02-10-25 - BR - MON - By 2028 70 Million People Will Have Tried Ozempic - Drunk Man Crashes Bible Study Thinking They Were Human Trafficking - Company Offering Mile High Club Hot Air Balloon Rides

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode Summary: February 10, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Co-hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Release Date: February 10, 2025

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1. UFOs, CIA Revelations, and Moon Colonization

[00:39 - 03:59]

The episode kicks off with Brady Bogen delving into recent leaks concerning UFOs and CIA activities. He expresses concern over the proliferation of conspiracy theories, likening them to "a bunch of Alex Joneses." Brady references a CIA document detailing extraterrestrial encounters, including an incident where "aliens turning KGB personnel into stone with a bright exploding light after their craft was shot down" ([00:39] Brady).

Brady further speculates on President Obama's alleged discussions about "houses on the moon," questioning the motives behind such initiatives. He suggests that building extraterrestrial habitats may indicate an underlying crisis on Earth that authorities are concealing. This leads to a satirical portrayal of a moon press conference with President Obama, highlighting the absurdity of extraterrestrial colonization plans ([03:35] Dick Toledo; [03:37] Brady).

Notable Quote:
Brady Bogen enthuses, "Why would you want houses on the moon or Mars? Unless you're trying to escape something that only you know about." ([01:45] Brady)

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2. Meal Donations Amidst Ozempic Uptake

[05:32 - 13:39]

The discussion transitions to philanthropic efforts, specifically Fry's initiative to donate "59 million meals to the needy in Arizona." Brady humorously critiques the feasibility of this claim, sharing a personal anecdote about his meal count over the years to emphasize skepticism ([05:32] Dick Toledo; [05:33] Brady).

This segment segues into the topic of Ozempic, a weight loss drug. A Goldman Sachs study is cited, projecting that "by 2028, up to 70 million Americans will have tried Ozempic or similar drugs for weight loss" ([09:14] Brett). Brady raises concerns about the sustainability of weight loss achieved through pharmaceuticals, sharing a cautionary tale of an acquaintance regaining weight after discontinuing Ozempic ([09:50] Brady).

Notable Quote:
Brett Vesely states, "A study from Goldman Sachs estimates that by 2028, up to 70 million Americans will have tried Ozempic or similar drugs for weight loss." ([09:14] Brett)

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3. Super Bowl Monday: Impact on Workforce and Advertising

[07:17 - 09:32]

The hosts discuss the ramifications of Super Bowl Monday, noting that an estimated "22 and a half million American workers plan to miss work" due to Super Bowl-related activities ([07:17] Brett). They examine how the scheduling of the Super Bowl affects advertising strategies and television ratings, reflecting on its historical significance as a "sweeps month" event ([08:54] Brady).

Notable Quote:
Brady Bogen comments, "They just don't go to work because yesterday." ([08:12] Brady)

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4. NHL's Unconventional Goalie Solutions

[14:22 - 15:20]

A segment highlights an extraordinary event in the NHL where "David Ayers, drafted as an emergency goalie for the Hurricane," stepped in when the team's regular goalies were incapacitated due to COVID-19 ([15:20] Dick Toledo). The hosts commend the initiative, describing it as "pretty cool" and appreciating the adaptability of the team ([15:28] Brady).

Notable Quote:
Brady praises, "That's awesome." in reference to the emergency goalie situation ([15:14] Brady).

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5. Traffic Congestion and Its Effect on Dietary Choices

[16:08 - 17:02]

Brett introduces a study from the Journal of Urban Economics, revealing a correlation between heavy traffic and increased consumption of fast food, particularly dinner options ([16:08] Brett). The study suggests that prolonged time in traffic discourages cooking at home, leading individuals to opt for convenient, often less healthy, food choices ([16:26] Brett).

Notable Quote:
Brady counters, "Traffic doesn't make you gain weight. The decision while you're in traffic." ([16:50] Brady)

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6. Mile High Club Balloon Rides: A Valentine's Day Proposition

[22:30 - 24:54]

Brett introduces a unique Valentine's Day offering from "Magical Adventure Balloon Rides," a company in California providing balloon flights aimed at enacting the "Mile High Club." The flights ascend to approximately 3,000 feet, offering privacy with a sheet barrier, catering to couples seeking a discreet romantic experience ([22:30] Brett).

Brady humorously critiques the service, mocking the company's terminology and pricing structure, while expressing doubt about the practicality of achieving privacy at such altitudes ([23:17] Brady).

Notable Quote:
Brett explains, "They take you up about 3,000ft. Mile is, you know, 5,200ft." ([22:30] Brett)

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7. Entertaining Anecdotes and Observational Humor

[17:02 - 32:58]

The hosts entertain listeners with a series of humorous and bizarre anecdotes, including:

• Super Bowl Ads Analysis: Louis Moses is slated to provide insights into last night's Super Bowl advertisements, offering a professional perspective on their effectiveness and impact ([34:46] John).

• Traffic-Induced Accidents: A narrated incident of a car unintentionally trapping a pedestrian under its wheels due to what appears to be a sudden cessation of movement while backing out of a driveway ([31:10] Brady).

• Drone Mishaps: A recount of a failed military drone operation where a bomb attached to a drone causes disintegration of the operator mid-flight, highlighting the perils of inadequate equipment ([30:18] Brady).

Notable Quote:
Brady muses, "Nobody tells stories like that in songs. Bros Before Hoes, Bob Dylan, Harry Chapin. All the great storytellers." ([34:46] Brady)

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Conclusion

The episode weaves through a variety of topics, blending serious discussions on societal issues like UFO disclosures and the widespread use of weight loss drugs with lighthearted banter and humorous storytelling. The hosts maintain an engaging dynamic, providing listeners with both informative content and entertaining commentary.

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Note: This summary omits advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content segments as per the episode's guidelines.

Transcript

[Dick Toledo]

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[Brady]

There's something happening. Boy. I said the people digging in. I All I did was give you the tip of the iceberg and you guys dig in. Creating a whole bunch of Alex Joneses out there. Tell you what, got all this CIA nonsense leaking in the Super Bowl. Chad McDaniel says you got me looking up UFO stuff now. CA document I found aliens turning KGB personnel into stone with a bright exploding light after their craft was shot down. It's a CIA document.

[Brett]

National Enquirer.

[Brady]

Right. Right. Well, that was Men in Black. So the Inquirer was where all the true stories were. I said that. We were just talking about it off here. I said this years ago, Obama started talking about houses on the moon. I remember that speech he gave. And it's not. He's not the first president to do it, but I remember at the time, Republicans were like, yep. And like everything that guy says, you hate houses on the moon is where we're all on the same page. That means you're trying to leave. What don't we know?

[Brett]

And now they're planning on putting up pods up there right now to set.

[Brady]

Let's get some stuff floating around there because something's. Something horrible is about to happen down here. Why would you want houses on the moon or Mars? Unless you're trying to escape something that only you know about.

[Brett]

That's always a big deal. Hey, this planet we found, there might be some water on there, right?

[Brady]

We can't wait. We're still digging around on Mars. Maybe it's a little deeper. Send some out. If there's water, we're leaving. Like, why are. What. What's the hurry? You don't know? Trust us. This about to go sideways.

[Brett]

Like, okay, how many of those movies were there in that spaceship? And they're asleep. They don't wake up for two years until they finally get to the.

[Brady]

Yep. They put you in that state. That's the thing at Sphere in Vegas. Is they the two last people or whatever. They're like you're. You gotta leave. Earth sucks. And they, they pop them with sleeping drugs, float them around in a pod and then they come back hundreds of years later and there's nothing left and they gotta repopulate. Kind of an Adam and Eve thing. But they, you know, they wake up. They did that with Jennifer Lawrence movie that's coming.

[Brett]

Moonraker.

[Brady]

Yeah, we've had this in our brains for a long time. Like to knock them out, float around for a couple years and then when the dust settles from what we've done a terrible thing. But Obama was, you know, we've got to get some houses, planets that aren't Earth. Why? Anyway, that's the end of this press conference. No, no, there's a. Why is a great question. Why? You know, human endeavor, spirit exploration. Those are just words. Why are we. Why are we building? Why is Beezer up there on the moon? Just getting some dwellings for who? Why? Anyway, ask a Republican if that's a good idea. And all were like, yup, like you guys are in cahoots. There's something we don't know.

[Dick Toledo]

Fulton Holmes on the moon.

[Brady]

They're not going to advertise.

[Brett]

There's a veranda up there.

[Brady]

That's all you're going to hear is a. Use it. Morning, Bill. How you doing, Obama? It's great on the moon today, isn't it? It's better. Nurse. They're all dying down there. Guys want to keep it down. President. President street up here in the moon.

[Dick Toledo]

Never thought about this, but I'm gonna need to get you an airlock sound effect.

[Brady]

Yeah. Hey, what's up Rock? Beautiful Earthrise today was a good looking earthrise. Too bad about it. You can kind of hear the screaming at night from the planet. I hear the screaming every morning. I look at the lady sleeping next to me. Jesus Christ. She looks like an alien. We brought her to the right place. That white ass skin. There's no sun. This is terrible. I need to fly back to Earth, get some puss.

[John]

Brock?

[Brady]

No, Bill, you know he can't go back there for a couple years. Yeah, there's something brewing. Not saying it's all the end of the world and stuff, but it just seems awfully fishy that these two can't get along parties can't get along about anything. But when Barack said build some houses on the moon, not a soul said, that's a bad idea.

[Brett]

Fast tracking.

[Brady]

Hurry up, let's let's earmark that. I believe they call it earmark that. Put that in that bill for food for hungry kids in Mississippi that evidently Fries could cover in five minutes. That was a great observation, Toledo. 59 million meals in Arizona. I'm like, over what kind of time period. If we need 59 million meals for needy people, we got us a needy people problem. And they're ravenous appetites. Evidently, I'm still hungry. All right, Needy, calm down.

[Dick Toledo]

We'll get it.

[Brady]

No, no, no, no. If I don't hit my 55.9 million for just me, you know where to go. Go to Fry's. Yeah, go to Fry's. Put your hands out. Give you a five gallon jug of horchata. Anyway, 59. Bold claim. I'd like to see that backed up. And I'm rooting for you, Fries. I hope you're. I hope that's super accurate, but 59 million meals to the needy of Arizona. They're living better than I am. I don't think I've had 59 million meals in my life. 52 years of munching and snacking. From day one, I missed a day. I don't think I've hit 2 million. Do the math. How many days have I been alive? I'll ask Siri. How many days has it been since July 26th, 1972?

[Brett]

Okay.

[Brady]

Oh, boy. It's giving me multiple websites. Oh, okay. It's 19, 192 days. What is 19,192 times three? I've had. I've had around 60,000 meals.

[Dick Toledo]

Well, you're falling short, man.

[Brady]

Yeah. This is to keep me alive forever. Sure. For the whole time. 59 million. That's crazy, Brady. You do multiplied by five. Anyway, it's time for the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our friends. Oh, no, it isn't. Never mind. Hooters gone. Nope, that's habit. Who's decided not to do that anymore? Sponsorship available. Brady reported.

[Brett]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.

[Brady]

Hi.

[Brett]

Happy National Poop Day.

[Brady]

I don't know what that is. Come on.

[Brett]

It's the day after Super Bowl.

[Brady]

Oh, that's right. This is a plumbing problem day.

[John]

Yeah, seven layered dips and wings and everything else.

[Brady]

And yeah, Taco Bell commercials that made everybody order up. We'll talk to Louis Moses a little later this morning about the commercials. But the food flows freely. And there's a lot of beans. Yesterday at the Phoenix Open, that's all they served you was like this meat. And then the Bottom of it was all beans. And then the other option you had was dip like hummus and broccoli. And I'm like, it is. Everybody's gonna take huge dumps. Everything was bean related at the open. Like everybody's crushing beans and chicken fingers.

[Brett]

It's an estimated 22 and a half million American workers plan to miss work.

[Brady]

Today, the Super Bowl Monday and fried three times each. That's amazing.

[Brett]

It was 18.8 million in 2023.

[Brady]

And they just don't go to work because yesterday.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Brett]

The super bowl schedule is set for the next two years and there's a possibility that an 18th regular season game could be added in 2027, 2028.

[Brady]

That's a lot.

[Brett]

That's the case. The entire postseason could be pushed back one another week.

[Brady]

They don't mind being in February. And I don't know if it still works the same for tv, but that used to be a sweeps month, a ratings period that was. I don't know that they do that anymore with clicks and impressions and stuff like they used to. It used to be the most important month of the year was February, May and November for TV ratings. So having the game in February is huge because it sets rates.

[Brett]

We're used to a couple of baseless fun facts. A study from Goldman Sachs estimates that by 2028, up to 70 million Americans will have tried Ozempic or similar drugs for weight loss.

[Brady]

78 million.

[Brett]

70 million in 2028.

[Brady]

All right.

[Brett]

The projected population in 2028 is 355 million with 279 million adults. So that means up to 25% American.

[Brady]

Adults have tried it, have done fat drugs. So it's the, the proverbial. If your fat friend jumped off a bridge, would you do it? So it's, it's making it normal to say, well, 70 million people are doing it, so that's, it's okay. And I suppose it is, but I personally think there's going to be a tumble back thing that might double up. People I know that have done that have struggled after it's over and it piled back on. There's a guy I know who lost quickly. Yeah, 130 pounds. He's probably up about 160 now. Yikes. And it fell off fast and he looked good.

[Dick Toledo]

So wait, gain back to 100 and.

[Brady]

He lost close to 130 pounds. He was a big dude and he looked great. And then he's, he's added on 150. It's back plus. Okay. And that was when it stopped. Yikes. So it is. Definitely.

[Brett]

But I think from what I understand, too, I mean, the drug works. It does. It's up again. How many of us have done. Well, there's a lot of people that do the diets and do the same thing.

[Brady]

Right.

[Brett]

It just. It has to be a lifestyle change.

[Brady]

They work. But, yeah, you can't just go right back to normal once you get to your goal weight because you're going to go the other way. But my feeling is, when you alter it with chemicals and drugs, your body's reaction is different than just, you know, dietary back and forth, which isn't good either. None of it's good, John.

[Dick Toledo]

I looked up the stats. 70 million people have tried Ozempic. Sounds like Fries could have donated 70 million meals right there.

[Brady]

Maybe that's why Fries has so many meals. Nobody's hungry anymore because Ozempics killed our appetite. Sorry, Fries, I couldn't possibly. You're needy and unozempic. Well, I do a lot of walking and dropping some pounds. Yeah, the words you say sometimes.

[Brett]

I mean, who talks like that?

[Brady]

Holmberg's morning sickness. And somebody. Great point. Says, I think they're counting serving sizes because a box of macaroni and cheese serves four.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Brady's all in on it.

[Brett]

I don't know that that's a true. Because if they. If they say that based on serving sizes and stuff like that, that could add more.

[Brady]

Well, you should have included that into your dissertation.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't know. When you. When you say a meal.

[Brady]

Right.

[Dick Toledo]

I just think it's the whole meal.

[Brady]

I'm thinking, like, potatoes and steak and I'm going to take some corn. Yeah. Yeah. Four serving sizes of macaroni, maybe, but still, that's tough to get. Up to 59 million. I don't know what 59 million divided by 4 is, but it's a lot more than what I think we have for needy people. And if each one's only getting one serving size, we're just pissing off the needy. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's not a meal because you're like, what's this? It's your free meal. Come on. It's a bite.

[John]

Cts.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Gave me Kraft Dinner.

[Brady]

I get a whole box. I'm getting one serving size. This is garbage. Wanted the whole box.

[Brett]

Check the box, Dave.

[Brady]

Back when I wasn't needy, I used to eat one of those. No problem. Full bowl.

[Dick Toledo]

Add it to the tote.

[Brady]

That's only. That's four serving sizes in a box of Mac and cheese.

[Dick Toledo]

Four Might even be three now shrink flation.

[Brady]

I. It's two bites. It's just a basic bowl. When it's all done. The craft macaroni and cheese, you don't get a big bowl out of that.

[Brett]

Yeah. You're not. You're supposed to doing a 2 to 4 ounce serving maybe or 2 ounces of.4 ounces.

[Brady]

What am I, a male prostitute? I do a lot more than 2 to 4 ounces.

[John]

It says 2.5 as the serving size.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brady]

Was that six noodles? I'm eating the whole box.

[Brett]

But if you have the rest of the 16 recommended, other things you're supposed to eat with it, your fruits, your vegetables.

[Dick Toledo]

Right. Then is each one of those an individual meal that fries provided?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

I'm gonna go ahead and say that you're not supposed to eat 16 of anything.

[Brett]

No, I was exaggerating on that.

[Brady]

But you know, making sure.

[Brett]

Looking at the food pyramid.

[Brady]

Sure. I've never looked at the food pyramid. You've climbed it several times. I'm impressed.

[Dick Toledo]

They have family sized boxes.

[Brady]

Yeah. The big ones. That's like 10.

[Dick Toledo]

Approximately six servings.

[Brady]

It's only two more approximately six. I don't believe that at all.

[Dick Toledo]

7.25 ounce box, like Brett said, is about three servings.

[Brady]

All right.

[Brett]

In an NHL game, if all the team's goalies are injured, the team has the option to suit up anyone as their goalie.

[Dick Toledo]

They did this, didn't they?

[Brett]

They did this one selling from the stands.

[Dick Toledo]

This wasn't from the stands. Right.

[Brady]

It's a story of an old game though, wasn't it, that somebody from the stands used to play and they knew it and they gave him uniforms to get out there like he was a former goalie. We're out of people.

[John]

Oh man. Yeah, we just get on the pa. Anybody here know how to play goalie?

[Brady]

I think they knew a guy 2020.

[Dick Toledo]

Right before COVID 42 year old, pulled out of the crowd to make his NHL debut.

[Brady]

That was in 2020.

[Dick Toledo]

The game. Yeah.

[Brady]

It's still black and white in my mind. Why?

[Dick Toledo]

David Ayers, drafted as an emergency goalie for the Hurricane.

[Brady]

Oh. So he was on the.

[Dick Toledo]

Usually the Zamboni driver for the minor league team. He was in the.

[Brady]

That's awesome.

[Dick Toledo]

They said, oh.

[Brady]

Because everybody had Covid.

[Dick Toledo]

Because. Dave. Yeah. We need you to come down.

[Brady]

What do you do?

[John]

Go to the gift shop and get a uniform. I mean, because they don't fit it.

[Brady]

Whatever the team's mascot is on your back.

[Dick Toledo]

Left his seat, got half dressed into his Gear on the off chance something might happen to Carolina's. Carolina's second option, Peter Mazarick because their original goalie was injured the day the game before. So he knew it was a possibility.

[Brady]

That's pretty cool.

[Brett]

Colgate started selling a line of frozen dinners in 1982. Failed miserably. Most people associated that logo toothpaste on that TV dinner.

[Brady]

Yuck.

[Brett]

The first person to use the phrase founding fathers was Warren G. Harding when he accepted his party's nomination for President 1920.

[John]

They didn't say Warren G. I was.

[Brady]

Like, oh, regulate regulators, mount up. That was Warren G's speech at inauguration on the LBC. A new study trying to find Mr. Warreny. What's he doing?

[Brett]

New study in the journal of urban economics found heavy traffic makes us gain weight. Comes down to meal choices. Researchers looked at three years worth of traffic and GPS data, and they found that heavy traffic made people more likely to eat fast food, especially for dinner, because they're in their car longer by the time they get home. Last thing you want to do is cook.

[Brady]

Traffic doesn't make you gain weight. The decision while you're in traffic.

[John]

Garbage sauce Moto's went up in value right now.

[Brady]

So I hooks a left on 2, 1. And Lou said to the homie, come on, let's do the shooting Dice. That song's still one of my favorites because there's a mass murder in it. A mass. 16 people. 16 in the clip and one on the whole. Nate dog is about to make some bodies turn cold.

[John]

Don't forget Michael McDonald.

[Brady]

He kills them all. And then they go back to the hookers. They shoot multiple people.

[Brett]

The women, the children.

[Brady]

No, they don't kill any women and children, baby. Just the. Just the dice guys that. They hem them up. They hem up Warren G. Nate dog's got to regulate. What a great song. They should make a movie out of that whole thing because it's just a couple of dudes out trolling for whores. One of them says, look, there's some dice. Pull over. They took his Rolex. They took him My wealth. He looks in the clip and he sees his homie Nate. And Nate. Nate's got his gat and he. And he's mowing him down. It's a tad bit late.

[John]

And a Michael McDonald sample. So it doesn't get any better.

[Brady]

Every. It's perfect.

[Brett]

The Stellantis.

[Brady]

Warren g. Harding is the greatest president of all time because of that. I think that's where. That's just what it is. I'm tweaking to a whole new level. Now I got the whole thing in my head. We're gonna have to play that.

[Brett]

The Stellantis engine plant in Indiana. That's the manufacturing plant that builds engines for Jeeps.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Brett]

Is looking for a psycho poop smear.

[Brady]

There's an employee they're hiring or they're trying to find.

[Brett]

No, they're looking for them. They're trying to find out who's doing it. Someone in the factory is wiping their poop on the bathroom walls, on the disability handlebars, door latches, sinks leaving piles on the floor. And the management at the Kokomo plant has posted stuff.

[Brady]

That's enough. They don't have any cameras.

[Brett]

Well, now they're going to have to look. You know, I don't know how much you can set up cameras now in bathrooms. They're going to have to.

[Brady]

Oh, maybe it's just you said it was on the disability bars, which I don't think they call those that anymore, but disability disabled bars, handy rails, differently abled bars. I don't know. The uneven parallel bars, the. I would guess it's just one of them, right?

[Brett]

You'd narrow it down pretty quick.

[Brady]

The one guy with wheels. Go check under his finger. What's under your fingernails there, Todd? I have trouble getting up. Oh, you're doing it.

[Brett]

We got a guy from Stafford County, Virginia, was charged with breaking and entering. An assault. He was hammered. And I went next door because he thought, oh, there's some traffic. Child trafficking going on or human trafficking.

[Brady]

Sure.

[Brett]

General. Not only. So he went over there, hammered, breaks down the group of people in the house. Knock it off. It was a Bible study.

[Brady]

Oops.

[Dick Toledo]

Although Catholic church.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's a good point.

[Brett]

Still, it wasn't. It was at a house.

[Dick Toledo]

Still. Keep a side. I steal the scripture.

[Brady]

Yeah, I agree.

[Brett]

It.

[Brady]

And Father Dale used to say that too. Over there. It's not in the church. It's at this house I bought filled.

[John]

With kids and video games.

[Brady]

Video games and pool tables and parties.

[Dick Toledo]

And they said it was like an arcade over there, wasn't it?

[Brady]

It was the greatest place in the world. Except for the rapes.

[John]

I mean, there's that.

[Brady]

Okay. If you can get over the rapes. Father Dale built Shangri La. But the rapes. God, I wish that wasn't part of my life for real.

[John]

But it is still stand.

[Brady]

The houses are still there, the church is still there. It should have been burned to the ground building that grooming factory for St. Timothy's and then, you know, and I was Showing up. I didn't believe in it, but that was the coolest place. Free everything. Every video game ever garage was packed full of pools.

[John]

Like the new games too.

[Brady]

Like at that time, everything.

[Brett]

There's two dudes, Aaron Reagan and Alan Richards, both 27 years old. They pulled up next to some cops and asked how to get to Osage beach, which is in Missouri, up in the Ozarks. And the officer says, you're here already. And he looks at the two guys and like look kind of high. Okay, bring out the canine dog. Well, that's a sniffed around for training purposes.

[Brady]

The drug dog, really? Not the canine dog. A dog that sniffs her other dogs.

[Dick Toledo]

Done that too before the canine dog.

[Brady]

Canine dogs, that's like table.

[Dick Toledo]

Mesa, right?

[Brady]

Well, sort of. Only no, no, that's like table.

[Brett]

I always think. You know why I say that? Because it's the K dash 9.

[Brady]

Right.

[Brett]

But the drug sniffing dog, there he is and he found some. Found two grams of meth. So they were trying to find Osage beach, ask for directions, look up and get arrested. They're the dudes.

[Brady]

Oh, they look every bit of Osage, you know, Traveler. Good lord. That's some white trash right there.

[Brett]

And finally, here's a little Valentine's Day suggestion. If you want to join the Mile High Club, sure. There's a company in California, Magical Adventure Balloon rides. You won't have to hide or anything because the Mile High flight, it's got a little sheet on it, gives you your privacy. You can float up. They take you up about 3,000ft. Mile is, you know, 5,200ft.

[Brady]

So it's not half mile high club, three quarters of a mile.

[Brett]

The whole flights three hours long. Pricing for two passengers starts at 1400. But if you want to bring a cuck with you or third person, it's an extra $159. Couldn't afford a fourth.

[Brady]

Can you pay for the extra to get all the way up to 5,200ft?

[Brett]

I don't think so. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brady]

98 Holmberg's Morning Sickness. What's the point, you cheap prick?

[John]

You only got me the half mile up to 3,000.

[Brady]

So get this done fast.

[Brett]

But they say the basket can fit up to 10 people. Not lying down though, but.

[Brady]

So multiple people will be doing it.

[Brett]

Yes, Standing.

[Brady]

Gross.

[Brett]

If you wanted to cucks unite, here's a little picture of a couple in the basket. What it looks like.

[Brady]

Well, there's got to be a guy up there.

[Brett]

The wizard is behind the sheet right there.

[Brady]

Oh, he's. He's cloaked completely. He can smell it and hear it, though.

[Brett]

Stop it. Quit it. You're going too fast.

[Brady]

A lot of hot air up here. I don't even need to hit the. Shut up. You're not supposed to be listening. I think your lady's keeping this thing afloat with her front farts.

[Brett]

Turn up the Drake.

[Brady]

Well, just turn the music up a little bit. Sounds like your lady's got a Kawasaki 250 in her. We're getting too high. Could you make her stop doing that? All right, lady, you're filling her up with too much out here. I gotta throw some dry ice up in this.

[Dick Toledo]

That's supposed to speed buggy it.

[Brady]

You're speed bugging up here. I don't know what's going on. Try a different position. Seriously, we're getting 6,000. Jesus. She's big, too. The one in the gondola, It's. It fits 10 people. As long as she's not one of them.

[Brett]

That's a big lady on that particular ride. No, that's a four person.

[Brady]

No, that's the. The two and two.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh, no. I did this myself.

[John]

I was just gonna say I didn't.

[Brady]

Know that they added that thing in the same spot. In need of some desperate hair. In need. They're both dead, right? Or. No, Warren's still alive. Yeah, Warren's still alive. This might have to be part of the Night of the Singing Dead. This is right after he killed several men. That is my favorite song ever. All right. He kills like the. The video shows shells.

[John]

God damn.

[Brady]

Yeah, he looked in the clip. He sees his homie Nate, and he realized. And even then at the end of that, Warren G's basically like, man, before. Before I got beat up, I was on the same page of getting girls and stuff. But things went sideways and then we had to kill all those people. So luckily, Nate kept his cool and we remembered where those girls were. We're not even a little shook up at the incredible mass shooting we were just a part of.

[Brett]

I got a couple of pretty videos.

[Brady]

I love that song. Oh. All right.

[Brett]

I think the Daytona 500s this weekend coming up. The guy doing a little old timey race car. This is the reason why they redesigned them.

[Brady]

These just old water heaters with a number on the front.

[Brett]

Pretty good.

[Brady]

Yeah. Going about 100 miles an hour. We hit a little dirt there. Oh, he's sideways. Oh, he's dead. He rolled it. And there's no, like, roll bar or Cage for him. Just a helmet that does nothing when your water heater throws you out. Oh, my God. Holy cow.

[Brett]

Next one's a little smackdown. This guy comes walking in a little pissed.

[Brady]

We're at a bank or something.

[Brett]

Officers. I'm not sure if it's a bank.

[Brady]

Those officers, they have maintenance written on their back.

[Brett]

Or is it like an apartment complex? Like, maybe that's a janitor or hotel.

[Brady]

Okay, maybe hotel lobby maintenance people. But this dude is, like, the size.

[Dick Toledo]

Of just, like, Derek Henry.

[Brady]

He looks like. Yeah. Darnell Dockett or. Yeah, there you go.

[Dick Toledo]

Dockett.

[Brady]

He's standing in the lobby. Three very small white. Oh, whitey just punched him right in the throat. Oh. Darnell Dockett is thrown to the ground by the miniature white cop. Oh, my Lord. And now he's trying to.

[Brett]

That's the beginning of it, I think.

[Brady]

Well, this is the start. Okay, so he deserved it.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

He kicks the door in, and he's a big dude, and he turns in that cop throat, punches him. Oh, and just dizzies him. I mean, that's endgame. This is very tactical. Black, which they always say it's not the size of the dog. Oh, man. Excellent work. And people will say that was aggressive. Did you see how he entered the room? He kicked the two front doors off the building. Okay, this is gonna be stupid.

[Brett]

The last one is this hillbilly trying to do an instructional video of how.

[Brady]

To remove the pool cover from your above ground pool.

[Brett]

No, it's a regular.

[Brady]

Okay. Pool, but is that a woman opening your pool is. He's in a body glove wetsuit. Cover up. Yeah, you gotta get the COVID up if you're gonna swim in it. But you want to have fun. Oh, God, I hate this. Here's how you do it. And have fun. Is he gonna hurt himself? If he doesn't hurt himself. I'm mad already. He's in a body glove wetsuit.

[Brett]

Yep.

[Brady]

Climbing a tree next to the pool. He's a good 30ft up. All right, here we go. And I bet you didn't even know. All right, the worst person. He's jumping off of the pool onto the. Or off the ladder, onto the. Oh, my God.

[John]

Okay, now that was worth it.

[Brady]

It was totally worth it because his foot gets the ladder.

[Brett]

He is now really cheap.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah, he is. He's never going to swim again. That's for sure. Unless they put floaties on his wheelchair. I don't like to root for that kind of stuff. Unless you act like that first for a good minute. And that Guy, I'm sorry. Made me laugh. Now he's the one smearing poop all over that facility in Indiana. Nick, dog and the G. Sorry, Brett, what do you got?

[John]

All right, Brady may have me beat today, but.

[Brady]

Oh, my.

[John]

Well, let's still have fun. Here's a little fun with drones.

[Brady]

Okay? A couple of guys out in the woods, they got their big drone. They're holding it over their head. Good sized drone. So those propellers can. Oh, and it had a bomb attached to it for whatever reason. Why did they have a bomb hanging off the bottom of their drone? Well, wasn't it.

[John]

I think it's military. Yeah.

[Brady]

Yeah. Oh, are these. Oh, it's a cruddy military. Where they wear t. Sh. Okay, so this is one of them cruddy militaries where people in tank tops are running the show. Yeah, exactly. Got it.

[Brett]

The other guy's gone.

[Brady]

Like, I have to think the word Laos is nearby.

[Dick Toledo]

There's the half of him.

[Brady]

Yeah. Oh, my God. It blew him. Blew him to bits. So they were planning on. They don't have a better way to launch the drones than by hand. You would think, but, like, paper airplanes over there.

[John]

Well, they couldn't afford uniforms. They're wearing tank tops.

[Brett]

How's the hook holding? The. The explosive? Yeah.

[Brady]

Why would you. Yeah. What is it? The bottom of a paperclip. It's like one of those. Yeah, it's when you lose the. The thing at Christmas and you have to redo with a paperclip.

[John]

A piece of Bubblicious wasn't gonna hold that thing on there.

[Brady]

Wow.

[John]

All right. And everybody always wonders what happens when you leave the house and your dog's there by himself.

[Brady]

Sure, it's a big dog, Some sort of shepherd mix. She's walking out, says goodbye to her big husky shepherd mix. He's up on the couch. He moves the back. Oh, and he just starts. He just starts banging that couch cushion the second the door closed. And I mean. Oh, he's all done.

[John]

Finished.

[Brady]

Oh, wait. He thinks she's coming back. He didn't even. Wait. He's just like. He's just like all married men.

[John]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

Once you hear that garage door shut, it's a jerk festival. When are you coming home? I'll be home, like 20 minutes. Okay. I miss you. Miss you too. You gotta get in this. Get. She got 20 minutes.

[John]

Here's some street surveillance.

[Brady]

All right, Person walk down the street of a. Looks like a regular country. The cars are pointed the right direction on the road.

[John]

Probably European or something.

[Brady]

Could Be, uh. Oh, falls down off the curb. And then. Oh. Oh, it's in a driveway. We didn't see this part of it. A car is now backing out of the driveway. This lady or man, I don't know, fell over the curb and onto the road while the car was backing up. And now it's just parked on the person under the car. At this point, you just keep going. Yeah, they parked another pushing it. What happened?

[John]

I don't know.

[Brett]

They ran out of gas.

[Brady]

Right when it hit that hippie, it ceased to work.

[Brett]

My battery's out. Charge.

[Brady]

The charge is out now. You couldn't put it neutral and just let it roll.

[Brett]

Another thing.

[Brady]

Oh, no.

[John]

Maybe I wonder if somebody forgot to put their parking brake on or something.

[Brady]

And it just lit the hippie, and now it's trapped the hippie under the. Under the wheels. Now it's like seven to 10 people trying to push the car off the hippie who's laying on the road under the car. And it's just. It's just working as one of those tire wedges on a steep driveway. Wow. Oh, my God. Wow.

[John]

Just. I don't know if, like, she had a seizure or something, just passed out.

[Brady]

Or what, but that's absurd. And, yeah, she just kind of stopped being a human being. Like, she's walking along and then rolled right over. Stopped being alive for a second for no reason. And then the car ran her down. That doesn't make any sense.

[Brett]

One the other day where the person backed over him. What are you doing? And they went forward again.

[Brady]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Brett]

So I could get some phones rolling in my ride. Chilling all alone.

[Brady]

Just hit the east side of the LBC on a mission. See, this is where Nate gets really smooth. He's going to save his friend, but he also sees some horror. So he has to stop turning his horse. But then he sees his friend's about to get murdered, so he goes in murders form. What a song. What a story. Cinematic. Nobody tells stories like that in songs. Bros Before Hoes, Bob Dylan, Harry Chapin. All the great storytellers. Nothing close to Warren G and Nate Dog. A Little help from Michael McDonald. Doesn't get much better than that. Name another hit song where multiple people are murdered, and in the end, you're in a hotel having sex with hookers. Like, name one more. It's the only one before, before, during, and after. Nobody's ever written one since. Even in rap, we. And it's a love song. We killed a hundred people. And then we found these girls and we took them to a hotel.

[John]

And the thing is, it's so smooth, you don't even realize it unless you really listen to lyrics.

[Brady]

So many crimes committed. Illegal gambling.

[Brett]

They don't kill anybody in back to the hotel.

[John]

No, I don't think so.

[Brady]

No. But they're prostitutes. Illegal. Illegal gambling, theft, murder, prostitution. There's a RICO case. The whole song's a RICO case. I could convict everyone in here, including Michael McDonald, just for being adjacent to it. What a sign it is Super Bowl Monday. And of course, everybody's blabbing about the terrible game, but the real winners and losers were the ones that spent $8 million for 30 seconds of airtime. And Louis Moses comes in every year and breaks her on down for us from a perspective of a man who used to do this for a living. In fact, won awards for it with his super bowl ads years ago. So Louis comes in and gives us his assessment of what happened in last night's super bowl. So you guys can sit and talk with some knowledge beyond just. I like this one. I didn't like that one. There's some real stuff in there. We'll talk to Louie next. There goes your Brady Report. It's out of control now.