02-17-25 - BR - MON - Fun Facts On Sacto Mountains And US Mail - Poll Asks Would You Drive On A Bridge To Europe - Huge Counterfeit Stamp Bust - Brazil Experiencing Ozempic Thefts - 2nd Grader Has Gun Go Off At School

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode Release Date: February 17, 2025

Hosts:

• John Holmberg (Main Host)
• Brady Bogen
• Bret Vesely (Attributed as "C")
• Dick Toledo (Attributed as "D")
• E (Co-host)

---

1. Introduction to President's Day News

At [01:33], Brady kicks off the segment with President's Day news, blending celebrations with intriguing fun facts.

Brady:
"Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello world. Happy President's Day. And also Random Acts of Kindness Day."

2. Fun Facts: Sutter Buttes and US Postal Service

Brady shares fascinating information about the world's smallest mountain range and unique postal service practices.

• Sutter Buttes:

  • Described as "a circular area of volcanic remnants about 10 miles across," formed [02:02] approximately 1.6 million years ago.

  Brady:
  "The world's smallest mountain range is just outside of Sacramento, California. It's called the Sutter Buttes... It was formed 1.6 million years ago."

• US Postal Service Quirks:

  • Discussed at [02:15], highlighting unconventional items that can be mailed without a box, such as coconuts, potatoes, and pillows.

  Brady:
  "You can send a coconut, a potato, a sombrero, a brick, an inflated beach ball, a Frisbee, and a pillow through the US Postal Service without a box."

3. Poll: Driving a Bridge to Europe

A poll was conducted to gauge public interest in driving across a hypothetical bridge from the USA to Europe.

• Results:

  • 35% Yes
  • 19% Maybe
  • 18% No
  • 28% Hell no, it'd be a 3100-mile trek

• Discussion Points:

  • The closest point proposed is from Maine to Portugal, a distance necessitating 36 hours of driving at maximum highway speeds.

  Brady:
  "A new poll asked people, if it were possible, would you drive across a massive bridge from USA to Europe... it would take you 36 hours to complete."

Bret ("C") expressed skepticism about the feasibility during adverse weather conditions, citing concerns like Nor'easters.

4. Counterfeit Stamp Bust in Chicago

Brady reports on a significant crackdown by U.S. Customs and Border Protection on counterfeit Forever stamps.

• Details:

  • 161,000 fake stamps intercepted, largely originating from China.
  • Genuine value of the seized stamps estimated at $118,000.

  Brady:
  "The U.S. customs and Border protection agencies made a big bust in Chicago. They caught boxes of counterfeit US stamps. The Forever stamps. 161,000 fake stamps."

Bret ("C") humorously remarked on the credibility of the operation, highlighting the extensive investigation involved.

5. Ozempic Thefts in Brazil

A surge in thefts related to the diabetes drug Ozempic is affecting Brazil.

• Impact:

  • Criminals are targeting bodegas and pharmacies, demanding cash and stealing Ozempic in high demand.

  Brady:
  "There's a big crime spree going on in Brazil right now. Not only they're knocking off bodegas pharmacies... They want the gold Ozempic."

Discussion:
The hosts delved into the side effects and societal implications of Ozempic usage, with Bret ("C") humorously critiquing its effects on personal relationships.

6. Gun Discharge Incident at School

A concerning incident involving a gun discharge occurred at Huntsville Elementary School in Alabama.

• Incident Overview:

  • A 23-year-old student accidentally discharged a firearm from his backpack, hitting another classmate.
  • The bullet was fortunately stopped by a laptop.

  Brady:
  "An Alabama second grader at Huntsville Elementary School had a gun discharge in his backpack... the firearm discharged while inside the pack backpack."

Bret ("C") questioned how the handgun entered the student's backpack, emphasizing the severity of school safety.

7. Viewer-Submitted Videos and Discussions

The hosts reviewed various viewer-submitted videos, ranging from humorous motorcycle mishaps to concerning incidents involving animals at zoos.

• Motorcycle Ride Video:
  Showcased a couple on a motorcycle with questionable safety measures, prompting light-hearted criticism.

  Bret ("C"):
  "He's wearing the helmet. That can't be the approved outfit for riding a bike, though."

• Zoo Animal Behavior Video:
  Featured a monkey exhibiting unusual behavior by eating its feces, leading to discussions on animal training and natural behaviors.

  Bret ("C"):
  "That's like those two Guinness twins, only with one bike."

8. Amputee Sexualization Discussion

A controversial segment where the hosts discussed the sexualization of amputees, sparked by a historical reference to amputee-themed pornography from the 1970s.

• Key Points:

  • Debate over the appropriateness and ethics of sexualizing physical disabilities.
  • Hosts shared personal opinions, with some expressing discomfort and criticizing the normalization of such content.

  Bret ("C"):
  "The last thing you want your marriage to be is soft and dry or your relationship. But you ozem pigged up because you plopped on a bunch of weight."

Note: This segment touched on sensitive topics and may be considered inappropriate by some listeners.

9. Closing Remarks and Additional News

John Holmberg wrapped up the episode by mentioning additional news items, including Chester Bennington's son's gender revelation and humorous musings on celebrity relationships.

John Holmberg:
"Linkin park in the news this week, too is Chester Bennington's son has come out as transgender."

---

Conclusion: This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness navigated through a diverse range of topics, from light-hearted fun facts and public polls to serious discussions on crime and sensitive social issues. The hosts engaged in lively banter, providing listeners with both information and entertainment.

---

For more episodes, tune in to 98 KUPD (97.9 FM, the 98KUPD app, or www.98kupd.com) weekdays from 5:30 AM to 10:00 AM.

Transcript

[Dick Toledo]

It's Dick Toledo and new customers right now on FanDuel. Get $150 in bonus bets when your first $5 wager wins. Just visit FanDuel.com KUPD to grab $150 in college hoops bonus bets with a winning $5 bet and prepare for March on FanDuel America's 1 Sportsbook 21 plus in President Arizona first online real money wager only $5 first deposit required. Bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets which expire seven days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See [e-mail] gambling problem. Call 1-800-next- step or text NEXT STEP to you. Thought that was funny?

[Brady]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you?

[C]

This is an actual quote from that neo Nazi pedophile group that was known as cvlt, which is pronounced cult. They describe themselves as an online group that espoused neo Nazism, nihilism and pedophilia as its core principles.

[D]

Well, you know, it sounds kind of.

[C]

I mean they're. They're well organized, I guess. But that's what the Nazis were the second you read that. Isn't everybody under arrest? Like don't you just find all the IP addresses attached and arrest them all? Even if it's Pete Townsend or the who is on there. You just throw them in jail and ask them questions. Crazy. Anyway, it's time now, 8:02 for Brady to give you all the President's Day news. He knows we call this the Brady Report. Brady Report.

[Brady]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello world.

[C]

Hi.

[Brady]

Happy President's Day. And also Random Acts of Kindness Day. Okay, a couple of basis fun facts. The world's smallest mountain range is just outside of Sacramento, California. It's called the Sutter Buttes. It's a circular area of volcanic remnants which is about 10 miles across. It was formed a long time ago.

[C]

Sure. Thanks, buddy.

[Brady]

1.6 million years ago.

[E]

In the 40s. Before it was just flat then that.

[Brady]

You can send a coconut, a potato, a sombrero, a brick, an inflated beach ball and a Frisbee and a pillow through the US Postal Service without a box. You just have to make sure it got enough postage on it and the address label. Just slap it on that coconut and send it.

[E]

That mountain range was a while ago for those who weren't sure.

[Brady]

I mean, a long time ago.

[C]

Breaking news. A mountain range came out of nowhere near Sacramento just the other day.

[E]

I figured that out a long time ago.

[Dick Toledo]

Nope, not working with ladonna.

[C]

Last Tuesday.

[Brady]

The Dallas Cowboys were the first NFL team to make nachos popular at their stadium, thanks to Howard Cosell. Had him at Monday night football game in 1978. Loved him. And that got the NFL on board.

[C]

And started serving nachos at stadiums because Howard said, hey, you should try this.

[Brady]

These are amazing.

[C]

Thanks, Brady. Cheese and chips. What are you all right? Don't do that.

[Brady]

A new poll asked people.

[C]

It was Brady Cosell. It wasn't even like an attempt at a voice.

[D]

Lil Howard.

[C]

It was. Yeah, now we got that.

[E]

These are amazing. From this reporter's ears to your mouth.

[Brady]

A new poll asked people, if it were possible, would you drive across a massive bridge from USA to Europe, assuming the proper facilities were along the way, like rest stops and gas stations. 35% of the people said yes, 19% said maybe, 18% no, and 28% said, hell no, it'd be a 3100 miles.

[C]

So it's like driving.

[Brady]

The closest point they're saying is Maine to Portugal.

[C]

Oh, they go down and then bounce up a little bit. The tip of Maine to Portugal. Portugal's with a Portuguese, like the island of Madeira, which is part of Portugal, but it's off into the ocean a little bit.

[Brady]

Not sure.

[C]

Well, then you need another bridge. Well, it would have to be a stopping point. It's beautiful, by the way. Look it up online.

[Dick Toledo]

Is that the place you were looking at? The big valley?

[C]

Unreal.

[Brady]

And if they accomplish it, assuming the maximum highway speed of 85 miles per hour, it would take you 36 hours to complete.

[C]

Yeah, it's like driving across the country. I'm in weather would keep me out. Yeah, I'm not. Not getting trapped on that bridge. Something. Some nor'easter comes blowing over and I'd be too nervous. There's no turning around.

[Dick Toledo]

Pull over. Don't turn your hazards on.

[C]

What if there's an accident? I've been on the drive back from show low where the 260. There's a wreck and there's a fatality. It was on New Year's Eve, in fact. Started heading back. There's a fatality. You see the helicopter come dropping down. Then a cops like, we're gonna close the road. You guys got to go back. Had to drive back. There was no in and out. You couldn't. If that bridge, if there's a hold up. Yeah, you're stuck there. You got to turn around and go back to the United States. Or wait. It's. It's. It's like driving a Flagstaff. You can't have any accidents. Nothing worse on a Sunday coming back from Sedona or Flagstaff and there's a wreck, you're there all day. Like two three hour delays just to move the car.

[Brady]

The U.S. customs and Border protection agencies made a big bust in Chicago. They caught boxes of counterfeit US stamps. The Forever stamps. 161,000 fake stamps. God, they're coming from China.

[C]

Chinese fentanyl stamps covered in Covid.

[Brady]

All the parcels were arriving from China and if genuine, the face value would be $118,000.

[C]

Genuine. Brady says the street cred on that. Genuine man.

[D]

No kidding.

[Brady]

There's a big crime spree going on in Brazil right now. Not only they're knocking off bodegas pharmacies. And when they go into the pharmacies, they demand cash. And the big pay, the gold Ozempic. They want to take whatever they have in there because there's such a demand.

[C]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And they're getting big bucks for it.

[C]

Reading about Ozempig this weekend and yes, I call it Ozempig because there's someone here who's using it that I call that. But I was reading about it and it's the irony of Ozempig is yeah, you'll look better, but you can't get hard ons. And ladies dry up like the Sahara.

[Dick Toledo]

I also was reading something about called frozen stomach.

[C]

What's. Oh yeah, I've heard of that too. That screws it up. And that's the down the road stuff.

[Dick Toledo]

That'S not immediate, but the confidence build.

[C]

Like I feel great and I look good, but my dick doesn't work and my lady parts are sandy. It's like. Like you got a beach lady and a soft and dry. It's like everything you want your laundry.

[Dick Toledo]

To be the opposite. AMC Hammer. Soft and wet.

[C]

Soft and wet is different. Soft and dry is like usually there's a snuggle bear attached to that.

[E]

We'll make everything soft and dry.

[C]

The last thing you want your marriage to be is soft and dry or your relationship. But you ozem pigged up because you plopped on a bunch of weight. Not caring about each other for a long time and then. So you gave up you ozempig and then you can't get wood. What's the point of looking good if you can't have, you know, naughty time? Honestly, like if you feel good about yourself and you look good, but it's a specific purpose. Exactly. It's to be more attractive. And that leads to what? Boom.

[Dick Toledo]

Boom.

[C]

Soft and dry is what it leads to. So enjoy that. Ozempic.

[Brady]

An Alabama second grader at Huntsville Elementary School had a gun discharge in his backpack.

[C]

In fairness, he was 23.

[Brady]

It exited out of his backpack into another classmate's backpack. And thank God for the laptop because it stopped the bullet.

[C]

I thought it hit his gun.

[Brady]

Investigators determined that the firearm discharged while inside the pack backpack. But the student says he doesn't know how the handgun got into his backpack. No charges will be filed.

[C]

That's right. They believed him.

[E]

That is mine. I think one of the black kids did it.

[C]

I believe you're probably right. Here in Alabama, that's what we're gonna come from. Wells, would you get a handgun in a white boy's backpack? La David. David, come up here for a second. And here in Alabama we don't take kindly what you've done to little Trevor.

[Brady]

It's 2029 year old Florida man named Michael. Gizmo Gonzalez was at a family dollar a while back and he walked out with $50 worth of cleaning supplies and a box of Goldfish crackers. The manager, a brave 65 year old woman named Diane, she saw him leave without paying and confronting him in the parking lot. There was an argument and Gizmo hit Diane in the face with the box of goldfish causing small cut under her lip. He got away but apparently he left a goldfish at the scene because the cops did a forensic analysis. Lifted some prints out from the box.

[C]

No.

[Brady]

Determined that Gizmo was the robber. Gizmo was already in the system because he had a long rap sheet.

[C]

He's Gizmo, he's in the system. He's got his DNA on file and everything. Gizmo's a problem.

[Brady]

Gizmo Martinez got a mug shot of Gizmo.

[C]

Anybody who wants to be called Gizmo is probably on a lot of FBI lists.

[John Holmberg]

John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[C]

Let's take a look at Gizmo. I is Giz. Wow.

[Brady]

Wasn't what I was picturing right away.

[C]

His neck has a tattoo on it that says sulfur. Sulfur scorpion. I don't know what that is. Maybe you can see it.

[Brady]

Florida. There is. Oh no, that's not.

[C]

By the way, I just got an email that said that that Chinese. No, I thought Gizmo would be. Well, that may be because I grew up in the 80s. So it's everybody named Gizmo was working on a Commodore. So I pictured like some nerdy weird white Dude, I did not picture prison tats all the way up the neck and an afro.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

No, not what I pictured Gizmo to look like.

[Dick Toledo]

Isn't his last name Gonzalez?

[D]

Yeah, that's what I expected.

[C]

Well, I don't. Yeah, but the afro is. That's a Mexican Afro.

[Dick Toledo]

So you're saying he just got wet?

[C]

What?

[Brady]

Soft and wet With Gizmo?

[C]

No, I'm not saying that. That's horrible.

[D]

Don't feed him after midnight either.

[C]

Oh, that Gizmo. I thought he may just got here.

[Brady]

Not get mo.

[C]

That's how you said people get here from where he's from. He just got wet. Christ on a crutch. No, that's not what I'm saying. He's been dry for years. He's probably a citizen. Even. Somebody emailed and said that the stamp story is years old. Unless it's new again. It was on an episode of Contraband. Did it have a date on it?

[Brady]

Check.

[C]

There's a guy said. I just saw a story about this on Contraband. It's a few years ago.

[Brady]

Say, the forever stamps. Aren't those. Have they been around for a while?

[C]

Forever.

[Dick Toledo]

It would seem.

[Brady]

Not true.

[C]

Well, you asked the question. Don't tell me what you know.

[Brady]

No, you need to think about the.

[Dick Toledo]

Structure of your sentence.

[C]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Those forever stamps, how long have they been around?

[C]

What are you Ken Jennings or asking questions to know the answers to.

[Brady]

This? Says released on February 13, 2025.

[C]

But it doesn't say the. Like the date, when they were like. They're just mopping up some details of the story. Or is it the reason he's asking? Is it. Did this happen again?

[Brady]

Must have happened again.

[C]

Chinese. After our stamps on the reg, in fact. Perhaps. Brett. Forever.

[E]

How long those been around?

[C]

Forever. No, get snotty with me.

[D]

Chinese are in on stamps. They. Come on. They're just using those anymore.

[C]

They're just bullying us a little bit. That's. That's just.

[Brady]

They're just trolling, shipping them over here. People use them.

[C]

I don't know who's using that many stamps. I have a feeling that's. I don't want to say it out loud because there's a lot of Post office workers have been pretty quiet for the last few years. But I have a feeling that Doge. Once they get to the usps, look out. Oh, boy. You're going to see some definite cuts there.

[Dick Toledo]

Maybe that's where Elon will draw the line.

[C]

Don't piss off the post office. Like you can piss all these Other government workers off. They've been quiet for a long time. Before school shootings, that was called going postal. They were doing that pretty regularly to a point where we kind of ignored it. Like, that's another post office guy.

[Dick Toledo]

Guys, to go back to your prison tattoo story, you're saying his name Gizmo with a hard G. In Spanish. It's pronounced with a J.

[C]

Or he's mo Yizmo, like yakaranda yizmo.

[Dick Toledo]

It's not a hard J, not a hard J.

[C]

Even the Spanish would be like, stop calling me that, even though it's accurate. Although that's my new nickname for Justin Tuggar. Time to Roll out, Jizmo. Jizmo 3000 is going to try another 50 yarder here for the Ravens.

[Dick Toledo]

John, I've been listening for a while. Is it possible since you guys look so much alike, that your head injury has started to affect Brady? He has a precarious concussion.

[C]

We're those twins from the Time Life books. I hit my head and he gets dumber. How's it possible?

[E]

Yeah, that's what happened to me the other night. John was evidently giving himself a hand job and I finished all over the therapist's bed.

[Brady]

It's John again.

[C]

He did it.

[E]

Honest engine. I didn't do. People still say honest engine?

[C]

I don't think so, Brady.

[Brady]

There's a bunch of bodegas in New York that are dealing with the egg crisis because eggs are so expensive, they're selling now. They call them Lucy's. Basically, you can buy three eggs.

[C]

You can pull them out one at a time.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[C]

Buck and a half each.

[Brady]

299 for three.

[C]

Oh, for three. That's three. That's a buck each.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[C]

Because right now I just saw a dozen eggs online. Were 12:50.

[Dick Toledo]

You see the lines outside the. Like the local chicken farms, like, what's the Hickman's or whatever.

[C]

People can go get them there. Yeah, that Hickman guy was on KTR the day before they asked me to be on there and they started, like rolling off facts that Mr. Hickman said they got some trouble. Man, we're gonna be having some egg problems for a while. 60 million birds died.

[Brady]

Toledo and Brett. There's a Swiss company online that's selling tubes of coffee that you can spread on your morning toast or croissant.

[Dick Toledo]

No, thanks.

[Brady]

It's kind of like a tube of oil paint that's black. It's thick enough that you can.

[Dick Toledo]

You're not selling on fruit.

[Brady]

Put it on banana.

[C]

People will eat that coffee flavored Stuff goes. But that just sounds.

[Brady]

They advertise as a product you can eat or drink because you can mix it in water if you want.

[C]

So it's like Hershey's syrup only coffee.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's 100 fair trade.

[C]

Herb. Herb.

[Brady]

Arabica beans.

[C]

Man, that's lazy. Just squirting your Hershey's coffee juice. Herp.

[Brady]

It's like coffee Nutella.

[C]

No, as a non coffee guy, I just don't get it.

[Brady]

You can get a single tube for 17 bucks. They say that's the equivalent of 20 cups of coffee.

[C]

Oh, you know what's gonna start happening there? People start making those giant milkshakes. Just use the whole tube.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah, you just dab it.

[C]

My mom used to get so mad when I take that Hershey's syrup and half cup that thing. You could see it resting in the bottom of the glass in a pile. Wouldn't even stir in anymore. My chocolate milk was just black. Oh. Makes me want it now.

[Brady]

Got some radio videos. First one's a couple on a motorcycle ride. Doesn't last real long.

[C]

All right.

[Brady]

He goes off roading.

[C]

Oh, we're in, like, a neighborhood. It's like somebody's house. This doesn't look like. Oh, they're on a little baby. Oh, he clotheslined her on a tree branch. Oh, that can't be.

[Brady]

He's wearing the helmet.

[C]

He's got the helmet on. That can't be the approved outfit for riding a bike, though. He's shirtless in a helmet, and she's just huge.

[D]

His cans would have protected him.

[C]

As fat as those two are, I feel sorry for the tree.

[D]

Kidding.

[C]

That's like those two Guinness twins, only with one bike.

[D]

Yeah, his cans would have protected him.

[C]

He's got airbags, milkers on him, doesn't he?

[Brady]

I think it's the same backyard. This is a local dentist.

[C]

Oh, is it a Dremel? Yes. Oh, my God. It's a Dremel on a dude's tooth.

[Brady]

Look at the dust coming out of there.

[C]

What are they fixing?

[Brady]

Just piling it down.

[C]

How sharp is your tooth?

[Brady]

He's got, like, a tusk, and then it sucks. Look at that.

[C]

What? What is the end game there? What was. That's not fixing a cavity. He only had three teeth to begin with.

[Brady]

Two tusks on the bottom.

[C]

Oh, were they just banging into his lip or something? Probably got too out of control. Oh, man. Oh, boy. That was bad. All right. Oh, that hurt.

[Brady]

Another lady on a scooter. I don't know how she's inside.

[C]

Yes, Indoors.

[Brady]

Calling it a day. Gotta back it out.

[C]

She backs her scooter out into a sidewalk from an inside. Like, she's in coming out of sliding glass doors and she's backing. Oh, the. The garage door that. That keeps the security gates dropping on her.

[Brady]

Oh.

[C]

Oh, call the. The genie and Tasha. This is not good. Oh, she's trapped.

[Dick Toledo]

Her remote isn't working.

[C]

Oh, she's trying to get her Bluetooth to raise the gate, and she is trapped. Her neck. It's falling onto the back of her neck. Why is danger?

[Brady]

I don't know, but this move's not good.

[C]

Oh, she trying to slide sideways, and the gate just keeps coming down. Oh, is anything going to fix? Oh, she's getting lower, and the gate just keeps squishing her against that little moped she rides. Well, that'll teach you to park a bike indoors. Oh, she's now between the gate and just go forward. Go forward. Oh, it's down on her legs now. This is taking forever to kill her out of there. She's out.

[D]

Wow, she made it.

[C]

Wow. See, ladies, that's the benefits of being thin. A big woman wouldn't have survived that. She got. She got to squeeze out of there because she's in shape.

[Brady]

Last one's a trampoline accident. He's double bouncing with dude to do a bunch of flips.

[C]

He's got two guys on a trampoline. Doesn't. Whoa. Oh, he flips right off and lands on the internally decapitated. People shouldn't be allowed to have trampolines. That guy's dead. He does a trip. He does. How many do 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 flips before his back hits the side of the trampoline?

[D]

Five and a half.

[C]

Four and a half. Really? He's going for a five. Oh, the dismount was not good. And I think his friend falling down in the landing pad made him kind of float. Okay.

[John Holmberg]

John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brady]

Sean Nemmer sent me this.

[C]

He's listening. Oh, okay.

[Dick Toledo]

Blame it on him. This is.

[C]

This is a monkey pooping in his hand, and he's at a zoo, and he starts to eat it. Yeah, I've seen this at the zoo. And per, like, live. They eat their own poop fresh out of the box. All right, thank you.

[Brady]

That's a mouthful.

[C]

That's it.

[Brady]

That's it.

[C]

All that.

[Dick Toledo]

So you could say it's a mouthful.

[E]

That's a mouthful.

[Brady]

That stinks. Toledo.

[C]

No.

[Dick Toledo]

Shouldn't have set him up.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. You shouldn't. You encouraged it. Kirby's not in school for another 10 minutes. He's going to get the best of no today. Oh, Jesus Christ. No wonder it's the best of Daddy. Yeah. That was my favorite thing in the Albuquerque Zoo ever. Gorilla came out with a big. Looked like he scooped out the inside of a pumpkin. It was so orange. He's just holding it and a guy goes, run. He's gonna throw it. We all ran. And then he just devoured it, like slowly. Just mashed it into his mouth. You want to see? You know, and that's the thing about another thing about like that people get upset. Like zoos. You want to see them in their natural habitat. There it is. That's what they do.

[E]

We don't need that part of it. Can't you train them not to do that?

[C]

What's natural about that? Stop feeding the gorillas pumpkins and maybe you won't have that problem.

[Brady]

Yeah, they don't do that once in a while.

[C]

Eat pumpkins?

[Brady]

No.

[C]

Throw in their poo, maybe. You don't know.

[Brady]

It's kind of a unlearned thing. They're like, get me out of this.

[C]

I think they. I think they do fling their poo. That's probably a move they make against each other. It's the only thing they got. I would imagine that's a very natural thing for them. They eat it. They didn't learn that in the zoo.

[Brady]

Funniest one I saw was that Grandma's in the wheelchair and they're all watching the.

[C]

And it flung it.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[C]

Smack.

[Brady]

Can't move.

[C]

That is funny. Just that phrase right there. Grandma can't move. Let's roll her over the monkey cage. Let's roll over to the monkey cage and let him. Let's see what happens. Stationary grandma and a monkey with ibs. I'm all in. Give him a little Ex Lax and let's see how long till Grandma's coated.

[E]

It reminds me of the 70s. Oh, I'm just covered in feces, full of drugs.

[C]

Brett, what do you got?

[D]

All right, this one's we'll do quick today.

[C]

First one up is walking down. CCTV lady walking down the street, couple of dogs. She's loading up a Buick. This is a terrible. Oh, and then a guy. The guy gets walking back to the.

[Dick Toledo]

Car and rolled up against.

[C]

Oh, my God. And somebody doesn't give him any space at all and hits him right into his own. He's pulled over far enough.

[Brady]

That's a hit right here.

[E]

Gang.

[C]

Him. That's a murder. All right, you're canceled for a little while.

[D]

Take the rest of the day.

[C]

Off you go. You know what? You go home and play with Kirby with your Kirby jokes today. Gangham style. Don't laugh at it.

[D]

It's so stupid.

[C]

I know.

[D]

All right, and let's have a history lesson. And in 70s or early 80s porn.

[C]

Okay, we got the wood panel walls. It is definitely 70s related. Down south.

[D]

My God, there's a lot of hair.

[C]

Oh, she's only got one leg. She's got a nub mid shin. She's draped it over this guy's thigh. Oh, she can use it like a hand. Oh, she can use it like. Ah. She's lubing up the nub in the 70s. No, people didn't do this in the 70. Oh, there's a 70s butt with a 70s born nub. This isn't. This wasn't supposed to happen till the Internet got invented.

[John Holmberg]

Come on.

[C]

Wow. From the knee down.

[D]

And she's pledging herself too, at the same time.

[C]

And she is rubbing Buckwheat's head because she's got more hair than I've ever seen. Oh, this dude is taking full calf. Cut it up. Cut off your foot about seven inches. Seven inches above your foot. And that's where she's at with that, where your calf goes. And it's in that dude's bottom. And it's during the Carter administration. That wasn't supposed to happen back then.

[D]

That's from a newcomer today. That was from Andres Andreas.

[C]

Was that the 50th anniversary of SNL? Was that one of their first sketches? Oh, my God. I did not expect that at all. When she came hopping in the room with that giant bush, I thought something drastically different was going to happen. Those people in that are our parents age. Brett. Yep.

[D]

That means upper nub and went to town.

[C]

That means they were capable of stuff like that. Oh, Lubin Nub. Wow.

[D]

Oh, I hope that's when it doesn't come back. I mean, you know, we've.

[C]

Well, there's an Internet thing about that. That was. That has to be. They're like. They're like the Jackie Robinson of nub porn. That's. They're the first. Nobody did that before on film. They're the first ones. They are the Wright brothers of half a foot in your ass. The amputee porn. You're looking right at the Amelia Earhart. Lindbergh. Oh, Thomas Edison started. Everything started. And they filmed it. Yeah. So it's there for. They Worked on it. And they said people need to know about this for forever. Like those stamps. Anyway. Yikes.

[Brady]

That happened a long time ago.

[C]

Oh, right, Brady. Like the mountain ranges of Sacramento. Callback. Sutter Farm is close to Sacramento. So, I mean, maybe they're tied together somehow. It's 827. There you go. That was awful. And only because I know both of those people are in their 70s now, and they've. They've got that they're not alive. You don't think amputees live that long?

[Brady]

No.

[C]

All right. I'm guessing you're right. The dude died of aids.

[D]

Cooked up seven.

[C]

There's no way that dude didn't. And he. He had AIDS before. It was. It was gay cancer when he had it. She may have survived because you can't get warts on your calf, I don't think.

[D]

Or can you?

[C]

Can you? I don't. If there's someone that would know, it would be her. Oh.

[D]

That may be a top tenner for the year.

[C]

That was that the tibula. That's the bone running down your shin there. Fibula, femur.

[Dick Toledo]

Fibula is up, right?

[C]

Fibula, tibula. I don't know which one saves the day. It goes towards the ankle. That's when they cut it off. Either way. Either way. It was proper size for that gentleman.

[Brady]

Started as a high ankle.

[C]

That guy was like, sure, put it in there. It's the seventies. No one's ever done this before. She's the Amelia Earhart of amputee anal rape. And we now have seen it. I've seen too much. I want to be more like my grandpa Alvar. I know. Too much. He lived a simpler life. He had polio, and his one arm was smaller than the other. And I don't think he ever nubbed my grandma with it. I think it was pretty much off limits. Don't touch it during sex. It's a reminder of a worst time in his life.

[Brady]

Like, the guy's opener. Like, oh, no. Didn't he say that right off the bat?

[C]

Him?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, she. He was naked and in bed. Play it again, Brett. Does he say, oh, no?

[Brady]

No.

[C]

If he says, oh, no, He's. He's not putting up much of a fight because he's on his back to start, and then he rolls over and definitely is accommodating towards the idea of a leg going.

[Brady]

Yeah, he got into.

[C]

He was into it really fast. She. She loved now while. While. And she's easy to run away from. So if he says, oh, no, here comes Hopalong let's see what he says to start. I'm back. You ready for this?

[D]

My God.

[C]

Oh, my God. So it's euphoric.

[Dick Toledo]

She's got it folded up against your back.

[C]

Yeah, well, she hopped in.

[D]

Clearly, her leg was flaccid.

[C]

There's no bone in there. Hey, I don' know, It's.

[D]

It's moving.

[C]

Curved. He's lubing it up. It's shaped like a big one.

[D]

I like the soundtrack a little bit.

[C]

My own. My own, my. Give it all you got. Oh, man. We're watching it again.

[D]

We got to show this one to Dale.

[C]

Yeah. She goes into. Until the calf starts getting a little thick. And then. And then in this. Back in the 90s, she could have gone to the knee. Today she'd go all the way up to the hip. But back then, you could only go from cut off ankle to mid calf before the guy would explode. 70s bodies weren't built for that. That. That was Darwin over the last 40 years of wonder how she lost her leg. Maybe that dude. Maybe one of the dudes had a Clinched it up and snapped it off some dude with a foot.

[Brady]

He did it. Just for that, we could make some money.

[C]

Oh, man. And no one in the 70s would have been like, yeah, we can. You bet. Boy, that's an untapped market. You shoving your leg in my ass. Nah, you're. And then for. For no reason at all. The whole video starts with her giving him a mouth hug.

[D]

Well, it's because she's using her nub to.

[C]

I know, but I know she. I know. That's enough. Oh, my God. He's. He's in heaven about to get leg. Okay. Happy President's day, everybody. That was in the United States too. Or maybe Canada. Let's say that's Canadian. That was a Canadian video. Those weirdos had nothing to do. It's probably freezing outside. And they figured it out. That's it. The Brady report is over.

[John Holmberg]

It's 98 Holmberg's Morning Sickness. The 98 K U PD Homeberg's Morning Sickness.

[C]

Linkin park in the news this week, too is Chester Bennington's son has come out as transgender. But I don't know where that started. I have to know. I don't know. Was it a son first, now it's a daughter or was it a daughter now it's. I don't know either way. Not my math to do. But they made a big deal out of that on the news this weekend, too. Also, we watched that one legged porn Just a second ago, from the 70s, Scott Haynes just emailed over and he goes, you know, Paul McCartney probably did that because he had that one legged wife for a while.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

If you had a one legged wife or an amputee, spouse or partner.

[Dick Toledo]

Did we ever look up Heather Mills? Was she like that girl, though?

[C]

Take a look.

[Dick Toledo]

Did she have the Heather Mills?

[C]

You'd play with the nub.

[Dick Toledo]

The. What do you call that? The tactile.

[C]

Huh?

[Dick Toledo]

Dactyl.

[C]

Tactile. Dactyl.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't know.

[C]

Tactile. Prehensile. That's a tail.

[Dick Toledo]

Whatever I'm trying to get.

[D]

Well, that too.

[C]

If she had a tail, we'd definitely play with that. Definitely. No chick breaks out a tail. We're playing with the tail. The tail's going in Toledo.

[Brady]

She might be below. Like it's a.

[C]

Let's see. Heather Mills. Oh, no.

[Brady]

It'd be big, but big.

[C]

I don't know.

[Brady]

Although it is.

[C]

It's a big portion.

[Brady]

It looks sharpened off at the end there.

[C]

That's right. They've dremeled it down. Turn it into a pixie stick or a swizzle. That's a nub. All right. Ah, McCartney probably dabbled. Go ahead, put it in the old back door.

[D]

That'd be a hell of a shot, though.

[C]

That's a shot to the system. Oh, man.

[E]

All right.

[C]

You're leaning into it, though.

[E]

You're not.

[C]

Not.

[D]

That would mean McCartney's Rosebudden.

[C]

Oh.

[Brady]

With that.

[C]

But come on. There's things. He's a beetle. There was stuff he did that nobody likes to talk about. But those times in India and all that heroin. And then he marries an amputee. If you get an amputee, you play with it. Mathias.

[D]

What?

[C]

Nubs up.

[D]

I'm out.

[C]

All right, me too. But I mean, I'm just saying. Let's just say we. Let's just say we're not gross and we stuck around. Okay. Or we are gross.

[Brady]

You're not dabbling.

[C]

You dabble.

[Dick Toledo]

No.

[C]

You dabble.

[D]

Absolutely not.

[C]

You'd make her do it.

[D]

No.

[C]

You'd see if you could fold it up into something. Or maybe use it on another girl.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

No, not on you. No. It's not going in. Excellent.

[D]

I'm not a man.

[C]

What if it was like the one we saw?

[D]

Absolutely not.

[C]

I would. I'm with somebody who's missing parts. We're gonna use that.

[D]

I wouldn't be with somebody.

[C]

I wouldn't either, so it doesn't matter. Me, too.

[D]

It is a me too thing.

[C]

But she's gonna wanna with somebody else, right? I'm just saying. All right, so Brett's made his case clear. Brady. No, you're not doing that. Because I'm telling you exactly what would happen if you had a nub.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[C]

Who did that?

[Brady]

I think that was Brad, actually.

[C]

Was that Brady or Brad? It wasn't me.

[E]

Hold on.

[C]

So you know, again, as guys, we nub up our bodies. We're using it. Yeah.

[Brady]

There's.

[C]

There's a hundred percent chance you're not. You're sexualizing that nub. Especially packing what you're packing. You got a forearm instead.

[E]

Let me just. Let me throw the nuke at her. This is the appetizer. Here comes the main course.

[C]

You're doing it too. What?

[D]

To who?

[C]

You're breaking. You. You lose half your arm and nub up to myself, maybe, but no. All right. But someone else. Oh, you're using. Look at those guys. We're all doing it. It's unfair to think the other way, boys. It's rude. So if she's got one, you know, be a decent human being, reciprocate. See what she's got. I don't know if I jumped right into that Heather Mills thing. That's like going to blacks.com as a virgin. She's got a big knob trauma.

[Dick Toledo]

Did she not use a prosthetic during Dancing with the Stars?

[Brady]

Yeah, she did.

[C]

Flew off.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, it flew up.

[C]

Because it looks like.

[D]

No, there's one hanging. There's. There's a nub hanging there.

[Dick Toledo]

Okay.

[C]

I think we might be looking at some photos.

[Dick Toledo]

No, it's. I see it. I see the nub.

[C]

The nub.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah. Or is that a light?

[Brady]

No, there's both legs.

[C]

They're both accountable, are they?

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, they are.

[C]

She didn't do well anyway, so. Don't bring that up. Don't make me think of the sweet, sweet 79, 80 year old Paul McCartney nubbing up.

[D]

Like you said, he was a beetle.

[C]

He's a beetle. He did a lot of weird stuff. He was not saying no a lot. There was some Beetle man piles going on, as open as Lennon was. If John Lennon was alive today, people would hate him. Half the country would hate him. He'd be an MSNBC every day. I just think we all have to be more progressive. What is gender anyway? He'd be. He'd be first one in on that. Is that Heather Mills right there? Apparently, yeah. I'd look past it once from the knees up. She better keep her hair and makeup going, though, because the second I see her au natural and the nub. No offense to you nubs out there. But you, you got to make up for it in other ways.

[D]

I just think of the sopranos where they. Where Janice stole the leg.

[C]

Yep, exactly. I mean, I already know my face should have a prosthetic on it. I get that. But I make up for it. And engaging conversation and incredible charm. If I was missing a leg, you know, you know, charming I'd be with this face and a missing leg. Good lord, I'd melt you like. Like sugar and water. We already surpassed our time for the Guadalupe replace. That means we're putting in too much effort today on this half ass holiday workday. We got what would Brady do? Coming up next.

[John Holmberg]

It's 98, Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.