoriety.

3. Curing Hepatitis C & Medical Advancements

[04:01 – 04:39]

• The conversation momentarily veers into the progress of medical treatments, particularly how Hepatitis C is now easily curable:
  • “I was talking to a doctor the other day. He goes, hep C? … Come in now. I can get rid of it in a weekend.” – John Holmberg [04:04]

4. Toledo’s Son: The Denim Jean Saga

[05:28 – 09:55]

• A running bit updates listeners on Toledo’s son, who continues making his own jeans at home, complete with various (and unfinished) closures.
• Playful ribbing about whether he’s attending college and if he’ll ever get good at making jeans—especially the all-important “button.”
• The team imagines giving away a pair of “Toledo custom jeans” as a radio contest prize, with the catch that winners must wear the unfinished, rope-belted pants in public.
• Banter about his “DIY” approaches, including suggestions to make jeans that come with all buckles/attachments separate in the pocket for users to pick-and-finish themselves.
• The hosts reference the urge for parents to both push their kids out of the house and hope they’ll stick around.

Memorable quotes:

• “He’s making pants—but he can’t get the button right.” – John Holmberg [06:14]
• “These are Appalachian pants that have no button. You just tie a rope around it.” – John Holmberg [06:24]
• “Death row Clampett pants.” – John Holmberg [08:56]
• “I've never been happier to be childless.” – John Holmberg [11:14]

5. Parenting, College, and Kids Leaving the House

[09:59 – 12:51]

• Discussion on how Toledo’s son “talks about” but isn’t enrolled in community college—contrasting fantasy with reality in ambitions.
• Hilarious sendup of parental aspirations versus young adult realities (“A father can dream.” – Co-host, [07:55]).
• Discussion turns sentimental and teasing as the hosts talk about Brady’s daughter Kirby potentially attending university abroad—and how emotionally challenging it will be for him.
• Ribbing that Brady will be lost without his daughter, imagining him haunting high schools or “calling in from Berlin.”

Notable moments:

• “He wants it as much as he wants his two-year associate’s from MCC. He’s not doing anything about it.” – John Holmberg [11:37]
• “You’re just gonna be hanging around high schools looking for girls that look like her and just want to be her dad.” – John Holmberg [12:53]

6. Light-hearted Closers & Familial Teasing

[12:51 – 13:37]

• The hosts end with more teasing about finding substitute “kids” and a farcical quip about crafting a noose from one of the famous rope belts.

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

| Timestamp | Quote | Speaker | |-----------|-------|---------| | 01:07 | “Football got good again. STD rates shot through the roof. You get a good football team, and your college campus becomes more fun.” | John Holmberg | | 01:46 | “Let’s put ASU back on the map… Good for you, ASU. I’m proud of you.” | John Holmberg | | 04:04 | “I was talking to a doctor the other day. He goes, hep C? … Come in now. I can get rid of it in a weekend.” | John Holmberg | | 06:14 | “He’s making pants—but he can’t get the button right.” | John Holmberg | | 06:24 | “These are Appalachian pants that have no button. You just tie a rope around it.” | John Holmberg | | 08:56 | “Death row Clampett pants.” | John Holmberg | | 11:14 | “I've never been happier to be childless.” | John Holmberg | | 07:55 | “A father can dream.” | Co-host | | 11:37 | “He wants it as much as he wants his two-year associate’s from MCC. He’s not doing anything about it.” | John Holmberg | | 12:53 | “You’re just gonna be hanging around high schools looking for girls that look like her and just want to be her dad.” | John Holmberg |

Segment Timestamps

• ASU STD Polls & Reactions: [00:39] – [05:05]
• ASU’s Party Rep & Playboy Nostalgia: [02:30] – [03:24]
• Medical Progress with Hep C: [04:01] – [04:39]
• Toledo’s Denim-Making Son: [05:28] – [09:55]
• Parents, College, and Empty-Nest Parenting: [09:59] – [12:51]
• Final Laughs & Teasing: [12:51] – [13:37]

Tone & Takeaways

The episode delivers its trademark blend of sarcastic wit, Arizona pride, and relatable parental ribbing. Whether debating ASU’s “honor” of topping STD charts or playfully despairing over a son who can’t finish jeans properly, the hosts balance affectionate mockery with community-centric humor. If you’ve ever relished irreverent morning radio or empathized with bumbling through young adulthood (as a parent or a kid), this episode hits home.