02-05-26 - Josh Wolf w/Son Jacob - Tempe Improv - In Studio

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness — Josh Wolf w/Son Jacob In Studio (Feb 5, 2026) Podcast: 98KUPD Arizona | Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo | Guests: Josh Wolf and son Jacob Wolf

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Overview

In this episode, comedian Josh Wolf joins John Holmberg and the Morning Sickness crew with his son Jacob Wolf, promoting their dual stand-up shows in Tempe and chatting about life, family, comedy, and wild stories on (and off) the road. The tone is loose, irreverent, affectionate, and extremely funny, as Holmberg and Josh riff about names, stage antics, substance-fueled shows, and father-son dynamics in the entertainment biz.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Introductions and Name Jokes

• [00:24–04:38]: Josh and Jacob are introduced, sparking a skit about Jacob's childhood and naming conventions.
  • The group jokes about the tradition of adding “Jr.” or “Sr.” to names, with Josh ribbing about how he almost named Jacob after himself.
  • Holmberg: “You’re an entertainment mullet — nepotism in the front, trafficking in the back.” (02:43)
  • Josh and Jacob riff on getting called “Wolf Jr.” and entertaining in the shadow (and favor) of a famous parent.

“Bio Mom” and Family Comedy

• [03:09–06:56]: Holmberg recalls nearly being named “Alvar Augustus Holmberg” and riffs about how much names can dictate fate.
  • Josh: “Well, you'd have been the best Dungeons & Dragons player of all time.” (05:54)
  • The group imagines what it would be like to have elaborate, stately names (with a running “bio mom” joke threading through).

Father-Son Podcast & Comedy Tour

• [09:42–10:22]: Discussion of their podcast, formerly called Hey Man, now “On the Road with Josh and Jacob.”
  • Jacob: “Basically because we’re together too much.”
  • They joke about being sick of each other offstage, saving their best material for the show.

Travel Antics & On-Tour Dynamics

• [10:46–12:01]: Classic stories of pranking each other on flights, from embarrassing sleep photos to who gets the hotel room alone.
  • Jacob: “I try to stay awake until he falls asleep first.” (10:46)
  • Josh: “He won’t sit next to me on the plane… that’s another thing when you do a show, you gotta save it.”

The Mushroom Show and Performing on Psychedelics

• [11:57–14:27]: Josh explains performing stand-up on three grams of mushrooms during a late set.
  • Josh: “Friday night, late show, I take all my three grams and I go on stage.” (12:01)
  • Jacob provides backup offstage, sometimes needing to jump in if Josh gets too “high” to function.
  • Jacob: “I went out there at one point just to settle the nerves… He’s crushing!” (14:13)

Live TV Fiascoes — Shark Week and the Tara Reid Interview

• [14:47–19:29]: Josh recounts hosting Shark After Dark and a legendary interview with Tara Reid.
  • Tara believed a “whale shark” was from a whale and a shark mating.
  • Tara Reid: “So I thought a whale shark was when a whale and a shark have sex... but it turns out one of them is an animal and one is a mammal.” (17:49)
  • Josh (on his director): “Go to break… and I basically looked at the camera like, no way am I going to break.” (19:05)

Generational Differences & Boomer Humor (Bathroom Segment)

• [21:11–23:58]: Banter about aging, incontinence, and "grandpa balls."
  • Josh: “My grandfather said once...you'll have to hold them in your hand so you don't poop on them.” (22:05)
  • Embarrassing bathroom stories, including sitting when peeing and the logistics on airplanes, get lots of laughs.

Drug Use and Sober Living Stories

• [29:54–34:14]: Open talk about experimenting with drugs, including ketamine and mushrooms.
  • Josh shares the story of the first time he and Jacob smoked weed together — at Jacob’s request on his 18th birthday.
  • Jacob: “I was a drug addict and had a gambling problem… if I have a debit card, I'm going to be out of money way faster, so I didn't have a debit card to limit my gambling.” (32:06)
  • The crew discusses Jacob’s stint in a sober home and realizing he hadn’t gone as far down the rabbit hole as some others.
  • Jacob: “14 degenerates, one house – not a terrible MTV show.” (34:02)
  • Josh: “Who stays alive the longest? Awesome watching that one.” (34:09)

Game Show Concepts & Observations about Society

• [34:24–37:28]: Holmberg pitches wild (and definitely un-airable) Japanese game show ideas.
  • “For a million dollars, guess your dad—five glory holes and out come the wieners. You pick sight, touch, or taste.” (34:24)
  • Conversation about whether men or women fall in love more easily, women’s gold-digger instincts, and social experiment show formats.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Holmberg: “You’re an entertainment mullet — nepotism in the front, trafficking in the back.” (02:43)
• Josh Wolf: “Friday night, late show, I take all my three grams and I go on stage.” (12:01)
• Jacob Wolf: “I try to stay awake until he falls asleep first. I’ve started doing the same thing.” (10:46)
• Tara Reid: “So I thought a whale shark was when a whale and a shark have sex... but it turns out one of them is an animal and one is a mammal.” (17:49)
• Holmberg: “Our grandfathers are cut from the same cloth. …I went to the bathroom at his house, and there’s this gigantic cushion… he goes, ‘I have to use that or my ball gets in the water.’” (22:05)
• Jacob Wolf: “14 degenerates, one house – not a terrible MTV show.” (34:02)
• Holmberg: “For a million dollars, guess your dad—five glory holes and out come the wieners. You pick sight, touch, or taste.” (34:24)

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Important Timestamps

• 00:24–02:00 — Opening banter, Wolf family introductions, and jokes about cussing and nicknames
• 05:01–06:56 — Holmberg’s story about "Alvar Augustus" and the existential weight of a name
• 09:42–10:22 — Explanation of their podcast ‘On The Road With Josh and Jacob’
• 12:01–14:27 — Josh performing a stand-up show on mushrooms, with Jacob as his show “spotter”
• 14:47–19:29 — Josh relives hosting Shark After Dark and the Tara Reid “whale shark” interview
• 21:11–23:58 — Bathroom humor and "grandpa stories"
• 29:54–34:14 — Candid stories about drug use, Jacob’s year in a sober house, and generational dynamics
• 34:24–37:28 — Outrageous (parody) game show concepts and musings on social observation

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Summary Highlights

• The chemistry between Josh and Jacob Wolf brings natural, rapid-fire comedy and genuine family warmth.
• Topics meander from the absurdity of names to truly bent game show concepts, but always loop back to a lighthearted, self-deprecating tone.
• Josh’s openness about performing comedy on various substances (mushrooms, ketamine) sets up honest — and hilarious — discussions about drug use and parenting.
• Jacob’s journey with addiction, gambling, and recovery is met with support and a generous dose of humor.
• Notable moments include the legendary Tara Reid live-TV gaffe and razor-sharp societal observations on how people behave when the stakes (or the money) are secret.
• The episode threads in recurring bits about “bio mom,” mock epic names, and the relatable awkwardness of getting older.

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Final Note

Fans of stand-up comedy, family storytelling, and raw, rapid banter will love this episode. Josh and Jacob’s dynamic is hilarious and relatable, with plenty of behind-the-scenes looks at both the comedy grind and the real-life challenges of staying honest, connected, and a little bit weird.

Transcript

[A]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most.

[B]

Trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition, and accessories.

[A]

Still streaming Homberg's morning sickness [e-mail]. I'm already. I'm already mad at the guest. We're on live. Careful with the mouth. Or we're all good.

[B]

But, Josh.

[C]

Yeah, the sun's cussing already.

[A]

Yeah, the sun's throwing bombs. I mean, who raised this kid? Josh Wolf is here with his son Jacob. They do their podcast together, and they're performing together at Desert Ridge Improv tonight. And of course, over the weekend, Friday and Saturday at the Tempe Improv. And we've known Josh forever. We're meeting Jacob, I think, for the first. You haven't been here before, Jacob.

[D]

No.

[B]

No, I haven't.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I thought for sure you would. I think we just watched videos.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Of the boy. I don't remember that. I'm not gonna say hey. All right.

[B]

Not at your house, right?

[C]

Well, those are separate.

[A]

It was in the car.

[C]

By the way, thanks for keeping the material coming, Jake.

[B]

I can't wait till I to tell Ben how much you loved his book.

[A]

That you left it in the studio.

[C]

It's so funny.

[A]

Everyone makes. Yeah. We have the Cash Cab trivia book we keep handy in the studio. And occasionally for light reading, we reference the quotes. He's very similar to, like, Marcus Aurelius. You go back into Ben Bailey's Cash Cab quote.

[D]

I love that show.

[A]

Oh, it's the best. The Marcus Aurelius Cash Cab would have been really funny. It just philosophized the whole thing.

[C]

He helps us break tiebreakers when we have a bet or a wager.

[A]

Yeah. We go to Cash Cab trivia.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Pretty good idea.

[D]

I love it. That's a great idea.

[A]

Everyone should always have a tiebreaker book nearby. If you have a disagreement, you just go to trivia. Whoever gets it right got the argument right.

[B]

Oh, I love that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I also love the Marcus Aurelius reference that. Four people listening.

[A]

Yeah. Nobody's gonna.

[B]

People like Marcus. Does he play for the Seahawks?

[A]

He's pretty. He's a new. Yeah. They drafted Marcus Aurelius, and he's got a senior next to his name. Marcus Aurelius Senior. Never understood that. Like, you put a senior, like.

[B]

Yeah, all you need is the junior.

[A]

The junior's the only one you need.

[B]

The OG doesn't need a sr. You.

[A]

Don'T need an sr. That's like, just extra letters just to piss the team off.

[D]

Well, because if you have a junior, you obviously. If you have a junior, you are a senior.

[A]

Correct?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I. I want you to. I was pushing for you to be Josh Junior.

[A]

Is that true?

[D]

At 18, I would have changed my name immediately. Really?

[B]

I was pushing for it and it got shot down.

[A]

Well, I bet it did, right?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

But why?

[C]

Why?

[A]

Josh is such a fine name.

[D]

Yeah. Junior isn't.

[A]

Yeah. But that's up to you to correct. But then you got to spend your whole life correcting it.

[C]

That Junior wolf.

[B]

Junior Wolf. I like that Junior wolf.

[D]

I already get called Wolf Junior the wolf cub. Yeah, that's true. Young wolf. I don't know all the things that are that. Yeah, I get all those nicknames.

[B]

Do you get called Wolf Cub?

[A]

Well, that's because your dad is human trafficking you through the entertainment industry.

[D]

Correct. Nepotism on the front. Trafficking under.

[A]

Under the table. You're an entertainment mullet. It's perfect.

[B]

I had to get him here in the back of a U Haul, everybody.

[A]

So it was thrown into the seats of your boy.

[D]

I have full blown Stockholm syndrome, though, so I'm in for it.

[A]

Well, and so Josh was. Josh was the name that mom said. No, there's only one of those. We're not doing that again.

[B]

Bio mom had a good point.

[A]

She was like, bio mom is my favorite band.

[B]

I'm picturing.

[D]

That is so funny.

[A]

I love Biome.

[D]

I love that.

[A]

Yeah. All right, go ahead. I'm sorry. I just pictured. One's a little chubby, but he's working on it.

[B]

Bio mom, they pull up in their Chrysler Pacifica.

[A]

They're exploring van. Yeah.

[B]

They got the automatic doors.

[C]

Look, it was a long night.

[A]

I got distracted by Bioma, my rector. So funny. But my mom said absolutely no double Josh.

[B]

She just was like, you know, you're. You want to be in the entertainment business.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

This. If this feels like a hard. Hard enough rock for him to climb.

[A]

Out from under Bronnie.

[B]

Yeah, good point.

[A]

Yeah, that's true.

[B]

By the way, we're the original.

[A]

Braun and Bronnie were the first guys to play NBA together. Yes. Okay, sure.

[B]

NBA 2K.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, I wonder who the first.

[A]

Father son NBA 2K game was. You have to go back in time.

[B]

To find we were the original.

[A]

You guys, I'm gonna go ahead and I'm going to run with it. It's now on a platform, a media, a podcast that is now going out to say you're the first father and son duo to play 2K live. 100% well, congratulations. That is such a bonding moment.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

Absolutely.

[D]

Absolutely appreciate it.

[A]

You know, speaking of names, my. My mom shut down my dad. Bio mom shut down my dad. Bio dad for he wanted bio uncle. He wanted Bioteo. I like to go with that.

[D]

Bioteo.

[A]

Bio son. My dad wanted to name me after his. A Swedish immigrant named Alvar Augustus Holmberg.

[B]

Oh, I wish.

[A]

And my. I know I would be dead. I would have. He would have changed his name at 18. I'd have been found in the garage going. Just swinging from the top. No way I make it through life as Alvar Augustus.

[B]

Well, let me ask you.

[C]

Bio sister got the name.

[A]

Bio sister got Dana, which is named after my dad, Dan.

[B]

That is a bummer.

[A]

Rough. So we call it Dan. I wanted a boy. Okay. Yes.

[C]

He was the first.

[A]

And. And getting to know her through these many, many years. I'm sure he still wishes she wasn't here. I know I do. But anyway, Dan, I could do without it. She's Canadian, but yeah, I mean, it's weird how your name can change your entire, like, path.

[B]

Would you have gone because. Would you have gone with Alvar? Would you have gone with Augusta?

[C]

It would have been Al.

[A]

Al.

[B]

Would you have gone with aa?

[A]

I would have gone to aa.

[B]

Yeah. You would have had to learn how to fight.

[A]

Oh, man.

[B]

Either that or you would have been the best Dungeons and Dragons player of all time.

[D]

Dude, the best Dungeon Master ever.

[C]

With that.

[D]

Are you kidding me?

[A]

Augustus?

[B]

You would have worn, like, a Thorn crown.

[A]

I would have had to, like, the brain. The brain I have now could do it. Yeah. The child's brain couldn't. I would wander into every room dressed as the guy from the JG Wentworth commercial. I am Alvar Augustus. And they'd be like, this guy right here.

[B]

But you know what have been great if dinner reservations, when they call out, you would have made them call out your full name.

[A]

All of it.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'd have stood up with my scepter because you can't not have it.

[C]

Imagine how hammered it would be on a Starbucks cup.

[B]

I mean, they would have hated.

[D]

Or dude, if you customize your own sports jersey, it would have to start at the bottom and just go like.

[C]

A rainbow all the way.

[A]

Yeah, I like the idea of having my name over it. Like raising canes. Alva Augusta's. Am I saying that right? That's a name tipping people in gold. Smoke detector. I was gonna say.

[D]

Was that a smoke detector?

[A]

Yeah, it's just a stereotype we love.

[D]

No, I. Trust me, I I sit and play video games with my friends all day, and they're. We're all stream. So they all have steam decks where you can put sound effects. And half of them are all in stereotypes. Yeah.

[C]

So.

[D]

So I will play one on my computer and play a smoke detector and be like, hey, Evan, go check your smoke detector.

[A]

So good.

[D]

It's the best.

[C]

So the. The stere behind it, what you point.

[D]

To me for is you playing all the time.

[A]

I didn't make him do it. What do you point me? He pointed to me like, oh, you guys are the first NBA 2K. Father, son. Evidently. I invented the smoke detector. That's my work, my legacy. Alvar Augustus Hberg's gift to the world.

[B]

I will never forget that name.

[A]

Yeah, it's a top. Well, my grandpa who had it had polio and, like, couldn't move his right arm hardly at all. But still. Strongest man I ever met. I'm like, well, that's the guy that needs to hold on to this is.

[B]

But p s him in a him and a toga with his arm like this kind of tracks.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

You know what I mean? You know, holding like, early on, he.

[D]

Could add a pizza drinking out of a goblet. It does sound like a game of thrones name. He does sound like he's the king of the north.

[A]

One of the families. The white walkers are coming. I love that.

[B]

Enjoy my buffet.

[D]

That's right.

[A]

You get a job at Caesar's palace. Considering little Caesar over here, he's never.

[B]

Worn pants in his life. Look at this guy. This is the body type of a man who's never worn long pants.

[A]

No, he had. Yeah, he looks funny in him too.

[C]

Shorts sometimes are long pants.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Bermudas.

[A]

One buffet.

[D]

I was gonna say capris are for sure pants for you.

[A]

Yeah. Well, that's what his shorts become.

[B]

You do look like a guy who. Who, like, holds the bottom trail of Alvar Augustus's long toe.

[D]

But he holds the key right behind him.

[A]

He's cherubic, but he's also. He's handy around the ca.

[B]

Every one step of yours is like three of his with those little legs. Scatter behind him.

[A]

Sir. It is taking us so, so long to get somewhere.

[B]

I'm sorry. May I have some water, please?

[D]

Bunny cartoon with his feet.

[A]

Ding, ding, ding, ding. We must stop for provisions.

[B]

He's on the back of the wood car.

[A]

I would also as Alvar Augustus Hberg now that we've hired Brady to be my train holder, I would also hire a guy who who's got, like, a little mandolin or something behind him. And with each step, you hear, like, those little noises that.

[B]

You have a job.

[A]

Yeah. Congratulations. You better learn how to do Brady's footsteps in Foley work.

[D]

Honestly, I feel like mandolin's funny, but I feel like we'll throw it off into a tuba. Might be also.

[A]

Well, I mean, then we're getting into baby elephant walk now. It's just offensive. What is the name of your podcast you guys do together?

[B]

Well, we changed it. We were doing a show called hey man, and now we do something called on the Road with Josh and Jacob, and we do it live every weekend, and mostly because we're together too much.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Correct.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

Jacob, would you like to run with that? You want to talk to me?

[B]

I'll say things because we both live in Vegas, and I'll say things to him like, hey, you want to come over? He's like, no, I see you a lot.

[D]

I'm like, dude, I'll see you tomorrow at 6am for our flight.

[A]

Get out of here. Miserable.

[B]

He won't sit next to me on the plane.

[A]

Well, no, he's got to. And that's another thing. When you do a show, it's hard. Like, everybody thinks that Brady and Brett and I are on the phone together all the time. You gotta save it.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

So if you start having fun on the plane, it's like, ah, nuts. This is, like, all stuff we could be doing.

[B]

But also because he knows that I'll take pictures of him with his mouth open and Photoshop things going in and out of it.

[A]

Most dads do that.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

I've started taking up. Taking a page out of his book. And when we sit next to each other on early morning flights, I try to stay awake until he falls asleep first. And so I've started doing the same thing.

[A]

I fall asleep like this. Hold on.

[B]

But also have these glasses on.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I fall asleep like this.

[A]

With your mouth wide open.

[D]

I have a recent one. I'll show you guys a picture when we go to break.

[A]

So you're just getting dongs in that? Like, 100%.

[D]

100%.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

But also. Yeah. So I take a page out of his book. But also when we're in the hotel also, he doesn't. He does like to screw with me, so he doesn't let me get my own hotel room.

[A]

I sleep with that.

[D]

Yeah. So he's gonna name the. He wants to rename the tour One room, two beds. So there's.

[A]

That begs the question. Yeah, you're on the road.

[B]

We're both in relationship. Yeah.

[A]

Crying out loud. What are you, you Josh. Sure. You've been at it for a long time.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're coming up through the ranks and you're dragging, dragging squish along with you. Junior.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Get your own hotel room. Take advantage of the stage time.

[B]

See, that's the thing.

[D]

I've been in a relationship for five and so I'm. We live in a, live in a house in Vegas.

[B]

I need someone to take care of me when I'm on mushrooms.

[A]

Oh, I've heard about this. Yes, but you had them on the stage where you had to go away.

[B]

I, I, oh, yeah. You do a whole show still three grams. Friday night, late show. I take all on my three grams and I go on stage.

[A]

It's a, it's a super dose. And then you go on stage and try to do your act or just see what happens. Both. Both. Morning S98.

[E]

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[A]

Morning sickness, definitely.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then Jacob's there.

[D]

I'm there for moral support and actual support.

[A]

Also as power of attorney in case we need to go to the hospital. Like somebody's gotta be your mouth. You gotta have a family member there for that.

[C]

Yes, correct.

[B]

A couple weeks ago, I was higher than I've ever been in my life on stage. And I made him stand by the stage. I go, don't go anywhere. I might need you.

[A]

No kidding.

[B]

So he stood there, and every now and then I'd be like, come up here.

[A]

I'm feeling a little uneasy.

[B]

And he'd walk on stage and just stand up there with me.

[A]

Oh, I was, what's going on in your head? Do you remember it? Is it like.

[B]

That was the first show, and I've been doing this a long time, so two weeks ago was the first show I've ever done that I don't remember a second of it because it just.

[A]

Gotcha.

[B]

It got me.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

I'll tell you one thing, though. Crushed.

[A]

He's killed it.

[D]

He crushed.

[A]

No kidding.

[D]

I went up there because he was like, I don't know how I've been doing it. And he kept saying, I have never been higher on stage. And I went out there at one point just to settle the nerves, and I went, hey, say whatever you want. But I turned to the crowd and I go, go. He's crushing. They just.

[C]

They.

[D]

They erupted. So. Yeah, man.

[A]

Like, is that a proud moment of your father like that? Because I. My dad was ever caked out of his brain, it would be like, oh, boy. It's a different mix.

[D]

It is a different mix. Because, I mean, I feel like I'm in a comfortable room. We're one of the own. We're degenerates. Being this guy together.

[A]

Well, he raised one.

[B]

Well, yeah, you're welcome. Yeah, absolutely.

[A]

He's a functioning degenerate.

[D]

Welcome.

[A]

100%. We've known Josh for a long time. He hosted something called Shark Week once. Shark.

[B]

After D. I worked that show.

[A]

You did? Yeah. You're partially responsible for that nightmare I had to sit through a couple of times. You're welcome. And I liked. I liked Josh. Great. I liked you. And then I. I. Because as a host of something, you realize sometimes when someone else is controlling the show for a little bit. And they made you do the Moonshiner interview, which I never let you forget. And then the. The pickle and all the people that came into. And I felt bad because you were doing all that work to promote the other shows on this. On this horrible thing that was going on. And then that dude in the shark outfit, and I'm like, hey, that was me. Was only for one of them.

[D]

Only for one of them. Shark. Shout out. Bob Oshack. Love him. But, yeah, there was one Episode where it was him and me. And then there was a guy. There's a boy band called the Wanted. There was a guy from that band who came in and sang, like, a song. I was the original left Shark before Katy Perry's Left Shark. I want everybody to know that she did steal it from me.

[A]

That always made me laugh because I watched a man go out there and go, I'm gonna give it my all.

[C]

100.

[A]

And he did. And then the rest of the show, I'm like, I don't know why they keep throwing this at this poor man. He is killing it amongst this nightmare of suits and executives that are trying as hard as they can to make this bad.

[B]

Can I tell you what I love the most about that and what I love the most about this? I love live.

[A]

Oh, me too.

[B]

I love. And that was the first live talk show.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so I love that. Walking on the Tightrope. And there were times where I was allowed because it was live. Not allowed, but I could. Where they couldn't. They could say something to me in my ear.

[A]

Just ignore it.

[B]

But I was like, hey, the cameras are on.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So what are you gonna do? Turn off the network?

[A]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

And there was one we did an interview with.

[A]

So then you put your wiener in his mouth and, like, drew a picture in the thing. It's like, yeah, we're gonna do it.

[D]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

The one that you had handy is what I was saying.

[D]

Which also could be his, by the way, which is strange. You should probably just stop while you're ahead.

[A]

I don't know that I was ever ahead in that one.

[B]

Alvar Augustus ever stops. He's full speed ahead.

[A]

Never tell Alvar to.

[B]

There was my favorite moment from that show.

[D]

I know what it is.

[B]

I was interviewing Tara Reid in Ian's earring. They were doing what was the sharknado. And Tara had. Tara had taken, I don't know, what. Pills, something and smoke and sipping wine. When I was backstage, kind of. Kind of briefing around with the show was I saw her taking the pill and drinking some wine, taking the pillow drinkers. I'm on. And we get out on the. And this clip is online.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

It needs to go viral. You need to bring it back.

[B]

We get out on the show and we're talking about it, and she said, I'm gonna. I'm gonna. It's been so long since I saw. But basically what happened was she said to me, you know, I did some research, and I didn't want to, you know, seem stupid when I Came out here and she was like, so. And I thought a whale shark was when a shark and a whale had sex.

[A]

All right, I'll give her that one. Yeah.

[B]

She goes, but it turns out one of them is an animal and one of them is a mammal.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And they don't. And we were like, we'll be right back. Yeah.

[D]

The best part of the clip, which is, honestly, it's so iconic because the more she starts talking, the camera cuts between her and then him. So it's her doing that, and then it's my dad doing this.

[A]

His mouth is wide open.

[B]

She starts to go down this and starts talking about, oh, you got it.

[C]

I think she'.

[D]

Start, oh, my God.

[A]

Whale sharks.

[F]

I'm like, oh, that must mean a whale and a shark have sex. And then I think, well, how do. How does a whale and a shark have sex?

[B]

And I Look, was there a video of it?

[F]

No, because there's a thing called whale sharks. So I thought they must, you know, and whales are mammals and sharks are animals. They have nothing to do with each other.

[B]

You ever see a tiger shark?

[F]

So basically, the dolphins have sex with each other, but the sharks don't. So I thought, then how is it such a thing? But the difference is, there's whale shark. He's the biggest shark in the ocean, but he's also.

[A]

My career's over. No.

[B]

In my ear, as she keeps talking, the director's going, go to break, go.

[A]

To break, go to break.

[B]

And I'm looking right at the camera. I'm looking right at the camera. And I. Basically, my look at the camera was, no way am I going to break.

[C]

This is the moment she and Ian is seeing it as well.

[B]

Yeah. She goes, dude, I. And I asked him afterwards. He was like, I've been doing this press tour. He was like, this is. I just sit back and kind of let it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

After the show, my friend Paul De Gelder, who lost his hand, his arm and his leg to a shark attack.

[D]

Bull shark. He's like an Australian Navy Seal.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And we watched the video of him getting eaten. He's. Because it was a training. So the Australians were videoing it to make sure that they could do whatever training. So you see him get pulled under.

[C]

Wasn't it like, in a pier area, like off the.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. No, it was a little bit in the. In, out.

[D]

A little bit.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And so you see him get pulled under, come back up. He said he tried to swim back to the boat, but when he went like this, he didn't have an arm. And so. But after the show, she says to him, because he was wearing. He had his. He has prosthetics, and he had his glove on. And she goes, why you wear a glove?

[A]

After he told the story, he was right there on the couch.

[B]

He was like, oh, I got bit by a shark. And she goes, why'd you do that?

[A]

And he was like, oh, my God.

[B]

I didn't. That wasn't the goal to get Josh.

[A]

We had Ayan and Tara on this show. And my simple question, because it had just happened to her, I'm like, how do you walk through any sort of red carpet and not know your breast is not in your clothes anymore? How do you not know? And Ian breaks in, and then she did this, and I. And I immediately ended the interview. You're gonna listen to this. This is a classic quote from this show. Let's talk about Sharknado. Let's not. And then I just hung up. I'm like, if you're not gonna. If you're not gonna tell me what. Nobody cares about Sharknado as much as. Remember a week ago when you didn't know your boob was out? Do you not feel wind or air on the nipples like every other part?

[B]

If I had one nut out, oh, I would be like, that feels different.

[A]

If I had a nut out of my underwear and I still had pants on, I'd be like, oh, we got one. Creeping out of the first part.

[B]

It happens. I'm at an age now where they might. They might honestly do. Sometimes they split like Yosemite Sam.

[A]

Oh, my. Are you in the water? Are you. Oh, my God. How old are you? 56, 53. Are you in the water yet? Am I what? Are you in the water yet? No, no, I've been in there for about 10 years. No, I just have to do this weird tail hook thing and get it up on my thigh.

[B]

Can I tell you something crazy? My grandfather said one once, okay? I was 8. He sat down in the front seat, right? And I was in the back seat. And he go. He sits down and he goes, whoop. And I go, oh, what's happened?

[A]

Sat him a ball.

[B]

And he goes, oh, I just sat on my nuts and I was eight in my. You know, I don't have any pebbles. I was like, what? And he goes, no, it's going to happen to you someday.

[A]

And I go, no.

[B]

And he goes, wait till you get older. And you have to hold them in your hand so you don't poop on them.

[A]

Our grandfathers. Our grandfathers are a cut from the same cloth. I went to the bathroom at his house. House, and there was this gigantic cushion on the thing. I'm like, what's with the cushion on the thing? He goes, I have to use that or my ball to get in the water. And we were watching a White Sox game, and I'm looking at the tv, and my stomach's like, oh, because you mentally just go to Grandpa balls.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that's deep. And then he's staring at me, and I can feel him, and he goes, that's your future.

[D]

Oh, no.

[A]

Like, you cursed me with it. And then in my 40s, I'm in the water. Yeah. I got a long. But it's not big balls. That's the worst ball apart, it's like a giant. Like a. Like a Safeway bag with, like, just a two grapes. They gave me too big a bag.

[D]

It's like the. It's like the fake pair from Jackass. When Johnny Knoxville. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You know, in the safe way when you only get, like, gum and they give you the whole bag. Yeah.

[D]

It's just like, two avocados at the.

[A]

Bottom of a. I wish it was avocado. The pits, for God's sake.

[B]

It's just.

[A]

And I remember hitting the water. I'm like, what the. And. And I pinky swung it up, up, and my boys were down there. And I'm like, these things are getting out of control, and it's not getting any better.

[B]

The first time they dropped, was the water already muddied.

[A]

Well, I have actually had a log. I'm going to do a little hand thing so they don't drown sometimes. And I have gone a little Mark Twain down the river a couple of times. Let her ride. There are times that I'll be going. So the right hand will represent the feces, the left hand will represent the scrotum. And as it clips, it falls forward and rubs down.

[B]

Can do me a favor?

[A]

Show you that?

[B]

No.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

No, thanks.

[B]

Can you do me a favor, just so I know?

[A]

Put.

[B]

Drop them in the water and flush and see how much of a pull?

[D]

Yeah, I.

[A]

Just curious.

[C]

There's no way you do that in a airplane.

[E]

No.

[A]

Do it. Oh, no, no, no, no.

[B]

Who poops on the airplane?

[C]

He sits when he pees.

[A]

I sit when I pee, but not in the airplane.

[B]

Start deflecting, you know?

[C]

Thank you, Josh.

[D]

On an airplane. I got you, dude. A dude's got to do what a.

[B]

Dude'S got to do.

[A]

I'm with you.

[D]

I'm with you.

[A]

Though untrained degenerates. And you on on airplanes.

[B]

You don't put me on the airplane.

[D]

I'm sober, living trained. I look very good degenerate. Thank you very much.

[C]

First of all, when you ever pooped on a plane.

[B]

Okay, I was going to ask you if your feet touched.

[A]

That is not what I was expecting. Do you sit on the. Do you. You made me picture it.

[C]

Damn it.

[B]

Cuz it's when you swing your leg.

[C]

No one can swing their leg legs in there.

[A]

It's too small to bring your pot of honey. And also we've recently but you're right.

[C]

Not a fan of a high toilet seat.

[A]

No, you will. Yeah, but that sounds freeing to have your legs swinging free. There's Brady the Pooh. We've been recently discovering how similar these two are.

[B]

Hilarious. That is crazy.

[A]

The Pooh is happening right in front of us.

[B]

Why doesn't he have a belly button though?

[A]

Do bears normally have a belly button? I don't think there's umbilical cords on bears. Honestly, that's a great not to scientifically destroy the laugh.

[B]

Are we dissecting jokes? I mean honestly.

[A]

Fact check. Yeah, that was very.

[C]

Football's biggest game is right in front of us. And you've still got time to get in on the action with Underdog. It's Brady from the morning sickness. And playing on Underdog is so easy. Go to the app. Pick players to go higher or lower on stats and if your picks are right, you could win 5,000 times your money. I'm going to go higher on Sam Darnold passing yards. So download the Underdog app today and use promo code HMS to score $75 in fantasy bonus entries when you play your first $5 underdog make picks win money must be 18 19 in Alabama and Nebraska, 19 in Colorado for some games, 21+ in Arizona, Massachusetts and Virginia and present in state where Underdog Fantasy operates. Terms apply. See assets.underdogfantasy.com web play and getterms/dfs ML for details. Offer not valid in Maryland, Michigan, New Jersey, New York, Ohio and Pennsylvania. Insert with your play. Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit www.ncpgambling.org. in New York, call the 24.7Hope line at 1-877-8-HOPE NY or text HOPE NY to 467369.

[A]

Holmberg's Morning Sickness.

[D]

I mean honestly, I call that point. I've never even thought about that.

[A]

AI says I call that Dickopedia. Yeah, actually. But I like but you asked the question, and my brain knew the answer.

[D]

That's actually a good point. I've never about that.

[A]

As to why the bare umbilical. Yeah, he talks and he has a T shirt. We're past that now. We're getting into weather night. He's coming. That's a good point. Also another one.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, we could. We could work around.

[D]

He makes a pretty good. He makes a pretty strong point.

[A]

So when it comes to Winnie the Pooh, I've studied quite a bit of the anatomies of all of them. Still mad at him for the hard R on ticker. Josh Wolves at the Desert Ridge Improv tonight with Jacob. And tomorrow at Tempe Improv from Friday and Saturday. He'll be down [e-mail] you want to grab those tickets? What else?

[B]

Mushroom show.

[A]

And that is the nine that you do Friday after 9:30.

[B]

Friday show late night is the mushroom.

[A]

So you do 7 and 9:30, then mushrooms or 9:30, 9:30 mushroom show.

[C]

You're doing two a weekend.

[B]

One mushroom show.

[A]

Friday night, the seventh show. Yes, it's solid.

[D]

All the shows are solid.

[A]

But nine, like, if I'm buying tickets, if you.

[D]

If you want to come see a show you've never seen before, I would say come see the mushroom. But I also want to say if you want to come see a show you've never had so much fun at, come see any of our shows.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Honestly, man, if this, if the mushroom show, if the audience didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't do it.

[D]

Of course.

[B]

Right, right.

[D]

So.

[B]

But it is like, it's just a little looser. Yeah. You know.

[A]

Have you dabbled in other drug shows?

[B]

Yeah, you know, ketamine show, maybe Ketamine shows. So disassociated a little bit.

[D]

We haven't done. He hasn't done that one yet, but he did do it on the trail end of some. Some acid in Portland.

[B]

In Atlanta. I was pretty high.

[D]

Oh, that's right. Yeah.

[A]

I forgot. I love family reunions.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

That is just high all the time.

[B]

It's wonderful.

[C]

You held my train.

[A]

I would like the Hiahuasa dark show where you just have candles around you.

[B]

Amazing. Honestly, dude, the ketamine show feels like one I would do in a corner facing the wall, Blair Winch style.

[A]

Dude, it. Let's just run down all of them. If you're willing to be the. The lab monkey, let's get you on stage on all of it.

[B]

I do have ketamine lollipops.

[A]

Is that real? Oh, yeah. I learned that phrase right now.

[B]

Is that real?

[A]

Never knew. No, no, I knew that.

[B]

I was like, where you been, dude?

[A]

You talk a lot. Not today. Never heard that phrase and it fell out of my own mouth. What does it mean?

[D]

So, yeah. Ketamine lollipop.

[A]

Yeah. I didn't know those were.

[D]

Dude, we were in Philadelphia, and then we are. Our plane had gotten delayed for like four hours.

[A]

We were in the air.

[D]

We were in the hotel until like 2:30 or 3.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

And I'm like, cool, I'll chill here. And he goes, cool, I'm gonna go walk around. And then I. He goes. I get a phone call an hour later, and he goes, hey, what are you doing?

[A]

I'm flying a plane.

[D]

I go, just in the hotel room. He goes, cool. I found a ketamine lollipop in my jacket. Need you to come get me. And I was like, where you're at? And he goes, that's the best part. No idea. I was like, wow, you're in downtown Philadelphia.

[B]

I told them my landmarks. I'm like, I'm near a sneaker store.

[A]

I think I'm at Rocky's house.

[B]

It was the first. It was the first time I'd ever done ketamine.

[D]

Wow.

[B]

And it was a 500 milligram lollipop. And it tasted good. So I was like, well, if it tastes good, it can't be too strong.

[A]

Sure.

[D]

That's what they're the strongest, by the way. If it tastes good, if. If your drugs taste good, they're way too strong.

[A]

I promise you, Josh, as not a good rule. Like, you're open about all this stuff. When was it okay for Jacob to start dying? Dabbling?

[B]

When he was a grown up.

[A]

No. No kidding. So, like, when I was a kid, he comes home, he's like, you do it all the time. Like, you weren't like micro dosing with him or anything?

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[A]

When did, when did you first share your first let's do this together moment?

[D]

Oh. Oh, my 18th birthday. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, was it? But you had already done it.

[D]

Well, I, I. Well, this was when it came to smoking weed. I was smoking weed through high school. I'd never done a hallucinogen, really, until I was like, 18.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

But for my 18th birthday, because we grew up in California, we'd have been, I felt like legal my entire life. And I asked him for my 18th birthday if we could roll a joint and smoke and walk around our.

[A]

Don't have to ask him twice.

[D]

Yeah, well, got two rolled already. But you know who we did have to ask twice was my mom. He was like, hey, just check this out.

[A]

Mom was not happy with this.

[D]

No, mom was okay with you.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And so we did. But, you know, now thinking back at the park that we were at in.

[A]

California, she went outside and did it.

[B]

We walked around the park.

[C]

For sure.

[B]

That's sort of homeless. They thought he was my twink, for sure. Yeah.

[D]

They were like, look at that old guy.

[A]

He's pulling in some good.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure.

[C]

Usda.

[A]

You guys got so high you started blowing each other. It was like, come on, how far are we gonna take?

[C]

That's why I don't like weed.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm not sure if you've ever smoked weed, but. No weed has ever made me want to do that.

[A]

I wall up every time. I'm like a potato bug. I'm going down on me. That stuff is fantastic.

[B]

Down on me.

[A]

Biomom. Their second. It was their second. It wasn't as good as the first one.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. But then that. And then we. We did some mushrooms, a little bit, like. But then I. I just all around just kind of stopped doing hallucinogens or anything more than smoking.

[A]

Why?

[D]

I'm a degenerate.

[A]

Oh. Cause you. Oh, you took it too far.

[D]

Well, I had a. I had what you like to call a problem.

[A]

Oh, I remember. Yeah. Josh told us about that. That's right.

[D]

So I had a little bit of an issue with. With the booger sugar and drinking cocaine. Yeah. For a good year, I was on it real strong. No kidding. I was looking through my bank statements the other day from that year. Oh, my God. I really, really.

[A]

A lot of withdrawals.

[D]

Dud.

[A]

Lot of withdrawals.

[D]

It wasn't withdrawals because I didn't have an. I didn't have a. A debit card for two years because I lost it and. And we moved.

[B]

You know, you can get a new one.

[A]

Yeah, they give them out.

[B]

Well, you should.

[A]

You should.

[D]

You should listen to my reason. Okay. I was a drug addict and had a gambling problem. So I was like, if I have a debit card, I'm going to be out of money way faster. So I didn't have a debit card to limit my gambling.

[B]

Smart thinking.

[A]

Hey. Well, you know what? You were on the right track.

[D]

And, yeah, kind of.

[B]

I'm not sure why you had to go to sober. L. You had it all under control.

[D]

Well, that was for you. I don't know why you sent me that.

[B]

Do you know why? I knew the F word was going to come out. It's still. There aren't too many things we argue about. Me and my wife sending him to sober living. Oh, yeah. Is top of the list.

[A]

No kidding. Do you regret it?

[D]

I was going to say regret.

[A]

Would you miss it?

[D]

Do I miss it? I mean, look, I'm not going to tell anyone not to do it because I had a great time doing it.

[A]

So, you know, it's a good sell.

[D]

It would be a hypocritical. Hypocritical thing for me to do.

[A]

It seems fun in moderation.

[D]

It was fun. I'll be so honest. I did have an absolute ball doing it.

[A]

Right.

[D]

Not my bank account, though, for sure. But no, I just got too out of hand, truthfully, like. And I also didn't know a couple things about Biomom that made me predisposed to it, which I didn't know until I was already in. Which I was. I didn't know until I was already in what I call sober living. The nuthouse. Because I was living with 14 degenerates under one roof. So when you hear me say the.

[B]

Nut house, that's what I made you.

[C]

Feel better, in a way.

[D]

Did what?

[C]

Oh, the fact that the other roommates.

[A]

Like, oh, yeah, one of these people.

[D]

Well, because I was only in it for a year. And I say only because I. In those AA meetings and in those rooms, I was like, People are like, I've been doing it for 20 years and I lost everything and I don't have a family anymore. And I'm like, oh, I, I, I, I. It's not that I don't belong here, here. But I. I'm not in this group of people.

[A]

You guys are losers.

[D]

You guys are insane.

[A]

I'm leaving.

[D]

And also the most boring group of people I've ever met in my entire life. Like, those rooms were. It was. I was. No wonder you guys did drugs and drank. You're so boring now.

[B]

Like, God, 14 degenerates, one house. Who stays alive the longest? Not a terrible MTV show.

[A]

Awesome watching that one. Yeah.

[D]

I mean, great idea.

[A]

Whatever they call.

[D]

I was gonna say tubi.

[A]

Yeah, Tubi might be another one. Yeah, it's like Philo. They'll show that. That's a great idea. I have a great idea for a game show.

[B]

Let's hear it.

[A]

It's been horrible. And I've been trying to pitch this for years. You know, Japanese game shows are crazy, amazing.

[D]

The best.

[A]

So we get one. Because porn, I love that. And they say write what you know. And I like game shows. I watch a buzzer network a lot and I watch old game shows. So I did a thing called for a million dollars, guess your dad. And then it's five glory holes and out come the wieners. And you can choose for your dollar value, sight, touch or taste. Get it? Then you play guess your mom for double the money. Same deal.

[B]

I mean, just thinking that you can push your vagina through a hole.

[A]

We'll just put it up against glass like one of those fish.

[B]

Are they gonna have to have an Audi? One of those Homer Simpson.

[A]

But what would be the real problem with that game isn't that it's happening. Is it that you're pretty sure you know?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like is there some sort of magnetic similarities? Yeah, not, not. Not necessarily. But like is there some sort of telepathic thing? Innate telepathic moment where you're like, that's.

[C]

You're drawn to that or you're drawn.

[D]

To the hormones and the pheromones.

[A]

I have that same birthmark. Oh man. I know that that would be a.

[B]

Bummer if you were like, oh no, that's on my face. That birth.

[A]

My host would have million. Why do you think it's is number three?

[B]

Oh, you went with.

[A]

Of course I did.

[D]

I think for the mom segment I would just put five different fish in the glory hill.

[A]

That's not.

[D]

And just let. Yeah. And just be like jokes on you. None of them are your mother.

[A]

My other game show I have, which I think is brilliant because I have always said men are more romantic than women. Because we would go to a Burger King and fall in love with somebody behind the counter. Woman would never do that.

[B]

True.

[A]

Even if it's the most handsome man in the world. He's working at Burger King. She's already dismissed him. We will do that. We'll take the poor. The pretty woman is the poor girl on the road. She just. We fell in love. Right. So you tell women that there is a billionaire in your life today somewhere just to see how they behave. By the way, this is a great. Take them to discount tire and see how dudes who. Who are just on the show making minimum wage get treated by models.

[B]

See how many people at AutoZone get blowjobs.

[A]

Oh yeah, it is. Yeah.

[B]

You know, I'd love to take you in the.

[C]

Well, it's all about how they behave.

[A]

Around how the behavior changes when you're not sure who the billionaire is. But you've got to do these mundane.

[C]

T send figure out who it is.

[A]

And one of them's going to have a billion dollars in his hands and you don't know which one.

[B]

This is actually a really good idea.

[A]

It's better than my guess your dad game. Yeah.

[D]

I mean, probably more.

[B]

More marketable for sure.

[D]

Maybe opens up more platform.

[A]

Have you seen the Internet?

[B]

Yeah. I mean, honestly, have you guessed your dad? Feels like a Saudi Arabia type show.

[A]

It's an exposure of. Of societal behaviors that no one likes to tell.

[D]

Interesting. Have you guessed your dad and have you guessed your mom? Feels very Alabama. I feel.

[A]

Oh, oh, it got an audience. Look, there's a target. Like, I can mark it. We Mountain Dew and like, like Code red.

[E]

Code red.

[D]

Make sure it's code red.

[A]

All right.

[D]

Get it right and trade them.

[A]

All right, the wolves are here. We gotta go. I saw you coming. I already looked at the clock. Josh is here. Jacob's here. Josh, that's our producer, the clock manager. I thought podcasts were st. See, we're taping our podcast live on the radio. That's how I look at this.

[B]

Got it, got it.

[A]

Got so we still get stuck on.

[B]

So when he comes out from the booth, he's like.

[A]

He's usually here to ruin things. Success. Josh Wolf, Desert Ridge Improv tonight, Tempe Improv tomorrow and Saturday. If you want to go see him. Comedian Josh Wolf. Dot com is where you go. It's 98, Arizona's most powerful rock media station. He said fully erect.