Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – Condensed Short Show – February 12, 2026

Episode Overview

On this condensed Thursday edition, John Holmberg, Brett Vesely, Audrey, and Frenchie gather for a blend of irreverent banter, listener interaction, and offbeat take on current events and pop culture. Brady is notably absent, prompting the crew to roast his reaction to “sugar daddy” talk from the previous day’s episode. This show features a wild Michael McDonald impersonation contest, a discussion about boundaries in language (especially in light of on-air scandals), and meandering but pointed commentary on sports, celebrities, and the absurdities of everyday American life. The tone is classic HMS—raucous, unfiltered, and sharply amusing.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Brady’s Absence and the Sugar Daddy Fallout (01:02–06:24, 31:11–31:47)

• Brady is missing due to illness, leading to speculation about whether he survived the previous day’s encounter with an outspoken female guest (Sarah) who discussed having a sugar daddy.
• The team gleefully recounts how Brady fled the sugar daddy conversation, likening his escape to Carl Lewis running from danger. (“He had his track shoes on and was running down the hall like Carl Lewis.” – Brett, 01:23)
• There is speculation that the encounter “broke” Brady, and possible reasons for his fear (“I think he thought she might have been demonic.” – John, 02:17)
• Memorable moment: They debate the ethics and hilarity of sending nudes to radio listeners, finally agreeing that Brady wouldn’t survive such an incursion into his cautious world.
• Quote: “His fear was my favorite part of the entire day.” – John (01:40)

2. Listener Response and Dating Game Aftermath (03:16–06:24)

• John shares that a surprising number of ex-felons/felons reached out about the previous episode, enjoying the Dating Game segment.
• Details emerge about relationships formed/would-be formed from the show, and the wild card energy Sarah brought to the station—much to Brady’s horror.
• The group reflects on the social spectrum they witness, and how radically opposed it is to how Brady and “his bubble” (family) navigate Tucson society.

3. Cancel Culture and Language Boundaries: Nicole Curtis Scandal (07:14–15:33)

• John discusses former HGTV host Nicole Curtis (“Rehab Addict”) reportedly being fired after a racial slur was captured on a hot mic during a filming session.
• The crew dissects apologies for “words not in my vocabulary” after on-air slipups, joking that if someone knows how to use a word in a sentence when angry, it’s clearly part of their vocabulary (“You knew how to use it in a sentence. It’s part of your vocabulary. We got to stop that. But the apologies are so stupid.” – John, 11:29)
• John relates personal rage at DIY projects, describing his own habit of cursing in a Scottish accent to relieve frustration—emphasizing the difference between private venting and public professional standards.
• Quote: “I’m allowed to blurt out something like, I got Tourette’s. Is that okay?” – John (14:04)

4. James Van Der Beek’s Passing, GoFundMe Ethics, and Medical Rants (15:57–23:23)

• Breaking news of James Van Der Beek's (fictitious in this transcript context) death, prompting discussion of his legacy and humor regarding “vanilla” TV personalities.
• Debate arises around the GoFundMe for his family, questioning why a celebrity needs a $1M+ fundraiser and suggesting the money could be better spent advancing non-invasive cancer testing tech (“...put it towards technology to keep fingers out of our asses at the doctor’s office.” – John, 19:04).
• Extended, comedic rants about men’s reluctance toward prostate exams and recent improvements in blood testing vs. the “old school” finger method.
• John recounts a comically traumatic early medical experience, hinting an unnecessary prostate exam left a mark on his psyche.
  • Quote: “If you go in my ass dry, there’s a chance [the N-word is] gonna fly out of my mouth.” – John (17:42)

5. Little Albert and the History of Experimental Psychology (23:40–31:03)

• John discusses the infamous “Little Albert” experiment in early 20th-century psychology, where a baby was conditioned to fear animals via loud noises.
• They highlight how modern parenting is far more protective by comparison, mocking claims that “kids today have it hardest.”
  • Quote: “Your kids have it so easy. Just read Little Albert to them. It needs to be a children’s book. At least. You’re not Little Albert.” – John (30:12)
• Reference is made to the absurdity of child cages on city apartment windows in the past versus today’s hypervigilant attitudes.

6. Coconut, Plums, and Food Disgust (32:31–35:37)

• The hosts riff on National Lost Penny Day and National Plum Pudding Day, with John launching into a memorable, gross comparison between strawberries and an alcoholic’s nose, and between coconut and human hair.
  • Quote: “Strawberries, same exact texture, shape, and bite resistance as an alcoholic homeless man's nose. Each seed represents every pore with a blackhead in it.” – John (33:12)
• Memorable moment: John claims he’d rather eat hair pie than coconut cream pie.

7. Michael McDonald’s Birthday & Listener Contest (35:37–45:40)

• It’s Michael McDonald’s birthday (age 74), inspiring the hosts to teach listeners how to mimic his singing style (pull cheeks apart and sing).
• Listeners are invited to sing Nine Inch Nails songs as Michael McDonald for a chance to win concert tickets.
• The contest brings in quirky listener performances, with “Oliver” impressing as the best Michael McDonald impressionist.
  • Quote: “That Michael McDonald doing ‘Closer’ worked. I want to hear that.” – John (42:03)
• The hosts banter over impressions, leading to some intentionally awkward singing and comedic commentary (“You’ve got more cheek to pull… All right, go ahead, Chunky Mike McDonald gone.” – John, 43:13)

8. Sports Rant: Suns’ Resting Players and Fan Frustration (45:50–51:29)

• John vents over Phoenix Suns resting key players for “load management” before the All-Star break, despite fans paying big money and planning months in advance for marquee matchups.
• Audrey adds that average families may only afford a couple games a year, making the team’s disregard for ticket buyers particularly aggravating.
  • Quote: “Devin Booker is resting for the all star game and the three point shooting contest. He’ll play. I promise you he’ll do the three point shooting contest…” – Audrey (49:21)
• Suggestions are made that teams should refund or compensate fans for games where stars are healthy but rested.

9. Celebrity Birthdays & The Athlete "Jock Tax" (51:39–55:15)

• The crew lists notable celebrity birthdays, especially Michael McDonald, with recurring gags about singing and “pulling cheeks.”
• They discuss the “jock tax”—athletes getting taxed by states for games played in those locations, using Super Bowl winner Sam Darnold as a humorous and maddening example.
  • Quote: “So you get taxed on where the game is at, not where you live.” – Brett (53:56)
• Insights into the complex tax burdens faced by pro athletes, and critique of policies that leave players owing more in taxes than some game checks are worth.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote / Moment | |-----------|----------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:23 | Brett | "He had his track shoes on and was running down the hall like Carl Lewis." | | 01:40 | John Holmberg | “His fear was my favorite part of the entire day.” | | 11:29 | John Holmberg | “You knew how to use it in a sentence. It’s part of your vocabulary. We got to stop that…” | | 14:04 | John Holmberg | “I’m allowed to blurt out something like, I got Tourette’s. Is that okay?” | | 17:42 | John Holmberg | “If you go in my ass dry, there’s a chance [the N-word is] gonna fly out of my mouth.” | | 30:12 | John Holmberg | “Your kids have it so easy. Just read Little Albert to them… At least. You’re not Little Albert.” | | 33:12 | John Holmberg | “Strawberries, same exact texture … as an alcoholic homeless man's nose.” | | 42:03 | John Holmberg | “That Michael McDonald doing ‘Closer’ worked. I want to hear that.” | | 49:21 | Audrey | “Devin Booker is resting for the all star game and the three point shooting contest…” | | 53:56 | Brett | “So you get taxed on where the game is at, not where you live.” |

Timestamps for Major Segments

• Brady/Sugar Daddy Fallout: 01:02–06:24, 31:11–31:47
• Nicole Curtis Language Scandal: 07:14–15:33
• James Van Der Beek, Medical Rants, GoFundMe: 15:57–23:23
• Historical Parenting / Little Albert: 23:40–31:03
• Food Disgust, Coconut/Plum Rant: 32:31–35:37
• Michael McDonald Contest: 35:37–45:40
• Phoenix Suns Rant: 45:50–51:29
• Celebrity Birthdays "Jock Tax": 51:39–55:15

Takeaways

• Tone: Unapologetically unfiltered and hilarious, with a blend of pop culture, listener engagement, and sharp sarcasm.
• Best for: Longtime HMS fans and anyone who enjoys morning radio that’s part standup, part talk show, part local Arizona flavor.
• Notable: Leans heavily into the humor of inappropriate or awkward situations, and finds recurring comic gold in ordinary food, medical procedures, and sports fans’ pain.

For New Listeners

This episode’s highlights include a unique “Michael McDonald sings Nine Inch Nails” contest, sly social commentary through the “Little Albert” story, and plenty of inside jokes—especially at the expense of absent cohost Brady. If you enjoy quick-witted group banter, unpredictable tangents, and a hefty dose of irreverence, this is a prime sample of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness at work.