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Dick Toledo
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Brady Bogan
Still streaming Homberg's morning sickness online at 98kupd.com a lot of people heading to that waste management open now. And evidently the new rules are can't drink till 9. You should be able to drink once you got to can't drink till nine. And the wristbands we were talking about only eight drinks now. So they've limited you. They pulled you back from 10 to 8. My God. What are we supposed to do with that? The fun thing is is that the people waiting for the cause the 16th, nobody gets there at least on Saturday till later in the day. Like right now, I think they start on 10 and 1 and they double up. So you're seeing people pretty soon.
Brett
Base crowd.
Brady Bogan
Yeah, you see them pretty fast. But on Saturday, you got to wait a couple hours after they tee off to see anybody on 16 and they're chucking burritos at these people that can't get into the tents for the food and drink. They're just sitting on that. That GA spot. Yeah, those people are troopers. That's a. That's a group, man. Be careful on your way out there. Parking my. I got to go today and I don't know how I'm going to get there. I got stuff to do after I've. I was going to Waymo and then wander. I do not want to park. I don't want to drive myself because I'll be drinking my 16 drinks because I've got eight and I know Brady. Brady's not going to use his wristband, so I'll just borrow that one. Now I gotta stagger out of there and figure out my way mo home. Brett, you could just wait for me at the bell and wherever that there's a dispensary there. I learned that yesterday. Oh, did you just hang out there? I'll get you tickets to Nickelback and nice. Just we'll swap out. But be careful. It's a mess already. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady report. Brady reported.
Brett
Good Friday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world. We made it.
Brady Bogan
Hi.
Brett
Happy National Bubblegum Day. Happy. This is gonna be a busy one today. Hug an addict or alcoholic day.
Brady Bogan
Oh, boy.
Brett
And national Working naked Day. Basically designed for all the people that are working at home.
Brady Bogan
Is it?
Brett
That's what they're saying. What you're assuming Working naked day is celebrated the first Friday of February. The holiday is suggested, but it's actually about working from home.
Brady Bogan
Right.
Brett
The naked part is optional.
Brady Bogan
You could do that every day if you want.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
I'm trying to think if at any given point, Working Naked day would be a benefit or a curse in this building. And so far I'm again, I go back, there's Moynihan, Ned, naked. First thing in my mind, yeah, we can't have this thing. We can't have this deck carried away. Probably a couple people to be curious about, but for the most part, we.
Brett
Had a former employee husband work naked.
Brady Bogan
Oh, that's right. That lady's husband would sit at the computer because the air conditioner wasn't on. His wife wouldn't let him run the ac. He got naked and drunk and text. All of us for some reason told us that his marriage was over. I responded and was not met with anything. Kind couple of basis fun facts. I forgot about naked co worker's husband being mad at all of us for some reason.
Brett
According to pew research, men who have been divorced or widowed are much more likely to want to remarry than women in the same position. 29% of previously married men want to tie the knot again, compared to just 15% of previously married women.
Brady Bogan
Watch this. Brett, why do you suppose that is? You got the answer. What? Who's gonna do the laundry?
D
Well, that's obvious. I was gonna say dishes, but either way, I'm good with that.
Brady Bogan
I mean, men want to get remarried because it's like I want to do all that stuff. Somebody's got it.
Brett
Abraham Lincoln had a Confederate five dollar bill on him when he was assassinated. Apparently he picked it up as a souvenir when he'd gone to Virginia earlier that month.
Brady Bogan
Memories for Lincoln.
Brett
It's bad luck.
Brady Bogan
He basically kept a scalp.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
Yeah. It's like Tom Brady keeping helmets of the teams he beat in the Super Bowl.
Brett
A lot of people didn't know this, but Harry Carey spent more time broadcasting for the St. Louis Cardinals.
Brady Bogan
A lot more.
Brett
25 years with the Cardinals, 16 with the.
Brady Bogan
He was only with the cubs from, like, 82 to 97. And then it's because he fell down the stairs and couldn't do it anymore. He was the St. Louis Cardinals. He was a mainstay in St. Louis till he banged Augie Bush's wife.
D
Oh, is that what happened?
Brady Bogan
Yeah.
D
Oh, okay.
Brady Bogan
He started having sex with the owner of the team's wife.
Brett
They were just friends.
Dick Toledo
Good friends.
Brady Bogan
Did you ever hear the. The broadcast where he was fired?
Brett
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
It's unreal. Like, it's. So. Did we listen to that in here? Was that in here?
Dick Toledo
Not on the air, but yeah. You sent it to us. I still haven't found it.
Brady Bogan
It's unreal. Like, just. Harry finds out his contract's not being renewed, and the AP picks it up before he knows, while the game's going on, hey, I guess I'm not coming back next year. This just released on the ap. Well, somebody could have had some courage between innings to come in and let me know before they leaked it to the press. That's how this team runs two and one down there to Porter.
D
So he finished the game.
Brady Bogan
He did professionally. Said thank you and goodbye to everybody. And, you know, he was none too pleased. You could hear it. And he, you know, he started to say a lot of nice stuff, but the whole game became about, like, his contract. Like, it was weird and. But it was awesome because he still.
D
With Dutchy.
Brady Bogan
I think Dutchie was there, but he was still boning Augie Bush's wife. I think it was Augie Foggy 3 or Augie 4. I don't remember which one it was. But the owner of the Cardinals was Augustus Bush. Also owned Budweiser.
Brett
Was that. It was a different broadcast where he. He regretted. Where he's like, I'm a hams man now. No, no longer.
Brady Bogan
Oh, well, that was. Yeah. When Budweiser got mad. I think that was when. Because he went and broadcast for the Orioles for a year, and I think he was a hams man in Baltimore. And then he went to the White Sox. I think it might be Shaffers or something. When he went to the Cubs, he was a Cub fan. Bud man again. Yeah, he was. His story is, they need to make a Harry Carey movie. It would be too cartoonish because of the way he behaved that you'd have to cartoon. Well, the actor that plays Harry would have to play it close. Closer in. You couldn't be the extreme caricature of Harry and Have the movie be interesting. Holy cow, I'm gonna have sex with Auggie Bush's wife here today. Boy, oh boy, do I love sex. Like, you couldn't have that broadcast, Harry. You'd have to have the one that sits in the room. I'll thinking about maybe killing myself. You know, one of those, like, introspective. It's just not working out here in St. Louis.
Brett
In France, the Ecological Transition Agency, which is like the EPA here, they want to give the people of France a little advice. They're recommending that you wash your shirts after five wear.
Brady Bogan
Oh, God. The stereotype is true.
Dick Toledo
That's a record for France.
Brady Bogan
Five days, they're telling them, try five, because they're going for much longer, evidently. Oh, my God.
Brett
It's just trending because conservatives in France want to scrap the whole agency to save money. So they're pushing this story, saying, hey, this is why we want to get away rid of this agency.
Brady Bogan
So they've got a little doge of their own.
Brett
They're saying, you know, the laundry takes up so much water and soap. And by cutting back and not.
Brady Bogan
Oh, this is cutting back, this isn't. Yeah, I thought you were saying, wear.
Brett
It five times before you wash it. Don't wash it every time after one.
Brady Bogan
I thought they were putting a limit, like saying, how about we wash it after five wears? Because French people stink. That's like, everybody's known.
Brett
It didn't help that stereotype.
Brady Bogan
So basically they're saying, give a time break. But what. But it's a. It's dumb because why don't you everyone wear your clothes five times before you wash? And all the French frogs were like, this is what we're doing now. That's why we smil. Nothing has changed.
Brett
Why so often?
Brady Bogan
Sacre bleu. Five with the waste. All this water. Let's go for 20.
Brett
In Fayette County, Tennessee, at the Lagrange Moscow Elementary School, this teacher, Brandy Murphy, was walking down the hallway, passing by one of the students. There's a boy she passed by, squares off with him as they're walking the hallway, knees him.
Brady Bogan
Oh, man.
Brett
Drops the kid. Kid drops his bottle. She keeps walking. The kid's now on the floor crying.
Brady Bogan
Yeah.
Brett
Then they. They have the. It's all on video. She comes back, puts the water bottle next to the kid and walks off. Leaves him crying again.
Brady Bogan
Man, she got fired. Well, yeah. Yeah, can't do that. What color is this crime?
Brett
Oh, yeah, she got fired.
Brady Bogan
What color is this crime?
Brett
Britney or Brandy?
Brady Bogan
Oh, wait, white, White.
D
Oh, yeah.
Brett
Brandy.
Brady Bogan
Brandy. Murph. Brandy's little. No, that's why. That's hillbilly. It's very hillbilly. Super white crime. What are we looking at? Beulah Ball. Oh, my God. Ridiculous.
Dick Toledo
Worthy of being a Brandy.
Brett
She walked right by.
Brady Bogan
Threw a knee into the student.
Brett
Now it's time, Brandy.
D
Leave me in the guts and I'll do it again.
Brady Bogan
You read on me, Science News.
Brett
How's that feel? Now it's time for some science news.
Brady Bogan
Nothing you know about it. Every week. Come on, man, Things change. Nothing's changed. Oh, for Christmas.
Brett
Now it's time, man.
Brady Bogan
Here it comes. I'm not even gonna try to film it.
Brett
Hello, my friends. Brady Bogan here with your science news. This is a little update on that asteroid that's 300ft wide.
Brady Bogan
It's closer. I saw it last night.
Brett
It's moved up to from 1.3% chance of hitting us to a 1.9.
Brady Bogan
It's moving in again.
Brett
We. You know, it's almost 2%. Fire Earth in 2032.
Brady Bogan
Is it 2032 or 2132?
Brett
There's a chance it could hit in 2032.
Brady Bogan
What? Wait a minute. Because they said last night that it wouldn't be, like, till 2080 before we even knew if it was close enough to, like, 21. Something.
Brett
Well, they say there's a much larger asteroid.
Brady Bogan
Oh, maybe that's the one.
Brett
That's one. That's happening in 2180.
Brady Bogan
There it is. That's the one.
Dick Toledo
Okay, 2080.
D
Willis and Buscemi and the rest of.
Brady Bogan
The riggers and throw them up there. Let somebody else figure this out. Yeah, don't celebrate it. Morning sickness. 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness. It's. Idiots. You're the problem. You're not allowed to talk anymore because you. You invent it sometimes. Like, you try to make things happen, like you're celebrating it too much. His rhymes are funny to. Only him. Don't. Only natural. No more augmentation. Don't. He said it. We all heard it. And then you're like, do what? No more of that. Anyway, why are we warning people about 2182? Leave a note on the fridge if they find it. That's fine.
Brett
In one week, it went, you know, almost half a percent. And we're supposed to hit. Yeah, 2032.
Brady Bogan
Keeping an eye on it.
Dick Toledo
Break in case of asteroid.
Brady Bogan
Well, no, just a note. Like a sticky thing that says, hey. Hey.
Dick Toledo
Don't forget.
Brady Bogan
We got this whole thing plotted out. Once it starts creeping up on 2150. Either way, take a look for that thing. If it's getting closer, we know.
Brett
And AI News. Rumor has it that Alexa is getting a big update upgrade too, and it could be even smarter than ChatGPT.
Brady Bogan
It's going to keep going back.
Brett
You have to pay for it, though. Like, 10 bucks a month.
Brady Bogan
I saw a thing last night. Brett, you and I will never leave the house. I thought porn was going to be the thing that made Virtual reality and AI a drug. 1967, Las Vegas.
D
Oh, man.
Brady Bogan
You can walk the streets. You're there. It's recreated.
D
It's on YouTube or something.
Brady Bogan
All of it. No, it was on a news thing and said this is what they're working on. The Fitz and I go back and forth with old. He doesn't. Mostly he sends me old videos of people driving down the strip in the 60s, and then it overlaps to what's there now. And he did a thing last night about the building of the frontier. And then it's every 10 years what it looked like after. It's amazing. But they did this thing where it was AI, where, I mean, you can't tell. It's not just sitting in a room like we are. Except for there it is. The one thing they did. They're gonna, by the time they have this technology available to just pop some glasses on and go hoofing it through and feel it. They're gonna do smells and AI will be able to recreate the cigarettes and the sounds and all that. Right now, it looked unreal, like everybody was in the 60s clothes, and it was exactly what the inside of that building would have looked like. It was so cool.
Brett
In animal news, scientists have found a fungus that grows on rocks, and if it gets on spiders, it basically kills the spider and they become zombie spiders. The fungus controls the body.
Brady Bogan
Oh, I've seen that. Yeah.
Brett
That's supposed to be, like, happening to other stuff, but this is a new one. Over in the uk, they found it.
Brady Bogan
But the animal's actually dead. But the fungus moves the animal's body, keeps it alive. I don't know that it's still a venomous, like, biting thing, but it's just the host moves around like a car, like it's like their vehicle.
Brett
As long as they can keep the meat fresh, right?
Brady Bogan
Yeah.
Brett
Rabbits, they find, get their calcium from eating their own teeth. A rabbit's. The teeth are constantly growing, and that's why they chew so much to grind them down, and that kind of grinds up the teeth. They swallow that calcium and then this is a now a proven fact that killer whales hunt great white sharks. And when they get them, all they do is eat the liver.
Brady Bogan
No kidding. They waste a lot spirit and they.
Brett
Can surgically remove that liver.
Brady Bogan
Wow. So the great. So the great white shark and the killer. The killer whale, sort of the European of the sea, where they just go waste all that meat and stuff.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
Interesting.
Brett
Well, that, that meat doesn't go to waste.
Brady Bogan
But that's what we as Europeans, it hits the bottom. That's true. Somebody will eat it.
Brett
It's a buffet.
Brady Bogan
But I mean, technically that's what Whitey said about the buffaloes. And the Indians were very upset. Somebody will eat the rest of this. We just want parts. And they would just skin the buffalo and the meat would stay and rot.
Brett
That's your science news. It looks like Starbucks baristas are already complaining about doodling on your cups because the new campaign is they're gonna start.
Brady Bogan
Have a nice day, draw flowers, not.
Brett
Try not to write your name, hammer a name still. But they're kind of burning out on it, right?
Brady Bogan
Well, they, they're. You're asking them, take your three, you.
Brett
Know, put a heart on it. But then people, some of the baristas are thinking, oh, now customers think we're flirting.
Brady Bogan
Oh, it's leading incels to believe that the girl actually likes them.
D
Idiots. Go to the strip club.
Brady Bogan
Here. The advice has always been you can't the help and the help doesn't want you. They're paid to be nice to you. They're not flirting. They're paid to be nice to you.
Dick Toledo
Also, advice for the Phoenix open this weekend.
Brady Bogan
Oh, the girls that are working, they do not want to have sex with you. The workers. Yeah. You're gonna find one in and amongst the crowd.
Dick Toledo
Like you say, she's gonna be the one in heels sunk into this.
Brady Bogan
Right? There's girls looking for a mate.
Brett
I thought you were talking to me about the bartenders. Oh, that's definitely the bartender meals there every year.
Brady Bogan
They don't want to you, they want your money and that's they're being extra nice and they dress like sluts so you give them more money.
Brett
They're good, they're great.
Brady Bogan
But don't be fooled into thinking that's flirting because. Follow him. A few people go down a couple more booths and see what they're saying to them. It's the same pattern.
Brett
This morning was a prime example of a guy that was trying to.
Brady Bogan
I don't think he was hitting on anyone.
Brett
It went the Wrong way.
Brady Bogan
The Nazi. I'm pretty sure he just went over. That's why I don't think it started.
Brett
Mountain. They said, no, I'm pretty sure that.
Brady Bogan
The first words out of your mouth, hey, do you know what we should do with Mexicans at the border? And then it includes slitting their throats. I'm pretty sure that's not his opening line. That's like playing Snaps with the girls. Learn Snaps and go show that. That's. That's a guaranteed bar winner. Even still, now that the Internet. Internet's given the game away. If you know how to play Snaps, chicks act like that, like you sent them to another planet. Snaps is the most. I can't tell you the rules, but if you know somebody knows how to play, have them teach it to you. It's. It's a girl killer. I used to watch this. My dopey buddy Kevin. It wins women over. Like, he's hip, like he's hypnotized them. It's the best game I've ever seen in my life. Have you ever played it? Do you know what it is? I'll teach you guys after. Find someone, even Google it online, but find somebody who knows the code of.
Brett
Reading, of reading a mind or your friend's mind.
Brady Bogan
Yeah, Snaps is like. Like we. Can you whisper something in his ear and he can tell you.
Brett
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
Without. And nobody says, you know, it's amazing to watch people react to Snaps. Snaps is amazing. And it works. Even when you're. You know, it always works.
Dick Toledo
So AI says Gemini on Google says the rules of Snaps are, no, no.
Brady Bogan
Don'T tell the rules.
Dick Toledo
Oh, you said, no.
Brady Bogan
No, I don't want the rules. No, the opposite. Nobody wants. You learn it on your own. Gotcha. Yeah. Because then you're giving it away, and then it's not a. It's. You have to. You know, most chicks aren't going to know what snaps are, but the ones that do know, you're. You're trying to hypnotize. You're trying to put them under a spell. Because it's amazing how they fall under the spell.
Brett
If you're a big fan of wearing surfwear like Quicksilver, Billabong, Volcom, you're not gonna be able to find it in the stores anymore. They're closing 100 locations across the United States.
Brady Bogan
Internet only shutting it down.
D
I wear Volcom.
Brady Bogan
I used to.
Brett
Liberated Brands. Is the company behind that. They filed for bankruptcy.
Dick Toledo
Probably better to go just online, isn't it?
Brett
For most people, but it'll be Interesting to see if the brands just shut down like Ed Hardy did back, I.
D
Don'T know, build a bong or Ed Hardy had Quicksilver were still around.
Brett
Yeah, they're out there.
Brady Bogan
It did. I'm just thinking of that time down at the Rula Boula when Kevin had sex with a supermodel who was about 6 1. Kevin was about 5 5. He looked like if something a shrinky dink of Conan O'Brien. And he said he guessed Sandra Bullock. And this girl's life changed, like right in front of me. How did you do that? Well, we have a connection. Seriously, how did you do that? Show me.
Brett
It's not a game.
Brady Bogan
Like you whispered into my friend's ear and I can read what people are thinking. Next thing you know, they're in the car and you see a 6 foot 1 inch reddish blond hair just blablab, blab, blab. And Kevin's little stupid Irish face. How does that game work? It works.
Brett
The organizers of the 2025 International Cherry Blossom Festival is happening in Macon, Georgia this year. They want to make the event even more special by trying to get in the Guinness world record for the largest kazoo ensemble. God, they need 5,190 kazoo players.
Dick Toledo
What time do you and Kirby leave?
Brady Bogan
Yeah, you guys will definitely be part of.
Brett
It's scheduled for March 28th. We've got a little time.
Brady Bogan
You can drive. Ugh. Keep me away from that.
Brett
Imagine no sound.
Brady Bogan
Some guy says your mom is so fat she rocked herself to sleep trying to get up. That kind of snaps. No, that's different. You don't want to. You don't want to tell a girl your mom is so fat she left the house in heels, came home in flats. Snaps. The name of the game is snaps. That's all you have to. That's amazing. Yeah, if you started to just street insult the girl, maybe she'd be into it. Your mama's teeth so yellow. I can't believe it's not butter. Will you go out with me?
Brett
I got three quick pretty videos. First one's a dude getting huge in the weight room doing bench press. I don't think he chooses the best spotter.
Brady Bogan
It's a.
Brett
It's a girl.
Brady Bogan
It's a girl. And the bench is on his neck at one point. Oh, no, she helps.
Dick Toledo
She's got an apron on.
Brady Bogan
She just helps balance it. Yeah, she does it. She's a good woman. She's got an apron on in the gym. Even hits his chest. Oh, he's not going to get that up. He needs. He needs the spotter to help. This is £400. Oh, she pulls it right up over to his neck.
Brett
I think the guy's gone.
Brady Bogan
It's under his neck. Oh, he's. He's out. Cold feet are gone. He's trying to lift with his body. She can't do it. This is choking him to death. There's no. Takes him weights off, dummy. Oh, yeah, there you go. Just let it go. Slide under, slide under. Oh, my.
Brett
Trying to pick up the one end.
Brady Bogan
It's crushing him. It is crushed. Use it as a fulcrum. Tilt it 45 degrees. I'll roll over. Oh, he's off the bench. He's alive.
Brett
Pinched.
Brady Bogan
He's in there. He's okay, though. It's much better.
Brett
He made it.
Brady Bogan
His spotter is a weak lady in an apron. That's. Oh, my goodness on him for picking. Yep.
D
I mean, come on.
Brady Bogan
Morning sickness. Medicate K. Holmberg's morning sickness. That's for him. Thinking he could throw that weight up on his own. Anyway, I got this. Oh, man. It's closely. Bounces it off the chest and then that's it.
Brett
I can't believe that.
Brady Bogan
Puts it on his neck.
Dick Toledo
Says it's 165 kilograms. So what's at 325?
Brady Bogan
Is that right?
Brett
Yeah. Well, there's three.
Brady Bogan
No, I don't know how I'm not working that out. That's £3 is 165.
Brett
365, maybe.
Brady Bogan
363. Look what Toledo said. Good guessing. I'm impressed.
Brett
This next one's a fry festival dude standing on some elect power.
Brady Bogan
He's up on the power lines. Is this in the States? I don't see him. Where is he? Oh, oh, he's right up on the. Yeah. Oh, he's up on the post. He's way up there. Oh, he's on fire. Oh, now he's. Now he's falling down. He's. Well done. Wow, That's a lot of people watching that.
Dick Toledo
Don't get too many consonants together, Brady.
Brady Bogan
Yeah. Be careful. You almost said cook again. Why celebrate it? You thought you heard a slur. Christ.
Dick Toledo
I'm not celebrating.
Brett
Last one's a little.
Brady Bogan
I'll be the one pointing things out around here. Don't you start doing it. Get in trouble. I didn't even hear that one. You made him say it again. Oh, it's a lady with her arm all the way in a pig's ass. Or pig. I don't know what that is. I don't know what you're saying, but if something to do with putting your arm all the way in a pig's butt, what's the purpose of this?
Brett
I don't know. The little one scampering there should not pull another one out.
Brady Bogan
Oh, is that. Is that a pig vagina?
Brett
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
Oh, I thought it was its butt. My God. Yikes. This is what every birth in Georgia looks like. Just reach into that pig and pull him out. Yep.
Dick Toledo
It's bad enough to see on his.
Brady Bogan
I get it, Brady. The Macon bacon joke. Yeah. Okay, don't. He looked at me with so much pride, I had to look away in Macon. Okay. Yep. I know where you're going. Shouldn't use Georgia. Should use Mississippi or Alabama.
Brett
Georgia is where that teacher was from. That's where you got it.
Brady Bogan
All right. What do you got, Bert?
D
All right, let's try this out.
Dick Toledo
Try this out.
Brett
Mild. Mild today.
Dick Toledo
No, it sounds like he's experimenting with new things.
Brady Bogan
Let's see what we got.
D
Hang on. See if my computer is gonna.
Brady Bogan
Everybody's got new IT Guy came in here and. Screw. Everything is slow now. Make. All right, here we go.
D
Maybe.
Brady Bogan
Nothing.
Brett
It's fighting.
Brady Bogan
Here we go.
D
I think. Okay. Got it. All right, we'll start with this one here, guys. In the sewer.
Brady Bogan
Oh, he's in a sewer. And he's taking a bite of a poo that is hanging from the. Is he mentally challenged?
Brett
It looks like it.
Brady Bogan
Down syndrome. And he's eating feces. He's down syndrome. He's got something more than downs. And he is eating handfuls of orange. It's inside the pumpkin poop. Oh, my God. Oh, man.
Brett
There's an Oompa Loompa.
Brady Bogan
Why would a Down syndrome person be in the sewer?
D
How about this one?
Brett
Holy Mountain.
Brady Bogan
Very. Oh, he's dead Fat. No piece.
Brett
He's gonna spend some work. Okay.
Brady Bogan
Okay. I can help with this.
Dick Toledo
Putting in any work.
Brady Bogan
I will. I'm an expert on this because they are sitting on what's called a liberator sex bed.
Dick Toledo
Okay.
Brady Bogan
The Liberator sex bed is for two people. It's a curved kind of almost. It looks like a human body. Eight. Half of an eight. But she is 450 pounds of African American woman. And he is 160 pounds of Caucasian man. And he is in the curve, which is outside on a towel for some reason. I bet you they learned the hard way that that has to be outside. His face is buried in her massive ass. And then they're just bouncing on each other. Where do you Go from there. Like the Liberator's act. Pretty neat bed.
D
Yeah.
Brady Bogan
Rolls you into different positions. Years and years ago, had a Liberator.
D
It's got to be a weight limit to it, though.
Brady Bogan
My old English sheepdog got diarrhea all over it.
Brett
And that's what you said?
Brady Bogan
No, that's what happened. Trust me, it's still happening. You think I was trying to get rid of it? What do you. Not you. I wanted that thing in my house. I looked at an open house once, and at the end of the bed, there was one of those. And I went and told the real estate agent. I'm like, hey, not for nothing, but in this classy place over here at the country club, that's a sex bed at the end. No, it's just. It's like a little setty. And I'm like, no, I'm looking up. It's. It's called the Liberator. And I showed it to the real estate agent. She lost her mind. We've got to get that out of here. Like, yeah, you do, because it's proof this was a filth house. That dude's putting that out as a place to sit and put his shoes on at the end of the bed. What's in his closet?
Dick Toledo
Did you say you saw the eyelet hook in the crafter? Oh, that was your house?
Brady Bogan
Yeah, that was when I had it. Well, I had an eyelet over the bed for a sex swing. And when I was selling my house, I thought, nobody's gonna notice that. Everybody. Oh, look, a sex swing island over. I know what's going on in here. Like, it was for potted plants. Nobody puts potted plants over their bedside. Not that heavy duty. That was a big. And I'm like, jesus Christ. And then I was like, you know what? If you know about it, yours bad.
Brett
You should buy this house.
Brady Bogan
Yeah, it's good for you. I was in there when trying to leave, and they did the open house, and they didn't know I owned the house. And I'm leaving the bathroom. Guys like, look, honey, points of the thing. A lot of action going on in here. Like, oh, boy.
Dick Toledo
Think it could your eyelet support that?
Brady Bogan
No, it's 200. 205 pounds.
Dick Toledo
So you couldn't do both of you.
Brady Bogan
You don't both get in.
D
She's the one in it.
Brady Bogan
Yeah, you put her in it. You start whipping around.
D
And if you need more than 205.
Brady Bogan
Yeah, if you got a 200. Look, the day you have the talk with your wife that she doesn't she? Maxes out the weight capacity of the sex wing. They better come with papers. Yeah, so I hate to break it.
Brett
Why do you have a welder in your bedroom?
Brady Bogan
We should use the sex swing. Well, no, because you're gonna pull the beam down. And here's the divorce papers because Too many quesadillas.
D
I'm not calling Luke from ICON to bring a crane over for you.
Brady Bogan
Okay, we could just fortify it with a secondary. No, we're not building the system. No wife of mine is gonna be pulling support beams down.
Brett
They should bring back a HGTV special on that. Like Homes on Homes. They didn't put it in. Right, right.
Brady Bogan
Look, I'll tell you this. In order to be a decent wife, you should be able to have a sex wing in a card house. That's a good woman. You pull down the cardhouse, you've put on a few too many. That thing there. That lady's £400 if she's a pound. Oh, yeah, and that Swedish guy she's killing underneath, he didn't sign up for that.
Dick Toledo
He is buried in that. What'd you call it? The Liberator.
Brady Bogan
Yeah, it's not as squished down as normal. Like, they're pretty tall. She's crushing it.
D
Well, how far? Let's see if they got it on before she gets on the thing there she's climbing on.
Brady Bogan
Oh, it goes down a lot. That dude with the weights on his neck didn't have as much. What's going on outside? Some people doing the yard work.
Dick Toledo
Yep.
Brady Bogan
Hey, you got a guy weed eating next door. Get it home.
Brett
Skin it.
Dick Toledo
Oh, man.
Brett
Slow down, Big Mike.
D
All right, let's jump into this one here.
Brady Bogan
Do you guys smell Mariscas? What is that, fish? Yeah, I do. Why?
D
Let's stick with the same topic.
Brady Bogan
Oh, my God. It's. Her brother is a humongous black man or Indian eating a lot of. Would you consider that McDonald's fries? Sure.
Dick Toledo
I could get my legs that far.
Brady Bogan
He's eating McDonald's. Oh, and here's his fat white dominatrix. Oh, no. She's part of the gay agenda. And straight. And now we're gonna call you up. Oh, no. This is exactly what Fox News said would happen.
Brett
Oh, no. I'm being radicalized.
Brady Bogan
This is the best video I've ever seen. He's 500 plus pounds. Oh, my God. That might be the best video I've ever seen. Okay, can't say that one. Yeah, and then the fat white lady gets on the black guy. And that's where the movie gets stereotypical.
D
I know you don't like compilation videos, so we'll skip.
Brady Bogan
They got lazy at the end of that. You know, it was real creative. And they're like, oh, fat white lady.
Dick Toledo
Cut to the end. We're running out of tape.
D
All right, here we go. This is a dollar store hooker.
Brady Bogan
Oh, no. Family Guy.
D
Well, there's a little bit.
Brady Bogan
All right, I don't want to see stupid. I don't want to see their comedy angle. I just want to see the video. All right, there she is, bent over, taking her pants down.
Dick Toledo
Is that a forest?
Brady Bogan
That was a lot of hair.
D
Just wait.
Brady Bogan
Oh, God, Brett. She's walking around in a public restroom. I guess that's a man, man. I don't know what that is. She's got a dress.
D
I'll give you that much.
Brady Bogan
There is a lot of hair under that dress. Oh, there's her butthole. But wait, there's more. Her butthole has been stomped out. Oh, the whole genital package is not in good condition. Oh, my God. Oh, that's a hammer. It's Nosferatu's face. Her vagina looks like Nosferatu.
Brett
Looks like an orc.
Brady Bogan
Oh, God. Who's filming this? The devil. Okay. Yeah, that is. That's the Ring video. Oh, that I'll never unsee. We'll show that to Melissa Villa, senor. She'll be here.
Brett
Don't do that.
Brady Bogan
Ever been in this bathroom, Melissa?
Dick Toledo
John, I, for one. Can you start a new podcast? Because I'd pay good money to hear you and Doug Hopkins talk about sex houses in Phoenix.
Brady Bogan
Oh, my God.
Dick Toledo
Can't imagine what he's walked into and then followed up with that jingle.
Brady Bogan
Oh, he's told a few stories about stuff he's seen, and not all of it's sex, but. Yeah. Call Doug Hopkins, 1-800-cell now. Wait a minute.
Dick Toledo
Murder houses.
Brady Bogan
Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Awesome. There's been murders, there's been deaths, there's been hoarders, there's been drugs. There's been all of it.
Dick Toledo
We've. I think we've talked about this before. Are you required to divulge if it's been a murder house?
Brady Bogan
I don't think you have to anymore.
D
Like, in this state, but I think some states you do, if I'm not mistaken.
Brady Bogan
Brett would know. All right. Anything else, or is that the last one we close with? Dollar Store Hooker? Good. Have it up on the screen for Melissa when she comes.
Dick Toledo
Oh, God.
Brady Bogan
Don't Melissa Photoshop it? Melissa Villasenor at the Tempe Improv. See what she says. No, I'm doing it. There you go, everybody. That's your Brady Report. It's 98, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect.
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Episode Summary (02-07-25)
Release Date: February 7, 2025
Host: John Holmberg with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Station: 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio
The episode kicks off with Brady Bogen discussing recent developments at the Waste Management Phoenix Open, Arizona's premier golf tournament. He highlights the new drinking regulations implemented at the event:
Brady Bogan [00:35]: "They've limited you to eight drinks now. So they've pulled you back from 10 to 8. My God. What are we supposed to do with that?"
Bogan expresses frustration over the restriction, questioning how attendees are expected to enjoy the event with the reduced allowance. He also mentions the logistical challenges, such as increased waiting times and limited access to tents for food and beverages.
Brett introduces several national observances, setting a lighthearted tone for the discussion:
Brett [02:25]: "Happy National Bubblegum Day. Happy... Hug an addict or alcoholic day. And National Working Naked Day."
The hosts delve into the nuances of "National Working Naked Day," clarifying that while the concept is optional, it primarily celebrates remote work flexibility rather than actual nudity.
The conversation shifts to relationship dynamics, referencing Pew Research findings on remarriage tendencies:
Brett [03:49]: "According to Pew Research, men who have been divorced or widowed are much more likely to want to remarry than women in the same position. 29% of previously married men want to tie the knot again, compared to just 15% of previously married women."
Brady humorously suggests traditional gender roles as a possible explanation:
Brady Bogan [04:08]: "Why do you suppose that is? ... Who's gonna do the laundry?"
The hosts share intriguing historical tidbits, including an odd fact about Abraham Lincoln and a scandal involving broadcaster Harry Carey:
Brett [04:27]: "Abraham Lincoln had a Confederate five dollar bill on him when he was assassinated. Apparently, he picked it up as a souvenir when he'd gone to Virginia earlier that month."
Brady Bogan [05:06]: "Harry Carey was only with the Cubs from, like, '82 to '97. ... He fell down the stairs and couldn't do it anymore. He was a mainstay in St. Louis till he banged Augie Bush's wife."
These stories add a historical and sensational flair to the episode, blending humor with unexpected facts.
Brett brings attention to France's Ecological Transition Agency and its controversial advice on laundry practices:
Brett [07:30]: "In France, the Ecological Transition Agency... they want to give the people of France a little advice. They're recommending that you wash your shirts after five wears."
Brady sarcastically reacts to the suggestion, reinforcing common stereotypes:
Brady Bogan [07:44]: "So they're saying, give a time break. But it's dumb because why don't you everyone wear your clothes five times before you wash?"
A concerning incident is discussed involving a teacher at Lagrange Moscow Elementary School:
Brett [07:30]: "At Lagrange Moscow Elementary School, teacher Brandy Murphy was walking down the hallway, passing by one of the students. She squares off with him as they're walking and knees him in the junk. The student, covered on video, is left crying."
The hosts condemn the teacher's actions, emphasizing the severity of the misconduct:
Brady Bogan [09:58]: "She threw a knee into the student... That's ridiculous."
Brady introduces the science news segment with updates on a potentially hazardous asteroid:
Brett [10:15]: "Here's a little update on that asteroid that's 300ft wide. It's moved up from a 1.3% chance of hitting us to a 1.9%."
The discussion clarifies the asteroid's projected impact timeline, noting adjustments in probability:
Brady Bogan [10:57]: "It's moving in again. Is it 2032 or 2132?"
The hosts touch on advancements in artificial intelligence, specifically Alexa's upcoming enhancements:
Brett [12:38]: "AI News: Rumor has it that Alexa is getting a big upgrade and could be even smarter than ChatGPT."
Brady humorously reminisces about past AI expectations:
Brady Bogan [12:51]: "I thought porn was going to be the thing that made Virtual Reality and AI a drug. 1967, Las Vegas."
A fascinating discovery about a fungus affecting spiders is highlighted:
Brett [14:22]: "Scientists have found a fungus that grows on rocks, and if it gets on spiders, it basically kills the spider and they become zombie spiders. The fungus controls the body."
Brady adds details on how the fungus operates:
Brady Bogan [14:42]: "The fungus moves the animal's body, keeps it alive. It's like their vehicle."
Additional science topics include rabbit dental health and killer whale hunting behaviors:
Brett [14:44]: "Rabbits get their calcium from eating their own teeth. Their teeth are constantly growing, so they chew to grind them down, swallow the calcium, and killer whales hunt great white sharks, eating only their livers."
The team discusses new Starbucks policies discouraging customers from doodling on cups:
Brett [15:47]: "Starbucks baristas are already complaining about doodling on your cups because the new campaign is they're gonna start saying, 'Have a nice day, draw flowers, not write your name.'"
Brady humorously critiques the misinterpretation of friendly interactions:
Brady Bogan [16:22]: "They're thinking, 'Oh, now customers think we're flirting.' They're paid to be nice to you. They're not flirting."
The decline of popular surfwear brands is a topic of concern:
Brett [19:08]: "If you're a big fan of wearing surfwear like Quicksilver, Billabong, Volcom, you're not gonna be able to find it in the stores anymore. They're closing 100 locations across the United States."
Brady reflects on the shift to online retail and past brand survivals:
Brady Bogan [19:21]: "Internet only shutting it down... I used to wear Volcom."
A significant portion of the episode involves reacting to various user-submitted videos, ranging from workout mishaps to bizarre encounters:
Workout Accidents: The team watches videos of individuals experiencing dangerous situations in gyms, including heavy weights causing harm when spotters fail.
Brady Bogan [21:22]: "He's on fire, now he's falling down. Well done."
Sex Swing Mishaps: Anecdotes about the misuse of sex swings and the potential hazards involved.
Brady Bogan [26:24]: "The Liberator sex bed is for two people... putting your shoes on at the end of the bed. What's in his closet?"
Graphic and Disturbing Content: The hosts view unsettling videos, leading to graphic descriptions and humorous censorship attempts.
Brady Bogan [32:18]: "There is a lot of hair under that dress. Her vagina looks like Nosferatu."
The episode concludes with light-hearted banter and reflections on the diverse topics covered. The hosts encourage listener interaction and tease future content, maintaining the show's signature blend of humor and irreverence.
Notable Quotes:
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness offers a whirlwind tour through current events, personal anecdotes, and intriguing science news, all delivered with the show's characteristic humor and candid discussions. Whether you're a regular listener or new to the show, the diverse range of topics ensures there's something engaging for everyone.