02-12-26 - Entertainment Drill - THU - w/Bret And Dale Hellestrae - Teaching Dale To Sing Like Michael McDonald - How Pro Athletes Are Taxed Depending On Where They Play Games

Summary

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Episode Overview

Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: 02-12-26 - Entertainment Drill - THU - w/Bret And Dale Hellestrae
Date: February 12, 2026
Theme:
A lively, jokey, and occasionally touching conversation featuring John Holmberg, Doug Hopkins, Dale Hellestrae, and Bret. The crew riffs on parental responsibilities, Michael McDonald's birthday, music and movie trivia, memorable country love songs, and, most substantively, how pro athletes are taxed based on the states and cities where they play. The episode is peppered with playful antagonism, impressions, and trademark irreverent banter.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Difficulties of Parental Care and Dignity

• Jokes about caring for aging parents:
  Doug and Dale debate the limits of what children owe their parents, especially regarding undignified caretaking.

  • Doug sets a funny but clear boundary:

    "If I ever have to wipe my dad's thighs, yes, he's lost his dignity." (03:00, Doug Hopkins)

  • He humorously calculates a “five-wipe punchcard” based on his own childhood.

• Dog/parent comparison:
  Doug notes how putting down a pet doesn't freak him out, but wiping a parent is emotionally different.

  • "The dog didn't do that. Like, if your dad's, like, crying, 'don't look at me, wipe my thighs.' I'm like, oh, God, shut up." (03:51, Doug Hopkins)

• Step-parent boundaries:
  Doug draws a line with his stepmom:

  • "Real mom, stepmom. I'm not touching her. No. My dad's the only one allowed back there. He married her. He can wipe her." (03:14, Doug Hopkins)

Memorable Moment:
Dale jokes about issuing his daughters "the pill" for if they ever have to care for him in that way. (04:33)

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2. Michael McDonald’s Birthday and Impromptu Singing Lesson

• Michael McDonald turns 74:
  The crew celebrates the soul legend’s birthday (07:05) by attempting to sing in his famously unique style.

  • Doug tries to get Dale to "sing like Michael McDonald," using cheek-pulling techniques.
  • Dale feigns ignorance:

    "I don't know the words." (07:35, Dale)

• Running “cheek jokes”:
  High school memories, face-pulling, and confusion about which “cheeks” to pull, leading to rapid-fire innuendo.

  • "Why is everybody—I said take your fingers and grab your face cheeks. I even said face cheeks." (07:23, Doug Hopkins)

• Impressions spill into other impersonations:
  Jerry Jones impression comes out as they joke about needing help with hygiene in old age. (09:23)

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3. Entertainment Drill: Birthdays and Pop-Culture Trivia

• Celebrity birthdays segment:
  Speed rounds with commentary on various celebrities turning a year older (08:10):

  • Josh Brolin, Arsenio Hall, Joanna Kerns, RG3
  • “She used to be a looker.” (08:24, Dale on Joanna Kerns)

• Music history:
  Al Green’s “Let’s Stay Together” hit #1 on Valentine’s Day, 54 years ago, sparking more impressions and jokes.

  • Dale attempts “Let’s Stay Together” in Michael McDonald voice (09:08)

• Notable Quote:

  "Loving you." (09:11, John Holmer, channeling Al Green/McDonald)

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4. Top Underrated Movies of the 90s

[10:27–12:32]

• List from Looper.com gives the guys a chance to showcase their pop-culture knowledge:

  • Notable picks:
    • "Go" (#10)
    • "Jackie Brown" (#7)
    • "That Thing You Do" (#5)
    • "LA Story" (#4)
    • "Barton Fink" (#3)
    • "Darkman" (#2)
    • "Pump Up the Volume" (#1)
  • Dale is briefly stunned by Doug’s deep recall:

    "This blows Dale's mind that I actually know things." (11:33, Doug Hopkins)

• Doug and Dale riff on “LA Story” vs. “LA Confidential,” and the era’s film stars.

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5. The Most Memorable Country Love Songs

[12:32–13:39]

• Debating and joking about which country song is the “best love song of the century.”
  • Doug’s quips:

    "My dog's anus is tight." (12:35, Doug Hopkins, as a parody country lyric) "My fingers smell like fish and I don't eat sushi. I remember that one." (13:28, Doug Hopkins)

  • Genuine picks mentioned:
    • "Amazed" by Lonestar (#5)
    • "Speechless" by Dan & Shay (#4)
    • "Tennessee Whiskey" (#3)
    • "Remember When" (#1)

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6. The Return of Loudness, the Japanese Metal Band

[13:39–14:15]

• John announces the Japanese metal band Loudness is going on a world tour.
• Doug offers campy commentary on their accent and stage presence.

  • "They couldn't say L's, so their name was Loudness, but they called themselves Roudness." (13:49, Doug Hopkins)

  • The guys mimic and mock their song “Crazy Nights.”

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7. In-Depth Segment: Athlete "Jock Tax" and Super Bowl Winnings

[14:30–16:30] (Primary Insight Section)

• Sam Darnold's Super Bowl story:
  Former NFL player Sam Darnold makes $178,000 for winning the Super Bowl, but because the game is in California, state taxes and the "jock tax" take a huge bite.

  • "Sam Darnold will pay more in taxes for the Super Bowl than he made playing in the game." (14:35, Dale)

  • He gets taxed on salary, not just winnings, leading to a tax bill of about $225,000.

    "Yeah, you get taxed more. So he's gonna have to pay about $225,000 in taxes." (15:03, Dale)

  • John sums up the issue:

    "So you get taxed on where the game is at, not where you live." (15:03, John Holmer)

• Historical background:

  • Philadelphia was the first city to implement this (15:21).
  • Expanding to multiple states, players could end up with 10+ tax forms per season (16:05).

• Potential pushback from NFLPA:
  Dale notes the Players Association might resist future Super Bowls in California due to the tax consequences.

  • "It'll be interesting to see if the NFLPA comes to the rescue and says no more Super Bowls in California." (16:30, Dale)

• Humorous take on loser parties:
  Dale never had to attend a "Super Bowl loser party," and the guys debate the misery of celebrating second place:

  • "There's a guy by my house who in his garage hangs an Arizona Cardinals, 2008 NFC Champions banner. And I'm like, 'Go Steelers.' It's second place, second place." (17:03, Doug Hopkins)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On parental care:

  "If I ever have to wipe my dad's thighs, yes, he's lost his dignity." (03:00, Doug Hopkins)
  "I got a punch card ready. Space for one more?" (04:20, Doug Hopkins)

• On singing like Michael McDonald:

  "Why is everybody—I said take your fingers and grab your face cheeks. I even said face cheeks." (07:23, Doug Hopkins)

• On “Jock Tax”:

  "Sam Darnold will pay more in taxes for the Super Bowl than he made playing in the game." (14:35, Dale)
  "So you get taxed on where the game is at, not where you live." (15:03, John Holmer)
  "I literally had eight away games...and then by other tax, you had 10 state tax forms." (16:00, Dale)

• On the misery of “almost winning”:

  "There's a guy by my house who...hangs an Arizona Cardinals, 2008 NFC Champions banner. And I'm like, 'Go Steelers.' It's second place." (17:03, Doug Hopkins)

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Timestamps by Segment

• [01:24–04:25] – Parental care, dignity, and boundaries
• [07:05–09:14] – Michael McDonald’s birthday, impersonations, and singing antics
• [10:27–12:32] – Underrated 90s movies list and commentary
• [12:32–13:39] – Greatest country love songs discussion/joking
• [13:39–14:15] – Loudness band, metal nostalgia
• [14:30–16:30] – Athlete taxes, “jock tax” explanation, real salary impacts
• [16:30–17:59] – Super Bowl losers, silver medal syndrome, and parties

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Summary

This episode exemplifies Holmberg’s Morning Sickness' blend of irreverence, nostalgia, and real-life insight. The conversation darts from the absurd and affectionate debate about parental care to pop-culture favorites, with the highlight being Dale Hellestrae's insider commentary on the tax nightmares pro athletes face in championship games. Laughter, impressions, ridiculous song parodies, and genuine camaraderie make this episode a fun ride, even as it delivers informative takes on little-known realities in professional sports.

Perfect for:
Listeners who enjoy sports, pop culture, and sharp, unfiltered humor with genuine moments of insight.

Transcript

[John Holmer]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Doug Hopkins]

It's John Holmer here from the morning sickness. Time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of my home group and Doug Hopkins.com another satisfied listener called TVs Doug Hopkins and sold her home for cash. She reached out. Her name's Ashley, and Doug wants to make it simple. Buy your house for cash as is. You don't have to do anything. Just like Ashley, no strings attached. If he moves that price, you get $5,000. Want to sell that place? Start the process online@doug hopk hopkins.com or grab the phone and sing Hopkins 1-800-now.

[Comedy Announcer]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the valley this week. Downtown and stand up live. Get out and see the comedy of Moshe Casher and the up and coming Ari Maddie. Up north of Desert Ridge, you'll get Josh Wolf and SNL's Tommy Brennan. And eastside of the Tempe Improv. Don't miss the very funny Sam J. And more Josh Wolf for the complete lineups and for tickets, standuplive.com desert ridgeimprov.com and tempyimprov.com.

[Dale]

Sickness.

[Doug Hopkins]

You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. That's too far. I see this why we can't have cameras in this. Yeah, yeah, I just, I didn't.

[Dale]

We just figured out John doesn't have a heart.

[Doug Hopkins]

I have a heart, Dale. But it's. We were talking about, you know, kidnapping an 85 year old person. There's a lot of cleanup. There's a lot of responsibility. Nobody wants that.

[Dale]

But you also said that you took your dog in last week and. Yeah, sad. Whenever you have to put a dignity. We give them dignity, you know, Give your dad dignity.

[Doug Hopkins]

No, I would give him dignity.

[Dale]

You put a limit on it.

[Doug Hopkins]

Look, my dad, if my dad starts. If I ever have to wipe my dad's thighs, yes, he's lost his dignity.

[Dale]

You said you'd give him five times.

[Doug Hopkins]

Well, I'm gonna call him an ass. Maybe as a kid, maybe my dad wiped my ass five times. And I'm. And I'm knowing him the way I know him now. Probably my mom was off like, I just need a break. And she'd leave and like, I'll watch it. And he just. He stared at me for a while. Put me in the crib.

[Dale]

I smell so.

[Doug Hopkins]

And he'd Leave. And like, thanks.

[John Holmer]

Probably made your sister do it. He's like, he's not even doing it.

[Doug Hopkins]

Good chance of that. Yeah. But also, he probably was like, all right, I'm gonna get screamed at if I don't do something. So more than likely, if I know my dad, he ran water in the sink in the kitchen and put a stopper in there and then, like, made a little pool, took the thing off of me, threw it out, threw up, dunked me a couple of times, and then put a diaper over my filthy ass. And then my mom came home, and he's like, yeah, I changed one of them, but I think he did it again. And then she would go in and do the real cleanup. You know, he did the half ass. He shoved all the laundry under the bed and then told her, like, oh, wow. Dish gloves on. Yes.

[Dale]

Or the elbows.

[Doug Hopkins]

Oh, so maybe I owe my dad five white. I owe my mom everything. A lot of that.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

Still not gonna do it, but I owe her. I will pay someone. Gladly.

[Dale]

So does your mom get more chances than your dad? As far as your real mom or stepmom?

[Doug Hopkins]

Real mom, stepmom. I'm not touching her. No. My dad's the only one allowed back there. He married her. He can wipe her.

[Dale]

Okay?

[Doug Hopkins]

And plus, if my dad dies first, we'll probably never see her.

[John Holmer]

Who's this broad?

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah, who's this broad?

[Dale]

You got a guest room?

[Doug Hopkins]

Oh, chicken. More than happy to have her visit. She's very nice lady, but I'm not wiping her ass. Yeah, no, that's not happening. But ass wiping for parents is rough.

[Dale]

So you just. You just talked about the. The bonding, the moment with you and your dog, the last few moments, and it didn't even freak you out, but all of a sudden, touching your dad in a moment of need because he's.

[Doug Hopkins]

Screaming back, like, don't look at me. Like, the dog didn't do that. Like, if your dad's, like, crying, don't look at me, wipe my thighs. I'm like, oh, God, shut up. I'd be screaming back, just be quiet. Neither of us want to be here. And then you just. We have an agreement to push a pillow. But I'm thinking about it. I owe him maybe five wipes.

[Dale]

Okay?

[Doug Hopkins]

There's no way Dan wiped my ass more than a handful.

[Dale]

So do you look at him on the fourth one and said, dad, oh.

[Doug Hopkins]

I got a punch card ready. Space for one more?

[John Holmer]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

And he'd look at me, and you just hear like, this is it. This is the Last time.

[Dale]

I told you, I'm gonna get one of those pills, sign out whatever they are, and give one to each daughter. And the first time you have to do it just.

[Doug Hopkins]

And let's be honest, like, my dad's 80. If somebody kidnapped him right now, I'd be like, we're good, he's all right. Look, they'd be giving everybody a break. Like we don't have to talk to him for a little while. I'd go on the news and I'd. Somebody find him. And then for like three days, it'd be in Cancun. I'd be doing.

[John Holmer]

You're not going to Tucson to find him?

[Doug Hopkins]

No, I'm not going to walk around Tucson and state. People get disappeared over. There's a killer on the loose in Tucson. What am I going to walk around and look for the man for? I wouldn't even if my dad, like, I'd look around and be like, there's looks like somebody broke in and took him. I'd still tell the news. I think he just wandered off. I don't want to. I don't make a.

[Dale]

Last time I saw.

[Doug Hopkins]

I don't want to make a fuss here. If somebody's got it.

[Dale]

Dad's a big man.

[Doug Hopkins]

He's a bigger dude.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

Not huge, not. Not so much anymore. He's probably. I mean, for an 80 year old man, he's in great shape. He's 78 or 79, I guess, but he's 6ft 210 pounds. Yeah. Yeah.

[Dale]

Bigger than you. You're 5'11.

[Doug Hopkins]

He's probably 5'9, 5'10. Now he's shrunk. I'm 6ft exactly, Dale. And 205 and looking good. Oh, yeah. No, the abs are popping. Shut up, Dale.

[Dale]

So's the nose.

[Doug Hopkins]

Oh, no, I can't fix that. The face is nothing. You can't work out and have your face get better. It's just what my face is. Shut up, Dale. It's time now for the entertainment drill. And it's brought to you by our friends at the Schwartz Laser Eye Center. Get your eyes fixed, get everything ready. I didn't even know about the reader stuff. They can fix it so. Your reader. You don't even need readers, Dale. They've got a new lens thing you can put in your eye that the one I have organically kind of adapts to your eyes changes so your vision never really moves. The new one, I don't know how new it is, but this one that I just found out about, they can Put the lens in. And then over time, they can adjust it like glasses. So if you're. If your eyes adapt, they're like, oh, we can just get. We can just make that a stronger prescription in your eye. Go talk to Dr. Jay Schwartz. Schwartzer. It's amazing stuff. The technology is incredible. And if you're squinting and driving, you're wasting your time. Get your sight back, have perfect vision. You don't know what you're missing. Until you do, you're cheating yourself. Don't do that anymore. Schwarz lasereisner teamidoc.com they are the team eye doctors of the Suns and the Diamondbacks. Can't help a hand, but they could fix Corbin's eyes if he got popped in the face. That's about as far as it goes. Dr. J. Schwartz is the man. Schwartz, Laser Eisenhower. Brad Entertainment.

[John Holmer]

All right, celebrity birthdays we've already talked about. The big one today was just Michael McDonald turning 74.

[Doug Hopkins]

Can you sing like Michael McDonald? Can you sing like Michael McDonald? Do you have any Michael McDonald? Can you sing?

[Dale]

No, I can't. No. I heard that. It was 10 minutes. Oh, I thought you were saying spread the other cheeks.

[Doug Hopkins]

Why is everybody. I said take your fingers and grab your face cheeks. I even said face cheeks.

[Dale]

Not the time I heard it.

[Doug Hopkins]

There you go. Yeah. And then this. Go ahead, Dale. Pull your cheeks apart.

[Dale]

I don't know the words.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yes, you do. Come on.

[Dale]

You have no shame. This is back in high school for me.

[Doug Hopkins]

Is it?

[Dale]

I think so.

[Doug Hopkins]

Great song. 78.

[Dale]

78. That been my sophomore year.

[Doug Hopkins]

How about that? Yeah, try it. You know what a fool believes when.

[John Holmer]

He gets in a chorus?

[Doug Hopkins]

Happy birthday to Michael.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

Let's keep this going.

[John Holmer]

In the background, Josh Broland turns 58 years old. Arsenio Hall, 70.

[Doug Hopkins]

Get out of here.

[John Holmer]

Let's see.

[Dale]

Wow.

[John Holmer]

Joanna kearns from growing paint. 73.

[Dale]

She used to be a looker.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah, she was a good looking lady.

[John Holmer]

And RG3. 36.

[Doug Hopkins]

He's only 36.

[John Holmer]

I thought he was older than that.

[Doug Hopkins]

Because he blew up as a rookie. Yeah, he was 23.

[Dale]

What do you have, four year career maybe?

[Doug Hopkins]

Well, yeah, he ended up backing up, but, I mean, Mike Shanahan tried to kill him in his first playoff game and let him play with a broken leg. His knee exploded. His knee had blown up and he's like, get out there.

[Dale]

I think he is. Lindsey Vaughn.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah. Oh, man. Too soon, Dale. That poor lady's getting her third surgery this week.

[John Holmer]

And Valentine's Day right around the corner. 54 years ago. Today, Al Green's Let's Stay Together hit number one.

[Dale]

Now you're talking.

[John Holmer]

That's a great song.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

Can Michael McDonald sing there?

[Dale]

Let's stay together.

[John Holmer]

Loving you.

[Doug Hopkins]

You could do this, Dale.

[Dale]

You could do that without pulling your cheeks apart. Pull your pants back out.

[Doug Hopkins]

It doesn't sound the same. Just pulling my cheeks apart. You can hear the difference talking.

[Dale]

You do that for Jerry Jones too?

[Doug Hopkins]

I do my face. Pull back for me.

[John Holmer]

Pull back.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

Gotta pull it all the way back down. Dale, what's this I hear about you wiping people's asses? Is that for hire? Because I need help.

[Dale]

Jerry. Jerry's not too far away.

[Doug Hopkins]

Steven's wiping some flies. Stephen, I've got a little oil spill back here. I think I hit a geyser.

[Dale]

Visit Homebird's Morning Sickness. Online at 98kupd.com it's John Holmerg here.

[Doug Hopkins]

From the morning sickness. And it's time to talk about Doug Hopkins of my home group and Doug Hopkins dot com. Let's talk about the people who make claims. For instance, a company out there, they'll get you 100 of market value for your home. And a lot of times Mr. 100 getting that inspection and says, oh, 100 just dropped because you've got a few more problems. Don't play around with these people. Trust me when I say you can trust TV's Doug Hopkins. He won't play with the offer at all. If he does, he'll give you $5,000 guaranteed. You can start the process at Doug hopkins.com or grab that phone and sing Hopkins. 1, 800, now.

[Dale]

Homburg's Morning Sickness.

[John Holmer]

Looper.com put together a list of the 10 most underrated movies of the 90s. Underrated. Any guesses?

[Doug Hopkins]

For whatever reason, people will say, reality bites. Is it not on the top?

[Dale]

Okay.

[Doug Hopkins]

I just watched the thing on tv.

[Dale]

We're like, this is a movie that.

[Doug Hopkins]

Kind of personifies the 90s. I thought it stunk when it came out. Movies that are underrated. American Psycho.

[John Holmer]

Not on the list.

[Doug Hopkins]

Well, it's pretty highly.

[John Holmer]

2000S, was it?

[Doug Hopkins]

I don't know. What are they?

[John Holmer]

Number 10.

[Shane Orlando]

Go.

[Doug Hopkins]

Oh, yeah, that's pretty good.

[John Holmer]

We'll just skip around here a little bit. Number seven, Jackie Brown.

[Doug Hopkins]

Very. That's a wildly. Did you ever see that Quentin Tarantino movie jacket? It's a great.

[Dale]

Really good.

[John Holmer]

Number five. That thing you do.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yep. That was Tom Hanks.

[John Holmer]

Number four, LA Story. I thought that was bigger.

[Doug Hopkins]

I didn't like la. That was the Steve Martin you've seen all these. Yeah. This is the number.

[Dale]

How did you live life?

[Doug Hopkins]

I. I could get things done. Dale. LA story was the Steve Martin, Sarah Jessica Parker, Danny Glover.

[Dale]

What?

[Doug Hopkins]

It wasn't very good.

[John Holmer]

That wasn't all Kim Basinger.

[Doug Hopkins]

No, that was LA Confidential.

[John Holmer]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Doug Hopkins]

This blows Dale's mind that I actually know things.

[John Holmer]

Number three, Barton Fink.

[Doug Hopkins]

Barton Fink's Amazing. John Turturro.

[John Holmer]

I never said.

[Doug Hopkins]

It's a. Yeah, it's an outstanding. It's a. It's a Coen Brothers movie. It's amazing.

[Dale]

I was in my prime in the. In the 90s, and I don't know anything.

[Doug Hopkins]

And I remember all the football, too. I got it all done, Dale.

[John Holmer]

Number two, Dark Man.

[Doug Hopkins]

Was that.

[Dale]

No, no, that's.

[Doug Hopkins]

No, that's the dude from. He was the retarded guy in LA Law. I can't remember his name. Stop, stop.

[Dale]

Oh, that's right.

[Doug Hopkins]

Liam Neeson's in Dark Man.

[Dale]

Stop.

[Doug Hopkins]

Right? Wow, he's right.

[John Holmer]

All right, and number one, Pump up the Volume.

[Doug Hopkins]

The Christian Slater movie.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

All right.

[Dale]

At least I've heard of that.

[Doug Hopkins]

Pump up the Volume. Also known as. Was that Gleaming The Cube, too? Didn't they change the name of it? Did they change the name?

[John Holmer]

Yeah, I remember the different ones.

[Doug Hopkins]

Okay. Yeah.

[Dale]

Okay.

[Doug Hopkins]

Pump up the volume.

[John Holmer]

This one's for Dale.

[Doug Hopkins]

Just saying, Dale.

[John Holmer]

Best country love songs of the century.

[Doug Hopkins]

Oh, my dog's anus is tight.

[Dale]

Number one.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah, that's what I thought.

[John Holmer]

We'll just. We'll just go with George Straight. Yeah, he is. Oh, well, first, not on. Not on the top 10.

[Doug Hopkins]

What about. Oh, that's just for people. How about. What's that band called?

[John Holmer]

Sister?

[Doug Hopkins]

Coming in at number two. Pull on my ears.

[Dale]

Give us a couple.

[John Holmer]

Number five, Amazed by Lone Star.

[Dale]

Okay. I just heard that the other day.

[Doug Hopkins]

Pegging with a. Pegging with a Budweiser.

[John Holmer]

Number four, Speechless. Dan and Shay. Tennessee Whiskey. At number three.

[Dale]

Oh, you gotta love Tennessee Whiskey.

[Doug Hopkins]

It hurts to pee, but it makes me think of you. I remember that one.

[John Holmer]

Tied for number one.

[Doug Hopkins]

That was number one.

[John Holmer]

Also, number two, Die a Happy Man. And number one, remember when.

[Dale]

Oh, you got to remember. That's a great one.

[Doug Hopkins]

My fingers smell like fish and I don't eat sushi. I remember that one. Mama, Mama. That's fish. Her Fish fries. The best.

[Dale]

Idiot.

[Doug Hopkins]

No, it's a. Yeah.

[John Holmer]

And here's one that John Gordon will be very excited about. Loudness. Coming back to celebrate their 45th anniversary Japanese spring and summer world tour.

[Doug Hopkins]

That's A group, Loudness. They were Japanese metal band. They couldn't say elves because they're Japanese. So their name was Loudness, but they called themselves Roudness.

[John Holmer]

Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

And they had a song called Crazy Nights, but it was Crazy Nights. You can hear it when they sing. The accent is so thick, it's a terrible song.

[John Holmer]

So Loudness fans, and Dale's got a story for you. I gave him a good one.

[Dale]

Well, he gave me two, and I'm not gonna. I'll let the Angeli Jolie wade for Brady tomorrow.

[John Holmer]

All right.

[Dale]

We talked about this on. On my amazing podcast Timeout, 10 o'.

[John Holmer]

Clock.

[Doug Hopkins]

Word for Nine Inch Nails is industrial. Okay. Industrial. We're in hilarious time. Industrial is the word. Go ahead.

[Dale]

Okay. We talked about this on the wildly successful John Holmberg podcast found on all.

[Doug Hopkins]

Your everywhere you find podcast Bumble Dumble. That's right.

[Dale]

Sam Darnold. And this entry, interesting jock tax. Sam Darnold will pay more in taxes for the super bowl than he made playing in the game.

[Doug Hopkins]

178, 000 check from the NFL, the Super bowl winners.

[Dale]

Yes.

[Doug Hopkins]

So he got 178 grand. But because the Super Bowls in California, they have a jock tax.

[Dale]

And so every day you stay. Yeah. You get taxed more. So he's gonna have to pay about 225, 000 in taxes.

[John Holmer]

So you get taxed on where the game is at, not where you live.

[Doug Hopkins]

And you get taxed on your salary, not. Not the winning. So he won 178.

[Dale]

They tax is his regular season salary.

[Doug Hopkins]

Which is two and a half million a game.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[John Holmer]

That's a bunch of.

[Doug Hopkins]

So they hit you. Exactly.

[John Holmer]

It is.

[Doug Hopkins]

You're not wrong about that.

[Dale]

I guess the first city who did this because it started happening in the 90s, Philadelphia was the first city to start taxing athletes. When you play the game there and.

[Doug Hopkins]

That you get taxed on their state.

[Dale]

Back then it was just the game check you got from playing in Philadelphia that day. And you only stayed one day anyway.

[Doug Hopkins]

So does that. Is that a thing? Like when the Cardinals a few years ago. And sometimes teams do this on west coast to east coast. You play Washington and Phil, you stay for two weeks.

[Dale]

Yeah, I stay for. Yeah. 10 days. Yeah. You get taxed for that.

[Doug Hopkins]

Wow. Jesus.

[Dale]

And. And by the end of the 90s, I literally had eight away games. Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

And.

[Dale]

And then by other tax, you had 10 state tax forms.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah.

[Dale]

Crazy.

[Doug Hopkins]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmer]

That's insane.

[Doug Hopkins]

That's not fair. Yeah. Sam Darnold. I mean, he'll Take it. He still got a million dollar bonus for winning it, But I mean, he got hit.

[Dale]

Well, you needed the million dollar bonus. Pay the tax.

[Doug Hopkins]

That's true. Because otherwise. Yeah. It gets hammered on the other side. Yeah. 235 something thousand in taxes.

[Dale]

Right. Because they stayed there for eight days.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah, it's nuts. They got to change that. And again Super Bowls. And so far next year it's going to happen again. Whoever's there next year.

[Dale]

And now, and now there is a push. It'll be interesting to see if the NFLPA comes to the rescue and says no more Super Bowls in California.

[Doug Hopkins]

Well, losing team gets 100 grand each, I think, or something like that.

[Dale]

Yeah, but how much is. I don't know who the best player from the England would be, but somebody's making 20, 30 million dollars probably so. Somebody making 20 million? Yeah.

[Doug Hopkins]

You know, he's getting hammered. Yeah, man.

[Dale]

And getting a Super bowl losing ring, Johnny. And that. I don't have a name for that. Oh, yeah, it's called the. It'll be called the AFC Championship ring. I always called the super bowl loser.

[Doug Hopkins]

It is. Because that's what it is. There's a guy by my house who in his garage hangs a, you know, Arizona Cardinals, 2008 NFC Champions banner. And I'm like, ghost dealers. It's second place, second place.

[Dale]

And I first loser. And the other thing I never had to do, John, was go to a Super bowl loser party.

[John Holmer]

Ouch.

[Doug Hopkins]

They have those.

[Dale]

You have to plan it, you know, 10 days in advance. You'd have been there. 95 if you find it.

[Doug Hopkins]

All my Steelers losses, if they lose there. I have no merchandise of AFC champions.

[Dale]

You would have been if you and I were friends back then. You came to the Cowboy Super.

[Doug Hopkins]

No way.

[Dale]

Oh, you'd be in there.

[Shane Orlando]

Michael.

[John Holmer]

Be up there.

[Doug Hopkins]

I'd have been like, this sucks.

[Dale]

I'd have been miserable. You're so awesome.

[Doug Hopkins]

No, I wouldn't have said that.

[Dale]

Larry Brown, you're the best. Larry Brown.

[Doug Hopkins]

Kicked him in the balls a hundred times. I am done talking to you. We'll do a little loudness. We'll throw some loudness in John. How about that? We'll do crazy nights. Yeah, it's loaded up and ready to go. How about that? Some loudness. This is it, 1985. And I guess they saw this K Pop stuff and thought.

[Dale]

Pat.

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah, let's go. Crazy nights, everybody. Thank you, Dale. Get better, Brady. We'll see you guys tomorrow in the morning sickness.

[Dale]

Hello.

[John Holmer]

Hey.

[Doug Hopkins]

It's not weird. It's Pretty cool, actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this.

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[Doug Hopkins]

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[Doug Hopkins]

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[Doug Hopkins]

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