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Dick Toledo
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Brady
THANKS. Miles to nowhere on the day that we're just going step by step, folks. We're just trying to figure it out. Thanks to all the EMT people out there and minor concern that is coming through my emails right now about me dying. Kelly's worried. Kelly says, dude, you're not your normal smooth self. You need to get your dome checked out. You're reaching. I can hear it in your voice. Like, it's hard for you to. Anyway, I'm fine. I just told you there was something wrong. So you're listening differently. And he goes, okay, I'm just concerned. Like, ah, you're right. I'm just playing with you. I'm probably dying. Could be a thing. I do like that. Revel Hollingsworth, one of our favorite named listeners emailed in Here are the 3N words necessary for Kanye to move forward in a relationship. And I'm like, what? She must be nonverbal, Nazi and naked at all times. And I'm like, well, that's.
Derek Zellner
That's Kanye.
Brady
That's Kanye's type. He's got a type. Good luck. And if you're one of her friends, like, she comes to you and says, I don't know where it all went wrong. Can I get you a blanket? Like, why are you here? Go put some clothes on.
Derek Zellner
Oh, don't.
Brady
If I'm one of her friends. No, but I mean, if you're like a girlfriend of hers and she comes over and she just wants to talk.
Derek Zellner
Let's not get carried away.
Brady
I just don't, I don't understand what's happening. Another thing, I don't understand what's happening, but it can't be good. My alma mater, Dobson High School's got some stuff going on. Their football coach got arrested, right? He's been arrested again.
Derek Zellner
Not dj.
Brady
Oh, no, there's. This never happened before. Don't you even start what do you mean again, Brady? Do you. Are you saying again as if there has been a coach in the past for football that has been arrested from Dobson High School? You are an insane person to even try that. That was a great coach, Mike Clark. And Coach Clark is not. Oh, here you go. Now you've done it. Now you've done it. Here he comes. Shoot. You suck. You said I've been arrested. Suck you, Brady. Suck off. Suck you and your sucking family. Shoot. I don't know what's going on over here. That's right. You should be sorry. Gosh darn it. Shoot.
Derek Zellner
How's DZ doing there, Coach DZ?
Brady
All praise all hell. DZ never understood why Kanye liked Hitler so much when DZ was available to worship. DZ's wife's naked all the time because, you know, clothes just fly off of her. When DZ is not even in her control. He walks in a room. DZ walks. Derek Zellner walks in a room. Shoot. Everybody's getting arrested for indecent exposure. Only one that wouldn't is dz, because that is called decent exposure. When he whips it out, you just bow down. You're in the presence of greatness. Shoot his D. Come on. You'd be so lucky for it to feed. You'd be like a baby birds getting nutrients you've never had before since Mama's teeth. Brady, you take it back right now. Saying anything about coaches adopts in high school ever be ever even coming close. Being arrested for tomfoolery and such, that is just crazy for you even bring it up.
Freddy
I'd like to apologize.
Brady
Do it then. Shoot. Be a man. Sack up, son. Also like to congratulate the Arizona Prep College. College prep. Is that what's called Arizona College Prep Tour Academy?
Derek Zellner
Yeah, something like that.
Brady
For their ten straight state championships. They're gonna win now. Shoot. They just hired DZ as their head coach. Sorry, Gilbert. Might as well just burn it down.
Freddy
They're not led by Ricky Strump.
Brady
Little Ricky Strump eats up the garbage just as equal to anybody else. Even the great dz, who should be bronzed or dipped in gold. Shoot. Shoot. Suck you, Brett Gilbert. Tiger. You guys didn't. Hey, this is for all the parents out there. Gilbert, why don't you go suck yourselves? How in the world did you guys let DZ slip through the cracks? Dumb sucks. Shoot. Coach Clark has to fix this every time. DZ is now going to travel. You're gonna notice it. Like a skylink rocket getting launched at Vandenberg. Air Force Base. People are gonna look in the sky and say what in the world is flying? It's DZ's aura moving from Gilbert over to that Arizona Preparatory Schools. I don't know how far the trip is, but DZ is the man. He's gonna be the one to get you there. So congratulations. All other schools you can just pack up your helmets and your shoulder pads, drop them off at the Arizona College Preparatory Academy because you're not gonna be needing those.
Derek Zellner
How long till DZ takes over the Arizona Cardinals?
Brady
Well, rumor has it he already has. But he can't play all 11 positions and that's been a problem. They had him up to nine point and they try to run a play for 11 players. And the other two guys just got in DZ's way. So as it stands right now, DZ did all the blocking, snapping, throwing, running, catching, tackling, kicking. But you get that last two guys just in the way. And they were just too selfish. Let DZ do it all by himself. So by the way, I want to say thanks President Trump for going out there. Shoot, he got dz. He just flew over to Hamas and he's cleared the area there. They're going to rebuild a lot of that Gaza structure thanks to DZ's ideas. And then he. He got those hostages. They. They got sent home. DZ on his back. Flew him with his big winged arms. Suck. Brady.
Freddy
Thanks for coming in, Coach.
Brady
Tell me Dobson High School coaches are getting arrested. You don't know what it was like trying to BabySIT DZ for four years. State championship. Only one Dobson ever had. And you know what was what's common denominator? Dobson High School's 40 year existence in their one state championship.
Derek Zellner
DZ.
Brady
That's right. Derek Zellner was a quarterb. That's all it took. We should have retired the. The sucking program right after that. Suck sucking kids coming around here trying to be like dz. Just shut her down. Anyway Gilbert. Torch your. Torch your stupid school right now. Because there ain't no reason for anybody to ever go play football there again. It's just sad. You're gonna slip in your own tears on that football field. It's always gonna be a muddy track. Shoot. All right, I'm out of here.
Freddy
See ya.
Brady
Congrats tz. Red.
Freddy
Freddy.
Brady
Yeah, that's right. Red for Ed. That's right I say DZ for Ed. We just hired DZ to teach your kids all the rights and wrongs. Put them on a zoom screen like that. Big brother. Have your kids Sit in a room and just absorb your presence. Arizona College Preparatory Academy just won another state championship while we were talking. Wow. Just shut the door on myself. I gotta go. Might have a concussion. Gee, that's a great coach. Clark Brady. How dare you. Their new coach though just got arrested on the campus and it's not good. It can't be good. It can't be good. When the cops show up to school and pick you up and they say that he was. I don't know what it is. Says he was arrested on campus Thursday by surprise police. What campus though? Dobson. Had to be.
Derek Zellner
But why would surprise police drive all. I don't know.
Freddy
Something happened up in Surprise.
Brady
Well, yeah. Why would surprise come get him? But they came and got him and they're not really saying why.
Derek Zellner
It's like a half assed story.
Brady
It's not much of a story at all. They said that the Dobson High School head football coach was arrested and then gives like his resume. He was the baseball coaching staff. He was on that for junior varsity. He teaches PE and credit recovery programs. There's kids with credit that need he does. He fixes credit in the high school. That's not good. If your credit's already garbage and you're at Dobson High, you're not coming out of it.
Freddy
Teach them how to get into it.
Brady
How to get bad credit. Yeah, that's called Dobson High graduate. You're gonna have bad credit called Westwood. Yeah, yeah. You end up at Westwood. You don't need credit at Westwood. They just have the drug recovery program. Yeah, you're not recovering from it. It's just how to get your drugs back after you sold them. It's an old Irish trick anyway. Yeah. The recovery program evidently is something that allows kids to make up failed classes. That's just do overs. Anyway, he was arrested by the surprise police department on campus. And the principal says they're understanding it doesn't involve the Mesa Public School students. He was immediately placed on administrative leave and continue to do so. So my alma mater's got a thing then. It says that he holds a fingerprint clearance through the Arizona Department of Public Safety.
Derek Zellner
See it?
Freddy
They might have now what does that mean?
Derek Zellner
21 Jump street or something?
Brady
Yeah, he might be Jump street head coach. He just liked it so much he got promoted a bunch of times. Like I'll stay. Why would he have fingerprint clearance through the Department of Public Safety?
Derek Zellner
I don't even know what that means.
Brady
I don't either. When do they take your finger plate and you just go in and out of jails and stuff. I don't know what that is either. Either way. Mustang pride at an all time high. And some sad news that just broke a little bit ago. The drummer for Corey Feldman's band has passed away, Duke Gad, of a fentanyl overdose.
Freddy
Oh, geez.
Brady
Yeah. Feldman announced the death instead on cdog22 on his Instagram. And his name was. His name was Gad. Duke Gad. And Corey said something, said he was the legendary. He was the son of legendary percussionist Steve Gadda. Do you know who that is?
Derek Zellner
No.
Brady
Me neither. But that's evidently something that Corey selling says he was poisoned by his own struggles in life and died too young. So I don't know if this changes anything, but I can tell you this wasn't a very good drummer. I hate speak ill as a head, but that dude was. Cory's drumming live. The situation there was not so great.
Derek Zellner
He was. His dad was a studio musician, so he played with Simon Garfunkel, James Taylor, Chuck Mangione, Clapton.
Brady
He was just kind of a guy in the studio that would fill. The one thing that was laughable at a lot of Corey shows was the. The percussion, the time. And then Corey takes over the drum kit for a song, Stand by Me, which originally drum solo has no drums. He plays drums on a song that doesn't have drums. And that's when old Duke Gad takes a break and does Fentanyl, evidently. So it's a constant stream of sadness, this Corey Feldman thing. Every time he's about to come back, somebody either leaves the band, divorces him, or in this case, now they've lost somebody.
Freddy
There's so many ways you can leave that band.
Brady
Yeah. And you know what? Let's just say congratulations to Duke Gad. You're out. You're in a better place. That's right. I don't believe he probably feels that way. A lot of people say that when someone dies, well, he's in a better place now. This is the first time I actually believe that's true. Holmberg's morning sickness. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that? Holmberg's morning sickness. You're in a much better place now. No matter what it is.
Freddy
If there's an afterlife or fans anymore.
Brady
If you're in laptop not firing up in the ground and there is no afterlife, you're still in a better place than on stage with Corey Feldman, than the sea Dog. Sea Dog 22 on Instagram, if you want to follow. Because he's the Sea dog. The sea dog.
Derek Zellner
I'd go to see for sure.
Brady
Oh, yeah, no, the C. Definitely. Yeah, he's the C word, Cory, is there's no doubt about it. And then I saw this story last night, and it got real confused. We're all talking about whether Russia's gonna. Russia tried to bomb Chernobyl last night or date yesterday. So they. There's dudes who, like, kind of hang out at Chernobyl, make sure everything's all right. But they have a. They call IT storage unit 4, where all of the stuff that still could leak out to people is in this big, like, casing.
Freddy
Didn't they, like, dome it off?
Brady
Yeah, they've got it. Well, not the whole thing. Yeah, but they did dome up some stuff. They put it in the ground, and then they put this stuff over it to kind of protect the fact that there's nothing they can do with all this potential nuclear crap that could get into the air and just bring Chernobyl back to normal.
Derek Zellner
Bombing their own country, so.
Brady
Well, no, Russia bombed Ukraine. Chernobyl's in Ukraine. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So. But they tried to throw a bomb at it, and there's four dudes that live there all the time. I've done Google map searches of Chernobyl. Fascinating. Because it's like, there's lines like the no people zone. You're not allowed in there still. But there's There. They allow, like, special permitted people to go in and investigate.
Freddy
Telling me about the. The dogs.
Brady
There's a bunch of dogs at Chernobyl.
Freddy
Like, mutated a little bit.
Brady
A little. They. They survive off things. And they're showing that they're full of radiation and fine. And they're worried, like, that. That mutation. They're actually thinking maybe that this mutation might be beneficial to us. Not that we would mutate, but we can take something out of them. Also could be completely harmful. So they're just letting it. They're letting it play out, but it grew back super green. So they're doing tests, but there's guys there. So Russia tries to throw a missile into that, what they have there, which would just be catastrophic if it. If it went off and blew up what they wanted to blow up. So that got announced yesterday, and I'm like, oh, that's terrifying that Russia's really trying to just. They're trying to win this war. And then the very next story was that at a Ukrainian zoo, a sheep and a cat are best friends. And I'm sitting there like, well, then things aren't that bad. In Ukraine, if the zoos are still open. I mean, if. I don't know if Mexico completely went after New Mexico. And I'm not all against the idea of destroying New Mexico, but we had some. Let's say Al Qaeda takes over Mexico and starts to bomb Tucson. I'm pretty sure that the Christie's Zoo's gonna close for a little bit. We're not just one. And what kind of American are you that your country is in peril from being taken over by terrible. And you're like, well, there's still the zoo on the weekends of kids. No. You grab guns and you go down, you start fighting, you keep them back. Right. I know it's not the whole country, but even if New York is being bombarded, we here in Phoenix, are we going to the zoo still? Are we still hanging out? Oh, isn't this adorable? A squirrel. That's water skiing. Doesn't make sense to me. We're doing cutesy stories at the Ukrainian zoo. That's not where we should be focused.
Freddy
Back then when, you know, the, you know, like during World War II, when France was in. And, like, if there were zoos in the other towns.
Brady
Right. Do they stay open?
Freddy
I think they would. I mean, because they're not really hitting. You know, you think about certain cities that never got bombed, but we were.
Brady
Rationing food here in World War II.
Freddy
Yeah. They had zoo. Not only that metal.
Brady
Here's the other thing. The Odessa Zoo in Ukraine was having a Couple of the Year contest, and they named the cat and sheep Couple of the Year because the cat sleeps on the sheep's back. And I'm like, if you want us to feel sorry for Ukraine, don't do Couple of the Year. You know, Internet stories. It doesn't seem so bad because right now I'm thinking to myself, all right, well, then let Russia have that part and go to where the open zoo is with a cute cat and a sheep. Everything seems all right. That doesn't seem so awful. Like, all I picture, Ukraine is just constantly bombarded by Russia. Yeah.
Freddy
You think about it, if, you know, if we are at war with someone and someone bombed Florida, we're all going, but are we shutting down the Wildlife World Zoo?
Brady
We're certainly not. Like, we're not going to send out a message to the rest of the world. Ukraine can't function like we're under siege. This is terrible. And then, oh, by the way, if you want to enter the contest for zoo's cutest couple, we're holding that online, too. No, there's no, like, there's no happy page of the paper anymore. You don't click on quirky fun animal news in Ukraine. You're not naming snowplows and like, no, like every bit of like, they did that in World War II. Here it's all of our resources went towards, like you said, like metal and like if we could save it. And we're doing this. It's a rationing. It's fairly adorable picture though, the cat loves the sheep very much. And the sheep's one of those sheep's got crazy backwards spinning horns and the cat sleeps on them. And again, not a very good zoo. If a cat is one of the animals. Cat and a ram kind of a ram. I don't know what the hell this thing is. It's one of those, you know, big fat Russian beast. Ram sheep. I've never seen it before. But one of the animals at the zoo is a cat. So is it a zoo or is it just the back of a Circle K in Ukraine? But yeah, I don't need that. We in America don't. You know, we've been tossing billions and billions of dollars to the Ukrainian government. They still have cute couple of the year contests. They're not in that much trouble. Some of the billions of dollars.
Freddy
Morale.
Brady
All right, but get there doesn't. Then start spending some of your own money. Get Doge over there and start saying, all right, we gotta. It's just bad PR to have the zoo still churning cash while we're asking for billions from everybody else in the world to make sure that we're still a country. I'm not saying like if New York is under attack, they'd close the wildlife zoo. But if Tucson was, I'm guessing we'd probably be all boarded up and ready to go. Right? Especially if Tucson was losing. And Ukraine, that corner, Ukraine, Russia is breaking through. They've done a nice job, but they're not doing, you know, they're not holding them off.
Freddy
Pretty much be on lockdown. Tucson.
Brady
Yeah. We'd be sitting there. At least Chandler would shut down all animal cutesy couples contests.
Freddy
There'd be a lot of petting zoos closed down.
Brady
Right. You're not doing a lot of kids parties where it's like, hey, could you bring the goat and the sheep over for the weekend? No. Due to the impending attack from the Russians, we're going to have to suspend all of the goat visits, you jackass.
Freddy
It's 50 miles from the front lines. Bring the bounce houses over.
Derek Zellner
Hey, I can't bring the beer burrow to my party this weekend.
Brady
What kind of Ukrainian are you? Like, if you're a man, your country's about to go away. I think I gotta get to the zoo. Gotta vote on that cute couple thing. And then I'll get over there and I'll start helping the boys fight. We got dudes who left the United States to go over and help you Ukrainians fight. One of them goes and calls ktar every once in a while. He had the calling to go. He's wanted to kill Russians his whole life. Evidently was raised that way. Got the chance to go to Ukraine, start popping off some rounds. He ran over there. You got dudes running, scooping zoo poop. I don't know what you're supposed to do with them. I think you just let them go. You got to wonder what happens to zoos in cities that get bombed Like a phoenix was under attack.
Freddy
Oh, it's. I mean, there's some animals you definitely don't want getting out.
Brady
But they're going, right? Nobody's monitoring the zoo?
Freddy
Well, if it's bombed and yeah, you can't repair.
Brady
Well, I mean, if Phoenix was under hippo, right? I mean, it would be weird for a little bit, but it's not business as usual where they're going. You know what we need to do a little. We need some people to get in here. The pr. I mean, we're really seeing our numbers decline since the Russians attacked. Maybe if we did a cute couples contest.
Derek Zellner
They got the bobs at the zoo too.
Freddy
Yeah.
Brady
Oh, maybe. Oh, there it is. Now we know where radio executives go when they finally worn out their welcome here. They run zoos in war torn countries, and they do a terrible job there, too. Well, Larry, let me ask you this. What do you think it'll take to get people to start coming back to the zoo if the Russians stop bombing our city? Besides the obvious, Larry, I mean, that's not very creative. I don't know. Maybe free hazmat suits for the kids or. That's not bad. Larry came up with a great idea for the Phoenix market. Free hazmat suits for the kids at the zoo so they can pop in. That's nice. We're gonna run that in Cincinnati and St. Louis. We'll see if that program works. How do we get people to t the app more for the zoo? Maybe if we didn't have to rely so much on Starlink mobile antennas for Internet. Because of the Russians and the bombing. Sure. Besides that, though, Larry, what about giving bombs away? Hey, is that. Check with Legal. Can we give away munitions? Check with Legal. We need a sponsor. Can learner in Roe buy those sponsors? Because we're not gonna spend a penny on that. Call the learner in the row and see if they'll give us. We'll call. It's a charity. See if we can get some cash out of them.
Freddy
A weekend on a battleship?
Brady
We don't have any. They've all been blown up. Well, that's just lazy, Larry. How come you didn't tell me that before? Shouldn't we be building a battleship? I guess somebody's not doing their job. You're right. It's the Bob's War. Bob's War Bobs. That would make man, you don't want the war Bobs. Oh, that's a great point, Brett. I think maybe you're right. Some radio executives are running this war. At least running that zoo in Ukraine. And they're blind to everything that's going on. Notice in 2021, we had a lot more people visiting the zoo. You think it's the program director? No, I think it's the horrors of war, sir. Well, Larry, that's just our reality. Doesn't mean people still don't want to visit the cat and sheep. Sir, our zoo has a cat. That should tell you everything you need to know about how crappy our zoo is. People love cats. A lot of people lost their cats in the battles. They want to see a cat.
Freddy
Can't we get one of the DJs to wear a sheep suit?
Brady
Why wouldn't we do such? Is Brady sheep sized? Can't Brady walk around with his fleece out? Kids would love that. You can't use Brady anymore, unfortunately. He'd just blow up the morning you. Holmberg's morning sickness. Hear the words you say sometimes? I mean, who talks like that? 98 kill you. P. D. Holmberg's morning sickness. See, Larry, it's my job to find your creativity and tell you when it's bad. Stomp on your ideas with the wettest blanket ever.
Derek Zellner
You're welcome.
Brady
Then tell you you're not playing enough Taylor Swift. Yeah, Brett's right. It's the radio executives that have ruined it. Everything they touch turns to poo. That's why they don't touch us. Leave them alone. It's a good point. Another thing, man. This one out there. Not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie to you. You dizzy? I almost went straight down. I had to fight that one. We'll see. We'll See how this goes? It's getting strange. Eyes aren't working. And then the other thing that I looked at, my friend Winston sent me yesterday. Women's sports always tries to be too much like men's sports, I always think. And now they're really pushing it. As a TCU women's basketball star named Sedona Prince is now facing multiple abuse, sexual assault allegations, and I don't even know how that happens.
Derek Zellner
Sounds like a stripper name almost.
Brady
So she's gone full Deshaun Watson right away. She's the center of a women's college basketball team at tcu. Texas Christian, by the way, for those of you scoring at home, social media star as well, she's been subject of several abuse allegations on the deal. Now, I don't know what that means for a woman to sexually abuse. Like that's an effort. An alleged altercation with a former girlfriend happened last month. She kind of forced herself on her and grabbed it. Then she said that she got a black eye, which isn't sexual abuse so much as it is just abuse. Right.
Derek Zellner
You said an eye, right?
Brady
Yes. Okay, the black eye.
Derek Zellner
Okay.
Brady
Just making sure the Sean wasn't there. There was no forcing of a black guy on her. Attorney said that she denies all the allegations against her. Never abused anyone in her life, mentally, emotionally, or physically. But they're decided to use Sedona as a launch point for. That's what she's saying. They're trying to use me as a launch point for their careers. I never heard of this before. I know. Oh, no. I think she could take it. Brady just showed me a picture of her. She's. God damn, she's got a big head.
Derek Zellner
Drago.
Brady
I think if you have sex with her, it is sexual abuse. I think you've been abused.
Freddy
She's a transfer, too.
Brady
But they didn't say what it is. And I don't know what sexual abuse is. I mean, maybe she's using toys.
Freddy
There's a picture of it right there in action.
Brady
Is that her? Yeah, she's seven feet tall. Is that a normal sized lady next to her? Jesus Christmas. So it's her penis that's doing all the damage. That's what. Okay, now I understand. Okay, well, now it makes sense. Okay, well, there it is. Yeah, she's doing that, but yeah, evidently she's one one incident when sexual misconduct lawsuit was dismissed months after it was filed. Another woman said that she was abusive on a trip to Mexico and detailed in videos, text messages and stuff that said that she was getting her she's 17.69 rebounds a game. Three and a half blocks for the. The horned frogs at TCU. She can palm the basketball as well. But, you know, they've been asking for this. This is part of Title nine. We want to be just like the guys. And now they're doing it. So you know what? In a way, this is progress outside of the paternity. And I wish that weren't true, but it is. That the Mercury suffered that one year when one of their players got pregnant. And then Brittney Griner was evidently mad because she was concerned that it wasn't hers and she wasn't the pregnant one. And then there was domestic violence over there, and they lived. And then we found out that Brittney Griner and another WNBA girl and both of their salaries lived in Buckeye, tried to pretend to be professional athletes. They got a pat over in Buckeye, and then she started to chase her girlfriend Glory all over the neighborhood because she was pregnant. There was a paternity test to find out whose it was. And Brittany waited it out, like Steve Nash. And we were all kind of like, wait a second. What's going on here? You know it's not yours, right? We have to wait for the test, Brittany. Do we? We're positive. It's. We. We may not know whose it is, but we can delete you from the testing. Yes. Gotta wait for them to have to go back. Okay, you're not helping your case here.
Freddy
There was the argument over the donor. Like one of them wanted this one and. Yeah, Wanted. I think.
Brady
And one wanted. And then. But then there was rumor that it was done the old fashioned way. Oh, it was a great story.
Freddy
Yeah.
Brady
It's to this day the WNBA's only paternity problem. You just by adding the W to NBA, you thought you'd be out of that, you know, neck of the woods. You never had a paternity test stuff. You don't have to worry about that. Within the first couple years, they had a who's the Daddy? Episode in the wnba. I mean, come on. You think I'm making it up? Google it. It's retirement. All right, Britney, you know, you're not the father. Gotta rip open that paper. Find out for sure. Maury, I don't. Do we. That's a WNBA paternity problem. I just don't see it happening that way. But there it was. And now you got a sexual assault issue in college. So this is if they want to be more like the men's league. Incredibly progressive thinking. Ladies Sexually assaulting other players. Now, they haven't mentioned it yet, former girlfriends and stuff. So maybe she's just into rough sex. Maybe this is a Trevor Bauer situation that, you know. The text got a little out of hand, made one of the people nervous. She comes out with a black eye, but she was into it, as it turns out, Trevor Bauer, drug through the mud, lost two years of money, two years of his career. Turns out he didn't do a single thing wrong. Right back to that other Trevor Ariza, the guy who's punting now for the Chiefs. That was the Buffalo Bills punter that. That lady said he got too rough with her and he had sex with her. And then she claimed he was raping her all over the place. Lost his job, lost everything. Turned out, not really. He fought it the whole way. So welcome to the world of men's sports, ladies. You've learned a lot. And again, I don't like her game. But Brittany was a trailblazer. She just jumped all the other stuff. First, I think you needed sexual assault, a couple of massage therapists that didn't like where the hands went. And then you jump into paternity test. The paternity test that Brittany hit us with was the first thing. Didn't even have anybody beating up each other's girlfriends. They didn't have cat fights. They jumped right into who's the father. I'm impressed.
Freddy
Well, we never heard.
Brady
What do you mean? Well, that's what I'm saying. But you gotta hear about it for it to be more like the NBA. The game you've had, the drug catch. Brittany's been the one who's gotten all of it.
Freddy
Expand the globe.
Brady
She's done it all. She's done everything an NBA player's done on drug addiction. Gotten arrested. She took it to another level, got arrested in another country. She became a political thing.
Derek Zellner
The og.
Brady
I mean, you can sit and say, ron, our test, world be free. You know, that whole deal. Or not, World be free, whatever he calls himself. Meta peace. You thought he was controversial, that Dennis Rodman took it to another level by going over to Korea. Brittany was first. Britney was getting it done. So congratulations to the TCU horn frog. What I think is the first sexual, multiple sexual assault case we've ever seen in women's sports. That's going the way of the player first. I'm impressed.
Freddy
It's about time.
Brady
It is about time. Title 9's been around for 50. Didn't we just celebrate 50 years screaming about wanting to be more like the men Wanting what all the men get. Well, here you go. Allegations. You got it. Sedona Prince. I mean, if I had a son, I might name it Sedona Prince. That's a pretty tough name.
Freddy
Yeah, she didn't like what was happening in Oregon, so she transferred to tcu.
Brady
Well, maybe she was running from something.
Freddy
Yeah, that's what I.
Brady
To go play in front of those gargantuan crowds at Texas Christian University while she's just hand slapping puss like mad in the locker room.
Freddy
Can't trust that girls are nothing like the organ the duck women.
Brady
See, I always struggled with the WNBA because. And this isn't true in the men's league, but there isn't a lot of homosexual men playing pro sports. There are some. And it caused a problem when we knew openly a couple of them were out and some of the guys were like, I don't know if I want him in the locker room. And I mean a little phobic. The women's game, guessing it's majority. Not only is it a co worker, it's a dating pool. And you get to hang out naked in the locker room all the time. And you know, you're close, you're on the road a lot. I assume it's a breeding ground for some tension release. Like, I mean, if we were all gay, I'm sure by now Brady and I probably jerked each other off the very least, right?
Freddy
Been a lot of that.
Brady
There probably been a lot of that. If we were homosexuals, spent this much time together, eventually. Horn tugging eventually the kettle's gonna whistle and we're gonna feel that heat. We're gonna have to let some pressure off. That's why they always say when a man and a woman do a radio show together, it's inevitable that if eventually they're gonna start touching, they're gonna have a. They're gonna have a thing. Homeworks. Morning sickness. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that? 98 KUPD. Holmberg's Morning Sickness. They told me that when I worked with Stephanie Duran way back in the day. Well, it didn't. We only worked together for a year. But all of them, no horn tugging. None. I was warned by two consultants. You guys have good chemistry. It's fun. Let me tell you this right now. When you've got good chemistry and you're having this kind of fun, I'll warn you right now, do not each other. It happens too often. Like what? Don't worry about it. Trust me. You'll get drunk, you'll Start touching, you'll laugh. One of you might be going through something. It happens way too often.
Freddy
Be careful, Shark.
Brady
Their sexual tension. Oh, Ladonna's gonna have at. You know, Hervey, Sharp, I had a rough night last night, and I sure could let somebody loose on this honey hole, that's for sure. Why don't you stand there in that white uniform, Sharp, and extend me a little sexual courtesy? Ladonna, I'm married. We're both married to our jobs. Now get on your knees and do what's right. I got a lot of tension, and I can't deliver news like this. Somebody needs to release a valve.
Freddy
Are we clear?
Brady
Are we clear? Sure. Ladonna, I don't. Are we clear? Crystal. Now I'm gonna drop my pants, and it's gonna smell like power in here. For a second, you're gonna get dizzy like Holmberg's been all morning. Then you're gonna get down on your knees and do what's right. Pray at the altar of ladonna.
Freddy
Did you order the Code Red?
Brady
Well, it is code red. Every 28 days, you're gonna earn something called your Ladonna wings. But the consultant said we should never breach. You know what? That consultant, too. Get him in here. I didn't move all the way from San Diego to hang out with a bunch of limp dick Tang bangers. Now bend me over and be a man. We got news to deliver. Roller, do the traffic. This shouldn't take long. It's inevitable. It's inevitable that Sharp and Ladonna get it on. Inevitable. Jim's gonna have an apple in his mouth and his hands tied behind his back. They gave Sharp, but what for this morning? Now, let's check the weather. It's humid in here. What's it like outside?
Freddy
For years, KZ was. Where's Beth and Friends with Benefits?
Brady
Yeah, yeah. Beth and Friends with Benefits would have been a better show, but again, you don't want to be on the receiving end of best friends, boomstick. But the girls basketball, they date. You don't have that problem with the Suns if you. And it's, like, wide open, like if Kevin Durant and Devin Booker were dating.
Freddy
About the coach.
Brady
They date the coach.
Freddy
One of the players.
Brady
I've never heard of that.
Freddy
That happened. I thought that happened in the wnba.
Brady
I don't. I don't know about that. I just know that I know the players date, and if I'm a general manager, I don't need that. I'm trading one of them if they start falling in Love with each other. I got to get rid of one of them that's going to cause trouble. You know, bring their home problems into the office. Can't have that. Can't be done. We knew married morning show couples that started having sex with other people on their show because they're together too much. They'd bring their married people problems to the work, and then one of them would confide in a producer or something. The producer would be like, you don't need this, because he's mad at the other person too. Next thing you know, they're naked and rolling around. Then you gotta come home and find out you lost not only your wife, your job, your whole show disappears. It would be rough. So I don't know what sexual assault boundaries there are in the wnba. I know you're not. I know the. I know what sexual assault is, but I don't know. If you're dating and stuff, it's like. And it gets a little rough. Is that sexual assault, or is it just a bad relationship with a co worker?
Freddy
Our buddy Bryce brings up the point that the. The transfer from Oregon to TCU is a much better upgrade in women. TCU women are beautiful.
Brady
Oh, that's right. My friend's son went to tcu and, yeah, he. He. He said it was. Yeah. Even my. His dad would tell me, it's like that school is just. It's ridiculous that you walk around there and you say, I gotta go. It's like a strip club that's about to break out. It's just stacked top to bottom. It's fine. It was what ASU used to be before they became some sort of weird business college. And now it's just Indians and Asians all over the place that don't want to take their clothes off instead of rich white girls that aren't very smart. I like the issue when it was kind of dumb and white. Now it's smart and foreign and like, ah, you guys are still pretty, but you're not interested. And Dream palace had a line out the door. And it wasn't for guys trying to get in. It was for people trying to get jobs there. ASU was a dumb white girl party school. Like, we should do better in math. And the next thing you know, people started going there for school, and smart people started to show up with, like, boundaries and morals. Terrible. Whatever happened to that school is terrible.
Derek Zellner
What the hell is going on?
Brady
The hell is this country coming to? But, you know, if you want to be taken seriously as a school, I guess you do it that way, if you want to be the number one party school in Playboy for 15 years running, the old ASU is better. A lot better.
Freddy
At one point, they're like, all right, we've done this.
Brady
Yeah, I guess. But for every four years, at least it. Why stop? Why stop? Just. It was churning out. Yeah, it was sort of like Ohio State's football program. Jesus. They keep recruiting their number one party school every year. Anyway, I just think if your players are allowed to date, you're asking for this. So in a way, kudos to the WNBA for not having this problem all the time. Because you think about it, in all other sports, you're not. You're not really burdened with the issue of attraction between players actually manifesting into relationships. Wnba, girl sports, they've got that. These girls start bumping donuts on the road, and then they get in fights. Now there's jealousy and anger, and I don't know how it works, but the TCU girl made it right. She did the desean Watson. And maybe there's something about being in Texas because that's where Larry Nassar was. He was at Michigan State, but a lot of his stuff was down there in that. That Texas gymnast thing. And then, you know, desean was in Houston, a lot of that stuff. Who's the most recent one that just got busted at the massage parlor?
Derek Zellner
The kicker from the ring.
Brady
Oh, that's right. It was a Justin Tuggar.
Freddy
Kind of went quiet.
Brady
Well, that's a kicker.
Derek Zellner
Someone just emailed in to you.
Brady
Uh. Oh, read it. Let's take. Pretty sure they just. I. Pretty sure I just heard on the radio Ladonna Harvey called Jim Sharp a lip limp dick wang banger. Interesting. That was my son's nickname in high school. Signed Dan Holmberg. Well, now, hold on. He's not wrong. It's not fair, but he's not wrong. Anyway, it's been a lovely Valentine's start with sexual assault stuff.
Freddy
Beyond Love is in the air.
Brady
Love is in the air. I'm just upset about Bianca and Kanye. And again, thanks to the EMTs of Phoenix for caring so much to just jet right over here, make sure I'm all right, you greedy sons of bitches. Maybe Luigi was right. Nobody really cares about my health. For real. I have to pay you first. Bert, what do you got on the big board of musical treats?
Derek Zellner
All right, wake up song time, of course, brought to you by Action Ride Shop. And as you guys seen, snow hitting up north. So now's the time to head over to the Gilbert and Southern Store of Action Ride Shop. Josh and the boys are going to take care of you up there. And don't forget grand opening of store number two. But this one's only dedicated to bikes. All the bike stuff is over there on Power and McDowell. But if you want all you snowboarders and skiers, head on over to Gilbert and Southern today. Josh take care of you. Actionrideshop.com on the list.
Brady
If you use the phrase limit. Limp dick wang banger. 10 off.
Derek Zellner
Nice.
Brady
You gotta. Yeah, you gotta ask for Josh. I'm here for the Big Red. The Big Red Limp dick wing banger. And then Josh will go. That's me. On the list.
Derek Zellner
We got some Valentine's Day ones. I used to love her cat scratch fever. What else was on there? Show me your fish. Well, that was actually to check your. To check your mentality.
Brady
I don't think I could get hit in the head.
Derek Zellner
3:11. Beautiful disaster. Just to make sure you're okay. Manson rock is dead. And then of course, for you, there's a bunch of them. Mama said knock you out. Close my eyes forever. Double vision from Foreigner.
Brady
Got a whole bunch of that.
Derek Zellner
Diary of a Madman Tools Vicarious and Quiet Riot bang. Your head seemed to be the most appropriate one for you this morning.
Brady
Let's do that. All right. Okay. In the morning. And don't do that. If you hit your head. And I think I hit it twice. I. I think when Bus hit me in the head the first time, it.
Freddy
Could have been more than that.
Brady
I think I hit my head on the way down not knowing it on the kitchen island because the back of my head is a huge lump on it. But it's not, like, sore or anything. It's just a big bump.
Freddy
God, I wish there was a blank camera.
Brady
Me too. God, that would be. It would have been so funny because I do know I stood there kind of dizzy for like a few seconds and I didn't say anything. And then I don't remember anything. And when I woke up, I was laying the other direction. So I went. I evidently took a couple of steps or fell back, bounced off the island and then who knows?
Freddy
And the rest of the dogs didn't make a run at Cookie Window. Like there wasn't like the.
Brady
They'd already gotten their cookie.
Freddy
Yeah, they already gotten them.
Brady
Yeah. Bus was the last one. He played tree ball for a second and then came shooting towards Cookie Window last. Knowing I've got a few seconds while he feeds the other dog's cookie. Yeah, yeah. It was one of those. He Just hit his tree balls, like, best day ever. Ran in there's Daddy knocks me cold. I don't know that he got a cookie.
Freddy
What happened?
Brady
I don't remember. I don't know if I gave. I don't. I know I didn't give Bus a cookie because I was giving Jack his cookie when he Skull thugged me. Never get hit in the head with a 20 mile an hour bulldog. Skull.
Derek Zellner
You're like glass Joe. Mike Tyson's punch out, huh? It was just one punch.
Brady
I got dropped. Well, you don't see it coming. It was a sucker punch from a bulldog.
Freddy
He's got heavy hands.
Brady
That is the stuff he can tolerate. Nothing hurts him. He rams into walls and looks at you like, I'm a bulldog. It's in the name, like, all right, give your horn a tog, dad. It's no big deal. I get hit in the head all the time. Nothing ever happens to me. Tree ball. Gonna go play tree ball for a little while. Then he goes and tugs on a tree and then comes back and smashes me out. So, yeah, I think when I went down, I may have hit my head a second time. But looking on the Internet and stuff, all it says is it can take a couple days for you to really start feeling it. It. That's what I read. Like, midnight last night when I kind of had another fog that was hitting me, like, don't drink. It said don't drink. I haven't done that. I hadn't taken any aspirin or anything, just in case I don't know what I'm doing. We'll find out. I may be leaving early, though, but I think this is an appropriate wake up. I got most of my stuff together. It's the trails, the dizziness, the occasional blackouts that's got me a touch concerned.
Derek Zellner
Yeah, I would say.
Brady
Otherwise, I feel great. I'll drive for Uber later tonight and see how it goes on Valentine's Day. Let's start doing that. All the coughs. It's really getting to me. You know what? I don't want to take you or your bags to the airport. It's mental health. It's 98 KUPD. It's my theme song. It's out of control now. 98 KUPD.
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode Date: February 14, 2025
Host/Author: 98KUPD | Hubbard Radio
Episode Title: Dobson High Football Coach Arrested On Campus By Surprise PD - Russia Trying TO Bomb Chernobyl And We Found Out Ukraine Zoo Is Still Open - TCU Women's BBall Player Facing Charges Of Sexual Assault
Release Date: February 14, 2025
The episode kicks off with a heated discussion surrounding the unexpected arrest of Dobson High School's football coach by the Surprise Police Department. Hosts Brady Bogen, Derek Zellner, and Freddy engage in a spirited debate, highlighting the shock and confusion surrounding the incident.
Brady Bogen humorously mocks the situation, stating, “Heals arrested on campus Thursday by surprise police… He fixes credit in high school. That's not good” [02:03].
Derek Zellner interjects with skepticism: “Not DJ” [02:17], clarifying details about the coach’s previous commendable record.
The conversation spirals into playful insults, with Brady declaring, “Suck you, Brady. Suck off. Suck you and your sucking family” [03:00], illustrating the hosts' camaraderie and banter.
Brady continues to lampoon the coaching staff, proclaiming, “DZ did all the blocking, snapping, throwing… But they were just too selfish” [05:20], emphasizing his disbelief and amusement over the coach's sudden downfall.
The segment underscores the hosts' ability to blend serious news with humor, keeping listeners entertained while discussing local controversies.
Transitioning to international affairs, the hosts delve into Russia's alleged attempt to bomb Chernobyl, a move that could have catastrophic environmental consequences.
Brady outlines the scenario: “They tried to throw a bomb at it, which would just be catastrophic if it went off” [12:25], expressing genuine concern over the potential fallout.
The discussion touches on the significance of Chernobyl's containment efforts, with Brady explaining the protective measures in place: “They put this stuff over it to kind of protect the fact that there's nothing they can do with all this potential nuclear crap” [12:55].
Derek Zellner adds context, questioning the motives behind such an act: “Russia tried to bomb their own country, so” [13:11].
The conversation highlights the gravity of geopolitical tensions and the precarious state of nuclear safety in conflict zones.
Shifting focus, the hosts explore the resilience of Ukrainian zoos amidst ongoing warfare, contrasting it with the dire situation at Chernobyl.
Brady brings levity to the topic by sharing the story of a cat and a sheep becoming best friends at a Ukrainian zoo: “A sheep and a cat are best friends” [13:33].
The hosts discuss the symbolic nature of such stories, debating whether it’s appropriate to highlight them during wartime: “We're doing cutesy stories at the Ukrainian zoo. That's not where we should be focused” [14:20].
Freddy muses on wartime priorities, referencing historical events: “Back then during World War II, when France was in… if there were zoos in the other towns” [15:22].
Brady questions the practicality of maintaining zoos in conflict zones, proposing hypothetical scenarios: “If Phoenix was under attack… would we still be going to the zoo?” [18:29].
The segment juxtaposes the resilience of animal care with the harsh realities of war, prompting listeners to reflect on human priorities in times of crisis.
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to discussing the controversial allegations against Sedona Prince, a star player for TCU's women's basketball team.
Brady introduces the topic with a critical tone: “Sedona Prince is now facing multiple abuse, sexual assault allegations” [24:34], setting the stage for a deep dive into the issue.
The hosts dissect the nature of the allegations, debating their validity and implications: “She denies all the allegations against her… But they're decided to use Sedona as a launch point for their careers” [25:20].
Derek Zellner offers a glimpse into broader implications within women's sports: “Ladies Sexually assaulting other players. Now, they haven't mentioned it yet, former girlfriends and stuff” [31:31].
Brady humorously references media figures while discussing the sensitivity of the topic: “That's a WNBA paternity problem. You just by adding the W to NBA, you thought you'd be out of that” [30:37].
The discussion underscores the complexities of addressing sexual misconduct in sports, blending serious concerns with the hosts' characteristic humor.
Throughout the episode, the hosts intersperse their main topics with personal anecdotes and light-hearted banter, maintaining an engaging and relatable atmosphere.
Brady shares a personal mishap involving a head injury, intertwining it with humorous reflections: “I hit my head on the kitchen island… I'm a bulldog. It's in the name” [43:40].
The camaraderie between the hosts is evident as they joke about each other's experiences and preferences, enhancing the show's dynamic: “You're in the presence of greatness” [03:02].
A playful exchange about potential relationships within the workplace adds a layer of humor: “I have to fight that one… Somebody needs to release a valve” [35:04].
These moments of levity provide balance to the more serious discussions, offering listeners a comprehensive and entertaining experience.
As the episode winds down, the hosts reflect on the day's topics, reiterating key points with their signature humor and enthusiasm.
Brady concludes with a mix of sarcasm and concern: “Debating if Russia will bomb Chernobyl while Ukraine keeps its zoo open… it’s been a lovely Valentine's start with sexual assault stuff” [41:10].
The hosts wrap up by addressing their listeners directly, infusing the final moments with their unique blend of humor and sincerity: “Holmberg's morning sickness. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?” [35:30].
The conclusion ties together the episode's various threads, leaving listeners both informed and entertained.
Brady Bogen: “Revel Hollingsworth, one of our favorite named listeners emailed in…” [01:38]
Derek Zellner: “Oh, don't.” [01:55]
Brady Bogen: “Everybody's getting arrested for indecent exposure. Only one that wouldn't is DZ, because that is called decent exposure” [03:02]
Brady Bogen: “Congrats tz. Red.” [06:59]
Brady Bogen: “Holmberg's morning sickness. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?” [35:30]
These quotes exemplify the show's humorous and irreverent style, capturing the essence of the hosts' interactions and perspectives.
Conclusion
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona adeptly blends local news, international affairs, and personal anecdotes with the hosts' trademark humor and banter. From the arrest of a high school football coach to geopolitical tensions involving Chernobyl and the resilience of Ukrainian zoos, the episode offers a diverse range of topics. Additionally, the serious discussion on sexual assault allegations within women's basketball provides depth and engages listeners in important conversations. All the while, the hosts maintain an entertaining and relatable atmosphere, making the show both informative and enjoyable for a broad audience.