02-17-26 - Entertainment Drill - MIX - 3x - Gay Porn Star Offers Bieber 2Mil For Scene

Summary

Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness (February 17, 2026) continues the show's signature blend of entertainment news, irreverent humor, and unfiltered takes on the wildest stories in pop culture. The crew—John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo—leans especially hard into the absurd, riffing on everything from Sylvester Stallone’s dog saga to gay porn star Johnny Rapid’s headline-grabbing offer to Justin Bieber. There’s also time for wild speculation about rock band drama, pointed Cosby jokes, Billy Bob Thornton’s candidness, and even a bizarre detour involving Honey Boo Boo’s family.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sylvester Stallone’s Dog Drama

• Summary: The episode opens with jokes about Sylvester Stallone’s dog, Phoebe, being killed by a coyote. The hosts riff on what a revenge-fueled Stallone movie about the event might look like.
  • Memorable Quote:
    • “If you could find Shane D. I'll give you $10,000. You know, he took my dog. You know, I don't like that.” (A as Stallone, [01:38])
  • The crew jokes about Stallone's potential for a Taken-style movie, with Stallone delivering lines in his trademark mumble.

2. Queen’srÿche Band Drama

• Summary: The hosts discuss the confusion around two bands both touring and recording under the name Queen'srÿche—one with original vocalist Jeff Tate, and one without him.
  • “Both bands can use the name because nobody cares. Chaos is sorted out.” (B, [03:01])
  • They play a sample of the new Queen’srÿche lineup, poking fun at the Italian roots of the new singer and musing about the futility of bands replacing iconic singers with sound-alikes.

3. Bill Cosby’s Upcoming Comedy Shows

• Summary: Bill Cosby's planned stand-up gigs in Denver lead to a relentless roast, with the crew lampooning his public statement and sick jokes about his legacy.
  • Memorable Quote:
    • “Does that mean he's far from finished? He plans to rape some more or he's far from finished with his career?” (A, [05:31])
  • They parody Cosby’s sleep medication pitches and revisit decades-old Cosby routines, mingling dark humor with pop culture critique.

4. Gay Porn Star Offers Bieber $2 Million

• Summary: The panel cracks up over the headline that porn actor Johnny Rapid offered Justin Bieber $2 million to film a scene.
  • They engage in a back-and-forth about whether porn cash-outs are realistic and joke about their own suitability for such “work.”
  • Memorable Quote:
    • “It's that same argument. It's like he's a gay porn star. He's probably in great shape. And we're like, wait a minute. I can be a gay porn star. Yeah, but not one people want to see.” (A, [08:28])

5. Billy Bob Thornton’s TMI Moment

• Summary: Billy Bob Thornton is caught by paparazzi and offers excessively candid comments on sex during menstruation, inspiring a series of graphic and outlandish riffs from the crew.
  • “Let me show you something. Right now. My wiener is bright red.” (A as Billy Bob, [09:12])
  • They improvise a string of grotesque metaphors and spin-off movie titles, like “There Will Be Blood 2: Blood on My Pants.”

6. Honey Boo Boo’s Uncle Poodle Scandal

• Summary: The discussion moves into reality TV tabloid territory, with news that Honey Boo Boo’s Uncle Poodle attempted to sell risqué photos via Grindr.
  • The hosts mock the value and marketability of such photos:
  • “Give me five dollars for pictures of the gay Honey Boo boo. Uncle Dick. $5? That's asinine.” (A, [11:08])

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Stallone’s Next Movie:

  • “I catch a chicken, I catch a coyote. Yo, you know what you going to do?” (A, [02:06])

• On Queen’srÿche Band Split:

  • “I'll take the one without him. Both called Queens Reich.” (A, [02:26])

• On Cosby’s Comeback:

  • “I'm far from finished.” (B quoting Cosby, [05:27])
  • “He said that?” (A, [05:27])
  • “Does that mean he's far from finished? He plans to rape some more or he’s far from finished with his career?” (A, [05:31])

• On Gay Porn Offer to Bieber:

  • “You assume that just because he's doing gay sex that you're going to make $2 million if you do it too. But he's probably in great shape and has a huge dong.” (A, [07:21])

• On Billy Bob’s Honesty:

  • “I just nailed a plate of bolognese, you know what I mean? Looks like I got into a fight in an Italian restaurant from the waist down.” (A as Billy Bob, [09:21])

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:15] – Stallone’s dog story and revenge-movie parody
• [02:12] – Queen’srÿche’s dual-band legal drama & song sample
• [04:45] – Bill Cosby’s statement and extended lampooning
• [06:51] – “Entertainment Drill” headline about Johnny Rapid’s offer to Bieber, leading into adult industry banter
• [09:05] – Billy Bob Thornton’s comments on sex during menstruation; increasingly graphic riffs
• [10:45] – Honey Boo Boo’s Uncle Poodle attempts to sell Grindr nudes; hosts imagine a bidding war

---

Tone & Style

The episode is brash, cynical, and not for the easily offended, leaning into dark comedy and satire on all topics. The hosts maintain a conversational, improvisational energy—often pushing jokes to intentionally awkward extremes. They encourage each other’s wildest riffs, always opting for the most outrageous punchlines.

---

Conclusion

This episode delivers the crass but quick-witted commentary listeners expect from Holmberg's Morning Sickness, covering everything from celebrity pets and band feuds to adult-industry headlines and tabloid scandals. For those who thrive on pop culture gossip, left-field jokes, and irreverent camaraderie, this segment is packed with all the twisted laughs you could want.

Transcript

[A]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought.

[B]

To you by mmpguns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories this President's Day. If you're shopping for a new truck, suv, electric vehicle, or crossover, you owe it to yourself to check out your Valley Chevy dealers during the President's Day sales event. Live life bigger in a Traverse or the roomy and dependable tracks where versatility meets agility, or the Silverado or Colorado trucks that fit your lifestyle. Don't miss your chance to drive yours away this President's Day. See your Valley Chevy dealers or visit valleychevy.com for the President's Day sales event going on now. Together. Let's drive.

[A]

Hey, it's Brett Vesely and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited.

[B]

What's the best way for him to do that? Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into MMP Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wrong hands.

[A]

Okay, but what if he lives out of state?

[B]

Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it all online. It's really that simple.

[A]

There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and.

[B]

Legal way to sell your firearms.

[A]

What the do you think you're doing? It's the best of Homburg's morning sickness on the big red radio.

[B]

Sylvester Stallone's dog Phoebe.

[A]

Literally. Literally. It's two. He's got poopy shoes and they're high heels. Poopy pumps. He's wearing poopy pumps.

[B]

Sylvester Stallone's dog Phoebe was killed by a coyote. Phoebe went missing a few weeks ago, and the family went searching. They put up flyers in the neighborhood. Ten thousand dollar reward.

[A]

If you could find Shane D. I'll give you $10,000. You know, you know, he took my dog. You know, I don't like that.

[B]

I think I know the plot of his next movie.

[A]

I kind of wanted him to be, you know, pretty. You know, you got a guy out there like a coyote, like Oliver Rkin Larson, and he comes on and kills your dog. You got to get back at that guy, right?

[B]

What do you think about making this taken three?

[A]

Yeah, you know, I had a specialized set of skills. You know, I like to take that out on people. You know, guy comes by, I'm going have to hunt down some coyotes.

[B]

Phoebe.

[A]

I catch a chicken, I catch a coyote. Yo, you know what you going to do?

[B]

Get the coyote rock.

[A]

Yo, you t dance in my attic.

[B]

This year there are two different Queen's Reich albums. Oh. One with Jeff Tate and the other without him. Both releasing new albums and touring.

[A]

I'll take the one without him. Both called Queens Reich.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So nobody really owns the name.

[B]

I guess so.

[A]

Unless they got a singer that sounds like they will. Either one of them.

[B]

So they'll have to say with Jeff tate on the one, don't you think? If you're. Or just queens.

[A]

Right. 2.0. Do you think the. The fake Queen dreg singer has like a jean jacket with cutoff sleeves? Oh, yeah. Yep. The floppy weird hair.

[B]

Jeff Tate's been replaced by Todd Latore.

[A]

Do we have a taste of the new Queens Reich there? Toledo with Todd Latore.

[B]

Yeah. The court and the judge ruled that both bands can use the name because nobody cares. Chaos is sorted out.

[A]

He's actually an Italian. And so Operation. Operation Mind the crime. Mind the crime. Oh, and good news Walks the streets Got the blood in his hands the brother killed the brother for the prophet of another game Point. Nobody wins. Ah, that is different. He's good. I like it. Did he say that guy? Did he say damn thing? This is a teaser trailer. This is not Jeff Tate.

[B]

Oh, he finishes up his guitar solo. This guy over here.

[A]

Black guy trapped again. Oh, my God. Is he all right? It's even worse. That one's not as bad. It's very Jeff Taty, though. New powerhouse. If you're really mad at Jeff Tate.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why get a guy? I'll get a guy. Sounds just like him. Why in the world would you do that?

[B]

Just. Well, you should hear tape. Now.

[A]

He'S droopy dog. As I lay next to you Silent lucidity. I think they should have gone hard. I go hard. Heavy Italian.

[B]

Look, Jeff, it's time we.

[A]

What do we need to know? Shingle Queen drank. That's all right.

[B]

Bill Cosby issued a statement about the two shows he's doing tomorrow in Denver. Says I have thousands of loyal, patient and courageous fans that are going to leave their homes to enjoy an evening of laughter and return home feeling wonderful. I'm ready.

[A]

Drinks. You see what's the new show policies will give everybody a free beverage with the show. And then you come in and you get the pee pee. And the poo poo will be for one of the tables that pays a Little extra.

[B]

You see, I thank you, the theater staff, the event organizers and the Colorado community for your continued support and coming to experience family fun entertainment.

[A]

Hey, hey, hey.

[B]

I'm far from finished.

[A]

He said that?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

He threw a little Fat Albert in the air.

[B]

Yes, he did.

[A]

Does that mean he's far from finished? He plans to rape some more or he's far from finished with his career?

[B]

I think.

[A]

Yeah, we didn't start everything.

[B]

I think it's everything.

[A]

I think I'll rape again today. Oh, Fat Albert, you like school on Saturday? No, clown. Shut up before I shut you up with my big wing. Take this pill. Take a sip of this. I ain't drinking out your canteen again. Last time I drank out your canteen, my ass hurt for two weeks. That's kind of. That's kind of funny. He's gonna force himself upon us just like he did those women. Yep. We don't want your comedy anymore. You say you're gonna get the bid. The dentist bitch is coming your direction now. You see Far bedar burble flarn. His whole life's just raping people.

[B]

I believe it's gonna branch into other businesses. Cosby Sleep Center.

[A]

Hi folks, it's Bill Cosby. Here you can struggling to have a good night's sleep. We'll come to the Bill Cosby Sleep Center. You see, Take a sip of the Bill Cosby special purple juice.

[B]

You'll wake up refreshed.

[A]

Poppies. Poppies.

[B]

Sleep.

[A]

Poor Bill Cottage.

[B]

Soothing.

[A]

I don't want to see it anymore. Abecabit feeble. Maba libeth. I've seen this. It's a 40 year old bit. Smobuk Smobeck. Yes. You're at the dentist. We know. They've advanced technology so much, there's no more fire at the dentist.

[B]

Gay porno star Johnny Rapid.

[A]

That's not a good gay porno name.

[B]

He's offering Justin Bieber $2 million to do a scene with him.

[A]

2 million?

[B]

You got 2 million? Amp it up, Justin. It'll be easy. I'll do most of the work. Come in for a few hours.

[A]

Wait a minute. Yeah, that's pretty good. What am I doing wrong? Yeah, that's fetish. Well, I'll tell you what you're doing wrong. I'll show you on the Internet what you could be doing for millions of dollars. Made that kind of dough, there's no way he's got $2 million. But again, here we go. Here we go. Back to that argument again. You assume that just because he's doing gay sex that you're going to make $2 million if you do it too. But he's probably in great shape and has a huge dong. I'll work out eight hours a day. There you go. For 2 million bucks, that's a little bit overkill. Eight hours, but you're going to need it. You're a little fatigued at the end of that.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Get yourself back in shape. Scale her back to like two hours a day and then whip out that angry inch and you're still not going to make $200 million or whatever. He's got to you, John. I'll show you. Go do it. Go. You show me motivation. You go become a gay po. I don't think you can do it. I'll show you. Slam the door for me. Oh, sorry. I want Eric to go be a gay porn star. Despite me. This argument is lost on him.

[B]

Despite me.

[A]

Who's the real winner? When I sit back and watch and go, well, God damn it, you did it. And here I am looking at it. Who's the loser now? I got $2 million, but my ass. It's better than this. I'm going to poke my eyes out. I just watched incredibly shapely Eric o' Connell have sex.

[B]

He did it.

[A]

But it is. It's that same argument. It's like he's a gay porn star. He's probably in great shape. And we're like, wait a minute. I can be a gay porn star. Yeah, but not one people want to see. There's a difference. You got to be aesthetically pleasing.

[B]

Check out Johnny Rapid.

[A]

He's a good looking dude. Yeah, let's see. I can match Johnny Rap. I beat him on time. I'd be Johnny Moderate Johnny Decent time Johnny Somewhat Johnny. Getting there.

[B]

The paparazzi ran into Billy Bob Thornton, bbt and asked his opinion on having sex during a woman's monthly visitor.

[A]

Oh, God. Who asked? Bbt?

[B]

Normally I don't divulge this kind of information, but you know, I've never been shy.

[A]

Let me show you something. Right now. My wiener is bright red.

[B]

He also lower back tattoos on guys are stupid.

[A]

I just nailed a plate of bolognese, you know what I mean? Looks like I got into a fight in an Italian restaurant from the waist down.

[B]

Percy's lovely bride, Courtney Stodden.

[A]

Not done yet. It looks like the Kool Aid man gave me a bj.

[B]

Oh yeah.

[A]

Any more questions? Tmz.

[B]

Thanks bbt.

[A]

No problem. I haven't seen him in anything. He doesn't do anything anymore. He Just wanders around with blood all over his pants. Evidently.

[B]

I think he'd argue with that.

[A]

I still have my band. Yeah, that's true. I do tour the band.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

Just because you haven't seen Tom Petty around doesn't mean he's not writing.

[B]

Good point.

[A]

Oh, Eric, I don't even remember your song. I'm sorry. If I had the power of creating flint and Tinder out of air, I would have burst you into flames.

[B]

See you later, bbt.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Courtney stodden.

[A]

Hey, Brady. It's day 27 over at your house, isn't it?

[B]

It is.

[A]

Oh, you can smell it for me. See you tomorrow. I'm like a shark.

[B]

I am.

[A]

Great, whitest, menstruous.

[B]

The Thornton Thrasher shark. Whoa. Pungent.

[A]

Oh. I'm Brady's hand. Blood and pork. Oh, my God. We're late. We're done.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Nice job. That's good. I'll do it.

[B]

It's good stuff.

[A]

Can't have any more of this.

[B]

Photos of Honey Boo Boo's uncle.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Uncle Poodle.

[A]

He's dead, isn't he? Oh, he's got the hiv.

[B]

He sent some gay pics to someone at the Grinder, and now the guy wants to sell him.

[A]

And how much are you gonna get for that? The naked? I don't know. They get to sell them. How much?

[B]

The pictures over to the guy and says. So you know who Honey Boo Boo is? That's my niece.

[A]

And this is me on my knees. This is my piece. I'll give you five bucks. Give me five dollars for pictures of the gay Honey Boo boo. Uncle Dick. $5? That's asinine.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

To the highest bidder by four. That hobo over there wanted to give me a dollar. Did you say ass? Just found out that that thing wasn't menstruating, so give you one American dollar for it. Would you bang Honey Boo Boo's mom? Yep. Every 28 days. Roll her in flower and look for the red spot. She's like the opposite of Angelina Jolie. Yes, she is. Yep. Well, it would look. I actually did eat Angelina Jolie, and it looks like she did, too. We got that in common. I'm gonna redo a movie. I'm doing a sequel you guys don't know about. Yeah, it's called There will be blood 2 blood on my Pants. Who's the female lead? And now it doesn't matter. Some girl's menstruating. It changes every 28 days of filming. And we're gonna do a Sling Blood. Reprase my character, Carl the Blood Santa. Yeah, Bloody Santa. I like that. And then of course, the bad news. Bloody Bears. How would they have issues? That girl pitcher was about 14. Oh, yeah, that's right. Mandel Horlitzer. So it'd be Bloody Bear. Yeah, probably. There's mothers. Billy Bob likes menstruation too much. And then I'm gonna do a buddy picture reprising my role as Carl from Sling Blade with the great Sylvester Stallone as John Rambo. And First Blood again. That makes perfect sense with Amanda Wolitzer. Amanda Wolitzer. I'm just gonna reprise the whole thing like a Billy Bob reunion. I won't even tell you what Primary Colors is called. Billy Bob, get out. You got it. Arizona's most powerful rocket in your station. It's out of control now. 88. Okay, you P.D.

[B]

It'S Brady for Game Day Men's Health, the valley's largest men's health clinic with 12 locations. You should schedule a complimentary appointment today. Go to gamedaymenshealth.com Every location has a cool man cave environment. You'll sit down with a board certified medical director and figure out what treatments that can help you. They have an on site lab and you will know what your testosterone level is during your first meeting, do what thousands of Phoenix area men are doing by going to gamedaymen's health.com and schedule your complimentary appointment. You got to get back in the game with Game Day Men's Health. All right, HMS Podcast cast, time again.

[A]

To let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Downtown and stand up live.

[B]

Get out and see the comedy of Moshe Casher and the up and coming Ari Maddie.

[A]

Up north at Desert Ridge, you'll get.

[B]

Josh Wolf and SNL's Tommy Brennan. And Eastside at the Tempe Improv. Don't miss the very funny Sam J. And more Josh Wolf. For the complete lineups and for Tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com.