01-30-26 - BR- F RI - Brady's Cultural Bigotry Comes Out In Story On Mumbai - Sci News On Brushing Teeth And Toilets - Garbage Man Picks Up Homeless Man At Kfc And Compacts Him Again At Popeyes

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness (98KUPD)

Episode: 01-30-26 – "BR- F RI - Brady's Cultural Bigotry Comes Out In Story On Mumbai - Sci News On Brushing Teeth And Toilets – Garbage Man Picks Up Homeless Man At KFC And Compacts Him Again At Popeyes"
Date: January 30, 2026
Main Cast: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, Dick Toledo, Adam Ferrara (guest)

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Overview

The episode features the usual crew's sharp, irreverent banter with guest Adam Ferrara joining in. Highlights include playful accusations of cultural bias, especially around a debate about Indian restaurants, an irreverent dive into "science news" about hygiene and human anatomy, wild Florida man stories, and the infamous tale of a homeless man compacted in a garbage truck. Throughout, the show punctuates its signature mix of crude humor, law firm antics, and boundary-pushing "radio videos" sent in by listeners.

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Key Topics and Discussions

1. Birthday Banter & Teacher Walkouts

• Host shoutouts to Phoenix Open greenskeepers and planning for upcoming birthday celebrations for Brady and K. Ray (01:11–02:43).
• On teacher protests in Tucson:
  • Jokes about joining any protest to get a day off (04:40–06:18).
  • "You could have Clan Appreciation Day. Al Qaeda Appreciation Day. You'll see whites, blacks, Mexican, everybody get a day off from work." – John Holmberg (05:28)
• Discussion of organizing their own “law firm” using ChatGPT (“Chachi Pt”) letterhead to legitimize a day off for protests (06:23–06:51).

2. Brady’s Fun Facts & Cultural Biases

• Fun facts include:
  • Cheek kissing vs. handshakes (06:51)
  • Maryland adultery laws
  • London supposedly having more Indian restaurants than any Indian city, even Mumbai or Delhi (07:14)
• Debate over the plausibility and cultural stereotypes:
  • “I know all Indian food is made with feet because of the videos we see.” – Holmberg (07:52)
  • Brady’s comments about Indian plumbing and food preparation ignite playful accusations of prejudice (08:09–09:43).
  • "That's your prejudice, which I loved, and by the way, shared. I also feel that way." – Holmberg (09:46)
• More on "canceling" India (mostly joking, inspired by their Indian friend Sanjay and encounters with Indian comedians like Vir Das) (10:08–10:43).

3. Polls, Social Commentary, and Law Firm Gags

• Discussion of a national "ice out" protest/shutdown and Olympics viewing habits
• The “law firm” bit continues, riffing on using stereotyped personas for different legal specialties (03:02, 15:11, 39:47)
• "The Whop and The Jew—it's a beautiful thing." – John Holmberg on the law firm's diversity (39:46)

4. Science News (Brady’s Segment)

• Oatmeal for cholesterol: Eating nothing but oatmeal for two days reduces cholesterol by 10%. (15:39)
• Toothbrush contamination: Deep-dive on how toilet flushing spreads bacteria to toothbrushes—only solved with airplane-style vacuum toilets or separate water closet doors (16:43–17:13).
  • “I brush while I sit on the can. Can't get in there because it's in my mouth when I flush.” – John Holmberg (17:15)
• Evolution of penis size: Study on humans having larger genitalia than other primates, with theories about women’s preference and historical dominance displays (18:12–19:16).
  • "Romans thought when you had a bigger dork, you were dumb... They thought your brains were your kidneys." – Holmberg (19:05)

5. Bizarre News Stories

• Florida Man Special: Counterfeit money at a strip club, with details about play money labeled "replica" (19:24)
• Harrowing sanitation story: Homeless man compacted twice in a garbage truck—first at a KFC, then at a Popeyes via a mistake by the driver. The tale is exaggerated for comedic effect, highlighting Brady’s narrative leaps (21:26–23:33).
  • "That is a racist story you told, Brady, without even being raced. I believe him." – Holmberg (23:53)

6. Sex & Relationships Polls

• U.S. couples’ sex frequency: A fourth say only once a month or less; another quarter at least eight times monthly.
  • Holmes: “If it’s not five or more a month, your wife is failing you.” (25:07)
• Average session: 18.6 minutes; 15 hours annually
• Discussion about honesty in these polls (whether spouses are nearby during questioning), and men’s simple needs:
  • “All a man wants is to be desired. That’s it. You’ve won the battle if you act like you like him.” – Holmberg (26:32)
  • “Show us a boob every once in a while.” – Ferrara (28:38)

7. "Radio Videos": Listener-Submitted Wild Clips

• Visual segments featuring:
  • Roller-skating accidents, particularly overweight women for comedic effect (29:08–30:14)
  • Motorcycle jumps gone wrong (30:28–31:04)
  • Matadors gored by bulls (31:12–32:01)
  • People injuring themselves doing stunts, reinforcing earlier stereotypes and gross-out humor
  • Series of increasingly crude/gross videos—including people soiling themselves, bizarre sexual stunts, and vomit fetish acts, described in graphic detail. Playful accusations of racism/cultural bias resurface in describing the participants and settings (32:27–39:07).
    • “I'm just glad she didn’t start spooning it up. That’s what I was expecting after the… Buddha one was just full of vomit.” – Holmberg (39:07)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• 01:54 – Brett Vesely: “Apparently, Rick’s really trying to get us to break the law.”
• 05:28 – John Holmberg: “You could have Clan Appreciation Day. Al Qaeda Appreciation Day. Everybody get a day off.”
• 09:46 – John Holmberg: “That’s your prejudice, which I loved, and by the way, shared. I also feel that way.”
• 17:15 – John Holmberg: “I brush while I sit on the can. Can't get in there because it's in my mouth when I flush.”
• 19:05 – John Holmberg: “Romans thought when you had a bigger dork, you were dumb.”
• 23:53 – John Holmberg: “That is a racist story you told, Brady, without even being raced. I believe him.”
• 25:07 – John Holmberg: “If it’s not five or more a month, your wife is failing you.”
• 26:32 – John Holmberg: “All a man wants is to be desired. That's it.”
• 28:38 – Adam Ferrara: "Show us a boob every once in a while."
• 39:46 – John Holmberg: “That is the Whop and the jew, and it’s a beautiful thing.”
• 31:12–32:01 – on gore videos: “How do bulls know where our buttholes are? It seems like that’s where they aim.”

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Segment Timestamps

• Birthday banter/teacher walkout jokes: 01:11–06:51
• Fun Facts & Cultural Bias Debate: 06:51–10:43
• Law firm/Protest/Escalating AI jokes: 03:02, 15:11, 39:46
• Science News (Brady): 15:39–19:16
• Florida man/garbage truck story: 19:24–23:33
• Sex & relationship polls: 24:39–28:38
• Radio Videos segment: 29:08–39:07

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Tone & Takeaways

Holmberg’s Morning Sickness leans into absurd, explicit, and sometimes offensive humor, with the cast playing up stereotypes, bouncing banter off one another, and delighting in juvenile descriptions of bodily functions and sexuality. Listeners should expect irreverence, a willingness to probe taboo topics for laughs, and a constant blurring of fact and farce—anchored by ongoing in-jokes about “prejudice,” law firm antics, and the wildest “radio videos” heard (and described) on Arizona radio.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

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[Brett Vesely]

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[Comedy Club Announcer]

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[Toledo]

Sickness.

[John Holmberg]

The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail. Want to say hi to Travis Volk out there? He's one of the dudes working at the Phoenix Open right now, groundskeeping and stuff. He's a greenskeeper. He said, it's a circus over here. He wants to hear this circus by Chevelle. And I said, okay, I need six greenskeeper passes for next Friday. That would be for Kevin Ray of the Suns, if that matters at all. And then he said, well, if you play the song, and I'm like, that's illegal. But to prove that the Jew and the Wap stand by. We will break the law to get things. That is something we will do.

[Brett Vesely]

Apparently, Rick's really trying to get us to break the law.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, Rick is sending a lot of pictures. He's gonna go to jail. A lot of photos.

[Toledo]

That's all Kray needs.

[Brett Vesely]

Rick's got great cans.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I know. I said I think he needs four. I threw six in there just for. In case he gets a couple extras. Yeah, Kevin's looking for. He's got people in town and, like, I wonder if I could do that. I'm like, I don't know. Travis, help out Kevin. It's Kevin's birthday on Sunday, same as you. Sunday, right?

[Toledo]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Yep. Brady and K. Ray have the same birthday. I think they're. I think you're just a year apart.

[Toledo]

I think so, too.

[John Holmberg]

It's either a year or a. Exactly the same age.

[Brett Vesely]

We're playing Brady Grodd today or Monday.

[John Holmberg]

Well, Adam's coming in today, so we'll probably play Monday. A little post. Brady, get your celebration and find out what you got for your birthday, and then we'll see what we can. If we can add to that Monday with Brady.

[Brett Vesely]

Kevin too. Kevin Gro.

[John Holmberg]

Kevin, come in on Monday and do Brady Kre gras.

[Toledo]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

And the two of you will. Prizes galore. If you and you can answer together. I'll talk to Kevin. We need him in here on Monday. That's a good idea, Brett. Look at this. This law firm is just churning out brilliant.

[Brett Vesely]

Changing the world.

[John Holmberg]

Changing the world. This lady says, john, I got a photo radar ticket last month. My boyfriend thought I should just pay it and get it over with. And I said, never pay those. Never pay them until you get served. And he rolled his eyes and said, of course you would do what Holmberg says now just to annoy him. Anytime anything happens, I just say, I wonder what John would do. You should make bumper stickers for cars. Nobody would ever. What would John do? That's terrible. What would Brady do? Make sense because it's moral and just. What would John do? Fight for your rights, Rachel.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, depending.

[John Holmberg]

Put this in our file cabinet and then email Rachel back for an application. We'll see which law firm she goes to. It's time now for the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our [e-mail]. you want some shade on your patio. You want to get that TV out there in that space in your backyard, but there's too much glare. They can make it all better, and they can do it beautifully. Make it look like it's part of your home with those motorized retractable ones that are sensitive to the wind, so they do it themselves. If you leave them out, you don't have to worry about them getting all destroyed by a storm that blows through like you would an umbrella or a cheaper version. All pro. Shade is the best in the business. They've been at it for over 20 years for a reason. They gonna make shade at your house. Actually give you some outdoor living space. How about that? All pro shade.com Brady report it.

[Toledo]

Good Friday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.

[John Holmberg]

We've made it.

[Toledo]

Hi. Happy National Fun at work day.

[John Holmberg]

That's Everyday gang. Oh, by the way, it's some sort of weird ice out protest.

[Toledo]

What?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Adam Ferrar]

Schools had to cancel school today because all the teachers. All the teachers said, no, we're not going.

[John Holmberg]

Of course they did. They don't want to go to work. If I'd have known about this, I wouldn't be here. I'd have. Down with whitey day. Protest. I don't care. Jews out. I'm okay. Where do I. Do I have to go to work that day? No, we're all taking day off.

[Adam Ferrar]

I believe you tried to do that.

[Toledo]

A few years ago.

[Adam Ferrar]

Down with whitey day.

[John Holmberg]

I'm fine with that.

[Adam Ferrar]

I think you did.

[John Holmberg]

If it gets us a day off, I'll do it.

[Toledo]

Every school. Look, every public school in Tucson or every school. Every school in Tucson.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding.

[Adam Ferrar]

And kids aren't the Tucson school district. Yeah, they cancel class.

[John Holmberg]

No kid is protesting anything. He's just ditching. It's legal.

[Adam Ferrar]

No, they cancel it because they don't have teachers.

[Toledo]

All the.

[John Holmberg]

I know, but I mean, they have the kids marching out too. I watched that.

[Brett Vesely]

And they're like, you didn't give them a raise?

[John Holmberg]

Red Fred, I'm not going to either. You should quit. But the kids that are marching out of the schools downtown, like there's white ones and black ones. And they're just laughing like you guys are just getting a day off. All you got to do is sit in this beautiful weather for a couple hours and act like you care. I can do that. You could have Clan Appreciation Day. Al Qaeda Appreciation Day. And you'll see whites, blacks, Mexican, everybody get a day off from work. We'll. We'll do it.

[Toledo]

Your student.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Toledo]

Keep on doing. A teacher.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you're a student. Like teachers, I think you guys should take a whole week. That'll show them. Yeah. Students, convince your teachers that a day just isn't enough. I. It's going to take weeks to get ice out of your city. Did we have a memo or anything that said we're allowed to leave?

[Adam Ferrar]

No.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna pump one out.

[Adam Ferrar]

Yeah. I think you have to make the call.

[Brett Vesely]

We have a law firm. We can do that.

[John Holmberg]

We do it. Would like to say that you guys.

[Toledo]

Get your letterhead Yet.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, we'll get that on.

[Brett Vesely]

We'll get it.

[John Holmberg]

Chachi Pt up a letterhead and we'll just put it out there and just remind her that it's illegal for your. It's totally illegal for your employer to stop you from your American right to protest by taking a day off if you have a political and just cause. Yeah, it's a law crime or something. Look it up, bro.

[Toledo]

Got a couple of basis fun facts. Kissing someone on the cheek makes you less likely to get sick than shaking their hand.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding. Yeah, cuz cheeks don't touch toilets. Well, you know, and. But yeah. What?

[Toledo]

In Maryland, adultery is a misdemeanor punishable by a ten dollar fine.

[John Holmberg]

Really, it's worth it.

[Toledo]

London has more Indian restaurants than any city in India. And even more than in Mumbai and Delhi combined.

[John Holmberg]

Wait, London has more Indian restaurants than India? Yeah, I know there's a lot of them in London, but aren't all Indian restaurants in India Indian restaurants?

[Toledo]

No, because I think they're talking about actual brick and mortar restaurants where you'd have. I don't think that includes like the marketplace where the guy's making the foot.

[John Holmberg]

I know.

[Toledo]

Whatever.

[John Holmberg]

I know all Indian food is made with feet because of the videos we see. And I'm not arguing with you. I think you're right.

[Toledo]

That's my theory.

[John Holmberg]

I gotta think in a country of a billion and a half people that they've got more restaurants than London.

[Toledo]

Well, it's tougher. I mean, you also think there's a factor of the plumbing and stuff.

[John Holmberg]

God, you really are against this. This. And again, I'm not going to argue that you're wrong. They haven't got any plumbing and they make food with their feet. That's what we know about India. I have.

[Toledo]

But that's surprising about Mumbai too because.

[John Holmberg]

Well, Mumbai is a big city and, and there's. There are people with homes and toilets.

[Brett Vesely]

They.

[John Holmberg]

They have stuff. And there's a lot of poverty, but there's also a lot of wealth.

[Brett Vesely]

Sanjay said London has more Indians in India. Made me very uncomfortable.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there are a lot there.

[Toledo]

He's Indian.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he's an Indian. I'm out of here. But I don't think that's a weird one. I don't know how big Mumbai and London's 20 million people. I don't know if Mumbai touches that or. What was the other city? Shanghai? I don't know. Delhi. New Delhi.

[Brett Vesely]

Huh.

[John Holmberg]

Interesting.

[Toledo]

FDR son Elliot Roosevelt wrote more than 20 mystery novels, many featuring his mother, Eleanor Roosevelt. As a detective. One of them. His books is titled New Deal for Death.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, his dad's New Deal.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I loved it. Your prejudice came out against India and you. You did it like. No, I think this. They don't have plumbing. They make food with their feet and bazaars don't count. That was awesome. And again, probably.

[Toledo]

I don't know about the precious, but I just know.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's prejudice. Your first image of India, the poverty.

[Toledo]

Population is a lot. There's a lot bigger, isn't it?

[John Holmberg]

But that's prejudice. But there's prejudice. Okay. The first thoughts of India is your prejudice of them stirring up, you know, stuff with her feet. Crapping in rivers. Well, that and having no flow. No, you weren't. You were very serious when you said that. Your face. I don't think those count where they're stirring it up with their feet. That's your prejudice, which I loved and by the way, shared. I also feel that way.

[Brett Vesely]

Sanjay says cancel India.

[John Holmberg]

I can't. I can't say that. I know that. But we met. He can say that, though. Veer Das, the famous comedian. And he was working. He's working in America now, and he came here and he's very wealthy. He got a home and he makes food with his hands. But we are surprised by that. We're indoctrinated to believe that they all have eight arms, ride elephants to work, and make curry with their toes. I've eaten risotto off of feet before.

[Toledo]

Excuse me.

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Toledo]

Karen Memes have flooded the market for Internet for the past, I don't know, eight or 10 years. So the male version name is now Josh.

[John Holmberg]

You're a Josh. Well, that's not fair.

[Toledo]

They're basing it on the millennials because Josh was a popular name for millennial men. From 1981 to 1996, estimated 725,000 Joshes were in the U.S. quite a lot of Josh's.

[John Holmberg]

I just got the. I didn't get this. This needed to be more organized, but nationwide shutdown January 30th. No work, no school, no shopping.

[Brett Vesely]

Let's go.

[John Holmberg]

I out everywhere. It says, strike to save America. It's got 16,000 likes. He didn't really rally America. I mean, show those bigger.

[Toledo]

A new poll asked more than 9,000Americans how amped they were in general, excited for the Olympics. 7% of the people say they tune. Will tune in every single day. Another 17 say they will watch whenever they can. 33 said they'll probably watch a few events.

[John Holmberg]

Sure. Hockey's coming man, that that hockey Canada US and then you throw Sweden in there. There's some battles, there's some good games.

[Toledo]

30 days are planning to not watch anything.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they're just poo pooing the question.

[Toledo]

12 aren't sure.

[John Holmberg]

I just don't know if I like.

[Toledo]

TV, but men are slightly more excited than women.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know if I'm excited, but I'm definitely going to check out some stuff.

[Toledo]

As for the opening ceremony next Friday, 18% say they will watch it live beginning at 2pm that's the best I.

[Adam Ferrar]

Could do because I can't put the real words in.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you can't put you in WAP.

[Adam Ferrar]

It goes against guidelines so uses 0.

[John Holmberg]

And a 3, a 3 for the E and Jew and a 0 for WAP. But I like the scales of justice. Now I need those to be tilted one way. Okay With a favorable set of breasts on the heavy side.

[Adam Ferrar]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

And then horrific cans big areola.

[Toledo]

You could make those scales jugs with.

[John Holmberg]

The way that's yeah, but one has to be good when so it has to the picture has to be two good boobs on the scale that's down and two terrible ones on the one that's up because justice favors the better breasts.

[Adam Ferrar]

Back to the drawing board.

[John Holmberg]

Get something something. Check out H's Morning Sickness podcast at.

[Adam Ferrar]

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[John Holmberg]

Holg's morning sickness. No, you got it. That's a good.

[Brett Vesely]

That's a good. You can get personalized plates in the Bronco for that.

[John Holmberg]

Chewing the W. It'll be a write off. Threes and zeros. Oh, my God. Can we predate the check to 2025 and get that right off this year?

[Toledo]

Toledo. I want our scales to be really long.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. They're just drooping way past where scale should be. They're on the ground. The scales of justice. Don't even think.

[Adam Ferrar]

One scale would be a head, the other one would be a gut.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, and it just. They're both just hanging. Those chains are wobbly. No, they're not. They're representing the grossest breasts of all time. The Areola brothers. We call you law firm.

[Toledo]

And now it's time for some science news. Hello, I'm professor Brady Bogan here with your science news. We got breakfast news. A study found that eating nothing but oatmeal for two days can lower your cholesterol by 10%. Even after you stop, there's lasting effect. For six weeks, people in the study ate oatmeal three times a day with maybe a little fruit in its tent. Nothing else.

[John Holmberg]

By the way, somebody just sent me a thing that said brady's favorite watering hole is closing down for the ice out. And it says the Dragoon tap room. Brady's a fan of the tap dragon. I'm going to the tap dragon. Dragoon tap room is closed today. Joining the nationwide shutdown in solidarity with Tucson. I didn't know this was a thing or we wouldn't be here and I'd be on the news saying, yep, we took the day off. Do you know why they shot Martin Luther King?

[Brett Vesely]

Because we can.

[John Holmberg]

Because I don't know.

[Toledo]

They did a deep dive on whether flushing really really Transfers bacteria from your toilet to your toothbrush. The answer is yep. The only way to solve it would be installing a vacuum toilet. Like airplanes have.

[Adam Ferrar]

Don't brush your teeth in the.

[Toledo]

But if you have the wall. If your water closet with a door.

[Brett Vesely]

Closed, that helps a lot.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. If you've got a toilet next to the sink and you flush all the molecules and kicks it up ours and the water cloth, you got your owners, too.

[Toledo]

Yeah, pretty good. There's enough distance there.

[Adam Ferrar]

Everybody had.

[John Holmberg]

I brush while I sit on the can. Can't get in there because it's in my mouth when I flush. Fair point.

[Adam Ferrar]

And are you. Are you multitasking? Oh, yeah.

[Toledo]

Are you?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Adam Ferrar]

Really?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Blumpkin.

[Toledo]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Whole thing going on.

[Toledo]

All right.

[Brett Vesely]

That's impressive.

[John Holmberg]

You can. You can't brush and pee. It's the same time.

[Toledo]

I don't know that I've ever tried.

[John Holmberg]

It's easy. Do that, lean back, open your legs, spit it right down there. Yeah.

[Adam Ferrar]

Does the sonic, you know, action help?

[Brett Vesely]

Got be careful you don't miss.

[John Holmberg]

What do I got, Parkinson's? I'm just brushing my teeth.

[Brett Vesely]

Be careful you don't miss. You're going to get crest crank.

[John Holmberg]

Actually, you know what? I've often done that. I've hit it a few times. Really? Yeah. You just think you're minty fresh now.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

He said. Well, that's nice. If this thing gets, you know, fluoride.

[Toledo]

Gets on that junk, it'll make it dumber.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, good. He's been thinking too much.

[Toledo]

Speaking of junk, we got junk science. Men in general have much bigger junk than males of other species. A new study looked at why we evolved that way, and there might be two reasons. Women like big junk and men fear it. The study found size does matter to women up to a certain point, and then men see it as a sign of dominance, which mattered more before clothes was a thing. So tiny junk may have mostly been bred out of semblance during natural selection.

[John Holmberg]

Well, there was that one study a long time ago. Why are all the Roman statues little penises? And that was the favorable thing back then, evidently, that they said that the smaller penises used to have bigger ones. Made you remember. They thought.

[Toledo]

Is that why it was more welcome?

[John Holmberg]

They thought you were dumb?

[Toledo]

It was a welcoming sign, like a pineapple.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, pee pee was on your house. But they remember. They did. That was it. The Romans thought when you had a bigger dork, you were dumb because they didn't know anything. They thought your brains were your kidneys. They had no Idea what was what.

[Toledo]

So they just your science news.

[John Holmberg]

Your. Your big thing down there was creating stupid thoughts. And they're not wrong.

[Toledo]

We got a Florida man named Alexander Baker Depew. He was feeling romantic, so he decided to buy a bouquet of flowers and some chocolates for a dancer at a strip club. The flowers and chocolates ran them about $288. He paid for them with counterfeit funny money. The bills had the word replica on them and said they were not legal tender or only be used for motion pictures. That motion picture money.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it looks pretty good. But it does say replica.

[Toledo]

Then he went to the strip club, tried to pay the bar tab and some with some of the more with the movie money. Both the bartender and the florist realized the money was fake. They called the cops. Police showed up at the club, arrested Alexander. They searched him and then they found 400 more in counterfeit bills. Some cocaine and meth. Now he's facing felonies for the fake money.

[John Holmberg]

It's like a fair. It's had a great day with some fake money. He's going to pay for it. But.

[Toledo]

What do you think Alex? Looks like Alexander Baker Depew.

[Brett Vesely]

Like Larry English little dude.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna go skinny black guy.

[Adam Ferrar]

I'm going skinny cockneyed Englishman.

[John Holmberg]

Really?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Toledo]

I think Brett, you're the closest.

[Adam Ferrar]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Nailed it. It's an average dude.

[Adam Ferrar]

It's the best Grot can do.

[John Holmberg]

I'm looking at the picture of the scales of justice. It's just a bra. That's just a bra, man.

[Brett Vesely]

We need Lady Liberty behind us.

[Adam Ferrar]

I mean, I'll have to merge a bunch of different images.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's just a bra.

[Brett Vesely]

Good start though.

[John Holmberg]

I guess it's a little crude.

[Adam Ferrar]

Boy, they really this made making AI no fun. They put all the brakes on everything. Everything I can't do.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, Scott Haynes points out. Have you ever noticed it's Judge Judy and Judge Wapner?

[Toledo]

That's true.

[John Holmberg]

These guys have been in law for a long time.

[Toledo]

We had a guy in Jackson, Alabama. He was crushed not once but twice in a garbage truck. Compacted twice while being in there. The person driving the truck is trying to stop by a kfc, unloaded it. It was a commercial dumpster. Yeah, the guy was sleeping in it, Unloaded that, dumped it in there. Didn't know that. Then the next stop was Popeyes. And when he got out of the truck at Popeyes, he heard the yelling.

[John Holmberg]

Brady, you're just making this. No Brady for Brett.

[Adam Ferrar]

Come on.

[Toledo]

Highway 43.

[John Holmberg]

He doesn't pick up any trash outside of KFC's and Popeyes.

[Toledo]

Well, yeah, he's not going to call. When the driver arrived at Popeyes, he heard the man calling for help.

[Adam Ferrar]

This story was written by Ebony. AI.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there's. You are. You're prejudice. There aren't Popeyes first off. There's not Popeyes and KFCs right next to each other.

[Toledo]

They're not that far apart.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, they are. Why would you open a Popeyes in Alabama?

[Toledo]

They're all over the place.

[John Holmberg]

They make them with their feet.

[Toledo]

The truck was a Hellcat trash truck. It's unbelievable, right?

[John Holmberg]

That's enough.

[Brett Vesely]

Detector going off.

[John Holmberg]

He didn't get smashed twice. He was living in a KFC dumpster.

[Toledo]

He was sleeping in the dumpster. The guy picked him up, dumped him up. Dumped him, squished it, did the compacting.

[John Holmberg]

Opened it up, went over to it.

[Toledo]

There might have been another stop in between, but they said then he pulled over the Popeyes.

[John Holmberg]

You said his name and it was.

[Toledo]

Compacted the second time. That's where a person heard yelling.

[John Holmberg]

You said it was his next stop. Well, it creating more your Ms. Now you're basically selling the story the way you want it to read.

[Adam Ferrar]

You doctored the photo.

[John Holmberg]

That's right. You doctored the photo for him, for your audience.

[Toledo]

All I have in the story is.

[John Holmberg]

No. What? Doesn't matter what you have. What you said.

[Toledo]

Garbage truck on Wednesday at 5:30 in the morning. The man was compacted twice. First KFC off Highway 43 and then again.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Toledo]

At the Hampton Inn next door. Then when the driver. Hampton Inn in between.

[John Holmberg]

There's the story for real. Thank you. Ms.

[Toledo]

Arrived at the Popeyes. Yep.

[John Holmberg]

I got a crazy route out there now driving around out here in my car and how the hell did I get in here anyway? I got to go to the kfc. Then we're stopping the churches.

[Toledo]

The.

[John Holmberg]

I got the Popeyes.

[Toledo]

That's shut off on the second compact.

[John Holmberg]

What is that?

[Adam Ferrar]

Somebody lit a bird in.

[John Holmberg]

There was ceiling birds in my truck. That is a racist story you told Brady without even being raced. I believe him.

[Toledo]

Kfc, Hampton Inn, Popeyes.

[John Holmberg]

Hampton Inn's change all that much? Yes, because your eyes people in the room. This is why we can't have cameras in here. Because Brady went. Just hear my eyes go towards Brett. First he got picked up at the.

[Toledo]

KF.

[John Holmberg]

And then his next stop was Popeyes. Your words. You were feeding that beast. Come on, you have no shame.

[Toledo]

Last there was a survey of American couples asking them how often Are they having sex? 25% of American couples say they have sex only one time per month or less. 24% say it happens occasionally two or three times a month. 26% say regularly four or five times. And there's 25% that say they have it eight or more times a month.

[John Holmberg]

If it's not five or more a month, your wife is failing you.

[Toledo]

71% report being satisfied with their sex lives. 43.

[Brett Vesely]

Because her wife was standing right next to him.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. Are you happy with your sex? Oh, they asked you a question there, Robert. Are you gonna answer him? Are you happy with the sex we have, Bob? Yeah, everything's great.

[Toledo]

She's awesome.

[John Holmberg]

It's constant love. It never ending.

[Toledo]

The average couple does the deed four times per month for 18.6 minutes each time. That adds up to about 15 hours over a course of a year.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. No jokes. Be honest. Are you an 18 minute guy from process?

[Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

No. You just get her done.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Let's get this going.

[Toledo]

Yeah. Once we start going, it's over. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Look at that.

[Toledo]

I don't think. I don't think it would be 18.

[John Holmberg]

Why'd you go some hound dog on that? Yeah, that's pretty much it.

[Toledo]

Depends.

[John Holmberg]

Pump, pump, sleep.

[Adam Ferrar]

Isn't that everybody?

[Toledo]

Why'd you have so many pumps in there?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's a double pump. That was a big Friday.

[Toledo]

Which interesting is 27% of people say their partner rarely or never surprises them with a nice gesture. 54% said they wish their partner would surprise them more with sex, which goes back with the answer that you're saying, oh, their. Their partner was in the room with them when they're answering some of the questions.

[John Holmberg]

All a man wants is to be desired. That's it. You. You've won the battle if you act like you like him. We don't care about anything else. Something, something. Check out Homework's Morning Sickness podcast at.

[Toledo]

98Kupd.Com Football's biggest game is right in front of us and you still got time to get in on the action with underdog. It's Brady from the morning sickness. And playing on Underdog is so easy. Go to the app. Pick players to go higher or lower on their stats and if your picks are right, you could win 5, 000 times your money. I'm going to go higher on Sam old passing yards. So download the underdog app today and use promo code HMS to score $75 in fantasy bonus entries when you play your first $5. Underdog make picks win money. Must be 18 19 in Alabama and Nebraska, 19 in Colorado for some games, 21+ in Arizona, Massachusetts and Virginia and present in state where underdog fantasy operates. Terms apply. See assets.underdogfantasy.com web play and getterms. Underscore dfs underscore.HTML for details. Offer not valid in Maryland, Michigan, New Jersey, New York, Ohio and Pennsylvania. Concerned with your play, call 1-800-G or visit www.ncpgambling.org. in New York, call the 24.7Hope line at 1-87-7-8, HOPE NY or text Hopeny to 467-369.

[Brett Vesely]

It's Brett Vesli from the morning Sickness, and I want to let you guys know about my friends over at Divine Design Landscaping. These guys have been great. They've been taking care of my house. And you guys have heard that I've had a lot of stuff going on lately. It's been great to take something off my plate. These guys handle everything. Lawn care, irrigation, tree work, low voltage lighting, 3D designs, patios. You name it, they can do it. So start the new year off right and get a free qu. DivineDesignLawnCare.com and ask for the HMS Friends and Family Rate. That's DivineDesignLawnCare.com Morning Sickness.

[John Holmberg]

Just act like you like us. If you show interest, we're happy. It's. It's not.

[Brett Vesely]

We are so.

[Toledo]

It goes a mile.

[John Holmberg]

We are so uncomplicated, it goes two miles. So uncomplicated. It's and. And trying to make more of it. It's just show interest and we'll be interested.

[Adam Ferrar]

Show us a boob every once in a while.

[John Holmberg]

Look at how excited it got when Rick was showing us his boobs. I mean, come on. He seemed interested.

[Brett Vesely]

Absolutely.

[John Holmberg]

Show interest. Act like you want to do stuff. And we're like, all right, you're gonna get everything. You're gonna get everything. You guys make it so hard.

[Toledo]

I got a couple of radio videos. First one is a one of Toledo and I's clients. Roller skates.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, some nasty flapjacks. Heading towards Fat man and the Cuck law firm. Oh, boy.

[Toledo]

She might have been sighted, too, on the street.

[Brett Vesely]

Gonna get her out of this one.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Can you guys get her off, so to speak? She's gonna go to jail. She's going to jail.

[Adam Ferrar]

Yeah, we'll get her.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

All right, so it's a lady with gross breasts.

[Toledo]

There we go.

[John Holmberg]

Roller skating, or everybody's doing. Oh, she's having. Oh, she just. She uses another person by the way.

[Adam Ferrar]

That's a pen.

[John Holmberg]

When she gets out of control.

[Toledo]

Illegal use of a bigot.

[John Holmberg]

She grabs a bigger woman to break her fall. Who's unsuspecting.

[Toledo]

Her choice between the two is smarter.

[John Holmberg]

Well, she just took the closest. By the way, who thought it was a good idea to put Babar on roller skates and send her down a hill. Big girls going down hills on wheels is bad. That was. Somebody's trying to kill her.

[Adam Ferrar]

She might have snatched ankle at the end there, too.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, she's definitely one of your clients.

[Brett Vesely]

Snapped a cankle, huh?

[John Holmberg]

Those cankles are safe.

[Toledo]

We cashed in on that one.

[Adam Ferrar]

Yeah, our law firm can't help with that.

[John Holmberg]

Good news is she's got all that padding, that no one was hurt when she hit the ground after the fall.

[Brett Vesely]

Other than the asphalt. Might have a. Oh, the asphalt suit against her.

[John Holmberg]

The city's got some repair work. There'll be some barricades around that hole she made.

[Toledo]

Next one's a motorcycle jump.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Toledo]

His own.

[John Holmberg]

Whoa.

[Toledo]

Over a house.

[John Holmberg]

He jumps over a house.

[Toledo]

Yeah, it doesn't quite make it.

[John Holmberg]

Almost gets. Oh, that's a.

[Toledo]

Look.

[John Holmberg]

He goes about a hundred yards, though.

[Adam Ferrar]

Is it better that he falls down the incline than landing flat?

[Toledo]

I think they say the guy's name Jason. Is it Borowski?

[John Holmberg]

Where is this?

[Brett Vesely]

Like, Ireland?

[John Holmberg]

It's beautiful. This house on top of, like, a hill and that gorgeous green everywhere. As the dumbest Irishman in the world tries to jump a house from a hunt.

[Brett Vesely]

You wear a mi. Cat.

[John Holmberg]

He's gonna. He's got a mick helmet on. Gonna try to jump your house. The ramp is so far away.

[Adam Ferrar]

Why are you doing that?

[John Holmberg]

The hell you doing that for? You got to go at least 200 miles an hour to get over the house from that ramp that's built at least 80 yards from the front of the house. I've been drinking. I can do this.

[Toledo]

The last one's a matador skewer.

[John Holmberg]

Count on it. I'm going over your house. It's not rolled away or not. You're not gonna make it. Oh, my God. A bull just picked a man up by the spine.

[Toledo]

He had the picador out, and he got picked right.

[John Holmberg]

Right through his butthole. And he picked him up and carried him around by the horn for.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, the medics come out there. Just bring me a gun.

[John Holmberg]

I'm killing myself through the butt. God. How do bulls know where our buttholes are? It seems like that's where they aim. They know the weak point. They know where matadors butthole is because those horns hit it almost. Oh, man.

[Toledo]

Planked.

[John Holmberg]

He's in the full 2011 plank move. Oh, my God. Toledo. You just accidentally airdropped that to my phone. It's now playing on my phone. I gotta watch this matador get butt planked by the.

[Toledo]

It doesn't get old.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's the gift that keeps giving. All right, Brett, what do you got?

[Brett Vesely]

All right, we'll start off light, and we'll go from there.

[John Holmberg]

All right, we're at a club. We're dancing. It's not a nice place. This guy grabs the pole, puts his hands behind the pole. He's leaning on it. He tries to go up and do a backflip. It lands directly on his head on a dirt floor in a country only Toledo would go to go to. That's kind of proven Brady's point. They're eating with their feet again.

[Toledo]

That might have been a restaurant. Well, here.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's a restaurant.

[John Holmberg]

It's next to a Chipotle. There's a guy sitting in, and he's just taking a huge. He's pooping his pants in a restaurant, and it's coming out of the top. It's rooster.

[Toledo]

Over the canvas.

[Adam Ferrar]

Not to bring Brady's racism back into this, but you see what nationality he might be?

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Brett Vesely]

How do you know?

[Adam Ferrar]

Look at his head again. Maybe.

[John Holmberg]

What are you talking about? Look at him. What's wrong with his head? Look right there.

[Brett Vesely]

What am I missing?

[John Holmberg]

What am I missing?

[Toledo]

He thinks he might be Indian.

[John Holmberg]

He's just a white guy. I'm pretty sure he's just a white guy. He's just dropping a huge deuce out of his jeans.

[Toledo]

Hispanic. I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

What.

[Toledo]

I don't.

[John Holmberg]

I don't see. What you guys are seeing.

[Toledo]

Is that a blood pressure cuff.

[John Holmberg]

It's not working. He's taking his bp and you would know. Yeah. He's sitting there thinking to himself, I don't feel so good.

[Brett Vesely]

I. Asian dinner.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Oh, God. It's a naked Asian squatting. She's got something in her mouth. She's chewing it. She's gonna spit it on us. Oh, she's gonna throw up. But we're gonna.

[Toledo]

Another client of ours.

[John Holmberg]

It's from the. I think what it is.

[Adam Ferrar]

Yeah, it's from down.

[John Holmberg]

Is it poop? Yep. She's eating poop and hovering over the camera. Naked, but. Oh, there's another spoon going in, and it's. It's that orange stuff. It's Taco Bell poop. Oh, man. I Hate the planet.

[Brett Vesely]

All right, man, get away from poop for a minute.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, for a minute? Yeah, for a minute. So many videos of different people. There's a girl with her own fist.

[Adam Ferrar]

In her butt searching for poop there.

[Brett Vesely]

Come on.

[John Holmberg]

She's got her. She's reached behind herself, and she's. She's puppeteering her own body. There's her hand, and her hand is in her tummy. And you can see it pushing through her skinny little tummy.

[Toledo]

Christmas tree, all the toys, you know.

[John Holmberg]

She'S got a good Christmas coming her way, so to speak. Look at her. She's pointing to it. Like we wouldn't notice her tummy moving around with her hand in it. She's limber.

[Byron]

Wow.

[Toledo]

That's part of her protesting activity.

[John Holmberg]

That's right. Ice out now, or I don't stop doing this.

[Adam Ferrar]

And she's flipping the bird in there.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe. Yeah. It's her own inner protest. All right, here's another one. Girl in a boat drinking beer in a USA bikini top. That's not really. Well, she got an AR15 now. Oh, that's a transvestite getting a. I was fooled. I was fooled. Yeah, I was fooled. That is a. All right, I'll try to do play by play on that a second time. There we go.

[Brett Vesely]

Ready?

[John Holmberg]

All right. First thing we see is a lady holding an AR15 firing it in an American bikini top. And then it pans back, it zooms out, and it turns out that this lady firing the gun ain't a lady at all. She's got a nice hog. And there's a. Another woman performing a mouth hug on that woman's penis.

[Brett Vesely]

We're not taking. We're not taking her as a client.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no. We wouldn't even be fooled by the breasts. First I was thinking, it's a hell of a woman out there guzzling a tall boy and shooting her AR15 and her USA and then I saw her dick, and I'm like, oh, we'll show that one to Adam and see if he's all right. Well, there's more.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's some talent for you.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no. Oh, God. It's a woman tying her labia in a knot. And it's her inner labia. She's got, like. What's in there? Balloon animals over here. She's doing balloon animals with her puppetry of the labia.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

A delicate process. She's tied it into a little slipknot around her thong. Wow. Which is now stretched out. Yeah, she looked good, except for the meat curtains.

[Toledo]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

The cans are fantastic. She is in our law firm.

[Adam Ferrar]

Did I miss the beginning? Is it like.

[John Holmberg]

No, I just started tying them together.

[Brett Vesely]

I was just. Just balloon animals right away.

[Adam Ferrar]

Well, all right.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. It's like your shoelaces. Her labia are like shoelaces. I've never said that phrase in my entire life, ever.

[Brett Vesely]

Trying to bring back a trend.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Strawberry. Oh, I can snort. Oh, no. Oh, geez. It's a lady with a funnel in her nostril, and a guy is finishing in the funnel, and it's draining into her nose.

[Toledo]

Come on, Navaj.

[John Holmberg]

It is. Yeah, she's got a.

[Brett Vesely]

This is.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Then she goes.

[Toledo]

See it? But the sound.

[John Holmberg]

All right, now that you guys know.

[Brett Vesely]

What just happened, Trash can to Brady this time.

[John Holmberg]

Quick refresher. He's finishing, and he's finishing. And it's a Peter north style video into a funnel into this woman's nostril. She's got, like, a neti pot kind of thing going. Yeah. And now she snorts it all through the funnel. That one's hard for you. Yeah, I know. It's kind of hot.

[Brett Vesely]

All right, then we'll finish with this. Come on.

[John Holmberg]

She's a swallower, and she's found new ways to make it fun. All right, there's an Asian woman sitting on a bed with her hands next to her. Looks to be another Asian woman approaching her.

[Adam Ferrar]

The same soundtrack.

[John Holmberg]

It just throws up on her. Twice in the lap three times. This lady has been eating tacos for days. Oh, she's going in for the UCLA bill. Oh, another Asian has shown up, and they're all throwing up on her.

[Toledo]

How did she fall yet?

[John Holmberg]

She isn't. The other one's just dry. Heavy. The fat one is just a vomitorium. Oh, she's decided to sit with her ass in the air now and get thrown up on that one. What does that girl have? Oh, those are great Asian cans. And now the fat one reaches into her throat. Now Buddha won't stop puking on this beautiful lady. Now she's nude, and all the Asians are throwing up on her using devices. What is she holding?

[Toledo]

Is she sticking a fish down his throat?

[John Holmberg]

Brady, that's prejudice again. She is not just. Just jamming fish in her throat. Oh, my God, she's crying.

[Brett Vesely]

Nice cans, though.

[John Holmberg]

She's beautiful. Yeah, that lady that got puked on 30 times, she got on the photo radar.

[Brett Vesely]

That could make it into the top 10.

[John Holmberg]

It's just proof that even she's got.

[Adam Ferrar]

Credits on photo radar.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, even Asian Uncles mess women up. God damn it. That one got me. I like that one. I'm just glad she didn't start spooning it up. That's what I was expecting after the. The big fat Buddha one was just full of vomit.

[Toledo]

That was mega volume.

[John Holmberg]

Well, it's time for a guest. Clean up the. Clean up the room, kids. We've got guests.

[Brett Vesely]

We have. Victor here has basically come up with our.

[John Holmberg]

I think we're out there.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, there we go. I think he screwed.

[John Holmberg]

I wrecked it. What's it say?

[Brett Vesely]

It's for our law.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, here it goes.

[Toledo]

Here goes.

[John Holmberg]

Our law firm has a specialties, says counselor. Your law firm has all four of you, and each one specializes in certain law matters. Holmberg works on white collar and financial crimes. I see what he's doing there. Brett specializes in criminal cases and organized crime. Toledo family law matters. And Brady food law and consumer protections. You've got it covered. Thank you, Victor. That is the whop and the jew, and it's a beautiful thing. Adam Ferrar is going to come back in here this morning. We had so much fun with him yesterday. And evidently tickets didn't move. So he's back again today to try to sell some tickets for his shows this weekend. We'll talk to Adam next. It's 98.

[Toledo]

It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee.

[John Holmberg]

I have heard enough of this. It's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness and I'm absolutely thrilled to tell you about my new [e-mail]. here's the proof that me talking about something on the radio can be trusted because I purchased a 2024 customized Ford Bronco from the gang at lifted trucks. That opened my eyes to who and what these guys are all about. They not only have thousands of trucks to choose from, they also have nationwide shipping and they can get anything anywhere. My Bronco's been customized. Countless other pro athletes and celebrities. Now little old me choose lifted trucks and lifted trucks dot com. Work hard, play hard, drive harder. It's John Holmer here from the morning sickness for lifechangerloan.com when you're dealing with hundreds of thousands of dollars, you want people in your camp who are legit and have a solid rep. And I don't think it gets much more solid than an a plus from the better business bureau. Not a lot of banks have that, but life changer loan does. People who have made this move to life change alone all say this is better than the old way. And they recognize that it's just a matter of going to the website, doing a little math and seeing if it's right for them. If you're great with your money, just check it out and live that A plus life because there is no catch. It's not magic, it's just math. Lifechangerloan.com.