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Brett Vesely
You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. Hey, it's Brett Vesely and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?
Byron
Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into M and P Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wrong hands.
Brett Vesely
Okay, but what if he lives out of state?
Byron
Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it online. It really that simple.
Brett Vesely
There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms.
Larry McFeely
Everybody loves the Toyota Tacoma. This is Larry McFeely and even our very own Tripp Reeb just picked up a new Toyota Tacoma for his towing needs. Of course, he loves the fact that it provides over 450 foot pounds of torque, but you should have heard him raving about the giant 14 inch touchscreen and his favorite, the removable JBL Bluetooth speaker you can pull right off of the dash to blast the 98k upd app. He's a Tacoma lover now, but how could he not be? It's time for you to take a look at the new Toyota Tacoma. Visit your Valley Toyota dealers or valleytoyotadeealers.com Toyota let's go places.
John Holmberg
Still streaming Homberg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Tuesday. It is 5:45. This is the Morning Sickness podcast. You start calling it that. Screw it. Radio's gone. Yeah. Welcome to the podcast. Let's just shift focus. What do you say?
Brady
Might as well.
John Holmberg
Yeah, I do it. Hi, my name's John, host of the podcast. There's Brady, my co host of the podcast. There's Brett, the other co host of the podcast. And then Toledo does something around here. I think he's still on radio. We're just having a. I'm just bitching before the show starts as per usual. But yeah, another. You know what? I'm. This is crazy. I'm in Spring Head. Well, that sounds bad. I'm in spring mode because the weather is so great. I'm having all my March stuff happen in early February. I'm starting to breathe weird. I get my chest all Night kicking the bg.
Nash
Yeah.
Tripp
Last couple of days, every time I.
John Holmberg
Sit down and get comfortable my chest goes hey, let's make this miserable. And I'm yeah, I'm in the middle of March. What?
Tripp
You know I've been goose in my nasals with thing. Yes. Spray.
John Holmberg
Don't say that. I don't want to even google search that because I have a feeling it'll come up on one of Brett's videos.
Brady
I'm sure it will later I want.
John Holmberg
To start something like tend to do praising myself. I don't know if you guys heard. The other day I went on a, about a 45 minute rant about the state of Arizona, city of Phoenix bringing back the speeding cameras. And I, I feel single handedly responsible. Back in the, the aughts and early the 21st century of stopping the speed cameras here when this was back when this was a radio show, I stopped it completely and currently went out again and said if they waited 16 years, which is a full generation of they don't know, let's get them again. And they forgot I was still here doing this podcast.
Brady
Oh yeah.
John Holmberg
And I went on and you know what has happened? City of Phoenix has shelved the camera program. Good on them also very possibly going to put it up for a vote now. Right now they're shelving the red light camera program. The speeding camera program can't be far behind that because that is a company that they have an agreement with. But they may, they may let us vote on it. And any one of you mother out there voting yes to have your tax dollars pay for cameras to fine us for more tax dollars is the dumbest person alive. Basically go F yourself. Go F yourself. So everybody votes no and just drive a little nicer. It's up to us. You don't need a parent taking pictures of your naughtiness. Start behaving a little bit better. You're speeding. Cool it. When nobody else is speeding, you're causing trouble.
Tripp
Speeding is one thing, but we, we are above average on running red lights.
John Holmberg
Okay, fine. Driving like an asshole is different than speeding. If everybody's going 80 and you're going 95, you're an asshole. If everybody's going 95 and you're going 120, you're an asshole. There was a guy in McDowell the other day, I was driving and I was gonna change lanes and he, a bullet just flew by me. He had to be going 90, 95. And I'm like, we're all going 55. That's good. This is a 40 mile an hour zone. We're all cruising along a little heavier than we're supposed to. Everybody said, this just shot by me. I'm like, I almost switched lanes and just obliterated that dude. It was a little car. You're driving like an asshole. The camera's not gonna stop people like that. And they're the ones we need to stop. But I did stop it. Once again, you're welcome. Because they went back and said, ah, that asshole's still over there. And that everybody remember that radio show that got ah, he's doing it again and they don't want to get caught with my plan. If you guys list. And also thanks to you guys for being degenerate enough that the city goes, oh, that KP audience, they'll do that dick thing he was talking about. And then we got to worry about sending pornographic material through the mail like that asshole. So kudos to all of you for having the reputation of being just off kilter enough that you might drive around with an 18 inch dildo. Like I said, it scares them because they can lose their city bond for sending pornographic material through the mail. It scares them to death. I watched them get scared when I had my big 18 inch dildo picture on my photo radar right there at that courthouse. It scared everybody. It was awesome. And thanks to my neighbor back in the day for doing that. I forgot his name. Bald guy. Which came in real handy. God, I forgot his name. My neighbor from way back in 2008, house.
Brady
Huh.
John Holmberg
I don't remember him. Yeah, heck of a nice guy. We weren't great friends, but you know, clearly good enough though. Good enough for me to go, hey, you want to do me a favor? And he goes. And it was basically one of those things where he's like, what? Said, look, I got caught driving around. I did it on purpose. I 18 inch dildo, big, veiny, big, fainy, huge. I want to see it. He goes, what? Like, yeah, put your kids inside. They were like three. Put your kids inside. Come here. I showed it to him and he said, I got pictures. And he goes, you're driving around with that in your face. I'm like, yeah. I said, I'm trying to stop speed cameras.
Brady
This is before you were gay too.
John Holmberg
Yeah, I know. He didn't even know I was. He didn't know I was pseudo gay yet. I wasn't pretending to be gay yet to get away with like saying gay stuff.
Tripp
He's like, that's when I saw on the side of the Avalanche the other.
John Holmberg
Day, I saw a guy driving around with that stuck to Victoria. Hey, that's my buddy. That was us. He said, what are you doing again? I said, like, I'm like Don Quixote, except for with a huge, veiny wiener. And I'm driving around and I'm stopping this stuff and I need your help. And he looked at me like I was insane. And I started to get that vibe. Like, I have barked up the wrong tree. And I'll never forget his next words. He goes, it's just too good not to do. And I'm like, let's go. And he got his kid, me and him in the car, and I just milled around in the lobby acting like I didn't know him while I listened to what he said. And then I went up and I said, you're not allowed to send pornographic. So they're not allowed to send pornographic material through the mail. It was awesome. Watching them melt down was awesome. So. And we also had that guy, my friend Scott was with us, and he had a legal brain. He knew every word of every commercial code there was, and he was just barking at him. Oh, it was phenomenal. So I did it again. I'm gonna take credit for it again. If we end up voting on that, they should call it the Holmberg Bill. A, for my ego. B, well, no, that's it. That's really all it is. That's all I care about. That's good promotion for this podcast. We're. You're asking yourself, why does he keep saying that? That's because I've watched radio executives destroy this business into a point where it's just time to shift. I don't want to be part of them anymore. We're now a podcast. We just happen to do a radio show, too. It'll be good. The radio still does. Well, our show does, but man, oh, man, tick tock, tick tock with these knobs running it.
Nash
I don't care.
John Holmberg
I'm not singling out. There's a couple of good ones and there's a couple of doofuses, and they don't know which ones are what. And so that can't get caught for being insubordinate if I don't name names. But there's a couple of them that are, like, head trauma dumb and they think I don't know what's going on. I get. I got people. I got two things I want to talk about before I get into a theory of mine and the reason I've been a bit more conspiratorial lately is because I. Like I've been saying lately, I'm not sure I believe anything isn't fake anym. Not that it isn't happening, but it's happening because it's being forced to happen. Nothing's happening organically. I don't believe truly that all of this stuff has happened organically. The Epstein files came out a couple days ago, and it's a treasure trove of pornography.
Tripp
Did you say three million pages?
John Holmberg
Three million pages. A treasure trove of his pornography. This is what should have been first, why were we going through emails where Frank Caliendo's show was being sold in West Palm before? We're like, oh, yeah, also, this is what you release. So it was all this distraction nonsense and everything else. I don't believe the Epstein files are being handled with anything legitimately. I think certain aspects of this whole ICE thing are choreographed to distract from that. Plus the $9 billion theft that happened in Minnesota. And then a certain, certain, like, coincidence that Minnesota is the place that had a $9 billion shortfall in theft that also happens to be now the. The home of righteous morality. And everything's beautiful there suddenly, and everybody's forgotten about the other. That seems fake. All of it seems fake to me. And. And before I get into anything where you're like, oh, you're crazy conspiratorial guy, because I got another one that I think may be tied to this. I remind you, I gotta find that thing just so I get it just right. Hold on, hold on. Another guy, for the fourth time in Louisiana, has been calling nurses pretending to be mentally so he gets his ass wiped. We have a second Munchaka.
Tripp
Wow.
John Holmberg
So I'm starting as I get a little older to see, like, wait a minute, that's already been a story. They're just changing the names. I think they circulate the same things with, especially now with AI that they can just go, that story has legs. We've got something going on. People will be described. They've got fourth time. And his name is awesome Routledge Dais iv, which tells me he's been raised very low. I am Rutledge Deus iv and I refuse to wipe my own bottom. It is beneath me, literally. So I'm going to pretend to be ment handicapped and hire people to do such a thing, get the feces from my bottom creases. And so he did that, and he's now in jail for the fourth time. So I'm like, all right, that's a distraction. There's another story about a little girl who got kissed by someone with herpes and her eye fell out. Yes, it's a real story. Her eyeball fell out because of that.
Tripp
Did get treatment in time.
John Holmberg
Here's the other thing. The simulation is not working. No, she went there and they're like, what happened to a little eye infection? And then they spun it back to like Aunt Carol has herpes and gave her a little on the face and it burned her eye out.
Tripp
It's like the moil who kissed the kid.
John Holmberg
Yes, well, because they have to eat the blood of the and he kissed a wounded that whole thing baby hurt. It's gross to suck the blood out of the foreskin because that's part of the religion. What?
Brady
I'm switching religions?
John Holmberg
Here's the other thing. There's no way this is real. They evacuated a hospital in England because a man stuffed a World War I artillery shell up his ass. This is the world we live in.
Larry McFeely
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Brett Vesely
Football's biggest game is right in front of us, and you've still got time to get in on the action. With underdog, it's Brett Vesely from the morning sickness. And playing on underdog is just so easy. Go to the app, pick players to go higher or lower on their stats, and if you get your picks right, you could win 5,000 times your money. Now, I'm gonna go with both quarterbacks, Drake, May and of course, Sam Darnold to go higher on their passing touchdowns. Now, new apps drop daily. So download the underdog app today and use a promo code HMS to score 75 in fantasy bonus entries. When you play your first $5, underdog make picks win. Money must be 18 +, 19 in Alabama, Nebraska, 19 in Colorado for some games, 21 in Arizona, Massachusetts and Virginia. And present in a state where underdog fantasy operates. Terms apply. See assets.underdogfantasy.com web playand getterms_dfs_ht for details offer not valid in Maryland, Michigan, New Jersey, New York, Ohio, and Pennsylvania. Concerned with your play, call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit www.ncpgambling.org. in New York, call 24. 7 Hope Line at 1-877-8-HOPE NY or text Hope NY 467-369.
John Holmberg
Holberg's Morning Sickness.
Tripp
You're gonna sue him.
John Holmberg
Yeah. So. So guy got we. We now have too many stories of things in people's asses on a constant basis. That makes me think that the distraction. Flags are flying everywhere. Now we've got Savannah. Here's where I go crazy. Savannah Guthrie's mom down there in Tucson with what is now the one of the weirder things ever.
Tripp
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Suddenly, here in Tucson, one of the members of the liberal left media has her mother stolen, and they're now saying it's a crime and it is a kidnapping and possibly a trafficking situation.
Tripp
Huh.
John Holmberg
Wouldn't that be convenient to have the left media have to deal with an illegal immigrant stealing one of her family members, and suddenly ice saves the day in a border state.
Tripp
I think it's someone in the office with her because now she can't cover the Olympics.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Yeah. Now she has.
Tripp
The other person gets to go.
John Holmberg
It's going to get attention. I don't know if they'll solve this thing, but I guarantee you the perpetrator is going to be an illegal alien with a history of crimes who was let go under the Biden administration, and we'll all fight about it no matter what happens here. None of this smells right. None of it. Everything seems like vanilla ice. Clumsy choreography. I feel like I'm watching the ice ice baby video. I'm like, this is white dancing. There's a lot of white people dancing, and it's not normal. Just guarantee it. When it. When the smole stink comes off of this, I almost promise you that it will be an illegal immigrant with a track record that stole Savannah Guthrie's mother. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. But, man, does this stink to high heaven to me. And the timing couldn't be. And, you know, you kind of go to the today show. You tap into a name that we all sort of recognize whether we watch or not.
Brady
I had no idea who it was, right. Until they kept saying, oh, today's show.
John Holmberg
I'm like, I remember last time I.
Tripp
Watched another word like, oh, that's Savannah Goodman.
John Holmberg
She's been around for a long time. I know.
Tripp
I recognize.
John Holmberg
Yeah, she's Done a lot of stuff she does. I watch a lot of crime drama, the Dateline stuff, and she'll pop up.
Tripp
I think it's a good now, you know. You know, to call your mom today if she's still alive.
John Holmberg
That's a great idea. Yeah. But I'm telling you, man, the. This is such a. To me, it's like, of course. Of course they need something else. And I don't think that they're. I don't think that's a great point. Yeah.
Tripp
Not. Not far fetched.
John Holmberg
No. And there's the problem. Right. There's the thing that when I say it, you're like, well, there's going to be people who are screaming and yelling about it, but would you put it past the side that's currently losing the media fight to say, we need to win? How do we do it? And they concoct this nonsense. Because there's no doubt in my mind that there is a distraction process going on, not only for the Epstein files, but for the theft in Minnesota and all that. I don't want to get political about it because I don't believe either side's telling us any. I don't know how you side with either group. I hate them. Both.
Tripp
Both sides have an agenda.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
And now this one's like, well, it's the midterms. We got to win here. There'll either be a hero that comes out of this, or the bad guy's gonna be a perfect representation going, this is why we need ice. Perfect. Meanwhile, people are like, brady brought up this morning off the air that in the Olympics they're changing the name of the ice facility, the Ice House to Winter House. Cause we can't even hear the word ice now. Without thinking, well, that's not because you can't have it in your glass anymore. Cause people lose their mind.
Tripp
So it's in Milan and it's cold.
John Holmberg
What do they care?
Tripp
They don't care anything.
John Holmberg
Like, oh, yeah.
Tripp
Talk about making a spotlight on something that looks silly.
John Holmberg
Could have just left it alone.
Tripp
Yeah.
John Holmberg
We know the difference between ice in a glass, ice on the ground for hockey, and the ice.
Tripp
What are they gonna do on that?
John Holmberg
Yeah.
Brady
So, right. What do I do when I go to a bar?
John Holmberg
Non.
Brett Vesely
I want the ice in my drink.
Brady
Cold cubes, okay?
John Holmberg
You call them cold cubes. The melties. I call them the melties now. Nothing feels real to me.
Tripp
Freezy squares.
John Holmberg
And you know what's worse about it? Like I said when I say this, people are kind of like, oh, no, there's like maybe something to that. And you can dismiss it immediately. I'm fine with that. I want to dismiss it immediately. But it isn't far fetched. Brady said that. It's not far fetched. It's not a theory that popped in my mind. And I'm no longer questioning when I go, hey, this feels like bull. I no longer question that. I don't care if you think I'm crazy.
Tripp
Better shut your mouth. You'll be in a straight jacket.
John Holmberg
Exactly. They're gonna start calling me crazy. You know what? I know now after a few years of being alive on this planet, when they call you crazy, it's usually because you did something right.
Tripp
Alex Jones. I'm sorry.
John Holmberg
Because, well, he went absolutely nuts. I'm probably. That dude went nuts.
Tripp
You're starting to be a little more forgiving on that, aren't you?
John Holmberg
I'm forgiving of his first ideas, but when he started with the gay frogs, he needed to. He needed to cushion stuff a little easier. He came out of the gates a little hot.
Tripp
I think it was too much weed.
John Holmberg
I think it's the thing when you. I don't know if it's an age thing. I'm not tinfoil hat. I don't want to be right. I just think I might be. Everything feels like a look over here. Everything. And it's clumsy. It's just flat clumsy. I don't think. I don't think Savannah Guthrie's in on it. I honestly believe that they'll use us as pawns every once in a while to get their message across. And there's going to be. Mike. I was. I've been right about a lot of this stuff. The Ryan Lochte thing stunk immediately. Everybody called me nuts. Turned out I was exactly right. Jussie Smollett thing. I remember turning the mics off that morning, looking at you going, this is crap. But I don't want to go down the road and be wrong that a gay black guy didn't get beat up in the middle of the night. But. And that morning we hashed out like, no, none of this is real. And it made too much sense that it wasn't real, that people didn't get that mad. And then luckily for us, because we'd have been kicked right off the air for not believing it right away. It was like a couple days later, people started questioning it a little bit. For a while, he was a hero. If you remember, we've smelled this out a few times, more than a few times. And it isn't conspiratorial. When you're right. You're not a conspiracy theorist anymore. When you're right. This one stinks. And I feel terrible for Savannah and her mom and all this other stuff, but I guarantee you, no matter how this and this might have been an organic kidnapping, but what they're going to focus on in the end is illegal immigrant did this. It's a sex trafficking problem. That's a human trafficking issue. And this guy was an illegal alien. And he's got a rap sheet for.
Tripp
How you get a payday. Now, if I'm wrong, Savannah Guthrie's grandmother.
John Holmberg
If I'm wrong, first of all, I'm not looking for you guys to go, you were wrong. I'll gladly and happily say, thank God I was wrong, because it'll. It'll give me a little bit more hope and grace that we're not constantly being fooled. But if I'm right, I'm gonna grandstand on it and really make myself look good because that's what everybody else is doing, so why shouldn't I? But I want to be wrong. So before you guys start firing off, cool. Great. Because that means I was wrong. And things aren't as goofy as I think they are. But it just stinks to high heaven that this is yet another thing that we're going to sit and stare at and go, any right. Meanwhile, people are shoving artillery shells up their asses and going to the hospital.
Tripp
He's getting sued.
John Holmberg
And I'd be the one that gets called crazy. Dudes are faking being retarded to get their asses wiped. And it ain't the first time we've. We've seen this, everybody.
Tripp
That's what's weird. It wasn't that long ago. It was like six months ago. Someone was messing around with the again immortal.
John Holmberg
Oh, more.
Tripp
Yeah.
John Holmberg
People are finding World War I. They have a problem with that in Europe. People forget that's how.
Brady
What, artillery shells up the ass?
John Holmberg
Well, no, like Princess Diana fought. She lost that battle. But she fought vehemently against hidden landmines throughout Europe through World War I and 2 and all their wars and stuff still out. Heather Mills lost her leg. Paul McCartney's wife lost her leg, if I remember right, from stomping around on one of those things and blew up under the ground years and years. You can't go through like fields in England without like maybe a couple active mind stuff.
Tripp
I think she lost her Heather Mills like in the Mozambique or that kind of.
John Holmberg
Either way, you find an artillery shell in Europe. You're pretty well versed in the idea of going, ah, probably this could be active. No, dude shoved in at his ass and went, it's not coming out. And he went to the hospital. Something's in my ass. Clear it out. Cleared the whole hospital. It's like that might be an active.
Brady
At least it wasn't active.
John Holmberg
Well it wasn't active, but not the way it was intended.
Tripp
It's a dud.
John Holmberg
It's a dud. We've done all the research we can and luckily the artillery shell you've stuffed in your ass isn't an explosive anymore. Shell wasn't active.
Brady
Yeah, his ass definitely was.
John Holmberg
Thank gosh. Now rip that thing up my ass. Like people are losing their minds on a daily basis and we're busy calling people like me crazy for saying does this smell funny?
Nash
Just a matter of time before the home bird show goes bananas. You know there are gay frogs.
John Holmberg
This guy says, who the hell would sex traffic an 84 year old woman. Did Zach Ray go cougar hunting and stealing? It might have been Zach Ray. Zach might have gone after that 84 year old broad. I don't know. It just all feels funny.
Tripp
Assume they went to the house and everything was there like her purse and identification. She's just missing.
John Holmberg
Yeah, this guy that just emailed me just opened my brain too. I have to look at this and I'm gonna. James McCarthy. I just read your email. I remember the Tyson Evander Holyfield fight. Evander's ear is still not the same. It looks funny. He bit of a chunk off. James McCarthy says Trump's ear. Look at it. There's no damage. He lost a lobe. Never gets talked about. Nothing's wrong with his ear. I haven't looked but if that's true and I watched Evander Holyfield's ear get half chunked and then when it grew back it's got this little half moon cut out on top.
Tripp
He couldn't afford the plastic surgery.
John Holmberg
I don't know that he ever tried. He might have fixed it since but for a long time he had that weird little he get bit off and spit out right in front of all of us. And he's forever had the markings of that. I haven't looked at Trump's ear since the thing. Don't start that with me. That one can't be because I do. But again they're take. They'll take us.
Tripp
And he's not wearing his wedding ring.
John Holmberg
Trump didn't wear his wedding ring. No, I don't think he swells up.
Tripp
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Anyway, I don't want to go too crazy, but I think I might be going a little crazy and I think I might be right a lot. This one says Scott Ames is right. He goes, they haven't done a silver alert for this lady in Tucson. That's a good point.
Brady
They do it to their whole state. I can't remember, okay, oh yeah, it's.
John Holmberg
An hour and a half, so they already know where she is. Just a matter of time before they reveal all that they she's Mexico.
Brady
That goddamn turquoise alert at four in the morning that time.
John Holmberg
But you're right, Scott, they haven't blown us up with that yet. Oh, I've gone bananas, everybody.
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John Holmberg
Holmberg's Morning Sickness. And it's not.
Tripp
I wonder if they put it out just because it's too far. Now we figure out, oh, she's kidnapped. No need to do the Amber Alert.
John Holmberg
The Silver Alert. Amber Alert, Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, but wouldn't you. Anyway, the news covers the silver alerts. Plus, like, locally, all the news will talk about it, so it's not like, yeah, we already talked about it on tv. Not everybody's paying attention. So on the billboards, it should say silver Alert. Looking for. They don't know what they're. They got.
Tripp
They don't know what they're looking for.
John Holmberg
It's hard not to just immediately go, that seems like bull. And then my old me used to go, probably not. And my new me is like, no, trust your gut.
Nash
You gotta trust your gut.
John Holmberg
I gotta. I'm sorry. I went right into Silk Sonic. But the. Yeah, you can't. Nothing seems real to me anymore. And I hate it. I'm not. I'm not celebrating this new mindset. I hate it.
Brady
And it's both sides.
John Holmberg
Of course.
Brady
It's not just, you know, this would.
John Holmberg
This is completely PR. On the other side going, watch this. We'll make it so they're the heroes. We'll make it so our point gets made with one of theirs. It's brutal. And I just don't buy anything anymore. And I hate my new brain. I kind of liked the old days when I could get up and joke around about stuff. And then occasionally someone would stuff an artillery shell in their ass. And it was. And it was mind blowing. I'm not even shocked to read it anymore.
Tripp
We got another one.
John Holmberg
I wake up in the morning like, oh, somebody's in the hospital for shoving something that doesn't go in their ass. In their ass. And that's been going on for a long time. People been stuffing things in their butts for a long time, but it seems to be getting strangely large and dangerous. I blame the interwebs. I blame them all. But, yeah, I don't want to go crazy, but I think I already have. I might be the Jose Canseco of. Of this world, apparently.
Brady
Gabriel said they did do a silver alert yesterday.
John Holmberg
Oh, did they? Okay.
Brady
It was on TV and everything, so.
John Holmberg
All right, thanks, Gabriel. And this is. Don't forget, John, we're sending people to the moon this week. Well, no, this morning they scrubbed that. It's not happening anymore. We were going to go around the moon once, but they can't.
Brady
Why? We were there before.
John Holmberg
No. Well, difference is a matter.
Tripp
Maybe weather.
John Holmberg
Oh, here you go again. I don't know. I don't know that I believe that at all anymore. This one says, John welcome. Everything we know as a society is based off of lies and bs. Our nation has been run by Luciferian pedophiliac cults. Was Doug Hopkins in the Epstein files? No, he's not. He's not, as far as I know. But my friend Frank Galliando was. Am I in them? So much mundane nonsense.
Tripp
And Bill and Hillary testify today, right?
John Holmberg
Yeah. I don't know that I ever want to say the words Luciferian pedophiliacs. But I'm gonna go with you for a little while. It doesn't bother me. This one says, seems like that big Juneau's is finally coming through and sniffing out the truth. That's right. The big Jew knows is finding its way to truth. Yeah, I'm not crazy yet, but I am. This is say that there's a phrase for it going crazy. I think I'm in the throes of that.
Brady
John. You should have taken the blue pill, not the red.
John Holmberg
Life is better and harder on the blue one. Yeah, Brady's. Brady was right the whole time, having no idea how things work and just living his life, looking for his next meal. Goddamn guy's a genius. That's all there is. Brady, you're the smartest one in the room by not caring this much. There he goes. Look at him.
Nash
Artillery shell in your bottom. Let's go to raising canes.
John Holmberg
Meanwhile I'm over there going, I can't believe this.
Nash
Did you see this?
John Holmberg
Brain won't let me do it. I can't let go. It's. I'm in limerence with crazy anyway. What are you gonna do? It's hard to get back to normal brains. It's hard to get back to being a normal person when your brain starts. And it isn't because I was influenced by anything. I just started to not question that doesn't seem right because I think it's because my history of thinking, hey, that. That doesn't seem right has been right so often.
Tripp
But come on, you can get back.
John Holmberg
Into the film, you know, to your.
Tripp
Way, more or less. You do.
John Holmberg
Brady, I could never be, no offense, that much of a worthless lump of dough. Hopefully you're not offended by that.
Tripp
No, no.
John Holmberg
I just. I want you to be happy, that's all. He'll get through It. Don't worry about it. Nothing bothers him.
Brady
People are saying to quit hanging out with Nash.
John Holmberg
They think it's Nash. Nash isn't Nash. All Nash talks about is 9, 11 and the moon and occasionally cholesterol. He goes nuts on cholesterol. He thinks it. And he's got some stuff that I listen to, but he's not convinced me of anything yet. In fact, he's the one I'm like, nope. I question him, too. I enjoy listening to him. I like when he starts talking. But Nash is. You know, Nash has gone. He's gone off the deep end on stuff that everybody's already done. He's not looking at new stuff yet. Although the cholesterol stuff is interesting. And salt. He's big on that.
Brady
What's that one?
John Holmberg
They try to keep you from doing things that your body actually needs and warn you that it's dangerous, like high cholesterol. Your body needs cholesterol. So then it's just a way to sell more pills and pill. Yeah, yeah.
Tripp
There's document.
John Holmberg
There's. Yeah, there's. Oh, there's tons of. And. And it's not wrong. But again, my argument is we live longer than we ever have, so there's some truth to the idea of keeping longevity alive and keeping us sick the entire time, at least a little bit. But that's our fault.
Tripp
Yeah. What is the argument on the. What is the advancement in medicine?
John Holmberg
I'll tell you this. It's 100 our fault. Because we will take convenience over the hard facts of, I can fix this myself, but I don't need to. Ozempic, high blood pressure, diabetes medicines, all that stuff. We could fix that, but a doctor says, why work so hard? Here's some pills you'll have to be on forever, and you don't have to do anything. And people are like, option B, please. That's awesome. Because if you really were like, hey, your blood pressure is crazy high, and you need to drop that, and the only way to do that is to. To, like, get in great shape. People are, I'm not doing that.
Tripp
We need more doctors, more nurses.
John Holmberg
That's right, because you're getting rid of the doctors.
Brady
Then it's like you said, convenience trumps everything, always.
John Holmberg
And that's where AI is going to come kick our asses, because it's going to make everything awesome. And we're like, I don't have to wipe my ass anymore. People are doing that already. So I don't want to go nuts with everything, but just, you know, antenna up I got a weird vibe on this one. Not that the kidnapping is fake, but how they're going to handle it when it's over. Do yourself a favor and watch the Pat Tillman documentary that came out years ago about how his family had to fight to find out what happened because they got lied to by the government like 8 or 9 times. Sat in front of every general, admiral, all the highest levels of the military, the four bigs, the Secretary of Defense, and another guy in the Defense Department as they all sat in front of the Tillman family and said their emails were down. The day the message came through, every one of them in different locations, all of their Internet and emails were down. So they had no possible way of getting those emails from the Department of Defense saying, don't talk about this. And they did. And then Rumsfeld went over to Pat Tillman's dad and said, I'm sorry, we did our best. And this was Harry Waxman and Donald Rumsfeld, opposite ends of the spectrum, politically hated each other, shaking hands, going, I'm in on this plan. We can't let these people know what actually happened to him. And he walked over to Pat Tillman's dad and said, did all we could put his hand up. Untilman's dead. Just goes you right to Donald Rumsfeld in the middle of the documentary. And it is powerful. It's awesome. And that's when you realized, oh, they're all in it together, and they're all gonna do whatever it is to protect their own ass. And we need to watch out, because Pat Tillman was being sold to us. And the Tillman family's the one that said, they tried to sell you a war with our son's head, man. Remember, it was bad, really bad. And they're emails that say, from Rumsfeld over to these guys, hey, this is good for us like it is.
Tripp
It's rally charge.
John Holmberg
Yeah, it was. It was. This is going to sell. The people will buy this. Now. We've got a hero. We've got an Audie Murphy. We've got a big boy.
Tripp
So keep the money coming in for the defense.
John Holmberg
And I remember sitting in the theater watching that one. Remember Camel Views? It used to show all the documentaries and stuff. Now it's stake 44. It's better than it was before. I'm glad it's stake 44. Trust me. Go in there, watch those documentaries. And I watch that one, and I'm like, man, this is just overblown nonsense. They're. They're trying to. They're doing the same thing, trying to sell us that it was all they were, right. Tillman's mom's a hero. She's an amazing human being. The family, the wife, all of them went through all that redacted stuff and found everything they needed to find and then just hung them. They hung them and managed to go into a courtroom going, we got you. And they all just lied, looked at him, and said, nothing we can do. We're in charge of the investigation. Bye. It was awesome.
Tripp
And did it change things? Maybe a little. I don't know.
John Holmberg
People deep down know that the story wasn't real and it didn't help them, but it got brushed away because there was never, like, any perjury. It was nothing.
Brady
Ignore, ignore, ignore.
John Holmberg
Ignore it. It'll go away. People will get distracted by a guy with an artillery shell in his ass enough that we'll be like, yeah, that's what I missed that. I missed that. I miss being walking behind Brady.
Brady
Back when we were a radio show.
John Holmberg
Back when radio was when we were on the radio. Remember that? Now we gotta do this podcast, the Golden Golden Days. The Golden Days, yeah. They call that the Halcyon Days. We're in the Halcyon Days. Back when our brains didn't question things. I hate it. And just for all you people who are like, remember you're talking about that to me, and a Guthrie thing turned out, you were wrong. I'm gonna just email back, thank God I was wrong. Because I'm also a human being that can admit that and walk away and go, it's okay that you're wrong sometimes. Which is another thing we can't do anymore. So I'll get the. I'll get the big mouths eventually if it doesn't. And I'm rooting for it. I'm rooting to be wrong. It'll give me a little bit of hope. It'll make it so if I'm right about this, I'll be like, oh, no, now I'm gonna do this with everything. If I'm wrong, it'd be like, see, John, you were wrong. You gotta pull back a little bit. I'm rooting to be wrong. I'm just saying it doesn't smell good.
Tripp
Witnesses saw two men and MAGA hats.
John Holmberg
Yeah, yeah, don't do that. And then maybe, you know what? There could be a thing.
Tripp
I can't do that one anymore.
John Holmberg
That's already been. I don't know.
FanDuel Announcer
But that.
John Holmberg
So is PA Chalk at getting his ass wiped by nannies. And they're doing that again. And the riots in Minnesota aren't new. We've seen that a couple times. The last. It worked five years ago. They went back to it. It's like when the Diamondbacks resigned. Randy Johnson was like, what are you doing? The glory days. He's this. You can't do this twice. You're right, though. I wonder if the left's going to try to get ahead of the right and go, we need to. We need to make the criminal and the Guthrie case two right wingers that hate NBC and they got and they found out it was NBC. Savannah Guthrie on TV and they kidnapped. That wouldn't surprise me. God damn it. It's.
Nash
There's a. I don't know what's going on around here, but I'm feeling a pain. Alex Jones will be right back after this.
John Holmberg
Morning sickness.
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John Holmberg
Holmberg's morning sickness.
Brady
She got kidnapped on her way to subway and everything else.
John Holmberg
They go right down the same two in the morning. It could. It was. It's 12 degrees. We don't know what's going on. Oh, no. I can't believe it. It's happening. But I don't want to. I don't want to know. It's happening to me. It's. It's happening to me right in front of you. I'll eat your ass. See, it's in my head.
Nash
We just offer our children up to.
John Holmberg
The system with the fluoride, the water and the GMO earning them. And we let fat perverts grab him at the airport to train him for the pedophile government. He's right. I don't want to be him. But I'm becoming him. I'm gonna be all red soon.
Nash
I'm gonna be bright red like they all get.
John Holmberg
Oh no. I'm gonna be one of those red people running around telling everybody that I've gone Crazy.
Tripp
But just months away for getting on Rogan.
John Holmberg
Yeah, that's true. It'd be great for the podcast when I share that. Even better. I'd just be sitting there, John's all red, and he got fat overnight.
Tripp
Where are the men in this country?
Nash
Where are the men in this world? What the hell have we become?
Tripp
Rogan will say to you. I remember coming on your radio program.
John Holmberg
That's weird. I mean, wow. Weird.
Nash
No, Joe, it's gone nuts. You used to do impressions. Yeah, I don't do that anymore, Joe. I days are over. I've gone crazy. I've turned bright red. I put on about 85 pounds.
Tripp
This is my son. That's a frog.
Nash
The frog is my gay son. The government turned my son into a frog. It's the reverse. He was a prince, and now he's a frog. They abducted him. They brought him back in my yard, threw him in my beautiful pond. And now I said back there, I said, that's my boy.
John Holmberg
Yep, it's a matter of time. Next time you see me out, I'll be at you fest in September. I'm like, holberg's all bright red. Like, what happened to him? Oh, he turned bright red. He's nuts now.
Tripp
What's with the foil hat?
John Holmberg
Yeah, you know, you can't be outside.
Nash
The chemtrails in the Crest. If you use Crest, your teeth are going to emit signals they can hear everywhere. Just the good.
John Holmberg
He put on, like, £90 and a.
Nash
Day, and he went nuts.
John Holmberg
I'm worried about me. Worried about me. But I'm doing that. Like, the TV's on and Savannah Guthrie's mother in Tucson. I'm like, that's terrible. And then my brain goes, terrible. It's bull.
Nash
Yeah, brain.
John Holmberg
You might be right. Why do you say that? Brain. Then Brain's like, you don't think they're going to use this as an immigration thing soon? Like, oh, it's Tucson. You're.
Nash
Oh, mother. Left wing media.
John Holmberg
Then my brain's like, go look in the mirror. Like, all right. You recognize that guy? Who. Where am I? Who's the red dude?
Nash
That's you.
John Holmberg
I don't know why all these conspiracy people start turning bright red because their blood pressures through the roof.
Tripp
You look like the dude from Fallout.
John Holmberg
Yeah, just turn it. Yeah, his nose fell off. He's. He's one of the ghouls now. Anyway, I don't want to be nuts, but I think it's happening. I think I'm going nuts. Not just live alone in a cabin. That's how you know it's me. When the. When the. When the raid comes, when the ATF has to come get me because I've.
Nash
Dug a huge hole. I put. I put mortars in it.
John Holmberg
And they just hear that.
Tripp
We see him as coming out of your house with file boxes and.
John Holmberg
Yep, that'll be. You know what? Mark. Mark my words. That day's coming, coming. And they'll catch me like this, Like, I don't know which house is his. And then inside the house, you'll just. You'll hear one of these coming out of the windows. That's. That's him. There he is. That's the guy. He's inside there reading the Internet again. He's going bang it down. Just knock the door down, God damn it. He's in there. He's the red one. Bright red ones in there. I promise you. Jesus Christ.
Nash
He's pathetic. This is son McGay, Frog, son.
John Holmberg
John. You didn't even have kids. I know.
Nash
They took the kids from the womb. I didn't even know I was a father. They brought it back as a frog with a homosexual tendency. It's Bad Bunny.
Tripp
Meg's like, I'm gonna go walk the dogs.
Nash
She's never coming back. As good as dead.
Tripp
I can't get John to come out.
Nash
There's a goose in the backyard. Flew over from the park. I know. That's Meg.
John Holmberg
A goose.
Nash
And turned her into a gay lesbian goose. They brought it over with those gay neighbors who brought their agenda into the cul de sac. And now all the animals are homosexual.
Tripp
What's with all those jugs of urine? He won't come out of his room.
Nash
The milk goes in the left hand. The milk goes in the left hand.
John Holmberg
Knock on the door, are you hungry? Open up.
Nash
No, the milk goes in the left hand.
John Holmberg
We're here for the urine jugs.
Nash
Never gonna take my urine and make some sort of serum out of it.
John Holmberg
I don't want to be crazy, but I have started the process. So if Brady. Well, he won't tell me. Brett, leave it up to you. If I start turning red, let me know, because that's the next step.
Tripp
It's a good color.
John Holmberg
Yeah. If anybody says you've been in the sun.
Nash
No, why would I ever be outside? That's where the chemtrails are.
John Holmberg
How's he turning all red like that? Oh, he's gone crazy. They all turn red. That's happening. I don't buy anything anymore, and I don't like that. I don't so don't email me with your nonsense. I no longer care when people are like, you're nuts. You're right. What do you. What do you. And that's the other thing, is the emailers that feel like they're, you know, Woodward and Bernstein. When they email you and go, I think you've gone crazy. I'm like, I think I told you that, jackass. It's like when I. I quit my job 26 years ago at that other radio station, and I remember going in there a week before and said, hey, I'm talking to kupd. They. They're thinking about put me on in the morning, and they got something going on. I just want to let you guys know that as a decent employee, I think I'm supposed to tell you, okay? And then two weeks later, when I quit, they're like, we also know that you've been talking with kupd. And I'm like, oh, well, way to go, Sherlock. I think I was the mother that told you that. What? You don't remember that you're the same dip that hired the program director that was fired once? One program director before, and you didn't even know. You didn't look at his resume long enough to know. You just hired a guy back that we worked with eight months ago.
Brady
That still blows me away.
John Holmberg
Yeah, he's the dumbest man alone. He's an idiot. He's. You know what I give him one thing credit for? Well, not just him. I can't give him all the credit. He's the one that, at a very early age, taught me that all the executives in radio are probably stupid. You got to find the gems. I think we got one sitting down the hall from us. I love Tripp because he kind of rolls his eyes, too. Maybe at me. I don't know. I haven't figured that out yet. But still, most of them are stupid. Can't do this job to save their ass. And then they do, like, little projects to stay relevant, and they're dumb. And. And Marv taught me that at an early age. Like, oh, they're all stupid. Like, they just do what you do. And they. They would have never allowed this show if I would have been listening to them. Like, you can't do that. You can't do that. Like, okay. And then I do it anyway, and they're like, it's working.
Tripp
There's the magic to that job trip. Every department. Yeah, you gotta keep happy.
John Holmberg
Yep.
Tripp
Concerned.
John Holmberg
Oh, yeah, he's good. But here's the thing is, here's How I know radio executives are stupid is because they look at me and say, 25 years in one city. He has no idea, no idea how radio works, really. Isn't that the goal is to keep a job your whole life? Oh, wait, you've been fired 19 times. You need that to matter. So you look at people with longevity as bad, and people have been fired 30 times as successful. Because that's your path. You suck. Not me. That's why. Anyway, this podcast is going great.
Tripp
Our number one.
John Holmberg
Yeah, we gotta change the name of it.
Nash
The Red man and the Boys.
John Holmberg
Trust me, it gets more interesting from here.
Nash
I got more coming up in the next hour.
John Holmberg
I gotta start saying that. A lot more for podcast the next hour.
Nash
We'Re gonna look into why women spend so much money on makeup. What is it?
Tripp
Because there's something in the making, something.
Nash
In it turning them into zombies.
John Holmberg
As I say that, by the way, as a joke, my brain went, not bad. That's where I am right now.
Nash
It is zombie. Zombie cream. Why do you think they sell it big? They gotta. They got an aisle at Walgreens called Fountain of Youth, and there's no male products in it. It's women, zombie makeup. They've all gone crazy. You notice how they all look like you've seen Ariana Grande? They got her.
John Holmberg
There is something to that. Kelly Osborne, Ariana Grande, they're all starting to look like what? That?
Brady
Yeah. What happened to Kelly Osborne?
John Holmberg
Thought we were into big asses. What's this? I like a girl, a little shape, but, like, not frozen. Scared to death. When did it. When did being scared to death of food become attractive? Ariana was pretty. Now I'm like.
Nash
What is that?
John Holmberg
I mean, that would be good makeup for fallout.
Brady
Is Pete Davidson banging Kelly too?
Tripp
I don't know.
John Holmberg
Maybe Pete Davidson.
Brady
Maybe it's his crank as the.
Nash
It's the crank of Davidson, they call it. It goes in and it turns them into skeleton people walking the earth like the. Like white walkers from the.
Tripp
Has a porcelain effect.
Nash
They just cringe and shake because they're always cold. The goal of these people is to make everybody 62 pounds. So keep shoving Ozempic into your bellies. I'm just gonna get fatter and more red and fight the system. I wanna look like a tomato that's about to explode. I feel like a tick, a tick of information gonna pop.
John Holmberg
I'm the information tick. Somebody make that T shirt gonna turn bright red.
Nash
Nobody'll pop.
John Holmberg
And hidden that way, man. I've gone. I've gone. A little bit off the off the rails. Let's get a wake up song for this podcast here. 585-9800. A good one. We'll scream it together. Matter of time before we get rid of all these beeps too. Podcast and we'll be able to say whatever we want.
Brady
The beeps. Oh, I thought you meant that.
Nash
Yeah, yeah.
Brady
Smoke detector.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Not that.
Nash
No.
John Holmberg
We'll never solve that mystery. Give it to us good and strong. We'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD.
Nash
Wake up.
John Holmberg, joined by the Morning Sickness crew, dives into his trademark blend of local Arizona news breakdowns, unfiltered hot takes, and an escalating stream of conspiratorial skepticism. The episode features John taking credit for Phoenix's decision to halt the speed camera program and then veers deep into recent headlines (Epstein files, Minnesota scandals, the Savannah Guthrie family kidnapping) – all explored through the lens of John’s growing mistrust of institutional narratives and his belief that today’s reality is driven by distractions and orchestrated spectacle. As usual, sharp humor, offbeat rants, and self-aware reflections keep the tone lively, skeptical, and slightly manic.
John recalls his crusade against the city's speed cameras, both in the 2000s and with a recent on-air rant. He claims his on-air pressure influenced Phoenix to shelve its red-light camera program and maybe even open these measures to a public vote.
Rant on driving behavior:
John’s skepticism has morphed into open conspiratorial thinking; he asserts that no major news feels organic anymore.
Highlighted distractions:
John suspects the coverage of Savannah Guthrie’s mother’s disappearance in Tucson is staged or at least used for political messaging:
The team riffs satirically about how such narratives could be twisted—parroting comparisons to previous hoaxes (e.g., Jussie Smollet).
John and the crew reject the possibility of truth from either political party, seeing everything as PR maneuvering.
Cultural Absurdity:
John acknowledges how often his skepticism has been right (Ryan Lochte, Smollett).
He reveals genuine discomfort in his own mindset shift, wishing for days when "joking around" wasn’t soured by constant distrust of all headlines.
Frequent humorous allusions to turning into Alex Jones:
The crew discuss how convenient medical solutions (Ozempic, statins, etc.) lead to widespread dependency instead of self-discipline.
John points to AI’s coming role in making us even lazier and less curious.
"They're just changing the name... now with AI..." (10:04) — John’s take on the recycling of news stories for public distraction.
“Wouldn't it be convenient to have the left media have to deal with an illegal immigrant stealing one of her family members and suddenly ICE saves the day?” (14:29) — On the politicization of Guthrie's mother’s kidnapping.
“It isn’t conspiratorial when you’re right. You’re not a conspiracy theorist anymore when you’re right.” (19:03) — John's defense of his skeptical mindset.
“Nothing seems real to me anymore, and I hate it. I’m not celebrating this new mindset. I hate it.” (27:40) — John expressing ennui about his worldview.
“This is the world we live in.” (12:13) — In response to absurd headlines about artillery shells, butt stunts, and biological oddities.
“I blame the interwebs. I blame them all.” (28:44) — John, on shifting cultural absurdities.
Running joke: John’s transformation into Alex Jones, turning “red,” hoarding urine jugs, and spouting about “gay frog sons” (39:39-44:13).