02-03-26 - FULL SHOW - TUESDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 02-03-26 - FULL SHOW - TUESDAY
Date: February 3, 2026
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Overview

On this episode of "Holmberg's Morning Sickness," John Holmberg and the crew traverse their mix of irreverent humor, personal anecdotes, and pointed social commentary, covering everything from local Arizona traffic policies and suspicions about government distraction tactics, to cultural observations on aging, beauty, and relationships. In typical fashion, the show balances conspiratorial rants, earnest self-reflection, and outlandish comedy, sliding effortlessly from current events to wild tangents.

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Major Segments & Key Discussions

1. Arizona's Speed Camera Drama & Civic Mischief

[02:52–08:06]

• Holmberg recaps his "campaign" against traffic speed cameras, crediting his rants—and his show's audience—for Phoenix city officials shelving the red light camera program, possibly putting it to a public vote.
• Holmberg:

  "Any one of you mother****ers out there voting yes to have your tax dollars pay for cameras to fine us for more tax dollars is the dumbest person alive." (04:01)

• Recounts wild protest antics, like driving around with an 18-inch dildo visible to photo radar.
• Commentary on how such stunts targeted the city’s fear of sending pornographic material in the mail.

2. Erosion of Trust, Conspiracy, and Media Skepticism

[08:52–19:45]

• Holmberg addresses his growing disbelief in official narratives, referencing:
  • Epstein Files: Claims the recent release of files (~3 million pages) is being overrun by media distractions.
  • Minnesota $9B theft and suspicious "moral" pivot in politics.
  • Bizarre News Distractions: From repeat “butt-wiping scam” stories to absurd medical emergencies involving WWI artillery shells.
• Savannah Guthrie story (NBC anchor):
  • Holmberg posits the likely storyline of her mother’s kidnapping being pinned on an illegal immigrant, turning into a crafted border policy narrative for political gain.

  "None of this smells right... There's going to be people who are screaming and yelling about it, but would you put it past the side that's currently losing the media fight to say, we need to win? How do we do it? And they concoct this nonsense." (15:33)

3. Simulation/Media Manipulation & Personal Sanity

[17:06–30:17]

• The hosts joke about nothing in the news feeling real anymore, with Holmberg expressing frustration:

  "Nothing seems real to me anymore. And I hate it. I'm not celebrating this new mindset... I kind of liked the old days when I could get up and joke around about stuff." (26:17)

• Lighthearted paranoia about turning into "one of those red conspiracy theory guys," but with self-awareness and comic relief referencing Alex Jones and The Truman Show.

4. Listeners & Interactivity – Emails, Social Commentary

[53:13–96:06, scattered]

• Fielding listener emails, including challenges of modern dating, age and beauty standards, and reactions to having "skincare routines" as men.
• Debate on women’s efforts to look younger:
  • Observes the irony of women resenting older men dating younger women, while simultaneously spending billions on anti-aging products to appear younger themselves.

  "Women spend billions and billions and billions of dollars annually to try not to age, to look like exactly what they think a man is a pervert for liking." (70:08)

• Multiple humorous and pointed exchanges with a listener, Rachel, who is self-conscious about her age and beauty, sparking a broader discussion about gender, expectations, and authenticity.

5. Pop Culture, AI, and Outrageous News Stories

[115:23–123:16, etc.]

• Briefly covers viral AI-generated "conjoined twin models" and the spread of deepfakes online, highlighting the challenge of distinguishing reality from fiction.
• Playful critique of the rise of AI content in entertainment and social media; demonstrates with the Gracie Higgins/AI model Instagram rabbit hole.

6. Relationship Dilemmas – ‘What Would Brady Do?’

[132:19–150:44]

• Brady dispenses advice on listener questions about health, relationships, and confidence, including:
  • 43-year-old listener’s question about testosterone/ED pills vs. weight loss for sexual health.
  • Navigating a wife’s suggestion to invite a third person (woman) into the bedroom and the potential pitfalls or traps.

  “If your wife asks you to go out and get a chick at the house, you're going to have to go down to like a Lo's Chicken and Waffles. Get one of them big girls.” (149:19)

  • Building confidence as a "big man" and not letting body image impede self-esteem or activity.

7. Entertainment & Pop Culture Wrap-up

[154:01–174:58]

• Hot Releases segment: New music from Marilyn Manson, Bush, Sevendust, Kid Rock, AI-generated songs.
• Quick takes on Super Bowl halftime shows, bad and good, and playful speculation on Bernie Sanders’ sex machine fascination—satirical, not serious.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On Distrust in News & Society:

  "When they call you crazy, it's usually because you did something right." (17:37, Holmberg)

• On Official Narratives:

  "When you're right, you're not a conspiracy theorist anymore. When you're right, this one stinks." (18:08, Holmberg)

• Listener Truth Bomb (on female beauty standards):

  "You set that standard up yourself and then get mad at us for going, oh, okay, well, there's the real ones, and then there's you." (76:50, Holmberg to Rachel)

• Comedy/Outrage Blend:
  On a viral story about Trump possibly pooping his pants at a press event:

  "It's clear that something happened because the people behind him... the one lady's fists like she clenches her fists like it's just. You know. Cuz when you have an accidental ****, it usually is the worst smelling kind..." ([62:09])

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Noteworthy Timestamps

• [02:52–08:06]: Traffic camera rants, protest stunts recap
• [09:47–16:07]: Epstein files, Guthrie’s mother “kidnapping,” narrative manipulation
• [17:06–30:17]: Sanity rants, simulation talk, Alex Jones references
• [70:08–85:25]: Gender/age/beauty standards debate with listener Rachel
• [132:19–150:44]: ‘What Would Brady Do’ relationship dilemma segment
• [154:01–174:58]: Entertainment, music releases, satire on political figures’ private lives

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Tone & Style

The episode leans heavily into sardonic wit, delighting in absurdities and inviting audience participation. Holmberg’s tone shifts from exasperated and confessional to delightfully conspiratorial, always with a strong undercurrent of humor and self-depreciation. Brady and Bret play excellent foils, reigning in or egging on the chaos as needed, while Toledo offers technical backup and the occasional punchline. The social and cultural criticism is intermixed with running jokes, playful crudeness, and a willingness to mock their own overthinking.

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Final Thoughts

A quintessential installment of "Holmberg’s Morning Sickness": unfiltered banter, insightful (if sometimes cynical) takes on current events, and a relentless push to entertain while questioning the authenticity of just about everything in modern life. The hosts’ chemistry and willingness to broadcast their doubts, flaws, and eccentricities make both the laughter and commentary lands with authenticity—however suspicious they insist the world has become.

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Transcript

[A]

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Boost tokens restrictions apply including any token expiration and max wager amount. See [e-mail] gambling problem. Call 18 next step or text next step to 53342. Still streaming Homberg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Tuesday. It is 5:45. This is the Morning Sickness podcast. Yeah, start calling it that. Screw it. Radio's gone. Yeah, welcome to the podcast. Let's just shift focus. What do you say? Might as well. Yeah, I do it. Hi, my name's John, host of the podcast. There's Brady, my Co host of the podcast. There's Brett, the other co host of the POD cast. And then Toledo does something around here. I think he's still on radio. We're just having a. I'm just bitching before the show starts as per usual. But yeah, another you know what I. This is crazy. I'm in springhead. Well that sounds bad. I'm in spring mode because the weather is so great. I'm having all my March stuff happen in early February. I'm starting to breathe weird. I get my check all night. Kicking the bg. Yeah.

[B]

Last couple of days, every time I.

[A]

Sit down and get comfortable my chest goes hey, let's make this miserable. And yeah, I'm in the middle of March. You know, I've been goose in my.

[B]

Nasals with the spray.

[A]

Don't say that. That sounded. I don't want to even google search that because I have a feeling it'll come up on one of Brett's videos. I'm sure it will later. I want to start something like tend to do praising myself. I don't know if you guys heard. The other day I went on a, about a 45 minute rant about the state of Arizona, city of Phoenix bringing back the speeding cameras and I, I feel single handedly responsible. Back in the the aughts and early the 21st century of stopping the speed cameras here when this was back when this was a radio show, I stopped it completely and currently went out again and said if they waited 16 years, which is a full generation of they don't know, let's get them again. And they forgot I was still here doing this podcast. Oh yeah. And I went off and you know what has happened? City of Phoenix has shelved the camera program. Good on them also very possibly going to put it up for a vote now. Right now they're shelving the red light camera program. The speeding camera program can't be far behind that because that is a company that they have an agreement with. But they may, they may let us vote on it. And any one of you mother out there voting yes to have your tax dollars pay for cameras to fine us for more tax dollars is the dumbest person alive.

[B]

Basically go F yourself.

[A]

Go F yourself. So everybody votes no and just drive a little nicer. It's up to us. You don't need a parent taking pictures of your naughtiness. Start behaving a little bit better. You're speeding. Cool it. When nobody else is speeding, you're causing trouble.

[B]

Speeding is one thing, but we, we are above average on running red lights.

[A]

Okay, fine. Driving like an asshole is different than speeding. If everybody's going 80 and you're going 95, you're an asshole. If everybody's going 95 and you're going 120, you're an asshole. There was a guy in McDowell the other day, I was driving and I was gonna change lanes and he. A bullet just flew by me. He had to be going 90, 95. And I'm like, we're all going 55. That's good. This is a 40 mile an hour zone. We're all cruising along a little heavier than we're supposed to. Everybody said, this just shot by me. I'm like, I almost switched lanes and just obliterated that dude. It was a little car. You're driving like an asshole. The camera's not gonna stop people like that. And they're the ones we need to stop. But I did stop it. Once again, you're welcome. Because they went back and said, ah, that asshole's still over there. And that everybody remember that radio show that got, ah, he's doing it again and they don't want to get caught with my plan. If you guys list. And also thanks to you guys for being degenerate enough that the city goes, oh, the KP audience, they'll do that dick thing he was talking about. And then we got to worry about sending pornographic material through the mail. Like that asshole. So kudos to all of you for having the reputation of being just off kilter enough that you might drive around with an 18 inch dildo. Like I said, it scares them because they can lose their city bond for sending pornographic material through the mail. It scares them to death. I watched them get scared when I had my big 18 inch dildo picture on my photo radar right there at that courthouse. It scared everybody. It was awesome. And thanks to my neighbor back in the day for doing that. I forgot his name. Bald guy, which came in real handy. God, I forgot his name. My neighbor from way back in 2008, house.

[B]

Huh?

[A]

I don't remember him.

[B]

I can't.

[A]

Heck of a nice guy. We weren't great friends, but, you know, clearly good enough. Good enough for me to go, hey, you want to do me a favor? And he goes. And it was basically one of those things where he's like, what? Said, look, I got caught driving around. I did it on purpose. I was 18 inch dildo, big fainy, big fanny, huge. I want to see it. He goes, what? Like, yeah, put your kids inside. They were like three. Put your Kids inside, come here. I showed it to him, and he said, I got pictures. And he goes, you're driving around with that in your face. I'm like, yeah. I said, I'm trying to stop speed cameras. This is before you were gay, too. Yeah, I know. He didn't even know I was. He didn't know I was pseudo gay yet. I wasn't pretending to be gay yet to get away with, like, saying gay stuff.

[B]

He's like, that's when I saw. On the side of the avalanche the.

[A]

Other day, I saw a guy driving around with that stuck to the tornado. Hey, that's my buddy. That was us. He said, what are you doing again? I said, like, I'm like Don Quixote, except for with a huge, veiny wiener. And I'm driving around and I'm stopping this stuff and I need your help. And he looked at me like I was insane. And I started to get that vibe. Like, I have barked up the wrong tree. And I'll never forget his next words. He goes, it's just too good not to do. And I'm like, let's go. And he got his kid, me and him in the car, and I just milled around in the lobby, acting like I didn't know him while I listened to what he said. And then I went up and I said, you're not allowed to send pornographic. So they're not allowed to send pornographic material through the mail. It was awesome. Watching them melt down was awesome. So. And we also had that guy, my friend Scott was with us, and he had a legal brain. He knew every word of every commercial code there was, and he was just barking at him. Oh, it was phenomenal. So I did it again. I'm gonna take credit for it again if we end up voting on that. They should call it the Holmberg Bill. A, for my ego. B, well, no, that's it. That's really all it is. That's all I care about. And it's good promotion for this podcast. We're. You're asking yourself, why does he keep saying that? That's because I've watched radio executives destroy this business into a point where it's just time to shift. I don't want to be part of them anymore. We're now a podcast. We just happen to do a radio show, too. It'll be good. The radio still does. Well, our show does, but man, oh, man. Tick tock, tick tock with these knobs running it. I don't care. I'm not singling out. There's A couple of good ones, and there's a couple of doofuses and they don't know which ones are what. And so that can't get caught for being insubordinate if I don't name names. But there's a couple of them that are like head trauma dumb and they think I don't know what's going on. I get. I got people. I got two things I want to talk about before I get into a theory of mine. And the reason I've been a bit more conspiratorial lately is because I. Like I've been saying lately, I'm not sure I believe anything isn't fake anym. Not that it isn't happening, but it's happening because it's being forced to happen. Nothing's happening organically. I don't believe truly that all of this stuff has happened organically. The Epstein files came out a couple days ago and it's a treasure trove of pornography.

[B]

Did you say three million pages?

[A]

Three million pages. A treasure trove of his pornography. This is what should have been first, why were we going through emails where Frank Caliendo's show was being sold in West Palm before? We're like, oh, yeah, also, this is what you release. So it was all this distraction nonsense and everything else. I don't believe the Epstein files are being handled with anything legitimately. I think certain aspects of this whole ICE thing are choreographed to distract from that. Plus the $9 billion theft that happened in Minnesota. And then a certain, certain, like, coincidence that Minnesota is the place that had a $9 billion shortfall in theft that also happens to be now the. The home of righteous morality and everything's beautiful there suddenly. And everybody's forgotten about the other. That seems fake. All of it seems fake to me. And. And before I get into anything where you're like, oh, you're crazy, conspiratorial guy, because I got another one that I think may be tied to this. I remind you, I gotta find the thing just so I get it just right. Hold on, hold on. Another guy for the fourth time in Louisiana, has been calling nurses, pretending to be mentally so he gets his ass wiped. We have a second Manchaka.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

So I'm starting as I get a little older to see, like, wait a minute. That's already been a story. They're just changing the names. I think they circulate the same things with, especially now with AI that they can just go, that story has legs. We've got something going on. People will be described They've got fourth time. And his name is awesome Routledge Dais iv, which tells me he's been raised very low. I am Routledge Deus iv, and I refuse to wipe my own bottom. It is beneath me, literally. So I'm going to pretend to be ment handicapped and hire people to do such a thing. Get the feces from my bottom creases. And so he did that, and he's now in jail for the fourth time. So I'm like, all right, that's a distraction. There's another story about a little girl who got kissed by someone with herpes and her eye fell out. Yes. It's a real story. Her eyeball fell out because of that.

[B]

Did get treatment in time.

[A]

Here's the other thing. The simulation is not working. No. She went there, and they're like, what happened? A little eye infection. And then they spun it back to, like, aunt Carol has herpes and gave her a little on the face, and it burned her eye out.

[B]

It's like the moil who kissed the kid.

[A]

Yes. Well, because they have to eat the blood of the. And he kissed a wounded. That whole baby hurt. It's gross to suck the blood out of the foreskin because that's part of the religion.

[B]

What?

[A]

I'm switching legends. Here's the other thing. There's no way this is real. They evacuated a hospital in England because a man stuffed a World War I artillery shell up his ass. This is the world we live in.

[B]

They're gonna sue him.

[A]

Yeah. So guy got. We now have too many stories of things in people's asses on a constant basis. That makes me think that the distraction. Flags are flying everywhere. Now we've got Savannah. Here's where I go crazy. Savannah Guthrie's mom down there in Tucson with what is now one of the weirder things ever.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Suddenly, here in Tucson, one of the members of the liberal left media has her mother stolen, and they're now saying it's a crime and it is a kidnapping and possibly a trafficking situation.

[B]

Huh.

[A]

Wouldn't that be convenient to have the left media have to deal with an illegal immigrant stealing one of her family members, and suddenly ICE saves the day in a border state.

[B]

I think it's someone in the office with her because now she can't cover the Olympics. The other person gets to go.

[A]

It's going to get attention. I don't know if they'll solve this thing, but I guarantee you the perpetrator is going to be an illegal alien with a history of crimes who was let go under the Biden administration. And we'll all fight about it. No matter what happens here. None of this smells right. None of it. Everything seems like vanilla ice. Clumsy choreography. I feel like I'm watching the ice ice baby video. I'm like, this is white dancing. There's a lot of white people dancing, and it's not normal. Just guarantee it. When the smole stink comes off of this, I almost promise you that it will be an illegal immigrant with a track record that stole Savannah Guthrie's mother. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. But, man, does this stink to high heaven to me. And the timing couldn't be. You know, you kind of go to the today show. You tap into a name that we all sort of recognize whether we watch or not. I had no idea who it was, right. Until they kept saying, oh, today's show. I'm like, hey, I remember last time.

[B]

I watched, like, oh, that's Savannah.

[A]

She's been around for a long time. I know.

[B]

I recognize. Yeah.

[A]

She's done a lot of stuff she does. I watch a lot of crime drama, the dateline stuff, and she'll pop up.

[B]

I think it's a good now, you know. You know, to call your mom today if she's still alive.

[A]

That's a great idea. Yeah. But I'm telling you, man, the. This is such a. To me, it's just like, of course. Of course they need something else. And I don't think that they're. I don't.

[B]

That's a great point. It's not. Not far fetched.

[A]

No. And there's the problem. Right. There's the thing that when I say it, you're like, well, there's going to be people who are screaming and yelling about it, but would you put it past the side that's currently losing the media fight to say, we need to win? How do we do it? And they concoct this nonsense. Because there's no doubt in my mind that there is a distraction process going on, not only for the Epstein files, but for the theft in Minnesota and all that. I don't want to get political about it because I don't believe either side's telling us any. I don't know how you side with either group. I hate them both.

[B]

Both sides have an agenda.

[A]

Yeah. And now this one's like, well, it's the midterms. We got to win here. There'll either be a hero that comes out of this, or the bad guy is going to be a perfect representation going, this is why we need Ice. Perfect. Meanwhile, people are like, Brady brought up this morning off the air that in the Olympics, they're changing the name of the. The ice facility, the Ice House to Winter House. Because we can't even hear the word ice now without thinking, well, that's not. Because you can't have it in your glass anymore. Because people lose their mind in Milan. Yeah.

[B]

And it's cold. What do they care? Ice House. They don't carry.

[A]

I'm like, oh, yeah.

[B]

Talk about making a spotlight on something that looks silly.

[A]

Could have just left it alone.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We know the difference between ice in a glass, ice on the ground for hockey, and the ice.

[B]

What are they gonna do on that?

[A]

Yeah. So what do I do when I go to a bar now? I don't want the ice in my drink. Cold cubes, okay? You call them cold cubes. The melties. I call them the melties now. Nothing feels real to me.

[B]

Freezy squares.

[A]

And you know what's worse about it? Like I said when I say this, people are kind of like, oh, no, there's like, maybe something to that. And you can dismiss it immediately. I'm fine with that. I want to dismiss it immediately, but it isn't far fetched. Brady said that. It's not far fetched. It's not a theory that popped in my mind. And I'm no longer questioning when I go, hey, this feels like bull. I no longer question that. I don't. I don't care if you think I'm crazy.

[B]

Shut your mouth. You'll be. You'll be in a straight jacket.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. They're gonna start calling me crazy. Know what I know now? After a few years of being alive on this planet, when they call you crazy, it's usually because you did something right.

[B]

Alex Jones. I'm sorry.

[A]

Because, well, he went absolutely nuts. I'm probably. That dude went nuts.

[B]

You're starting to be a little more.

[A]

Forgiving on that, aren't you? I'm forgiving of his first ideas, but when he started with the gay frogs, he needed to. He needed to cushion stuff a little easier. He came out of the gates a little hot.

[B]

I think it was too much weed.

[A]

I think it's the thing when you. I don't know if it's an age thing. I'm not tinfoil hat. I don't want to be right. I just think I might be. Everything feels like a look over here. Everything. And it's clumsy. It's just flat clumsy. I don't think. I don't think Savannah Guthrie's in on it. I honestly believe that they'll use us as pawns every once in a while to get their message across. And there's going to be. I've been right about a lot of this stuff. The Ryan Lochte thing stunk immediately. Everybody called me nuts. Turned out I was exactly right. Jussie Smollett thing. I remember turning the mics off that morning, looking at you going, this is crap. But I don't want to go down the road and be wrong that a gay black guy didn't get beat up in the middle of the night. But. And that morning, we hashed out like, no, none of this is real. And it made too much sense that it wasn't real, that people didn't get that mad. And then, luckily for us, because we'd have been kicked right off the air for not believing it right away, it was like, yeah, a couple days later, people started questioning it a little bit. For a while, he was a hero. If you remember, we've smelled this out a few times, more than a few times. And it isn't conspiratorial. When you're right, you're not a conspiracy theorist anymore. When you're right, this one stinks. And I feel terrible for Savannah and her mom and all this other stuff, but I guarantee you, no matter how this. And this might have been an organic kidnapping, but what they're going to focus on in the end is illegal immigrant did this. It's a sex trafficking problem. That's a human trafficking issue. And this guy was an illegal alien, and he's got a rap sheet for.

[B]

How'D you get a payday? Now, if I'm wrong, Savannah Guthrie's grandmother.

[A]

If I'm wrong, first of all, I'm not looking for you guys to go, you were wrong. I'll gladly and happily say, thank God I was wrong, because it'll. It'll give me a little bit more hope and grace that we're not constantly being fooled. But if I'm right, I'm gonna grandstand on it and really make myself look good, because that's what everybody else is doing, so why shouldn't I? But I want to be wrong. So before you guys start firing off, cool. Great, because that means I was wrong. And things aren't as goofy as I think they are. But it just stinks to high heaven that this is yet another thing that we're gonna sit and stare at and go, that ain't right. Meanwhile, people are shoving artillery shells up their asses and going to the hospital he's getting sued. And I'd be the one that gets called crazy. Dudes are faking being retarded to get their asses wiped. And it ain't the first time we've seen this, everybody.

[B]

That's what's weird. It wasn't that long ago. It was like six months ago. Someone was messing around with the again immortal.

[A]

Oh, more. Yeah. People are finding World War I, they have a problem with that in Europe, people forget that's how what artillery shells up the ass? Well, no, like Princess Diana fought. She lost that battle. She fought vehemently against hidden landmines throughout Europe through World War I and 2 and all their wars and stuff.

[B]

Still out.

[A]

Heather Mills lost her leg. Paul McCartney's wife lost her leg, if I remember right, from stomping around on one of those things and blew up under the ground years and years. You can't go through like fields in England without like there might be a couple active minds.

[B]

I think she lost her Heather Mills like in the Mozambique or that kind of.

[A]

Either way, you find an artillery shell in Europe. You're pretty well versed in the idea of going probably this could be active. No, dude shoved in at his ass and it's not coming out. And he went to the hospital. Something's in my ass to clear it out. He cleared the whole hospital. It's like that might be an active. At least it wasn't active. Well, it was a little active, but not the way it was intact.

[B]

It's a dud.

[A]

It's a dud. We've done all the research we can and luckily the artillery shell you've stuffed in your ass isn't an explosive anymore. Shell wasn't active. Yeah, his ass definitely was. Thank gosh. Now rip that thing up my ass. Like people are losing their mind on a daily basis and we're busy calling people like me crazy for saying does this smell funny? Just a matter of time before the. Oh, Merchogos bananas. You know there are gay frogs. This guy says who the hell would sex traffic an 84 year old woman. Did Zach Ray go cougar hunting and stealing? It might have been Zach Ray. Zach might have gone after that 84 year old broad. I don't know. It just all feels funny.

[B]

Assume they went to the house and everything was there. Like her purse and identification. She's just missing.

[A]

Yeah, this guy that just emailed me just opened my brain too. I have to look at this and I'm gonna. James McCarthy. I just read your email. I remember the Tyson Evander Holyfield fight. Evander's ears still not the same. It looks funny. He bit of a chunk off James McCarthy says Trump's ear. Look at it. There's no damage. He lost a lobe. Never gets talked about. Nothing's wrong with his ear. I haven't looked but if that's true and I watched Evander Holyfield's ear get half chunked and then when it grew back it's got this little half moon cut out on top.

[B]

He couldn't afford the plastic surgery.

[A]

I don't know that he ever tried. He might have fixed it since but for a long time he had that weird little. He'd get bit off and spit out right in front of all of us. And he's forever had the markings of that. I haven't looked at Trump's ear since the thing. Don't start that with me. That one can't be because I do. But again they're take. They'll take us.

[B]

And he's not wearing his wedding ring.

[A]

Trump didn't wear his wedding ring.

[B]

No.

[A]

I don't think he swells up.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Anyway, I don't want to go too crazy, but I think I might be going a little crazy and I think I might be right a lot. This one says Scott Ames is right. He goes, they haven't done a silver alert for this lady in Tucson. That's a good point. They do it to their whole state. I can't remember. Okay. Oh yeah.

[B]

It's an hour and a half in Westgate.

[A]

So they already know where she is. Just a matter of time before they reveal all that they She's Mexico with that goddamn turquoise alert at four in the morning that time. But you're right, Scott. They haven't blown us up with that yet. Oh, I've gone bananas, everybody. Holmberg's morning sickness. Everybody loves the Toyota Tacoma. This is Larry McFeely and even our very own Tripp Reeb just picked up a new Toyota Tacoma for his towing needs. Of course, he loves the fact that it provides over 450 foot pounds of torque, but you should have heard him raving about the giant 14 inch touchscreen and his favorite, the removable JBL Bluetooth speaker you can pull right off of the dash to blast the 98k upd app. He's a Tacoma lover now, but how could he not be be? It's time for you to take a look at the new Toyota Tacoma. Visit your Valley Toyota dealers or valleytoyotadeealers.com Toyota let's go places. Fanduel is taking care of you guys because they're turning on playoff mode. All customers get a profit boost pack every NFL playoff game day. Each game day during the championship round, you'll find a pick loaded with multiple profit boosts waiting for you in the app. So visit fanduel.com kupd and grab your profit boost pack every NFL playoff game day. 21/in present in Arizona. Opt in required bonus issues non withdrawable profit boost tokens. Restrictions apply including any token expiration and max wager amount. See terms of sportsbook.fanduel.com gambling problem. Call 1-800-next-step or text next step to 533-42-HOMBERG's morning sickness. And it's not.

[B]

I wonder if they put it out just because it's too far. That we figure out, oh, she's kidnapped. No need to do the Amber alert.

[A]

The Silver alert. Amber alert. Yeah. No, I mean, but wouldn't you. Anyway, the news covers the silver alerts. Plus, like, locally, all the news will talk about it. So it's not like, yeah, we already talked about it on tv. Not everybody's paying attention. So on the billboards it should say silver Alert. Looking for. They don't know what they're. They got.

[B]

They know what they're looking for.

[A]

It's hard not to just immediately go, that seems like bull. And then my old me used to go, probably not. And my new me is like, no, trust your gut. You gotta trust your gut. I gotta. I'm sorry. I went right into Silk Sonic. But the. Yeah, you can't. Nothing seems real to me anymore. And I hate it. I'm not. I'm not celebrating this new mindset. I hate it. And it's both sides. Of course, it's not just, you know, this would. This is completely PR on the other side going, watch this. We'll make it so they're the heroes. We'll make it so our point gets made with one of theirs. It's brutal. And I just don't buy anything anymore. And I hate my new brain. I kind of liked the old days when I could get up and joke around about stuff. And then occasionally someone would stuff an artillery shell in their ass. And it was. And it was mind blowing. I'm not even shocked to read it anymore.

[B]

We got another one.

[A]

I wake up in the morning like, oh, somebody's in the hospital for shoving something that doesn't go in their ass. In their ass. And that's been going on for a long time. People been stuffing things in their butts for a Long time. But it seems to be getting strangely large and dangerous. I blame the interwebs. I blame them all. But yeah, I don't want to go crazy, but I think I already have. I might be the Jose Canseco of. Of this world, apparently. Gabriel said they did do a silver alert yesterday. Oh, did they? Okay, it was on TV and everything, so. All right. Thanks, Gabriel. And this is. Don't forget, John, we're sending people to the moon this week. Well, no, this morning. They scrubbed that. It's not happening anymore. We were going to go around the moon once, but they can't. Why? We were there before. No difference is to make sure. Maybe weather. Oh, here you go again. I don't know. I don't know that I believe that at all anymore. This one says, john, welcome. Everything we know as a society is based off of lies and bs. Our nation has been run by Luciferian pedophiliac cults. Was Doug Hopkins in the Epstein files? No, he's not. He's not, as far as I know. But my friend Frank Galiendo was. Am I in them? So much mundane nonsense.

[B]

And Bill and Hillary testify today, right?

[A]

I don't know that I ever want to say the words Luciferian pedophiliacs, but I'm gonna go with you for a little while. It doesn't bother me. This one says, seems like that big Jew nose is finally coming through and sniffing out the truth. That's right. The big Jew knows is finding its way to truth. Yeah, I'm not crazy yet, but I am. This is. Say that there's a phrase for it going crazy. I think I'm in the throes of that, John. You should have taken the blue pill, not the red. Life is better and harder on the blue one. Yeah, Brady's. Brady was right the whole time. Having no idea how things work and just living his life looking for this next meal. Goddamn guy's a genius. That's all there is. Brady, you're the smartest one in the room. By not caring this much. There he goes. Look at him. Artillery shell in your bottom. Let's go to raising canes. Meanwhile, I'm over there going, I can't believe this. Did you see this? My brain won't let me do it. I can't let go. It' I'm in limerence with crazy anyway. What are you gonna do? It's hard to get back to normal brains. It's hard to get back to being a normal person when your brain starts and it isn't because I was influenced by anything. I just started to not question. That doesn't seem right, because I think it's because my history of thinking, hey, that. That doesn't seem right has been right so often.

[B]

But come on, you can get back.

[A]

Into the film, you know, to your.

[B]

Way, more or less, you do.

[A]

Brady, I could never be, no offense, that much of a worthless lump of dough. Hopefully you're not offended by that.

[B]

No, no.

[A]

I just. I want you to be happy, that's all. He'll get through it. Don't worry about it. Nothing bothers him. People are saying to quit hanging out with Nash. They think it's Nash. Nash isn't Nash. All Nash talks about is 9, 11, and the moon and occasionally cholesterol. He goes nuts on cholesterol. He thinks that. And he's got some stuff that I listen to, but he's not convinced me of anything yet. In fact, he's the one I'm like, nope. I question him, too. I enjoy listening to him. I like when he starts talking. But Nash is. You know, Nash is going. He's gone off the deep end on stuff that everybody's already done. He's not looking at new stuff yet. Although the cholesterol stuff is interesting. And salt. He's big on that. What's that one? They try to keep you from doing things that your body actually needs and warn you that it's dangerous, like high cholesterol. Your body needs cholesterol. So then it's just a way to sell more pills. And.

[B]

Pill.

[A]

Yeah, there's.

[B]

Document.

[A]

There's. Yeah, there's. Oh, there's tons of.

[B]

And.

[A]

And it's not wrong. But again, my argument is we live longer than we ever have, so there's some truth to the idea of keeping longevity alive and keeping us sick the entire time, at least a little bit. But that's our fault.

[B]

Yeah. What is the argument on the. What is the advancement in medicine?

[A]

I'll tell you this. It's 100 our fault, because we will take convenience over the hard facts of, I can fix this myself, but I don't need to. Ozempic, high blood pressure, diabetes medicines, all that stuff. We could fix that. But a doctor says, why work so hard? Here's some pills you'll have to be on forever, and you don't have to do anything. And people are like, option B, please. That's awesome. Because if you really were like, hey, your blood pressure is crazy high, and you need to drop that. And the only way to do that is to. To, like, get in great shape. People are. I'm not doing that.

[B]

We need more doctors, more nurses.

[A]

That's right, because you're getting rid of the doctors then. It's like you said, convenience trumps everything, always. And that's where AI is going to come kick our asses, because it's going to make everything awesome. And we're like, I don't have to bite my ass anymore. People are doing that already. So I don't want to go nuts with everything, but just, you know, antenna up. I got a weird vibe on this one. Not that the kidnapping is fake, but how they're going to handle it when it's over. Do yourself a favor and watch the Pat Tillman documentary that came out years ago about how his family had to fight to find out what happened because they got lied to by the government like 8 or 9 times. Sat in front of everybody, General, Admiral, all the highest levels of the military, the four bigs, the Secretary of Defense and another guy in the Defense Department. As they all sat in front of the Tillman family and said their emails were down. The day the message came through, every one of them in different locations, all of their Internet and emails were down. So they had no possible way of getting those emails from the Department of Defense saying, don't talk about this. And they did. And then Rumsfeld went over to Pat Tillman's dad and said, I'm sorry. We did our best. And this was Harry Waxman and Donald Rumsfeld, opposite ends of the spectrum politically hated each other, shaking hands, going, I'm in on this plan. We can't let these people know what actually happened to him. And he walked over to Pat Tillman's dad and said, did all we could put his hand up. Untilman's dad just goes, you right to Donald Rumsfeld in the middle of the documentary. And it is powerful. It's awesome. And that's when you realized, oh, they're all in it together. And they're all gonna do whatever it is to protect their own ass. And we need to watch out, because Pat Tillman was being sold to us. And the Tillman family's the one that said, they tried to sell you a war with our son's head, man. Remember? It was bad. It was really bad. And there are emails that say, from Rumsfeld over to these guys, hey, this is good for us. Like it is.

[B]

It's rally charge.

[A]

Yeah, it was. It was. This is going to sell this. The people will buy this. Now we've got a hero. We've got an Audie Murphy. We've got a big boy, so keep.

[B]

The money coming in for the defense.

[A]

And I remember sitting in the theater watching that one. Remember Camel View? That used to show all the documentaries and stuff. Now it's stake 44. It's better than it was before. I'm glad it's stake 44. Trust me. Go in there, watch those documentaries. And I watch that one, and I'm like, man, this is just overblown nonsense. They're. They're trying to. They're doing the same thing. They're trying to sell us that it was all they were.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Tillman's mom's a hero. She's an amazing human being. The family, the wife, all of them went through all that redacted stuff and found everything they needed to find and then just hung them. They hung them and managed to go into a courtroom going, we got you. And they all just lied, looked at him and said, nothing we can do. We're in charge of the investigation. Bye. It was awesome.

[B]

And did it change things? Maybe a little. I don't know.

[A]

People deep down know that the story wasn't real and it didn't help them, but it got brushed away because there was never, like, any perjury with nothing. Ignore, ignore, ignore, ignore it. It'll go away. People will get distracted by a guy with an artillery shell in his ass enough that we'll be like, yeah, that's what I missed that. I missed that. I miss being walking behind Brady. Back when we were a radio show. Back when radio was here. We were on the radio. Remember that? Now we gotta do this podcast, the Golden Days. The. Yeah, they call that the Halcyon Days. We're in the Halcyon Days. Back when our brains didn't question things. I hate it. And just for all you people are like, remember, you're talking about. That's me and a Guthrie thing. Turned out you were wrong. I'm going to just email back, thank God I was wrong. Because I'm also a human being that can admit that and walk away and go, it's okay that you're wrong sometimes. Which is another thing we can't do anymore. So I'll get the. I'll get the big mouths eventually if it doesn't. And I'm rooting for it. I'm rooting to be wrong. It'll give me a little bit of hope. It'll make it so if I'm right about this, I'll be like, oh, no, now I'm gonna do this. With everything. If I'm wrong, it'd be like, see, John, you were wrong. You gotta pull back a little bit. I'm rooting to be wrong. I'm just saying it doesn't smell good.

[B]

Witnesses saw two men and MAGA hats.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Don't do that. And then maybe. You know what? There could be a thing.

[B]

I can't do that one anymore. That's already been.

[A]

I don't know. But that. So is Paul Machaka getting his ass wiped by nannies. And they're doing that again. And the riots in Minnesota aren't new. We've seen that a couple times. It worked five years ago. They went back to it. It's like when the Diamondbacks re signed Randy Johnson. It's like, what are you doing? The glory days. He's this. You can't do this twice. You're right, though. I wonder if the left's gonna try to get ahead of the right and go, we need to. We need to make the criminal and the Guthrie case two right wingers that hate NBC and they got. And they found out it was NBC. Savannah Guthrie on tv and they kidnapped. That wouldn't surprise me. God damn it. It's. There's a. I don't know what's going on around here, but I'm feeling pain. Alex Jones will be right back after this. She got kidnapped on her way to Subway and everything else. Go right down the same two in the morning. It could happen. It's 12 degrees. We don't know what's going on. Oh, no. I can't believe it. It's happening. But I don't want it. I don't want to know. It's happening to me. It's. It's happening to me right in front of you. I'll eat your ass. See, it's in my head. We just offer our children up to the system with the fluoride, the water.

[B]

And the GMO hurting them.

[A]

And we let fat perverts grab him at the airport to train them for the pedophile government. He's right. I don't want to be him, but I'm becoming him. I'm gonna be all red soon. I'm gonna be br like they all get. Oh, no. I'm gonna be one of those red people running around telling everybody that have gone crazy but just months away from getting on Rogan. Yeah, it would be. Oh, that's true. It'll be great for the podcast when I share that. Even better. I'll just be sitting. John's all red and he got fat overnight.

[B]

Where are the men in this country?

[A]

Where are the men in this world? What the hell have we become? Good.

[B]

Rogan will say to you. I remember coming on your radio program.

[A]

That's weird. I mean, wow. Weird. I'm like, yeah, I know, Joe. It's gone nuts. You used to do impressions. Yeah, I don't do that anymore. Joe days are over. I've gone crazy. I've turned bright red. I put on about 85 pounds.

[B]

This is my son. That's a frog.

[A]

The frog is my gay son. The government turned my son into a frog. It's the reverse. He was a prince, and now he's a frog. They abducted him. They brought him back in my yard, threw him in my beautiful pond. And now I said back there, I said, that's my boy. Yep, it's a matter of time. Next time you see me out, I'll be at you fest in September. I'm like, holberg's all bright red. Like, what happened to him? Well, he turned bright red. He's nuts now.

[B]

What's with the foil hat?

[A]

Yeah, you can't be outside the chemtrails in the Crest. If you use Crest, your teeth are gonna emit signals. I can hear everywhere. Just the good. He put on, like, £90 in a day, and he went nuts. I'm worried about me. Worried about me. But I'm doing that. Like, the TV's on and Savannah Guthrie's mother in Tucson. I'm like, that's terrible. And then my brain goes, terrible. It's bull. Yeah, brain. You might be right. Why do you say that? Brain? Then brain's like, you don't think they're gonna use this as an immigration thing soon? Like, oh, it's Tucson. You're. Oh, mother left wing media. Then my brain's like, go look in the mirror. Like, all right. You recognize that guy? Who. Where am I? Who's the red dude? That's you. I don't know why all these conspiracy people start turning bright red because their blood pressures through the roof.

[B]

You look like the dude from Fallout.

[A]

Yeah, just turn it. Yeah, his nose fell off. He's. He's one of the ghouls now. Anyway, I don't want to be nuts, but I think it's happening. I think I'm going nuts. I'll just live alone in a cabin. That's how you know it's me. When the. When the. When the raid comes, when the ATF has to come get me because I've dug a huge hole. I put. I Put mortars in it. And they just hear that.

[B]

Always see him as coming out of your house with file boxes and.

[A]

Yep. You know what, Mark? Mark my words. That day's coming, and they'll catch me like this. Like I don't know which house is his. And then inside the house, you'll just. You'll hear one of these coming out of the windows. That's him. There he is. That's the guy. Yeah, he's inside there reading the Internet again. He's going bang it down. Just knock the door down. God damn it. He's in there. He's the red one. Bright red one's in there. I promise you. Jesus Christ. He's pathetic. This is son. My gay frog son, John. You didn't even have kids. I know. They took the kids from the womb. I didn't even know I was a father. They brought it back as a frog with a homosexual tendency. It's bad Bunny.

[B]

Maggie's like, I'm gonna go walk the dogs.

[A]

He's never coming back. As good as dead.

[B]

I can't get John to come out.

[A]

There's a goose in the backyard. Flew over from the park. I know. That's Megan. Turned her into a gay lesbian goose. They brought it over with those gay neighbors who brought their agenda into the cul de sac. And now all the animals are homosexual.

[B]

What's with all those jugs of urine? He won't come out of his room.

[A]

The milk goes in the left hand. The milk goes in the left hand. Knock on the door. Are you hungry? Open up. No, the milk goes in the left hand. We're here for the urine jugs. Never gonna take my urine and make some sort of serum out of it. I don't want to be crazy, but I have started the process. So if Brady. Well, he won't tell me. Brett, leave it up to you. If I start turning red, let me know, all right? Because that's the next step.

[B]

That's a good color.

[A]

Yeah. If anybody says you've been in the sun. No loud ever be outside. That's where the chemtrails are. How's he turning all red like that? Oh, he's gone crazy. They all turn red. That's happening. I don't buy anything anymore, and I don't like that. I don't. So don't email me with your nonsense. I no longer care when people are like, you're nuts. You're right. What are you. What do you. And that's the other thing, is the emailers that feel like they're you know Woodward and Bernstein, when they email you and go, I think you've gone crazy. I'm like, I think I told you that, jackass. It's like when I quit my job 26 years ago at that other radio station, and I remember going in there a week before and said, hey, I'm talking to kupd. They. They're thinking about put me on in the morning, and they got something going on. And I just want to let you guys know that as a decent employee, I think I'm supposed to tell you, okay. And then two weeks later, when I quit, they're like, we also know that you've been talking with kupd. I'm like, oh, well, way to go, Sherlock. I think I was the mother. I told you that. What, you don't remember that you're the same dip that hired the program director that was fired once? One program director before, and you didn't even know. You didn't look at his resume long enough to know. You just hired a guy back that we worked with eight months ago. That still blows me away. Yeah, he's the dumbest man alive. Name was Marv, who's an idiot. You know what I give him one thing credit for. Well, not just him. I can't give him all the credit. He's the one that, at a very early age, taught me that all the executives in radio are probably stupid. Stupid. You got to find the gems. I think we got one sitting down the hall from us. I love Tripp because he kind of rolls his eyes, too. Maybe at me. I don't know. I haven't figured that out yet. But still, most of them are stupid. Can't do this job to save their ass. And then they do, like, little projects to stay relevant, and they're dumb. And. And Marv taught me that at an early age. Like, oh, they're all stupid. Like, they just do what you do. And they would have never allowed this show if I would have been listening to them. Like, you can't do that. You can't do that. Like, okay. And then I do it anyway, and they're like, it's working.

[B]

There's the magic to that job, trip. Every department. You gotta keep happy.

[A]

Yep. Oh, yeah, he's good. But here's the thing is, here's how I know radio executives are stupid. It's because they look at me and say, 25 years in one city. He has no idea, no idea how radio works, really. Isn't that the goal is to keep a job your whole life? Oh, Wait, you've been fired 19 times. You need that to matter. So you look at people with longevity as bad, and people have been fired 30 times as successful. Because that's your path. You suck. Not me. That's why. Anyway, this podcast is going great, right?

[B]

Our number one.

[A]

Yeah, we got to change the name of it. Red man and the Boys. Trust me, it gets more interesting from here. I got more coming up in the next hour. I got to start saying that a lot more. For podcast the next hour, we're going to look into why women spend so much money on makeup. What is it?

[B]

Because there's something in the mix, something.

[A]

In it turning them into zombies. As I say that, by the way, as a joke, my brain went, not bad. That's where I am right now. It is zombie. Zombie cream. Why do you think they sell it big? They got an aisle at Walgreens called Fountain of Youth, and there's no male products in it. It's women. Zombie makeup up. They've all gone crazy. You notice how they all look like you've seen Ariana Grande. They got her. There is something to that. Kelly Osborne, Ariana Grande, they're all starting to look like what? That? Yeah. What happened to Kelly Osborne? Thought we were into big asses. What's this? I like a girl, a little shape, but, like, not frozen. Yeah. Scared to death. When did it. When did being scared to death of food become attractive? Ariana was pretty. Now I'm like, what is that? I mean, that would be good makeup for fallout. Is Pete Davidson banging Kelly too?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Maybe Pete Davidson. Maybe it's his crank as the. It's the crank of Davidson, they call it. It goes in and it turns him into skeleton people walking the earth like the. Like white walkers from the.

[B]

Has a porcelain effect.

[A]

They just cringe and shake because they're always cold. The goal of these people is to make everybody 62 pounds. So keep shoving Ozempic into your bellies. I'm just gonna get fatter and more red and fight the system. I want to look like a tomato that's about to explode. I feel like a tick. A tick of information gonna pop, pop. I'm the information tick. Somebody make that T shirt turn bright red. Nobody to pop and hidden that way, man. I've gone. I've gone a little bit off the. Off the rails. Let's get a wake up song for this podcast here. 585-9800. A good one. We'll scream it together. Amount of time before we get rid of all these beeps too. Podcast and we'll be able to say whatever we want. The beeps. Oh, I thought you meant that smoke detector. Yeah. Not that. No. We'll never solve that mystery. Give it to us good and strong. We'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up. One final football game, and it's the.

[B]

Biggest on the calendar.

[A]

But you've still got time to get in on the action with Underdog. It's addicted to leader from the morning sickness.

[B]

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[A]

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So one last game with my team.

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[A]

Cup and JSN to all go higher on their stats. Stats new promos drop daily, so download the Underdog app today and use the promo code HMS to score 75 in fantasy bonus entries when you play your first $5 underdog make picks win. Money must be 18 +, 19 in Alabama and Nebraska, 19+ in Colorado for some games, 21+ in Arizona, Massachusetts and Virginia and present in a state where underdog fantasy operates. Terms apply. See assets.underdogfantasy.com web playand getterms_dfs_.HTML for details. Offer not valid in Maryland, Michigan, New Jersey, New York, Ohio and Pennsylvania. Concerned with your play, call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit www.in New York, call 24.7hope line at 1-877-8-HOPE NY or text HOPE NY to 467369. Still streaming Homberg's Morning Sickness [e-mail] we just offer our children up to the system with the fluoride and the water and the GMO hurting them. And we let fat perverts grab him at the airport to train them for the pedophile government. Walker told me I had aids.

[B]

Remember?

[A]

Tuesday is Soylent Green Day there. Eat the people. People are made of jello, you know. I know it's true. Car batteries. Jello is. I gotta thank John Hoffman, a Pixar superstar Local guy used to draw. He drew the logo that still lives on the podcast logo that we've got here, Homburg's morning podcast. Just call it Homeberg's Podcast Sickness. The reason I'm doing that is because I just saw some numbers a day or two ago that basically says the podcast is blasting off. Might as well start wrapping our arms around that thing. It's Huge.

[B]

It's called the cast.

[A]

The cast? You cast a cast, guest character, part.

[B]

Of the show Cast.

[A]

That's right. It's the big showgrim. That used to be a thing. For a while, radio executives thought that was funny, so they called like a hundred shows a showground. It's working for us in San Diego, so we're gonna plaster that all over the place. That was after the morning zoo stuff. Oh, yeah. Because the radio executive's ideas are all plagiarism. They do a real funny thing in San Antonio. You guys should do it. Like, what? They have an entire. Could you imagine if comedy had this comedy camp? Carlos Mencia still can't outlive the fact that he stole a joke once, which every comedian's done, by the way, and he got caught. But in radio, they have an entire convention every year. They call it sharing ideas. But what it is is stealing constantly anybody else's creativity and taking it to a market no one would know it's stolen. It's. It's unbelievable. It's flat. Unbelievable. We're gonna do what you do. Like, wasn't that, like, if a comedian's like, hey, I do this bit about, you know, shoes in the dryer. It's like, I'm gonna do that too. That's a great bit. That's a funny joke. It's. It's hack. Do a thing about choosing the dryer. Now I'm gonna do a shoes in the dryer thing this guy's gonna do. Because when I'm in Pittsburgh, he's in Kansas City, no one will know it's stolen. Radio's whole goal is like, wow, they do a great thing in la. We're gonna do that every that. Ryan Seacrest's War of the Roses. That was when that opened up my eyes. I'm like, this is the most unbelievably uncreative thing in the world. I sat in a room and played the part of one of the husbands, finding out that he sent roses to. And. And it was on nine different stations doing the same script. Like, isn't this, at a certain point, just plagiarism?

[B]

I'm so mad at you.

[A]

I was like, well, we had a couple lines and they're pretty funny, but. And then they switch it up and they just go a hotel giveaway or something like that, you know, like. But it's the same thing. Rover's roses, Ryan's roses. Wore the roses here. It's the same thing. None of it's all actors. I was one of Them once they hate. I blew that up. I'm not allowed to. When I worked at Premier Radio for like six months in la. It's just, it was a service that sent out all sorts of things. You know, we get news off of a service and they give us ideas and games for. And they do a whole bunch of morning shows and sometimes the morning shows actually play their games. I'm like, what? ChatGPT radio. It's been real for a long time. Anyway, I got a lot of emails from people who are in support of my new insanity. So, John, I've been saying this for about eight or nine years. Everything is faking gay. You're not crazy. The people on the fringes of both sides are been listening since the beginning. Thanks for the laughs, Cody. Thank you, Cody. Justin makes me feel better about turning bright red, getting fat and being nuts. Says an insane person never questions their sanity. So you're probably fine. I'm just noticing that we're all in the Truman Show. See, in the Truman show, when that movie came out, you know how. I don't know if you guys feel that way. You know, you always feel like you're kind of being observed. I don't know if you guys feel that. I've always felt like there's always been like you're under the microscope. Not necessarily that. It's almost like it's all been a show. That's where I kind of got interested in solopsism years ago. It's all been like a show like is my own consciousness. I'm the star of my own life. And you should be. There's nothing wrong with saying that. But then you like, you feel like it's all a movie or it's all an act or a play and it's all been. And you're being in the Truman show came out. I'm like, I relate to that more than anything in the world. That it all feels like for the sake of something else, you're in a bubble being watched. Yeah. Yeah. Like I'm like I'm a rat in a lab and I don't know it yet. And you know, there's the argument philosophically that that that means you believe in a higher power watching over you and all this other stuff, the obs, which is, you know, there's some validity to that feeling. But the Truman show made me feel very well with all the CCTV too. Sure. But I mean that's just legalities of you're being. You're being monitored, not constant. Yeah. You know, star of A movie kind of thing. It's weird. And Truman show made me go, wow, there's, there's more to this movie than just some idea. Like I'm not the only one who feels this way. It says, John, the abduction of Savannah Guthrie's grandmother. And this from a former cop says, I could not agree with what you're saying more. This makes no sense. You wouldn't traffic an 84 year old woman. There's no hostage demands, there's no money involved. Why her? It's actually guaranteed to explode into some sort of hatched plan. And I'll be with you when they, when you say I told you so. Because to me this stinks to high heaven. None of it adds up. That's what I thought. Second I started to read about. I'm like, ah, I wanted to avoid that. Let's read about it. I'm like, oh no, no, no, no. None of it's right. Ian says, come on, John do Gambit ding dong. Talking about his new crazy sources. My sources tell me if looking out my Peller windows, I was the Peller windows Gambit ding dong. My sources tell me my handy dandy crazy guy book that this is definitely going to be an illegal alien. I knew this from beginning. I talked to Adam Schefter. He's one of my sauces. Speaking of sauces, the sauce is over there at Payway. You cannot get past them. They're so delicious. I ate 431 pot stickers yesterday just for protein so I could swim home on the road. Cause I don't need water to swim. I'm that strong.

[B]

Golden glove.

[A]

I'm a Golden Gloves champion from at least 38 years ago. And I used to just get in the ring and the guys across me would go give them the gloves. They didn't even try and fight me. Sources tell me that they were all afraid. And I got sauces like Brady's Brady sauce and the Brett's mother's sauce. I got all sorts of sauces. And don't forget purified water. Gotta have your water sources tell me to be an illegal alien. We never went to the moon. Bananas. You got a couple others too. So we'll get into this one. Oh wait, I'm gonna do this first. Did you guys see that President Trump may have pooped his pants yesterday? I did not get a lot of emails about this. Here's the video. Let's see if we can. It's a minute long, but let's see if we can all hear it together. He may have Pooped his pants in the middle of this thing. And then clears the room. And it's that bad. It's evidently audible. I have not heard this yet, but I've gotten too many emails from people to say that Biden term is going to be a thing of the past. Stupid thing. Stupid, stupid thing. How do you do? I'm so proud of you. And fellas, what is happening with us? Great things happening. Great. Really great things happening.

[B]

I hear. And some pretty big announcements over a.

[A]

Short period of time, Right? Yep. Moving drugs over the counter so you don't need a prescription.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

No. Naloxone, which treats opioid, is one of those drugs. And we're being proactive with synthetic.

[B]

7 oh, 8.

[A]

I'm watching Robert Kennedy behind him showing up. His eyebrows. Just went up on addressing that because.

[B]

Are coming up with new opioids faster.

[A]

Than the government has been able to keep up. We're going proactive on these new chemicals. That's great. Now I hear fantastic things. Thank you all very much.

[B]

We really appreciate it a lot.

[A]

Thank you. Kennedy cannot wait to get away.

[B]

Fantastic.

[A]

Thank you all very much. I appreciate it. Thank you. Please.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

Instead of questions, which he loves, people think ISIS attacked. Everybody out. I didn't hear it, though. I want to hear the fart.

[B]

I thought I heard a little.

[A]

I think I did, too. Did you? Yeah, it's. It happened on the 29th.

[B]

Kind of.

[A]

I talked about over the fart.

[B]

It was right when you're saying something.

[A]

That would mean. That would mean. Yes. Was it early? I didn't hear the fart, but evidently he pooped his pants, which I. Yeah, I thought I heard something, too. Things are getting weirder by the second. And if it's true, I find it hysterical. He's 80. What do you expect? Exactly. Surprised it took this long. I know.

[B]

Surprise.

[A]

We're not dealing with this on the regular basis.

[B]

I got to see the video now.

[A]

Yeah. Big beautiful poop. Yeah. It's funny to see Kennedy behind him that you go. His eyebrows just go up like, oh, somebody dropped a bomb. That's those Big Macs and everything. He eats all the time. Eating all the Big Macs. That's right. The Big Macs are a problem for him. And he tries to better diet. Yes. Robert Kennedy the other day is like, who in the White House has the worst diet? Trump. Like immediately. It's horrible. I don't know how he's still alive. Yeah. His eyebrows go up. I didn't hear it, but his eyebrows went up. You know. When somebody in the car farts. What that. And he's right behind it. I believe I may have sharted. I apologize to everybody. Everyone out. It's about to get really weird. This is one of those orange ones, you know, that you digested it, but it still looks like the inside of a pumpkin. You know when your dog is sick and you give him the pumpkin mix and then it comes out bright orange? I'm guessing that's what I'm gonna find.

[B]

It's just such an important meeting. I. I can't say anything.

[A]

I can't. I just crap my pants.

[B]

I gotta imagine it'd be the first time. Oh, my gosh. Trump just bombed us.

[A]

Yeah. If somebody said, Mr. President, did you just. Your pants. I think so. I think I did. I don't know for sure, but I'm.

[B]

Running a little rich.

[A]

I'm running really rich. Melania got me a bowl of pumpkin this morning. I said I don't feel well. I wasn't eating my breakfast. Like a terrier. Sometimes when a terrier won't eat, it's good to have the pumpkin food. They always eat that. It's very soothing. It makes. But they poop orange. And I think I just did that. Everyone out. I've got to wipe my cheeks. Probably down on the thighs. I'm not gonna lie. There was a big one. It either went down or up. I don't know if I rooster tailed or dropped bombs. I don't know if I went Nagasaki or straight up like a balloon.

[B]

It wouldn't surprise me if he talked like that.

[A]

What he talks about his food, everything else.

[B]

He's very.

[A]

Melania Baron. You gotta come in here and see this. What is it, Donald? Look at the cheeks and the thighs. It's orange. It's everywhere. It's like I sat on a pumpkin. I don't even know how it came out of one hole. It looks like it's sprayed like a wacky weasel. I think it's fun. And I need help.

[B]

Calls him in all the time.

[A]

You guys have to come in and look at this drain snake. I just threw in the dream snake. This is a beast. That's a presidential dookie right there. That is.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Out of the water and nobody's ever seen a color. A lot of people say it's golden. A lot of culture. The golden poo. That's beautiful. That's a gorgeous thing. I poop a lot of orange. I poop orange. I didn't hear him poop it, but it's very funny. I didn't hear it but it's clear that something happened because the people behind him. The one lady's fists like she clenches her fists like it's just. You know. Cuz when you have an accidental. It usually is the worst smelling kind that ain't coming out whole. No. This one was a log. I just. I thought I could get away with a little one. Turned out I had to just have a very healthy one and I let a log out. I didn't let the. It wasn't a squirt or Brett. Not a squirt, not a little squirt. Just a big log. It would have been a two footer in the drain. I'd had to flush in the middle. But I put it in my head. SPD but could have been. But it was. No, it was. Might have been a little louder than I wanted. But also a full log. Brady. I'm gonna hold my hands up like a fisherman. This big. Wow. Yeah. A lot of people say I've got the biggest ones sometimes it's bigger than the drain bread. It's thicker. Wow. Doesn't even go in the hole. And we all know what that means. If you luxurious girth turds too big to go in the drain that means you're too big in a lot of areas. Did you supersize that value meal today? I had it. I had a double double and two quarter pounders and a lot of fries. They didn't have Coke Zero and that bothers me. So I'm back to diet cook. That might have upset my tummy me which is why I'm sitting in a puddle of my own orange.

[B]

He's got his own item off menu. The big Trump.

[A]

You know I used to work there Brady for a day. Remember I worked the Friars and that day I didn't myself but yesterday I did. Yeah. Yeah. So leave him alone. He probably hadn't eaten all day and went through the Taco Bell drive through like you did the other night. Yeah, but I made it to the toilet. I didn't just dump in the uh. Oh. Wouldn't have been great if he'd have just acknowledged it, right? Oh boy. I'm sitting in a puddle of it. You guys heard it. Let's not act. Let's acknowledge what happened. We have a red scare right now. I bet you there's blood in it. I'm old. If you just blame J.D. vance or something for dropping J.D.

[B]

Well knowing that and we talked about it at the beginning of the year like when he was. He had to stand that whole Time during the inauguration.

[A]

Oh, man, he's 80 years old.

[B]

They're diapering up all of them.

[A]

As it says. It's right at the beginning of the video. It sounds like a front butt. I didn't hear it. And this thing's actually. It's real quiet. Is it? You can hear it. Kind of hear it if you're listening. But AI will fix it. I'll watch it later. Grab my pants. Everyone out. He loves questions. So if he ever clears a room, no questions. We've got to go. And it was something as he was about to celebrate how this. They've won something in the drug trade and they're like, winning. And he loves the press asking him questions about when something good happens. If they had to leave, that was real and everyone knew it. Get out. And the press secretary lady, that pregnant blonde, she's just waving her arms like.

[B]

God, her nose is ultra sensitive.

[A]

Yeah, she's pregnant right now. Sorry, Caroline, leave it. I just crapped. And I know you can smell it from at least five miles. It's like a lion's rock roar. And a lot of people, compared to my. My fecal noises as lion roars. They hear it all the way down 2 miles down 2, 3, 4 miles. Sometimes pretty quiet mornings, you can hear it on the golf course by the Potomac. It's a big lion's roar. King of the jungle they call my anus. It can eat a gazelle. Shove it in and it comes out gazelle shaped. It's. It's quite impressive. Today I'm gonna hold Baron up over my head and we're gonna play the Circle of Life. It's the Lion King. That's what that is. Good movie. Sometimes feel like Mufasa before the stampede, of course. So dumb. Yeah. The world's gone mad and I'm right in the middle of it. But I'm glad to see that all the emails coming in are basically saying, you're not crazy crazy, or are all the rest of you crazy too? This guy says it's 31.31seconds into the video. This guy says 32 seconds in the video, people just like, they've got it timed perfectly. Yeah, this is a good email I got from this lady.

[B]

It's gonna be modified, that video.

[A]

Oh, the next round. Oh, there's gonna be. Oh, it's gonna be. AI is gonna splatter RFK with diarrhea. It's gonna be like. Or like Leslie Nielsen at the pisser. Oh, yeah. Oh, Mr. President, are you okay? I've never felt Better. I gotta be honest with you. It is on my thighs, though. Stop saying that. We've all been there. How did it get down there? How is it, you know, you think you've, but then you wipe and you look and you're like, why is it not coming? They realize there's some on your balls and like, how did that happen? Happen? How did I get it? Now my balls are dipping in it like a bag of tea in a nice orange mandarin. Because when you eat wrong, your poop's orange.

[B]

We could use a sham.

[A]

Wow. Some of it's got green on it. That means it's healthy. It's not all bad. I bet it floats. This one is great. I like this one a lot. Says, hey, John, as a woman that has to hear from. Oh, that has to hear how I'm expired from Brett all the time. I like that you giggle. I want to let you know I have legitimate questions. Hold on. My ex husband is married to a girl 27 years younger than him. I was 16 years younger, but I guess that wasn't enough. And I hear you guys yesterday acting like Bill Belichick is the luckiest man alive, but you have to wonder why that girl can't get a really rich 50 year old old. Because it's creepy. People think I'm in my 20s and I'm 56. No, they don't stretch it. No, they don't send a picture. Let's see it. Yeah. D Toledo at 98k. Waste our time with like the most filtered thing you've ever sent. Send an unfiltered photo. Come on. Says the guy I'm dating now gets asked all the time if I'm his daughter and we're only six years apart part. So why do you guys get so excited about Belichick when you can find a girl who looks young? Rachel, Here's the thing I'm struggling with with this one. Go ahead. Yeah, the Bella check thing. Thank you. The belichick thing, he's 76. He's 24. It's weird. 48 years, we figured, yeah, 72. There was 72 and 24. Whatever. So it is a strange thing because. But. But for men, the key to us. And I said this the other day. Feel desired. Manifestation of desired support. That's all we need. We want to feel relevant. And so often you don't in your 70s. So if you get attention from somebody like that girl like Belichick's getting, it's going to perk his ears up. Because deep down inside, our brains are still like 25. When that. We never. We never get past that. When the human brain is fully formed around 24, 25, a man stops everything. We might learn more stuff, but we're not developing past that. We look in the mirror and we're like, who's that guy? Because who we think we are is different. But after I read this, I realized, here's the problem. She's trying to convince us she looks like she's in her 20s, right? She loves the compliment that her boyfriend is sometimes confused for her father. But when it's real, it's gross. Women spend.

[B]

Yeah, what her thing of she wants thing.

[A]

This is awesome. She wants people to think that it's that relationship, but when it's a real one, that way it's gross. Women spend billions and billions and billions of dollars annually to try not to age, to look like exactly what they think. A man is a pervert for liking. If a dude in his 60s likes a girl who's 28, he gets destroyed. But if a woman in her 40s looks like she's 28, she gets praised. The goal is to look like you're young and then shame people for liking what looks good. Just go to Postino's every happy hour and you'll find it. Look, there's Botox again. I mentioned it earlier. Walters Walgreens. Exactly. Walgreens has a fountain of youth aisle. I don't see men's products in there. They're constantly trying to look like they're in their 20s and then get mad that people like what 20 year olds look like. What's not to like? See, I'm a philosopher. So you spend all that money and then I'll under. I. I guarantee. I know your argument back. Well, that's the pressure men put on women to look a certain way. It's a pressure women put on women to look. It's the beauty standard. No, it's your standard. Don't do it then. Then why do you do it?

[B]

What are you going for when you're, you know, you want to look in your 20s.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you're gonna get mad if Brady says, God, that girl's beautiful. She's 25. We spent $20,000 on your face to get you close to that. You wanted to do it It. You're trying not to look old, and you get mad that the beauty standard that you're trying to uphold is something that I might like or Brady might like. Mostly Brady's kind of a pervert. So don't yell at me. Rachel from Mesa that Bill Belichick has done this. Yell at yourself for saying I look like I'm in my 20s. That's my goal. I work real hard to look like I'm 20 something. But don't you find a real 20 something person attractive? Or you're a weirdo. Like what? Look at me solving problems. This podcast. Preach on, Brother John. Preach. I mean, I'm not mad at you for doing it, but don't be mad at us for liking it or not. Us. Bill Belichick yeah, it's not for everyone. What the youth. It's for most of but that's my point.

[B]

No to appreciate or like to think she's beautiful.

[A]

No, it's amazing. But if Ronnie Ronnie I'm Skin care products tries not to get wrinkles. They all do. Talks about how old they are, talks about fillers, baskets, hundreds of dollars weekly. And they say they're doing that for you. But what Rachel's saying is that stopped.

[B]

All of a sudden.

[A]

People think my my boyfriend is my dad. I'm like, it's not creepy when it's you, but when it, when it like it's David Foster and Catherine McGee or whatever her name is, is everybody. That's gross. I'm like, why is that gross? That's what you're shooting for. You're just chronologically not able to do it.

[B]

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[A]

Holmberg's Morning Sickness. I'm not mad at you ladies, but don't yell at us for saying that is a good beauty standard. That's a pretty person. Oh, she's 28. Oh, I'm sorry. Isn't that what you're shooting for? There's not what we spent all that money on. On Botox and surgeries to lift your boobs and mommy makeovers so you don't look like you're. What? Knock it off. I think I'm just tired of it. I think I'm tired of us getting yelled at before everything. Did you like that? Yeah, that was nice. Oh, pervert. I'm like, what?

[B]

Oh, wait for the next batch of Belichick kids.

[A]

Oh, I hope that happens. Oh, Brady, can we pray to your God that Belichick knocks her up? Oh, my God. Baby Jesus. Baby Jesus. Brady. Brady's baby Jesus, Please put one of Belichick's seeds inside that cheerleader and make. Make every woman's headaches but just erupt. They wouldn't take it. I mean, Rachel, go back. I'm not being a jerk. I'm trying not to be. I'm trying to, but I'm just being a realistic person. The emails are flowing in. You're yelling at me, but you. You were. You were proud that people think your boyfriend is your dad. That's creepy. But she doesn't really.

[B]

But the email.

[A]

Yeah, it's. The email starts, my husband married a girl 27 years younger than him. I was 16 years younger. I guess that wasn't enough. You're mad at that.

[B]

A little bitter.

[A]

But you're thrilled that people think your current boyfriend is your dad.

[B]

Life is good now.

[A]

Yeah. But you're mad that he went out and actually got a real one. Everything's mad. It's creepy when he's doing it. But you're doing the exact same thing with magic smoke and mirrors. And it makes you happy. That's a good thing. Be happy with it. Be happy with it. But you set that standard up yourself and then get mad at us for going, oh, okay, well, there's real ones, and then there's you. You look amazing, Rachel. You probably look amazing. But don't get mad for looking young and then being mad that there is young. They'll drive you crazy, though, the young. So don't be crazy in 56. Is that possible? No. Okay, yeah, there's. No. I can't. I can't. If Brett's right. He kind of. Yeah. You threw, you threw stop sticks on that one. My tires went flat on that. I was gonna try to help Rachel, but he's right. He can't. Never mind.

[B]

He's out of the bag.

[A]

Never mind.

[B]

Years ago.

[A]

Yeah. Those muffins fell out of that tent a long time. I was like, stuffing toothpaste. I can't do it. Yeah, don't get mad at me, Rachel. And when I read this yesterday when she emailed it, and I was, I was trying to be like, well, I get it.

[B]

I thought there might have been something more, you know? Where, oh, where's she going with this? The husband? I'm like, oh, that's kind of bitter.

[A]

She's mad at that. Yeah, she's bitter about that. And then she's mad at us for liking for, you know, facetiously high fiving that all men have a chance to still be relevant in their 70s. Facetious. Yeah. All right. That's not. It's on my thighs, Brett. I've got facetious all over my thighs. Guys, I did that yesterday. No, I, I. And I don't want to be. I, I want to be nice about it, but I also want to know your emails all over the map. My ex husband. What do you care? You got a new boyfriend. Let him live his life. You think he's a jerk or a weirdo, but so be it. But you're working your ass off to prove to people that you're in your 20s when you're not in your thing. Where did she write it? People think I'm in my 20s and I'm 56. If that's true, good for you. But don't be mad at people really in their twenties who you're competing with, because that makes you upset. You put yourself in their pool. We didn't do it. All we care about is, is she hot? Brett could come in here right now. It's like, dude, I met a girl. And amazing. Shows us pictures. Like, she's beautiful. Beautiful. She's 74. It wouldn't matter to us visually. We're like, you can't tell. That's it. It's a, it's the, it's the, the, the, the car from Bullet.

[B]

I can't believe.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Eleanor.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Is that the 60 seconds? Okay, that's gone 60 seconds, Eleanor. You don't care that it's a kit car? It just looks right. Yeah. Is this the real one? People would say, no, this thing's 70, but it looks like the real one. One. Rachel. You do this to yourself. Don't yell at us again. Desire. Manifestation of desire and support. I've given you the recipe. Those are the answers in the back of the book of man. Desire, Manifestation of desire. Support. End it. We're not difficult, nothing more. Occasionally stick a finger in our butt. That's it. But that's part of the manifestation of. Just knock first. Yeah. Let me know. You're doing it. Don't Shazam me. I'll shoot to the ceiling and I'll stand up and hit my head on the ceiling fan. Again. Don't do that. Dry. But yeah. Don't yell at us. Rachel. Stop it. You're doing it. And then you're mad that we notice. It's. We were so simple. Do you look good? We don't care how old you are. We don't. That's scary. It can be 80. Doubt it. That's a tall, uniform, huge unicorn. But you know what? 80 would have to do. And they do loads of surgeries to try to erase time, to get rid of those canyons of stories that live on their face. The wind swept, you know, the tapestry that became their heads. No, they don't want that. They don't want it. They try to stretch it out. How can I not look my age? And then when we go, that girl's pretty. Chase 30, like you. That's all you do is shoot for 30. I'm on the Internet. I see it. The time reversal. Cindy Crawford looks like she's in her 30s. She's 60. That's a goal. Then they get mad when men are like, that's a man. Good for Bill Belichick. He's a pervert. What are you doing? If you could look 11, you would. Hey, Sofia Vergara is 53, and she looks amazing. She's getting some help. Help. Oh, of course. This one says she's probably a fat chick. Flaunts her big, fat, gross boobs because they're big. And she thinks that big, fat, sloppy boobs are what we like. Jesus, George.

[B]

Is that her ex?

[A]

It might be her. I'm not saying that about you, Rachel, but my God. Anyway, yeah, I'm sure the emails are exploding. Our podcast email. They're ridiculous.

[B]

Us.

[A]

And am I right? Everybody's on my side? Absolutely. Yeah. And I like that you're doing it. I think it's beautiful that you take care of yourself. I. I try to take care of myself. I'm ugly as sin, but I'm doing the best I can, you know, the best compliment I've Gotten in a long time. I ran into my buddy Andy Swingle. Went to high school in junior high with Andy. He's a good dude. And Andy and I were chatting away at a thing, and he said, what are you doing? I'm like, what are you talking about? And he goes, goes. And Andy looks terrible. I'm not gonna lie. His life is beaten. Andy to death. No, I'm kidding. But he's like, you look like you're in your, like, early 40s. You're killing us. I don't know nothing. But I do use face products because I've noticed that it makes my face feel better. I'm not fixing this face. If you look at it, ain't nothing about this thing that's pretty pretty. It ain't happening. But I will do things to make it so it doesn't look beat up to the best of my ability. Try to stay in shape a little bit. But it has nothing to do with trying to look younger. It's trying to feel good. And if in turn, people think I look. Some people think I look like I'm in my 60s. I don't know. I don't care. Do I feel all right about me? I'm all right. I got some work to do. What I'm pretty good about, I'm pretty confident with me. But this Belichick thing's got everybody up in arms every time it's brought up.

[B]

You're not doing anything that looks like, oh, he's done something he's doing.

[A]

I've tried Botox to see what it was like. You did your Cindy Crawford thing. I love that meaningful beauty. And currently I'm on an Ellen DeGeneres program that is. Look, Portia de Rossi and Ellen, for all their views and everything else that you may not like them, they might be jerks. They have incredible skin. They really do. And they do a commercial that I saw, and I'm like, their skin is amazing. So I signed up for that program. I'm really enjoying it. I like the overnight repair. It feels good when I sleep. There's a serum I put on at night.

[B]

It's very nice. How long does it take?

[A]

You know what? I skip it a lot. I'm not as consistent as I should be, but it takes me about five minutes. I don't do the micro exfoliant on a regular basis, and I probably should.

[B]

You need to be more consistent.

[A]

I have to be more consistent with the regimen, as they say. This podcast has gone off the rails. Women get upset about. About it. Oh, My God, you got like a facial thing. I don't want to. I don't want to. Ruddy weird. I'm ugly. I gotta keep this thing as close to normal as I am an ugly man. Ugly men, don't you try a little harder not to be more ugly. It's like fat bros. I gotta try a little harder. Yes, that's me. Man, would I if I was a girl. I'd be the best at blowjobs because making up for this face. Jesus. I'd be on all sorts of skin care. If I was a woman, I'd be shooting needles in my head and. And sucking out fat every chance I got. This guy says, now see, I told you they're not. Jason, you're just being mean. I'm not being mean to you, Rachel, but the listeners are. Jason says, yeah, that lady may look like she's in her 20s, but a better vagina doesn't. We don't know that. We don't know that. We're almost sure you're 100% right, Jason, but we don't know that. I know.

[B]

Looks good on the outside.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Come on. This one says what these broads leave out too, is that they stop blowing and screwing their axes, who end up finding younger women who love screwing and blowing. They never mentioned that they might be the problem. All right, maybe. Praise the Lord. No, no. Let's not cast aspersions on whether or not Rachel was banging that guy who ended up with it. She was 16 years younger than the guy she was with before who moved on to 27 years younger. I don't know what that means.

[B]

Well, what does she expect when she turns, she's 50, so 35 or whatever. 37.

[A]

You can trade it her in for 225. It's all good. But I'm being nice. You guys are dicks. A woman 56 can still be a beautiful woman. I know they can. Absolutely. The clock is right twice a day. I knew he'd do something done with that. They can be gorgeous. It happens.

[B]

You need to do three things.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

No matter what.

[A]

Desire. Manifestation of desire. Support. That's it.

[B]

You'll be beautiful your entire life.

[A]

That's it. I came up with that yesterday when I read Rachel's email. We need three things. That's it. It's boiled down to the basics. Desire, Manifestation of desire, Support. Period. End of story. That's it. Well, that's in there. The manifestation. When you go into manifesting, it looks like an apple agreement. The subset manifestation of desire is the apple agreement. It is pages. And then at the end you go, I agree. And then you can't skip anything. But stop yelling at us when you guys are spending all that goddamn money to not look your age that we find not your age attractive. It's not our fault anymore. We as men have to have a little revolution to go. All right, all right. Back to reality, everybody. We've had fun being your simps. We're not going to do it anymore. Anymore. This beauty standard's too hard. Then don't do it. I have to or you will. No. This is why I'm gonna leave this crying and whining about it. You look great. Quit pointing out all the things that are supposed to be wrong with you and taking my desire manifestation of desire and support away. Donovan says. You guys sure she didn't say her breasts look like they're 20? As in hanging down 20 inches? No, that's. Rachel's a nice lady. I didn't say I. Donovan did. Yeah, but she's mad and also she. Rachel, go back and read your email again. Or at least listen to what we're saying. You were angry and bitter. Oh, she's angry now. Maybe. Maybe she's just going, oh, that could be. It's time we stopped. I don't know what's going on. Everybody's emailing me about it now. So who's gonna write the new theme song for Homburg's morning skincare routine? All right, Greg, there's no need for any of that. That's a. It's not a morning skincare thing. Although I do was again in the morning to get the serum off. I do struggle with the serum on the pillow too because it's gross. But I'm working on it. But I'm not trying to look like I'm younger. I'm just trying not to be ugly. Er, which I think time will start pushing my direction. It's a. It's a huge self admission to know I'm ugly and I have to kind of help that along long. And I'm not going to go get like a nose job, which I've had doctors suggest. Cuz this thing's a mess. Got a deviated septum and it's crooked like your nose is on sideways. Yeah, it's been broken a few. We can fix that. I'm like, I bet you can't. Ah, this says a female comedic. This is from Showtime chain. Female comedian once said if vaginas had odometers, they'd never get laid. It's probably true, but I'm not bashing on you, lady. I'm just saying that it is a very strange conundrum that you've put yourself in by trying to look 27, being proud that you look 27, being proud that your boyfriend is often confused as your father, and then being mad, mad at your ex because that's exactly what he went for. But if she thinks something's wrong with him, why is she going for dudes that are 16 years older than her and all that kind of stuff? If it's per view because it was. Because her boundary was 16 and then he went 27 and now she's bad. My guess is they were together for about nine years and then he went back to. She got expired the age she liked. So what is she, 56? Well, no, because she probably looks great. But he's like, nah, not dealing with all the yelling. There's a reason Playboy was so wildly successful for 50 years. And it wasn't putting old ladies in the centerfold. It wasn't occasionally, like Joan Collins or Vanna White would pop up and you know what pictures they used before, they were still stars. Joan Collins laid out once when she was like 55, and everybody's like, all right, they were good. But there was a lot of help in that. There was a lot. So quit yelling. At the time, men stood up, said, stop yelling at us for that. You guys do it. You're doing this. Don't yell at me that. The standard's too high. If that's the case, don't do it. Well, then I won't get attention. Well, then that's your. That's your goal. So accept that. Your goal is to get attention and leave us out of it. We do not care about your eyelashes. We do not care about your nails unless they're dirty. We don't care about all the stuff you're doing. You're not doing it for us. Because if we keep telling you I don't care what your nails look like. I don't care what you're. If you wear fake eyelashes or if you have. We don't care.

[B]

That's for you, maybe care a little bit. You don't care.

[A]

As far as, like, you do not care. Brady. Ronnie goes out of the house with her with. Without them.

[B]

With 3 inch eyelashes.

[A]

All right. Yeah, yeah. Oh, you. You have something you're attracted to and not painted on. But if Ronnie went out one night, I don't want to be embarrassed by it either. If Ronnie went out and vice versa I'm sure without makeup and a hat and a T shirt, you wouldn't care.

[B]

I'm okay.

[A]

If she went out looking great, you'd be like, you look amazing. And it would be the same. She comes back and goes, you didn't even notice I got my nails done. It's because we don't care. We'll notice that it looks nice, but we don't care. If you didn't do it, we would. We'd feel the exact same. So long as they're not dirty. Like you've been working on an engine. Sure. It looks good when you. Everybody looks. Women always said, I like a man in a suit. Yeah, we don't wear them every day, but when we do, it's nice. Stop yelling at me. Rachel. Bill Belichick got desired. The manifestation of desire. And evidently he's getting some support. Does it look weird? Yep. But you admitted in your own email that you and your boyfriend look weird too. And you're fine with that because it's really not weird. You're just happy that people don't know how old you are. Now they're doing the math. If she's 56 or ex is 16 years older, means he's 72 and his new girlfriend is 48. He's got money. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. If he had a lot, a lot of money, she'd be be 28. But like Belichick. Yeah. Cuz he's 72 and he didn't go dipping into the 40s. Weirdo. No. Stop yelling at us. I'm gonna roll this morning. This podcast is amazing. For our first podcast, this is it. Jesus, lady. If you spent this much time in the gym and working your self confidence, you'd be hot. Being old, angry and becoming the email. Karen, not hot. See? And I'm not going to say she's angry. I'm going to say she's, she's, she's kind of confused. She wants it to be her way and she hates that it sometimes goes against her way.

[B]

He's making the fact that I'm, you know, I'm this age and I still look at me.

[A]

Yeah, that's awesome. Be happy with it. And don't be mad at people who are actually the age people think you are. Just take your win, take your dubs, take your dubs. But a billions of dollars in skincare products. Tell me one thing. Thing. You guys don't want to look your age. You lie about it. Greg puts it a very good way. Just basically, I know you got the email too. Oh, Greg Carlson. Yeah. Yeah. It says, my wife had skin cancer on her face, right above her lip and her nose. By her nose. It was bad. And they had to do plastic surgery to repair. After removing, she always was super worried about how she looks and says the scar on her face is all she sees. She asked me why I don't notice her career care. And now that you're saying this, it makes me feel desired. She takes care of me and she treats me well. I ain't going nowhere. That's all it takes.

[B]

There you go.

[A]

That's all it takes. Keep that in your brains, boys. Desire. Manifestation of desire. Support. All we need. That's it. In turn, you get protection, support. And you know, we'll provide for you. That's an easy trust trade. And we'll do everything. But once it starts to slide and both sides, dudes have to do it, too. That's what they want, too. You have to be good on your end. We screw it up just as much. Anyway. Just saying, Rachel, thank you. You made my brain work yesterday, and I think I came out of this the winner. And that's all that's important here is that I made you look like a lunatic. And I look really good. Thank you very much. Brett, what do you have on the big board of Musical Treats? As I've solved so many problems, people want to know if your new skincare line is going to be called Jugo. No, it's not. Not called Jugo. This Winston says, I'm 41 years old today. Happy birthday. When I forgot today's his birthday. He's a couple days after you. He said I still look older than my sister, who is 16 years older than me. That's awesome. Does she get mad when people think she's her late 20s, early 30s? Probably not. But if her husband's looking at somebody in his in her early 30s, she's going to get upset, even though that's the standard she's setting. And I'm mad at Winston's sister, too. I'm sorry, that was. And again, black don't crack. That is a better thing. Your skin looks good. You don't need Ellen DeGeneres stuff like I do. When I wonder if. Wynn, do you have a win at Tech Spec? Do you have a skincare product, a routine, and not just your elbows. He's. He just gave me a mother effort in the car. All right. On the list for all the craziness going on in the world for some reason. Quiet riot, mama. We're all crazy now. I like Food from the Descendants for Ariana Grande. Yeah. Sepultura, Ozzy, Electric Call Boy, Comfortably Numb for everything that's going on right now. Clutch, Three Days Grace, Going Crazy, Slipknot, Disaster Piece, the Warning, and Metallica, the Frayed Ends of Sanity for Rachel, because she's definitely on the ends of it. Let's not make Rachel crazy. Let's just bring her back to center. Is that possible? No, because she's bouncing all over like a pinball. Come on, Just take Reality and Logic. Oh, there's a perfect. Asking that. Oh, that's way too big an order. Amazon's gonna fire back. Oh, we can't do it in one day. Yeah, that's it. Winston just text back said, yeah, I just went to a facial. I need to do better with a routine. Well, and I don't know if I. That Ellen's generous program is pretty solid. You need to put your ju Goo out there. Yeah. Scott Haynes says. I just want to say to Rachel, thank you for being a friend. Travel down the road and back again. That's the theme to Golden Girl. Scott, I see what you're doing, you son of a bitch.

[B]

Is true.

[A]

I've often said that if there was a radio station that played comfortably numb 24 hours a day, I'd listen to it multiple times a week. Do a little Floyd. I think Floyd's a thing. Let's do it.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Comfortably Numb is just one of those. One of the best guitar songs ever. Yeah, it's sort of the Shashank or Casino or A Few Good Men, where no matter where it is in the song, you just leave it on till it's over. You show up in Shawshank Redemption zone, you're going to watch Kevin Pollock Toledo hang out.

[B]

You don't want to protest.

[A]

No. Toledo and I were watching a video with Kevin Pollock yesterday and Rich Eisen called A Remote Drop. There's certain movies that no matter if you just stumble across them, you're like, well, there's 18 minutes left. I'm going to watch it. There's two hours left. Casino is. Brett and I both share. Casino is one of the up. Casino's on. We're not going anywhere until this is over. Casino Shawshank gets me every time. Field of Dreams has gotten in that. But Comfortably Numb is one of those songs that no matter where it is, if I stumble across, I can't find it myself. Same as Shawshanker Casino. I can't just start it on my own. But if it. If I happen to stumble across, if I'M in a store and it's on. I'm staying till it's over. It's a great. It's an amazing song.

[B]

What was the Eisen? Was it the.

[A]

Just while I was talking to Ken Falk. I don't know what it was, but just a little clip of what we showed yesterday. You got it? All right, here it goes. Right now, we're planning. I'm gonna sit back and enjoy that. Rachel, I love you. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. 98k. Still streaming. Homer, morning sickness. [e-mail] getting it in on time. Johnny with a legal ID. That's still a radio thing we have to do on the podcast now. I'm just gonna start calling it that. I'm tired of saying to people, do a radio show. Radio. Oh, don't just do a thing. Just digital thing. I tell them I do a podcast. Like, awesome man. Semantics. And then I think of the Bobs, and I'm like, way to ruin it, boys. Way to ruin it. The free thing that no one wanted. And I can point down the hall and show you exactly why, because you started doing that more often than you did the fun stuff. Dummies. We'll work through this. I'm excited about the new crazy. Me turning bright red and getting fat. He's gonna have answers. Answers, I tell you, it's a whole new world rejuvenated. Anyway, it's time now for Brady to get. Wait a minute. I got a couple emails in there. This one's about Trump pooping his pants. AI says, Trump Shart. Big effing deal. John says the old man crapped his pants. So I'm 56. I'm not even 80. I took the dogs for a walk last night at 5:30. Got around the first corner, let one out. I'm alone. I'm outside. Perfect. Nope. Massive, massive shart. You know damn well there's no way these dogs are turning around at the end of the block. So I even finished the walk in my own squishins. John was down on the thighs like mine, wasn't it, John? Yeah, you get it down there on those thighs and you're walking around you. Feels like a nice lubricant for a while. And then it dries up like clay, like an adobe house. You don't want that in the hair. And then it turns into like mud. The day after the rain and the sun and then the cooks in the tire tread. And you're down there with. With one of Those things that painters use. A scraper, trying to get it out of the hair. And it hurts. It doesn't feel good. You consider shaving, but that would leave marks. Stop crapping your pants. It's time for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our friends over atallpro shade.com. saw their trucks riding around the other day. It's coming back from the casino, daylight, driving back. And I'm like, look at that. Up and running on a Saturday morning, getting it done. Hopefully it was one of ours. They'll put some shades on your patio. Videos that look great, motorized or otherwise. They've got sales that will not look like you did it yourself.

[B]

Got a big week coming up next week.

[A]

What is it?

[B]

It's shade week.

[A]

What does that mean?

[B]

So the new warehouse has all their. All the shades that are made new in the box. They're blowing them out up to 50.

[A]

Get them gone.

[B]

They want to clear it out for their orders. The new orders are coming in.

[A]

So you're basically saying, don't do anything this week. Wait, Shade week. Yeah, Shady. It's about to get shady. Phoenix. Hey, it's going to get shady. No, don't. Anyway, All Pro Shade.com Shade Week is coming and they'll do it for you. But I. I drove by house the other day, had those sails in the backyard, and one was like purple and the other one was like a weird beige and then a third one was green and a like, got a deal. It looked terrible. Let them do it right. Design it right. You did that yourself. You put an eye hook in your house and all the stucco went away. So where you're. And now it's gray where you chipped off. They'll do it right. Trust me. They get it right. It doesn't make. Make your house look like a DIY project. Make it. Make it perfect. These guys are the best for a reason. But at it for over 20 years. Also for a reason. All pro shade.com Shade Week is coming. Brady Report it.

[B]

Good Tuesday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.

[A]

Hi.

[B]

Happy national take a cruise day.

[A]

You're just supposed to hop up and start cruising today.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or just buy your cruise for later and you can't hit us spontaneously. Would take a cruise day in your car.

[B]

Take a little cruise.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

I thought you're talking carnival.

[B]

I don't know. Do that too.

[A]

Hellcats unite.

[B]

Do that on the dolly steamboat.

[A]

I don't know if that's a Good idea to just hit people over the head with that. Because you're right. Then the hellcats start running down to the carnival. Gotta get milk.

[B]

Got a couple of basics.

[A]

National cruise day. You have to know about that about three months in advance. Like, oh yeah. And then you pick out, oh, we're gonna go on a cruise on February 3rd.

[B]

Not every model T was black. Black for the first few years of production.

[A]

Great.

[B]

Came in gray, green, blue, and red.

[A]

I've seen the gray ones. Cheap paint.

[B]

I wonder if the. They're more expensive. What you like. The red and blue have to be more rare because you rarely.

[A]

Yep. Really see them. I don't see many Model Ts at all. Brady, if you're still seeing them, they're rare. But the red one, even check.

[B]

I wonder if Eric Jackson had a model T go up on the block.

[A]

They had that 1929 arrow, which I'd never even heard of. So that looked pretty cool. The guy had a cracked windshield. I put it in the New Vision Auto glass commercial and I was like, how do you fix that? He goes, new vision. And because he. I knew him, I'm like, really? The commercials that. He goes, yes. And then he said. I said that because of you. And I'm like, oh, can they really fix it? And he goes, probably. Probably. It's just a piece of glass. So I don't know if that actually happened. But I put it in the commercial going, geez. That was his first thought too. You just get free dinner at Rodizio Grill just for a 1929 arrow. You think that would be a lot more. Nah, they'll find it.

[B]

A dollar bill doesn't live as long as you might think. According to the Federal Reserve, each buck lasts about 7.2 years. Both the five and the $10 bill bills have shorter lifespans, just under six years. While the average for a hundred dollar bill lasts 24 years.

[A]

Really? I gotta interrupt. My wisdom this morning has created a little bit of an issue. Maybe it's not a good idea when I'm. I'm wise. Hang on. Because it makes you guys like, murderous. All my emails are coming in. They look like this. Says homebuyer, bringer of wisdom and priceless insight into the world of golden aged women who are not content with the natural agings in life. So much so they seek to condemn the practice of golden age men fornicating with women more than half their senior. That's just him pointing out my wisdom. Then he says, blasphemy. Such women of ill contempt should be Put to the sword like no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Not that one. Or go pay some young D. Get some young D. Ladies, golden girls, go buy it.

[B]

This 49 year old man on Tik Tok named Skip Boyce has launched a project called the Isolation Year. He's staying inside one room in his house without leaving unless it's an emergency for an entire year. He started back on January 10th so he's over three weeks into it. His 365 day challenge. He says the rules are simple. I do not leave the room and my live stream remains active 24 7. I don't bring in outside entertainment or unplanned interaction. I live, sleep, work out, read, write and spend my time here.

[A]

This is kind of like Jenny Cam from back in the day.

[B]

He's like he's doing it. This isn't about shock value. I wanted to create a controlled environment to step away from the constant stimulation re establish discipline, rebuild habits around health, focus and accountability. He lives in Utah. Used to own a construction business. Lives with a family. Although his kids are adults. His isolation room is partially separated from the rest of the house. And used his skills to build his own setup. He has a bathroom, a shower, a makeshift gym and an elaborate live streaming setup. Not allowed to have any unhealthy foods, especially drinks. No soda, no alcohol or drugs. He's working with a virtual trainer to get in shape. Yeah, he's apparently tasked with. Tasked his wife with providing him the food.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

A lot of people are warning him that the isolation to this degree is not healthy. But Skip says that he spent a couple of months preparing for this.

[A]

But he's isolated. You won't hear them say that.

[B]

Yep. Post a picture of. I checked out. The room's pretty decent sized room. But. Oh we.

[A]

How long? A year.

[B]

A year. 365 days.

[A]

It's hard for me to hear from people who tell. Tell me things aren't healthy and usually like it's like me. It's like they're holding the diet Coke while they do it or.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But.

[B]

But he's cutting himself off. But he's not. He's running a live stream.

[A]

Yeah, well, he's cutting himself off from them but he's showing them him. So he's presenting himself but cutting himself off from interaction.

[B]

And he'll, he'll lose some weight. He's got, he's got room to lose.

[A]

He's a fat guy.

[B]

He could lose 40 or 50, 60.

[A]

Jesus, Brady.

[B]

That's.

[A]

That's borderline for you 40 or 50 pounds overweight? Yeah, he could lose a pound or 40. It's a lot. It's a fifth grader, man. By the way, proud of myself again. Salesman David downstairs says, nope. Gonna get at least two calls from the principal today. Got the car. Take the littles to school. Had KUPD on as I was working as getting a Bluey song ready to play for them. My 9, 7 and 5 year old heard 5 seconds of your show and what they heard was you saying, now I've given you the answer and if you can put a finger up our butt from time to time. And then I turned it off. Well, they lost it. They've been repeating it minimum of 20, 20, 30 times before school and between the house and school. I tried to tell them to stop, but I was also laughing. So my Tuesday is ruined. Ruined. I'll talk to the principal. Yeah, you're getting a call because your kids are gonna be numbers with 9 year olds are through the roof. This podcast, we don't understand why your kids, all three of them, keep talking about fingers in their butts. Now, I'm a reporting agent. I have to tell the authorities that this is what's going on at your house. It's my fault that your kids want to talk about thumbs up their butts. Well, they were gonna do it anyway.

[B]

A team of researchers in Japan came up with a new type of headphones that track your brain waves and learn what gives you goosebumps. Then an AI builds playlists based on the results.

[A]

Travis Scott I'll get them goosebumps every time.

[B]

Yeah, they look like normal earbuds, but with tiny electrodes that track neurons. The AI decides if you're truly enjoying a song or just listening to listening to it casually. Once it learns that works, or what works, it pulls from thousands of songs to build a perfect goosebump heavy list. They say it worked best on musicians and people who describe themselves as being emotionally responsive to music.

[A]

Wouldn't this if you had a playlist of Goosebumps songs Make your bar for Goosebumps eventually go.

[B]

Go up or just. Or you get numb to it.

[A]

That's what. That's what I just said. Yeah. That means that all the songs that give you goosebumps will now mean that this is the static line for Goosebumps. I need something more.

[B]

But have you found that with a song that gives you goosebumps?

[A]

Sure, but I wouldn't listen to like 10 in a row that give me goosebumps like an opioid addict. Stop. Yeah, I Need more and more. You can never get back to that height again. So now the Goosebumps songs go away. Comfortably numb. Absolutely still a Goosebump song. But I do. I don't play it all the time because I know that that will make it a non. I love that song. I used to call them round the blockers when they'd come on you're almost home. You go around the block just to hear it instead of just driving right home.

[B]

But that's why you might have it. To give you the goosebumps. Sure.

[A]

But you got to keep them goosebumps special. You can't abuse it or it won't do it anymore.

[B]

McDonald's just announced a new limited run of McNugget Caviar, giving away tins of it next Tuesday at McNugget Caviar.com. but if you don't normally enjoy fish eggs, you won't like this either.

[A]

Hey, Brady. Hey. Making McDonald. Hi, it's Ralphie Mavery here for food Deuce.

[B]

How you doing, Freddie? Good.

[A]

It's good to see you again.

[B]

Really good.

[A]

Talk about that classy ass McDonald McNugget caviar. It's the real deal that's gonna make black people go crazy. Crazy.

[B]

Put it on a cracker, Ralphie. What do you do with it?

[A]

But anything on a crack. Crack is good. Speaking of how you do a toast. Yes, I put it on a crack. And no, dumbass, the story tells you put it on a McNugget. Finally, I don't have to eat like one of them hoity toity people at Belvedere's house. I get myself one of them McNuggets and dip it in the caviar like I've been doing all my life. Been called a pig for Keep talking.

[B]

It's normal caviar and a McNugget branded tea. They came up with the salty, savory taste that makes it a great dipping sauce. They are not pulling out idea out of nowhere. It blew up back in 2024, which, I don't know, Honey Mustard and Canada video went viral.

[A]

Blew up. Yeah, that's what I forget.

[B]

Rihanna was trying it. Oh, and she showed it shows her, like I said, going in there. It's got a pretty nice setup. Comes in a bag.

[A]

Black people don't love that. Like Ralphie says that get chicken McNuggets caviar. My God, Jay Z's gonna explode.

[B]

Each comes, each tin comes with a mother of pearl caviar spoon. 25 gift card for the nugs. I Could get this through the drive thru. Nope. You have to go online. McNugget Caviar dot com. And they'll take entry starting at nine o'. Clock.

[A]

What's gonna happen? They're gonna have like McDonald's 44. You get yourself some truffles on your french fries. Wait a minute. So you get a 25 gift card for the McNuggets. So you're buying the caviar and then you got to buy your nuggets.

[B]

That has. No. You sign up at the McNugget Caviar and only a limited amount of people will get this.

[A]

How much is it? 25 bucks.

[B]

25 bucks.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Well, you get a $25 gift card, but it's a chance to win starting.

[A]

Oh, okay. All right. So you're not buying it. It's a.

[B]

Okay. I'll be right back. I gotta go.

[A]

I gotta go get. Ralphie wants it. Ralphie's the first person I ever ate caviar with. I don't even know if he knew it was caviar. He's just eating just in front of us. How was it? I never had it. It's good. It's not.

[B]

It's salty.

[A]

It's got some salt. But if you eat it with the right stuff, like the. If you eat it with creme fresh.

[B]

It comes with that too.

[A]

Sometimes. Yeah. You have to have the proper. The Englishman next to me calls it a biscuit. If you don't have it on a proper biscuit, which is essentially a cracker. But they were thicker. It was almost like zwieback toast. Okay. Like the kid stuff. And then we ate it on that. It's crunchy and it killed the salt. If you have the right bread. Cuz I've had it. Just plain. Morning sickness. 98 Holmberg's morning sickness. But Ralphie was just piling in his. Gotta try this caviar. You gotta grow up. Homeburg. You gotta.

[B]

Someday you gotta grow up.

[A]

And we're at a line just crushing buckets to caviar. And it was good. It was in Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh caviar is like. That's how you know we were going to a Steeler game. We were in our Steeler gear eating caviar because that's what Steeler fans do. We're class sassy. Not eating churros. Cheese curds, Pig food. Caviar on sweet back toast.

[B]

Sneaker heads lost her mind over the weekend. I didn't see this. But there's a little secret collab that happened. Kirkland teamed up with Nike for the Costco dunks.

[A]

Nobody lost their minds.

[B]

Oh, yeah. They're one's on sale right now. They're asking five grand for form. Here's the. The shoe that came out hideous. The skateboard? Yeah.

[A]

No, it's got Kirkland written on this.

[B]

They're only available. They. They put them in the stores in New York, California, and Washington and Oregon. They're 134.99 mid.

[A]

They're already up all over eBay. Yeah.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

600 bucks. 605 and a quarter. They look like old Brooks shoes. Like the poor kids Brook shoes. Novelty.

[B]

We've got some new AI Supermodels. All right, can join twins.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

Valeria and Camilla are taking the Internet by storm. They. AI produced them. They rolled out. They've got 280,000 followers. Here's a. A quick, quick picture of them.

[A]

Oh, those are. Those. They're A.I. yeah. Because people are emailing me this picture of those two. Would you. And I'm like, I don't think that's real.

[B]

They're doing a backstory on them, like when they're kids. And now I'm showing them at. I. I saw a picture of them at the A Miami game wearing it.

[A]

Not the Heat. I saw that one, too. Somebody sent me that the other day.

[B]

You too?

[A]

And they're. They're stunning. Conjoined twins. Very rarely is a miserable birth defect attractive. Like, they very rarely come out hot. So I immediately thought, oh, this isn't real. People are fooled. AI is gonna. We're doomed. Because if you can't. If you can't get it in your head to question smoking hot Siamese twins that you're just now finding out about. Right. You don't understand how AI is going to dominate your life because these girls aren't pretty yesterday, but they just happened to show up after AI was invented. We'd have known about them a few years ago through Instagram and stuff. We'd have found out about real. So if you're just now seeing it, there'd be documentaries.

[B]

There'd be.

[A]

Yeah, like that Gracie Higgins, the girl that does the Paging doctor Beats emergencies. You know those things. And her dudes will say, let go. You do. I think she's real. Real. And I'm like, no, look again. Because there's like, here's my mom when I was nine with me. And here we are now, and they're making out and stuff. And nobody's like, that's not happening. For real. That's AI and they're ridiculous. And then they get Grandma in on it. Here's three generations of. And like, Stop it. That girl's so beautiful that we'd have heard about her before three years ago. She just showed up yesterday. Yesterday. That's AI. Siamese twins. Look, if you have to say those are Siamese twins, I would definitely. It's AI because have you seen Siamese twins? Very rarely are they like, wow, that one's gorgeous. The both of them. Come on. So don't email me that one anymore. But yeah, they're putting a backstory on it because dummies are like, I think it's activities. I think I can find door. Somebody said. You ever notice when Brady's got a story about food? You have every fact. You answer every question. The homework is done, the research is finished. Story about anything else, we're lucky if it gets to the headline. It's very true. You have to sign up for that. And then there's going to be a winner. It's a $25 gift card.

[B]

Comes with it.

[A]

And it's in a tin. A McNugget. You'll see when it comes out.

[B]

It's sweet.

[A]

Here's a crude drawing I made of it while I was talking. Talking. It's pretty accurate. All right. What do you got?

[B]

I got no.

[A]

All right. Oh, all right. One second. Let me find them. You could give us some of that Gracie Higgins in the meantime. All right. It's not normal and it's AI. And. And I highly recommend. I don't know what the page is called. Brady sent it to me. Pervert. Brady sent it to me. Check it out. She might be real. And then she's got pictures of herself. Like, here's the nerdy girl from high school. Like, she's still pretty cute. Here I am today and it's like, oh, my God. And tell me to go. Are you. No. To get on this here. Yeah. But Brady sent me this. So if you're saying. Where did John get all this perverted. It's not me. It was Brady. And I just happen to remember it. Yeah. Oh, God. It's just not human. And that's the only song she plays. She needs a goosebumps. This doctor beat. Emergency. Emergency. Aging doctor Beats. Go to the next video. Go to the next one, Rich.

[B]

Jesus.

[A]

Yeah, I know. She's a little different there. This is the first time you've seen these. You haven't seen Gracie yet.

[B]

Oh, wait. It's not going on the page.

[A]

No, it's not. But it's going on yours. It's frozen on yours. You must have gotten something on your keyboard. Oh, are you trying to get up there too? Maybe that's the problem. Both of you trying to jump on the screen. I'm not going to interrupt me. Just do it. Gracie Higgins. Brady. Brady's the one that. And tell your wife. Brady told me about her. I'm not.

[B]

What am I?

[A]

Why you mad at me?

[B]

Mother daughter.

[A]

Yeah, find the mother daughter one. Oh, I've not seen the bikinis. Do guys still like to go down petite girlfriend benefits? Being fun size unlocks many positions.

[B]

Our cherries are organic and bite sized.

[A]

And to make up for a lack of curves, we are extra freaky. Petite girlfriend. She's not real. Way too young there, though. She's not real. That looks creepy young, actually. Or is that out of style? Is that the right one? No, that's. That's. I think it's a different. Yeah, that's. Somebody's abusing this one. I think somebody's copying it. Maybe she's not real, though. Yeah, go get out of there and find another one. Yeah, the one that's actual. Like she's got two or three. Brady sent me a different one. You found them? It's her mother daughter one. Well, they're on there too. You found a more perverted one? Yeah, I don't know. Just. Just start. Stop. Stop at hig. We're just gonna stay here for a minute. I don't know which one it is. It's. Is that it? There it is. Which one? I think it's the bottom one. All right, maybe not.

[B]

No post.

[A]

No. I don't know. Somebody's stealing her name. That's Hagan's. Yeah, either way, we'll find it later. But yeah, that one's different.

[B]

I want maybe that one.

[A]

No, no, you'll find it eventually. Poor real Gracie Higgins, who's very pretty, but they turned her in an AI thing. Just. Here you go. You've got it. There it is. That's it. Fred has it on his phone. You don't. No, I have it on my. Brady text it to me. So if I ever look for it, that's how I got. I don't do. I don't have. Have like my own Instagram, so it just. Whenever I. Whenever somebody sends me an Instagram thing, I just scroll because I've got the KUPD one. That's the only reason I can look at videos. But I. They never go on it to find them. It's you. You idiots send me videos and then I start scrolling. I'm pulling up. Let me see it again. But I don't ever.

[B]

There's one posted yesterday where it's mom holding her when she's a baby.

[A]

And then they're familiar. Because every once in a while, while I go back to your text, I roll way back to your text. What does that today look like? Because I don't know how to. I'm too stupid and don't care about social media, so I don't ever go on like. I think she has a lot of different pages, but. Yeah, this is the one that Brady. This is the keeper. The. Paging Dr. Oh, good Lord. Yeah, this is Brady's gem. This is her doing all the Lord of the Ring characters. Oh, sweet. Right? What's this one? Grayson Hut. Pigs. Yeah. All right. That's not. Get off of that.

[B]

So talented.

[A]

Show this. Paging doctor. Beats emergency. Emergency usually. Right there. I'm done.

[B]

Their mom comes in.

[A]

Paging Dr. Larry knows it. Larry came.

[B]

Go to the.

[A]

Go to the one. Go. The one with two people. Richard, there's. There. Yeah, that one. One. That's her and her sister. Maybe. I don't know what they're trying to pull off. They're like, eight. Just. And now look at them. Now look at them together. It's just stupid.

[B]

What the.

[A]

Oh, my Lord. There's one with mom and her. Oh, here she is on another. I haven't seen this one on the mechanical pony at the. So this is the real one, or is this. No, there isn't a real one.

[B]

Okay. That's what I was wondering.

[A]

You said. You said somebody. No, there's people who are named Gracie. Oh, there. Go back and go to the middle one there. That's the one. Mom, Rich is bad at masturbating. I know. Yeah, that's the. There's the one. There's mom and her in 2008. And here they are today. Good Christ. Thank you, AI. Please don't be ugly. Please don't be ugly. Please. All right, I. Stop. Stop. Knock it off. Do the crazy one.

[B]

You said stay up it. I'm not.

[A]

I can't follow these.

[B]

Yeah, he's got nothing better than that. Dad. Dad was down there.

[A]

Oh, they show dad every once in a while. They do the thing where they do the. The. This is my mom, this is my dad, and this is me. There it is. This is like David Beckham. She has a different dad. And like, oh, she's making out with her dad. And then mom slaps. That's a new one. That's a new one. I haven't seen that one yet. There's her and mom dressed as Princess leia together in 2009. And here they are today, off lightsabers. You don't. Oh, my God. This. You started it.

[B]

I haven't seen that one.

[A]

Oh, you've seen them all. Is that the one with Grandma and the three? There's Grandma down there. Yeah, that one. Yeah. Yeah. Three generations. Maybe that's what Rachel looks like. Hey, look. Good for her. There they are. That's the one. The Incredibles are when they make out, they're dressed as the Incredibles, and then they start banging their boobs together, and then they go to kiss. It's so gross. So gross.

[B]

What the hell?

[A]

Why am I following this Grayson Higgs? I don't even know what following is. I wouldn't put it on the HMS page, but I. That's how I scroll. But it's because of you idiots. Him especially Brady. Especially because he'll go. Because it's in this room. Sure. Anything he does in this room, check it out. He'll send me a funny video, and then I'm like, all right. And then I start scrolling. Followed by Brett Vesli, of course. What? But I don't have. Maybe I should get an Instagram page. But I'm not gonna, because I can't imagine what I'd be doing. I just have one so I can watch the video.

[B]

Don't do it, Dewey.

[A]

No, I. I won't. I. I just have one so I can watch the videos. I don't want to get involved in any of that.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Jesus. What is that? She's peeing in her mouth. There's one. Oh, here, I'll jump over there. This is another one related to Grayson.

[B]

This is a Natasha Nastasia still.

[A]

Okay. Come on. I thought we had. Come on, we're at work, boys. Let's go. Come on. Oh, my Lord. Wow. Focus. Come on. Turn it off. That's enough. Well, it's only a podcast. Don't worry about. Yeah, that's right. Here's the podcast. We're allowed to do that. We'll put it up on our podcast video soon. Wow. Send me that link. Yeah. Get to Brett's videos. For crying out loud. Man, oh, man. Guy said, I googled Gracie Higgins. It took me right to Jerk, mate. Thanks. It took us all to that. Yeah, we all. You're gonna get there eventually. Get around it. All right, Go ahead, Brad. All right. A little street justice here for you. Oh, here's a Guy with us. Oh, they just hit him with up to the head. Big log. Right to the head. Now they're dragging him into the garbage, which is the whole country, pretty much. What a dump. Holy smokes. Hit a dude in the top of the head with a log. Oh, here's a motorcycle that goes into a fence. He didn't see the fence. And he wrote it right square and right into it. Wow.

[B]

Bomb size.

[A]

Thank you. These are fast. This one's for Brady. The boys sent this over for Brady. Emergency. Emergency. All right, this is a. We're working out, doing some. Oh, it's a pregnant lady doing burpees and smashing her belly into the ground. And then it comes out retarded. All right. That's fun. They sent that over.

[B]

I do that and I'd get. What are you.

[A]

Well, they sent it for you. Yeah, that was. He did say it was for you, But I did like that. I did like the burpees. Pregnant. That was not going to end well. I didn't picture the thing to be that disturbed. All right, all right. I don't know what's going on. We're in the snow. We've got a ring camera on somebody's patio. Here comes someone up there.

[B]

Snow walk.

[A]

Oh, he opens the door forward. A lovely man. And then. Whoa. Wow. Did the whole close call. He's gonna get like he would. Like, she saved his ass. Basically. He opened the door for a lady, and then when he walked two more steps, a window fell right where he was. Would have killed him had she not. Had he not been chivalrous. See, he holds the door for a lady, which takes two seconds off. And then a window from the second floor falls right where he would have been. That would have chopped him all up. Holy cow. All right, all right. Let's get to stuff we know. And we've got some. Not really, but that's cute. What is that? Is that. What is it? Somebody putting some sort of acid on the end of a micro penis that's coming. No, it's a hermaphrodite. So it's a penis where the lady button should be, and then there's a hole underneath. But the lady button is sort of a small penis. And then they're rubbing some sort of elixir on it and moistening it. But it's.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

What in the world am I looking at? I don't know. That's what I was trying to figure out.

[B]

That's like.

[A]

Gives China a run for her money. I don't know what that means. I Wish it was pixelated.

[B]

That WWE restaurant.

[A]

Oh, China. That China. I thought you meant the whole country.

[B]

Oh, no, no.

[A]

I kind of thought the same. I don't know what they're putting on there. All right, turn that off. Wow.

[B]

All right.

[A]

And then we'll just end with this one. All right. Oh, it's a. Somebody's got a big white leaner in a watermelon. But practicing safe sex. That guy has a condom on. Yeah, he's cut out a watermelon and he's banging it. And then he put a camera to the side and he finishes. He's finished in the watermelon. We hate the watermelon. That's what we got. I'm not gonna lie. That made me curious. You gonna try watermelon? I think it might feel. You get that rind shape down around the edge so there's no rough spots.

[B]

Oh, yeah, you gotta. You gotta.

[A]

What is that?

[B]

Miter it.

[A]

You gotta.

[B]

Do the edges.

[A]

Yeah, you can't have sharp corners. All right, well, there you go. What a day. All right, that's enough. There's your brady Report, everybody. It's 98 Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. Easy said, fully erect. Still streaming. Homberg's morning sickness [e-mail]. That's right, Brady. We skipped it yesterday for Brady Gro. But that doesn't mean we can skip it. These people need you. It's now time for the most moral man in all of Phoenix to. To solve your weird dilemmas. It's called what Would Brady Do? And it's brought to you by our friends over at mo Money Pond. MMP guns right there on 12th street in Indian School. And I want to say thank you to them because they're a big part of what we're up to on Sunday at Copper Blues in Phoenix for the Super Bowl. We're going to have a. Well, a Super Sunday party. We're going to call it Super Sunday Party and come down and watch the game with us at Copper Blues, downtown Phoenix. And why do I bring Mo Money, Pun and MP guns into this? Well, it's because they're giving us all sorts of things to give away, including 150 gift card, two mo money pawn and MMP guns. And keep in mind, you can get tools, TVs, video games. I still got to go down there and get that Joe Green. I know I'm bad about it. You get, you know, that kind of stuff, nostalgic stuff, guns, things for you, sneakers. We got a bunch of. We got Gift cards from them and they're helping us out. So thank you to Mo Money Pawn. MMP Guns. Yeah, the sneakers. Oh, oh. Last time I was in there, they had a pair that was a half size short. For me. It was a pair. I think it was a pair of Kyrie. No, it was a. They were Jordans. They were Jordan ones. Oh, they were so neat. I'm looking for a pair of Kyries I saw the other night. I have to have. Tell Byron. He'll find them for you. Well, I don't know what they're called. I gotta figure it out. I got a lot of laces. Big fan. Saw a girl wearing them and I was like, almost wrestled her to the ground and stole her shoes like it was 1980. So cool. Mo money pawn. MMP guns. $150 gift card right there from them. And they're helping us out at Copper Blues on Sunday. You should come on down. It's all to help the Humane Society. Not only is MMP Guns and Mo Money Pawn involved, Prestige Billiards is given a whole arcade system away. Action Ride Shop. Talked to Josh yesterday. Got a capita snowboard. We're gonna give away $300 carpet cleaning from Zerorez. That's a new part of it. New mattress from Boring Mattress. Hundred dollar gift basket from raising cane. 200 gift card to Crazy Girls Cabaret. That includes lap dances. So you watch super bowl, you go over to Crazy Girls. Thousands of dollars in gift cards and it's just going to be a hat with whatever your prize is. The football pool. You get in on that and you come by whenever I say. All right, let's take a look at the score and give something away.

[B]

Pull them out of the johnny hat.

[A]

Every time there's a score, I'll change the johnny hat and we'll make it work. And if you've got a win, when the score changes and the and the quarter order ends, that way somebody might win every time. If it just stays 7 nothing or 1710 and you're cruising, you're cruising. You're gonna walk away with a ton of stuff. Good chance a lot of people walk out of there with thousands of dollars and prizes. Could be like a great game show win. Anyway. Super Bowl Sunday. I don't even think we're allowed to call it that, but come get me. Coppers at Copper Blues podcast. They can't chase us. That's true. It's a podcast. Doesn't count anymore. Got no room.

[B]

Big game Sunday party.

[A]

Big game Sunday afternoon. Super party with bowls of Food. Brady, are you ready?

[B]

Ready.

[A]

Says Brady. I'm thinking about going to Men's Health for testosterone or pills for my PP. I'm 43 and I've noticed that my erections are only like half of my wean. Now the middle gets really good, but it's not all the way to the end like it used to be be. I'm a stuffer and my wife said something about it. Now I'm 6 3, 310 pounds. And I know losing weight would help, but my life, my wife says she likes me this size. Does the PP pill or testosterone work? I'm nervous. It's going to kill me.

[B]

Brian, go to game day Mental health. Yeah. They.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You don't have to have pills. Talk with the.

[A]

They have creams, medical doctor creams, nasal spray rays.

[B]

Yeah, it's amazing what they do.

[A]

But I will say this, if your PP is only getting half hard, you got a blood flow problem and that means that you're. It's working. But you've got a blood pressure issue. So you might not be able to take the PP pills because check with your doctor's got you and make sure. But yeah, I mean you're gonna. Your wife has to either decide that you're going to be healthy or she likes you. £310. And I'll tell you this, there aren't a whole lot of 310 pound dudes in their 50s. Just saying, you're kind of gonna be an outlier. So maybe start. If your penis is starting to warn you. You know Captain Kirk's chair is empty.

[B]

Affected by the medication. Yeah.

[A]

Well, beyond the medication, let's start working on the idea that you need to kind of bring her down a little bit and then your penis might start getting harder on its own and testosterone and stuff like that will help. But your wife has to decide whether or not she wants you three pounds and sexy or dead. Depends on your insurance policy probably. And then there's that. What are you leaving her? Did you go to another one of our sponsors? You go to Trajan, get an estate plan and she's like, you stay fat. I'm happy with that. Any woman that tells me I like you wildly overweight, do you now? She should care about you more. She might be attracted to you big, but the A, she's keeping you from other women. B, she's putting you on the fast track to getting all the stuff. But yeah, Brady's right, Game day will take care of that. If your PP's not getting hard Enough. Here's Melanie says, Dear Brady, my wife is asking to bring a girl into the bedroom to spice things up. She wants me though to go out and find a girl at a bar or somewhere. She won't let me use the Internet because she thinks I'll pay for for it. Have you been to a bar lately? I spent the whole weekend out in Scottsdale. It's just Instagram. People filming themselves and not talking to each other. It's awful. Where should a 42 year old man go to get chicks? Where would Brady go if he had this option at home? We're looking for an attractive girl in her 20s, 30s, even 40s if she's interested. I don't know how to get chicks anymore at all. Lance, where would.

[B]

Well, you know where I feel on this?

[A]

The tap dragon always.

[B]

No, I am not comfortable with that situation.

[A]

You don't?

[B]

I always think of Admiral Akbar.

[A]

It's a trap.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why it's a trap if your wife is saying it, going out and find somebody. I agree, Brady, but if your wife says to you go get a girl.

[B]

And you come back with one, that's just me.

[A]

Yeah, but you can turn the trap.

[B]

On her guys are on the same page and you're completely comfortable. Comfortable. Where did you find women to begin with?

[A]

Well, you don't do different bars anymore.

[B]

Go to activities that you.

[A]

I think it's gonna park. I think it's gonna be a case. Like he's saying, I don't trust him. Because she's gonna be like, oh, so that's what you want, huh?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So what then? Because she. Because it's starting an S storm, then sure, if the s storm will lead to the end of your world and then you realize she's end of your marriage too. So. No, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying what happens is any woman says go buy a car and you come back with a car and she's mad about it. It run depends on how bad.

[B]

You think. If she wanted to bring someone else in the she would pick it out.

[A]

Well, no, she's pick. She's letting you do it and she made it out loud. This isn't a trap. This is a thing you can spin back.

[B]

I think if you're gonna do that, something like that, you're doing that as a couple.

[A]

You think? Yeah, I think she wants you to be a viable man again. And she doesn't want to be a couple. She wants you to go fishing and come back with fish. Making it part of the give it A shot? Yeah.

[B]

It.

[A]

It's something I would try if I was given that line. You go out and you go. But if she turns it on you later, you're like, I'm fine. I can still get women. She's basically sending you out to the wolves. You know, with the wolves. Wolves. And you come back with a kill. And then she says, oh, you did it. All you have to know in your brain is, oh, I can still kill. She just sent me out to prove I'm still. And you're gonna come back beaming with confidence if you got one. And then she. It. This isn't a trap.

[B]

That's.

[A]

That's the dumbest trap ever. Okay?

[B]

The reason why I wouldn't do it either is because I wouldn't ask her to do it.

[A]

Well, yeah, but you're not into that. You wouldn't tell Ronnie to go out and find some d. No dude's gonna do that. But a woman sometimes says, hey, Rod's been crazy. Crazy. They are. That's what I'm saying. But I'm telling you right now that if you and Ronnie are out at dinner and she turns to you and says, go get that girl at the bar. We're gonna take her home.

[B]

Well, we're doing that as a couple.

[A]

No, no, she's just saying, you go do that. I'll sit here at the table, get her to our house. You would go, it's a trap. You would. You wouldn't even consider that in a playful way. She's got her foot under the table between your legs. She's doing dirty stuff.

[B]

I guess we're almost. We're almost 20 years into this deal. Maybe she wants to change things up. Okay.

[A]

Yeah. But very convincing on that. Sure. But if it's like, if you have a little dull sex thing going on or you're not doing it that much or whatever, I don't know your situation.

[B]

Because it's a double. It's a. It's a double whammy. Because not only you going to, you know, picking up the girl or hitting off with his one thing, but saying, well, I want to bring you back to my lair with my wife. Yeah, that's a tall order.

[A]

Sure it is. But if you can pull it off, you're going to feel like a God, and she's going to know she's married to a God. Some chicks like that. I have a friend who's got 100.

[B]

Bucks if you come back.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I.

[B]

And we won't go through.

[A]

Why wouldn't we go through with it.

[B]

Because then I'll put.

[A]

You know what?

[B]

I'm not doing this.

[A]

What are you crazy?

[B]

I love my wife.

[A]

Of course you do. She's the one who asked you to do it. That's why you're doing it for her. What's the matter with you? You can't just go back to the. You can't just come home with fish. And she's like, where have you been? In.

[B]

Get out of here.

[A]

Fishing. I don't want any fish. Like, that's dumb. But if she goes. Go get some fish and you come back with fish, she can't be mad. And if she is, she's insane. Let her be insane somewhere else. They all are. I know, but there you go. Let her. Let her reveal herself.

[B]

You bring home the fish you like, and she's like, I don't like that.

[A]

So what? You didn't.

[B]

You should know better than that.

[A]

No, you didn't. Look, you give me permit. You tell me right now, go find an exact replica of me and let's have him on the air. And then you get mad that I did do it. Be like, you're an idiot. I'm not going to listen to you. You're crazy. And let them be crazy out loud. If they want to reveal themselves as nuts, that's fine. Put the spotlight on that. You get this opportunity, you jump on it. You can't do it on your own. But if you get the green light, sure, it might get a little awkward, but she wants you to be a relevant hunter. She wants you to go out and hunt again and prove you can kill. And you come back with a deer in your mouth.

[B]

You think that's what she means with that?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

You don't.

[B]

We agree to disag.

[A]

What do you think she means with it?

[B]

I don't think there's any. I. I just. Well, if she does mean that, that's. No.

[A]

What do you think she means with it?

[B]

But then on the same side, if you don't do that.

[A]

No, we're not talking about that. What do you think she means with it? You said what I said she doesn't mean. What do you think she means? What do you think the wife.

[B]

I don't know. It could mean all sorts of things. Maybe it does mean that.

[A]

It means exactly what I'm saying.

[B]

Maybe it means that she wants to see if you're looking to more or less kind of stray from the relationship.

[A]

Or want to, you know, she's telling you to. Green light. It's like Real. And make sure. Just go. Are you sure you want to do this? Because I'll do it. I'm a hunter. I can hunt and gather. I bet you can't. It's that episode of Curb youb Enthusiasm where he's. He had that girl at work, and he goes, I think she's coming on to me. And his wife's like, you can't pull women anymore. And he goes, yes, I can. She goes, go ahead, try. I guarantee you're going to strike out because you giving me permission to do this, I'll do it. She goes, go nuts. You're gonna fail. And he got all the way to, like, the couch, and the lady was actually going to do it. And he couldn't get hard because that's all he needed to do was prove it. And she had a hunter. Women like when you're a hunter, they just don't like you actively hunting on weekends that they don't know you're hunting. Matthiah tells you to go hunting, you're coming back with, like, a deer. I know. You go out and get us one. Brett rubbing on your, like, right there on the couch. Let's get a third one, huh? Go hunting. I'll be right back. And some girl who looks like Cosby got hold of her. Just drag her through the front door. How'd we do? I didn't say roadkill. You're bananas. So you wouldn't go. You wouldn't do this. You're telling this guy don't do it. That's what Brady would do.

[B]

He'd tell us what I would do. He'd do what he can meet.

[A]

No, that's what. That's what he's asking. Yeah, I wouldn't do it. You'd say no, I need an adult. Stop asking me this stuff.

[B]

Probably wouldn't do it like that.

[A]

What would you say to Ronnie makes that suggestion? What do you say?

[B]

I don't like that. I don't like the idea.

[A]

You don't want to spice it up.

[B]

Yeah, we can. I think we can spice it up.

[A]

With you and I. I really want to watch you with someone else. I think it's hot.

[B]

What happened to you?

[A]

Where's Ron? I don't know. I don't know, but it's hot and I want to see it. It's a new thing. I'm thinking about too much.

[B]

Well, then, okay, I'll do it.

[A]

See, I even. I can sexy talk you into it. She's gonna do it in a second. One boob comes out. I Want to see you on top of another. She starts rubbing her cans together. Oh, it's getting me so hot now. Bye.

[B]

Well, if you.

[A]

And there goes Lincoln every driving down the road at stoplights, we'll come over and have sex with my wife and I. Perfect. Okay. Thanks.

[B]

It's a numbers game.

[A]

See, I sexy talked you into saying okay. Imagine Ronnie's in the shower. Comes out all glistening and wet, rubbing lotion on. Go get another girl. I want to watch you. I want to watch my man pounds at me. Yeah, you. Oh, it's so hot you do it.

[B]

So I do think that means, like, look at him.

[A]

He's half hard. Me doing it.

[B]

No. If I would again, it's double standard.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because if she's like, okay, I want that, but I wouldn't want her.

[A]

Of course not. She's not asking for that.

[B]

Well, what if it came back around?

[A]

No, you had yours.

[B]

That's my thought.

[A]

Then say no. Like, then say no.

[B]

You have no right to say no.

[A]

You have every right to say no. You're not comfortable with the opposite. Stand your ground. Doesn't mean just because one thing happened, you have to do the other.

[B]

I allowed you to do.

[A]

That's right. And I'm not comfortable. It's not a trap. Maybe she says that and just say. Well, that's where you're okay with it and I'm not. I liked your way. I don't like the other way. I'm insecure with it and it doesn't.

[B]

Friction. There would be friction.

[A]

If we're trying to excite ourselves, we both have to be on the same page. I'm not on that page. I was more than happy on your page. Now you can say it. When she starts in with the. The caressing of the breasts and asking you to go get one, just say. Just know. Lay down the law. I'm not doing this the opposite way. I don't want some second wiener in here. You know that, right?

[B]

Make sure you clarify. Absolutely. Absolutely.

[A]

And then get in your car and do like Brady did. He got sexy turned on by me. Well, I guess we're gonna do it then. Dear Brady, when a man of size such as yourself looks in the mirror nude, what do you do to be okay with it? I, a man of size myself, am so depressed. When I look in the mirror, I feel terrible. I'm 90 pounds overweight. I'm miserable. And I always admire a confident big man because let's face face it. Neither of us are going to do anything about this. Help me like this Giant cavern I live in. Be wise and thoughtful. Please, Wesley. Unless he's a big boy, unlike being a big boy. But he's not doing anything about it, I guess.

[B]

I mean, if you don't have the confidence, then, you know, you are empowered to do something about it. I mean, as far as.

[A]

But how do you. In the morning, like he asked you, when you get up and you are standing there naked in the morning mirror and you say, that's great, or, I'm not happy with it, but it is what it is. I mean, what is your empowering moment to say, this doesn't bother me, or, I'm totally comfortable in my own skin?

[B]

Well, I'm not trying to put on any more weight. I'm trying to lose a little more weight.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Right now. So I'm more or less trying to do something about. Trying to be a little more sensitive, sensible.

[A]

But how do you stay the rate.

[B]

That I was going? This is not. You know, actually, it was the same throughout the way, but I don't.

[A]

But Wesley's depressed, and here you're not. Right. How? Like, what about you? Like, I can. This is no big deal.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He's not looking to change.

[B]

Well, yeah.

[A]

He basically admits I'm fat and I'm staying.

[B]

You know, why is. I think probably what helps me is that I know I still can do a lot of the stuff.

[A]

Stuff.

[B]

Not like I was as far as competing in sports. That helps me.

[A]

Being active.

[B]

Being active. Being coordinated stuff. Being better than average in certain things.

[A]

So getting out, doing stuff, and recognizing.

[B]

Yeah. Be active. That helps.

[A]

Wesley's gigantic blob, like, body shouldn't hold him back from things he loves to do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If.

[B]

If you. If you can't do things, that needs to be a motivation.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Saying, I gotta stop.

[A]

Or, you know, but what if what he likes to do is swim or play in pools? Taking a shirt off, the hard part.

[B]

Well, you can at first, you know, you can swim in pools. It just.

[A]

It's fine.

[B]

You. You're not alone in that area. Just keep your shoulders below. Yeah.

[A]

Put a T shirt on.

[B]

Welcome to America.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. You're not alone.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Go to a public pool and just go, jesus, I'm not that bad.

[B]

There's a lot of people that are, you know, there's people bigger than you that are doing stuff.

[A]

Sure. But it isn't about doing stuff. It's about being comfortable at your own house, looking in the mirror, going, how do I. How do I embrace this? Yeah.

[B]

I still, you know, it's not like I'm going around flaunting myself. It's not like I'm no Bert Kreischer. Taking your shirt off and.

[A]

Well, that's the thing, though. There's a confidence in just being.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Just accepting what you. You are. I'm just obese. Well, so be it. Big deal. Like you said, I'm not alone. Big deal. I have a friend named Anthony Puglisi and he takes his shirt off at pools and no one knows why or how he gets away with it, but he's still confident. He's super confident with it. It's amazing.

[B]

Shocks all of us, but if you were Anthony. If you were Anthony, you wouldn't do Kill myself.

[A]

I mean, come on, we got pictures of it. It's just brutal. But, yeah, you know, I don't know. Everybody, every. Here's the thing, Wesley. Everybody looks in the mirror and goes, this isn't good enough. Everyone, everyone. Somebody's got a goofy ear or, you know, something that you've got a scar you don't like. I've got plenty of stuff I don't like. But you just have to accept that that's who you are and that's what you are. And if you're not going to change.

[B]

It and do that, that helps you. You.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Around other people, that confidence is.

[A]

Confidence is a monster. But you have to. If you're not going to change your fat, you have to accept that that's what you've. You've chosen and that's who you are. And then you present that to the world. The best way forward, you got to be able to present it to yourself first. I would say try to lose some weight because you're depressed. And if it's the weight that's doing it, why are you saying, I'll keep that? That's what crazy women do. They have a problem, they won't solve it, and it stays a problem forever. So solve your problem. These people. Yeah, it's always fun. Like Bert Chrysler taking his shirt off. And people are like, oh, you know what it is?

[B]

Look what happened, what he did. He got into the fitness thing big time.

[A]

But it's not.

[B]

He dropped some.

[A]

It's not confidence. It's a defense mechanism. Him, he makes the fat funny so no one can laugh at him. He's laughing, too.

[B]

He's got a new Netflix series.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it deals with that.

[A]

Yeah. But if you're fat, Wesley, take your shirt off board and make jokes about how fat you are. Ralphie was a big fat guy and he Would often show everybody what was going on under there and everybody. But that was his deflection. It's like I'm using it as a weapon against you. Be funny about being fat. Don't be depressed. Because if you're fat and funny people that better. But you're not funny and you're fat. Chris Farley too. Chris Farley. It was a defense mechanism anyway. And if your wife asks you to go out and get a chick at the house, you're going to have to go down to like a Lo's Chicken and Waffles. Get one of them big girls. I go home with you and your wife. You got a king size. We going to need cow king. You might need a new futon. Bust up some of that pure one your pounds. There you go. Nice job. Ready? You. You wouldn't have a threesome.

[B]

Some dilemmas.

[A]

Not going to lose weight. And you want that guy to get a hard on. This is nice. But I talked. You saw it right here on this show. You watched me pretending to be a sexy woman. Convince Brady to go get a chick at a bar. And he did it. It would be really easy. Ronnie. Rub them together and make it happen. It's 98K, you Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. 98 Kubt still streaming Homberg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com. Africa Bamba and the solo sonic force. There are a few people right now going, wait, that's a remake. They definitely made it their own. So they didn't do the popping rockin socket with the side of hip hop. Well, there's six, seven members. Jesus Christ. And a lot of it. I don't know if they did the popping rocking, locking with the side of hip. Because was hip hop even a thing? I think it was by at that point. That's interesting.

[B]

Sugar Hill Gang brought in hip determin.

[A]

Yeah. But was it maybe. Huh? Trying to skip through here. Yeah. I can't. How about that? How about that? Who knew? Definitely a better version. Yeah. With rage. Interesting.

[B]

Got a little more anger in it.

[A]

Yeah. But I mean always feel like that they're. They modernized it because they wrapped the popping rocking soccer with the side of hip hop. We're going there ain't no stopping. Anyway. It's a fun song and that guitar work is incredible in that. Anyway. Just a little flash. Some of you didn't know that's a remake. There you go. If you want to hear the original, you're wasting your time. It's almost like blinded by the light. When you hear the Springsteen version, you're like, what a pile of garbage. This is a man for man. Man for man Killed it. Made it a song that's tolerable. Ripped up like these. He doesn't even do it anywhere near close. It's awful. All along the Watchtower. Clearly a winner there. Timothy Chalamet sucks. And then Jimi Hendrix did it. It was great. Bob Dylan doing things. It's like a homeless guy yelling at you and you have your windows down at a stoplight. Just shut up. Why? Are you famous? Well then keep it on paper and let other people sing it. This is awesome.

[B]

Napkins.

[A]

All right. Sh. I wish you were Stephen Hawking. Your tolerable voice then. Proof he's not talented. To all Bob Dylan fans. Go watch. We Are the World. In a room full of talented people. They had to isolate him because he couldn't sing one line. No. No one knows what you're doing. I don't think I fit in. You don't? You don't because all these people are talented musicians. You're terrible at this. Good Christ. Do we have to include them? Bob Dylan. Then they make a movie about him. Timothee Chalamet wins awards because he sang like him. Everybody cannot sing. It's easy. Thanks. Thanks a lot. Boom hour. It's 9:30. It's time for your hot releases. They are upon us as we speak. The things that come out this week that are perhaps to your liking on tv, movies. They got some other stuff in there. Music for sure. Toledo will start with you. What's out on the streaming services this week pique my interest.

[B]

The big thing that you really don't.

[A]

Need a trailer for is the Winter Olympics opening ceremonies on Friday. That this week? Yep, on Friday. And then the. I think the first competition's open. Are underway already. What? And then the major competitions get going.

[B]

On Sunday, but on ABC and Disney. Plus Seth Rogen, I think is behind this remake of the Muppet Show.

[A]

I'll say it right now. Don't like the new Kermit voice. Yeah, I agree there. Not right. Oh, Rolf playing this whole time. Well, what'd you think it was some kind of sentimental montage in your head? You're doing the show again, Frank.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

Oh my God, it's you. You're my idol. You're sweet. Should have had Mahomes do the voice. I grew up watching you. My parents grew up watching you. Asked me to do the Voice. I said I would, but then they took away from it. They Thought I'd be in the super bowl in this thing because I'm not. So what are you gonna do? And then is maybe starting again. Depending on how tonight goes. I've been burned before. It's a lumpit, Joe.

[B]

And it starts right now.

[A]

Maybe we're a little rusty. I like it. They're up there. They're in it. You can watch it tomorrow. Disney plus abc.

[B]

And then I believe Thursday you can start watching it on who?

[A]

I mean, it's an identical set. So what they did was nostalgia plus. Yep. Which is great.

[B]

Glitter and Gold is a three part docu series about the ice dancing competition. Winter dancing.

[A]

Very sexy. Yeah, we know. You can still call it ice dancing. You don't have to be political. You're right. You know, maybe just in case bad Bony did say ice out. I don't think the. The freezy cubes and rinks. Winter rinks, they call them. Going into these Olympics. Maddie and Evan. They're the favorite. Evan and have been skating together for 14 years. Remember Tanith Balbo?

[B]

Tanith Belbin.

[A]

Belbin, that's right.

[B]

That was your.

[A]

Your go to. She was my first two Olympics in a row. She was my first do. A Canadian. Now she does the play by play. Did I get them? You tried to get them on the air. Now what face are you going to do? Hey, we have battled Maddie and Evan our entire careers. Maddie and Evan and Piper and Paul have been waiting for this moment. Now it's. I think I can watch that. That looks ultimately gay. I think that is very gay. If you take. If you're a man by yourself. And I know the football's gone and stuff. So Thursday night you got nothing to do and you plop down and watch the ice dancing. Doc, you're going to come out of that with a wiener in your hand. You'll be listening to Izzy tomorrow morning. Yeah. It won't be yours.

[B]

All right. On Netflix, the Lincoln Lawyer season four debuts.

[A]

Yes, John, your Bob Dylan impression sounds like Johnny 5. Johnny 5 alive. Disassemble, Stephanie, reassemble. What is this? Lincoln Lawyer Season 4.

[B]

And you can start streaming this on Thursday.

[A]

I kind of want to choke him. I know that guy. First couple seasons were pretty good. Murdered. I haven't seen the show. I didn't like the movie. One thing I've learned working for you is things can always get worse. I don't. I'm law. Shows have to be something different. All right, how about the Queen of Chess?

[B]

On Netflix. A Hungarian girl dreams of conquering the.

[A]

Male dominated World of International Chess is a docu series, not a movie.

[B]

After a 15 year battle against World champion Gary Kasparov, Judith Polgar revolutionized the sport's patriarchal culture to become one of the greatest chess prodigies in history.

[A]

She started beating dudes in Russia. I couldn't like that.

[B]

I don't know if this is what the Queen's Gambit's based on, but I.

[A]

Would assume she disappeared everybody. Did they kill her? No, that's her talking. I want a terrible chess player that settles in. I'm not watching TV this week. Yeah, no kidding. I think I'd rather watch much ice dancing than a chess documentary.

[B]

You got the.

[A]

You got the Olympics.

[B]

And that's about it this week.

[A]

Tonight on Netflix. Drying paint. 12 painters compete to see who can dry their paint the fastest. And you watch. Can they take down the champion who dries very fast? Well, he's the Jason Statham of paint. My paint dries very fast. Did you say it dry drives fast? No, it dries fast, as in gets dry to the touch. I'm Jason Statham, the fastest. Yeah, I paint now for Crylon.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

For cry along, I'm Jason. State of no runs, no drips, no errors, mate. What do you paint? Everything.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Put in front of me. I'll paint it. All right. Like the Rolling Stones. I want to paint it black, but mine dries faster. I drive very fast, like Toledo's wife. Very dramatic. Dry very fast. That's a little Jason Stalham joke in there. You like it? All right, we'll make John dry with this one. New Lady Gaga. Oh, no. Go get a butter knife. I'm going to cut my wang off. Oh, this is her. Brady was playing this in the office the other day like he's trying to over make too much emotion on a Mr. Roger document. It's a neighborly day in this beauty. Calm down about yourself. Some like stuff in it. Yeah, it's Mr. Roger's song. Simplicity is the key. We don't need it to be.

[B]

Can we just let that be what it is?

[A]

Thank you. We should. No, she's got to make it her emotional.

[B]

Understand? I don't understand taking that one.

[A]

Yeah. All right. This got released like two hours ago. It's Marilyn Manson's video for Unreal. Oh, cool. Kirsty probably got a lot. New Maryland man. That's the problem. Produces his stuff. That is. Got a little Ramstein type thing to it, though. Plastic halos caught in faith. Manufactured gills in bulk. Everybody wants a savior that won't Ask them to look. Maryland's home S Gets better Lightning when the camera intervene reality. I like this. I think tomorrow's Wake up song has been chosen. Comfort is the Love doesn't sell well enough. I'm sorry about that. My fault. But I want. That's good, Maryland man. New ones. What's it called? Put that in a picture Real. All right. We go over to the Our car friends over there and get our stereos upgraded and blast that one. Great. God, here's Kid Rock. This one got released seven days ago. Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch. What?

[B]

There's a remake?

[A]

Please tell me I'm not going to turn this up and hear what I think I'm going to hear. Sure enough.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

This is a Duncan Hines commercial too. I don't think it's AI because I went there wasn't Amazon on Linked for it, so. But if it is, it can't be real. You bring up a great point, though.

[B]

Hey, here's something new from so and so. Is it real or is it.

[A]

I went on Amazon and there's a link for it to buy the song. So is it bad that I like it? It's Duncan H. And nobody else.

[B]

Is it on his official page?

[A]

I'm weaker than Master Michael McDonald Black. I can't do it can't get higher. I like it. This I shouldn't, but I do. Is he gonna do this for the alternate halftime show? The Ice Out. I like this, so I don't.

[B]

That one.

[A]

I can't tell if it's AI or not, but it wasn't like to buy it, so whatever. All right, all right. I got a bit of. Listen to that on the car Home with Marilyn Manson. I will turn the radio down at stoplights. I don't want to look like a loon. Just make sure Mark's with you. You'll be fine. No, that's true. Steppy's in the car with me. We'll drive around. Here's new seven Dust. Oh, is this the real you? High Bar, you've said already this is a good day. Yeah, so far. I'm a 7 Dust fan again. I'm going through a thing with him right now. Must be something. What? We got something. It could be something, but I'm sure we're gonna win. How long? I like this, too. Is this the real you? Is this the real you? Is this the real you? Head's in the clouds, you don't know where to. I don't know where I could fail. All right, there's seven Dust. New one Kind of petered out a little bit at the chorus, but it was Toledo. Oh, good.

[B]

You got about five minutes.

[A]

Plenty of time. All right, here's new rock from Bush. I'm here to save your life won me over last year when I went to the Bush concert with Shiny. Year before when I seen him, they was not good, man. They were great. Jerry Cantrell and Candle Box, they were the worst. Okay. But it was the end of the tour, so his voice was pretty shot. They were so good on the one. This is the tour I watched him on. What's the video shown? This is out now. Yeah, this got released three days ago. So the Alpha's out right now. I can lonely.

[B]

This.

[A]

Car is coming. This is solid. I wish I as good as I tried bridge.

[B]

I wish I felt more alive.

[A]

Tell me where the world things are Few would kill him.

[B]

Great.

[A]

Nice job. Another one. What in the what? All right, let's go to one of our AI songs. Not a new song, and it's not AI it showed up on my YouTube playlist. The kid Rock, Sugar Pie. It got released a couple, like, seven days ago. That's right. Did it? Did it? Yeah. So.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

There you go. Here's an AI song for you. Oh, my God. I can't play this. It's called. Called My Esser Gapes tonight. All right, well, I'll try to beep it best I can. Nordic Abba style, 80s theme.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

My pooper gapes tonight. For you, my love I moan and he earn I'm begging for the pleasure I my gates tonight you're holding the key Everything feels right Give me rectal ecstasy my tonight you're holding the key Everything feels right Give me ecstasy. That's nice to play that for your mom for Valentine's Day. She'll love. She'll love the new modern music. Let's do this. I know how much you love Dio, but here's Holy Diver in Seoul. Is he singing? Nope. Holy Diver by Dio. The soul version. Maran. Nothing better. Love soul music. It's already the best version of this. Clean. Oh, don't you see what I mean? Got to get away. Holy Divers. Come on. All right. That's spectacular. Holy Diver soul editions. And that'll bring us to N word of the F word, the game that is sweeping the nation. And today we have Daz Dillinger featuring E40 and Karina. Corrupt. This is getting money, man. I got it.

[B]

So Daz Dillinger.

[A]

I'll go hardcore. N word, hard N word, mean. Angry. Yeah, I Think. Was it me last or Brady? All right, go ahead, Brady.

[B]

I'll go with the friendly N word.

[A]

All right. I'll go with the F word. Here we go. All right. Yeah. What's up? This rough young Gotti. I just left volcano re upped on the pills. I got the blue devils. I'm with my high powered. That's a very friendly, friendly high powered N word he was giving. That was nice. He say white power n words. Oh, okay. High power. Good one there. Yeah, Brady got that one. Well done. That's how he said white tower n words. And I'm like, wow. I would like to meet that. There you go. All right. Well, there it is. Those, my friends, are your hot releases. It's 98 Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. Still streaming. Hberg's morning sickness online at 98 KU. All right, let's get the hell out of here, shall we? It's 9:58. Is that a Twix? Sorry, I'm still chewing. I am terrible. I'm listening. Hello, Seattle. I'm listening. Hello, twigs. I'm chewing. It is 9:58. That means it's time for the entertainment drill. And that, my friends, is brought to you by my friend, Dr. J. Schwartz. The Schwartz laser eye Center. Getting eyeballs fixed for years on end is the best in the business. They've been doing it for so long, they get the technology before anybody else because they just know what they're doing. All this new stuff. Talking to Tripp about his thing, oh, my God, I didn't even understand it. And I just had my eye done a couple of years ago, and mine was like the most cutting edge thing and it works great. Now there's this. Oh, they can tweet. Listen to this lens replacement where they can go in after words if your vision gets a little off and tweak it like they do glasses with like a. I don't know if it's a red light or something. I don't know. Don't take my grinder to it. Yeah, you got a guy in there with a welding mask. Harbor freight got my tool.

[B]

Let's go.

[A]

He like, there's like a light that's amazing. And it changes the organic nature of the lens they put in. And it's responsive to. It's unbelievable. The technology is incredible. Schwartz laser eye Center. It'll blow you away. You'll go through the consultation, you get a confluent. Have you been to an eye doctor in a while. Go.

[B]

No.

[A]

They touch your eye with this thing. And like, then the computer goes and just tells you everything there is to know about the eye.

[B]

I gotta check it out.

[A]

It's amazing.

[B]

I'm still down to, you know, like everyone. You know. Lower level light.

[A]

Oh, you don't like readers for that? Yeah, yeah.

[B]

And that's, you know, or something.

[A]

Readers are a thing that's tougher to avoid, but you can. Man, it's amazing when you and I don't know, maybe not maybe now they got all this technology coming that way too, that the readers are out. It is unreal the stuff they've got. And that's what I hear they say.

[B]

Like, no more readers.

[A]

Yeah. It used to be like you felt like you're going to Clockwork Orange and stuff and get your eyes pried open and they just take this little thing and it goes dip, dip onto your eye. You don't even feel it. And then it's like you're in the matrix. All the computer screens go up. You got this. Get that, you got that. And it knows everything. Then they do the test. It's incredible. Just go for the. You know what? Go like you're going to Disneyland. You might. Your eyes might be fine, but just go get checked. They're probably not. Most of us have something going on. Get rid of the glasses. Get rid of the contacts. Get your complimentary consultation at the Schwartz Laser Eye center. Now. I'm telling you, it's neat, it's cool. It's like being in a computer simulation. Oh, my God, that Twix is doing a number. Kicking your ass. Maybe I should go to Dr. J. Schwartz. Affecting my eyes. There you go. Check it all out. Schwartz Laser eye [e-mail] they are the Suns and Diamondbacks official eye doctor. They can be yours as well. Schwartz Laser Eye Center, Brady Entertainment.

[B]

Let's open up strong with a upcoming book that's coming out called Bernie for Burlington.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

It's about Bernie Sanders and how he once built himself a device so he could achieve. Achieve Cosmos. Cosmos. Shattering orgasms.

[A]

That's right. I built the dildo for Bernie. We built it up there in Vermont. And it's social dildo, too. So, Brett, not only I benefit from this dildo, but everyone in the neighborhood also gets a piece of my Bernie Dilda. Wow. Orgasms for everyone. That's my program. I didn't think of this, Brett. I would have been President of the United States had I said, you're gonna pay off your student loans and do all that stuff. Healthcare for all. How about dildos and orgasms for everybody. I would have been president for the next. Voted for you. Oh my God, Brady. Mike. My orgasms are earth shattering. One time it looks like a Krispy Kreme. When I'm done with you, you coated. It's an unbelievable orgasm. And I'm like a pig, Brady. I'm like a bovine. What do they call those things? Not bovine. Bovine's a bovine is a cow.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What do they call the pigs? Anyway, I'm like that swine. 30 minutes. That's how long Bernie Sanders. 30 minutes.

[B]

You're like a giant bull.

[A]

I'm a bull? Yeah, that's right. Both speaking. And you know my I. I ejaculate waves. It's frothy and forever. That's right. Picture that today while you drink your latte. Bernie's froth. That's what I call it. It's an amazing. Oh.

[B]

So you ready for this?

[A]

I've been ready. Here we go.

[B]

Dan Shazan is a poet and journalist. He's the guy that authored the book. And he talks about how when Bernie was younger, he was a follower of the father of freedom, Love in his youth. Heavily influenced by the controversial sex therapist Wilhelm Reich.

[A]

The Third Reich.

[B]

According to this guy, Reich believed that liberation could be achieved via enhanced climaxes.

[A]

Do you remember, Brett, when. Back in the days. Of course. The Kennedys have had many tragedies. But do you remember? Do you remember Mary Jo Kopechnik?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

She was. She was with Ted Kennedy and drown. It was big scandal. She drowned. I was with her sister Susie. Joe Kopechny and I drowned her as well. But we never went to the lake. It was with my massive river of ejaculate.

[B]

Wright built a device called the Orgon accumulator.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

Supposedly collected energy to be later released in the form of explosive orgasms.

[A]

That's right, Brady.

[B]

So Bernie, inspired by it, built his own.

[A]

I built one at home with wood. Copper wire. That's right.

[B]

Spot spikes.

[A]

It was amazing.

[B]

And he slept on it to channel the energy into his body.

[A]

That's right. I would sleep on spikes. And you couldn't believe the orgasms. Unbelievable. It's unreal. Picture me with a whole gut of tummy puddles. Oh, on picture. And then I called all the neighborhoods I got. Look, not just for me. I don't believe in capitalism. It's literally for everyone.

[B]

You were the Vermont decorator?

[A]

Yeah. Come one, come all. I say yes. I decorated most of it in the Christmas time. They said we need you to flock the streets. And I would do it. Bernie North. Now, I was. That's right. Bernie north, south, east and west. I'll tell you. Anyway. That's what being a libertarian is. To shoot your stuff all over everyone. Because it's. It's not. It's not just for the reds and the blues. Brady. I enjoy this. I love ejaculating Bernie Sanders. Sanders. God. I should rephrase that. It's disgusting. But breakfast should be over by now. If you. Look, I'm not against this. But right now, talking about the things I'm talking about as Bernie Sanders at 10am Unless you're black, you should be done with breakfast already. Fred laughed at that. Because it's very late. That's right. And get that fixed. For God's sakes. What are you doing? That's what I would do for president. I wouldn't help the innocent cities. I wouldn't help the other cities with the finances. That's silly. But I would buy them all batteries and small step stool. A small step stool because I know you don't have vaulted ceilings. You get up there and fix that damn thing. These ceiling birds have got to be stopped. 9 v for every 9 v for the entire urban community. We gotta fix this. The scourge. Then I come over and I'd be like, let's test it. Okay. It's beeping. Did you. You got to blow up the sensor and then you're done with that. Blow on me and you'll drown in it. I'm ejaculating Bernie Sanders. I'm running for president. 2028. I see that in the squares this week, probably. I think I've burned it. What more can he do? Oh, well. Think we've got to figure it out. We got till Friday. Write it down.

[B]

What if he pulls that machine out every now and then still?

[A]

You know what?

[B]

Time to give it a word.

[A]

You know what's amazing is both me and the current president are just making a mess of our underpants. Trump's taking down his thighs. And here I am, Niagara Falls, in my Aries underpants. I have the days of the week on them. Keep them in order.

[B]

According to the American Gaming association, we're going to spend about 1.76 billion on super bowl betting.

[A]

Good Lord. Really? Yeah. The economy's all screwed up in this country, apparently. Wow.

[B]

One game that includes legal regulated sports books.

[A]

And what we're doing. Smokes, man.

[B]

And they did a survey about the halftime. Six in 10Americans know who Bad Bunny is. And the alternative show. You may mentioned it. The. What's it called? The Turning Point. It's Kid Rock, Brantley, Gilbert Lee, Bryce and Gabby Barrett. Or headline the Turning point USA All American halftime show.

[A]

Okay, calm down. And then for the end, I will be the pyrotechnic, so to speak. You're the grand finale with the grand finale. As I coat the entire crowd an American chisholm. I'm making myself sick.

[B]

Here's a.

[A]

And now here's an old man jerking it. That old man happens to be me. Watch out world, because here I come. Bernie's coming.

[B]

The five worst halftime shows. Super bowl halftime show.

[A]

Diana Ross, Modern era. Super Bowl 30.

[B]

Diana Ross is in there, but not in the top five, I think.

[A]

Which ones are really, really Black Eyed Peas.

[B]

Okay, so Black Eyed Peas is number five. Life.

[A]

Yeah, I was at that.

[B]

They said the audio issues.

[A]

Horrible.

[B]

Were bad.

[A]

I went and got a drink. I left. I didn't even care to see it. It was.

[B]

And I forgot Slash and Usher.

[A]

It was so loud. I mean, it was so intensely loud. It was just. I mean, you know when somebody turns their radio up too loud and they don't have good speakers. It was that.

[B]

Super Bowl 31 was number four. That's the blues Brothers.

[A]

Oh, dear God.

[B]

They really should have retired the act when John Belushi died.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, Jim Belushi, Dan Aykroyd and John Goodman.

[B]

Number three. They're saying it was the Janet Jackson, Justin Timberlake, Super Bowl 38.

[A]

Disagree.

[B]

The gripe was mostly about how Janet got blackballed from showing her bejeweled nipple. The bridges didn't. Nothing happened to Justin Timberlake. Really.

[A]

Aerosmith, Britney Spears.

[B]

Did he not Kid Rock and Jessica Simpson said we're featured in that halftime.

[A]

I don't remember that one.

[B]

Number two was the Disney halftime shows. The Super Bowl 25, 29 and 34.

[A]

That's before they really started trying.

[B]

1991, 95 and 2000. You had. The first one was New Kids on the Block. Second was Tony Bennett and Patti LaBelle.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Hyping Disneyland's new Indiana Jones ride. Then the third was Phil Collins, Christina Aguilera and Enrique Iglesias.

[A]

Once Pepsi sponsored the halftime show and started putting a few hundred million into it, it'd be changed. And now Apple does it and it's a billion dollars. So number one, the worst one ever. I still lean on that Diana Ross thing.

[B]

That was Super Bowl 53.

[A]

Just recently.

[B]

Coldplay, Maroon 5, Adam Levine showing his nipples.

[A]

Yeah, he did. He. His mom porn it was boring, but he wasn't terrible.

[B]

Yeah, I don't know.

[A]

I guess they when fat Lady Gaga floated down from the top of the Reliant Stadium in her like in that awful outfit that she didn't work out for her performance. Not good. Anyway, I'm not going to read this. This one says, how would Bernie nut on an underarm boob? All right, this show's over. It's like, those are the requests we don't take. I'm not going to read it, Philip Stafford. But I'll tell everybody. Pour one out for Odo. Cookies. Cookies and treats for Odo. Because he's got his. I just read the thing right before we went on the air.

[B]

And Odo.

[A]

Odo, raise a glass and throw a cookie in your dog's mouth for Odo. The gems, they. They come and they go. They don't last long. And I'll be more than happy to tip one out. Hug my puppies for your loss. So sorry, Odo. One of the good ones. It's 10:10. We're all done. Larry's coming up next. You guys have yourselves a fan tastic Tuesday. We'll see you tomorrow on the Morning Sickness. So long, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect.