02-06-23 - Gonna Have Craig Gass Come In All Week - We Shot Down The Chinese Balloon Finally And It Fell Into The Atlantic - Kari Lake Tweets Pic Of Her w/Shotgun So We Bring In Macho Kari Lake

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: "Gonna Have Craig Gass Come In All Week - We Shot Down The Chinese Balloon Finally And It Fell Into The Atlantic - Kari Lake Tweets Pic Of Her w/Shotgun So We Bring In Macho Kari Lake"
Release Date: February 6, 2023
Host: Brad Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Guest: Craig Gass

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Introduction and Event Updates (00:00 - 03:07)

The episode kicks off with Brad Holmberg promoting local businesses and upcoming comedy events in the Valley. Highlights include performances at Desert Ridge Improv with guests like Tom Arnold and Frank Caliendo, as well as stand-up shows featuring comedians such as Tony Baker and Dan Levy.

Notable Quote:

Brad Holmberg (00:23): “You’ve had barbecue before, but you haven’t had it this good.”

Craig Gass Takes the Spotlight (03:07 - 05:12)

Brad transitions to discussing the arrival of Craig Gass for the Super Bowl festivities. He shares amusing anecdotes about Craig’s knack for sneaking into high-profile events, highlighting his resourcefulness and charm. Brad recounts Craig’s infiltration of a Finals game suite without a ticket, impressing everyone with cookies already on hand.

Notable Quote:

Brad Holmberg (03:40): “Craig Gass is part of Chicago Cubs history and lore because one of the shots is of Eddie Vedder, Bill Murray, Bonnie Hunt, and a bunch of other celebrities sitting there cheering longtime Cub fans. And there's crying dipstick Craig Gass standing there with his phone right in the middle of the mix because a guy recognized, hey, you're the guy.”

Super Bowl Preparations and Balloon Incident (05:12 - 16:38)

The hosts delve into the recent event of shooting down a Chinese balloon that unexpectedly fell into the Atlantic. They critique the government's handling of the situation, questioning the transparency and responsiveness surrounding the incident. The conversation humorously speculates on the contents of the balloon and envisions exaggerated scenarios of how its deflation affected the environment.

Notable Quotes:

Brad Holmberg (09:28): “We shot down the balloon. I'm very excited about the balloon being shot down because it adds to the story.”

Craig Gass (13:37): “Bob, you take it down, man, you take down China for all us in the Palmetto State.”

Brad and co-hosts express skepticism about the government's narrative, suggesting that the swift decision to shoot down the balloon might indicate prior knowledge of multiple balloons and hinting at possible ulterior motives.

Macho Kari Lake Segment (18:18 - 31:07)

The episode introduces "Macho Kari Lake," a parody character based on Kari Lake's controversial tweets depicting her with a shotgun targeting balloons. The co-hosts humorously portray Kari Lake as an over-the-top vigilante determined to eliminate perceived threats from the sky.

Notable Quotes:

Brad Holmberg (18:34): “We need to turn her loose this week.”

Craig Gass (28:12): “I was shooting at the balloon. And you might notice, Brady, that there's no more balloons to worry about. I plugged it. I was shooting high and hard and got her out, baby.”

The segment exaggerates Kari Lake’s persona, blending satire with current political discourse, and showcases the show's signature humor in addressing local and national issues.

Mountain Rescue and Local Hiking Stories (31:07 - 35:39)

Brad shares anecdotes from local mountain biking trails, emphasizing the challenges faced by out-of-towners unfamiliar with the terrain. He vividly describes encounters with lost hikers from Philadelphia, highlighting their struggles and the hosts' amusement at their predicament.

Notable Quote:

Brad Holmberg (21:43): “I saw two guys on bikes that were rented were on top of a hill... He was scared to death... 'I'm lost.'”

The discussion reflects on the unique aspects of Arizona's outdoor activities and the humorous side of assisting inexperienced hikers.

Cityscape and Homelessness Issues (35:39 - 37:19)

The conversation shifts to Arizona's skyline and urban planning, with Brad defending the city's understated architecture while mocking criticisms from residents of other cities. The hosts also touch upon the ongoing efforts to manage homelessness, critiquing the city's strategies and sharing personal observations about changes in public spaces.

Notable Quote:

Brad Holmberg (35:39): “But san Francisco's a decent group. They're a bunch of liberal weirdos. But the good ones would have shown up. And they want to go home.”

Community Engagement and Listener Feedback (37:19 - 42:50)

Listeners are engaged through shout-outs and advertisements, with Brad reading a heartfelt testimonial from Ben Roberson praising the show's impact. Brad humorously responds to the praise by referencing a neighbor who renamed himself after the podcast, showcasing the strong community connection and the show's influence.

Notable Quote:

Ben Roberson (41:57): “You're an everyday reminder to me that someone does. Respectfully, Ben Roberson, Ben Robinson, you are an early candidate for listener of the year.”

Closing Remarks and Final Thoughts (42:50 - End)

As the episode wraps up, Brad and the co-hosts reflect on the week’s events and tease upcoming segments. They maintain their humorous tone while addressing serious topics, ensuring listeners are left entertained and informed.

Notable Quote:

Brad Holmberg (42:52): “Yeah, well, hard-hitting journalism when they're trying to take a guy down and not know his name immediately makes all your facts questionable.”

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Key Takeaways:

• Craig Gass's Charisma: Craig Gass is celebrated for his ability to infiltrate high-profile events effortlessly, adding a dynamic element to the show’s coverage of the Super Bowl.

• Balloon Controversy: The episode critically examines the government's decision to shoot down a Chinese balloon, questioning motives and transparency while entertaining listeners with speculative humor.

• Macho Kari Lake Parody: A satirical portrayal of Kari Lake emphasizes the show's penchant for blending political commentary with humor.

• Local Insights: Personal stories about Arizona's outdoor activities and urban issues provide relatable content for local listeners.

• Community Connection: Listener testimonials and humorous interactions underscore the show's strong rapport with its audience.

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Conclusion:

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona masterfully combines humor, local insights, and current events to engage its audience. Through lively discussions and entertaining anecdotes, the hosts offer a unique perspective on the Super Bowl, political satire, and community happenings, ensuring listeners are both informed and amused.

Transcript

[Brad Holmberg]

The podcast you are listening to of Holmberg's morning sickness is brought to you by my friends at Eric's Family Barbecue in Avondale. Meat Mesquite Repeat. Trust me on this one. You've had barbecue before, but you haven't had it this good. Eric's Family Barbecue in avondale eric's familybbq.com all right, HMS podcast, time again to.

[Byron]

Let you know where to go for.

[Brad Holmberg]

Some great comedy in the Valley this week.

[Craig Gass]

Check out the Desert Ridge Improv on Thursday to see the Shindig show with Jimmy Shin and special guest Tom Arnold as well as Kristen Key Friday through Sunday. Stand Stand Up Live has funnyman Tony Baker Friday and Saturday and the Tempe Improv features Dan Levy on Thursday and the brilliant Frank Caliendo on Sunday. For the complete lineups and for tickets go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com hey.

[Byron]

Byron, I was looking at mmpguns.com's website. You have everything and the prices are incredible.

[Diane Fisher]

Yes sir. Mmpguns.com has over 400,000 products for sale daily. Everything from firearms, ammunition, accessories, optics, clothing, decoys and more. The best part is if you see it on our website, it's in stock and ready to ship.

[Byron]

Wait, there's no back orders?

[Brad Holmberg]

Nope.

[Diane Fisher]

We work with all our distributors, so what you see on our site is what's actually available. We ship all over the country, so we're not just for Arizonans anymore. If the firearm you want is legal in your state, we can get it to a dealer for you to pick up.

[Byron]

Sounds simple. That's why I always go to MMP.

[Brad Holmberg]

Guns.Com there it is. That's what I like to hear. Well done alliance. There is the Apache's giving us our theme song for 2023 and it makes me happy every day. Thank you Alliance. They just got emails and I didn't know if it was yesterday or today, but it was yesterday. The Eagles and the Chiefs both have touched down. They are in town and I think they have the big intro show tonight. The NFL welcome to the super bowl show and they do this big, you know, introductions of the team and they make it a big red carpet event and stuff like that. A lot going on all winter long. Press day is that press day is usually tomorrow because it would be the player's day off and Craig Gas is coming in here in a little bit and he's going to go do that for us because he has access to everything. We still don't know how, but Craig Gats has access to all of it. He will down be on media row goofing around, talking to people, getting his nose in there. And I don't know how he does it. I've seen. I've seen Craig Gas do things that no human should get away with and has just really taken the whole act like you've. You're supposed to be there theory and putting it in action. He's. He's better than Obi Wan about telling guards and stuff. I'm going in there looking for. He's another George you're looking for. And then he wanders in. I got a suite at a Sun's game for the finals. This was not easy to get people with tickets. I had to go down and get them like I was giving tickets to these to the people. And I had to go down to get them at the bottom of the. The escalator because there was just. We're gonna make sure these are legit. This one's not bouncing off this one. They had so many security measures in place. We get up to the suite, I get a tap on my shoulder in the suite. There's Craig. He did not have a ticket.

[Diane Fisher]

Hey, buddy.

[Brad Holmberg]

I said, how'd you do that? And he goes, found this back door. Climb this ladder. And I'm on the second floor. I'm like, what kind of ladder? The ladder is one of those wall ladders. It is, it is. It is a straight up and down super ladder. And he found it and thought, I'll climb that and see what that leads to. And he ended up in our suite and he had a plate of cookies already. I don't know. He was amazing. So the guy has access to everything. And for the super bowl, it's legitimate, but he used to sneak in every sporting event and he's done it so long the best. A lot of people like.

[Diane Fisher]

I mean, he networks.

[Brad Holmberg]

It's not even networking with the right people. He networks with, he thinks with vendors, with people who are fans of his that might have, you know, beer guys that were the. The thing in Cleveland.

[Diane Fisher]

Come on in.

[Brad Holmberg]

He was at the game seven of the World Series with the Cubs and Indians. Had second deck seats, big upper decker seats. If you notice at the end of the game when Bill Murray's cheering for the Cubs, the guy sitting next to him is Craig Gaff.

[Diane Fisher]

That's right.

[Brad Holmberg]

Third row in off first baseline. And he's filming it and he's like, Craig Gass is part of Chicago Cubs history and lure because One of the shots is of Eddie Vedder, Bill Murray, Bonnie Hunt, and a bunch of other celebrities sitting there cheering longtime Cub fans. And there's crying dipstick Craig Guest standing there with his phone right in the middle of the mix because a guy recognized, hey, you're the guy. I know you. You're the comedians. Like, yeah, I love you, man. You need one of these. And he gives him this band that gets you down to the VIP thing. And Craig's like, well, if I can get vip, I can get down front, right? Just flashes the thing like, you're supposed to be there. Walks right to the front, sits down next to Bill Murray. Nobody says a thing, because who's gonna know he's got the band? He is remarkable. So we have pretty much hired him for no pay at all. He was gonna do this anyway, but he's gonna come in and just be part of this super bowl celebration. It's. It'll be on his Twitter first and then back with us the next day. His stories. It's going to be amazing.

[Byron]

Is he our radio rogue guy?

[Brad Holmberg]

He's our. Well, he's. Well, look, we're just borrowing it. We're his. We're kind of borrowing him.

[Byron]

Okay.

[Brad Holmberg]

So it's not. He works for us. We're basically saying, all right, Craig, go nuts and come back and tell us your stories. But he'll be here this morning with whatever he's going to do, and he's already told me, I got passes for the Tuesday night thing. You're coming with me. I'm like, I don't even know what it is. Me neither. But we're going in, and there's going to be this. This that. It's, like, amazing stuff. I'm like, I'll go with you. So we'll see what. What happens with what? With Craig. But it's. He's going to be here, and the teams are here, and everybody's starting to get all involved and crazy about that. I remember going to the airport when the Steelers played the super bowl here and back in 95. 96. Super Bowl, 95 season and that entire tarmac. I don't know if you're still allowed to do what we did, which was just wander around the airport. Tarmac. I would assume not.

[Byron]

I wouldn't think so anymore.

[Brad Holmberg]

But, I mean, they just. They had a little section for us, and we watched the Steelers get off the plane. U S Airways plane pulls up, and there they were just. It was crazy. Hundreds and hundreds of people just standing in the Runway.

[Diane Fisher]

Yeah. I Don't think they do the greetings anymore.

[Brad Holmberg]

I don't know how they do it, if they do it. They corralled us pretty good. But we were wandering about. It was a. There's a lot of moving around in places. But nobody thought, I ain't gonna blow up a plane. It'd be silly. And no. And we weren't. We weren't. And you could kind of tell we were all hyper focused on watching the boys get off the plane and cheering wildly. It was pretty fun. So I understand that. That excitement, that's a pretty fun thing to feel. And the Chiefs landed, and then the Eagles landed and soon their fans will be here too. And bleh. Yeah, some guy said, he emailed me and he. The best thing about what I was talking about with other people talking about city, said I had a city planner go, phoenix doesn't have a good skyline like New York or Philly or Chicago. And he's like, yeah, well, I guess shouldn't stay. Which is the proper answer. That's the proper thing to say. What's going on with your skyline? You got no tall building. Yeah, see, we did it right where we wisely decided to make the sprawling building five stories and not an eyesore of stupidity because the land used to be cheaper. And also we're not landlocked. We can go for forever and ever and ever, so we don't need to go 80 stories into the sky. We have a very subdued skyline. It is kind of goofy, but if you're looking at it from, you know, PS DUA Peak, it's a small skyline. It's a beautiful, like, little building. So, you know, nothing special. We don't have a lot of great architecture, but some nice stuff that's. I guess you don't like our skyline. Should probably go back to Philly and smell the garbage that's on your everywhere. Dumpiest city I've ever been to in my life. Oh, I'm from Philly. I'm not listening to that. I guess you should leave, turn the radio station off and get back in your plane or whatever it is, your carriage and head home. Kansas City, you're fine. We're not at all. Nobody screams, oh, I'm from Kansas City.

[Craig Gass]

I'm not listening to that.

[Brad Holmberg]

Okay, cities that screen that their. Their citizens shout out where they're from every time something happens. It's like, oh, this complex you have about how tough you are hauling oats. Tom Hanks with aids. That's all I'm gonna say to you every time I Hear well. I'm from Philly. Hanks with aids. What do you mean? That's what we think of Broken bell Hanks with aids. That's it. Hauling oats. We got every with the flyers. We got hockey. We got hockey. Yeah, sorta. It's borderline, but we've got it. Don't start screaming like you're the only town with hockey either. You're just a bunch of dicks. I mean, you could replace the word Philly with the word asshole. Hey, the guy come over, the Uber driver says something. Hey, I'm an asshole. I'm not dealing with this. That's basically what you're saying. Every. What normal people hear when you say I'm from Philly is I'm a huge asshole. So I did this next. Thanks, Philly. If you guess I don't like Philly. I still think they're gonna win the Super Bowl. Thank you, Philly. It's just gonna be an intolerable Sunday night to Monday morning. And I feel bad for the people on probably Allegiant or Spirit Airlines that have to do three stops with Philly fans all the way back to probably. They land in Wilkes Barre or something. They don't even go through to Philly.

[Diane Fisher]

It's gonna be so loaded up with cocopellies and dream catchers.

[Brad Holmberg]

I'm from Philly. I shouldn't have bought this turquoise guy. This little weird dude trying to blow himself. I thought it was hilarious. It's a coca pelle. That's a flute. Oh, I'm from Philly. A guy bent over like that's blow himself. Thanks, Philly guy. We shot down the balloon. I'm very excited about the balloon being shot down because it adds to the story. Biden said shoot it down on Wednesday. They're like, let's hold out. It gets over into the Atlantic. Everybody goes nuts that we had an F19 or something. Just pop the balloon. It did exactly what they said it wouldn't do. They couldn't shoot it down over the the States because they were worried it would just start floating all over and collateral damage. It was exactly what happens when you pop a balloon. It deflates and it just sinks to the earth. It wasn't, you know, just spinning all over like a party balloon. It was what you'd do if a hot air balloon blew up. China said last week, oh, oh, yeah. One of our balloons. Oh, we'll look into it. We're not sure, but don't shoot it down. They didn't know what it was. And then Came back with a story that it was a weather balloon that had gone off course. Wouldn't there. Wouldn't you know that?

[Diane Fisher]

And we had another one.

[Brad Holmberg]

Wouldn't that be your first answer? Yeah. You found it. We had a weather balloon that went bananas, and we've been looking for it. It isn't reporting back, so we didn't know where it went. So it's. It's just floating around doing nothing. But their second day answer was, it's a weather balloon that we lost and didn't tell anyone about losing. Like, if I was China or the United States and we had a big weather balloon that kind of went off course, wouldn't you call Russia?

[Diane Fisher]

Heads up.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, heads up, guys. We lost a balloon. Shoot it down. It's a weather balloon. We don't care. So we shoot it down. And China's first thing is, oh, you've ruined relationships with us. Thanks a lot. What were they gonna do? Come get it or just wait for it to float home?

[Diane Fisher]

Just let it float around.

[Byron]

Let's go. Float for how long?

[Brad Holmberg]

Well, they're not allowed to come get it, so it's. We're gonna shoot your balloon down, if you don't mind. It's just a weather balloon, right? Oh, yeah, no big deal. Just. Or shoot it down at bad relations. Bad relations. How is that bad relations? Is all you're doing is collecting weather data, and you didn't even know it was missing. Still, we write our stuff back, we're shooting it down.

[Byron]

It's probably a bunch of knockoff NFL jerseys in that thing. That's probably what it was.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Diane Fisher]

Dropping a patch.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yep. Wouldn't that be great if we popped it and just tons and tons of Cincinnati Bengals world champions shirts. Shout out, Getting rid of waste. Getting rid of all that dumb stuff. That's how they get it over to Africa.

[Diane Fisher]

Yeah.

[Brad Holmberg]

Airdrop it. But yeah, if you didn't know you had a balloon, like, anymore, like, we lost our balloon. Don't tell anyone. And then somebody goes, is this your balloon? You're like, yeah, that's ours, but give it back. Like, no, it's not doing anything bad. We're gonna shoot it down. Then if there's. There's no consequence to your weather data collection, they're pissed off. They're pissed off that we shot their stupid balloon down.

[Diane Fisher]

Well, the other thing is, evidently we've been watching a lot of balloons over the years.

[Brad Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Now all of a sudden, oh, if.

[Diane Fisher]

You haven't seen these yet, we had three over there.

[Brad Holmberg]

Galveston, Atlanta, Texas, These Chinese balloons are all over. So that. That's another thing that makes me feel like the whole thing is a lie, is that suddenly the government's like, we're shooting it down. You're the ones who just a day ago told me that there's like 15 of them. We've. You've never once shot one down. Suddenly we see it, we looked at it, and you're like, yeah, we gotta shoot these down now. Well, what about the other ones that you've been bragging about, knowing that have been floating around above us?

[Diane Fisher]

Do you hear the. In South Carolina had to make announcements and put out on the do not shoot at the balloon. You know, people are pumping rounds at him.

[Brad Holmberg]

It was still a little high. If you gotta get a plane, but still send fired. Yeah, of course there were. I think I can get to it.

[Byron]

Hold my beer.

[Brad Holmberg]

Hold this for a second. I'm taking down one of them chinky balloons right now. Nope, I missed by a mile. I missed by a lot. That thing's far away. Look closer to me.

[Diane Fisher]

For some reason, he's got a spotter.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, to the left.

[Diane Fisher]

The wind is three.

[Brad Holmberg]

Three clicks for the wind. Three clicks left. I think I got this thing. Bob, you take it down, man, you take down China for all us in the Palmetto State. Okay?

[Byron]

Hold my natty drinking. No, Karen, I know it's from over there somewhere.

[Brad Holmberg]

You take a sip of that beer, I'll know. You keep that in your left hand. Your non drinking hand. You spot me, try to hook it.

[Diane Fisher]

Then they can. When you put those panels on our house, we get solar power.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, we can keep it. Get some of that discount Chinese solar power. Stupid. But us shooting it down, we got all proud. We're so dumb. We absorb news so badly. We're so dumb. The day before we shot it down, we were told there's been like 18 of these balloons by the people who said, we gotta shoot this down. All of a sudden, 18, 18 different balloons. They've known about like balloons all over the place. Chinese balloons shoot over here all the time. We know about it, we do it to them. But then they acted all tough. I told them to shoot that down. I felt real sorry for Joe Biden last night because his wife was a presenter at the Grammys and she didn't even go on stage till 9pm our time. He didn't see they could wake him all they wanted. His eyes were still closed. Doing a great job, duh. Hey, stop TV.

[Byron]

She could have been at 4 and he would have been asleep. I mean, you know, I'll take a.

[Brad Holmberg]

Nap and wake up for. I'll wake up for jail. Go to sleep. But, yeah, he was all tough about the balloon. The balloon. 20 or 30 of these things last month. Shoot it down.

[Diane Fisher]

Back off the president, man. He's getting mean.

[Brad Holmberg]

Gotta shoot that balloon down. Yeah. Can't pop a balloon. Never try to pop a balloon at one of the carnivals. It's not that easy. Sometimes it bounces right off of them. Gotta get an F19 up there to do that. But they. They killed it. And it wasn't very exciting to see it. I thought it would be more like. I was kind of hoping it was loaded with some sort of Hindenburg gas. And thing would have just gone up in smoke in a self. Like, if the Chinese were smart, they would make it so it blow like Mission impossible. Just explodes. If it ever itself destructs. Nah. Now we got divers all over the Atlantic.

[Diane Fisher]

I was just wondering, as it's spiraling down, you know. You know, they probably are estimating where it might hit.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah. Just.

[Diane Fisher]

I'd love to see the scene of all the boats scrambling.

[Brad Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Like a baseball going into the bay in San Francisco. People diving and swimming.

[Diane Fisher]

Got it.

[Brad Holmberg]

And then they're saying, well, we can't find it. We got divers out there. Like, you didn't watch it land. Like it's golf. You watch your ball all the way. Right. It's out there somewhere. We'll get divers in the area. You're never gonna find anything from that. It's crazy. So good luck with the divers and the balloons. And if you see a balloon overhead this week, probably not.

[Diane Fisher]

Chinese see a couple. You're gonna see one that's oblonged. That's a blimp.

[Brad Holmberg]

That's a blimp. Don't shoot at it.

[Byron]

Yep, hillbillies, if it says Goodyear, you're good.

[Brad Holmberg]

Good year. If Snoopy's on it at all. And of course, the Chinese are wise, they might paint a Snoopy on it. Don't worry, Justin. Snoopy. Snoopy Maroon.

[Byron]

Oh, wow.

[Brad Holmberg]

It's a ripe insurance thing. Rife insert Snoopy Baron. Met rife. They'll get balloons and blimps and all sorts of crazy stuff.

[Diane Fisher]

There'll be a typo on it, though. That's when you know it's shiny.

[Brad Holmberg]

Met rife. That's not right. Ah, we all confused. College hoops are here.

[Diane Fisher]

And there's no better place to catch.

[Brad Holmberg]

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[Diane Fisher]

Beatbox or Buzz balls for a low price.

[Brad Holmberg]

This offer is for game days only, so grab your crew, enjoy the action and feast on the flavors you love. Only at Hooters. The original wing joint since 1983. Hi, I'm Diane Fisher from Fisher Tools. From our humble beginnings in 1964 at the Phoenix park and swap to our 4 acre campus located just south of Tempe Marketplace off the 202 and McClintock, Fisher Tools has been building the valley for over 60 years. Come check us out and browse our huge selection of tools and anything you need to do the job right. We carry Milwaukee, DeWalt, Makita, Proto, and so much more. We're also [e-mail] KUPD listeners will receive 10% off their order when you mention this ad. Fisher Tools. If we don't have it, we can't sell it. Oh, Carrie Lake. Carrie Lake. Is. Is that real?

[Byron]

Yeah, it's on her.

[Brad Holmberg]

It's on her Twitter page. On Carrie Lake's Twitter, she's sitting in a field with a gun. Point at the sky. It says, I'm told there's a balloon that needs to be got a 12 gauge. She's gonna buckshot a balloon from five miles into the sky. We need to turn her loose this week.

[Byron]

Oh, man.

[Brad Holmberg]

We need to. We need to let people know that. And we need to cheer for every time that people think we're insane. Is that real? She's. She is holding a shotgun looking at the sky. She's balloon hunting out there, shooting birds. Wow. The guy says that shotgun will reach about 150ft above your head. The balloon's about 59,850 above its reach. Stick to losing elections. You're good at that. The first comment, he's tough guy in the balloon with a shotgun. Oh, hilarious. Airy Lake, the macho man standing out there doing her thing. I like it. That's pretty fun stuff. Yeah. So most locals are basically saying they're going to stay put this week. Can't say that I blame them. I did. I did go out on the bike yesterday and hit the trails and it was packed. And I think a lot of people from out of town were on Trail 100 yesterday and Trail 1A because there were a lot of flip flops thinking that this is just a leisurely stroll. I saw Two downed ankles. And then my favorite thing was two guys on bikes that were rented were on top of a hill. And it wasn't a big hill. You get to, you know the climb that pretty much gases you right off the bat and then you're fine. It's the top of this little hill. And at the top of the hill these guys were looking around over away. There was another dude in a red shirt waving his arms, screaming, I'm lost, I'm lost. But you can see the people you're meeting and there's like a trail. I'm from Philly.

[Byron]

Good, stay there.

[Brad Holmberg]

I'm from Philly. We ain't got this. He's standing at one end of the trail waving his arms at his friends who were just screaming, follow the trail. I'm lost. You can see us. You're not that lost. He was scared to death. And you just heard about rattlesnakes. Wow, beautiful day. If there's any day to be lost. And by the way, from where I was at that point, you can see houses. You'll figure this out. But the pure panic from the out of towner standing in the desert thinking, I got about three hours to live, I'm not gonna have enough water, there's no food out here. Suddenly they think they gotta eat bugs and dig up a coyote. And it was the weirdest thing. Like they. And I'm like, I said, I told him too. I'm like, you guys are like one turn away, he's right there. It just looks far. Cause we're up. You drop down this hill, it cuts you back over. Yeah, he'll figure that out. Will he? Because I think he's pretty, pretty resigned to the idea of not moving at this point. He's waiting to be rescued. He wants a helicopter. And there were a people who were Philly strong and in that, I mean the cheesesteaks that were working some bikes and they shouldn't have been out there. There was a lot of heavy panting and first timers that they first day in the the city, they decided to check out all we've got and.

[Diane Fisher]

Enjoy the sun poisoning.

[Brad Holmberg]

Well, the sun was least of my concern for these two. Their hearts were being tested. That's no joke. That ride is like for a first time person, you're like, I'll go mountain biking. We have different mountain bike trails than most places that are kind of smooth and high hills. We bumps and those rocks are like razor blades and cactus and all that stuff. You got to be smart. But these, there were a couple of you know, remember those two fat guys from the Guinness book on the motorcycles? Yeah. A father son was doing that.

[Diane Fisher]

Wow.

[Brad Holmberg]

And I passed them and they're like, that's amazing. They. They could barely move. And the breathing. You could hear them like, hey, Darth Vader.

[Craig Gass]

You guys want do it, Junior, pull it over.

[Brad Holmberg]

Well, they got halfway through and realized, oh, no. Damn it. That's not as beautiful as I thought. This is miserable. I'm blacking out. I'm from Philly. But we're gonna see a lot of that. You're gonna Mike. I wonder what. What the fanduel over under is on a mountain rescue this week.

[Diane Fisher]

Got a negative something you don't you.

[Brad Holmberg]

Think it's gonna be an easy. Oh, yeah. I think by Thursday we'll have a couple. Camelback is going to be.

[Diane Fisher]

You're not going to win any money on that.

[Brad Holmberg]

No.

[Diane Fisher]

Unless you go. You have to go the over.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah. For every hundred you put down, you.

[Diane Fisher]

Get a dollar eight rescues by Thursday. Big money.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah. It's as good as betting that Deandre Ayton's gonna get one rebound. You're. You're not making much off of that. But yeah. Mountain rescue. I think it would probably be camelback. That'll be the most popular one. But I saw a lot of flip flops yesterday.

[Diane Fisher]

They're qualified. If you're talking. If you're saying the Philly cheesesteak factors kicking in. Squad peak could work just as easy. They'll just have to wheel them down. It's not so much, you know, bring the helicopters. It's just getting that giant mono wheel.

[Brad Holmberg]

Big wheel. I've seen it in action. I've seen it with a small person and she barely fit in it. If a big basket. If a Philly fat got in one of our baskets, they're gonna need a double wheel because those Philly fats are large humans. They drag that big Philly fat up that hill because it doesn't look like much. They're like, that's a mountain. But you climb camelback and you.

[Diane Fisher]

It'll get the heart rate going.

[Brad Holmberg]

You kick your ass. Especially if you're Philly fat, wit, whiz or widow know.

[Byron]

Geez, here we go.

[Brad Holmberg]

I think Philly fetch. Look. I'm from Philly.

[Diane Fisher]

Give me so much whiz on that hill.

[Brad Holmberg]

And I'm from Philly. They'll probably put a rocky statue on top of it if they get there.

[Byron]

I'm okay with that, though.

[Brad Holmberg]

That would be kind of neat. If the top. You can just barely See a little rocky statue on top of the back of camel? Yeah. They don't look like a camel. It's laying down. I'm from Philly, where I get came. Oh, God. Can you just quote your most notable person and say, I can't go for that Hauling oats. Philly soul. Yep.

[Byron]

I'm a man eater.

[Brad Holmberg]

Down there. Darryl andor John. But yeah. So we've got all this to look forward to all week. The NFL experience will be fun. And then you got the Phoenix Open, which is going to be our crown jewel of. They said 380,000 expected Friday or Saturday. That's not total. That's 80.

[Diane Fisher]

You're not getting out of Scottsdale for your duck overnight.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah. And good luck, because the fees for a hotel room are a billion dollars. It's going to be pretty amazing. So we'll see. The city is in a weird hunk. It's a. It's different than any other super bowl that we've had here. For some reason, this one feels huge and I don't know why. This one has, like, giant written all over it compared to the ones we've had in the past that didn't really clog up our world like, this one seems to be like the perfect storm.

[Diane Fisher]

And still in a phase where, hey, it's. It's good to get out. We can go to things. Yeah, they're still in that mode.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah. I'm worried. Mountain rescues. I'm guessing the over under would be what, three. Three good mountain rescues by Saturday because they got to fill time and it's been there. They've been locked up since October. Philly and Kansas City. So they're going to be outside 75 degrees trying to climb Camelback.

[Diane Fisher]

See the big wheel, basket filled, patient covered in the flex seal blanket water.

[Brad Holmberg]

You're gonna hear that a lot on the hills. Oh, my ankle. Water. I need water. Those Philly people are gonna be screaming for water. Oh, no. You got a water ice? Give me a water ice. We don't have that. Just take a sip of our goddamn water. And I'm from Philly. We need water ice. No. Get some whiz. No, we're not gonna give you whiz. You fell down. Whiz. Put whiz on it.

[Diane Fisher]

I'm check fries if it's blown out. The whiz is gone.

[Brad Holmberg]

Oh, the wiz. The full industrial cans to Costco. Whiz is gone. Gonna have whiz. Go on ahead. Wiz. Put wiz in. I'm from Philly. I put Wiz on my salad.

[Diane Fisher]

What, no hoagie buns?

[Brad Holmberg]

Yuck. Good. God damn it. San Francisco's a decent group. They're a bunch of liberal weirdos. But the good ones would have shown up. And they want to go home. They don't want to be here. We could have set Carrie Lake loose on those San Francisco libs and they would have never wanted to come back. They would have lost their minds. Carrie Lake shooting at balloons in the sky. We should put hot air balloons up with like a. Like Chinese writing on them. Just have Carrie Lake taking them down on tv. Just like, let her. Let her go crazy.

[Diane Fisher]

She's at the border right now. Same outfit.

[Brad Holmberg]

She down there just shooting at the sky. Well, let the Mexicans in. I love them. Compared to people from Philly, what in the world? Brad's doing a little dance. Making a little love.

[Byron]

Nah, it was wrong. Wrong track here.

[Brad Holmberg]

Oh, I see what he's doing. Are you bringing her in? Yeah, he's here. Ladies and gentlemen. Shooting at balloons in the sky. Carry the Macho man leg.

[Craig Gass]

Oh, yeah. Welcome to our beautiful bird Philadelphia. But don't get too crazy trying to get higher than me. Cause I'll pluck you out of the sky like a dove in October. Oh, yeah.

[Diane Fisher]

Did you hit the balloon?

[Craig Gass]

I was shooting at the balloon. And you might notice, Brady, that there's no more balloons to worry about. I plugged it. I was shooting high and hard and got her out, baby.

[Brad Holmberg]

Oh, yeah.

[Craig Gass]

Carrie. The Macho Man Lake don't tolerate no chinky balloons over her country.

[Diane Fisher]

What else you got planned today?

[Craig Gass]

Think, Brit. You knew Brit would like that one.

[Diane Fisher]

You just gotta vote.

[Craig Gass]

Oh, yeah. Going to Senate with my shotgun and my one eye closed. Eyeballing those Chinese invaders. Coming through the sky balloon style. I'm heading to Albuquerque for a little while. Just for a big turkey shoot practice round. You better not even squintin from gonna carry macho man leg. Cause I'll shoot you dead anyway. I'm gonna shoot at you. And I'm gonna shoot at you and Dim. Some guy's gonna try to shoot at me. But he's not gonna win because there ain't no beating. Carried a bunch of wetley. Now it's off to Bass Pro Shop. Cause I'm gonna get myself a bow and arrow. And try to take him down the old fashioned way.

[Diane Fisher]

Working on all the hunting.

[Craig Gass]

Oh, I got them too. In my golden lasso. Like the wonder woman that I am. We'll pull her down and we'll find out what they know. Carry the macho men leak out.

[Brad Holmberg]

Jesus Christ. That lady is crazy.

[Diane Fisher]

She's got 9am at sport clips. I know, she's.

[Brad Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Is that where she gets.

[Diane Fisher]

Yeah.

[Brad Holmberg]

Are you making fun of her hair? A little bit. It's short, sporty. Sporty like Sporty Spice.

[Diane Fisher]

Yeah.

[Brad Holmberg]

Calling her a lesbian as well.

[Diane Fisher]

No.

[Craig Gass]

Sexuality in the question, Bre. Without a fight. Now, if you would have a dick waving contest, sir, I'm all about it. Because I'm pretty sure that my is longer than whatever God blessed you with.

[Diane Fisher]

Put the kettlebells down.

[Craig Gass]

Never.

[Byron]

All right, who'd win the contest, her or Beth? Oh, just whipping it out there.

[Brad Holmberg]

I mean, Beth's got a big one.

[Diane Fisher]

More energy out of Lake right now.

[Brad Holmberg]

I think Carrie just wins based on the energy. Yeah, the BDE comes off carry. Beth is just. Just packing. Uncle Milty packs a big punch down south.

[Byron]

Just enough to win.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, she pulls out just enough to win. But I think Carrie might give her a run for money. Carrie has got a big penis. I can't believe that post is real. That is hilarious. Anyway, but that would have scared. Imagine San Francisco if they'd have done anything. Carrie Lake shooting at balloons out in her backyard. I mean, those liberal loons from San Francisco would have run away from this place. Kansas City, just. Again, you're an innocuous gray face that'll come and go. We won't even notice you.

[Byron]

Great barbecue, though.

[Brad Holmberg]

Amazing. Their food's good and they might complain. Oh, yeah, they'll complain a little bit about the barbecue, but they know they have the best. Eric's family barbecue is gonna give him a run. Our friend over there at. What's that wing place?

[Byron]

Booty.

[Brad Holmberg]

Booty Booties. Yeah, you know, give you a challenge. But I don't know what to expect. I just know that I'm. I'm gonna lock up pretty good. I got a couple of things I kind of have to go to, but I'm from. For the most part. I'm gonna board it up for the week.

[Byron]

Board Craig Mission Impossible.

[Brad Holmberg]

I want to follow Craig around in a Mission Impossible because I'm all about. You know, that Tuesday thing.

[Diane Fisher]

Fudging through could be pretty fun.

[Brad Holmberg]

It's only. I don't want to. I don't want to go anywhere with Craig. Gas where we've got tickets.

[Byron]

So you're not going to Gronk's party. And maybe like if I.

[Brad Holmberg]

If I'm with Craig, I'll follow him because I am all about that.

[Diane Fisher]

I went to Magic's party the last Time. I mean, things have changed. That was it.

[Brad Holmberg]

That was. That was a long time ago, but.

[Diane Fisher]

It was the same thing. Guy had tickets and, like, you want to go? Okay, yeah.

[Brad Holmberg]

You could get into stuff then. That was nice. Like, now it's crazy. Security to get in, all of it. Craig can get through. So I. I'm a big believer in act like you're supposed to be there and walk right in. There hasn't. But I use it at, like, the botanical gardens or the zoo. Like, I don't go to big events and sneak in. Although I have. I snuck into Sea World once, which was pretty hard to do, and I knocked that out of the ark. Just noticed that there was a door open, and we're standing in line. I'm like, that goes right to SeaWorld. Let's see. And we popped right in and acted like we were supposed to be there. And that was it. I do it at Suns games. Every game. I got that. I faked my way down into that VIP section every game. I say it on the radio, and nobody can stop me. Got the wristband. You can't. Got a system. You break my system, you break me.

[Diane Fisher]

Now we're talking.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, I love breaking and entering. Love it. And Craig's the best at it. So if I go out with Craig and it's just tickets and, like, what's the point of this being with you? Find me that ladder. Let's get up on top of this thing and do some damage. Get into the good VIP section. We'll see. But, yeah, I got a couple of events that I've. I've agreed to go to that I'm like, once I get there, I'll be fine. But the process is going to be brutal.

[Diane Fisher]

That's the thing.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, I don't want to drive to it. I don't want to be part of it. Just.

[Diane Fisher]

That's me on the. The Opens.

[Brad Holmberg]

Probably the most, like, oh, are you going?

[Diane Fisher]

Not right now.

[Byron]

You guys haven't been roped into that, like, normal.

[Brad Holmberg]

I'm roped in. And again, once I get there, everything will be fine. I'm looking forward to the people that are going to be there. Like, you know, I like.

[Byron]

It's getting there.

[Brad Holmberg]

It's just when you're there for getting there part. And, yeah, we'll see. But if Carrie's there, it'll be great. Oh, every golf ball that flies by, she's gonna shoot it.

[Craig Gass]

Not today. Gabille Park.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, Carrie is gonna lose it, but, yeah, we could have set her loose on those San Franciscans. And they'd have gone back with stories about how horrible it is here because Carrie's got legs. We didn't think about that when we were voting. Katie Hobbs is all welcoming and like, come on in. Move here. No way. Carrie Lake.

[Diane Fisher]

Tourism money.

[Brad Holmberg]

Well, tourism's one thing, but making them stay, like, we gotta be. We gotta pick up some attitude. And the fact that the weather is going to be as perfect as it gets is just. Oh, this is a tough place.

[Diane Fisher]

Is amazing.

[Brad Holmberg]

Exactly. Oh, I'm. I'm a little less worried about the people that are going to be here than the ones who are going to watch it on tv because the TV will show Sedona like it's five minutes. Oh, yeah. Sunset and the Grand Canyon like two minutes away. It's really far. But they make it seem like it's all within, like a bike ride away.

[Byron]

Yeah, they need to show like Maryvale aj, You know, the west side.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah. Before you get too excited, friends, let's take a look at some of the murders. Wrong way drivers. All sorts of crazy. The meth. The meth houses. Just Guadalupe should be featured somehow.

[Diane Fisher]

But VRBO signs up.

[Brad Holmberg]

They're moving the homeless out. They're sweeping them out of the. Into the. Into what they call the zone, which is downtown. And they're. They're sweeping them already. I can't say who because he'd get in trouble for telling me this stuff. But a friend who happens to be in city, a city job, he told me, he said, yeah, it's imperative we pick.

[Diane Fisher]

Sweep is happening.

[Brad Holmberg]

Pick them up and dropping them off from high population areas. Like.

[Byron]

So are they putting them in the zone?

[Brad Holmberg]

Like zone.

[Byron]

They're right down there by the Capitol.

[Brad Holmberg]

On the Capitol. And then there's another one up in Scottsdale. They're dropping them off up there and they're zoning it out and they're. I didn't know this and this is our money going to. They're. They're like paying extra for more food and stuff to keep them there. There you go. There you go. Look, there's like cornhole giving them games and. Yeah, that's it. Just over there. Big meth pile.

[Diane Fisher]

Maybe that's the place to go watch the Super Bowl.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, well, they're worried they had to sweep Margaret T. Hans park because that's.

[Diane Fisher]

Got loads a huge event.

[Brad Holmberg]

Humongous. And they are scooting them out and they can't scoot them downtown because there's stuff going on there. Let's move you guys. And just wedged Them on over to the zone. But if you go down there right now, the like the like. Because there's a dude who stands on the 7th street and 10 over like the off ramp. Yeah, he is rough looking and he's there every time. And this dude is rough looking. I've been by when fire trucks are propping him up. He's not gonna make it. And then the next time I pull up, he's there. He is again, he's not there. And that little walkway is usually a bunch of like for a better word, tents. And like they have little building seventh street clear.

[Diane Fisher]

That overpass for some reason gets the extremes.

[Brad Holmberg]

Well, it's gone.

[Diane Fisher]

He had that lady without the calf for years.

[Brad Holmberg]

Like that bone. It was just a bone. She made me take the HOV lane off third because I couldn't look at her anymore. I remember I used to get off on that 7th Street. Like she'd stand there and she had a human bone for a leg. Yeah, there was a few. But that I was there just the other day, swept clean. Like. Wow, that's never been that nice. So it's pretty nice downtown right now. We need to. We need to unleash the zone on Sunday night all around where the Philly people party. That's it. Robin blind. What do you got on the big board of musical treats there?

[Byron]

All right, wake up song time. And of course you guys know it's brought to you by our buddies at Action Ride Shop. It's gonna be a beautiful weekend. You want to hit the trails this weekend. Action Ride Shop's a place to do it. They got rentals, they got sales. You need to buy a new bike, you want to rent one just to check it out. All the accessories you're going to need. And if you got that old bike in the garage, needs a some repairs to get out there.

[Brad Holmberg]

Just.

[Byron]

They got the best wrenches in town. So go, go check them out actionrideshop.com or just stop in and visit Josh and the boys over there at Gilbert Road and Southern.

[Brad Holmberg]

My friend just bought a. An electric cruiser.

[Byron]

So not a mountain bike, but just to cruise around town.

[Brad Holmberg]

And I didn't know that because the electric mountain bikes don't have this. Go to Josh right now over at Action Ride Shop and rent one of these. It has a button. You don't have to pedal. And he gets 26 miles an hour. You're flying on this. You don't. And it's. And it's true. Like that's what I think people think when I say of the electric mountain bike. Oh, you just hit the button. No, you gotta pedal this. This one just. It's got a motor.

[Diane Fisher]

That's what that. That tandem I did a couple years ago back in San Diego. It is derby on the back.

[Brad Holmberg]

So fast.

[Diane Fisher]

Oh yeah.

[Brad Holmberg]

I was like nervous riding that thing around, but I'm like, oh, this changes everything. I prefer a pedaling, but there's basically.

[Diane Fisher]

A mobile kinetic or whatever.

[Brad Holmberg]

Well, kinetic is you have to work the engine to get to move it. Like the mountain bikes.

[Byron]

Yeah.

[Brad Holmberg]

Works off its own energy. This is just a. You pump straight up.

[Diane Fisher]

Throttle.

[Brad Holmberg]

Throttle. Yeah. It's just that you just gun in it. It's. And you don't have to pedal because I hit it right off the bat and I'm going. It doesn't store energy. It's got. It's charged. I couldn't believe how fast those things are. And if you're lazy and you want to tell people you want on a 10 mile bike ride, that's the route to go. You're not going to drop a single pound. In fact, you're not going to do anything. But you can lie and tell people how active you are. Well, we rode the canals 41 miles. Wow, you look horrible.

[Byron]

On the list, AC DC's whole lot of Rosie for Lizzo, Mastodon, Metallica, Hollywood Undead, Falling in Reverse, Clutch up there Twice, Megadeth, Seven Dust, Jerry Cantrell, the.

[Brad Holmberg]

Cult, Drowning Pool, Dick Guy's a great song. That's the old one, isn't it?

[Byron]

Yeah. That's not the first Jerry album.

[Brad Holmberg]

I don't know. Watch the World Burns pretty great. Falling in Reverses. Larry is all over that man. Is that the one he's loving right now? I think that's it. He just won't stop playing their videos. Their videos are incredible. I don't really care, Brett. I'm looking at this and I don't have one that's jumping. So you choose.

[Byron]

I don't know. That Cantrell one has never popped up before.

[Brad Holmberg]

Let's do Dickeye by Jerry Cantrell. The great song. Yeah. His first album Solo was really good. Yeah, I haven't listened to much since, but that, that first one was pretty awesome. So. Thick Eye by Jerry Cantrell. We haven't done that for a while. This guy says, I just wanted to say thank you. I'm a native born here to the Valley. So I've seen radio stations come and go my entire life, all the way back to Chris and Crux. I'm a retired police officer. With 30 years, a Valley agency, and plenty of experience dealing with the entire spectrum of humanity, your morning show is nothing short of awesome. God, this guy's right. Never heard somebody more right. It's obvious they have a great understanding of general human populace, which makes you outstanding. Not so much because of what you say, because any radio station could provide newsworthy banter. What I respect is how you deliver it. You're a master of it. Combining humors with. Or your humor with logic. This guy's onto something. I really don't even care for most music that you play, but I don't and will not switch. Because listening to you is a great start every day. So many people have logical. Don't have logical thought anymore. You're an everyday reminder to me that someone does. Respectfully, Ben Roberson, Ben Robertson, you are an early candidate for listener of the year.

[Diane Fisher]

Yes, he's in the running.

[Brad Holmberg]

Thank you, Ben. I'd love to try to argue your points, but they're so perfect. Salient. Well said. I'm proud of you, Ben, for recognizing my brilliance. You know, you should probably call me Gary or Kid Harpoon. I can't tell what.

[Byron]

That's Steve Holberg.

[Brad Holmberg]

That's all my mailman. So Saturday mailman knocks on the door, he knows better. And I go to get the mail and he's already across the street and in there is a address change and it says, name Stephen Holmberg, question mark. And I looked at him and I said, did you do this? And he's like, I heard it this morning. He listened on the podcast on the weekend. And I said, this is very funny, I like this a lot. And he goes, yeah, I figured, you know, might as well just rename you. That's perfect. Still not a peep out of the people that tried to cut my knees out from me.

[Diane Fisher]

Publications been shut down.

[Brad Holmberg]

Yeah, well, hard hitting journalism when they're trying to take a guy down and not know his name immediately makes all your facts questionable. You are a terrible journalist. I won't even give your paper or you credit, but you tried to do a hit piece on me and you didn't get my name right. And I. And I love every second of it. I love every second of woke victimization. Trying as hard as they can to cut me off and losing on their own merit. Just coming at me with the wrong name. And it's like, okay, you didn't do any research. Your story means nothing. Nothing. Hilarious. And you'll hear the Queen Creekers calm it down or else. And Carrie Lake over there again, we'll end this. It's out of control now. You've been listening to Holmberg's Morning Sickness Podcast, brought to you by our friends at Eric's family barbecue in Avondale. Meet mesquite Repeat Eric's familybbq.com.