← Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
02-10-26 - CONDENSED SHORT SHOW - TUESDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD
00:51:51
Loading summary
Transcript1 lines
- [00:00]
A
You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. So, yeah, the Olympics, it's kind of hard to watch them. Except for that Eileen Goo. Oh, man. Chinese snowboard superstar. No, ski skis is a freestyle skier. They do all sorts of jumps. But she's from America. I think her mom or whatever's Chinese, and she's a model on top of it all. Eileen Gu. Man, oh, man, Goo is the right thing. She's gorgeous. I just got to know when the, you know, lineup, like, when things are happening. Yeah, I don't care. I just. I turn it on and let the. I like, when can we catch Eileen Goo? I guess she was on last night. You just got. It's crapshoot. Yeah, it's what I. With the Olympics. As I was growing up, I didn't have the a la carte Olympics. You turned on the TV and Jim McKay would say, now we're going to go watch people jump. And like, okay, and whatever they sent you to, you did. Now it's like, you want to go to Peacock, you got to pay for that. You know that. Oh, you get a free subscription if you sign up for this. That. I'm like, wait a minute. What? Just turn it to channel 12. And what do you got? Now jump back and forth and, you know, you go to curling. And then Eileen Goofy. Eileen Goo is smoking hot, like so. And in her, like, little snowboarding thing, just her eyes show. Oh, she's like a Disney tail. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like a Disney princess. She's got those. They're not like, she's not. I don't know. This sounds bad. She's not like American looking, but she's also not full out Chinese. You know, pull her up, right? Face of PI. You know, she's not. It's a. You know what I'm talking about. You guys get it? Oh, yeah. You know what I'm saying? When you look over, you're like, oh, look at that Chinese person. And Brett, you loved it last night. All they kept doing is going, talking about her, the slope and stuff that she had to go down. That's why I don't watch it. Yeah. Oh, my God, I get in trouble. Eileen Goo. And she. She. She wrestles for China, but she's from San Francisco. She goes to Stanford. She's full out American. The. This lady is stunning. And I mean, like, in all sorts of Holy crap. Girl next door plus model ways. And she's beautiful. She's out there skating around. And her skis. She got a medal. She got a silver. She fell down twice. She had a great first run. And then there's some girl from Switzerland or something that was. Had a body on her, but her head was goofy. Yeah. Eileen Goo. And then Eileen goo's like, oh, my God, I had such a day. The gondola ride to the top of the mountain was an hour. So I studied for my stuff at Stanford and then I went and I did my Olympic practices and then I shot for the COVID of Vogue. And I'm like, oh, man, she's. She's lived more in that day than I have my whole life. She has her vagina journal. No, she's got journals. She handwrites journals. The process. Yeah, she's. Man, it's hard not to watch her, though. She's getting that little ski outfit and stuff and foreign. She's very pretty. The goo's a superstar. I don't like her. She's an American and she's. She's skiing for China. Why? And she does. She's got this thing for. For China, but I'd root for her to win a gold medal. And was she born there or here? I don't know. Her parents or something about. Her mom and dad were Chinese, but they moved over to San Francisco, which I guess you keep. But I mean, every picture of her is in America. Like, she's. She's loving the life of America, but if China produced more of that, I'd be a communist tomorrow. So she's a snow skier? Yeah, she does all sorts of tricks. No, like skis, but she does like, amazing stuff that you can't even like. She skis backwards at 100 miles an hour and then does jumps. Her event is freestyle. I don't know what you call it. Is it freestyle? It is crazy. So she did good on the slopes. Stop. Yes. What? Come on. I knew I couldn't talk to you about this like an adult. Don't trip. Giggle on it. Yeah, Yeah. I couldn't believe what I was looking at last night. And. And then she gets tall. She is. And then she gives you that side eye when she, she, she. She had the Swiss girl did a great run. Like, she was fantastic. They. They're like doing like six flips. They're hitting these ramps and like doing six or seven flips in the air. I mean, you think that ski jump thing is neat? You know, when people just go straight down and then go and fly for a while and then land for distance. These. These chicks were. Oh, yeah. They were going six, seven spins and flips on one jump, landing backwards and then hitting the next ramp backwards. And I'm like, well, cancel the ski jump, because that's the dumbest thing I've ever seen compared to this. You see the. Look at her. The one dude did a 2340. I don't even know what that means. Brady, that's. How many 360s. It was like seven 360s or something like that. Maybe that's why she's Chinese. She can do that kind of Math. I can't. 2340. I don't know. And then you got to grab a skier. It doesn't count. You gotta. Oof. But the girl that went before her ran up like a ridiculous. Look at this. Like, the way they do. This is it. And that's little stuff. They start off. That's not a big slope, and then. Yeah, they land on, like, rails and. And handrails and then get back on the slopes. But she is. She's special. She's kind of my Chinese dua lipa. You know, if she came over and said, you know, xing jing ping ping ping has a lot of good ideas, I'd be like, yeah, I think so too. I'm all in on that whole communism thing. Yeah, I would definitely simp for that. Will you go get me a donut? Yes. Ah, the closest donut place is 150 miles away. Okay. I'll be back. I'll walk. I'll be back tomorrow. No problem with your donut. Because I love you, I think. Whoops. Was that out loud? I'll be back. Yeah. She is tall. She's tall. Leggy, supermodel, 22. It's bad. It's. You know, it's perverted. But, man, she's got. Got something. All these Chinese athletes wandering around going, oh, holy crap. Like they love we going on team. Holy crap. I think I heard that last night a lot. She and our team. Holy crap. You might go. Stanford. All of the Chinese team goes to Stanford. That's what the Chinese say to her all the time. Herogo, man. Yeah, I can't get enough of it. Look. Asian. That's the. She doesn't. I mean, like, literally. I think I made that. I know. If you'd have told me that she was skiing for them, I'd be. No, them. Yeah, the other team. Those people. You'd have told me she's a filthy communist. Slapped you right in the mouth. Exactly. She's everything Kid Rock was singing for the other night. Turns out. Yeah, I would go full on Marxism. Like, whatever. Like, I would. I'd tape my eyes down, see for what. Giving me static about that. I'd take my eyes down. I don't call them them. I want to be one. You're fighting everything in their existence. I'm trying to join the tribe. Nope, not at all. I would look like Buddha. I would have my. My bald head, my eyes taped back and sitting there going, irene goo. I would do the thing. Nobody would be mad we moved to Toronto just because it's fun to say. Visit Homeburg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com hey, it's Brett Vesely, and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that? Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into M and P Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wrong hands. Okay, but what if he lives out of state? Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it all online. It's really that simple. There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms. Holmberg's morning sickness. Yeah, dude, trust me on this one, Eileen Goo is relevant. I don't want to watch hot chicks. He's like that guy I saw on the news last night that actually felt bad for. He's from Chandler and he's on national news. They said an Arizona man has broken a record. And I'm like, oh, hey, I'm interested. And then it was for his Stranger Things collection. He's got 2000. He's got 2301 items. And I'm like, oh, God, let him be Tucson. Come on. Nope, Chandler. Like, he's one of us. His name is Joey Avalos, and he was on the news last night. I thought to myself, joey, Joey Avalos has 2,301 Stranger Things items. And he's the record holder by, I'm guessing, 2,300. Because who else is collecting that? And to Joey, I say, hey, love what you love, right? Collect what you collect. But when the news calls and you're like, oh, boy, you have basically just checked your dick out of the game from normal broads. You are now. He was ready to commit. Nope. It's sad. Let's go ahead. Let's announce it. Yeah. He's like, you know what? Here's what I also want to be for the rest of my life. Celibate. I'm going to go for this. He's got his own strange. It's not even like a great show. It's good, but it's not a collect. Like, you can have a few things. Here's what you need to do if you're a friend of Joey's, is just go, hey, this is neat, man. Let's keep this, I don't know, in a storage shed or garage or basement or. Well, let's not go crazy wasting a whole room of your house, which will. It's a red flag to every normal girl if you showed a girl that you just met around your house, like, oh, this is the living room. I just got all the furniture. It's nice, I think. And then here's the dining room, and it's have dining in a kitchen. Let's go into my special I'm going to kill you room, which is just nothing but Stranger Things memorabilia. Oh, okay, Vecna, I'm leaving. And then you're just going to. She's gone. So I should stop my Landman collection right now, right? If you. Look, let me tell you right now, if you've got 10 items or more of Landman, you own the record. Calm down. 2300 is way overkill on this. What do you think the last time he got laid was? Oh, season one. That's right. It's been a minute. And then he said, you know what? My guess is he's tied some sort of special relationship with a girl. Two stranger things. And it was probably 10 years ago when the thing started where he's like, she likes it, too. So we wanted to impress her. And then he got weird about it, she bails, and he's like, well, that's the type of gal I like. You can't. We have our own John Gordon here who has a full room at his house of Star wars collectibles, Right? Yeah. Like, he dedicated a guest room. It's creepy. Didn't he start that as a kid, though? Or. Yes. Doesn't matter. Yeah. Thank you, Brad. He's continuing. What you need to do is what Ronnie made you or you made it to what, 37, 38. Before you got married. It was those beer cans. That was the. They walked in the house. Well, they didn't come over here. They were up in the attic. Yeah. All right. Because everybody. Because you had friends brought them out. And then it slowed some stuff down. Slowed some things down. That back home is like, no girls. You go, you have a house filled with collectible anything. Chicks are either gonna show up and go, I like him so much that I'm gonna ruin this. What Ronnie did. We're not putting these anywhere in the house. You can have us. And she was right. You can't do it. You can have. You have to build on a room for it. And then one room even still. That's been in the garage for years. Yeah. And that's where they belong. In the garage. Or a trash can or garbage was opened. Old cans of beer. And you keep the good ones and you sell them and you try to make some money and you just. Not for display purposes. 2301 Stranger Things items is. Is overkill. You're way ahead. Stop. This is vecna from season three. He was going after 11 in this particular. Oh, wow. So can you still get a hard on or were you, like, cursed with some sort of weird early onset impotence? This room to Stranger Things. You're never getting laid with this. And what is gonna try and you is disturbingly bad. I'm just looking for a gal who's into it, like me. Oh, you guys are gonna have the weirdest kids. Like, damn, I want to be a friend to you. Congratulations. I really like your collection. Hide it from public. Don't let the news film you. It's awful. You might as well go on the news going, this guy's got more herpes than anyone in the world. I got 2,301 bumps. I'm a world record holder for herpes. Like, hey, guess who's never gonna try to touch your dick? And then on the news, he's like, I used to collect a lot of Funko Pops. I'm like, do you hate your dick? Like your dick is. Your dick is filing for separation. We know a couple of those people. Rooms of Funko Pops. And. And what's. What's missing from their hands? Well, what's in there was in their hands. Usually their own nails. They keep their own. Yeah, their hands are in permanent kung fu grip. They're full. Yeah, they're not. Yeah, don't do that. Don't do that. You know what women never do? Like, I remember I. I knew a girl once who. I'm not interested in her at all. But I worked with her and we went to her house and she had started to turn her own Home into a salute to Disney. And it was. It was weird. Like she seemed normal. You go over to her house and her kitchen, all Disney. Then the hallway, no pictures of anything except Disney. And then a room that you just opened up and it's like, oh, she's insane. It was like, you know, even to the point where it was that princess, the, the one in New Orleans, the black princess one. And they're like, who's that? And she'd tell you the whole story, but I'm like, okay, we gots to go. She's got bodies in the basement. So to you. How'd she look, though? Not good. Chandler resident Joey Avalos. Guinness came by and gave you your award. Now scrap it, box it up, put the award on the wall, and then go about being a man again because I'm worried about you. And evidently you don't have any friends. I don't know. Do you even put that award on the wall? Yes. Like when you know some over and goes, oh, what'd you get that for? And then you tell her, no extent Sahara. That's nothing happening. Yeah, no, you're gonna see sand fall out of her like she's an hourglass. Yeah, she's gonna look like the beginning of Days of our Lives. So much dirt falling out of that thing. And what you'd have to do is get that Guinness plaque and then take it over to a friend who's good with computers and I'm guessing Joey is. And you change that world record holder into longest marathon sex with one person ever. Kind of. And then put that on the wall. I started collecting right after the show came out, but there wasn't a lot of merch. So I started collecting Funko Pops. Like, oh geez, I felt terrible for him. He was just announcing celibacy to the world. Brandon brings up a good point. Sounds. Sounds like you're talking about the 40 year old virgin. When they go into Steve Carell's statement. It was, it was a, it was a laugh line in there. And he had to go sell it all at ebay to get laid. Remember? What do you live in Neverland Ranch? Right? It's that. It's. It's yuck. Yeah, see, this guy's just bored. Brady hands me another one. Guinness gave a guy he folded 250 functional paper airplanes in an hour. At least it's only an hour of his day. And it's a bit of a skill. And then you just throw it all out. It's not like his house is a tribute to the world. Speed. Yeah. If it's like, I've got more paper airplanes in my whole home than anyone in the world, I'm like, I would assume that number's like six. Who's collecting paper airplanes? Xavier wants to know how much gay Steelers crap do you have? All right. Steelers are different. It's a live sporting event, and I built a whole room in the back, and it's a bar, and we get drunk. If he had a bar dedicated to Stranger Things and they reenacted it. What's worse, going and watching the Steelers play in a sports bar. They don't have, like a Stranger Things bar. People get. They have sports bars all over the place. One is okay. And I do have a lot of Steelers memorabilia. One is okay. Adds value to the home. People aren't going to come to my house and go, wow, this guy's. It's. It's. He's never going to have sex with anything in his life. Chicks actually dig the bar. Visit Homeburg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com Homeburg's Morning Sickness. So. And a lot of people. And then a lady asked, and I wrote it down because it's a long thing. She says, what do you mean? Our vagina is our currency. Look, if you, if you pretend like it's not real, you reveal yourself as a, as a Looney Tune. It is your currency. A woman, a man's currency is currency. We have to have money and stuff to be valuable. We can be great looking and poor, maybe get laid, but it's after fooling you into thinking that we've got stuff. I wouldn't know. I'm not great looking. But if you've got money as a man, you're gonna. You're gonna do okay. A woman doesn't have to have it. Here's my comparison. If I as a man. We'll start with Brett's comp. If Thriller was alive in 1983 with that limp and that walk, and he saw on TV that they were having auditions for zombies in a video for Michael Jackson and he didn't go down there, we'd be like, what are you doing? You're armed for? This is exactly what you should be shooting at. This is you. It's you. We'd be upset. Have you ever met a seven foot dude who tells you he hates basketball? Takes you about four or five days to, like, stop hating him. How you're armed for it. I got a buddy, 6, 9, 6 10. He's, oh, he basketball. I'm like, well, you're a moron. You're a moron. And you know why he hates it? Because he never got good at it. It's his life's biggest failure. You were. You were gifted to at least put it out there, right? I even told him, even if you suck and you're a bench player, you're still gonna make the league minimums better than what you're doing now. What does he do? Construction? It was a mechanic. You might as well just put stars on Christmas trees. He's a bumble. If I had a pickaxe for a dick and a metal detector for a right arm and I told you I didn't like looking for gold, you'd think I was an idiot. Like, well, that's what your body. Your body gave you this gift. Yeah, I don't want to. I don't want to dig for gold. I've got a. I want to sew. I've got a pickaxe and a Edward Scissorhands made the most out of it. Ladies, stop acting like that's not something you can use as money. It is now. You don't abuse it. You're going to confuse it. It's going to go strawman again. I'm not saying that's all you've got, but I'm saying it's a weapon you have and don't act like you don't use it. Somebody sent me a picture of Eileen goo working at McDonald's. It's a McDonald's that men would visit regularly. The homeless girl that was on 52nd street in McDowell had dudes driving around in circles for her. Has there ever been a hot first couple of weeks? She was rushing it and we weren't giving her money and hoping she got back on her feet. Dudes were giving her money hoping she'd get in a car. I'm gonna save this little angel. When's the last time a group of good looking women went to Postino's, got into the Range Rover and drove down the road and saw a good looking homeless man and said oh my God. And then circled him and then went back days later with new friends? That's what dudes do. That's the power of it. You act like you don't have it. What do you mean? Curr. Currency. Stop it. You know what I mean. Currency. Come on. And this guy says, the Stranger Things collection is the only thing acceptable to do any remaking of Stranger Things as if it's porn related. Otherwise you're a homosexual. I agree with that guy completely. We don't have this. Not currency. Is that all we are to you? No, but if we had that weapon, we'd use it. You don't have to do anything if you keep it. Good. Now, if you have a studio apartment decorated with nothing but WWE stuff, you're gonna need some money. Nobody's paying for you. It's a tough sell. We will love a poor person. Men are just better that way. We will love a poor person if she's good looking, good looking and poor. We'll take that. A woman won't. Well, he's taken for a night or two. A woman doesn't outwardly love a poor. She might end up with a poor person she doesn't like. Seek out a poor guy. See, musicians are still hope out there. Exactly. You can get off again. The old joke. What do you call a drummer whose girlfriend just left him homeless? Yeah. And that's. Those are girls that are smart. They get on the ones that are like, this guy's got potential. He's poor now, so you might end up with a poor guy. But stop acting like you don't have that current. It's disrespectful. The game, you know, it's like saying, we don't play baseball with bats. You do. We know the equipment. We understand it. But don't act like it's not a thing, lady. Her name was Sarah. Don't email me that. Sarah. I would never use it as currency. Okay? Not saying you have to. I'm saying you have it. That's what you are as a vagina Jew. You're real. You're real stingy with it. That's a band. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. But here's what Brady and I were talking about yesterday. Here's what you're not paying attention to. They're plotting a plan to kill Prince Andrew. That dude's got to go, so don't be surprised. Like, I thought he was gone for a while, but it's. I want to start predicting the conspiracies before they happen. You know, I want to have those moments where, you know. Alex. Alex Jones. Where is it? There it is. I'll eat your ass. Alex Jones pops up before. We're like the. We're like the Nostradamus of conspiracies. They are. They are. There will be an accident. They can't run him over again because then. Then it's the dead giveaway that they did it to Princess Diana. But he's gonna fall off a cliff or out a window. Something weird's gonna happen. Heart attack. It could be too natural. And then. Because then you gotta poison him and stuff. And that'll get caught. Like, you need an accident to happen. Like a weird. Like. Like he. Like a, you know, plane, maybe. Could be a plane crash. That would be big. Like. But he is. He's got in that Epstein file again. And he's laying on top of a chick in the pictures. And this dude's been denying that. Remember the first one when he had the arm around the girl? It turned out she was like 15. And he's like, well, that's just an angle. Look. If you ask me, that's a perception of the photograph. She's far away from me, but in the photograph it just looks as though I'm embracing her. I was never in that. And then the new ones come out and he's literally on top of a girl I don't even know. That could be the angle again. Camera angle. So it's two dimensional. This could very well be a reflection off a mirror. I remember once skydiving in that very position. And there was a. But the reflection of the. They're going to kill me, aren't they? They have to get rid of this dude. He's nothing but trouble for the. So he's the one. So you asked me about Princess Diana. Yes. I mean, there's no question that they were. They were going through some stuff with Diana. And that was a very elaborate way to unload her, by the way. Just out of the blue, the. I mean, that moon thing is just. Huh. More traction. The moon conspiracy. The landing. Oh, trust me, we'll get into that another time. Don't bring that up. We're in the middle of something else weird. Yeah, all right, well, calm down because we'll get into something else. Jesus, talk about the diversion police. Yeah, but I was one. Yes, I know what you were, Andrew. There. No, no. Well, nobody cares about credit. It's all right. We just got focus. I'm just saying the same thing. It's like. Yeah, no, I know you're not wrong. And he was laying on top of abroad. Now I have to talk about the moon. See what he did? Jesus Christ. You're not wrong, though. But on this moon thing, Brady sent over a video yesterday of Buzz Aldrin's moon boots. And then the moon print. Neil Armstrong, or Neil Armstrong, whoever it was. But it's the moon print of the preserved suit from the moon landing. And then the Boots don't match the print. That's the picture. And it's all. There's. That's all a mess. I'm pretty convinced now the moon didn't occur. I'm getting to that point now where it's almost like they're trying to send us stuff that makes us go just. Just know it didn't happen. So you think we've never been there. I'm just not. When we said that, we were getting mighty close to thinking it never happened. And I think they're doing that because these new guys are gonna shoot up there. Oh, here we go. Bright red John again. The new group that's got to go up there might blow up in the Van Allen belts and stuff like that. And they'll. And it'll be a dead giveaway that we've never done it. So I think they're just in case in us like start to question that first moon landing. Because I think we're actually going to try this time. And if it doesn't go well, then we'll know the first one was fake. So let's just make the first one fake now so when the other one blows up, we'll get back. Yeah. Don't get me off on the. Princess Diana's thing was the most elaborate murder of all time. That is a. Because you're taking chances. She lives. But that was unbelievable how they. They just mangled that car up. That thing is. It was like made of a tin can. Prince Andrew's gotta go. The royal family good at killing people. They're the Clintons of England and they just haven't come up with a way to get away with it yet. But that guy's. They've kind of banished him from the kingdom. He keeps coming up and you know, look, the first time was like, they're just not allowed to be here anymore. Get out. And if anything else comes out, you're in big trouble. And then this new one, all this new stuff's coming out when he's like, he's bad. The guy was banging a lot of chicks at Epstein Island a lot. He had nothing else to do, didn't have a job. He's Prince Andrew. Just go out. What do you do as a prince? Nothing. Right. Ribbons. And you speak out against landmines. It's an easy job. I just don't think you're third or fourth in line. Landmines are bad. I believe we should eliminate landmines. Thank you. Oh, he's brilliant. I'm against children's illiteracy. Oh, wow. What a brave branch to go out on there. Wow. Now all those people that are for that. I fight for children to be able to read. Stopped by a couple of hospitals. Yeah. The opening of a Safeway. Yeah. They had to keep away from the children's hospitals, though, because they'd mount them. No. He owe it to the juvie. Yeah. I now declare this Safeway open for business. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thy Safeway. There he goes. Fourth in line for the throne. Prince Andrew opening up the Safeway here in Liverpool. P P en thump. The Queen's like, we have a high school that. I'll take that, Mum. I'll do that one, Mom. There's a high school graduation, Andrew. Yes. And all of you can read, which is my literacy program. Have a lovely. I'll shake hands with each of you. I shall sponsor prom. And it's like, don't have anything to do this weekend. Mummy. Why don't you go to your friend's island again? Don't get photographed. Right o. I'll lay on top of these kids. It'll be funny. They gotta kill this dude and they know it. I'm not saying anything from what I expect. I just know they're gonna kill him and they're gonna. It's gonna be one of the. Oh, my. Prince Andrew's fallen from a second floor, hasn't he? He's always clumsy. He's such a clumsy prince. It is our great regret that we have lost my brother, Prince Andrew to a tumble from a window at Castle Windsor. Oh, what happened? He was so close to the window and took a misstep and out he went. Paramedics did all they could. Radio fell in the bathtub. Sadly, he also fell on one of Mum's corgis. So we've lost two beloved members of the family today. That corgi knew too much. Anyway, they're killing that guy. So prepare yourself for that next conspiracy, because that's a good one. And the royal family will, of course, get away with it, but it can't be as clumsy as the Princess Diana thing. So you ask Glenn. What do I think of the Princess Diana thing? Most elaborate murder in my lifetime. I mean, that is a. What a plan. Then get the car up to breakneck speeds and smash it into the side of the tunnel. Please. Her side first. What if the other people in the car die, love? Well, then so be it. So long as that goes away. Prince Andrew's laying on top of a child. We'll get to that in another day, right? Now we're focused on killing my former daughter in law. Well, your Dave Nashes are coming out. Wait until you find out why Michael Jackson was murdered. There's a guy in jail for it. So it wasn't that he wasn't murdered. I don't think Michael was too against his murder. I think he was really enjoying the pills and the propofol. And he's a big one. Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised they killed him too. You think Michael was going to spill the beans? Maybe diddled the wrong kid or something? Yeah, but wouldn't that kid. Wouldn't they kill the kid you're talking about? Probably the parents. Probably. Oh yeah. Pulled together and said they pulled somebody with the doctor. Why don't you load him up? He's gonna get away with this again, so let's just. Hi guys. What's going on? My new doctor. I just really want to be asleep for a little while. Do you have anything? Now's my chance. Sure, Michael, I got tons of stuff for him. Just load me up. Is Prince here? Yeah, he's outside. He's singing songs in the studio. He's. He, he. Is Danny awake yet? What's going on in there? By the way? It's Prince, not Michael. I'm the spitting image of my father. Biological father. I call him bio pops. Debbie. Prince, come on in here. Your daddy's sleepy. Daddy, why are you always so tired? Oh Prince, you were just a chip off the old block. Should I try some sleepy juice too, daddy? Hey mud, you know me. Sleepy juice. No, Prince, stay away from the sleepy juice. I swished bottles last minute. Daddy, I have to talk to you about something. What is it? Oppression. It's hard to be a black man in America. I know. And you're gonna get called lots of things like cracker and whitey. But why? He's David Johnson. I don't understand. Show daddy your new dance. Oh my God, you move like an angel. Anyway, Daddy. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. I got an email from a guy that said John, do you ever read these? And it's a. It's a sex advice column on some on Slate. And the answer to back was no. But it was a letter somebody wrote and you kind of pigs are you? Says we were house sitting for some friends who had been away on a vacation internationally. And I'm afraid we've created a mess for my friend Alex and his wife. My husband and I had sex the time we stayed At Alex and Amy's. The condom we used we threw in the trash in the bathroom of their bedroom. We didn't think anything of it. Right there. What a couple of pigs. Oh, yeah. It says, the trouble is Amy came home and spotted it when she was dumping the garbage several days after they came back. She and Alex don't use condoms, so now she thinks Alex is cheating on her. My husband and I came to the house and said, amy, we did that. We pigged out in your house and did that. She thinks we're trying to cover for him because we've been friends with Alex since college. Now Alex is living with us and Amy's contemplating divorce. Is there anything we can do, short of a lie detector test to prove his innocence? And then they signed it condom cluster F. First off, your friends trusted you to watch their home. You're adults. They don't go over there and bone. And if you do, the evidence is not left in their trash. Watch it. You flush it or you put it in a baggie and you take it to your house. You want it, you left. Believe anything, especially a used rubber. You have a used rubber and you're like, just put that in the trash. Amy will get to it. When she comes. And then you forget about it. You just left it there. That is disgusting. When I was. Oh, by the way in. Yeah, everything's good in the house. In the kitchen. Waste can fall, too. We didn't expect that either. I was dropping. I didn't run the sink, but I poured most of the contents into that. So if it looks like there's a lot of lotion dried up there, that's me. Now the question is, too, did they wash the sheets exactly. Or those pigs just leave it. They hogged out on their bed. Sheets are in the laundry room, and the dishes are dirty. You just. They're just pigs. Now, each of us in this room, save for Brady, has had sex in someone's house when they've watched it for them. There's no question about that. I, in fact, used to watch my best friend's mom's place when she'd go out of town. And she'd go out of town quite a bit. And that was when I had a girlfriend. And not only did I have sex in her bed, I never cleaned up after I was a teenage boy. You had entrusted to watch your home. What did you expect? Get what you pay for? Exactly. She had one of those motionless water beds. And the girl I was into was just thought that was the coolest thing in the World. So I gave her the goods on that a lot. Never once did I think we should peel these back. And they. Everything had to be just covered in evidence. And I told my friend's mom recently that I used to do that. And she said. And the conversation ended. Oh, I know. But she kept asking me to watch her house and her dogs, Buffy and Winnie. She would continually ask me to do that. It was a smoking deal. For it was. I got a free place to stay for a couple of days to hose my girlfriend and I. You're responsible enough look that no damage would happen to the house. Well, I mean, define. Define damage. Yes, define damage. Because there was definitely gross stuff leaving the house. Oh, I wouldn't steal. Lord, no. I was raised almost properly. We tried the guest room, you know, it had. Not the same. Oh, we gave it a good go. I mean, it was multiples in there. The couch, the kitchen. And then the girlfriend discovered the big, giant, like, waveless waterbed. And once she got on that, she's like, this thing's weird. And I'm like, yeah. And then I just saw the twinkle in her eye, and I just. We just hammered that duvet, and then we slept in it. Like, we stayed in that bed because it was the most comfortable one. And then it just became habit. But then you're sleeping in somebody else's. And that I never thought of at the time because my brain was so focused on one. Yeah, you're 17 years old. I didn't care. Yeah, it didn't matter. Could have been a sleeping bed. It could have been an alley. It didn't matter. I was gonna do this. This was a girl that was willing to let me lay on her. I was going to take advantage of that for as long as it lasted. It lasted a couple years. But you can be a pig adults. When you trust Brett to come to my house and I come home and there's rubbers in the. Brett might lose his job. I might actually come to go like Brett. That's enough. We can't even be deserve to. And you would? Yes, absolutely. I visit Homeburg's morning sickness online at 98kupd.comberg's Morning Morning Sickness. Larry and I have taken. You know what you can do now. I forgot the app, but we were yesterday. Larry's like, you know this. He. I forget it. But we had. God damn it. What's the name of that app? You can take songs that you like and load them in, right? What's it called? What's the app we were playing With Suno. And you take a song that you know, like if you want to take Atomic Punk. Yeah. And you just load it in there and it'll do it. I took. Listen to this. Oh, you can't. Oh, it has to be your own. So we took my. My band when we wrote One More Lie and had just said, what would you do with this? It redid it and it's. Listen to this. It's awesome. It's so clean. And it added a new beginning. The words, it doesn't get them all right, but it's got like. It's a different. So. And at the end it did a full cross up of the. That's awesome. But it cleans everything up. It took any production mistakes out as far as like cloudiness or compression. And it made me sound clean. I think it sounds great. About that. And that was just putting it in there saying, hey, AI, would you reproduce this for us? Four minutes later it had two copies. We have two different ones. And the end of it is outstanding, like stuff. I sent it to Marty, who's in the thing, and I'm like, listen to this. And he goes, I gotta tell you, first off, the ones and zeros are coming to kill us. And he said, but the end of that was such a creative way to bring back the first verse into the chorus. And they overlap and it like, we're like, yeah, we missed that now. Could they turn that into a 70s funk? Probably, yeah. All we did was just like plug it in or whatever genre. Because the production we had for it was a little cloudy. It wasn't perfect. This cleaned it like it's. It's ready now. It was so cool. And the other one is. I don't know. I remember the other one had more of a seven dust pod. I told Toledo, put him in there. It's so weird. And you know what's the funny part? Both versions cut out the first lines and just went right to the. To the chorus of the verse. No, there's a whole thing. Get on your knees of. Those bones. And is this what this is more of a chunky guitar version. It's so neat. And if you've got music of your own and you throw it into. Larry did one where he did a. He did a song that a girl sang for him. And what was the name of yours? Your song. It turned into this techno awesome club. It was amazing. The interesting part is I wonder how much of Plato this last year came from. Good. Embrace it. Next year you're going to be better. Embrace it. Visit Holmberg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. Weird. We'll get into the thing with. Let's do it right now. How about this? You asked for it. We gave it to you. The Piss Ball Pete song, which was a smash hit. 19 second song for 17. Oh, wow. It was even shorter than I thought. 17 second song for a Palladio this year. Sounded a little something like this and became an instant classic. Me tell you a story A man named Piss Ball Pete his dick so smiley pissed on his ball. All right, so that was the original version. Right. So the first thing I did with Suno is I just put the song in and it extended it. That instrumental version. The third one there. Yeah. This is the first thing it. It spit back. It was in a little extended version. It came back. Just an instrumental. Yep. So Suno, we said, plug it in, do what you want with this. And AI brought back Piss Ball Pete. Hey, The guitar is doing the. I like it. All right. It's like a theme song to King of the Hill. Now then the. The other version. It did. The second one is version one there. The. The first one left. Okay. And this is. I didn't tell it to do anything else. Just said, go crazy with this, Suno. AI did this to the piss ball pizza. I want it to be so fast. It gets to the lyrics a little bit later. It's like Bad Bunny. I like it, but I don't know what he's saying. Right. I feel like I must have drop kick Murphy's or something. It's clever. All right, the middle version there, I typed out the lyrics, which. Which are two sentences, and I said, be creative along these same lines. Okay. Let me spin the tail of Pistol Pete whose trousers always cling to his feet With a bladder so full and a tricky feet his aim was off and his pride too neat People would love a D In the blue light with gleaming shoes and spirits bright but when Colorado games are came to great if I just do so don't want to. This is ridiculous. 10 minutes. A legend in town Though not by intent this ball Pete's aim was slightly bent A curious case with no retreat forever A trench from head to the feet. Get out of here. That all from this? Hold on. That's all from me. Tell your story. A madman dick so small he pissed on his and it made a whole thing about his twisty feet. Visit Homburg's morning sickness online at 98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. All right, you call, you get ready or Willie. All right, ready. There's the pistol. Is it on the same page as the Pistol Pete's ones? Yeah, it's at the bottom. Oh, I read. All right, yeah. Oh, my God. The first two are what you like it. It translated what you said or what it thought you said. The third one is a totally new creation based on what it thinks your lyrics were. Okay, so earlier this morning, we were making fun of the fact that the Van Halen One came out 48 years ago, which is 1978. Right. Which is a great rock album that no one denies is in the top five of all time rock albums. It's incredible. Then I always do the. Well, 48 years have passed and we still look at this in great reverence in 1978. 48 years earlier was 1930. Is there anything from 1930 that was relevant in 1978 musically? And the answer was no, because it was all that, you know. You know. Do you have the original version? So anyway, I was making fun of, like, the way it sounded on the streets, and I forgot a penguin often. There's no blacks, no blacks, no blacks, no blacks. It was just a throwback to the time when they were like, you know, we're all broke from the stock market, but at least there's no blacks. There's no blacks. Everything was racist and awful. And that's her grandparents. So I told Toledo, put that in the AI and see if it'll make. Oh, I'm taking my headphones off because I'm gonna get fired. I'm gonna get fired. No. Which one should I first? First one on the left. Left to right? Yeah, left to right. This is what AI did to my improv. No blacks. 1930s smash hit called Turn My Mic Off. Penguins and no blacks. All right, here we go. No, no. Is it using my voice? No. Oh, okay. Let's see what the penguin says. We'll be dancing. But no blacks, no blacks, no blacks. I've got to go outside right now in the sunshine and find a B. But no black, no black, no blacks. It's been spring in Germany and nothing can go wrong. Keep a spinner theme and flow. The first time I tried to give it prompts and I missed that one and kept it in there. Oh, my God. I mean, this feels like Mel Brooks. I know. Oh, my gosh. It did it exactly the same. It just. It goes back to the chorus, I'm guessing. I don't know if it does yet or not. It was just a nervous instrumental and we're having a tap dance right there, ironically. Fifteen seconds. And I like that. I'm waiting for. Yeah, no, it's going to have that. All right. And then I did another one for 30 seconds, right? Yeah. And then the middle. Now, the middle one is the second try. At. At. At it. The middle one is the second try. All right. So this is what it did next. Oh, my. Let's see what the penguin says. We'll be dancing but no blacks no black, no blacks I gotta go outside right now in the sunshine and find a bathroom. But no black, no blacks, no blacks it's been spring in Germany and nothing can go wrong Keep a similar theme and flow insane Keep a similar scene all right? And then the last one is just its own creation. Its own creation of what I was talking about or what it thinks. I don't remember saying the words. That was thinking about a penguin. And then I got to find a bath. It's just things. I think people in the 30s would. Is that a penguin? Where's the bathroom? They didn't have bathrooms back then. Here we go. This is the third one. I love this. So it might not be as great. Let's see what the penguin says. Tipping has had our way Sidewalk shine on a Saturday we're all ready to play Bow tie, crooked shoes all righty. Shuffling down the lane says Kid, you bring your best Tonight we're gonna shake this town again how are the penguins? Says we're gonna follow that fool all night and he says jump, we jump he says swing, we swing just right Spin that room till the walls turn blue Laugh so hard we lose our blues we'll be dancing till the break of day Doing just what the penguins said what did I say? Cherry popping down here. Did I say something about what penguin? I just sang it. Oh, I got the penguins. I guess I said penguins. Sounds kind of like the Penguins. Let's go back to the original. The best one by far. I'm gonna play it again. I'm sorry. Here's your hot releases for today. Unless you got something frozen, nothing will top this. Let's see what the penguin says. We'll be dancing but no blacks, no blacks, no blacks I've gotta go outside right now in the sunshine and find a bathroom. But no blacks, no blacks, no blacks it's been spring in Germany and nothing can go wrong Keep a spinner theme and flow. Then it just closes out with that. I like that. Okay. That's. That's spectacular. Thank you. That's the hot release for this week. That's all you need. Catchy tune. Thanks, Momoney palm. God damn it. This podcast is gold, Jerry. Visit Homeburg's morning sickness online@98kupd.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. I got emails from people going, I got out of my car. Everything seemed normal. I got into my car and there's penguins and no blacks. No. What the hell was that? Well, if you weren't listening and a guy said, I hate this podcast live because I can't rewind it. I know. Well, you're. You're listening to the recording of the podcast. This is. You're the live studio audience of the later on distributed podcast. I see it. And so that's what I mean, you know, Know you're going to see all the flaws, you're going to see the bloopers, and then, you know, you got to come back. You can't rewind the live podcast, but later you can listen. But for those of you who didn't know what was going on earlier this morning, we improvised a 1930s hit. And I think it sounded a little something like this. No blacks, no blacks, no blacks. I'm going to go outside back now in the sunshine, Neb. No blacks, no blacks, no blacks, no blacks, black. It's springtime in Germany and nothing can go wrong Germany is my favorite place no blacks, no black, no black. Yes. See that? We're joking around about what songs in the 30s sound like that led into the AI version of that song, which magically created it and is a smash hit. People want me to send it to them, and the answer is no. And he goes, and thanks a lot. I've just walked down the hallway at my work going, no blacks, no blacks, no blacks. Do it in your 30s voice. Just confuse everyone at work. If you can get a little tiny megaphone, 1930s guy is a blast. Become him. It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee. I have heard enough of this.