Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Dave Attell In Studio

Episode: 02-13-26 - Dave Attell - Stand Up Live - IN Studio
Date: February 13, 2026
Host: John Holmberg (with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo)
Guest: Dave Attell

Main Theme/Purpose

This episode centers on comedian Dave Attell’s visit to promote his shows at Stand Up Live in Phoenix over Valentine’s and President’s Day weekend. The conversation is a humorous, free-ranging back-and-forth covering topics from relationships and history to dementia, artificial intelligence, the comedy world, and life on the road. True to the show’s style, the hosts and Attell blend observational comedy, personal anecdotes, and absurd musings, delivering both laughs and unexpected depth.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Dave Attell as the Accidental Valentine’s Spokesperson

• [01:22] Attell jokes about his role as a romantic figure for Stand Up Live's Valentine's shows:
  "For my shows, only the broken, broken. Well, that's almost all of us." (Dave Attell)
• He admits he has no idea how he always ends up performing on "coupley holidays" like Valentine’s.

2. Historical Humor: Assassination of Garfield

• [02:37] They riff on obscure presidential history, particularly President James Garfield’s assassination.
• Attell mock-laments the forgotten president and the bearded suspects depicted in the Netflix documentary.
  • Memorable quote: "If you ever wondered what the Taliban would look like if they wore suits – well, there you go." (Attell, [03:19])
• Holmberg adds: "Garfield's the most forgotten shot guy ever." ([03:46])

3. Carriage Rides and Romance in Phoenix

• [04:36] Attell and Holmberg debate the romantic potential of carriage rides in downtown Phoenix, concluding that donkeys (burros) are the “jeep of the equine family” ([04:53]).
• They joke about the impracticality of horses surviving Arizona summers.

4. Dave Attell’s Personal Life and Family, Dementia Care

• [05:49] - [06:56] Attell opens up about caring for his mother with dementia, recounting a stressful New Year’s Eve ER trip:
  • "I'm the most spoiled...We had toys, we went on vacations...I feel very spoiled." (Attell, [05:44])
  • "You know how hard it is to get out of the city on New Year's Eve? It's like a drunk driving festival." ([06:24])
• He describes his experiences improvising conversations with his mother and the challenges of dementia caregiving:
  • "It's all improv...They don't remember anything...you gotta roll with whatever's going on." (Attell, [17:12]-[17:49])
  • "My mom's still sweet. Some people get angry...they have Sundown syndrome." (Attell, [17:44])

5. Winter Weather and City Life

• [06:58] - [08:27] Attell contrasts winter in New York (burying cars in snow) to Arizona’s aridity and marvels at cultural differences, including snow removal and landscapers' leaf blowers.
• They muse about Arizona's lack of interest in the cold and how locals “would figure it out.”

6. Football, Halftime Shows, and the Absurdity of Entertainment

• [08:29] - [09:53] The group discusses a recent football game, emphasizing the unheralded art of punting.
• Holmberg jokes: “It would be like if they took a porn and edited it and put it on TNT.” ([08:54])
• Attell suggests halftime entertainers should have to play in the game, imagining Bad Bunny suited up for both teams ([09:27]).

7. The Comedy World and Theme Park Fantasies

• [10:20] - [12:02] Attell fantasizes about a “Haunted Comedy Club” theme park, where comics work as themselves. Nate Bargatze, comic and friend, is highlighted as someone “who could sell tickets to anything.”
  • "I want to get a job at that theme park, as a Dave Attell." (Attell, [10:37])
• The hosts riff on the artificial smiles of theme park mascots and minor league entertainers.

8. Musing on Automation and AI

• [18:00] - [19:06] Conversation turns to self-driving cars (Waymo):
  • "It’s weird to see something that just is built to drive… there’s nothing else, just A to B, fight with this AI." (Attell, [18:07])
  • "I think we can all agree we’ve seen guys go in, but we haven’t seen anyone come out. It’s the portal." (Holmberg, [18:40])

9. Post-Apocalyptic Skillset Jokes

• [19:06] - [20:44] If comedy disappeared, Attell imagines running a “barter town,” while Holmberg doubts his own survivability.
• Attell contemplates being a professional dog walker but complains about the challenges of pampered NYC dogs and doggie daycares:
  • "There’s fraud going on. Dog fraud." (Attell, [20:44])

10. Standup, Skank Fest, and Unusual Comedy Venues

• [21:21] - [23:44] The group recounts odd comedy clubs (strip club + miners’ helmets in the Midwest) and Attell’s experience at Skank Fest New Orleans:
  • "I'm old. Doug [Stanhope] was there also...They had a Ferris wheel...the best part was like...they had two guys going at it with a taser." (Attell, [22:26]-[23:40])
• Attell describes wild festival events: boxing rings, live podcasts, and taser fighting.
  • "It was like MMA with a taser. Old school." (Attell, [23:40])

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [03:19] "If you ever wondered what the Taliban would look like if they wore suits – well, there you go. You got it right there." — Dave Attell
• [05:44] "I'm the most spoiled...We had toys, we went on vacations...I feel very spoiled." — Dave Attell
• [06:24] "You know how hard it is to get out of the city on New Year's Eve? It's like a drunk driving festival." — Dave Attell
• [08:54] "It would be like if they took a porn and edited it and put it on TNT." — John Holmberg
• [10:37] "I want to get a job at that theme park as a Dave Attell." — Dave Attell
• [17:12] "It's all improv...They don't remember anything...you gotta roll with whatever's going on." — Dave Attell
• [18:40] "I think we can all agree we’ve seen guys go in, but we haven’t seen anyone come out. It’s the portal." — John Holmberg
• [20:44] "There’s fraud going on. Dog fraud." — Dave Attell
• [24:23] Words of Wisdom from Dave Attell:
  "Sure, you can sit at home and watch clicks all day long, but don't you want to experience it live? Don't you want to smell it? Don't you want to suck it in? Well, then you got to come down to these shows, whether it's me..."

Important Timestamps & Segments

• [01:22] – Dave Attell introduced; Valentine's humor
• [02:37] – Presidential history riff (Garfield’s assassination)
• [05:49] – Attell on childhood, family vacations, and dementia caregiving
• [09:27] – The “halftime entertainers must play in the game” bit
• [10:37] – Comedy theme park concept
• [17:12] – Dementia improv and caregiving wisdom
• [18:07] – Musings on AI and driverless cars
• [20:44] – “Dog fraud” and NYC dog daycare skepticism
• [21:21] – Weird comedy club stories; Skank Fest tales
• [24:23] – Attell’s “words of wisdom” on live comedy

Tone & Style

The episode is fast-paced, sardonic, and sharply observant, with Attell’s deadpan wit and the hosts’ irreverent banter driving the energy. One-liners abound, and even heavier subjects (like caring for a parent with dementia) are treated with vulnerability, wit, and a kind of resigned warmth.

Conclusion

This episode is a strong example of comedian camaraderie, featuring Dave Attell’s signature mix of morose humor and absurd observations. For listeners, it offers comedy industry insight, a celebration of oddball history, reflections on family, and a reminder that sometimes it’s best to roll with life’s improv, both onstage and off.

Recommended for: Fans of stand-up, comedy insiders, and anyone who enjoys clever, dark banter with the occasional deep cut—plus Arizonans who want a taste of Attell’s latest material before his live shows.