Episode Overview
Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona
Episode Title: KISS 1230s DJ Easy Dick Takes Final Calls From Listener Named Bacon And Others
Date: February 13, 2026
Host(s): John Holmberg, with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
In this playful, irreverent episode, John Holmberg and the crew revive the character of DJ Easy Dick, taking calls from listeners to riff on their Valentine’s Day plans. The segment is heavy on tongue-in-cheek humor, rapid-fire improvisation, and the kind of offbeat banter that regularly marks HMS. The team interacts with listeners “Cory,” “Josh,” “Cranston,” and notable caller “Bacon,” spinning their romantic plans into comedic set-pieces.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. Corey’s Solo Valentine’s Days ([02:00]–[04:44])
- Holmberg interviews longtime listener Corey about his (lack of) Valentine’s Day plans. The bit playfully pokes fun at romantic misadventures, awkward dates, and low-key loneliness.
- Corey's last dates:
- Solo last year and this year; two years ago was just a “movie day.”
- Cory admits, “It didn’t really pan out.”
- Memorable past date: Olive Garden, with Holmberg razzing: “The tour of Italy. Nothing fancy at all. I wonder why he didn't get a second Valentine's Day.” ([03:16])
- Holmberg takes running comedic shots about Corey's pace (“By the time he finally got to the driver’s seat, she had died. They cooked her inside the car.” [04:13])
- Corey jokes: “They usually get tired of waiting halfway through,” when asked if he opens the car door for dates. ([04:05])
- Corey's last dates:
2. Listener Call: Josh aka “Bacon” and Seema Bacon ([04:58]–[08:47])
- Josh/Bacon shares his plan to take long-term partner Seema Bacon to Fogo de Chao, prompting a wide-ranging, bawdy roast about love, meat, and lengthy relationships.
- Holmberg on the buffet: “You gotta take a girl to a buffet and get her belly full so you can hear that moving around when you're pumping her from behind…Try to ignore the tears.” ([05:23])
- Seema Bacon’s name provides ample comedic fuel:
- “When you put it that way, it makes her vagina, like, turn gray immediately?” ([06:19])
- Bacon discusses their long-term relationship (25 years). Tension between gentle roasting and affectionate ribbing is a running theme.
- Cory provides unsolicited advice: “Every 30 pounds gets you an extra inch, by the way.” ([07:20])
- Holmberg: “Brady, you could have a 40 inch dick by the end of the year. That’s pretty impressive.” ([07:29])
- Bacon recalls meeting Seema at Trails department store while in college ([07:43]).
3. Playful Banter on Valentine’s Plans ([08:47]–[11:16])
- Brief check-in with Brady, who admits he bought his partner Grater’s ice cream for Valentine’s.
- Holmberg: “Brady. Are you dressed like a woman in the mirror, handing yourself a present?” ([09:41])
- Cranston calls in, describing a sunset cruise with his girlfriend on the Dolly Steamboat and deadpans about "abandoning her" to trade up for a younger partner ([10:13]–[10:57]).
4. DJ Easy Dick's Sendoff and Final Antics ([11:16]–[13:35])
- Holmberg continues with tongue-in-cheek radio DJ stereotypes, riffing on possible events:
- “For the easy, easy fee. Get me a K Momo gift card and some raisin canes and you're gonna have yourself a weekend with Thriller.” ([11:46])
- Reference to a “Valentine’s Day super special for couples” and local events, with a quick plug for a fictional Magic Johnson theater.
- Corey’s family gets a mention, with playful shots about his parent’s reproductive timeline:
- “Four months from now you’ll have a brother.”
- “The gestation period of Cory’s mother is about six months. It’s a little bit less than a baseball season.” ([12:53])
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
Holmberg: “Did she swallow them whole?”
Corey: “No, she's not a pelican.”
Holmberg: “Well, she would have been a better date if she was.” ([03:37]) -
Holmberg to Bacon: “You had sex with this elderly beast…Was she aware of it?” ([06:34]–[06:38])
-
Holmberg: “Every 30 pounds gets you an extra inch.”
Corey: “You lose 30 and you gain an inch back.”
Holmberg: “Thank you, Cory. Brady, you could have a 40 inch dick by the end of the year.” ([07:23]–[07:29]) -
Holmberg riffing on relationships: “Nobody wants to see a vagina age for 25 years…put that [meat] outside for 25 years and see what you think of it when it’s done.” ([08:59]–[09:09])
-
Holmberg, parodying DJ signoffs: “I don’t wanna be on you. No, you can be right on top of me. I’ll cuck from underneath.” ([11:51])
Timestamps for Important Segments
- [02:00] – Corey discusses his single Valentine’s Days and awkward dates
- [04:58] – Josh ("Bacon") calls in, introducing the Seema Bacon saga
- [07:43] – The story of how Bacon and Seema met at Trails department store
- [09:30] – Brady reveals his Valentine’s gift: Grater’s ice cream
- [10:13] – Cranston’s “sunset cruise” plans and jokes about dumping his aging partner
- [11:34] – Holmberg/DJ Easy Dick’s DJ antics and humorous event suggestions
Tone and Style Highlights
- Irreverent & spontaneous: The humor is edgy, not for the easily offended, with plenty of raunchy, sarcastic playfulness.
- Conversational: The banter among hosts and callers is fast, sometimes overlapping, and always veering into unpredictable jokes.
- Loose radio bit: Plenty of breaking character, meta-commentary, and mock DJ radio tropes.
Summary
This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness leans into its hallmark brand of brash, freewheeling comedy, using Valentine’s Day as a theme to riff on the quirks and foibles of relationships—be they new, old, or nonexistent. Corey's lonely tales set the tone, Josh/Bacon’s long-term love and its “gray” realities get the full roast, and callers like Cranston serve up additional setups for the panel’s delightfully outlandish punchlines. DJ Easy Dick’s segment is a reminder that sometimes, the best way to celebrate love is to laugh at it—loudly, and together.
