02-13-25 - BR - THU - Emailers Giving Ideas For Brady's Germany Trip - Michael Jackson Wanted To Play Spiderman - Experts Give 4 Great VDay Gift Ideas - First Time In 40yrs F150 Is Not Top Selling Vehicle

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode Date: February 13, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Broadcasted On: 98KUPD (97.9 FM) | 98kupd.com

---

1. Listener Emails: Insights and Humor Surrounding Brady's Germany Trip

Timestamp: 00:39 - 05:26

The episode kicks off with Brady Bogen addressing a flood of listener emails concerning his upcoming trip to Germany. One standout email is from Brent Bert Brudenell from the Phoenix Open, fervently expressing his desire to join the trip. Brady humorously engages with Brent's enthusiasm while simultaneously diving into a comedic rant about Brent’s dubious character.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "I'll be friendly with your buddies. I'm an awesome guide and I'll teach you proper ways to do the Elon Musk salute."
[02:00]

The conversation takes a wild turn as Brady inventively ties Brent’s antics to fictional scandals involving his family, portraying Brent as a troublesome figure. The segment blends sharp wit with exaggerated storytelling, painting a vivid and entertaining picture of Brady's interactions with his listeners.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "He made your name forever. Vint, Bert, Brent. We'll name him Brand Bert."
[03:00]

2. Michael Jackson's Aspirations: From Pop Icon to Superhero

Timestamp: 09:10 - 35:56

In a humorous twist, the show delves into a fictional narrative where Michael Jackson expresses his desire to play Spider-Man. The hosts engage in a playful skit, imagining Michael Jackson attempting to secure the role and the comedic shortcomings of his efforts.

Notable Quote:

Michael Jackson: "I want to be Spider Man. You can get into little small creases and crevices and like little kids, they have small cracks. I like to be inside of them like a spider."
[09:30]

The segment evolves into an extended comedy routine featuring a character named Zade, who is humorously portrayed with exaggerated physical traits and challenges. The hosts use Zade to satirize and mock various aspects of physical appearance and societal perceptions, all delivered with a mix of sarcasm and dark humor.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "You're going to hate it. You're going to bury my tafunta all 32."
[41:01]

3. Valentine's Day Special: Expert-Backed Gift Ideas and Host Commentary

Timestamp: 15:33 - 18:00

As Valentine's Day approaches, the hosts pivot to discussing gift ideas recommended by experts. Bret Vesely presents four top choices: watches, chocolates, scarves, and kitchenware. Each suggestion is met with Brady’s characteristic skepticism and humor.

Notable Quote:

Brett: "Watches represent the gift of time. By gifting a watch, you'd be promising your partner that you'll be present for them."
[15:50]

Brady's Take:

Brady: "What if the watch stops? Your marriage is over."
[16:06]

The segment continues with a critical and comedic analysis of each gift suggestion, highlighting the hosts' dynamic interplay and Brady’s knack for turning recommendations into humorous critiques.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "Give me some pots. Give me some forks and knives. I'll feed your fat ass."
[18:00]

4. Automotive News: Toyota RAV4 Tops Sales, Ford F150's Historic Slide

Timestamp: 20:08 - 43:05

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to automotive news, particularly the surprising dethroning of the Ford F150 as America's best-selling vehicle after a 42-year streak. Bret presents the statistics, revealing that the Toyota RAV4 has taken the top spot with 475,000 units sold, surpassing the F150's 460,000 units.

Notable Quote:

Brett: "For the first time in 42 years, America's best-selling vehicle is not the Ford F150. The new number one is the Toyota RAV4."
[20:28]

Brady and Dick Toledo engage in a lively debate over the implications of this shift, discussing the rise of SUVs and the changing preferences of American consumers. The conversation is laced with humor as they reminisce about past automotive choices and mock their own questionable vehicle decisions.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "Lesbians are making their move. They're mobilizing worldwide."
[21:25]

The hosts also delve into humorous anecdotes about previous car models, including exaggerated stories about stadium seating and overly functional vehicle features. This blend of factual reporting and comedic banter keeps the segment both informative and entertaining.

5. Zade's Introduction: A Dark Comedy Skit

Timestamp: 35:56 - 43:05

Interspersed within the episode is an elaborate skit featuring a character named Zade. Portrayed as a person with severe facial anomalies, Zade becomes the butt of various jokes and satirical comments from the hosts. This segment showcases the hosts' ability to engage in edgy humor while maintaining a fast-paced and dynamic conversation.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "What kind of accident makes your teeth go to the outside? Why do you want to take your car apart so bad?"
[32:06]

Though intended for humor, the skit pushes boundaries, blending absurdity with sharp wit. The dynamics among the hosts highlight their chemistry and ability to sustain a comedic narrative over an extended period.

6. Community and Listener Engagement

Timestamp: Throughout the Episode

Throughout the episode, Brady, Bret, Jonathan, and Dick Toledo interact seamlessly, bouncing ideas and jokes off each other. They incorporate listener interactions, such as emails and fictional scenarios, to create a sense of community and engagement. Their playful exchanges and rapid-fire humor maintain an energetic pace, keeping listeners entertained from start to finish.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "It's the number one show in the city. It's the only one that gets anything done."
[06:40]

Dick Toledo: "Next."

[42:37]

7. Conclusion: Wrapping Up with Humor and Teasers

Timestamp: 43:05 - 44:17

As the episode draws to a close, the hosts continue their humorous interactions, teasing upcoming segments and maintaining the show's signature comedic tone. They hint at future appearances and leave listeners anticipating the next episode's blend of news, humor, and engaging discussions.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "It's 8.29. Is Jamie here? Yeah, this is a good one. This is a great get."
[44:16]

---

Key Takeaways:

• Brady's Germany Trip: A humorous exploration of listener enthusiasm and fictional controversies surrounding Brady's travel plans.
• Michael Jackson as Spider-Man: An extended comedic skit blending pop culture with absurd scenarios.
• Valentine's Day Gifts: Expert-backed suggestions met with the hosts' unique comedic critiques.
• Automotive Shift: Informative yet humorous discussion on the Toyota RAV4 overtaking the Ford F150 in sales.
• Zade Skit: Dark comedy segment highlighting the hosts' ability to engage in edgy humor.
• Listener Engagement: Continuous interaction and humor fostering a strong sense of community among listeners.

Overall, this episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness delivers a rich tapestry of humor, news, and engaging discussions, all woven together by the charismatic interplay of the hosts. Whether dissecting automotive trends or indulging in playful skits, the show ensures an entertaining experience for both regular listeners and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Dick Toledo]

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[Brady]

I'm getting emails like crazy. This one guy says lay off a Brady and his friend's trip to Germany. I wish I could go on that trip. It's killing me that I'm not going. Brady, I go. I'll be friendly with your buddies. I'm an awesome guide and I'll teach you proper ways to do the Elon Musk salute. While we're over there, please take me with you. We'll call it Schindler's Bucket List. Signed Brent Bert Brudenell from the Phoenix Opens. Oh, he'd love to go with you, Brady. The kid from the Phoenix Open. Dying to get in on your trip to Germany. Brendbert, you're in. Take Brenbert over there to Munich with you.

[Brett]

He might already be over there.

[Brady]

Oh, he's probably gonna want to move there soon. Found out he's that racist kid that was at the Phoenix Open. What a name Brand Burt Brudenelle.

[Jonathan]

It lives up to the family name Brand Burt.

[Brady]

And there's no mistaking that again. It goes back to Paul Manchaka Jr. When he pooped on nurses pretending to be mentally retarded and hired them to come to his house. And he would poop on them because it would give him. And then he'd poop himself. They'd come clean him and he'd get sexual arousal out of them. Wiping his bottom. He was faking it. And when he got arrested, the person I felt most sorry for was Paul Manchaka Sr. Who had to go to work the next day without anybody wondering. Everyone already knew. No question that Mr. Brudenell's dad went to work and said, didn't you have a son named Brand Burt? Yeah, that was my boy. See, I saw him on the news last night. What are the odds of a second Brand Burt Brudenell causing all that ruckus? Yeah, that was my boy. Not Real happy with him. He's in trouble, I tell you. So it was your Brand Bert. That's what I love, when people name their kids something stupid and they screw up. It's forever. And you're known. You're the parents who knew. You've raised a dick, and now it's obvious. And he made it. He made your. Your name forever. Vint, Bert, Brent. We'll name him Brand Bert. A grand name for a grand young man. And he's throwing Nazi salutes out and telling people they need their heads cut off for being Mexican. There's no way people won't know it's our brand, Burt. Brand Bert. It's actually Brandt, Burt. It's even worse.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

So identifiable. But yeah, you can take him to Germany with you, Brady, and drop him off. Brett, what's the over under that? One of these guys goes over there to the. The boozy festival that Brady's gonna go on and slaps out an Elon salute. Gets. Gets. There'll be a photo of that.

[Jonathan]

That's even money that's coming. That's even money. Somebody's gonna be joking about it.

[Brady]

Scummy Dick. Stop doing that. Oh, the little German sirens come by.

[Brett]

Or the things that people were doing on TikTok and Instagram at visiting.

[Brady]

Well, they were getting mad that people were like.

[Brett]

Were they planking?

[Brady]

Well, there was some planking at the. At Auschwitz. And then there was the girl who was doing the. The filtered selfies of her smiling.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Like she was having way too much fun at Auschwitz and, like, taking selfies. Look at me. Pictures at Auschwitz. Yeah. You, Brent, Bert Brudenell and Scummy Dick Douglas are gonna be born. Aunt Bert. You get a kid with a name like that right now, Rethink it. Change it. Go back to the olden days. Brant. Burt Brudenelle. What does that guy's dad do? We need to find out. This kid's 19, so his dad's probably in his mid-40s. Primal life. Feeling pretty good about everything. About to be an empty nester. Raised a Nazi. Got him some tickets to the Phoenix Open, and then he ruined the entire family.

[Brett]

The hedge fund he's looking over.

[Brady]

Yeah. You know, Roland, I told you Sprite.

[Jonathan]

And graham crackers would have been the way to go, dear.

[Brady]

You know what phrase has never been said? No, that was a different Brant. Bert, it's you, man. Hey, Mr. Brudenell, I. A couple questions. I saw your name on the news last night. You have a son named Brand Bert. That's a different Brand Bertbert. Now. It wasn't me. I didn't raise a Nazi. Or Brantford's dad and mom have been divorced for a long time. And you're right, it was all about. Should have stabbed it out. Dad's not happy with it. Mom raised a little Nazi with her stepfather.

[Brett]

That's cute.

[Brady]

Brant bird. A name that we should. We'll put him in there with Nathan Sutherland and Paul Manchaca Jr. Brandt, Burt Brudenell. Welcome to the Zeitgeist. That is Holmberg's Morning sickness.

[Jonathan]

Jonathan wants to know if your trip is sponsored by bluechew.

[Brady]

Oh, there's gonna be blue pills in one of those bags.

[Brett]

Loaded.

[Brady]

Well, one of. One of the dudes is gonna bring. I'll just, you know, I was just joking. And then the next thing you know, oh, you're gonna get so many calls from. That's just bad. You're in trouble. I. I kind of want to go and not have, you know, I'm there with just binoculars and stuff to take the pictures of the Elon salutes. And then everybody drunk. Except Brady. He's holding the stein all day. His friend's getting like, a transvestite prostitute from Berlin. Very angular features. Very angular features. Lantern jaw on that girl. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. Oh, yeah, I almost said it again. It's not. Sponsorship still available. It's the Brady Report, everybody. Brady Report.

[Brett]

Good Thursday morning to you, Phoenix.

[Brady]

Hello, world by the vi. How's our sales staff dropping the ball on this one? I don't know.

[Jonathan]

They always complain when we're full. Oh, I could have sold that.

[Brady]

There was no room for this.

[Brett]

I heard two. Yeah.

[Brady]

Come on. It's the number one show in the city. It's the only one that gets anything done.

[Jonathan]

They're working from home today, so, you.

[Brady]

Know, always complaining about not being able to sponsor Franken and his buddies over there because they don't. They're not local. Can't do sponsorships on their show. Well, here you go. Why isn't Susan driving the hammer down on the sales staff to get that done?

[Jonathan]

I don't know. Good question.

[Brett]

Happy World Radio Day.

[Brady]

It's like Brady. It's the last one. Like ham radio.

[Brett]

It started in 2012.

[Brady]

Oh, radio executive idea. Maybe if we got a day, people would remember us. Since we've the Bob's. Yeah. Since we've destroyed the industry from top to bottom with very few rare exceptions. Maybe if we, like, presented ourselves as World Radio Day guys. People would remember the greatness of radio.

[Brett]

There are over 15,000 radio stations in the US alone.

[Brady]

The question in a meeting I was. We were muted and I was sitting off camera. But the question I heard was how do we get people to start listening to a radio on the radio again? Stop creating sucky radio stations left and right in every market that are the same as the other ones. It works in St. Louis, it'll work in 40 other markets. We call it the Woody Show.

[Brett]

Couple of basis fun facts. Recipes can't be trademarked, but some can be ruled trade secrets. Oh, like the formula for Dr. Pepper and KFC's 11 herbs and spices.

[Brady]

KFC's gotten away with that one. They haven't given up that ever. And people say they've figured it out. And yeah, KFC's like, nope, you missed by two.

[Brett]

Grover Cleveland is the only president who was an executioner when he was the sheriff Erie of Erie County, N.Y. about a decade before he became president, he personally executed two criminals.

[Brady]

That's not true, Brady. There were other presidents who executed people. Well, I guess she wasn't president, but she was getting it done for me. Just pointing it out there. Grover has company. That's all I'm saying. Have fun in Germany. Can I come?

[Brett]

Yeah, sure.

[Brady]

Can I come? How many times you're going to hear that out there in Germany? How do you say that in German? Because your friend's coming and he's going to have to learn how to say that. Leave a minor Ash Kuman. Have fun.

[Brett]

Michael Jackson really wanted to play Spider man in a movie, but he knew he'd never get cast. So in the 90s he actually tried to buy Marvel Comics baggy ass suit.

[Brady]

They wouldn't have a suit tight enough to fit him.

[Michael Jackson]

I want to be Spider Man.

[Brady]

Why?

[Michael Jackson]

You can get into little small creases and crevices and like little kids, they have small cracks. I like to be inside of them like a spider.

[Brett]

By the way, happy birthday, Prince Michael Jackson Jr. He's 28 today.

[Brady]

It's Prince's birthday today. Oh.

[Jonathan]

Man, I didn't.

[Brady]

Did we? Brady?

[Brett]

Happy birthday.

[Brady]

You didn't have to. You didn't have to wish me a happy birthday. By the way, Prince Jackson here, not Michael as clearly the relation couldn't tell the difference, right? Clearly. Yeah, it's my birthday. I'm 28 years old today and still can't shed that childlike innocent voice my father gave me through DNA. Little me. I'm stamping with the man in the mirror. Yeah, it's pretty great being Jackson's son. I do miss Daddy though and might.

[Dick Toledo]

Have gone a little too far with the DNA. What are you talking.

[Michael Jackson]

Hey, you guys. I know it's gonna be hard to tell us apart, but happy birthday. It's Michael.

[Jonathan]

I'm sorry.

[Brady]

Now it's nearly impossible. Phone. He's been dead for 10 years. Phone rings and I say, hee hee. Jackson residents, like we'd like to speak to. To your father's young man. I'm a grown man named Prince. I'm not. I'm not Michael. I'm not. I'm a grown up. I'm not blanket.

[Brett]

Let's hear old Ben.

[Brady]

Ben. Beautiful.

[Michael Jackson]

It's almost like.

[Brady]

Wow.

[Michael Jackson]

It's almost like I'm still alive. And it passed through the genes. The genetic. Like Brand Berg, Brand Burke and his daddy. It's impossible to. To separate the two of us and.

[Brady]

Think about maybe starting my own musical career with all the. You know, now that I'm 28 and I can. I can start using some of daddy's money. I'll build a studio with me.

[Brett]

You want to be starting something?

[Brady]

You'd like to be starting something. Clearly it's in the genes. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brady]

98 PD. Holmberg's morning sickness. You want to be shooting something?

[Michael Jackson]

My God, you're amazing. It's just like I'm here. It's the same stuff.

[Brett]

Great.

[Brady]

Ebony and. Or as Brady's going to say anyway, thanks for wishing me a happy birthday. Unexpected. Unexpected.

[Brett]

Bye.

[Brady]

By the way, learn this phrase. Brady. Ohio. Which is. Can I come? No. I'm not a racist. I'm from Ohio. You're gonna hear that through a wall.

[Brett]

Thanks.

[Brady]

At the Red Wolf Inn.

[Dick Toledo]

No, no. Just download the Google Translate app on your phone. Plug them all in.

[Brett]

The Wolfberg Lodge.

[Brady]

The Great Wolf Lodge.

[Brett]

Of Berlin.

[Brady]

The Great Wolf Lodge of Berlin. Scott of Water Slide.

[Dick Toledo]

What a travel agent.

[Brady]

And a big giant room in the back that only certain people. Yeah, it's very hot. It's a Great Wolf Lodge.

[Brett]

The spacesuit have four star review.

[Brady]

Four stars. Everyone who lives alive loves it.

[Dick Toledo]

Everyone who gets it.

[Brady]

Everyone who understands the principle. The mission statement of the Great Wolf Lodge Munich can return. You'll come back if you guarantee it.

[Dick Toledo]

Or else.

[Brett]

But not for all the spacesuits Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin wore to the moon in 1969 were actually designed and manufactured by Playtex.

[Brady]

New. Somebody points out Prince probably thought dad was Spider Man. With all the webs that got shot around the. Oh, gross. Thanks, Coleman Brown.

[Brett]

There's new research out there that says the perfect nap time is. The time to do it is 1:42pm in the afternoon.

[Brady]

That's right.

[Brett]

And the optimum length, 51 minutes. Meaning you wake up at 2:33. If the nap goes longer than that, around an hour and a half, it can do more harm than good. What was the start and energy? 142.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Brett]

And if it goes to two and a half hours, that's officially a full sleep session.

[Brady]

That's right. That's what I've been doing.

[Brett]

But for some people, even 51 minutes can be too long. One sleep expert advised that naps should be kept short 20 to 30 minutes.

[Brady]

Sleep experts have no idea. My new schedule is the way you need to be. Sleep when you're supposed to. When your body says to, don't force yourself to go to sleep at a certain time. When you sleep, go to sleep naturally. Don't go to bed because it's bedtime. You'll have a miserable night's sleep. Now I'm going to bed. I fall asleep when I fall asleep and I wake up when I wake up. I have emergency alarms, but they're not waking me anymore because they don't have to. I get two hours of sleep and a nap. Dead tired in the middle of the day, which is great. Wake up with no alarms and your life is a better world. You know who's had this figured out for a long time? The African American population. Yes, that's right. Go to sleep when you want. You wake up when you want.

[Dick Toledo]

And my son.

[Brady]

I'm not wrong, Brett. You wake up whenever you want. You just, hey, I'll get to work when I get to work. And it's perfect.

[Brett]

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day.

[Brady]

That's right.

[Brett]

Here's four great Valentine's Day gifts. According to some experts. Watches. The site expert says a watch represents the gift of time. By gifting a watch, you'd be promising your partner that you'll be present for them.

[Brady]

What if the watch stops?

[Brett]

Your marriage is over.

[Brady]

The watch is the thing that lets you know. It's not the gift of time, it's the gift of telling time. And nobody needs anymore. That's dumb.

[Brett]

It's the second one. The gift of chocolate can be traced back to the Mayans who viewed the main ingredient in chocolate as a heart opener.

[Brady]

Huh?

[Brett]

The cocoa in the chocolate. The main ingredient.

[Brady]

Why do you want your heart open.

[Brett]

As a heart opener?

[Dick Toledo]

It opens your heart Step more, John.

[Brett]

So you can. Yes.

[Brady]

It's not real. That doesn't actually happen. Watch Walmart.

[Dick Toledo]

It does too.

[Brady]

No, your heart doesn't. It has nothing to do with it. It's a brain.

[Dick Toledo]

The Grinch was real.

[Brady]

Grinch may have been real.

[Brett]

Scarves is number three. They represent a strong spiritual connection tying.

[Brady]

Her to the bedpost.

[Jonathan]

What twink wrote this?

[Brett]

Kitchen. Kitchenware number four.

[Brady]

Now we're talking.

[Brett]

Despite the backlash against presence which are seen as functional or boring. Can let your partner know that you want to nourish each other's souls and create something together.

[Jonathan]

Like I said. Thank you.

[Brett]

What they're saying not to get is lingerie.

[Brady]

A woman wrote this? Yeah. Leave us alone. We'll even take forks and spoons before we want you to touch us.

[Brett]

2. Alcohol.

[Brady]

That'S. That isn't very. That's kind of a credit gift. That's something you bring to somebody's house for a party. You don't give it to a woman for. You got to get.

[Brett]

Third one is bath salts.

[Brady]

The drugs.

[Brett]

Salt is a cleanser and a purifier. So the gift of bath salts would help rid the receiver any negative negativity in the relationship.

[Brady]

But that's a bad thing.

[Brett]

But it can be toxic. You're telling your partner they need to.

[Brady]

So lingerie, nudity in a bathtub. They're like, don't do that. Give me some pots. Give me some forks and knives. I'll feed your fat ass.

[Jonathan]

There's a Dyson.

[Brady]

Yeah, vacuum, whatever. Just keep. Keep your hands off of me. This is the survey of 45 plus year old women who are all basically saying, enough already.

[Jonathan]

Where'd they hold this garbage survey at Postinos?

[Brady]

After a couple glasses where they're only done Pino.

[Michael Jackson]

I'd rather have forts and knives than have that guy touch me anymore. Why does he hate us so much?

[Brett]

There's a Vietnamese place in Australia that hands out custom R rated fortune cookies. Customers love it. So they recently ordered a new batch for Valentine's Day. But the fortune cookie company made a big mistake. They sent the package to the wrong restaurants. Oh, other restaurants got them that normally send just regular fortune cookies. People who got their fortunes were quite upset at a couple of the places.

[Brady]

What did the fortunes say?

[Brett]

One said, let's see. You're capable of great things, but all you do is look at your phone all day. You won't be that great. Sorry. That's one. But then the other one says this year, the year the snake bears good fortune. Your divorce Is coming soon. Then it ended by saying their spouse is only married. Only married you for money, you ugly C word.

[Dick Toledo]

Nice.

[Brett]

Wow.

[Brady]

I need to get a job writing at this place.

[Brett]

And people at that restaurant love it. I mean, they want to get.

[Brady]

Hilarious. Oh, I'd be incredible. As the awful. Not so much a fortune as more of an assessment of you. Cookie.

[Dick Toledo]

Look at yourself.

[Brady]

Look at yourself in the mirror. Why must you continue to lie to yourself?

[Brett]

For the first time in 42 years, America's best selling vehicle is not the Ford F150. 42 years straight this year, new number one. The new number one.

[Dick Toledo]

Just a Toyota RAV4.

[Brady]

A RAV4 is the number one selling.

[Brett]

Car in the world. 475, 000 units of the RAV4. Man, there F150 did 460.

[Brady]

1, 000, but China and stuff, that's what. That's who gets it off on that worldwide number, right?

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, yeah.

[Brett]

And number three is the Honda CRV. Number four, Tesla Model Y.

[Brady]

They're everywhere.

[Brett]

Number five, the Chevy Silverado 1500.

[Brady]

So the F150s out of the top five. It's been number one for 50 years.

[Brett]

F150 is number two.

[Brady]

Oh, I didn't hear that. Okay. I thought you're just rattling them off. It has a different name coming in.

[Brett]

At 18, 19 and 20.

[Brady]

Isn't the Lobo or something like that down there?

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Number 18, 19 and 20. Subaru Cross Tech, Subaru Forester. Subaru Outback.

[Brady]

Lesbians are making their move. They're mobilizing worldwide.

[Dick Toledo]

You still trying to justify your purchase 25 years ago?

[Michael Jackson]

No, it's a very popular worldwide vehicle. And evidently the scissor dance has taken over India.

[Dick Toledo]

I did the same thing with that Honda car you had with the stadium seats.

[Brady]

Oh, that was the worst one you bought.

[Brett]

It was Ronnie.

[Brady]

It was yours.

[Brett]

It's not mine.

[Dick Toledo]

Your selling point to us was that you wash it out with a hose.

[Brett]

She wanted that car, not me.

[Brady]

And you bought it?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Your name was on.

[Jonathan]

Well, if it was her car, would you drive them?

[Brett]

Avalanche.

[Brady]

Yeah, the Avalanche. But he took that car to work every once in a while. Oh. Cause Ronnie was embarrassed for luncheon at the one time she was.

[Brett]

She misses that car.

[Brady]

She does not miss that car. The back seat was 2ft higher than the front seat. It was stadium seating. It was the dumbest car I've ever been in a car in my life.

[Dick Toledo]

You're looking over. I mean, you're elevated anyway. Over Brady's head. Stupid yeah, sitting behind him here.

[Brady]

Not like I was struggling to see the screen from the back seat. Anyway, it was the dumbest selling. And then the hole inside was rubber.

[Dick Toledo]

Yep.

[Michael Jackson]

You can hose it all out.

[Brady]

Why would you do that? What's going on in here? O.J. that you need to hose out?

[Brett]

Heavy Oktoberfest celebration.

[Brady]

Because you're puking all over the place. But aren't you more worried about why you'd need to hose your car out on a regular basis than that? You can.

[Brett]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brady]

98 Holmberg's Morning Sickness. What was it? It was a.

[Brett]

The toaster.

[Brady]

It was.

[Brett]

It called.

[Brady]

What was that car? It was a Honda, wasn't it?

[Brett]

Element.

[Brady]

Element.

[Dick Toledo]

Element. That's it.

[Brady]

It was horrible. Brady's made some moves. He's had some cars. And the element was yours. You went that day. Did you sign that paper? Did you pay for that car?

[Brett]

I can't remember.

[Brady]

I'm pretty sure I know the answer to that. Did she just roll up one day and say, got a new car.

[Brett]

That's what she wants.

[Brady]

But that.

[Dick Toledo]

Here we go.

[Jonathan]

This guy.

[Brett]

We had some good times in that car.

[Brady]

I'm sure you did the spring cleaning. Oh, driving it up to and fro the raising cans. Yeah. At the car wash. And the sauce Moto would spill and you could hose it all out.

[Michael Jackson]

Look at all that white sauce all over the seats. We're dirty. Get that ranch dressing out of here with a hose.

[Brett]

Police were dispatched to a home on Sunday night in Fort Pierce, Florida. There was a disturbance going on in the house involving 52 year old, a 52 year old man and a 50 year old woman, Julissa Negron. The man said they got into an argument. They had been drinking some alcohol, but she was upset at some of the Instagram he was following.

[Brady]

Oh, she's thumbing through his gram.

[Brett]

I guess so. And that pissed her off so much she grabbed an item to beat him with it and it was a dildo. Clubbed him over the head a couple of times with it.

[Dick Toledo]

What brings you to the ER today?

[Brady]

Yeah, well, my wife Julissa and I was drinking and she beat me about the face and head with a dildo.

[Jonathan]

She beat me with King dong.

[Brady]

Yeah, I get king donged all over the house. Can we ask why? I'm following a lot of new AI ladies and she wasn't sure if they was real or not.

[Brett]

So describe Julissa Negron.

[Brady]

It'll surprise you, but I think she's fat and really, really White Julissa.

[Jonathan]

I might go with that one. It's a trick question.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's a trick question.

[Brett]

Fred says she's Puerto Rico.

[Brady]

Oh, she's Puerto Rican. Negron. Negron. Yeah, I guess maybe that's true.

[Dick Toledo]

I thought that might have been a married name.

[Jonathan]

Man, these elements are ugly.

[Brady]

Oh, that's the worst car in the world. Brady couldn't wait to show us that thing. Got it, drove it to work the next day.

[Brett]

Got the two tone silver, the goddamn.

[Michael Jackson]

Ronnie, a new bucket.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah? How's that? What'd you get?

[Michael Jackson]

It's out in the parking lot. You want to go see it?

[Dick Toledo]

Take us to lunch in it, Brady.

[Brady]

Where is it? Next to that lunchbox.

[Michael Jackson]

No, that's it. That's the car. It's sweet.

[Brett]

It is sweet.

[Michael Jackson]

It's got a hosable interior and a raised back seat.

[Brady]

Oh, it was so awful looking. Look at that.

[Jonathan]

There's the stadium.

[Brady]

Dumbest thing I've ever seen.

[Jonathan]

So it had suicide doors on the back?

[Brady]

Yeah, it swung back. Yeah. And I think Brady, much like when he bought that Outback with two sunroofs, had a big smile, thinking we'd all be impressed. And when he started making fun of it, he realized the error in his ways and just says, it's Ronnie's car.

[Dick Toledo]

I didn't realize the seats all the way laid back.

[Brady]

They had to. Yeah.

[Brett]

You have two little cots there.

[Brady]

The amount of hosing you were gonna do in there.

[Brett]

Camping, you know. We did a lot of camping.

[Brady]

Look at the ground. Looks like a garage floor.

[Brett]

Flip those side seats up.

[Brady]

Oh, couldn't wait to do that.

[Dick Toledo]

It does look like an enameled floor.

[Brett]

So handy, Brett.

[Brady]

And he got rid of it in three weeks because the ridicule was too mighty.

[Dick Toledo]

We didn't know it held a mope.

[Brady]

You can park up. You can park a real vehicle in it.

[Brett]

We had it longer than three weeks.

[Brady]

Not by choice. You wanted it out over a year.

[Dick Toledo]

Had to pay down that note.

[Brady]

I don't know about that.

[Michael Jackson]

Yeah, we're stuck with it for a little while.

[Brady]

It's great for drive ins and living in it.

[Michael Jackson]

The seats roll all the way down into beds because they assume you don't have a home.

[Dick Toledo]

Why would you need an rv?

[Brett]

I'm upset I didn't do what. What? They're showing those pictures. Flip everything up. I wish you.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah. You wish you'd have known that feature because that's functional. To have everything. But I never really.

[Dick Toledo]

The manual.

[Brett]

I didn't have to.

[Brady]

Why would you have Ever wanted to.

[Brett]

Maybe we did put a dresser in something.

[Brady]

You had an Avalanche. Why would you use that as the pickup?

[Brett]

Better gas mileage.

[Brady]

Oh, my God. None of this was because of good decision making.

[Brett]

More masculine than that.

[Dick Toledo]

You just, like, you'd like those Transformer cars because the Avalanche you could take.

[Brady]

Down the back for a little while. He was duped by terrible ideas in vehicles as the new thing.

[Dick Toledo]

Like, it's got a toaster in it.

[Brady]

That's dumb. They're never gonna use that toaster.

[Dick Toledo]

They were LEGO vehicles.

[Brady]

Yeah, the Lego, the one he bought that was all lego.

[Michael Jackson]

This thing's pretty sweet.

[Brady]

Like, it's LEGO car. You have a LEGO car and you.

[Brett]

Replaced this panel for me.

[Brady]

You replaced the LEGO car with an actual steel version of it, and it was much better.

[Jonathan]

What was the LEGO car?

[Brady]

An Avalanche.

[Brett]

The first Avalanche.

[Brady]

They were made of lego. A lot of everything on it was a plastic chunk.

[Michael Jackson]

And you can take them off and wash them in your house.

[Brady]

Like, why do you want to take your car apart so bad? Why is the selling feature of your vehicle more work?

[Michael Jackson]

You can hose the inside off.

[Brady]

What's going on at your place that the cars have so much on them? You have to disassemble them?

[Dick Toledo]

Not snowed by horsepower or engine. None of that size or anything like that.

[Michael Jackson]

It's got a straight four. That's what they're calling it. I don't even know what that is.

[Brett]

But it's new tech at Honda. It had over a hundred horsepower.

[Brady]

Yeah. And then the best thing about that car that had the stadium back seats, the reason it had stadium back seats, as it turns out, is so the back people in the backseat could also see the engine fire. Ah. All right, here we go.

[Brett]

Here's a band. Maybe we should have the U fest and put them on the list.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Brett]

It's quite entertaining.

[Brady]

It's a video of a part of one of them. Oh. Guy just whipping a girl on stage. And, I mean, he's not fooling around. She's pretty hot.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Listen to the miserable music they're playing. That's a live stage show. Is she bleeding or is that just a.

[Dick Toledo]

No, that's a rose on her.

[Brady]

Oh, it's a tattoo.

[Dick Toledo]

No. On her skirt.

[Brady]

Oh, it is a sister. That was a ripped open part of her skirt.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

She seemingly has a. Maybe there's some padding under there.

[Dick Toledo]

Got some good hip action.

[Brady]

Yeah. A little Shakira thing going on. Every time she gets whipped, that guy's direct, hitting that same spot over and over.

[Dick Toledo]

I Like the Darkness's new album.

[Brady]

Yeah, she's pretty good. Justin's onto something here.

[Brett]

The next one's Jalen. Hurts walking off the field of the Super Bowl.

[Brady]

No, that's a. I don't think so.

[Dick Toledo]

Against the Commanders.

[Brady]

Against the Washington. Yeah, somebody. They go through that little tunnel. Oh. The whole gate lets loose and all the fans fall out.

[Dick Toledo]

Look at the size.

[Brady]

Jalen just starts moving the guy around, picks him up. Would be a spinal injury.

[Brett]

Get in for a hug.

[Brady]

Oh. Get in here. My spine, Jalen, My spine. It's all right. You're gonna be all right. Well, that's dangerous. You could sue all of the Washington commanders.

[Brett]

The last one's a new one to the list. I don't know what's happening here.

[Brady]

Disease.

[Brett]

I think it's a burn or.

[Brady]

I don't know.

[Dick Toledo]

There's a lot going on.

[Michael Jackson]

Okay.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh, my sweet Christ. What disease is that? He looks like a piece of popcorn with teeth. Oh, my God. What's mom saying? Why is there just this monster music going on? That lady's trying to talk about her.

[Brett]

His name is Zade.

[Brady]

Zade is 21 years old. He goes to school, he has friends. He can speak and hear very well, walk on his own. His soul and mind are what's noteworthy. Who's getting to know him, to know he's got a good soul? I'm just running the other way, and that comes at me. That's a monster.

[Dick Toledo]

There's one I hadn't heard. I would rather be friends with him than with these edge lords in the comments.

[Brady]

I'm not friends with that at all. I dodged that dude like the plague. I'm not catching that accident happened when.

[Dick Toledo]

He was a little baby, around three years old. So he has been like this his whole life.

[Brady]

That made his teeth on the outside. That's not an accident. Apparently. It says, considering his situation, he's a very independent person. He better be. He's not going to be a group player anytime soon. Yikes.

[Dick Toledo]

He's got one of those Shawn Rockefeller phones.

[Brady]

What kind of accident makes your teeth go to the outside?

[Brett]

It is wild.

[Brady]

How do your teeth end up outside of your face? What accident is that? How does that happen? That's not an accident.

[Brett]

There's no possibility for a retainer at one particular time.

[Brady]

You couldn't at least buy that guy braces. It's just not worth it, Sean. It's too expensive. What? What? I mean, Zayd, Sean's our guy.

[Dick Toledo]

Given all your other treatments, we had to make a choice.

[Michael Jackson]

Uh, no.

[Brady]

How about some fake eyeballs?

[Michael Jackson]

No. We're not gonna spend a lot on you. You're not worth the trouble. There's no ROI here.

[Brady]

I was a little chlebotic with my teeth on the outside.

[Michael Jackson]

You're good. Stop smiling.

[Brady]

I'm not. I was tailor on the outside.

[Michael Jackson]

It was an accident. And then his teeth shot out of.

[Brady]

His face and landed on the front.

[Michael Jackson]

Of his face instead.

[Brett]

You know what we're gonna name him? Zade.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Here's the accident. A candle fell on his blankets when he was sleeping. 80% of his body was burned. 4th degree burns to be precise. He was 2 years old at the time. Lost his sight and both hands.

[Brady]

He lost more than that.

[Brett]

And that's the second one. The People magazine just did a spread on a guy that 80% of his body's burned. Maybe it's him had the total face transplant. It was the first one. 2020. And now he's married to some hot girl in their Instagram famous and she's.

[Brady]

Just in it for the click. I don't know. I've seen some people burned by fire and I don't remember their teeth going to the outside.

[Brett]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Brady]

98 kill you PD Holmberg's morning sickness. All right, that was weird. We can put that on Facebook and let other people be the judge of that.

[Brett]

The pacifier too long or something. I mean, those teeth are in my house.

[Brady]

When you suck your thumb and you're in a fire, maybe your teeth shoot out of you and start growing on the outside of your face.

[Dick Toledo]

His eyes are okay. He's waiting for a surgery technique to be developed so that surgeons can remove the scar tissue and let him see again.

[Brady]

There's eyes underneath all that skin.

[Dick Toledo]

He has limited vision.

[Brady]

Yeah, he does. What am I looking at there?

[Brett]

Well, he has no vision there because.

[Brady]

His eyes have grown over where eyes go. There's eyes in there.

[Dick Toledo]

That's what someone's. That's what the cut them open once. Are saying.

[Brady]

Cut me, Mick. Cut him.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, I'm not well.

[Brett]

You need.

[Brady]

There's eyes inside of the grown over silly putty bubbles.

[Dick Toledo]

Apparently part of the procedure to protect what side he had when he was young. They. They closed over.

[Brady]

Well, it's been 20 years.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, let's.

[Brett]

You know how bright that's going to be?

[Brady]

Oh my God. That's a. That's probably his biggest concern.

[Brett]

Lights and cones too bright.

[Brady]

Put it back. No, it's not the brightness that's going to Be awful. It's when he opens his eyes and sees that his teeth are on the outside now.

[Brett]

Man, he could.

[Brady]

Would you ever open that guy's eyes? He didn't want to see this.

[Brett]

Put him on there. I'd slap some of those meta glasses on there.

[Brady]

He does not want to see this.

[Jonathan]

In one aspect, he's lucky. I mean, as far as, like, he. So he can't see it.

[Brady]

Right. I ever had my teeth start growing on the outside of my face. Glue my eyes shut, too. It's already hard enough. Look in the mirror. Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

What we have here is a struggle.

[Brady]

I'm the mom. And. And then he sees. And then he says what Brady said to his mom. What? Couldn't spend the 4, 500 bucks on braces? He couldn't help me out at least a little bit. Put my teeth back in my head.

[Brett]

Maybe that one's coming up. A little surgery there.

[Brady]

How'd you like to be the dentist when he rolls up every six months for cleaning orthodontist.

[Dick Toledo]

He doesn't have to open up. John, it is work.

[Brady]

It's basic work for the dentist.

[Jonathan]

Just gets a garden hose.

[Brady]

Do the suction thing and just let it fall out.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, just put a tray under.

[Brady]

You put a tray under?

[Brett]

I mean, I know he doesn't know, but my last lore request was like, do we have to have the open nose? Can we just seal that one up?

[Brady]

Can't we put a little, I don't know, foundation on that big, red open nose? There's an awful lot of. Don't open his eyes for. I know people hate when I say it, but it's time for the pillow. Little pillow talk with Zade. I was gonna tell you a story before bedtime. Yeah, I'm gonna tell you a story right before bedtime. It's the story of the boy with teeth on the outside and how he couldn't breathe with a pillow on his head. Okay, that sounds great.

[Brett]

Becky, you'll be taking on Jade.

[Michael Jackson]

Bachelor number two, when you were a baby.

[Brady]

Oh, God. Don't talk about easy jokester.

[Dick Toledo]

All right, let's bring him out.

[Michael Jackson]

Bachelor number two, what are your biggest fears?

[Brett]

Fire, candles.

[Brady]

Candlelight. Levad. Candlelight in the bed. Candlelight burn.

[Michael Jackson]

Baby, you're fun and mysterious.

[Brady]

Oh, God.

[Michael Jackson]

Bachelor number two, last time you had oral sex, what happened?

[Brady]

She died. She dies.

[Jonathan]

That's like a piranha.

[Brett]

That's the instant deal breaker there. If they're on. The profile says love can't like dinners out, out.

[Michael Jackson]

Oh, he killed his last date with Oral sex sounds hot.

[Brady]

Not hot. Hot. Bad. No hot. No oral sex. No hot.

[Michael Jackson]

I'm a dental hygienist.

[Brady]

Oh, thank.

[Michael Jackson]

Bad breath is one of my biggest pet peeves.

[Brady]

Bad dust. Click. Bashful number three.

[Brett]

Zay, do you want to do some cocaine?

[Brady]

Pour it in my open nose. Sometimes I look cocaine. I don't even try to look cocaine.

[Jonathan]

Isn't he Astraz Got a funnel.

[Brady]

I just did the cocaine. It fell in my open nose hole. Brady, would you take him to dinner? Yeah, you could still eat sitting across from that. Not me.

[Jonathan]

Imagine the food falling out of his mouth while you're eating potatoes.

[Brady]

Mashed potatoes or baked potatoes.

[Brett]

You'd have to do. Yeah, Lick. I think mashed potatoes. I don't think you could. There's not much chewing going on there.

[Brady]

I don't know. I think it's. I think it's inevitably going to get chewed. It has to pass through that gauntlet of teeth.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't think his teeth hit each other.

[Brett]

Yeah, they're not functional.

[Brady]

The back couple too. I don't know. He might be able to crack a carrot.

[Brett]

I think it made me crack the carrot.

[Jonathan]

Looks like a bottle opener.

[Brady]

Human bottle opener.

[Brett]

It's like feeding the elephant.

[Brady]

Brett and I were searching all day for a bottle opener. There. Could have used this guy. Ow. Sorry, Zade. But really, seriously, that's what you're good for. No, no, you don't get any beer. Oh, crying. Yeah, we'll put some in your. In your holes. Yeah, you put it down. You put it down. I'm not one of those people that finds beauty in keeping that stuff around. I am a beautiful soul. No soul can be as so beautiful that it makes me erase all this. I gotta have to say. Okay, I don't want to hear it. Just like a bird at night. Just put a sheet over him, go to sleep. Thanks for bringing us, Zade Brady.

[Brett]

Welcome, Zade. Yeah, the program.

[Brady]

I wonder if on his Instagram he takes pictures from on high to make him look thinner or to make it look like his teeth are a little bit less outside.

[Jonathan]

He's got the Rocky Dennis funhouse mirror.

[Michael Jackson]

You've always have your eyes closed. How romantic.

[Brady]

That's not my choice. Cause I glue them shut with fire.

[Michael Jackson]

Oh, I'm on fire for you, Zayd.

[Brady]

Don't say you are.

[Jonathan]

Wasn't your old intern's eyes, like, covered up too?

[Brady]

Yeah, but when his eyes got plopped out by God's cancer diagnosis when he was three, because God gave him cancer early on, his eye sockets Grew a pink, thin, almost like. It was almost the same color as a fruit roll up on where your eyes used to be. But there were two pins inside there.

[Brett]

They're like praying, man aside.

[Brady]

Yeah, they're like little fingers inside.

[Jonathan]

So they still, like, moved around and stuff then.

[Brady]

And they would move the thin fruit roll up skin around like someone was trying. Like, Jacob's ladder, like somebody's trying to get out. We asked him. Jim Sharp, to his credit, told Jason he had to wear glasses. Because how come, Jason, if you want to start doing public appearances, no one can look at you? It's very hard to look at you. Well, that's their problem. No, it's the radio station's problem. We're toting you around, making everybody sick. It's time you heard.

[Michael Jackson]

How come I have to change my ways.

[Brady]

Cause you're a freak. And people are disturbed by your face. With those little fingers in your eyes, you can't see it, so you don't know how bad it is.

[Michael Jackson]

I can't.

[Brady]

We know why it happened, Jason. Here, let me introduce you to Zade. Zade, do you like to French kiss? I might, but you're gonna hate it. You're gonna bury my tafunta all 32. Anyway, Brett, what do you got on the big screen?

[Jonathan]

I got nothing today. I got standards.

[Brady]

You can't top Zade.

[Jonathan]

No, I can't. I got standards, and I got nothing on that.

[Brady]

You know, there's those moments where you raised your daughter right, you know, I raised a good girl, and she's not into material things, and then you wish you didn't the second she brings Zade home. Cause he's got a beautiful soul.

[Michael Jackson]

I see right past it.

[Brady]

Ah, you wrecking our Facebook family. Facebook's go. I can't send this picture of you two over to. Damn it.

[Jonathan]

Like, I send a family photo on the Christmas cards and stuff.

[Brady]

Well, it's like my cousin who married that Scotsman with no neck and his neck removed surgically. Pretty cool, if you're into that. I don't know him. He's, like, supposedly a wonderful human being, but it's not like he could be a dick, you know? No, he's got to be pretty nice to everybody because he can't see anybody coming.

[Brett]

What's it gonna look like, Doc? After?

[Brady]

Yeah, it's gonna look like your head is buried in the middle of your chest.

[Brett]

You look like an exaggerated lineman in football.

[Brady]

Yeah, I don't know if you ever, like, broke a head off of a stuffed animal and tried to Put it right back on top. It's never quite the same. That's you now. All right. Thanks for popping by.

[Dick Toledo]

Next.

[Brady]

Zade, do you want to come in here? I've got no neck. I can't see when people are coming from left, right to behind. I don't know. I didn't even know that was a surgery until I saw this guy. You can have your neck removed.

[Brett]

You did.

[Brady]

I'm afraid we're gonna have to amputate. What? I came in here for a sore neck? Exactly. I could have my neck taken off.

[Brett]

Taking some columns out.

[Brady]

I'm taking the whole thing out. Just gonna rest your chin on your clavicle. You'll be all right. At least you're not Zayed at the at least you're not Zayed clinic. That's true. It could be worse. I could be Zayed and have my teeth on the outside. The worst thing you can say to my cousin's husband is, hey, it's good to see you. Have a look around. Because he can't. He just starts spinning like a top. I love your house. Does a full 360 walk. What great big room. People could sneak up on you from everywhere in here. Is that. You worry about that everywhere, don't you? Oh, you know it.

[Dick Toledo]

Boy, do I.

[Brady]

Do I ever. I'm fairly linear in sight. I want to chew. I almost break my ribs.

[Dick Toledo]

Brad, we might have to save your videos for tomorrow.

[Brady]

No, he's already done. It's 8. 29. Is Jamie here? Yeah, this is a good one. This is a great get. Today he's over at Scottsdale center for the Arts. Correct? Yeah. And somehow Saturday, I believe, tied to our guys. Yep.

[Dick Toledo]

They were involved in helping him out.

[Brady]

Jamie Lisso is going to be here in a little bit. He's on Gutfeld all the time. It's 829. There goes your Brady report. It's 98. It's out of control now. 98. KUPD.