01-31-25 - Emailer Listened To KTAR Ladonna In San Diego - Ravens Kicker Justin Tucker Accused Of Misconduct By 6 Massage Spa Workers - Comments Section Missed The Point After John Watched The Holocaust Movie The Survivor

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: January 31, 2025 Episode Summary

Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Show: Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD

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1. Introduction and Listener Feedback

Timestamp: [00:31]
John Holmberg opens the episode by greeting listeners and introducing himself along with his co-hosts Brady, Bret, and Dick Toledo. He shares a humorous listener email praising his impersonation of Ladonna Harvey from KTAR News in San Diego.

Notable Quote:
John Holmberg: "Your impersonation is nearly spot on. It’s a female version of Dale."

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2. Ladonna Harvey Impersonation and Interactions

Timestamp: [02:02] - [05:31]
The hosts engage in a comedic impersonation of Ladonna Harvey, exaggerating her loud and bombastic style. They joke about her interactions with listeners and other personalities, blending humor with satire.

Notable Quote:
Brady: "Come towards me. I have Helen destroyed."

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3. Justin Tucker Misconduct Accusations

Timestamp: [06:50] - [19:18]
The main segment delves into allegations against Ravens' kicker Justin Tucker. The hosts discuss accusations from six massage spa workers who claim misconduct involving inappropriate behavior. They critique Tucker's public persona, highlighting his religious demeanor juxtaposed with the alleged actions.

Notable Quotes:
John Holmberg: "Justin Tucker... can't stop whipping his religious dick out and beaten off."
John Holmberg: "Even if these accusations are false, I'm gonna let this myth live forever."

The discussion extends to compare Tucker's behavior with other sports figures, mentioning Robert Kraft and Ben Roethlisberger, suggesting a pattern of misconduct within the sports community.

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4. Review of "The Survivor" Movie

Timestamp: [19:14] - [36:55]
The hosts shift focus to a movie review of "The Survivor," a film portraying a Holocaust survivor's struggle. They critique the film's portrayal of historical events, the inclusion of sports elements, and the involvement of actors like Danny DeVito and Rocky Marciano. The conversation highlights their disappointment with the movie's execution and its handling of sensitive historical topics.

Notable Quotes:
John Holmberg: "There’s nothing that happened when you punch. They were in the 40s."
John Holmberg: "It's not the Nazi Holocaust."

The hosts express frustration with the movie's lack of depth and perceived trivialization of Holocaust experiences, emphasizing the importance of respectful and accurate historical representation.

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5. Closing Remarks

Timestamp: [36:54] - [37:15]
John Holmberg wraps up the discussion with light-hearted banter, referencing their ongoing critiques and humorous exchanges. The episode concludes with the typical sign-off, encouraging listeners to tune in again.

Notable Quote:
Brady: "It's pretty cool, actually."

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Key Takeaways

• Humorous Satire: The episode features sharp satire, especially in impersonating media personalities like Ladonna Harvey, blending humor with critique.

• Serious Allegations: The segment on Justin Tucker brings attention to misconduct allegations within the sports industry, reflecting on the contrast between public personas and personal actions.

• Cinematic Critique: The discussion on "The Survivor" underscores the hosts' perspective on handling sensitive historical narratives in film, advocating for respectful and accurate portrayals.

• Engaged Hosts: Throughout the episode, the hosts maintain an engaging and dynamic interaction, balancing humor with serious topics to entertain and provoke thought among listeners.

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Note: This summary aims to capture the essence of the podcast episode as presented in the transcript, focusing on key discussions and insights while maintaining a respectful and informative tone.

Transcript

[Dick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

War II Morning sickness.

[Brady]

The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail. Good morning everybody. Hello there.

[John Holmberg]

Welcome to Friday. It's 5:45. This is the morning sickness. My name is John. There's Brady, there's Brett, There's Big Dick Toledo, there's. She's always omnipresent. I got an email from a guy who says I was listening to the podcast and I was cracking up big time about Ladonna Harvey going in with you to the Rah Rah room. Your impersonation is nearly spot on. It's not. This used to be on the morning news in San Diego here, where I live. And you are correct, she is bombastic with those pipes. A female version of Dale.

[Brett]

She would be louder than the PA Announcer at the Suns game.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, we would need a microphone.

[Brett]

Exactly.

[Brady]

Grayson Allen for 1, 2, 3. Hey. Shazam. Time out, timberwolves who can also suck mag. Whoops. Excuse me. There it is. Timely done. Army cage here and you can't get.

[John Holmberg]

Enough of that one.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Wonder if she gets calls from the Coast Guard or something saying, you know, heavy fog today.

[Brady]

We can use your pipes, providing you, no problem. All ships at sea listen to the D Hermes warning.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Follow the voice.

[Brady]

Come towards me. I have Helen destroyed.

[Big Dick Toledo]

I know exactly where to go.

[John Holmberg]

I find her to be endlessly entertaining and I don't understand exactly why. I really enjoy when she starts yelling and screaming and she's just talking good stuff all the way around. I. I don't know. I get. I like her. So she'll be around.

[Brett]

Poor Jim.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's got to try to compete with that voice. Quivery.

[Brady]

I'm the daughter, Harvey, KTR News. And I'm. I'm with him.

[John Holmberg]

I'm Jim Sharp.

[Brady]

Quivering bitch.

[John Holmberg]

KTR News.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Master Blaster.

[John Holmberg]

In the morning, it's non stop for me. When I first hear it I don't know why that is.

[Big Dick Toledo]

I'm picturing Jim on her shoulders.

[Brady]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

She's at home. Should we heard her at the. Like, she's out. Every time she talks, people in Las Vegas are like, what is that rambling rumbling noise?

[Brady]

These microphones are useless for a woman like me. Move them.

[Big Dick Toledo]

New emergency alert system.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Hello, Mr. Wife Home? How dare you. I'm sorry, sir. I didn't. Look, sir. I don't know what that means. I don't exactly know what that means. It is, ma'am. That's what that means. KG News. I'm gonna call another time. What time is your wife at home? Sam? I'm gonna crawl through this floor. I'm gonna tear your head off and crap down your neck.

[John Holmberg]

She turns into chest.

[Brady]

She's just.

[John Holmberg]

She's morphing. She's powerful is what I'm saying.

[Brady]

Am I clear? She's got. Are we clear? Are we clear? Crystal. Right.

[John Holmberg]

Suppose.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Look at you. And you're.

[Brady]

Now you stand there in that incredibly white uniform and extend me a little courtesy. I have no idea what you're talking about. Individual person whose gender is not to be revealed through pronouns. No. Clearly. I'm a w. I'm a lovely flower with needs and wants. Tender skin and a menstrual cycle. All right, I gotta go. I'm sorry I even bothered with this phone call. Just wanted to let you know. You wanted. You won a charity prize.

[Big Dick Toledo]

You need me on the news?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Get down to places. Gym Sharp doesn't like to talk about. You want me on that news wall. You need me on that news. Well, we're gonna get sued.

[John Holmberg]

And I want it to happen. I want. I want a cease and desist. I. So you said. Please stop doing crazy version of Nathan Jessup.

[Brady]

As with on the head. I protect the news. Who's gonna do it? You, Sharp? You broomhead? We live in a world with news walls. And I protect those walls. Truth. I deliver the news in a certain manner that keeps you safe. Provides a blanket of news that only I can give. And you question the manner in which I provide it. Roller go traffic is okay, Ladonna. Whatever you say.

[John Holmberg]

It was quick. I've already gotten the cease and desist really quickly. From whom? From Ladonna. Oh, no kidding. Already? Geez. Did she email you? Oh, shoot, she's just shouting it. You'd hear it coming down the street anyway.

[Brett]

And they're a few miles away too. But it's still here.

[John Holmberg]

It's bouncing off the mountains.

[Brady]

For those who don't know.

[John Holmberg]

She's a new. A new voice in town.

[Big Dick Toledo]

And she ordered a code red on.

[Brady]

Ned Foster big time.

[John Holmberg]

Anyway, yeah, that's just a thing. You listen to the news for a second to see that the world hasn't exploded. And you hear Ladonna start yelling the news out. Start laughing.

[Brett]

We've already got a request for Ladonna Jessup for the Square.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe that's a thing. Jessup may have to. She's an unknown. But we're definitely helping out. Hey, look, kjr, Congratulations. You get a ratings boost. It's not cuz Ladonna is so great. It's because we pushed our stuff over there. We have no problem with that. Wonder why? We got 4 years and 11 months to go. I mean, that's all I care about. Each month is another lap around the track. And also, I couldn't be happier today. I'm in a great mood. I mean, just an absolutely great mood. Because Justin. Justin Tucker, the kicker for the Ravens, can't stop whipping his religious dick out and beaten off.

[Dick Toledo]

There's a trend.

[John Holmberg]

Ravens, Justin Tuggar, if you haven't heard yet, of all the players, incredibly religious opera singer and field goal kicker Justin Tucker has six ladies who do massage therapy that all came out at the same time going, hey, he did that to me too. That guy cannot stop on the tables of massage therapists. So Justin.

[Brady]

Justin Tugger.

[John Holmberg]

Always talking about the Lord wears his cross, won't shut up about the Jesus. Also, when he's not talking about the Jesus, he's forcing his erection into the hands of a massage therapist. And that's a football thing. That's a football thing. Big time.

[Big Dick Toledo]

I'm telling you. It's like, you know, the minute you start going to a variety, right, Find.

[John Holmberg]

One that'll beat you off and stick with it. Stick with it and show some discretion. It's like, I really like when they wonder if this one will do it. And then you start chasing around. Eventually you're gonna get one that goes, hey.

[Big Dick Toledo]

But also, you know, at the same time, they're not traveling with you. So if they're on the road, right?

[John Holmberg]

How bad do you need a massage?

[Brady]

You're at a race, you're a kicker.

[Big Dick Toledo]

I mean, come and there's people on the staff.

[John Holmberg]

There's gotta be somebody that'll be like, I'll help you out, Justin, but I'm not gonna jerk you off. And that's the problem. The people on the staff won't give him a jerk. And he doesn't like Doing it himself anymore.

[Brady]

And it's.

[John Holmberg]

He's got. He's gotta be like, hey, I think.

[Brady]

It may be, oh, Figaro, Figaro.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you sing opera. Yeah. I'm just trying to impress you so you give me a jerk.

[Brady]

Would you mind that?

[John Holmberg]

I don't want to jerk you off.

[Brady]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Pray with me. Pray with me. Justin Tucker.

[Brett]

Maybe Deshaun Watson's gonna start going to church with him now or something.

[John Holmberg]

Anything bad that happens to Baltimore Ravens e with. Even if these accusations are false, I'm gonna let this myth live forever. Justin Tucker. Hate him. Always have, always will. He's a good kicker, but this is. This is the best news I could ever get. And I'm. And I'm grateful to his lord that he put him in these terrible situations to get his wang jerked by multiple people. I think it's fantastic. Justin Tuggar.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Deshawn. What do I do?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, don't ask him what to do.

[Brady]

Oh, my beer. Why don't you get, like, 27 more.

[John Holmberg]

Ladies and then try to, like, make some of them bad people?

[Big Dick Toledo]

You got to double.

[Brady]

You just gotta keep doing it, man. Do you. You. Do you? God bless.

[John Holmberg]

And I told my friend yesterday, the best part of this whole thing is as much as that guy talks about the lord and his guidance and that he won't shut up about religion, is that the one thing he's not gonna make it directly through the middle of the pearly gates. He's going wide right. Everybody doink, doink. Oh, that was Justin Tucker trying to get into heaven. He dunked off.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Doink, doink, double doink.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's too good. Too damn good. Too good. Well, Justin died today. If you listen carefully, you'll hear him get into heaven.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Tried to get in again.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's no good.

[Big Dick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

A life no good. As the opera sings his way right into hell. And I don't care, Rick. I don't believe in either play, so it's easy for me to joke about. But, man, oh, man, when you decide to start telling everybody else how pious you are, like how wonderful you live your life and how clean you are, now you're out there getting handy. You know who's got.

[Big Dick Toledo]

If you're gonna bet on anybody, you know that you'd hear how many players.

[John Holmberg]

No, people that loud are always. They're the ones that that dude wouldn't shut up about. He's going in the only time he heard inter. Like, Justin Tucker was a kicker who got interviewed because of his. I mean, he just doesn't fit In. In football. He's. He's gonna be a pastor when he's done.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Stay clean. But.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but there's another strong. But there's another one you gotta watch.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Although he's the only one I didn't realize.

[John Holmberg]

He's just. He's old school. That guy Harrison Butler never did anything wrong. Everybody tried to be mad at him because they didn't like his views, but his views were his views, and none of them were wrong. And what he said at that commitment commencement speech a couple years ago, it's exactly what that school wanted to hear. Is a religious super school saying, hey, ladies, I don't know if you read the book we all talk about too much, but it's not a bad idea to stay home and raise your kids and be good at that. And most of you probably want to do that deep down. That's why you're.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Don't look at it as a bad thing.

[John Holmberg]

Right? Don't. Yeah, but he even said it. He's like, you probably want that more than a career. What's wrong with that? A family and all that. That's why we're at this Christian school. That's why you had me do this. I thought he was a little bit batty, but the people he was talking to, it made sense. But, yeah, that. That getting beat off by those massage therapist thing in footballs. There's. That's over 50% of them have at least done it. There's no way Justin Tucker's finding all these on his own. Desean Watson's finds. He's got a bird whispering, hey, man, this one over here got me. There's guys who are talking. Robert Kraft.

[Big Dick Toledo]

There's a Rolodex.

[John Holmberg]

Robert Kraft was doing it for much longer than the one time he got lazy and parked his powder blue Rolls Royce in front of that massage parlor in Florida. He wasn't even at home. And he was. And he was in a massage parlor trying to get a hand job. These guys know the places to go. You don't just show up in your powder blue Rolls.

[Big Dick Toledo]

What?

[John Holmberg]

And then go, what?

[Ladonna Harvey]

They give hand jobs, too.

[John Holmberg]

That came on good authority, and probably, in my opinion, came on good authority from either Tiger woods or Tom Brady, who lived nearby that place. He was down in Tampa.

[Brady]

Holmberg's morning sickness. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Big Dick Toledo]

28. Can you repeat it?

[Brady]

Holmberg's morning sickness.

[John Holmberg]

I'm thinking Tom's like. Robert's like, I want a massage. He's like, all right, I got a place for you. Just I wouldn't park the blue Rolls in front of it. That's going to turn some heads, but sure, if you want to.

[Big Dick Toledo]

He probably was mostly upset. I'm like, oh, no, now I got to get a new leaf. A new tenant in that building. He probably owned, maybe.

[John Holmberg]

Bottom line is he knew 60 or 70 different places. And then one told on him. You just have to be. And it wasn't even the lady inside that told on him. People just saw us. Rolls Royce in front of the Tug house. That's a. Hey, Robert Kraft just got out of that Rolls Royce in front of the Tug house. And he went in. He went in, calling the news.

[Brett]

Rent a Sonata or something for the day and just drive it over there.

[John Holmberg]

Don't. Don't bring your powder rolls. The girl to come to you, but.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Booby, I've been doing it for two years.

[Brady]

Why?

[John Holmberg]

In going to the strip mall, each.

[Brett]

Team should have a rub and tug brought on.

[John Holmberg]

On staff.

[Brett]

It would just keep a lot of things.

[John Holmberg]

Just when the Suns won all the games in 2020, when the bubble. And then the news broke, like, the Suns were terrible. Like, they get invited to the bubble for God knows what reason. They weren't a good team yet. And they went 8, 0 in the bubble. You're like, they're almost in the playoffs. They might win this thing. And it came out that right before they got on that little streak, a hooker banged the entire team in one room in a day.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Was she doing it right or were they paying for something?

[John Holmberg]

I mean, she was a whore. I don't know if they paid her, but she was an absolute. She was a professional. I don't know if she was charging them. She just enjoyed the idea. She was, like, doing porn and taking money for sex. So, yeah, I don't know if she did that with them, but they snuck her into the bubble, which nobody was supposed to get in from the outside, and she boned the whole team. And the Suns went on a crazy run. It happens all the time. It's just.

[Big Dick Toledo]

But see, they were smart. They kept it to one person, not six.

[John Holmberg]

But even then, when the sons are sipping out of the same milk jug, literally, and they're all like, that was fun. I'm gonna swim around in Chris Paul's mess. And then the next game, that's what they were doing. I know. For it's the two, but Justin Tuggar is a Raven, so it's. It's. Look, when Ravens fall, my heart grows a little bit. I'm happier. Ravens getting hand jobs on the Reg and getting busted. But just. God damn it. I might cry a little. Guys, you have to give me this one. It's. Oh, little Justin Tuggar.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Find out. It's the entire.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Special teams.

[John Holmberg]

My guy, Ben Snapper.

[Big Dick Toledo]

We need it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. People will fire. But what about Roethlisberger? That was two. And both of them were. You know. Ben Roethlisberger's crime was not rape. It was being mean to the girls. After he finished, he pulled a power move by a dude. He banged him. And then he got. And we have all had it. We all got that we gotta get her out of here feeling. And then she left, thinking that it was love and he's powerful and everything else. And then he just left. He left in the Reno one's. The, like, the biggest dick move you can make where he, you know, had the girl up there. I think he made a couple of promises about dinners and things like that. She's like, oh, my God, this is gonna happen. She emailed friends. I was with Ben Roethlisberger last night, and we're going to dinner tomorrow. He's here for the golf tournament. And it is just. I mean, I felt. And then. But in the background, you see his private jets leaving Reno a day early because I made a mistake.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Oh, my God. I think I might have been raped.

[John Holmberg]

No, we just didn't want to see you again. You were. Everybody was in on it until he left. And then that thing that happened down in Georgia was just. He's just dumb. He went down there in his devil shirt hanging out at bars. And girl that followed him from bar to bar, he took her into the bathroom, gave her the old lozenge. But he was dumb enough to have a couple of his own offensive linemen stand outside the room and guard it.

[Brett]

Why?

[John Holmberg]

Because that girl's boyfriend couldn't get in there and see what was going on.

[Brett]

I don't know why he didn't call Derek Jeter for some pointers or something. Hire him as a consultant.

[John Holmberg]

Derek Jeter needs to do a.

[Brett]

Never got in trouble.

[John Holmberg]

They have a rookie symposium every year for every team. They go and talk to the new players. Here's what you got to look out for. And it's basically, hey, if you're going to get hand jobs at massage parlors, here's some places to go. They give them a list. We. We knew rookie used to come to the show all the time, and he gave us a list of, here's the. Here's the pizza parlors. You should not go to here's the places that they do in house bookies and bets and they're kind of tied to some nefarious criminal family activity and things. And he gave it. He's like, look at this. The big list. And that's when we found out all that stuff. They told him where to go and where not to go. You're in a city where this happens. Don't go here. Don't go here. Don't go here. They seem normal and they're gonna reach out to you. Do not go there. And that happens. So you said Derek Jeter. Go around to all the sports teams. Alright, guys, here's how it works. You're gonna want to bow in a lot of horrors. You're a professional athlete. This should be part of the. This is part of the deal that isn't included in your contract. That. That is a benefit you will experience. Now always have a gift basket at the ready, even for the ones who hate. Like you want them out of the house so fast afterwards. You're gonna repaint the walls. Cause the smell is so strong. They get a gift basket. Ben needs to give away a jersey, a football, a couple of DVDs of his best moments, bottle of champagne, couple tickets to the game in the future, stuff like that.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Oh, he.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, this is nice.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Sweet.

[John Holmberg]

And that's to say here, this is forever. Goodbye, you're done. Cedar never got in a scandal and he boned everybody in New York, but Justin Tuggar is a kicker and that makes everything different. Oh, it just. I just. Joy. There's just so much joy from this. And I can't tell you how happy it makes me. More Ravens, please. And the best part is it's a Raven scandal where no one actually died, which is a new thing for them. And I think that's even better. I mean, the only thing that died was the soul of Justin Tucker. He has to spend his eternity in hell. Now go ahead and have forgiveness. I'm not gonna do it. You should ask for a trade. You should ask for a trade to another team.

[Brett]

Go to the Browns.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I've seen.

[Big Dick Toledo]

No way you want to head to Miami.

[John Holmberg]

I've seen several interviews with that idiot and all he talks about is just, you know, a life of how hard it is to be in this and. And be a decent, you know, caring, religious man with all my. Gotta keep my convictions. Huh? Huh? You know why he's so calm?

[Brady]

I do.

[John Holmberg]

He just got a massage.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Seems so relaxed.

[John Holmberg]

He always had. Always had loose thighs and stuff for those kicks. Seemed like his leg was always rubbery. I laugh at your problems, Raven. Oh, I don't want Lamar Jackson to go out like that, though. I don't want him to have that. I want him to just keep sucking in the playoffs for like an eternity. Keep that team from ever winning anything. That's. Keep having your great regular seasons and dying in the playoffs. I'm fine with that. Ah, true joy. True joy. I did something also. I needed the Justin Tugger news and Ravens falling from the sky because last night, on the recommendation of Jay up at React defense, I watched a movie called the Survivor with Ben Foster. Came out during the pandemic. I didn't know about it. It's a boxing movie, so to speak. It's Schindler's List with boxing. And Schindler's List is a comedy compared to this thing. Jesus. I know. So just when you thought you couldn't hate the Nazis a little more, this movie comes out and it's a true story about this. This Jewish guy in Auschwitz. It was a true boxer, a real boxer who was. His nickname was. It was the pride of Poland and his nickname was the Survivor of Auschwitz. I can survive anything. Last name was Haft. And. And he had a girl he was with before the Nazis swiped everybody. And he's with this beautiful woman and he loved her and it was a love story and all that. And then right in front of him, the Nazis come rolling on and swipe her and stuff her in the back of a truck. And she's screaming, save me Hunts.

[Dick Toledo]

Go Faith.

[John Holmberg]

You know, do all that stuff. And so it's a series of flashbacks and all this other stuff. And. And him going. And he. When he wants to. You'd like it, Brett. Like, this is the thing. I know your. Your family and your side and your heritage sided with the Nazis. So this is tough for you to like. Well, what's so bad about Nazis? I can show you in this movie. My grandpa always told me that they did good work. And so I know that you. He fights Rocky Marciano. And the only reason he fights Rocky Marciano is to try to get attention nationally. So this woman who he lost before the war sees that he's still alive and reaches out to the. He wants to try to find her. He promised her I'd find her. I promised her I'd find her. And so he fights Rocky Marciano and Rocky Marciano beats the dog ass out of him, like, for. He just was. I don't think he was that great a boxer. So the reason he was boxing was because In Auschwitz, one of the Nazi guards saw him fight another Nazi guard and pulled him off and he said, you like, you like fighting high? He goes, come with me. And he takes him into the woods and he starts to train him how to box. Then he might makes him fight other Jews. And whoever loses a fight gets shot in the ring right there. Oh, and so Gladiator. So it is Gladiator, but he gets special treatment because he doesn't lose. He beats up all the Jews they put in front of him. So the Jews start hating him because now he's killing people. Well, basically, yeah. He's murdering his own people.

[Big Dick Toledo]

He doesn't have a choice.

[John Holmberg]

No. And it's the. Yeah. He's like, if I. And he does have it. And then they put him in there with guys he's friends with. He's like, I'm not gonna fight this guy. He's like, I need you to fight. I need to die. I want to die from a bullet. I don't want to go get that gas. So they start scrumming, knocks him on his ass, puts him out. And so you're just like, man, there's nothing at all about this movie that's going to have a humorous turn or there is a laugh in it, I'll tell you that. There's a funny joke. It's a. I'll save it. It's a good joke towards the end there. And he tells it at the end and I actually laugh because you'd laugh at anything at that point. Brady's dad jokes become like Patrice O'Neill material. By the end of this thing, you just want something moderately light hearted. It's good, it's worth watching. The best part about it was, though, being a true story, not understanding what this. The terrors of the concentration camp and the things this man went through and the things he saw, the things he did to survive that were, you know, when he did the news story to try to get his name out there and told the reporter, this is what I did. All the Jews here back in America turned on him like, you son of a bitch. You're a traitor. You beat up other Jews to save yourself for the entertainment and financial gain of the Nazi guards at Auschwitz. And he did. And he said, I did what I had to do. You know, awful things happen. He did what I had to do. This movie is brutal. I go on Rotten tomatoes. User score 76. Like 24% of people went, meh.

[Brady]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Wasn't that great? I'm like, come on, you can't get 14% of people like Nazis. 24%. Or critics. 14% of the critics like Nazis. 24% of the casual viewers like that. Because all this is just making hate America.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Why do I gotta watch all this? I don't know. Didn't seem like that big a deal to me. You like Nazis. If you don't. If you. If you even went online to say, you know, I've seen better. It's like Jesus Christmas. It's. You can't take a true story and tell them it was a little slow. It's like, no, it was. You just don't even review it. The people who go online and do user reviews. I'm going to go online and review this one. Not a big fan. I'm going to. I'm going to. I'm going to splat this tomato. I'm going to give it a 2 out of 5 stars.

[Brady]

Morning sickness. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

Maybe they didn't see the whole movie.

[John Holmberg]

Through their hood, right? No, I mean, my favorite review said Ben Foster's performance was pretty great. Danny DeVito's hardly in this thing. Total disappointment. I'm like, that's why you watch the Nazi. True story is not enough. Jersey Mike's Danny DeVito wondering. He was in it for a minute. He produced it. Does that count? Nah. Needed more devito for me to really care about this Nazi problem. I don't know.

[Brady]

Didn't.

[John Holmberg]

Didn't really paint the Nazis in a light that I. Not a good enough bad guy, I suppose. Needs a better villain than the entire Nazi Third Reich. How do you even take the time. How do you take the time in your life to go sit at a computer and review that? Like, I don't know. Didn't buy it. Like, it's a true story. I don't know. It wasn't very flashy. And the flashback scenes were in black and white. I don't care for black and white. So two out of five stars. This. Some of it was in Yiddish and I had to use the. I don't like reading my movies. This. I don't know how you. I don't know how you. Just leave it alone. If you didn't like it, just walk away from it and go, this one isn't up for reviews so much as it is. You know, Just watch it. Understand that this happened. You don't have to say, oh, it's one of the best movies. I'm not going to tell you it's one of the best movies I've ever watched. But it is a. You know, if you're starting to get. You know, if time's starting to slip away and you're starting to think, you know, maybe we're a little hard on the Nazis. Watch this movie. Like, nope, nope, we were right. We were right. There wasn't. There's no. No shining little dot of light that makes you go, you know, if I just tear this paper here, maybe the Nazis weren't so bad. They were. They were worse than you thought. They were worse. That's what this movie makes you. It leaves you going, wow, they were worse than I thought. And I didn't have, like, any favorable views of Nazis. Worse than I thought. I walked away going, well, the sons of bitches managed to pile another block on my bad Nazi. Grouping.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Stories like that, it just questions like, man, how can you get into that mindset?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I mean, you know, you just.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Like to believe that.

[John Holmberg]

Are you talking about the reviewers or the movie itself? Because the reviewers. To me, the reviewers are worse than the Nazis. I think the Nazis are the one positive I came from. That is if anybody that sat there and said, not enough DeVito is worse than an actual Nazi. You don't talk about missing the point of any conversation at all. Any sort of point of. Of history, saying, I might have paid more attention if the guy from Always Sunny was in it more. Well, maybe if Charlie Day came out there, started to squeak and yak, that would have been fun. But for me, if you promise me to veto and you don't deliver, I really don't care about your Nazi concentration camp strife. It just doesn't add up.

[Brett]

So there wasn't enough Marciano in it.

[John Holmberg]

Well, for. You know, you would like that. Marciano is just a. He's a machine. And it lends credibility to the world's fakest boxer of all time. And I'll give you that there's a reason why Rocky Marciano movie never was made.

[Brett]

The top two boxers of all time.

[John Holmberg]

Rocky Marcia, Rocky Balboa, The Rockies, and R2. Yeah. Yeah. And not has seemed the rock, Rock, man. He's not one of your guys.

[Big Dick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Anyway, it's just hilarious to me that anybody took the time to go, yeah, I. I get it. Enough with. Enough with the Jew movies. If you're not. If. If DeVito's not in it all the way through, what's the point?

[Brett]

What's it called again?

[John Holmberg]

The Survivor. But the reviews had me dying. It's like you walk away going, ben Foster was good, but I didn't really buy the girl as his love interest. I'm like, what?

[Big Dick Toledo]

Yeah. And if based on a true story and they decided, you know what, it was actually one on one golfing matches that they were playing, but they decided to go with boxing.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they made it death sports and stuff, but I mean, if he knocked a guy down, he couldn't get back up. And then. And then, just for fun, they're like, let's try to. Let's try to get this guy killed. And the one Nazi guard that was making a fortune off him said, look, I got a lot of money on you tonight. And they put him in there with a real boxer in the camp. And it goes like 35 rounds because they're going until somebody can't go no more. And he just wouldn't quit. And then, you know, just plug away. They just shoot him right there. And then the other. It's. It's brutal, but it's, you know, then I just don't know how you walk away going, I need to hit the computer real quick and talk about my lack of devito problem. How did you leave feeling that way? I don't know. Insensitive to. I got a lack of DeVito, didn't I?

[Ladonna Harvey]

Hey, honey, give me a Red Vine.

[John Holmberg]

Didn't they say Danny DeVito was in this? It's like six minutes.

[Ladonna Harvey]

I know. Total disappointment. Like, I want to watch these Nazis and Jews the whole time without the guy from Always Sunny in it. I need a little DeVito relief.

[Big Dick Toledo]

I didn't like the soundtrack.

[John Holmberg]

Right. Who did the score for this? He's an idiot.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Ugh.

[John Holmberg]

Fake blood.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Too much Neil Diamond.

[John Holmberg]

You're just not a. Yeah, you're just not a. You're just not an individual I care to know.

[Ladonna Harvey]

We should go home and get on the computer and, like, pan out. A thing about our DeVito disappointment. You know, I was thinking the same thing.

[John Holmberg]

When we get home, I'm going to get on there. I'm going to rotten tomato a thing. Totally.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Just people need to know that there's.

[John Holmberg]

Not a ton of devito. It's kind of false advertising. Just a ton of Nazis and Jews. And then DeVito's like.

[Ladonna Harvey]

And then, come on.

[John Holmberg]

Rocky Marciano has no lines.

[Brett]

Oh, what a travesty. It was me, actually, that wrote one of those. Then Brett's review would be like, how.

[John Holmberg]

In the world do you have a movie around Rocky Marciano?

[Brady]

What?

[John Holmberg]

And he don't got no lines. That's nothing to do with him, actually. No, no, no. He's in it He's a crucial. He's a. He's a. What you'd call the fulcrum of the story is where the pivot points are. No, Marciano, you don't get my 15 bucks.

[Brett]

Damn right.

[John Holmberg]

I go to the. I go to a manager, I complain. Hey, your Rocky Marciano movie sucks. It's about survivor of Auschwitz. No, it's about a Jew who's trying to get attention of a lady. And Rocky Masiano, put him in his place. That's what it's about.

[Big Dick Toledo]

And then there. I mean, there are people that, like, that are just. You. You consider that entertainment?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I wasn't entertained. Right.

[Big Dick Toledo]

But they don't get that.

[Brady]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

They went to the movie about Auschwitz and was like, I felt gross after.

[Big Dick Toledo]

That is not entertainment.

[John Holmberg]

I wasn't. I. I didn't feel good. We couldn't even go to dinner afterwards. I mean, how could I? But it's. It's. It's a. You know, it's not the greatest movie I've ever seen, but I would never, ever come on and go, you know? Yeah. It didn't seem realistic. Like the. And then in the end. Okay, like, he's got a. It does. Does the girl he's been trying to do this for, did she live? He doesn't even know if she made it through the camps. She had to change her name, obviously. Ran to America. Not sure if she's here. Not sure if she died in the camps. Not anything.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Married a German guy.

[John Holmberg]

It's the DeVito part. Yeah. So this is just a trailer.

[Brady]

I'll give you two days training. Why would you help me win? Win? Boychick, I'm just giving you a chance to lose with a little dignity.

[John Holmberg]

It's really good. Marcy Marciano beats the tar out of this guy.

[Brett]

Is that after Marciano?

[John Holmberg]

It's all kind of flashbacks, flash forwards and. Yeah, so. And it basically is all. The only reason this dude's doing this outside of Auschwitz is because that's what he knew at Auschwitz. And he's gotta. He's gotta be.

[Big Dick Toledo]

They. Cooper. His nose.

[John Holmberg]

He has no. He has to be famous to. For her to find him. That's the only way that, like, he. He's just. I just need to be in the papers. I gotta. I gotta be famous. So she knows I'm alive because he's. He. The only reason he lives, the only reason he survived the whole time is because the thought of being with her. Like, if she survives, I gotta be with her. So.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Oh, yeah, they love her.

[John Holmberg]

No. And when he's old. It's all busted up. So they didn't. They didn't. They didn't chew his nose up. See, this is what. You're one of those dip that's watching the movie for that. What a dumb thing to say. That is Bally Cooper's nose.

[Ladonna Harvey]

I hate bad prosthetics. Nazis 1, Jew 0. Not watching it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they did. They do make up for the fighting scenes. And as he aged. Was he. Was he beat up because that's how he looked? Yes. Did they make Ben Foster look a little bit more like him? Yeah. It's not called Coopering his nose, though. It's just giving him prosthetics to look like the guy. You insensitive mother.

[Big Dick Toledo]

76.

[Ladonna Harvey]

There's a reason 24% hated it. Cooper.

[John Holmberg]

Cooper nose.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Who did the makeup on this?

[Brady]

Ugh.

[Ladonna Harvey]

That's the worst thing that's ever happened to man.

[John Holmberg]

What?

[Ladonna Harvey]

The makeup.

[John Holmberg]

Not the Nazi Holocaust.

[Big Dick Toledo]

The Coopering.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Nothing worse. Nothing worse than bad makeup.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. The Holocaust.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Nah, it's just a movie. Kirby, let's go see that bab Marley again. I can understand the Jamaicans. Nonsense Yiddish that's going on.

[John Holmberg]

Did they Cooper his nose? You're one of them, Brady. You're one of the fire that.

[Ladonna Harvey]

You know, I would have liked this. They didn't cooper up and Jew his nose up. It's the reason I hated Maestro. Can't get past that.

[John Holmberg]

Anyway, it is not an uplifting film if you're looking for feel good smash for the weekend. No, but if you like to, you know, watch something that'll make your body ache for what the human experience is, it's. It's pretty remarkably good. And there's some sports in it for Brett, for Marciano. The Marc Marciano.

[Brett]

How long's he in it?

[John Holmberg]

It's talked about an awful lot. He's in it for, I don't know, good 15, 20 minutes.

[Brett]

I got 20 minutes of time to.

[John Holmberg]

Watch and then just turn it off because then. Then it starts bleeding into that whole Holocaust thing again.

[Brett]

All that Cooper knows stuff. I just. Let me see.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Ro.

[John Holmberg]

The Holocaust really bogs down the Marciano parts.

[Brett]

Gets in the way of the Marciano story.

[Big Dick Toledo]

What are you doing?

[John Holmberg]

Spinning your tires and all that Jew mud? I see how you guys are. Well, I came to the wrong place to have this discussion. I'll be over with Ted Simons at PBS having a discussion with a real human being.

[Big Dick Toledo]

That might have dropped down to 72.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Fred, stop reviewing it.

[Brady]

What?

[John Holmberg]

I open Multiple accounts no DeVito, no Marciano. I mean, this is garbage. Where's De Niro? If you're gonna have a boxing movie, where is he? He's the boo. Anyway, I'll pick a better class of friends to have these conversations with. You guys aren't good with art house films.

[Brett]

Jonathan just said these June Nose jokes really trigger John.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, I mean, come on. If you can't get past, you would think they.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Juno's the guy.

[John Holmberg]

Come on. Do you not force through the trees, jackasses? This movie's not about the makeup.

[Ladonna Harvey]

That doesn't happen when you punch.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Unbelievable.

[John Holmberg]

Stupid.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Oh, right. Like they were all naked.

[John Holmberg]

They were in the 40s.

[Ladonna Harvey]

No way. When I get home, I'm firing off a letter to the masses. Wasn't a big fan of that. DeVito's in the trailer. Long as he's in the movie, I'm gonna ask for my money back. Like a Jew.

[Big Dick Toledo]

Money. Gr.

[Brady]

Yep, that's all it is.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Levinson. Typical Barry Levinson. Typical. Typical. Slap together this garbage store and swipe cash from the people.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, I took it as Jesus. The. The Nazis were actually worse than I've given them credit for. But holding this kind of stuff, holding these stunts.

[Big Dick Toledo]

What?

[John Holmberg]

Just saying.

[Brett]

Enough Marciano. What do you end up.

[John Holmberg]

Well, you. I understand. Anyway.

[Ladonna Harvey]

Cooper is nose.

[John Holmberg]

Go get out in the hallway and go play with your blocks. Idiot. Put your helmet on. You're gonna hurt yourself. Let's get a wake up song. 585-9800 a good one and we'll scream it together it's 98 KUPD. Give us. Hey, it's not weird.

[Brady]

It's pretty cool, actually.

[John Holmberg]

No membership fees.

[Brady]

I have heard enough of this for you, pt.