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Brett Vesely
You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. Hey, it's Brett Vesely and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?
Byron
Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into M and P Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wrong hands.
Brett Vesely
Okay, but what if he lives out of state?
Byron
Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it. It's really that simple.
Brett Vesely
There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms.
Johnny
Come on down to the Ranch House Grill. Comfort food is your next meal.
Ranch House Grill Announcer
Pork chili verde, chicken fried steak.
Johnny
Ranch House knows you'll think it's great.
Ranch House Grill Announcer
Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House Grill has been voted best breakfast four years in a row. We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions. Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven days a week, 6am to 2pm We're a family restaurant with a small town atmosphere serving southwestern comfort food for 18 years. Come on down to the Ranch House Grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix at 56th street and Thomas Road.
Holmberg
Holmberg's morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.
Johnny
And I want to talk to you about something that's very personal. Your body.
Orko
Remember, it's your body and no one should touch you in a way that you feel is wrong to anybody who tries it. It's not that easy, Orko. It's hard for a young person to admit that he or she has been touched in a bad way.
Johnny
If you've been touched that way, don't be ashamed. Tell someone you trust, like your parents, your doctor, your teacher or counselor, or your minister or rabbi.
Orko
Right, Arco?
Nicole
Right.
Orko
Walker told me I have aids.
Johnny
Is this homebug contestant of the day here on the Price is Right?
Nicole
Nicole, slap down.
Johnny
This still shouldn't be a thing. It never gets old. It's terrible.
Brett Vesely
Don't make fun of her name.
Johnny
They did that. My favorite part of that is Brett just didn't hear it. He looked her up and found her.
Brett Vesely
I tried to add her as a friend on Instagram.
Johnny
And that's what me. She said no. Yeah, she knew.
Brady
Did she win? I can't remember.
Johnny
Well, Brady, it doesn't matter. And maybe she wins. In my book, she's a life winner. She's made it this far with that last name. But the. Then we found out that all the people in on Price is Right during COVID were actors. Because that's what she was. She was an actress who. They didn't pull you out of the crowd. Then everybody's got their theories about zips, man. Everybody says. And there's some good ones. This guy says, google the owner's divorce. This dude and his wife are going 15 rounds in court for the last 10 years because they've got a lot of money to split. I suspect the wife went for the financial jugular here Says. Also, I recently have gotten a lot of calls coming to me about approved loans and documents ready to be signed. I just thought it was a scam. But all my credit card information is well known at the zip, so it got me curious. Maybe one of those deals. This one says, john, you're absolutely right. There's something else going on up here in Northern Arizona. We had an HSI raid at the Colt Grill chain nationwide due to drugs and child trafficking. Everybody's just nuts over immigration and political buzzwords. But there could be a seriously ominous reason why that was rated the way it was. For example, maybe some employees had an idea to fly planes into a military installation like they did in the USS Arizona. You know, Zips, like, all right, not caring mostly equates to being carefree. Yeah, but not. And I agree with that. Not caring. It doesn't mean being ignorant. Be aware, don't care. That's my message. If I was dressed up as, like, a bear, I'd be at elementary school. Hey, kids, be aware, but don't care. If I can give you any sage advice as a guy getting up there.
Brady
The Jay Cutler bear.
Johnny
I'm comfortable in my own shoes. Yeah, but you understand what's going on. Stay. Oh, he's just. I'm the Chuck Pal Bear. Stay aware of current events, but don't care. Stay for the laughs. Yeah, I said. And there's the other thing. Is that why does the news cover these kids who leave high school in these walkouts? I'm as wide as they come. And I would have walked right out of class. They gave me the opportunity to protest, and I'd have protested anything. Back then. Freedom for whites would have been like, we're marching out of something. We're leaving school. Like, yep. What for? Freedom for whites. We're against it. Like, I'm going outside. I don't want to be here anymore.
Brett Vesely
What for? It doesn't matter.
Johnny
Don't care. So think about Tempe Tavern. Have them call up the guys from Zips and go, here's how you get out of this. They've been raided a couple times. They're still open.
Brett Vesely
I was there last weekend.
Johnny
Were you really?
Brett Vesely
Yeah, yeah. Went in there on trolling Friday night. Yeah, it was empty. There was like five people in there.
Johnny
Oh, really?
Brett Vesely
Yeah.
Johnny
See that place has got. How the doors, how they didn't change the name is beyond.
Brett Vesely
I went in, I was like, is that place still even open? And we went in.
Johnny
I'm like, okay. Yeah. This guy says, you'd think Tucson would be in the news every night with Ice Stories. But they sit quietly with the number one basketball team in America, 21. And oh, what's down there in Tucson in the way. Here's the thing about Tucson and ICE though. You have sometimes look at your garage and go. Or a closet and stuff. And you're like, I gotta clean this. But Jesus Christ, we'll do that one last. Get to this later. This is gonna be all day. Tucson's gonna take forever when they get that. Yeah, I'm not interested in that. That seems like an awful lot. And then a guy emailed me and said, where'd it go? He just talked to his lawyer friend yesterday about this and he goes, what's going on? And he said, I'll be. As the attorney, I'll tell you this. A few things can be deduced from the information that we've got. First off, absolute biggest nugget of information that this was a coordinated 15 location raid at one establishment by Homeland Security. They're distinct from enforcement and removal operations. ERO is ultimately enforcing civil immigration matters even when they do raids on multiple locations. Hsi, on the other hand, is the same rank as deafbi. They really don't care about the fact anyone is documented or not. If they're involved, it's about who's getting paid. In other words, I'd be happy to bet anyone that this was an operation targeting the owners and corporate entity that owns zips. I would bet the investigation's been going on for at least a year, if not more. I'm guessing you're going to see in the coming days felony federal charges like money laundering, document fraud and violations of the Immigration Control and Reform Act. That'll be against the owners and corporate entity that owns the restaurant. That's his guess as a lawyer.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
But the reason I read that is because I'm sure hoping that people don't just watch what's going on and want their Instagram feeds to fill up with how active they are and make this about something that it isn't. Wait for the dust to settle before you go out there and get pepper balled over what turns out to be some owner that was laundering money. Has nothing to do with why you're angry. Nah.
Brett Vesely
Go get pepper balled. I want to see it.
Johnny
But if you do, if you do, be sure to have your Instagram feed rolling. Absolutely. Like that broad that tried to pick up a flashbang in Minnesota. I don't know which side she was on, but she's running around screaming, medic. Like she's in a war zone, like, what? The medics aren't here. What are you talking about? Medic. Medic. You watch Saving Private Ryan last night?
Brett Vesely
I don't think Hawkeye is going to show up anytime soon.
Johnny
I was in the shower watching Margaret. I don't think that you scream medic unless you, like, she. They literally think they're like, a military operation, has got a medic's tent, and, like, you know, they're gonna evacu and I chopper. No, you coordinated assault, picked up a flashbang, you moron, and it blew up and knocked your fingers off. Be aware. Don't care. See where Karen gets you crazy. Look at it and go, this is ridiculous. Wants for dinner, not zips. Here's stuff. You just be aware. Just know that what's going on and. And calm down. Here's a fun one. And, Brady, you should know about this. This happened in your hood. See that dude in Gilbert?
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
That was drugging his wife.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
And then letting dudes come over and have sex with her.
Brady
What? And, yeah. Multiple pictures, loads of them.
Johnny
And Reddit ads. He'd knock her out and go on Reddit and go, all right, we got about an hour and a half. Anybody in? And they'd show up. I don't know what's worse, the dude drugging her or the guys in the car on the way over.
Brady
And then her finally discovering, I don't think something's right here.
Johnny
She's the one who called the cops. She found his Reddit ads. That's how she. That's how he got busted. He left his computer on the Reddit.
Brady
Sleep for a long time.
Johnny
Her ass always hurt. And she's like, oh, and she turned the computer on to like do some Pinterest. And the next thing you know she's got like, wait, a ticket. That's my ass. And I have been extra sleepy. Yeah. Dude is. I think we maybe have to put him into the category of like our first one of the year.
Brady
Yeah, that would be a shame.
Johnny
But I don't know who to put in there.
Brady
Shame him or the 15 others.
Johnny
The dudes that rolled over to the house. Like the Nathan Sutherlands of the world that came by. I mean, this is a sinner comes.
Holmberg
Before you and begged for forgiveness.
Johnny
Yeah, I. I don't.
Brett Vesely
All the above.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
I think.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
I'm pretty sure all of it applies here. We don't have the names of the other guys, but you know, she. She called the cops and she's like, I went through my husband's phone and there were pictures of me and they were asking if they want to have sex with this. And people showed up and they arrested another guy too. But. So the investigation was in December. She contacted the cops. She's using her husband's phone now. If you are. Look, I don't want to defend this guy or give him hints or clues, but Brett, in the future, if you're selling your sleepy wife for sex and she says, can I see your phone for a second? No, no.
Brett Vesely
You have a burner.
Johnny
You have a burner.
Brett Vesely
What are you doing?
Johnny
What are you doing? Letting that be the day to day phone first off. Boo says anyway, she's using her phone like sensors, transactions through jitterbug. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Or just pigeons like be smart. He's 38 years old and she's found it. It was in October and so she reported and found. Found the photos and video of her being sexually assaulted by guys she's never seen before. She had no memory of any of it. According to the documents, the victim was hesitant to come forward because of her husband was like, look, I'll take the kids and say, you're in on this.
Brady
Yeah. Threaten to take the kids.
Johnny
And the Gilbert cops, they say this is tremendous courage and it is by the woman. This is insane to come forward and this is as bad as it gets. Investigators believe the assaults happened over the course of a year. And he recorded each encounter. And on January 3rd, he was arrested and booked into the thing. 12 charges. And I mean anything you can tag onto this dude. They also arrested a 41 year old man who was allegedly involved in one of them. He was booked on one count of assault. During an interview with detectives, the suspect Reported admitting to using Reddit to message other people to meet up as friends. And then he's like, I needed a lawyer. His name's being withheld, though, so we can't really put him through shame yet. But that was over there in beautiful downtown Gilbert. You probably know that guy. You've probably wandered up to his door and bothered him about something.
Brady
Good guy.
Johnny
Yeah, probably. Yeah. Didn't seem like that. I would have never guessed. I don't have read it.
Brady
I never go on that I was aware.
Brett Vesely
His wife's always sleepy, but, you know, don't care.
Johnny
Okay. I'm keeping out of that. Those are those moments where I'm like, wait, he did what now?
Brady
But when I first. When I saw that over the weekend, I mean, I'm like, where is that?
Johnny
Yeah, you wanted to walk over and meet them. You're busy bodying over to that house.
Brady
It's gotta be in these. It's got to be in the shady parts of Gilbert.
Johnny
You think?
Brady
No, that's what my thought is. But, yeah, you just don't know.
Johnny
I look for that stuff. I look for age, name, and then if I. If, like. And then immediately think, I wonder if he's a listener. Like, those are the. I automatically see criminals and think, I wonder if he's on, like, our Facebook or Instagram. I never look, but I should. Is he following one?
Brady
There was a guy the other day.
Johnny
I'm like, oh, I've seen a couple where I'm like, oh, we lost one. Yeah, we lost one. Yeah, I see that. I don't see a lot of. You know, sometimes. Yeah, no, there's a few. That's pretty obvious. It's like, you might as well just go on the KUPD stickers.
Brett Vesely
Four people already are sympathetic listeners. Was she hot, bro?
Johnny
I see. And that's not good. My first.
Brady
Determine how bad it is.
Johnny
I've gotten to this. I've gotten to this weird stage in my life where I'm like, was I ever at that guy's house? I'm like, I'm clear. What's the story? Like, I don't want to know if it's. Unless it's real close to me. I'm like, all right, do I have to explain anything?
Brady
I've never.
Johnny
I don't think that would be something I'd be. Again, that's an. It's so easy to avoid.
Brady
But to be in a picture, you know, randomly taking a lot of all the pictures you've taken over the years.
Johnny
But never with a incapacitated naked lady that I saw on the Internet and said, I'm going to go over that guy.
Brady
Oh, this would be hilarious.
Brett Vesely
She recognized her own ass.
Johnny
Yeah.
Brett Vesely
Impressive.
Johnny
That's me getting railed in there. And she wasn't picking up. She said I was using my husband's phone. No, you weren't. You were going through it. And good thing. But ladies, don't get all excited and think that we're all doing that and start searching your man's phone. Most of us are not. You know, we're happy when you're asleep. We're not going to rustle that up. We're like, good. A little time. Got a little time. But for. For crying out loud, who? I don't know. I honestly think the dude driving over is even worse than the guy offering it up.
Holmberg
There's something. Something. Check out homework's morning sickness podcast@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness.
Johnny
Like, he's taking. Because they're doing.
Brady
Oh, yeah, and contacting other guys. Going over to dude's house.
Johnny
There was a market for it. That's crazy. Now what is the. I mean, the reward to the risk on that is zero. Hey, I just talked to her.
Brady
You want to bone some guy's wife.
Johnny
Talk to your wife. She's married to a crazy person. There's a good chance she's crazy too. Have a sit down and just say, look, I've been thinking. I want to watch you get nailed by a bunch of dudes. And I know I want to do it legally. Like, and if she says no, then. All right, don't. But don't knock her out. At least give her fair warning because if you have that talk with her and then you still have that wild eyed look and she's gonna go, he's gonna knock me out and do this anyway. At least give her a chance to escape. Crazy.
Brady
But that's a little weird itself because every one of those guys needs to be nailed. I mean, if she's. Oh, yeah, and imagine trying that.
Johnny
How dumb are you? Yeah, like Brady, you and I. I'm like, hey, I got a friend of mine's got his wife passed out. I'm gonna go have sex with her.
Byron
Sure.
Johnny
And then the two of us go over there and the guy starts filming it. We're like throwing thumbs up and like, we're going to jail. Eiffel Tower, no matter what. Like it's. You're only going to enjoy that for a few minutes and then you're going to just. Somebody's going to Find that. Somebody's been lit. Like they said. It's been going on for over a year. Some dude was the first one that, like, you know, just. I'm here about the Reddit ad. Yeah, she's out. You got 20 minutes. Go. All right, scramble back there. I'm just gonna film you. Yeah, that's fine. And he's been living with this for a year, waiting for the other shoe to drop, because you know it's gonna. These creeps need to be like. Like, if you're on the tape banging the incapacitated lady, call me a fascist, but do we really need a court hearing for that?
Brady
Yeah.
Brett Vesely
Diddy got a safe house in Gilbert.
Brady
Now, is that what's going on or what?
Johnny
Isn't that one of those things we can just bring back the guillotine and just go, that dude right there. Oh, I can be reformed. It's too late.
Brady
You go over to this place, you order anchovy pizza. That's the code.
Johnny
Yeah, I don't know what the. That used to be the old school. Now they just go on Reddit and go, she's asleep, interested. And people are like, yup. And nobody says, hey, this guy's selling his wife.
Brady
Like, no, the thing facetimes the dude. Yeah, see here?
Johnny
She told you. She's out like a light, and he starts pushing her around. She ain't waking up for nothing. But no one on. Give me five minutes. No one on Reddit turned it in.
Brady
It's an open discussion. Yes.
Johnny
And also, oh, yeah, you can get. I know you got to search for it, so I guess it's hard to find, but people were. And the dude was accommodating. And then were they paying, or was.
Brett Vesely
This just for his.
Johnny
It could be for some cookery, maybe a couple bucks, maybe some wings.
Brady
They didn't talk about money exchanging, but.
Johnny
What if ZIPS is involved?
Brady
It goes all the way back.
Johnny
All the way back to that.
Brett Vesely
Ooh, there's enough wives of Postinos are willing to cheat. You don't need to pass down broad.
Johnny
Bros. How much fun is that? Again, I go back to that. You want a woman?
Brady
Fish in a barrel.
Johnny
You want a woman to text you and talk to you and reach out to you every once in a while, you know there's a dead woman laying on a ground. Like, she'll do terrible.
Brett Vesely
William says the same thing. She's obviously got issues. If she didn't know her husband's been drugging her for a year.
Johnny
Well, yeah, maybe, I suppose. I'm not gonna Blame her. She didn't know she was getting there. She's waking up. I just knocked out. Like, when you wake up from not expecting to go to sleep, you should have a couple of questions.
Brett Vesely
You think she wanted to go to her life coach or something?
Johnny
You know, I mean, I'm just so tired.
Brett Vesely
Yeah.
Brady
And I wake up so sore.
Johnny
Like, I worked out and you wash the sheets every time I. That's so sweet.
Brady
She.
Johnny
Yeah. I'm not gonna blame her for anything, but I wake up from unexpected naps a couple of times. I didn't know I was going to sleep. I woke up really weird. I'm thinking something, something ring, camera didn't kiss. Like, there's so much going on. Said you guys always talk crap about Maryvale on the west side. Take the west side over Bill Cosby's east side eight days a week. Yeah, I'm with you on that one.
Brady
That's.
Johnny
I'm just surprised I don't turn that.
Brady
Stuff in on the west side.
Johnny
The. Just there you got that snitch thing you always do. Nobody tells it's going on, but you guys won't tell on each other. Yeah, that. But, man, fact of the matter. So many things slipped through the cracks on this. That dude's balls were huge. To even consider trying. And then going on the computer and then taking videos. Like, everything he did was designed to be awful. And he found a couple other people. He says Backpage.com got destroyed, but Reddit lives. Backpage was infinitely more useful for legal stuff than Reddit has ever been. I don't know. Every time I go to Reddit, it's about somebody struggling with their relationship or I don't even know what Reddit's for.
Brett Vesely
It's like listening to a Shinedown song.
Johnny
Yeah. Everybody's sad on Reddit every time I'm there. Maybe it's just what I search. Like, I search out, what, a list.
Brady
And like, what did you like when you were.
Johnny
Yeah, well, they did in the 90s. Yeah. I think it's all just dependent on you, what you end up with. But. There's. It's just weird. The whole world's gone crazy, and the only one you could be close to is Nathan Sutherland, the Christian rapper that got nabbed years ago for this. But at least. Good Lord, at least Nathan Sutherland was monogamous. He wasn't selling her. For crying out loud, Nathan. All to himself, Nathan tried to keep it under wraps, but made the terrible error of impregnating the comatose patient. It is nuts, man. That's going to be a TV show. Our grandparents are just spinning their graves. But someday that's going to catch a necrophiliac is going to be a television show. Someday, like some dude on Reddit will put. They'll put out fake ads that hey, I'm working at the morgue. Anybody want a warm one while right before they freeze up? And then dudes will show up with, you know, lube and like $20 and then first hand. How you doing tonight? To catch a Necro.
Brett Vesely
It's like Kill Bill all over again.
Johnny
I know.
Brady
Have you seen that document documentary?
Johnny
Documentary?
Brady
Yeah, on Chris Hansen.
Johnny
Oh, he. Well, they, they think he's a bad dude. I didn't see.
Brady
Well, yeah, it kind of. At least the guy leaves it up to you to decide. What do you think?
Johnny
Well, Chris, some of the stuff.
Brady
Because what I mean the one main thing is, is this kid's life was ruined. He was 18 and he was meeting up with a 15 year old girl. Well, and in the state next door it's legal. The parents knew. It just, it got out of hand.
Johnny
Here's the thing.
Brady
But then they showed how, you know, there's all these vigilante operations that are going on now.
Johnny
I'm forever on Chris Hansen's side. A, it was amazing entertainment and B, what you just said was illegal. 18 year olds crossing state lines to meet 15 year old.
Brady
He didn't. It was just in the state that it was at.
Johnny
He wasn't in the same state. So he crossed state lines to get to where he was in the state.
Brady
He in the state was you.
Johnny
So he crossed state lines to see her. No, he had to. Brady, if he lived in another state.
Brady
They were just saying the next state over.
Johnny
Right?
Brady
It was.
Brett Vesely
Well, that's.
Johnny
Did he live in one of those states?
Brady
He lived in a state where it wasn't.
Johnny
Right. So he crossed state lines and took his state laws to another place. That's crossing state. Yeah, he's an idiot. So his life got ruined. Yeah, he's 18, she's 15. But if they were in one place. All right, well, he still did something not so great. You got to be careful. Look, 15 year olds, you don't know when you're 18, offering you online. It's right there.
Brady
Stop. That's it.
Johnny
Stop. If you ever cross anything that says welcome to and it's another state in the union and you're on your way to meet someone who's 15, you're doing something dumb. It's so easy to avoid all of this and I know there's nuance and things, but that one, right? Chris Hansen's fault. The dude showed up to a sting. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, Catch a Necrophiliac is going to be a show. And then they got mad at Chris Hansen because he got a little high and mighty on himself there when that show was going gangbusters. And then he started to bone around on his wife and stuff. And they caught him in a. In kind of a really bad spot.
Brady
They didn't really go on that. But the thing that was the demise of the show is that one person basically off themselves because it was.
Johnny
Because technically nobody was. No, there was no dupe. You want to talk about fascism? That NBC show was basically showing people doing guilty stuff and going up. There you go. You're free to go. And they were guilty of. Because they technically didn't do anything. They were talking to somebody over 18, but they thought they were under. And then once you go to court and they're like, yeah, but she was old enough, so nothing.
Brady
Bad fantasy.
Nicole
Yeah.
Johnny
It'S crazy. This guy is throwing out a name is who he thinks the Gilbert guy is. And I'm not gonna say it because.
Brady
They put the guy's name out.
Johnny
No, they didn't. The local football team will sue me if I say this name. It's not that funny idea, though. Way to shame him. No, they said story. They said they're holding it off.
Brady
There's no picture of the guy. Maybe it was a picture of one of the guys that went over there.
Johnny
No, they. Well, maybe I don't know. The guy who was at Zips yesterday that I was supposed to meet said I ordered my pizza and a zipper reader to go. You can't get a zipper reader to go. Brian Said didn't get anything and I already paid. The Homeland Security told all of us not to pay. And don't ask for to go boxes. Just get the F out. So you lost your money. Can't get a zipper reader to go in Vegas. Yeah, it's. It's a mixed up but yeah, boy, Valvar Holmberg was still alive. That old man would be super duper confused as to what is on. What the hell. Yeah, you go on the Internet and you ask people to come over and bang your sleeping wife. I don't even want to bang my wife. Why would I want to watch it? It's weird. We know too much. We know way too much. I don't even think that would have been news. I think that would have just been something that was like, that's just awful. We're not doing that. Like, that would have been. The newspapers would have just skipped that. Back when my grandpa. Nobody needs to know about this. We caught him. We're good. That's all you really need to do. And here's the thing I think we can all agree on. Bring us all back home.
Brett Vesely
We're gonna find something.
Johnny
Thank God. Common ground. Brett. That's what. That's what Johnny's here to do.
Brett Vesely
I'm hoping help you out.
Johnny
Johnny's here to soothe salve wounds, make everybody all agree on something. If we could all agree on things, we'd all be like, you know what? Let's relax and exhale. We can all agree that there's absolutely no reason to have the Pro bowl anymore because Shedeur Sanders is now one of the quarterbacks. If the players don't want it, why are we still having anything to do with it? So Shador Sanders was just named to the Pro bowl because no one else would do it. Drake May can't go. Josh Allen is hurt. Joe Burrow. What's the dude. Trevor Lawrence, all of them unavailable. C.J. stroud, Aaron Rodgers. Go down the list of guys who had better years than Shador Sanders, all of them. And Shador's like, I'll do it. And they said, all right, grab a hat. And they sent him to the Pro Bowl. He's a Pro Bowler.
Brett Vesely
Where is the Pro bowl this year?
Johnny
I don't even know. Back in Hawaii. Seven touchdowns, 10 interceptions, 1400 yards. And he's like, well, this is one of the good ones. Justin Herbert. Like, I can rattle off everybody except Geno Smith.
Brady
And so he's one of the quarterbacks. Who's the other one?
Johnny
Well, they still. The three that were named. Oh, yeah, yeah. They just signed him off a practice squad. He's available. The three that got picked were May, Allen and Herbert. Those were the. And then all of them are like, we're not going to that.
Brett Vesely
Well, it's in San Francisco. It's not much of a vacation.
Johnny
Oh, wow. So Shador is going to head up there because why wouldn't you? So Shador Sanders is a Pro Bowl Cash. That is terrible. There's only, like, three quarterbacks worse than him in the afc, and they're terrible. Even Jake Browning played pretty well for the Bengals. At least, you know, he couldn't. As good as Chanel a couple of games in.
Brady
Flaka.
Nicole
Oh, yeah.
Johnny
Oh, yeah. Philip Rivers, he came in and went, put him back in there. That's fun. Put that old weirdo in there.
Holmberg
There's something. Something. Check out homework's morning sickness podcast at 98kupd.comberg's Morning Sickness.
Johnny
That's how bad that great meme that came out yesterday. How bad is the bill's job that Philip Rivers pulled out of consideration? He hasn't pulled out of anything. That guy's got, like, 40 kids. And also, the NFL's in a little conspiracy mode again, because back in. Before the season started in September, they put out a graphic of Santa Clara Stadium, The super bowl logo, big Lombardi Trophy, and they had one player from each team walking towards the stadium. Right. So. And Saquon Barkley was, like, kind of the guy centered in the back of the crowd of players. And there's TJ Watt and, you know, all these guys walking towards the stadium. Who's right up front? Sam Darnold and Drake 5-1-2 going in. And they're like, come on. Yeah, yeah. They're like, oh, it's been rigged from the jump. Of course, everything's a conspiracy now. You can't just have a coincidence anymore. But my God. Yeah, it's a. It's. I mean, if you look at the picture, it's pretty great. It's. And it's. You know, they're like. Never mind that. The colors are pretty consistent, but here's the, like, the deep shot of it, you know, and it's just the whole thing. And then you get up close and who are the first two dudes going in? Drake, May, and Sam Darnold walking right into the stadium. Maybe they know they did that after the fact. No, it was on September 8th. Yeah. Little things like that. But there's no coincidences anywhere. Everybody wants everything to be a conspiracy.
Brady
And Trump's not going too.
Johnny
It's too many.
Brady
Too far of a travel.
Johnny
Yeah. It's too many miles.
Brett Vesely
Air force one, Vince McMahon do that artwork.
Johnny
It's starting to feel that way. But again, we're all in on everything again, just because they had to have somebody up there. And who would have thought, I'll draw Patrick Mahomes, like, if. Because if it was me and it's not fixed, I'd be like, it's gonna be. I'll put Darnold and May up close. Close enough to them as Malik, neighbors from the Giants. So, I mean. But he's second. Those are the first two. And then if I was drawing that, I'd be like, I'll put a couple guys. No way they'll make it. Turns out, guy hit It. It is the first super bowl where both teams started the year at 50 to 1 odds of getting to the Super Bowl. They've never had teams with worse odds than that.
Brett Vesely
Toledo put his bet in early.
Johnny
No kidding. He should have gotten on that early. Nobody saw this coming. But also, I'd like to have the odds that Shador Sanders was in the Pro Bowl. That would have been a trillion to one. But he didn't get voted in. So I'm sure that the betting apps would have been like, no, no, no, no, no. You can't just show up. But that's what's going to happen. This is our first weekend without football in 23 weeks.
Brady
Said that to Kirby yesterday. Like a Monday night. Yeah, it's first Monday night.
Johnny
You got to taste that.
Brady
You had Indiana last week.
Johnny
Yeah, you got to taste that a little bit and kind of recognize that this is our next few months.
Brett Vesely
Now you got to talk to your wives.
Johnny
Oh, no, you don't. And then also go get a. That's horrifying.
Brett Vesely
Or go get a zipper eater.
Johnny
There's that. Yeah. It's all caving in around us.
Brady
Where do I go?
Johnny
Some. Some guys can't talk to their wives because they're out cold and busy. Yeah. The world's getting crazy. And then yesterday we did a thing. Brett, get your. Get your fingers ready to start typing this in. Remember how we did the. The genres of music where you're more than likely to be a philanderer and jazz came up number one, which was kind of surprising to all of us. Then I saw a thing that said, these are the top nine songs, and I don't know why they only didn't. Although this one jumps up to 21. So they had the top nine listed. 21 seductive tracks to. To have sex with, not sex with the track. You know what I'm saying? And some of these are like. And you know who's not on there again? Same bands we were talking about. The Angels of Death. And. Yeah, yeah, they're not on there. Surprisingly not there. But Sex with Me by Rihanna, which is a solid one if you grab that. That's. That's number 12. But all the way back, like number 21. And it kind of stinks to have to be the 21st one. It's called Folded by Kehlani.
Brett Vesely
This one's on there, though, right?
Johnny
Who's it? That's the Rihanna one. Oh, no, it's not. It's not. Lou's not on there. No, they have old. They've always ready all Right.
Brett Vesely
What do you want me to pull up here?
Johnny
Try the number 21. Which is folded by Kehlani. K E H L A N I and I've not heard it, but these are tracks to set the mood. And we did that yesterday and it was all jazz stuff. There's Kehlani trying to have sex with her. Baby. Get to it, Kehlani.
Holmberg
Jesus.
Johnny
Oh, it's about. It's trying to get her ex back. That's fine. I could. I could have that in the background. Some candles. And then another one was Skin by Dijon. D I J O N. I don't know any of these. I want to, though. Yep. Still no.
Brett Vesely
That's all Daisy.
Johnny
Thanks. You think this is gay?
Brett Vesely
You don't?
Brady
Oh, man.
Johnny
Got a good rhythm.
Brett Vesely
Blow my mind with this one.
Johnny
A white guy can keep the beat to this. Pot parties Blow my mind Friday night. All right. That's not terrible. I don't think you know who's on There is the song Closer. Not that one by Kings of Leon, which surprised me. And that was in the top 10. Where was that? The sixth stripping with sexual tension. Caleb Followell's rugged vocals yearn for a lover over a dark throbbing bass. Gritty, sultry tone captures the obsessive pull of desire. Porta Subs.
Brett Vesely
No, Porta's head.
Johnny
Oh, Brady probably heard Porta.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
This is. This is biting people in the lips and stuff. Music. This is not rough, but it's a little bit pushy.
Brett Vesely
Cinemax soundtrack.
Johnny
Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I like it though.
Brett Vesely
There's a lampshade in the way. You don't ever see the money.
Brady
It's just.
Brett Vesely
Yeah, it's boring.
Johnny
Brett knows it. You could have directed a cinema. The two of us could have directed an amazing Cinemax movie. Yeah.
Brett Vesely
Why is there a plant on the.
Johnny
Coffee table right there? Right as she spreads her legs, the camera swings across and there's like a jewelry box on the counter.
Brett Vesely
Worse.
Johnny
I get the metaphor. The box. Block the box. But come on. It's a good one. I like this. And a number. Wicked Games by the Weekend. Not Chris Isaac.
Brady
But it's the Chris Isaac cover.
Johnny
I don't know. No. Says it's from I love the Weeknd. I think he's great. But he did Wicked Games and Wicked Game is the Chris Isaac. So if you got the weekend. Dark and moody, irresistibly alluring strike from the house of balloons. Tormented yet undeniably sexy is lost on a drug fueled self destructive path given into desires that are all consuming and toxic.
Nicole
I left My girl back home I.
Johnny
Don'T love her no more he has driving.
Brady
Dirty man.
Johnny
He cusses able. And then the number one one was Rocket by Beyonce, I think. And I heard that one. I'm not a Beyonce guy. She's got a song called Rocket. She said this is the number one song according to this.
Brett Vesely
This should be the clean version.
Johnny
To have sex to let me sit this bag. Oh, yeah. Everything's just for white guys to keep a rhythm.
Nicole
Yeah.
Johnny
It's like, it's slow enough that you can kind of do the rock. Take this off. You watch me.
Brady
Okay, I'm finished.
Johnny
Would Brady make it through the song?
Brett Vesely
This is six and a half minutes, man.
Johnny
To me, this is going. These are the types of songs where it's all pre planned. Like she's got to go get dressed up. You got candles.
Brett Vesely
You have the Spotify playlist, art set.
Brady
Oh, yeah.
Johnny
And it just kind of rolls and she comes out and slowly takes her clothes off. And then you kiss for a minute. Stop all that. Drink champagne. It's like an awful lot going on. You can't just grab hold of her and start hammering away, like from Minimum Wage by they Might Be Giants and just get it out of the way.
Nicole
We're almost done.
Brett Vesely
I still like more of the old school stuff.
Johnny
Oh, me too. This isn't a Roadhead song.
Brett Vesely
This is what popped up. How about this?
Johnny
Oh, Isley Brothers, man. This is on there too. Oh, is it?
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
Eisley Brothers were on, too. This one is where you go. Oh, yeah, yeah. This is the SOS between the sheets.
Brett Vesely
Yeah.
Johnny
Yeah. This is number seven. This is sweet. And again, this is 12:30 right there. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. This is him. Then big Popeye Pops in your head. That's true. Picture that big fat, lisping weirdo. Ladies, if you hear a dude playing this, it's a move.
Brett Vesely
Don't fall asleep.
Johnny
I got it on Reddit. We're all right. Yeah. All of these, though, are like. They're the ones that, like, play Minimum Wage by they Might Be Giants because that's mine. It's fantastic. It's a great sex song. Gets right to the point. And you got it. Yeah, It's a great one. And this is.
Nicole
This is minimum wage. Yeah.
Johnny
And it's over.
Brady
Good night.
Johnny
Good night, honey. 18 second song and I can get behind. Play it again. Oh, man, that gets me excited. Oh, we still got 15 seconds left. It has a long fade. That's for cleanup.
Nicole
Minimum wage. Yeah.
Johnny
I like the whip. She should be finished now. You should be asleep now. That's one of that. Should be on the list. That's an announcement.
Brett Vesely
Tom wants to know what about Celebrate Me Home for Brady?
Johnny
That's for Brady's solo act. He likes sending songs to ladies. Reminded him he'll be there in a minute. By the way, you can get a zipper reader to go. I didn't know that. Being told that on a regular basis. You can get one.
Brady
Maybe that's what they got busted for. It's illegal.
Johnny
This guy says there's no sleep token on their sleep token. Gets the lady soaked. I don't know about that. Do they? I don't know. Mazzy Star. That's. That's. Fade into youo is one of the. That was the go to in the 90s. My God.
Brady
You mentioned what we were talking about yesterday. That Janet Jackson song.
Johnny
Oh, that whole album. If. If this thing.
Brett Vesely
Oh, yeah, forget it.
Johnny
You're boning your chicks went bananas with it. Her voice. Unbelievable. There was a girl when I worked at the Zone who was showing me stuff, how to work things. When I first got there, we played this. Oh, yeah, that bone Mama started to, like, get squirty. I just want to show you how this works.
Brett Vesely
Boone.
Brady
Boone.
Johnny
What? Why does it get so humid in here? Does it smell like butterscotch? And we're like chulas and clove cigarettes. Clove cigarettes. And what is this?
Nicole
Boon.
Johnny
Boon's gonna rub the boon. Boon. No. She was showing me this, and we played this song, and she just sat in her chair. It was the weirdest thing I've ever seen. She just. The song came, and she just leaned back in the. With the air chair, and she just kind of closed her eyes and let the song happen. And I was just in the room, like, I guess I'll wait this out. Like, no noise, no talking. She got all enveloped in it. This one had some. This got some life on it. Fade into you is a good one.
Holmberg
There's something. Something. Check out Homburg's morning sickness podcast@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness.
Johnny
I watched a girl try to do that in karaoke.
Brett Vesely
This was another one that somebody was suggesting when I brought up the Portishead.
Johnny
I don't know this one. Yeah, it's a. Oh, yes, I do. Oh, I do. Glory box. Forgot about this one. This one's got a lot of percussion, and it's gonna throw me off in a steady beat. Yeah. Or to say this is a. And then.
Nicole
Yeah, too long.
Johnny
Forgot all about this one. We're putting together a list. Yeah, that's a solid one.
Holmberg
All right.
Johnny
Put that on this. And then everybody always says the enigma thing. But that one was more. I don't know. That one seemed middle aged to me when it was happening.
Brett Vesely
Plus you got the monks, also the beat.
Johnny
You don't want to find out that your partner was Catholic and something terrible happened to him and then start playing this.
Brett Vesely
My Father Dale's house.
Johnny
Yeah. Cranked all the. Father Dale was. This was on a loop in his head. Just can't stop being horny. So many kids. It's their fault. They shouldn't parade these high school kids around me all the time. I need to put the Lord in them.
Brett Vesely
Literally.
Johnny
Yeah, I'm gonna do it tonight for.
Brady
Snickers and a Coke.
Johnny
And then I'd walk by and it's like. But not that one. That one is weird looking like, hi, Father Dale. Keep walking, watermelon toothpick boy. I'm interested in the Lord. He's not interested in you. I could have gone in there and like, I'm on fire for Jesus. There's like a hundred thousand other religions you should choose. Aren't you a Jew? Like, wait a minute. Yeah, that's a good one too. Yeah. Bone in. Music is always a list people have. You're right. But these are all the ones where you gotta prepare any one of them spontaneous bam. Like closer by Nine Inch Nails is one that people just boing. Girls like that one because it's just so graphic. Anyway, fun little list. And that's something we can all get along with too. We don't need ice raids and homeland security to constantly occupy our minds. We can start thinking about things we all like. Football hating Shador Sanders and sex. Like that's what we bond on. We all bond on that. You know who could bring us all together in peace and harmony? It ain't religion, it's porn. Sure, you'd have some outliers. There's always that. That's an unintelligent person always telling you that there's a few outsiders. But for the most part, the average, if you're a critical thinker, would say that most people enjoy sex. And porn is a massive industry and nobody is going to fight you over which porn you like. We can agree to disagree that if Brett likes fat Italian hairy girls and I like fit, gorgeous senoritas, you're not going to be mad at me for that. But if I say I like Republican gals. Fascism.
Brett Vesely
Here's the 90s, baby. Making music and slow Jam. No, this is just some. I found it. Little Usher for you.
Johnny
Oh, boy. I was at the Usher show.
Brett Vesely
Yeah.
Johnny
I was the only white guy in there. And I can. I could dance over. Ladies were.
Brady
There's the dude's key. Sweat from yesterday.
Johnny
He's like.
Brady
That was his go to.
Brett Vesely
Oh, this one here.
Johnny
Those ladies were so impressed with me dancing at that Usher show. Because I was just copying what the dude did in front of me. I was about a half beat behind. You can move for a white boy. Like, I guess. I don't know. I'm just doing what he's doing.
Brett Vesely
Take you home.
Brady
All this.
Johnny
Yo, she was. She had to fit in her purse. She was a biggin. Everything's all preparation.
Brady
Like, he.
Brett Vesely
Oh, here's your song. That's the one you were talking about.
Johnny
Oh, the video, too. Janet Jackson.
Brett Vesely
Were you singing us back to her at that concert?
Johnny
Anytime. This is the one. I screamed her name. Well, no. If was when I actually screamed at her. I was front row. I shouted at her. I couldn't control it. I was like a teenager watching the Beatles back in the Ed Sullivan Show. I lost my mind. And she has a dude come up on stage from the crowd and sits him in a chair and ties him to it and then sings this. And that's the way love goes.
Brady
The New Edition.
Johnny
And I was volunteering. I thought my head was gonna explode. I was screaming, pick me, pick me. But I think it was predetermined. That's what I like. I felt like Father Dale again. Walked right by me. New Edition. When they were with Johnny Gill. Johnny Gill ruined New Edition.
Brady
I know.
Johnny
All their songs were good in there.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
Rub you the right way.
Brady
All right.
Johnny
We were getting to it. Calm down. All the rest of them were kind of, like, smooth. And then Johnny Gill came in and just started to rape.
Brett Vesely
It's like the Teddy Bender.
Johnny
What's he yelling about?
Brett Vesely
You got.
Johnny
You got what I need. He was. The other guys were like, everything's wet and good. You know who he is? He's Leroy Jenkins of sex. He just drove into the dry ass. So we were all going, well, damn it, my ass is dry. It didn't even spit on it. Sorry. I digress.
Brady
Forgot about. Funny how Janet again.
Johnny
I know. Oh, no. Janet has some.
Brett Vesely
I remember this one.
Johnny
Janet was H. Town knocking boots.
Brady
Yeah.
Johnny
This is a Kiss 1230 song right here.
Holmberg
Kiss 1230. The rhythm of the city. I know it's early in the morning, but this one is for all the ladies.
Johnny
Like H. Town tells you, kicking it with my boy. Ladies, why don't you put down that coffee, turn around, because your breath smells terrible. And give your man what he's good for before he goes off to work this morning. Go wash your booty. Like you know what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying, my friend. Kiss 12:30. Rhythm of the city.
Holmberg
Let's knock boots.
Johnny
I can do it. I can still do I. You know what? We need to just start Kiss 12:30 over again.
Brett Vesely
We do.
Johnny
Get back in there and I'll do all that and be fun. They have a little soundtracks for sex that people make. And that was a good one. 21 list. 21 was pretty solid, though. We can put it up there or something. You guys already have your list. But I always find that fascinating. What one person says, but nobody ever argues. It never gets political. CNN and Fox both agree that knocking boots probably pretty good for lovemaking.
Brady
Put it on the list.
Johnny
Let's start there. Let's go back to the foundation of man and say that, you know, that's what we all agree on. And let's start working there instead of pepper balling each other every time they close the zips because the. You don't know what's going on, but you're mad about everything.
Brett Vesely
Oh, here's the white guy list.
Johnny
What? Mario Speed wagons.
Brett Vesely
The old school love making music.
Johnny
Jesus, you're gonna break her hips. You got a woman who wants this underneath there? She's gonna shatter like mummy dust.
Brady
Mario's on. How many times?
Brett Vesely
Twice.
Johnny
So far it says old school lovemaking music. And right there, I'm out. The words old school and lovemaking shouldn't be with each other.
Brett Vesely
And Kevin Cronin should not be listed anywhere near that.
Johnny
Girls love me. She's drier than a box of saltines. If this gets her even a little.
Nicole
I tell myself that I can't hold on forever.
Johnny
All right, I can't listen to that because I know the words. And now it makes me freak out because the reason I know the words, my mom used to listen to that stuff all the time.
Brett Vesely
There's the other one.
Johnny
Little did I know. All right, this one I like. I'll break some hips for this.
Nicole
You should have seen by the look in my eyes, baby.
Johnny
Here's the problem, though. It reminds me of my kitchen in Albuquerque. My mom listening to kob, trying to win a cruise.
Brady
Oster Hyman in the morning.
Nicole
But you didn't listen.
Johnny
This is my mom's baby making music. I can't have this.
Brett Vesely
Can't See Dan walking in the bedroom singing this tomorrow.
Johnny
My dad probably. Oh, gross. My dad probably. We did that.
Nicole
Yeah.
Johnny
My dad probably won that.
Nicole
Those, man.
Johnny
Marcy, bend over with Cronin's hair.
Brady
That long throw.
Johnny
Oh, I wonder if my parents did that, like, when we weren't home. And then this song would come on. They'd look at each other and wink in front of us at dinner and stuff. My dad's just in a groove, just.
Nicole
Slamming it, whispering in her ear that I loved you. I meant that. I love it forever.
Johnny
Here we go, Marcy, Do it again. I need another song. Give me a break. What time do the kids come home? I don't know. I love this one. This is one. I like this one. Look it.
Brett Vesely
You want this one?
Nicole
Yeah.
Johnny
Oh, boy. Yeah. This is parents music, bro. She made me think of my mom and dad. I bet you my dad did this one. Yep. My dad was rolling Marcia to this. God damn it. And he's probably still doing it, like, to that new wife. Oh, no.
Brady
Bill Withers.
Johnny
Oh, use Me. Phenomenal. Oh, yeah, yeah. This one.
Brett Vesely
Bill Withers is pretty phenomenal. Regardless.
Johnny
Yeah, this is a good one. All right, that's enough. Enough of making Dan and Marcy in my mind with those beautiful, beautiful songs.
Brett Vesely
About some Donna Summer.
Johnny
Ah, man, This is solid.
Brett Vesely
This is the 16 minute version.
Johnny
This is man design. Jesus, what do I need? I need it. I know. I need a table of Gatorade next to the 16 minutes. Got my electrolytes, my goddamn avatar.
Brady
I just saw her. She's coming to one of the casinos.
Johnny
In the next couple of weeks.
Brady
Yeah, she's dead. Oh, no, it's dead.
Johnny
I don't think she is, man. Again, I'd be impressed. Shady McCoy moment there. One of them's gonna be there.
Brady
What's the difference?
Johnny
What do you got on the big board of musical Treats there, Burt? See, we can all look at happiness like. We can all unite over this. And people, Republicans, Democrats, everybody in their cars, all crazy about ice and pepper balls and everything else, have this conversation. This is a good one. Debate whether or not REO Speedwagon is a good one for love making for your parents.
Brady
Think of that.
Johnny
No, don't do that. Stop doing that pepper roll. I'd rather get pepper ball. I would do a suicide pepper bowl right between my own eyes. Get out of the room. What's with the wig? All right.
Brett Vesely
On the list, Pantera, Ozzy, It's a Raid for Zips, Cold Chamber, Loco, Stone Sour, Three Days Grace, Riot for everything going on ACDC Money talks for Zips. Hell yeah. I don't care anymore for everything going on the Void from Parkway Drive. Great song.
Johnny
Let's do It's a Raid.
Brett Vesely
It's a Raid.
Johnny
It's a Raid for zips. Is that a good one? No, Ozzy's.
Brett Vesely
That's Post Malone.
Johnny
Oh, is it?
Brett Vesely
Yeah.
Johnny
I haven't heard it. All right. Did you like it? Ozzy and Post Malone? I don't know that I know this one.
Brett Vesely
And Mike Patton turns 58 today.
Johnny
Oh, no kidding. Oh, boy. Which one we're gonna do with him?
Brady
Mr. Be aggressive.
Johnny
No, no, Mr. Bumble. No. Be Aggressive's good. End of the World is a good sex song. That's a great stripper dirty sex song. That. That should be on people's list too. This one. All right, we'll start that one. End of the World by Faith no.
Brett Vesely
More is Edge of the World.
Johnny
Edge of the World. I'm sorry. Yeah. This one. You know this one?
Brady
I think so.
Brett Vesely
Here it is.
Johnny
We'll go with this one. Maybe a little Edge of the World out there. This one has some. We're on the vibe. We might as well keep it up.
Holmberg
Kiss 12:30. Here's a bunch of white crackers and one of them's a homosexual. Let's Fit no More.
Johnny
The Rhythm of the City. Unless you're one of them filthy gays. Oh, that's disgusting.
Holmberg
On the download.
Brady
Is that weird? It's pretty cool actually.
Johnny
No membership fees. I've heard enough of this.
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Podcast: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness (98 KUPD)
Date: January 27, 2026
Hosts: John Holmberg (Johnny), Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, Dick Toledo
Episode Theme:
This episode covers a wild ride across Arizona’s latest law enforcement drama—the Homeland Security raid of Zipps, an outrageous Gilbert crime involving a husband drugging and trafficking his wife on Reddit, an epic (and comedic) rant about the pointlessness of the NFL Pro Bowl, and a deep-dive list into the best songs to get in the mood—all with the signature irreverence and snappy banter that defines the show.
Timestamps: 02:19 – 07:49
“This was a coordinated 15-location raid... HSI, on the other hand, is the same rank as the FBI... If they’re involved, it’s about who’s getting paid. I’d bet on charges like money laundering, document fraud...” (Johnny, 06:00)
“I sure hope people don’t just want their Instagram feeds full of activism and get pepper-balled over something that’s just money laundering.” (Johnny, 07:03)
Timestamps: 08:41 – 18:14
“Her ass always hurt. And she’s like, oh... she turned the computer on to do some Pinterest and…wait, ticket, that’s my ass.” (Johnny, 09:14)
“I honestly think the dude driving over is even worse than the guy offering it up.” (Johnny, 14:33)
“If you have that talk with your wife and she runs, at least give her a chance to escape.” (Johnny, 15:22)
Timestamps: 21:20 – 24:07
“If you ever cross into another state to meet a 15-year-old, you’re doing something dumb. It’s so easy to avoid all of this.” (Johnny, 22:57)
Timestamps: 26:03 – 30:36
“There’s absolutely no reason to have the Pro Bowl anymore, because Shedeur Sanders is now one of the quarterbacks. If the players don’t want it, why are we still having anything to do with it?” (Johnny, 26:04)
Timestamps: 31:26 – 53:05
“Try the number 21, which is Folded by Kehlani... And we did that yesterday and it was all jazz stuff.” (Johnny, 32:44)
“I love the Weeknd... but he did Wicked Games and Wicked Game is the Chris Isaac.” (Johnny, 35:53)
“This is 12:30 right there. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. Then big Popeye pops in your head... Ladies, if you hear a dude playing this, it’s a move.” (Johnny, 38:05)
“Jesus, you’re gonna break her hips... You got a woman who wants this underneath there, she’s gonna shatter like mummy dust.” (Johnny, 49:09)
“You know who could bring us all together in peace and harmony? It ain’t religion, it’s porn.” (Johnny, 43:36)
“Stay aware, don’t care. That’s my message. If I can give you any sage advice as a guy getting up there…” (Johnny, 04:10)
“Wait for the dust to settle before you get pepper-balled over what turns out to be some owner laundering money. Has nothing to do with why you’re angry.” (Johnny, 07:03)
“You want a woman to text you and talk to you and reach out... You know there’s a dead woman lying on the ground. She’ll do terrible stuff.” (Johnny, 18:00)
“Bone in. Music is always a list people have. But these are all the ones where you gotta prepare — none of ’em spontaneous.” (Johnny, 42:47) “Both CNN and Fox can agree that ‘Knocking Boots’ is good lovemaking music.” (Johnny, 48:36)
If you missed the episode, you get a little of everything: juicy hometown scandal, gallows humor, thinky bits on outrage and crime, open mockery of sporting excess, and 20+ minutes of music-list fun with full-throttle Dad jokes. The moral: Stay aware, don’t care — but always keep good music handy.