02-11-25 - Remembering The Win You Feel When An Ex Ends Up Doing Worse After You - Dominoes To Make A Pepperoni Perfume - Emailer Seeks To Make Amends w/John After Trying To Take Him Down Last Year Over Gilbert Goons Comments

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Episode Summary (02-11-25)

Episode Title:
"Remembering The Win You Feel When An Ex Ends Up Doing Worse After You - Dominoes To Make A Pepperoni Perfume - Emailer Seeks To Make Amends w/John After Trying To Take Him Down Last Year Over Gilbert Goons Comments"
Release Date: February 11, 2025
Host/Authors: Brett, Brady Bogen, Rich, and Dick Toledo
Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD

---

1. Triumphs in Breakups: The "Win" Feeling

The episode opens with Brett sharing his perspective on breakups, emphasizing the satisfaction of seeing an ex-partner struggle post-separation.

• Brett ([00:58]):
  "I feel like a real winner because this person's life went right into the crapper after he started messing around with me."

• Discussion Highlights:

  • Brett recounts how his ex-wife moved into an $85,000 condo in Tucson alone, which he perceives as her downfall post-breakup.
  • Rich and Brady join the conversation, sharing their own experiences of feeling victorious after ending relationships where their exes didn't fare well subsequently.
  • The hosts humorously debate the reasons behind their exes' misfortunes, often mocking the circumstances that led to their perceived victories.

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brady ([02:06]): "They're all wins to me."
  • Brett ([05:15]): "Have you ever actually won one? Yeah, I'd say because I've lost one."

2. The Curious Case of Domino's Pepperoni Perfume

Transitioning from personal tales, the hosts delve into a quirky topic: Domino's introduction of a pepperoni-scented perfume.

• Brett ([25:43]):
  "Domino's is now doing something... this year they're launching pepperoni perfume. America has spoken."

• Discussion Highlights:

  • The hosts mock the absurdity of a food chain venturing into the fragrance industry, imagining humorous scenarios where women would use the scent to attract men.
  • Brady expresses disappointment that such an unconventional product exists only in the UK, adding to the comedic narrative.

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brett ([26:37]): "A woman that smells like a sausage. There's nothing better, nothing quite as good."

3. Apology from an Emailer: Mocking Redemption

A significant portion of the episode revolves around an email Brett received from a listener attempting to apologize for previous derogatory remarks made against him.

• Email Excerpt Read by Brett ([30:31]):
  "I realized I was fairly reactionary and maybe doing and saying things I should not have... I am emailing to apologize..."

• Hosts' Reactions:

  • The team ridicules the emailer's sincerity, labeling him as "poor man's Howard Stern" and questioning his motives.
  • Brett and Rich engage in a back-and-forth mocking dialogue, expressing disbelief and amusement over the emailer's failed attempt at reconciliation.
  • They discuss the emailer's past attempts to harm their reputations and businesses, portraying him as a perpetually antagonistic figure struggling with alcoholism.

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brett ([32:59]): "I just looked at the sender of that email. What a drunk loser."
  • Rich ([43:25]): "I don't have anything to do with it."

4. Local News Snippets: Super Bowl and Philadelphia Chaos

The discussion shifts to current events, highlighting impressive Super Bowl viewership and unsettling incidents in Philadelphia.

• Super Bowl Discussion ([18:20]):

  • Brett: "It's the most viewed television event in history. That's incredible."
  • They compare the Super Bowl's viewership to historical milestones like the moon landing, emphasizing its cultural significance.

• Philadelphia Events ([19:02]):

  • The hosts describe chaotic behavior witnessed in Philadelphia, including vandalism and public disturbances.
  • Brett: "There was a gaggle of people pulling down street lights and laughing and having... kicking them out like they."

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brady ([19:48]): "Nothing but class."
  • Brett ([20:15]): "She was having sex with the bagel guy... it ruined my lunch."

5. Ongoing Personal Jabs and Community Narratives

Throughout the episode, the hosts continuously interject personal jabs, creating a lively and often confrontational atmosphere.

• Brett's Banter:

  • Consistently targets the emailer, referring to him with derogatory nicknames and lamenting his personal failures.
  • Brett ([23:00]): "She was already halved him. Yeah. And he still has the cave and..."
  • Mockingly celebrates others' misfortunes, such as ex-spouses' downward spirals.

• Rich and Dick's Contributions:

  • Rich: Shares anecdotal stories, often aligning with Brett's sentiments, adding depth to the themes of personal victories over exes.
  • Dick Toledo: Occasionally interjects with supporting jokes and adds to the mockery, enhancing the comedic tone.

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brett ([24:12]): "You are not even in close games... We're the champion."
  • Dick Toledo ([24:18]): "You don't have any mug shots."

6. Community and Listener Engagement

The hosts engage with listeners by reading emails and responding in real-time, fostering a sense of community interaction.

• Listener Emails and Comments:

  • Brett reads and reacts to listener-submitted content, including humorous and offbeat stories.
  • Listener Story ([15:09]): A humorous account of a mother wearing Depends, disrupting a family lunch.

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brett ([15:09]): "When your mom says that, she might as well lean in. Whisper in your ear, I don't have any panties on."

7. Promotional Segments and Advertisements

Although the initial instruction was to skip advertisements, the transcript includes promotional content interspersed within conversations.

• Promotion Example ([50:08]):
  • Brady: "Wake Up Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop..."
  • Details about local bike shops and grand openings are shared, blending seamlessly with the show's content.

8. Closing Remarks and Future Teasers

As the episode nears its end, the hosts wrap up ongoing debates and tease future segments, maintaining the show's dynamic and irreverent tone.

• Final Interactions ([54:33]):

  • Brett summarizes the day's discussions, reiterating their triumph over the adversarial emailer.
  • Brett: "You're a dick, you'll be treated like a dick."

• Notable Quotes:

  • Brett ([55:21]): "I want to celebrate. How would he celebrate?"
  • Brady ([57:20]): "What a day. Sorry."

---

Key Takeaways:

• Humorous Take on Personal Gains: The hosts explore the satisfying narrative of seeing an ex-partner falter post-breakup, blending personal anecdotes with humor.

• Satirical Commentary: Through topics like Domino's pepperoni perfume, the show satirizes corporate marketing strategies and societal norms.

• Mocking Redemption Attempts: The episode prominently features the hosts' ridicule of an emailer's failed attempt at making amends, highlighting the show's unapologetic and confrontational style.

• Community Interaction: Engaging with listeners through email readings and discussions fosters a participatory atmosphere, despite the often contentious dialogue.

• Local Relevance: By discussing local events and promotions, the show maintains a strong connection with its Arizona audience, ensuring content remains relevant and relatable.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Brett ([00:57]): "Old habits die hard."

• Brett ([05:15]): "Have you ever actually won one? Yeah, I'd say because I've lost one."

• Brett ([25:43]): "Domino's is now doing something... this year they're launching pepperoni perfume. America has spoken."

• Brett ([32:59]): "I just looked at the sender of that email. What a drunk loser."

• Brett ([55:21]): "I want to celebrate. How would he celebrate?"

• Brady ([19:48]): "Nothing but class."

• Rich ([43:25]): "I don't have anything to do with it."

---

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully intertwines personal storytelling with humorous commentary, creating an engaging and entertaining experience for its listeners. The hosts' candid discussions, combined with their sharp wit and interactive segments, ensure that both regular listeners and newcomers find value and amusement in their dynamic exchanges.

Transcript

[Dick Toledo]

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[Brett]

I think Katie and the Hobbs might be my favorite one. Might be. Might be. It's up there. Our wake up songs of the years gone by or our theme songs. I should say. Solid stuff. Thank you. Miles to nowhere. I don't even call them Katie and the Hobbs anymore. They've earned it.

[Brady]

Old habits die hard.

[Brett]

Old habits die hard. Bert, yesterday I get emails from people. I got a great one I'm about to read. I was just thumbing through my yesterday emails and about 6:08pm last night. You guys are gonna like this. I'll get to it in just a second. I feel like a real winner because this person's life went right into the crapper after he started messing around with me.

[Brady]

Oh.

[Brett]

You know like when you get a. You have a girlfriend and then you get. You break up and you win the breakup by like a few years later, you see that she's in a condo in Tucson living alone for 85 grand. She bought it last year. Housing price was through the moon. But she can. And that's a true story on my situation. It's like, well, should have been better to me, baby. You wouldn't be in that s hole down there. You weren't dragging me down. True story. By the way, do you have any wins and breakups?

[Brady]

They're all wins to me.

[Brett]

That's right. But have you, have you like won any of them? Like you all win for personal reasons. You win every. Sorry, Brett, every loser says that. Have you ever actually won one? Yeah, I'd say because I've lost one. I lost the divorce. I thought that was she went off and married some multi super millionaire. In fact, a friend of mine pointed out that when my ex wife bought a house with her husband, they announced it in the paper, what name buys the blank blank blank mansion estate. And I'm like, all right, well good on you. I'll Take the L on that. I did. It was a good fight. I put up a good fight. But she's. She won that. She got rid of me and clearly moved on to a better thing. Like she's visiting the world and. Yeah, she. She won that. And I'm fine with that. You're not going to win them all.

[Rich]

I have one of those kind.

[Brett]

You have one that took off on you and you're the. Yeah.

[Rich]

And it was a. Yeah. I mean, it. It looked like it was going that direction and it didn't.

[Brett]

What do you mean? Well, it's ambiguous, Brady. This is. This is time.

[Brady]

There we go.

[Brett]

Here we go. Go ahead.

[Rich]

No, I lost out.

[Brett]

Yeah, but what were you saying? What was going what direction?

[Rich]

Well, we didn't get married, but it was someone direction.

[Brett]

Oh, that direction. Yeah. Oh, that's the. That's what got me work. So you guys were heading down the path. Look like you're maybe going to get hitched.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Then you didn't.

[Rich]

Right.

[Brett]

Because this is new to me. I think. 25 years.

[Brady]

Every learning every day.

[Rich]

Too young. Too young.

[Brett]

That's why you decided not to get married? You didn't do that. You'd have gotten.

[Rich]

No, it was more, you know.

[Brett]

She broke up with you.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Yeah. She dumped you.

[Brady]

How old were you?

[Rich]

Probably, let's see. 30, 35.

[Brett]

That's too young that you were 35.

[Rich]

I wasn't.

[Brett]

She was probably a little older than you. How old were you?

[Rich]

Yeah, I mean, I was younger than that. I had to be just under 30, I guess.

[Brett]

So you're late 20s. She's in her mid-30s.

[Rich]

No, no, she was younger.

[Brett]

35.

[Rich]

What? Then I gotta remember the timeline was when I first.

[Brett]

Sounds like he's not over it.

[Rich]

Well, because I can't do the math that quick. 90, 95, 96.

[Brett]

Okay. 30 years ago.

[Rich]

30 years ago.

[Brett]

So you were. Put me 30.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brett]

And she was younger or older than you?

[Rich]

Younger.

[Brett]

Okay.

[Rich]

Probably 25, 24.

[Brett]

All right.

[Rich]

Everything was headless white.

[Brett]

And you look like you're gonna get married.

[Rich]

Yeah, I was pretty close. Took her to my brother's wedding, you know.

[Brett]

Yeah, that's your brother getting married. So then you guys. You're pretty close. You're living together.

[Rich]

No, I don't.

[Brett]

We don't know this story.

[Brady]

First one, me.

[Brett]

And then you see, brought it up. So I got asked the questions. You were. You lost this breakup.

[Rich]

There was. Yeah.

[Brett]

She dumps you.

[Rich]

Yeah. And there was a certain, you know.

[Brett]

And some could say crime involved was.

[Rich]

Fortunate because she definitely wanted A certain lifestyle, a certain level.

[Brett]

She was. She had expectations, she had goals. High bars. Did she have goals for you or for herself?

[Rich]

I was in it for a year and a half, maybe.

[Brett]

But what I'm saying is, like, is she like. Her goals were like, I'm gonna be wealthy and successful, and if you're not right next to me doing the same thing, you're out? Or was it, you're gonna be wealthy and successful, and I'm gonna coattail this and I won't accept anything else.

[Rich]

Say a combo of both.

[Brett]

So she wanted to coattail off of your success and also have a little bit.

[Rich]

Yeah, there's a level that you can.

[Brett]

Still not sure why you've gotten so quiet on this. You brought it up. How did she dump you? And why is it. Why did you lose? This is the point.

[Rich]

Well, I. I started.

[Brett]

Brent.

[Brady]

No, I lost.

[Brett]

Me neither. That's what I was asking.

[Rich]

A guy that made bagels.

[Brett]

What?

[Rich]

This guy had a company, A Jewish guy.

[Brett]

Oh. Oh, like a serious bagel.

[Brady]

You lost Einstein.

[Brett]

You lost one of the Einstein brothers?

[Rich]

No. No Brugers, no chompies down the line.

[Brett]

If you're gonna start in with the. I had one of those once. You're gonna get questions, and now you're pulling back. Share your life. It's 30 years ago.

[Rich]

She didn't end up with bagel boy. She ended up with another guy.

[Brett]

All right, who was bagel boy then?

[Rich]

And that guy has a bat cave.

[Brett]

Oh, that guy?

[Rich]

Yes.

[Brett]

The charity guy. Yes. That has the bat cave and the car.

[Rich]

Yes.

[Brett]

He bought the bat car. He's got the bat. I'd marry this guy.

[Rich]

Yeah, she made a good choice.

[Brady]

So you really didn't lose. I mean, you can't compete with that.

[Brett]

You just sh. Hand and go. You're better in every area.

[Rich]

Congratulations.

[Brett]

Who was the bagel guy? She dumped you for the bagel? She's already halved him. Yeah. And he still has the cave and.

[Rich]

Off over the rainbow bridge.

[Brett]

She's dead.

[Rich]

No, she's alive.

[Brett]

Oh, Jesus Christ. He killed her. Bread at the end.

[Brady]

I would, too, if she took my bat cave and my bat car.

[Brett]

That was a very Nora Ephron moment there. Everything was going well, and she's dead in the road. Who's the bagel guy? Why can't we. It's 30 years ago, and he dumped her.

[Rich]

I don't. I can't remember his name.

[Brett]

Did she leave you for the bagel man?

[Rich]

More or less.

[Brett]

Oh, so she. It wasn't a breakup.

[Brady]

She was just Stepping up every time.

[Brett]

Yeah. So you were together, you thought, things are great.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Next thing you know, the house smells a little like baked bread, and you're like, what's going on? And she's out.

[Rich]

Yeah. This guy went public.

[Brett]

They overlap.

[Rich]

It was a hawk to a. Like having a bitcoin. He went public, and it went through the roof. And then what was.

[Brett]

You don't remember the company?

[Rich]

Yeah, it was called Chompies. No, it was New York Bagels and Beyond or something.

[Brett]

Okay.

[Rich]

There is a New York. That's different company. There's two of them. One on Scottsdale. That's a different New York day.

[Brett]

So not only did you lose this breakup, like, the next day, she was in a better spot for sure. No kidding. So she was. It was an overlap. And she's like, it was you or him and bagel guys.

[Rich]

Well, we were, you know, we were going through that what's happening here? Kind of situation.

[Brett]

Right. Because she was having sex with the bagel guy. Asking the same questions. Wow. Well, thanks for sharing that. I had no idea. And then the bat cave guy. I've done work with that dude.

[Rich]

Yeah. He's a nice guy.

[Brett]

Wonderful man.

[Rich]

Yep.

[Brett]

I shook hands with him, and I'm like, I want to. His name's Chuck or something like that. Like Charles and Charles. Charles. Charles, that's right. I called him Chuck because we got so tight. I actually tried to blow him once. I wanted to ride. Right. He has a Batmobile. It's like, you got to be sick to ride in the Batmobile.

[Rich]

He might be on his yacht in San Diego right now. I don't know.

[Brett]

He's friends with Bruce.

[Rich]

Yep.

[Brett]

That's how I met him. Wayne St. James.

[Brady]

Oh, okay.

[Brett]

And half mine says Bruce trying to blow the guy. So can I get your boat? Well, I would. I would, too.

[Brady]

A Batcave. And the Batmobile.

[Brett]

The original Batmobile. I mean, they had a bunch of them. He's got one of them. And he takes Diane kids on rides through the Batcave. And then at the end, they get. And the kids.

[Rich]

I got to drive it.

[Brett]

The kids are better.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Well, wow. That was a good trade, then.

[Brett]

So you've driven a couple of his rides. Yeah, behind the wheel of a couple of things he's got. All right, I didn't know that. So she's got. She dumped you for the bagel guy. That's a big win because she reaped the benefits. Married him, didn't marry the bagel guy. Okay, so didn't get any of his.

[Rich]

And Then moved on to Charles in Charge.

[Brett]

So was there. There's no. Like. I just. This isn't working out. She just tells you, hey, I'm moving on to this guy?

[Rich]

No, not specifically.

[Brett]

But you knew.

[Rich]

I kind of did.

[Brett]

You know about bagel guy while you were with her, like he was looming at all times?

[Rich]

Oh, no, there was no crossover with the bagel.

[Brett]

We.

[Rich]

We kind of broke it up, but it happened quick. They. They met.

[Brett]

All right, well, that's pretty good. Thank you, Kenny Loggins preaching Brady's life.

[Rich]

I still had to work with her too.

[Brett]

You worked together? Yes. Where? I've worked with you for what? How come I didn't. Did I know her? She's just before.

[Rich]

Jesus Christ.

[Brett]

This is the mist, man. I. I got there in 96.

[Rich]

It was like maybe the year after you. You had gotten there.

[Brett]

She left.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brett]

I worked weird. I wasn't with people for the first 10 months. Yeah, there might be middle of the night stuff. I understand. Brett might understand.

[Rich]

You're a night out.

[Brett]

Yeah. The lifestyle was not exactly, you know, it didn't lend itself to being one of the crew.

[Brady]

Your social calendar was pretty open at that point. Yeah.

[Brett]

Let's just say bagels weren't on the menu because they weren't open by the time I was leaving at three in the morning. So she was there and I. Wow. All right, so she wasn't all that successful. She was a radio salesperson.

[Rich]

Yep. Did pretty well on that. And then went into national sales and.

[Brett]

Yeah. How about that?

[Rich]

Found her suitor.

[Brady]

And then have them.

[Brett]

She moved to Bridgerton. What do you mean? She found her suitor. All right. And then have the guy. And now where is she? You know, you keep. You got to keep tabs on somebody that kicked your ass like this. The ones I won.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rich]

You know, the last I. I know, she remarried. It's tough living in the Biltmore area.

[Brett]

Okay, so she's still around here?

[Rich]

I believe so.

[Brett]

Okay. When you're a lifelong prick, your friends tend to be. Also. So they'll remind me when the ex wife does something monumental, just as I do to them. For instance, my friend Colin, who only dated a girl once and it's still like the biggest failure of his life because she married into the Kansas City Chiefs Hunt family.

[Rich]

Right.

[Brett]

And it's. It's every time they do anything, he's. It's great. What about you? There's nothing on that, you know, not abandoned.

[Brady]

I got nothing here. And move on because I got nothing compared.

[Brett]

Have you lost a few as an overnight guy. You've lost nothing. Are you not willing to admit.

[Brady]

No, no, I would admit it. I got, you know, no shame in my game with that. No, I. I can't think of any that I've really lost. Yeah, I know I've won, you know.

[Brett]

You won one? Oh, yeah, big time.

[Brady]

Yeah. I got a newspaper article sent to me from one of my buddies with her mug shot in Oklahoma or something like that, that she was writing scripts and all kinds of stuff. That's what mine was doing. Yeah.

[Brett]

At the same thing.

[Brady]

Stole a pad and.

[Brett]

Yeah, yeah, I got a letter.

[Brady]

Looking at the picture, you're like, oh, Christ, I dodged one.

[Brett]

Maybe the best day of my life, honestly, next to the birth of my non. Children and all that stuff. I got a call from somebody I used to know years earlier. It was actually an email first that said, I'd love to talk to you. I've got something going on. A friend of ours is in trouble. And this is. God, 18 or 19 years after that was even longer than that. Like after the whole breakup and all that, whatever. I didn't really know what happened. I knew she went into the world of medicine and stuff and get a call that says, and I don't know if this is true or not, but this was how it's presented since me. It's all been just downhill.

[Brady]

It makes you feel good.

[Brett]

Oh, I felt so good. I think the other person on the phone thought I was going to be like, oh, that's terrible. Well, I've always wished the best for her, which isn't true. Like, I was miserable for, like, I was. I thought this was going to be something good and I'm glad it wasn't. In the end, I'm like, this is great. But, yeah, started writing scripts, lost every, like, license that. And then gave me the number and said, if you call, maybe you can help. Well, that didn't go over at all because I called just to say, hey, I'm just reaching out, seeing how you doing. It's been a long time. Hope you're all right. You know, being a nice guy. But also deep down, a little bit of like, yeah, things are going great over here. I just want to throw that. I don't know what you're dealing with. I hear it's not good. I. Everything's great. I'm just sitting by the pool, I'm talking to you. It's like, you know, it's really good. She didn't answer. And then she sends a text to the person that reached out to Me. That's basically what the. Is Homeburg calling me for. I don't need this right now. I go, yeah, well, that's a huge win. Huge win. Nothing but trouble. And then I got. Somebody sent me your address right after Zillow started. And I valued her existence. And.

[Brady]

Like, even Hopkins is like, I.

[Brett]

Ain'T got five grand for that.

[Brady]

I'm good.

[Brett]

Doug would give her five grand, and he'd overpay for the house. The $5,000 guarantee is 3,000 too much for where she's living. And, you know, look, all the best to you, but there is. Humanity is like, you know, I hope you don't fail too badly, but I hope you don't do better than me. Lost one badly. Won one.

[Brady]

Yeah. I'm not saying I didn't lose one. I just can't think of one offhand, especially after hearing Brady's story.

[Brett]

I got Brady's, not Strange man. Brady's lady couldn't wait to get out. She was combing through the Fortune 500 to get out of the Brady relationship. I don't remember why I was talking about that, but I. Oh, because that guy that emailed me. You'll see. You'll see, because it's a great. It's a good one. I'm happy he did it. And he also recognized. Well, you'll see.

[Brady]

Got us on the edge of our seats here.

[Brett]

Yeah, I know. Good radio prep. That's what we do. We tease. That's coming up at 7. 14 on the 14 sickness.

[Rich]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brett]

98 KUPD. Holmberg's Morning Sickness. Maybe the dumbest thing radio executives have ever done. We're gonna do stuff on the sixes. Nobody does anything on sixes, you dumbass. What are we in Europe? It says. This one says, I think it would be a great idea going back to the piss pants. This email says, if you guys plan tomorrow to have future piss pants in your lives, we just start Wet Wednesdays. Give us fans, the show of the show, an idea of what it would be like if you just soiled yourself and tried to continue doing a radio show. Wet Wednesdays for KUPD listeners, where we all, all us men piss ourselves and then go home to our ladies and go, I thought this was. I'm watching the commercials. All the ladies. You all seem smiley and have. Get those off. You're not putting those in the wash with my clothes. I thought this was a product you guys look forward to. Look at all the people in the commercial. Smile Not a man. No man. This guy says, I took my 84 year old mother to lunch last Friday at the new Casino on 303 in Waddell. Food was good, but I didn't like the atmosphere for gambling. Whatever. Like a big, huge video arcade. My point is, in the middle of lunch, my mom leans in and says, I'm wearing Depends. When your mom says that, she might as well lean in. Whisper in your ear, I don't have any panties on. Needless to say, it ruined my lunch. I was having a salad, not tacos. That would have changed everything. I thought the memory was erased until your show this morning. Now I'm wondering if they're washable. I'm thinking about my mother's underwear too much.

[Brady]

They gotta lift her there.

[Brett]

Justin has the line of the day. It says, dear God, don't let there be an edible pair of those someday. Edible piss panties. Hilarious. John says Brady's sad because the breakup ruined bagels for him. He's mourning the loss. All those free bagels. He needed to keep it together with that girl. That's true, my friend. Dr. Jordan's wondering if you're all right. He says, Brady having a stroke. He sounded a little helpless during that story. This story clearly still stings. Jordan.

[Rich]

I wasn't sure if I wanted to open up on this story. You know.

[Brett]

Brady, you've won one breakup that we all know about. When Porkopolis closed, so many other people lost out. That's nice. Signed all the gastrointestinal doctors in the Valley. That's true. There's a lot. It was a big business hit for you Said. I just saw the commercial for that piss underwear, John. And every woman who orders it gets a night. Hate Monday's Garfield the Cat coffee mug and an absorbable blanket. Yeah. When does it end? It's like I don't wear my piss painting. So I got to put on. I got to have a blanket that absorbs urine. It's just time to live alone. Enjoy the cats. Because your house smells like that already.

[Rich]

All right, here we go.

[Brett]

Before we get to this, a couple more things to talk about. By the way, they've already said that the Super Bowl Sunday is the number two most watched television event in history behind the moon landing. And it eked out last year's super bowl for number two.

[Rich]

Like three million.

[Brett]

Yeah, and that's before streaming and all the other stuff. It's the most viewed television event in history. That's incredible. That's flat. Amazing.

[Rich]

So 28 million.

[Brett]

It's. It's importance and relevance to us is right on par as far as, you know, being part of it as watching a man walk on the moon for the very first time.

[Brady]

And the crazy part is, most people you talk to about the super bowl, kind of, yeah, whatever. I'm just watching it.

[Brett]

But you got to.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Because there's nothing else to talk about. Otherwise, the next day, you're dead. Yeah, it's. That's pretty. That's pretty awesome. And I did see something made me very happy yesterday. Dr. Jordan, who's listening? I. Probably. Same for you. Good. Good amount of fires and destruction in Philadelphia. And anything that makes that town burn down, I'm thrilled with. I don't understand it, but there was a gaggle of people pulling down street lights and laughing and having. And kicking them out like they. I didn't know the street lights still work when they're laying on the side of the road. So the light's red and it flashes to yellow, and then everybody starts stomping it out like, what did this? Why are you guys doing this? And then they lit things on fire. They toilet paper all over the center of the intersections, and they just light that on fire. And like, come on, classy place. Let's take down Philly.

[Rich]

Saw two guys in Eagles jerseys. One. One. One in Eagle jersey, other in an Eagle hoodie, and they had stolen the police horse. Two horses.

[Brett]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Brady]

Nothing but class.

[Brett]

It's Philadelphia. That's. It's a dump. I mean, even back in the late 1700s, our founding father said, we gotta get out of here. We've made a mistake. All right, here we go. This is. Well, before we get to that, I also want to say I'm sorry to Brady, he's also got another thing to worry about. Not only is bagel Batcave lady still floating around the city, and that's probably bugging you. Bothers me a little bit. My ex wife and her charitable endeavors. And then Bruce in Geneva buy the blah, blah, blah estate in glorious Texas. And there's pictures of it. It's in the news packet. It was a news story in the, I think, Austin area. Look at this. Remember that giant mansion over there? Well, these two just bought it. I was married to her for a minute. God damn it.

[Rich]

She's doing fantastic.

[Brett]

Why didn't I meet him before her? I'd be having gay sex in a negative edge pool with a millionaire. There's also. Oh, this one says, I dated a girl while I was in the Navy, wanted to marry her, but we broke up just before I proposed. Fast forward five years. I googled just because we do that. She was arrested in Branson, Missouri, for kidnapping a man and holding him hostage in a hotel room and torturing him because he owed her heroin money. Dodge that one. Still got the dub, though. Nice job, Brad. Well done. To leader. You have any wins?

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, the obvious one.

[Brett]

No, that's a loss. That's true.

[Dick Toledo]

Dodged it charges from the attorney general.

[Brett]

You do have. All right. You're the champion. Play. We are the champion. That's right. Yeah. I didn't even think about how great. Because it's. She's still around and I like her. She's a nice person. I haven't talked to her in ages, so maybe she isn't anymore.

[Dick Toledo]

She's the crazy one. On the way to Brett's house.

[Brett]

I do. But ditching. Like, ditching crazy and then having her go on and win is the worst. Yes. So I don't. Do you know what happened to the crazy girl that you got rid of.

[Dick Toledo]

That was just spiraled down?

[Brett]

No kidding. She's a mess.

[Rich]

Oh, yeah.

[Brett]

The one that left her kids at your house.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, that one is.

[Brett]

She's.

[Brady]

Can't keep them straight.

[Dick Toledo]

That's a third one.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

She's on drugs up in Flagstaff.

[Brett]

Oh, right. Toledo's dick leads you straight to heroin. It's a gateway. Gay or hero or lesbianism. Like the first wife. Outstanding wins. So she's. Yeah. And the one that you. Your first. The wife.

[Dick Toledo]

That's what I was talking about.

[Brady]

The big win.

[Brett]

You know, that's. That may be untoppable in the room. I mean, the only person that's had it worse than her is Brady. Obviously, it's terrible what happened to him. But the. Yeah. So she. Actually, she is a. The best part is I've had multiple real estate people say. Do you realize that Toledo's ex wife is a cautionary tale on the real estate test? It's like, named after her.

[Rich]

Yep.

[Brett]

The thing she did wrong. And then she went to the who scout for a couple years.

[Dick Toledo]

Quick update. She's almost paid off.

[Brett]

No kidding. Well, that's. How about that? Good on her, right?

[Rich]

Win.

[Brett]

That seemed like an insurmountable mountain. Oh, God. Yeah. Because she was.

[Dick Toledo]

When she's renting a 500 apartment in Mesa.

[Brett]

Yeah. And you were just ceiling beaming. But the bad thing is you had to drop your son off there every once in a while and realize.

[Dick Toledo]

No, she.

[Brett]

She.

[Dick Toledo]

I mean, I dropped him off there, so they go to lunch, but we weren't.

[Brett]

Never stayed at the 500amonth.

[Dick Toledo]

They're in custody at that point.

[Rich]

He was at a hotel.

[Brett]

He was with me down on Main street in Mesa. The Lost Dutchman. She was living in the Lost Dutchman for a minute. That is a huge win. Good on you, man. Before we get into anything like, you know, I hate to break another thing. Brady's heart's clearly shattered and he's trying to put pieces.

[Rich]

No, I can. Had a win. I would have been able to afford that.

[Dick Toledo]

Didn't sound like it.

[Brett]

Those are some rose colored glasses, my friend. It wasn't about you being able to afford that. I mean, she moved on because you can't. She left you knowing exactly your potential.

[Rich]

Move on.

[Brett]

This is pathetic.

[Dick Toledo]

Why do you do this to yourself?

[Brett]

Why do you do. Just take the l. Don't try to rose this up. You got your ass kicked on that one. We've all got one except him. Toledo's managed to, you know, date drug addicts the whole time and jailbirds.

[Dick Toledo]

Guy says, Christ, is Pop Pop the only one in the room whose ex didn't end up with a mug shot after they got separated?

[Brett]

I don't have any mug shots.

[Dick Toledo]

You don't have any mug shots?

[Brady]

I did.

[Brett]

You sure? Maybe I don't see mine. I bet you did. I bet I did too.

[Brady]

She got busted for scripts.

[Brett]

Yeah, I bet you're right. Yeah, well, she got. Yeah, you're probably right. I don't know that she ever. Maybe she did look it up. You know names.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, you know this person?

[Brett]

Well, doesn't know.

[Brady]

I met her one time.

[Brett]

She was a nurse when he met.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

She's still allowed to do that?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Not for much longer, though. And she introduced herself as, like, my former fiance. Yes. Yeah. And Brett goes. Met your fiance? And I'm like, huh? And he. Yeah, he broke that down.

[Brady]

Like, fix this broad. I want to get the hell out of here.

[Brett]

Yeah, your. Your lady was busted. Yes. And my mine got busted and mine found gold and yours. Yeah. And you sit back and go, that's good. Because I could have never kept up not realizing that she said, this guy's got no potential. I'm leaving.

[Dick Toledo]

Brady, I'd like to thank you for scarring my brain this morning because I actually pictured you in the Robin outfit.

[Brett]

Riding around in the Batmobile if Robin's in it and he's dressed and Brady's dressed as Robin. It rhymes with Batmobile, but it's not. I think maybe you should get out here, Robin. The mileage is going down at an unreasonable rate Holy mpg. We're gonna have to jettison some weight here.

[Rich]

Launch the bat anchor.

[Brady]

Holy bagels, Batman.

[Brett]

We're veering to the right. The Joker's getting away. Maybe if I just jumped out, I could have caught you, you harlequin hooligan. But I was carrying a little extra weight that day. We've got Robin on a treadmill. Anyway, Domino's is now doing something. It's just not fair. All these people on Ozempic. Everybody's trying to lose weight, even with poisons in their body. And whatever they can put in there to do it without any repercussions known to man, they're shoving it in there. Good on you if it works. But keep your fingers crossed that your bones don't disintegrate. But Domino's ain't making it easier. This year they're launching pepperoni perfume. America has spoken.

[Rich]

We're not gonna get it.

[Brett]

What?

[Rich]

Only in the uk.

[Brett]

Is that right?

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Oh, he already looked into it. Of course he did. Research his order already. Information, research.

[Rich]

I got my sources.

[Brady]

Can I import this?

[Brett]

Well, of course. Your algorithm brought you that news. I had to search for that. And Brady's like, oh my God. Terrible American news.

[Rich]

It's happening. Pepperoni cologne.

[Brett]

Brady, we're going to try as hard as we can to get that to you. I'm so sorry.

[Rich]

Thank you.

[Brett]

We're going to make America great again. And have all the ladies reek of pepperoni. And when they walk by, you're gonna say, that's America. And I love it. I love it. I really do. A woman that smells like a sausage. There's nothing better, nothing quite as good. Not as delightful. A lot of people say, I don't want my lady to smell like a sausage. But in America we say, yes, we do. We want everything to smell like sausages. A sign of success, a sign of prosperity. You know who doesn't smell like sausage? The ladies of Africa. Not one of them. But I bet you if you wandered one of our thick white American broads across the African continent smelling of pepperoni, well, there's no doubt you'd be pregnant. USA Pepperoni smelling ladies. And I don't know who that's worse. The husbands that want their wives to smell like pepperoni or a guy who thinks that's good, or the woman who goes, I know how to get a man. And she squirts on a little Domino's pepperoni and trolls for D. I think.

[Rich]

I just fell in love.

[Brett]

She doesn't. Brady. She'd be good she's not gonna go running off with some bagel guy. You're exactly her standard. I have low expectations for your future.

[Brady]

He'd be out there with a boombox and everything, like Cusack.

[Rich]

I know if I call her, she'll be at my place in less than 30 minutes. Yeah.

[Brett]

Have you ever lost a breakup, Rich? You've got three super sized wins.

[Dick Toledo]

Fourth one. I forgot about the paternity test.

[Brett]

Jesus Christ. I did too. This guy just hit me. And wasn't she a mess, too? The paternity test was between you and eight.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, I had a type, John.

[Brett]

Yeah. Classless. Although I like that.

[Dick Toledo]

I'm sure I lost. I'm sure I lost.

[Brady]

He's definitely a champion. I mean, he's huge.

[Brett]

Four like four zero in. In like drubbing. This is the 92 USA Olympic basketball team. You are not even in close games like this is. It's not fair. We're going to the bench and dragging out Christian Laitner every once in a while. And he's putting up 20 you3 peed it. Yeah, that's cr. You don't have any losses at all.

[Dick Toledo]

I'm sure I do. I'm sure I do.

[Brett]

Because you kept it smart. Yeah. You found trash. You stayed with trash. That way you can't lose. That's brilliant.

[Dick Toledo]

I'll go through the Rolodex here in a little bit.

[Brett]

Brady's running around the country club trying to drag ladies out. Meanwhile, she's side eyeing. Come on. Remember me side eyeing? The Jew with the bakery? Who's that, Shlomo? Yeah, he's nothing.

[Dick Toledo]

Anyway, side eye.

[Brett]

Don't you think you should rub this pepperoni on your body. And have a different smell in your eyes? It's brutal. Morning sickness.

[Rich]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brett]

Holmberg's morning sickness. Yeah. What are you, the noid? For God's sakes, you want your lady to smell like pepperoni? All right, here's the letter from. This is good stuff. And again, it's on the heels of winning and losing a battle. And sometimes you win and lose with relationships or with just this. I love. And I'm gonna have to have you go back and find it because I couldn't. I actually looked.

[Dick Toledo]

Okay.

[Brett]

It says, I'm not including my name. I'm sure after you read. Oh, this is so good. I'm sure after you read it, you can probably go back in your archives and find me. It will then be up to you whether or not you flame me more or if you let this go, I'll leave that up to you. But this is something I have to do. Little over a year ago, during the Gilbert Goons hysteria, I got a little wrapped up in the entirety of the situation. I realized I was fairly reactionary and maybe doing and saying things I should not have or at least should have thought about before hitting the send. In fact, without having done this, I would have never listened to your show. And after I did write you the letter to refresh. I'm the man who called you a poor man's Howard Stern. Now, he's the one who started the whole liberal Jew. He was calling me all sorts of names and stuff. Remember, it was a. He said that I was a. Something like all I was a poor man's Howard Stern. And as far as he could tell from one listen, all I had was the Biden loving liberal cuck Juno's part down or something like that. Still hilarious. Yeah, liberal Jew cuck. Something big. No, he insulted me, but you know that. He said, I'm the man who called you the poor man Towers, turn. I believe I disparaged your Jewish faith and also accused you of being a liberal Biden supporter. I was also, at the time, way too far political and tribal and I have since amended those heirs. This said, I'm also on my Maya Culpa tour thanks to the program. I was abusing alcohol and it was making me an irrational person. And I did hear you flame me on the radio after my letter. And then someone maybe you did a spot on impression of Howard Stern, whom I loathe. That's beside the point. I am emailing to apologize and tell you that in order for me to advance as a human, I have to do this to the people I have wronged. You embarrassed me completely as a racist and illogical person by name, and you weren't wrong. I apologize and I hope you can let it go as well. I really want to include my name, but I don't think I'm there yet. Thank you for your time. Please accept my apology. No, not a big enough person, you drunky. I hope you end up in a gutter.

[Rich]

What I didn't like is I have to.

[Brett]

Well, no, that is part of the program. That's true. Yeah.

[Rich]

It's good you want to throw that in like, you know, they tell me I should do this and I want.

[Brett]

To do then Brady, you may have caught it. He's not going to work. This program's not going to work. He'll be back on the bottle by Noon. And let me just say this real quick as a poor man's Howard Stern look, listen, Boozy. Look. The 5% success rate of Alcoholics Anonymous is what you need to focus on, because you're going to be back in the bottle before you know it. Once an asshole, always an asshole, I say. Isn't that right, Red Robin?

[Rich]

Yum.

[Brett]

Brittlejuice. Yay. Yay, Bubba Bastard.

[Rich]

Yes.

[Brett]

All I think is that you emailed in because you feel terrible about what an asshole you were last year, how wrong you were, and how right I ended up being. That's what's bothering you? I win the breakup, as we say. I moved on, and you hit the Jack Daniels. I mean, that's essentially we made a great character out of your nonsense and you became a character and wandered around the streets asking for nickels for boots. Now, in that letter, and hopefully do find your name, because I'll use it. In that letter, you didn't include how many times you had to blow guys to associate your need for alcohol. Maybe a goon. Maybe you found a Gilbert goon and you jerked them off in a parking lot at the. You know, the in and out. Oh, great joy. When I saw that this morning on the emails, I'm like 6:08am Boom. Good luck on your journey.

[Brady]

You're like Toledo just winning.

[Brett]

Back to the bottle. The old poor man's Howard Stern wins again. Let me have a sip of my non alcoholic Coca Cola because I can control myself. Ah, that tasted like success, that sip. And look, I'm still sober and my thirst has been quenched.

[Rich]

Caught up in the goonery.

[Brett]

Yep. And who said it? You're overreacting, you goon nuts. If I recall correctly, that dude threw out like all like he was. He tried to be. If I remember the letter right, it was all flower. This one was a little too, like, flowery and well written. Like he was like Louis Louisa May Alcott or something. It turns out, you know, he's just 1990s Robert Downey Jr. Talk about the time you dressed up as Wonder Woman and you had to blow strangers and homeless guys for a sip of their math dog. And then. And then you managed to go over to a public library, find the Internet, and email me and tell me what an asshole I am. In other words, you were drunk. No, look, seriously, I hope you get better. And I will for sure pitch pennies out of my incredibly expensive car as I drive by and leave them in the gutter for you when you end up there again. Isn't that right, Red? Robin.

[Rich]

Yum.

[Brett]

Red Robin. I. I also understand that the lady that left you is married to this boozam now. So you win again. Nice job. She went from bagels to bat caves to drunks. Oh, and remember, remember in the letter how he said, oh, this is like when the Grinch's heart changed mine feels three times bigger than it did before. Reading it on the air was even better than reading it quietly in. In the office next to you. It was so hard for me not to go. I forgot what I was gonna say. I was just so happy you're reading that letter. Yeah.

[Rich]

Relishing the fact.

[Brett]

No, prior to that I had something else, but just. It doesn't matter. Oh, he said that he goes, maybe he. Remember how he, he. He went on and on about like. Because I was saying, basically the Gilbert Goons thing is just Gilbert losing their minds over a crime, a terrible crime, but you had one politicians run and win on. We only had one crime last year and they had town halls and they were on TV and the media was milking it and it was pitchforks and torches and the teen violence problem. And I'm like, maryvale. Even went on TV and said, hey, guys, happens every day where we are. And we're like, shut up. Not in Gilbert. And Gilbert lost their minds and the moms were on TV and they. And they dressed up. And on the comments on the things it was all about killer boots. Love that shirt. Had nothing to do with the topic. And then I said something like, look, you want to be a big time city, Gilbert, you want us, you want bars and you want activities and you want people. With. With more and more people comes more and more trouble. It's just the way cities work. So you've graduated from trying to be a burb to wanting to be Scottsdale. And guess what happens every once in a while? Trouble. Because you bring a troubled element and you bring it out. And so I said, that's just the way it's going to be for you from now on. And he emailed back, maybe in neighborhoods you choose to live in, you allow that kind of behavior because basically you're trash and you live in trashy areas. We care about our neighborhoods and who's there. Yeah, that's what your neighbors used to say. Drunky.

[Rich]

Interesting you bring out the point about the growth because I was talking to someone yesterday and they said they'll see the growth. Like in Gilbert.

[Brett]

Yeah, Brady, this isn't about Gilbert right now. If you're going to go down the road of.

[Rich]

No, they're building so many apartments. But as far as the growth part.

[Brett]

Good. You know what? He's going to need one because he probably lost his house because he spent all his money on alcohol.

[Rich]

Can't afford that. First and last.

[Brett]

Ah, golly, this is fun. I sure would like to have a list of people you're apologizing to. And the fact that I made the list, I admire. I do. I think that's great. Mainly because it made me feel great about myself. Sure, I got problems. Everybody's got problems. My question is, I got 99 of them. But you know what? One of them isn't drinking. I can do it tonight and then come back just fine. I'll make it to work in the morning. So.

[Dick Toledo]

Making amends.

[Brett]

I get that.

[Dick Toledo]

That's part of the program.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

But how are you supposed to take it if, like what you're doing if the person you're supposed to apologize to says F, you still are. You supposed to just suck it up and go, okay, that was.

[Brett]

You did your part. Yeah, right.

[Dick Toledo]

You can't get mad at.

[Brett]

Right. I don't know this prick. And it's not my problem that he had a drinking issue. And it certainly isn't my problem that while he had a drinking issue, he decides to point me, call our advertisers, try to get them to get me fired, and now he wants me to accept his apology. Go yourself right back into the liquor store. Don't care. Oh, you know what? Next time I see you, drinks on me. Because you're water. You're free. It won't cost me anything. That's the Jew part of me. Remember when you were making fun of all the Jews and Kanye? Please accept my apology. It was alcohol. No, I'm glad you're not going to drink anymore. Are you still an. Because it wasn't because of the alcohol, which is making you a little louder. You go over and fire off that email disparaging the entire Jewish faith. Tell me I'm a piece of trash. Call advertisers trying to get us kicked off the air. You wanted me. You wanted my life to be as bad as yours is now, and you wanted to be responsible for it. And you want me to go, that's okay. Hope you're doing well. No get hit by a bus later today, too. You drink up, buttercup. Yeah, Guzzle it out and then stagger into the freeway. I don't care about you at all. You tried. You tried to ruin lives.

[Rich]

I'm sorry. Here's letter. Go. I'm out of here.

[Brett]

End of story. You tried to ruin lives. Calling advertisers. I got calls from friends who are advertised. This guy's making a mockery of things. He's got a couple other ladies doing it too. They put a list on the website of people to call to try to ruin Brett's life for no reason. They didn't like me. But Brett had to go. You had to go. Salespeople downstairs would have lost their jobs. People in 20, 30 people die of employment because you decided you didn't like me. For one comment, it's because you were drunk, loser.

[Rich]

Asking to boycott business.

[Brett]

Boycott this business. Yeah. And. And then trying to wreck lives that just happen to know me. He's good friends with Doug Hopkins. Never used Doug. He's good friends with Eric Bryan. Never used Precision. Never used New ac. Went on and on calling them, and I got that email from one of them, and it said, hey, we got this guy kind of flaming you on that. I'm like, yeah, that'll happen. What are you gonna do? He wants everyone in this building to suffer and not have jobs because he's a miserable drunk. Now that we know that before he was just a dick. Now he's a dick with a bottle. And then he. Then he went off and went all racist and stuff with the Jewish thing. Probably an Irishman. I would never do such a thing.

[Rich]

Not the Irish.

[Brett]

Anyway. I paid my dues. Too soon to sing this.

[Brady]

Not at all.

[Brett]

Yeah, you got it for me? Oh, yeah. This is for you, boozy. This is my theme song. Every time you think of me, I want this to run your mouth. And I'll do it as poor man's Howard Stern, too. But I've committed no crimes. That's right. In other words, I've made mistakes and bad mistakes. Yeah, I've made a few of those. Yeah, no doubt. Isn't that right, Bretel juice? Oh, this is for. From me to you, drunky. Going to the rah rah room tonight and gonna drink a little bit with a couple friends. Cause I can handle it. I'm allowed. I am the champion. Poor miss Howard Stern. Oh, yeah, and you back into a bottle like a genie. Anyway, am I going on too long about this? I'm so happy about it. Brady's texting. I gotta get a new job.

[Rich]

No, I just heard from a guy.

[Brett]

That looks at hiring. Hey, Beth, I want to be a friend. This guy's out of control. He celebrates. That's great. Who was what you were texting?

[Rich]

I just think the same guy. He's fired off to you was in a defamation suit. And at. I think it's the same crew. And. Good.

[Brett]

Oh, banging into people over there in Gilbert.

[Rich]

Not only was he sending letters to us, he was, you know, like, calling out other businesses and personally attacking one of my friends.

[Brett]

Ah, see, well, he's gonna try to use alcohol as an excuse. And I don't. I don't accept.

[Rich]

That's why I was like, oh, this is interesting.

[Brett]

Don't accept it. That's. Alcoholism isn't a choice. But the decisions you make while you are one are. You weren't out of control completely. And I appreciate you, you know, the mea culpa. But I am rooting against your success because you tried to get fired. Pull that with me once. Bye. Bye. Do you have any empathy for the man? No. No. I just went over the Rolodex. Anything? No. Thanks for the email. And you were smart not to bring your name up. And I won't do that because then he's. He sounds silly. He sounds like Drake. Basically. I'm petty like Kendrick.

[Brady]

Go, Kendrick.

[Brett]

Yeah. If this guy's ex girlfriend shows up, she's gonna be dancing on our website just like Serena Williams. Which. Whichever one. And I, I. You know, I don't wish like this on a lot of people, but I want to take you out for a Long island iced tea and just watch you devolve into the mess you were about four months ago. The great thing is that you're going to waste most of the money that you're not spending on alcohol on your 28 day programs that you're going to have to keep going back to. Who else did you email? I wonder who else is on the list because maybe it is your guy. Oh, I sure hope so. That doesn't go for all you people in the program. Some of you have legitimate problems and. And tried to fix yourself. But the ones that tried to get me fired, I. Welcome back. I hope you're in a halfway house.

[Rich]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brett]

98K Holmberg's Morning Sickness. And the best part is he was bragging about where he lived, that there's no crime. He was the one. He was the one no one wanted to live by. Staggering around probably in his underpants. All right, Brian, we're gonna get you back in the house again. I've had it with that poor man's Howard Stern making fun of our neighborhood. You're not helping. Best thing your neighbors ever saw was my friend Doug Hopkins coming And giving you a cash offer for your home. So you get the hell out of there.

[Brady]

They kicked in too.

[Brett]

Five. I'll double that. We'll guarantee Doug five more if he gets them out here tomorrow. Hey, sorry about that whole letter thing about your friend staring the Jew.

[Rich]

You sound better.

[Brett]

Had somehow stuck out because now I live in Maryville with all the criminals.

[Brady]

Last time I seen you this happy.

[Brett]

It's been a while, man.

[Rich]

Today was a good day.

[Brett]

Yeah, it's been amazing minute. Yeah, this is. This tirade you're throwing is the equivalent of the beepers going off in the enemy pockets and down there in Gaza. Yeah, this. This is my beeper revenge. Ah, this guy says you are such an to that goon. And we the people love it. Thanks for making today great. You bet, citizens. Anyway, this one f that guy get sober. Welcome to the real world that we responsible adults have always been a part of. Glad you have remorse and hopefully you develop into a full human being. Until then, you. Not only that, you tried to ruin all these people's lives by taking away their favorite. Morning, Bob.

[Rich]

It's gonna take a little time.

[Brett]

It's not taking time with me. Decision made. Pour some cement on it. You know what I'm gonna do today? Later? It'll piss him off even more. I'm gonna tip out a little alcohol to my homies. Oh, he hates when you waste that stuff. He'll probably lick up the grass where I drop it in my yard, which he no longer probably has. Anywho, I love it. Congratulations to me, Brett. Thank you, Brady. We win. That's a big win. I didn't realize how happy it was going to make me to do that. I just thought I'd read the letter and go, hey, how about that? But then really, the joy came out and I said, why not just. Let's just light this on fire. Sorry. Anybody have a cigarette?

[Rich]

Was it you yesterday? I've heard that they're doing a documentary on this guy. On the goons.

[Brady]

Oh, no, I didn't know. I haven't heard that one.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

I think Channel 12 is doing their own kind of trying to recap. Dive into it because.

[Brett]

I'm sorry. I just got real excited about everything, try to reset and have a normal day, but I don't know if I can because I'm bouncing off the walls. I want to celebrate. How would he celebrate? Oh, I'm going to do the same thing, only I'm not going to lose everything. Hey, my ex girlfriend lives in an $85,000 condo. In Tucson. She might be looking for a roommate. Toledo's son's making some money, at least more than you. And he's under control. You go help him out. Anyway. Love it. Yeah, I'm sorry, I just had to finish that up a little bit. This guy says, does this not know any better than to sharpen your tongue with wit? Your only competition is the daily drive to perfect your craft. I agree with you completely. Bw. I actually felt the punch of your response. I hope this isn't somebody you know pseudonym and you actually run into. Oh well.

[Rich]

Well.

[Brett]

Hopefully doesn't become unhinged and stagger towards me and it'll be a pretty easy fight cuz you just go and boozy hits the dirt. They taught me that in tactical black. Of course. He's tactical Johnny Walker Black, so it's easy to knock him down. Anyway, I'm sorry, Brett, what do you have in the big board of celebratory songs today? Yes.

[Brady]

All right, Wake Up Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop. Of course, Josh has got the new store going on over there at Power McDowell open right now, but the big grand opening going on February 22nd. We're going to both be out there. He's going to be giving away a couple bikes and all kinds of stuff. So it's all happening. Actionrideshop.com but in the meantime, you can go into the OG store right there on Gilbert Road and Southern. They're going to get you all dialed in with everything you need to get up on the, on the trails, on the mountains, whatever. They got you covered. Actionrideshop.com so Brett, Brill Juice.

[Brett]

Remember a couple years ago when I let Mad Dog off the hook for his best? Mad Dog just emailed the company and said, how come this guy's bailing on us? Let us off the hook again. Mad Dog keeps getting hurt in this deal and this Guy's Mad Dog 2020 habit needs to be revisited. Don't let Mad Dog off the hook like I did. Oh, I mean, listen, listen, Anonymous weirdo. Wouldn't it. Wouldn't that sweet, sweet elixir of Mad Dog on your tongue right now be the greatest thing in the world? I think, I think right now, when you're going through this and you're getting flamed on the air and you know who you are and it hurts deep down, the thing that could fix it is just the sweet, sweet taste of alcohol on your tongue. I think that would be a nice thing. Maybe take a big swig just for memories. I think That's a great idea. You know, I think the Tap Dragon's open at 6. You should wander over there and just say, you know what? A water and a chaser of Mad Dog. The only thing that fixes your misery right now is the sweet, sweet taste of a beer. That cold beer in your hand with a condensation on the outside. And you take a little sip and you're like that. You got me good. And then that. You know what? I'm feeling a little better. With each sip. You'll feel a little bit more like yourself. A drunk asshole. How you like me now? Poor man's Howard Stern now. What? You can't hear me because of all the noise with that crank in your mouth while you blow guys for cash. I'll wait till you're done.

[Rich]

A bottle of Manischewitz.

[Brett]

That's what I'm gonna send over. Does that have alcohol in it? I don't even know. Is it juice? Yeah. It's okay. Just making sure. I don't know. I don't know. Jew wine. I like the good stuff. And you know who I would turn to on that? You know what, Brady. You got that friend Billy. Let's send him a gift card to Billy's Total Wine Stores and see if. You know what. That's a good idea. Thank you. I appreciate the apology. And here's a little gift on my end for being a little rude to you. A lifetime supply of anything you want from Total Wine. It's on me. Take me deep. I have these Euphoria. And this is just great. What a day. Sorry. Go ahead, Brad. All right.

[Brady]

On the list. Metallica. Motley Crue for Events, Slipknot, Bullet for My Valentine. I Prevail, Panthera, Velvet Revolver, Winger. Three Days Grace, Orbit Culture. And then System of A Down. The Pizza Pie, song for Brady and his Domino's perfume and Ice Cube. It was a good day for you.

[Brett]

So your friend Brady emailed or text you just now and said, I think the same dude. Did he email and apologize to him?

[Rich]

That's what I was checking.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Rich]

Have you gotten anything yet? But the case went away.

[Brett]

Oh. Well. So he actually had a lawsuit against somebody. He was not even involved in this.

[Rich]

No. But he was defaming my. Basically.

[Brett]

Oh, your friend sued him.

[Rich]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Because he was calling the media and said, here's a name. Here's a name. Gotcha.

[Rich]

I don't have anything to do with it.

[Brett]

Right.

[Rich]

Business has nothing to do with it.

[Brett]

Throw my name out there one more time. Yeah. Great stuff. Ah. Anyway. You Pick one. It was a good day by Q.

[Brady]

It was for you.

[Brett]

I know that ain't bad.

[Brady]

I like the system of A Down for Brady's pepperoni perfume from Domino's.

[Dick Toledo]

I found the email.

[Brett]

You did? You found an email or his name or the. The audio? The audio. I'm not going to use his name because he's Suey. Not even a little bit.

[Dick Toledo]

Well, I don't know if his. If he said. If you said his name when you were reading. I don't remember.

[Brady]

Get ready for the dumb button.

[Brett]

No, I'm not gonna do it. I. We won't replay it. We've had our celebration. If you want to listen to it, run it Saturday on the Best.

[Dick Toledo]

No, if you're looking to go back on the podcast is from January 23rd.

[Brett]

And find out the guy's name.

[Dick Toledo]

Yep.

[Brett]

If we use his full name. Leave him alone. That's all I'll ask.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't think you did because you. You even said the email is from a made up Gmail. So he wouldn't have given you his real name.

[Brett]

Well, yeah, that's probably true. All right, well, then we'll never know who he is. But he actually acted like he did give me his name last time. He doesn't remember his blackout. The alcohol blacked his brain. You know what he would love to hear right now? A little ice cube, but not the singer in the bottom of a glass right before he pours in. Stir it and then stir it up like little scotch. Maybe some says rack. This guy goes for it. I'm sorry. No, you're not. No, you're right. I'm sorry to you guys that I'm enjoying it too much. I'm sorry that I'm having the greatest day ever and you can't relate. I hope someday an alcoholic apologizes to you and you don't. You don't forgive him. It's a great feeling. Goes back.

[Dick Toledo]

What have you been doing 20 years now? Love to hate.

[Brett]

Yeah. Hate brings us together. I mean, think of the. Look at the joy that came from this. He hated me. Even this guy.

[Dick Toledo]

Even the drunk guy.

[Brett]

Yeah. He hated me to start it. I didn't hate him. I don't know him. He started to hate, so I'm hating him back. And look at what it's done. It's brought great joy to the wonderful. He would have celebrated like this had I been fired a year ago. Yeah, he'd have been tap dancing right in there with Mark Curtis and Troy Hayden going, I got him. He'd have been thrilled. Still hitting the bottle, saying, I'm the petty one. Yeah, and it would have. And he probably would have been. It might have been the end of him.

[Dick Toledo]

Have his own party bus.

[Brett]

He'd have been just as petty and miserable as I'm being right now towards him had he gotten his way last year. Now I want to thank Brady because I know I didn't do it. For praying to God and making this guy's life fall apart. Excellent work, Brady. Dear Lord Jesus, however you worded, he answers, how now I may believe. If you told me right now I prayed that guy's de evolution into existence, I would be like, you know what? I'm going to church with you on Sunday. I was wrong about this whole atheist thing. If you can pray people's lives into the gutter and bless Kirby and Ronnie on the refrigerator and keep it running, and also if you could wreck that jackass's life, call John a Jewish. I'd appreciate it, like, in any way possible, too. Substance abuse. I don't know, some sort of STD his wife gives him anything. I'll leave that dealer's choice up there.

[Rich]

Lord old Jesus, and thank you for getting rid of that bagel business.

[Brett]

And thanks for the bagel business turning.

[Dick Toledo]

On its side, which is an odd thing because on one side he's for your Semite and on the other side he's in.

[Brett]

If the bagel guy sometime prayed to his de Hanukkah. Harry, now that my bagel business is gone, could you make it so that tub of goo over there and Chandler loses his ass on porkop?

[Dick Toledo]

I still want to see that karma.

[Brett]

Brady prayed the bagel away, and this guy prayed the pork away. It's basically the Middle east and two restaurants. Ting, ting, ting. Oh, there's a nice fresh glass of ice. What do we use? Water? Coke? I have an idea what you're going to use. Anything. Rubbing alcohol, hairspray. Get on it.

[Dick Toledo]

John, can you give me a top five of your hate tree now? Did this guy jump into the top five?

[Brett]

No.

[Rich]

Tree is grown.

[Brett]

He's not. Oh, the hate tree is. It's a. It's got forest. It's a national forest now. There's. There's no logging allowed. It's protected land. I don't have like a list. They, they, they, they reveal themselves. I didn't know I hated this guy till I got that letter last night, but I'm enjoying the hell out of that. Anyway, you don't have any other radio stations in town wishing death on a listener. That's where we're different. I don't want him to get, like, murdered. I want it to be his fault. Oh, man. I think we all agree that. You know what? Toledo, go get me a beer out of the fridge. I'm gonna celebrate. I'm gonna celebrate.

[Dick Toledo]

This guy said, how come acdc have a drink on me. Is.

[Brett]

Oh, there it is. Play. Have a drink on me. All right, that's going out to the Gilbert, former Gilbert resident from your good friend, poor man's Howard Stern, the Jew Biden loving cuckoo. Oh, it's a good morning. Anyway, I'd like to hear from his wife. I hope she's out there. This guy says this morning is just fantastic. Your response to that drunk jackass proves why you're an asshole. But you're the people's asshole. Everyone gets hit equally. If you're a dick, you'll be treated like a dick. F that guy, agreed. Now, I hope, really deep down I hope you cure your drinking problem for me. To you. And then seek years and years of therapy and try to cure being an asshole, because I don't think you can do it. That's a lifelong journey. Anyway, this one's for you. Tap Dragon's running specials this morning. I'm thinking about buying the swizzle in free drinks for that guy forever. It's AC DC. It's 98 KUPD. We win. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. It's out of control now.