02-18-26 - Brady Report - Mar 2003 - God Takes Form Of Fish - Soldier Named Optimus Prime - Vomit Protest In San Fran - BO

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Brady Report (Feb 18, 2026)

Main Theme:
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness revolves around satirical and offbeat news stories delivered in the irreverent style of the crew. Hosts John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo, and guests riff on bizarre headlines, military news, anti-war protests, bodily oddities, and outlandish human behavior, all while poking fun at society, media, and each other.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Soldier Named "Optimus Prime"

• Discussion kicks off with news of an Ohio National Guardsman who legally changed his name to Optimus Prime
  • Optimus Prime, named on his 30th birthday, has been called up for active duty.
  • The crew jokes the US will win the war thanks to a Transformer in service.
  • Pentagon general found the name change amusing, expressing excitement at having the "commander of the Autobots" in the National Guard.
  • Quote:
    • Co-host: "Optimus Prime is going to the Gulf to protect the world." (01:55)

2. Satirical "Saddam Hussein Weekend Plans" List

• A comedic riff on what Saddam Hussein might have planned
  • Fake personal ad: "Recently exiled maniacal dictator seeking long-term relationship. No smokers or Jews." (03:23)
  • Invade France, tea with Osama, and "book a room on the eighth level of hell."

3. US vs. British Military Privileges

• Contrast between U.S. troops' lack of basics and British sailors' luxuries
  • British Navy had a fully-stocked ship bar, sailors received three beers a day.
  • Brady quips that the American military doesn't get even toilet paper, while the Brits party.
  • Quote:
    • Brady: "Our guys can't get toilet paper and the Brits have a bar." (04:11)

4. War Merchandise Satire

• Novelty items inspired by the conflict
  • Send white flags with "I surrender" buttons to Iraq via SlyCraft (05:02)
  • "Saddam soap"—soap on a rope with Saddam’s face to "rub all over evil dictator all over your genitalia" (05:03, 05:18)

5. San Francisco Anti-War Protest: The 'Vomit-In'

• Bizarre method of protest where activists intentionally vomited in the streets
  • Quote:
    • Co-host: "Some crazy hippies... made themselves throw up in the streets. Really jammed up traffic." (06:16)
  • Hosts joke about sending protestors to Iraq.

6. Big Mac Obsession Milestone

• Don Gorski eats his 19,000th Big Mac
  • Since 1972, two Big Macs, large fries, and Coke per day.
  • Crew calculates 594 lbs of cheese, 105 gal. special sauce, 15 cows (07:04–07:26)
  • Amused disbelief at his relatively modest size (6’0”, 180 lbs).

7. Affair Gone Wrong in Italy

• A dramatic, tabloid-style story
  • Man calls police after wife goes missing at club; she's found cheating, husband then assaults her (07:36–08:07).

8. God Takes the Form of a Talking Fish

• Wild story of a carp in New Square, NY, that allegedly spoke Hebrew and delivered an apocalyptic message
  • Fish said: “Everyone better take account for themselves because the end is near.” (08:11)
  • Fish is clubbed to death and eaten, spawning rumors and insomnia for one participant.
  • Some believe it was God, others Satan.
  • Quote:
    • Co-host: "Both men heard it. The talking fish said, 'Tazarek, Shemaya and Hasabah,' which roughly means, 'Everyone better take account for themselves because the end is near.'" (08:54)

9. Segment on "Fish Odor Syndrome"

• Brief science explanation about Trimethylaminuria
  • Rare disorder causing people to smell strongly of fish.
  • Quote:
    • Co-host: "It's like chicken of the sea coming out of your pores." (10:19)
  • Affects 1 in 2,000 people; often causes social isolation.

10. Sweat as a Female Relaxant

• University of Pennsylvania study: Women exposed to men's underarm sweat are more relaxed
  • While not an aphrodisiac, it increases ovulation-related hormones.
  • Quote:
    • Co-host: "It made them more happier and more relaxed...it does increase the amount of ovulation going on." (11:45–12:02)
    • Brady: "So you rub sweat all over a girl and she gets all turned on." (12:02)

11. International Wackiness: Kenya & Cameroon

• Kenya: Several men die trying to retrieve a cell phone dropped in an outhouse for a $13 reward. (12:27–13:26)
  • Quote:
    • "Three guys attempted. Three guys died."
• Cameroon: Urine therapy craze
  • Drinking urine believed (falsely) to cure ailments and grow hair.
  • Government threatens to jail those who promote it.
  • Quote:
    • Co-host: "A glass of urine a day can cure hemorrhoids, ulcers, infertility, snake bites and baldness." (13:42)

12. Redneck News: "Proud to be American" Isn't the National Anthem

• Drunken rodeo attendees assault teens for not standing during Lee Greenwood's song
  • Confusion between "Proud to be American" and "The Star-Spangled Banner." (14:35)
  • Quote:
    • Brady: "There's a reason why patriotism is dangerous in this country. Because there's too many people who just don't know why they're patriotic and what to be patriotic about." (15:41)

13. Commentary on Wartime Patriotism and Media Consumption

• The group sarcastically anticipates 24-hour coverage, cheap gas, and consumer patriotism
  • Quote:
    • Brady: "We're 24 hours away from cheap gas."
    • Co-host: "That's when there's a run on bald eagles at the pet store." (16:12)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "Optimus prime is going to the Gulf to protect the world." (01:55 – Co-host)
• "No smokers or Jews is on all of his personal ads." (03:23 – Brady)
• "Our guys can't get toilet paper and the Brits have a bar." (04:11 – Brady)
• "Some crazy hippies... made themselves throw up in the streets." (06:16 – Co-host)
• "Both men heard it. The talking fish said... 'Everyone better take account for themselves because the end is near.'" (08:54 – Co-host)
• "It's like chicken of the sea coming out of your pores." (10:19 – Co-host)
• "Fish says he's got... Let's eat the fish." (10:02–10:03 – Doug Hopkins & Brady)
• "There's a reason why patriotism is dangerous in this country." (15:41 – Brady)
• "That's when there's a run on bald eagles at the pet store." (16:12 – Co-host)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:55 – Soldier named Optimus Prime deployed; Transformer jokes
• 03:23 – Satirical Saddam Hussein personal ad punchline
• 04:11 – US vs. British military luxuries
• 05:03 – Saddam soap on a rope; gag gift banter
• 06:16 – Vomit-in protest in San Francisco
• 07:04 – Big Mac milestone (Don Gorski)
• 08:11 – God takes form of carp, “godfish” story
• 10:19 – Fish odor syndrome explanation
• 12:02 – Science on female response to men's sweat
• 12:27 – Kenya outhouse cell phone deaths
• 13:42 – Cameroon urine therapy craze
• 14:35 – Redneck News: "Proud to be American" confusion
• 15:41 – Discussion on confused patriotism
• 16:12 – Bald eagles as new patriotic pets satire

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Tone and Style

The episode is marked by the hosts' irreverent, sarcastic, and playful tone, blending genuine news items with sharp social commentary, over-the-top satire, and rapid-fire quips that poke fun at current events, pop culture, patriotism, bodily gross-outs, and the absurdities of human nature.

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For listeners who missed it:
This episode is a whirlwind of comically weird news, biting mockery, and off-color humor that captures the unfiltered camaraderie of the HMS crew. If you're a fan of satirical takes on reality and raucous, no-holds-barred banter, this one's for you!

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by mmpguns.com, your most trusted.

[Commercial Announcer]

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[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmerg here from the morning sickness, and it's time to talk about Doug Hopkins of my home group and Doug Hopkins dot com. Let's talk about the people who make claims. For instance, a company out there saying they'll get you 100% of market value for your home. And a lot of times, Mr. 100% getting that inspection and says, oh, 100% just dropped because you've got a few more problems. Don't play around with these people. Trust me when I say you can trust TV's Doug Hopkins. He won't play with the offer at all. If he does, he'll give you $5,000 guaranteed. You can start to process@doug hopkins.com or grab that phone and sing.

[Brady]

Do not listen to this while driving.

[John Holmberg]

Or when full alertness is needed, the.

[Doug Hopkins]

Rest of Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

This is the Big Red radio.

[Brady]

We had the Brady Report preempted early this morning because of an Internet difficulty, and Brady's stories just weren't coming in the way he wanted. And our printer was broken and everything else. So a preempted version because of war coverage, of the worst newscast in the history of the Valley of the sun, the only newscast hosted by a man who'll just do it no matter what. That's what I say. You call him up. You say, I want to do it. It gets done.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Nice. He's gay.

[Brady]

He's giggling. It's the Brady Report. Brady, go.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

We've all been pretty confident that the US could win the war, and now we know we'll win because we've got Optimus Prime.

[Brady]

Huh?

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

There's a soldier from the Ohio National Guard and his name is Optimus Prime. He changed it for his 30th birthday, and he just got called up for active duty. Optimus prime is going to the Gulf to protect the world.

[Brady]

That's cool.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

If you don't know who the original Optimus prime was, he was a product of the 80s. Optimus prime was the leader of the Autobots on the Transformers.

[Brady]

I knew I'd heard it before. I didn't know what Optimus prime classic cartoon.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Optimus prime was a semi truck who turned into a red and blue fighting machine and then saved the world from evil deceptors to rank performers.

[Brady]

More than meets the eye.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

You may think Optimus prime is lame, but the US Military doesn't. Prime says, quote, I got a letter from the general at the Pentagon when the name change went through, and he said it was great to have the commander of the Autobots in the National.

[Brady]

Guard and we're gonna win. Now if we can goof around and do stuff like that, this will be over by Sunday afternoon.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

By the way, since Optimus prime is going out there, we've gotten a list of the top plans that Saddam Hussein what he has planned for this weekend.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Number one is duck. Two is pre taped segments of guest celebrity judge on next week's Iraqi Idol. Just in case things go out, place an Internet personal ad that reads recently exiled maniacal dictator seeking long. Yeah, that too many long term relationship. No smokers or juice.

[Brady]

No smokers or Jews is on all of his personal ads. He's putting out personal ads.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

He also says, invade France, accept their surrender. Sunday tea and goat's blood with Osama.

[Brady]

You've been doing some writing because the Internet's down. Okay.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

And finally, book room on eighth level of hell.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Brady]

Well done, Brady.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Thank you very much. We can't afford to give our soldiers any kind of AW or TP toilet paper. But the sailors in the British Navy get beer three cans a day.

[Brady]

Really?

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

They've also got a fully loaded bar on their ships where the limeys can enjoy a glass of brandy for 20 cents.

[John Holmberg]

Shut up.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

On Wednesday night, the British battleships closed their bars and stopped the beer rations. But until then, it was a big party.

[Brady]

Really? Our guys can't get toilet paper and the Brits have a bar. Well, you know why? Because they don't have to do any fighting. They just follow us.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

For the rich oil moguls in Kuwait, there's nothing as fun as war with Iraq as long as they're not the ones being invaded. So when the bombing started the other night, a bunch of wild and crazy Kuwaiti businessmen drove out to a farm near the Iraqi border and parties, as Kuwaiti moguls do, with jam sandwiches and Warm camel milk.

[Brady]

Yuck.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Our troops need your care packages. But if you feel like sponsoring a soldier of the Iraqi army, you can. Sly. Sly Craft Inc. Is selling white flags along with buttons that read I surrender. For eight bucks they'll send one to the presidential palace in Baghdad.

[Brady]

Brilliant.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

On your way home you can also get a Saddam soap. It's soap with a picture of Saddam on it. You can rub it all over evil dictator all over your genitalia if you want to do it. Because it's soap on a rope. See, you got Saddam a picture of him and he's hanging.

[Brady]

You're hanging him and then you're jamming his face into your groin. Sweetsops.com sweetsops.com I'm getting some of that.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

It's responsible. It offers a security alert soap. Scented bars that come in five colors. Low, guarded, elevated, high and severe alerts.

[Brady]

Sweet soaps.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Yeah. Sweetsops.com all right, I'm in. And then finally they can. The other thing you can send for 8 bucks is@dog poopy.com they'll send a realistic looking plastic bag of poopy to the French or German or Russian embassies.

[Brady]

Now they're booing her. National anthem. Talk about that in sports.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

I know.

[Brady]

The sweet soaps thing is good though.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

I just got a picture.

[Brady]

There's a picture of Saddam there. It's dope in a soap on a rope. It is like Jesse Jackson made it. But there you go. So you can rub Saddam's face all over your groin while you're cleaning yourself. You're killing two birds with one stone right there.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Which is great.

[Brady]

I like that. Very nice.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Sweetsops.com the fabulous media covers all this anti war movement. While yesterday San Francisco massive gridlock in the city's business centers and some of them even staged a vomit in some crazy hippies to show that the war in Iraq makes them sick. Exactly what it sounds like. They made themselves throw up in the streets. Really jammed up traffic.

[Brady]

Send them over.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Congrats.

[Brady]

Anybody round them up and send them over. It's so good there. Just go.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

They'll be yakking over there, that's for sure.

[Doug Hopkins]

I'm against the war.

[Brady]

You're disgusting.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Congratulations to 49 year old Don Gorski from Fond du Lac, Wisconsin. He ate his 19,000 Big Mac.

[Brady]

A nice job, Don. What does he weigh?

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Since 1972 he's been pounding two Big Macs and large fries and a Coke per day. He's only 6 foot 180 pounds. His cholesterol is Fine, he's bulimic. We did some math on it. That's 594 pounds of cheese, 105 gallons of special sauce and 15 cows over 32 years. Yep.

[Brady]

And two a day. No matter what. He's never like extended it. Never gone? More or less.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

He's a prison guard and he eats the same thing every day.

[Brady]

Really? Wow, that's crazy. Is that it or finally?

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Finally. In Italy, 40 year old man took his nubile 33 year old wife to a nightclub. When she disappeared, he called police thinking she must have been kidnapped. The cops put out an APB and within minutes a taxi driver called to say he just dropped her off at a hotel. So the police busted in there and found her mounting some side action. When the cops brought the evil conniving Jezebel home, her husband flew into a jealous rage and attacked her. Sona was all over the only child. Charges filed in the kidnapping was assault by her husband.

[Brady]

The guy who tried to find her in the first place. Yeah, he was immediately hired by a professional baseball team.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

We've got some good news and some bad news this morning. The good news is God has returned and he's taken the form of a 20 pound fish. The bad news is God has been clubbed to death and eaten. The story's bizarre, so hang with me. In late January, in the town of New Square, New York, 30, 30 miles north of Manhattan, two fish cutters, 57 year old Hasidic Jew named Zalman Rosen and his Christian co worker Louis Novello were preparing to slaughter a 20 pound carp when it suddenly shouted in Hebrew. Both men heard it. The talking fish said, quote Tazarek, Shemaya and Hasabah, which it roughly means. Everyone better take account for themselves because the end is near. Lewis doesn't speak Hebrew though he said he heard the fish scream and naturally Lewis assumed it was Satan. Sure, Salman and his other Hasidic Jews from around the world believe this shouting fish was God in the flesh.

[Doug Hopkins]

And he was tasty. Let me tell you. We heard God talk from the fish's belly, then we fried him up. Kosher delish. Oh the Lord himself, man. A little salty.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

You are correct, Salman and Lewis clubbed it to death, chopped it up and had it for dinner. Anyway, word of the godfish had spread around the world. Lewis can't sleep. He hasn't been able to sleep. He's been inundated with calls from believers who want to hear about the story firsthand. Meanwhile, in New square one, Abraham spits. No doubt that the Fish talked. He says two men don't dream the same dream. It's very rare. God reminds people he exists in the modern world. But when he does, you cannot ignore it. As for Lewis, he still believes the fish was Satan.

[Brady]

Yeah, I would believe the fish is Satan as well. That's why.

[Doug Hopkins]

But you gotta eat it, okay? Did you hear that, Louis? The fish says he's got.

[Brady]

Let's eat the fish.

[Doug Hopkins]

I'm with you on that.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

While you're out partying today on St Patty's Day, there is a disease out there. And this might explain for some of the stuff you come across 200 times worldwide in the last 30 years, but maybe you've encountered it. It's called fish odor syndrome.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

The real name is Trimetha Lemire Memuria. The fish odor syndrome is easier to say. So let's go with that stink box. More to the point, those who suffer from it smell like fishmongers. It's like chicken of the sea coming out of your pores. Fish odor syndrome is caused when the liver has trouble metabolizing a natural occurring chemical in the body. The result is that the pungent aroma of fish wafts from the person's sweat, urine and breath. There's no cure except trying to control the disease by cutting fish, peas and egg yolks out of your diet.

[Brady]

I don't think I've ever met someone like that.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

People suffering from fish odor syndrome often turn into hermits because the rest of society can't handle scent. Others just smoke a lot to cover it up. Doctors say fish odor syndrome is still rare, but being diagnosed more and more and as many as 1 in 2000 people have it.

[John Holmberg]

Amanda sweats a lot, but she doesn't stink.

[Brady]

She smells. Really? Her sweat smells good. You like, encourage her to sweat.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Well, good news for the ladies. The next time you're feeling stressed out, you could relief your smooth, cooling flavor of nicotine. Instead of going to the nicotine, you could just nuzzle up to a sweaty man. Biologists from the University of Pennsylvania took a sweat from underarms of men and they put it in and blended in. And the they took 18 women, little focus group. And it made them more happier and more relaxed. And while it doesn't make the minxes more hornier.

[John Holmberg]

Thanks.

[Brady]

More hornier?

[Doug Hopkins]

Yeah, sure.

[Brady]

That's exactly what it says.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

No, it says Morris Hornierist. Increase the hormones typically peaks. It does increase the amount of ovulation going on.

[Brady]

So you rub sweat all over a girl and she gets all turned on.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

It doesn't smell too bad. According to the ladies. They said they thought they were sniffing alcohol, perfume or lemon floral wax.

[Brady]

Really?

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Lemon floor wax. What do they take the sweat from Mr. Clean? Who sweats lemon fresh floor wax smell?

[Commercial Announcer]

We do, I guess.

[Brady]

Yes, I do.

[John Holmberg]

Come here, Amanda, and smell this.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Two more reasons why it doesn't suck to live in Kenya. Over half the population lives on less than a dollar a day. If you're rich. If you're a rich canyon with no soul, you can pay a man 13 bucks to jump into a bit of steaming dookie to rescue your cell phone. Oh, and that's exactly what happened. A woman dropped her cell phone down in the pit of a large outhouse and offered $13 to anyone who would recover it. Three guys attempted. Three guys died.

[Brady]

They all died in the feet first.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

One went down a ladder into the stinky pit and never came back. So a second canyon went in there. He slipped and fell and drowned. A third man went in just to save the other two heroes, but he was knocked out by the fumes. Witnesses managed to drag him out, but it was too late. He died on the way to the hospital. Check this. Even after the three men died in the pit of dookie, a fourth guy was going to jump in, but police stopped him.

[Caller or Guest]

I got not dragon man. I own the pile of the feces. I hear it ringing, man.

[Brady]

Oh, crazy smells in here.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

These are the legal issues that we're dealing with. The highly advanced nation of Cameroon. So many people are drinking their urine that the government is threatening to prosecute anyone that promotes drinking. We. A best selling book in Cameroon claims that a glass of urine a day can cure hemorrhoids, ulcers, infertility, snake bites and baldness. One man claims baldness? Yeah. One man claims he didn't have hair on his head for years, but ever since he started drinking his own urine, he's working now with a huge 70s ABA afro.

[Doug Hopkins]

Is that right?

[Brady]

Huh. Well, I'm gonna have a little glass of this. Do my world be free here. Hello. Well, that I almost would consider. Then I didn't know it cured baldness.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

And finally I'm growing her back.

[Brady]

I'll get me a cup of this. Give me a glass. Amanda, immediately.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Redneck news of the day. This may be news to you, cowboy, but Lee Greenwood's song Proud to be American is not the national anthem. You don't have to stand up for it when it's playing. Unfortunately, some drunken patriots at a rodeo in Houston don't know that 16 year old Felix Finessel and his friends stayed seated during the song, and the redneck behind them started cussing at them for it. He spat at him, spilled his beer on Felix and his friends, and then punched Felix in the face. Felix says the worst part was when the idiot told him to go back to Iraq. You see, Felix is brown skin. He's half Hispanic, half Italian. He's born in Houston. Felix Laurier says, quote, this is phony patriotism. The next time he'll think, we need to stand from Okie, from Muskogee.

[Doug Hopkins]

Brownie, get up, stupid. It's our national anthem. Lee Greenwood done sung this thing. You ever watch wrestling? They play it and Kurt Angle rolls out. You guys go back to Rocky.

[Brady]

Yeah, I love the hillbillies. See, there's a reason why patriotism is dangerous in this country. Because there's too many people who just don't know why they're patriotic and what to be patriotic about. You're only patriotic when the bombs start falling tomorrow.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

Yes, you can taste it.

[Brady]

It's in the air, can't you? It's right there in the air. Then you stand up for Lee Greenwood and you stand up for anybody who just says america. You stand up when you watch American Idol. Doesn't matter.

[John Holmberg]

You can taste it.

[Brady]

We're 24 hours away from cheap gas.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

That's when there's a run on bald eagles at the pet store.

[John Holmberg]

People want them as pets.

[Caller or Guest]

I want me a bald eagle, man.

[Doug Hopkins]

We're killing brown people.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's it. Tomorrow the gas prices go down and I can't wait to watch. You know what? I want to turn on my TV tomorrow and see.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

My children.

[Brady]

CNN will rule for the next week.

[Co-host or Secondary Host]

You want to see Wolf Blitzer covered in muck?

[Brady]

Just blood.

[Doug Hopkins]

Wolf Blitzer live.

[Caller or Guest]

I've been hit by the brains of another Iraqi. Ah, for crying a lot. It's getting dirty down here. Live from bed, there's more. We'll be back. CNN's live coverage of the children.

[Doug Hopkins]

Please hurt my children.

[Brady]

Another burning Iraqi. Well, we'll be back after this. It's out of control now.

[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmberg here. Time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of my home group and doughotkins.com. i got an email from someone who told me that he wants to sell his house because he has to move for work. Got a new job, and it starts in February, so he needs to vacate quickly. And in this particular case, this guy can leave Arizona with cash from his home and be free and clear to start anew in his next location. Location that is peace of mind. No matter what the situation. Doug makes selling your house so easy it's hard to imagine going anywhere else. And he backs it up with a $5,000 guarantee. Start the process at Doug hopkins.com or.

[Doug Hopkins]

Grab that phone and sing Hopkins 1-800-sale now.

[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmberg here from the morning Cygnus and I'm absolutely thrilled to tell you about my [e-mail] youm've heard me mention Kevin Costner, Trey McBride, other countless celebrities and pro athletes and how they chose lifted trucks. But that doesn't mean it's only for actors and pro athletes.

[Brady]

It's for all of you.

[John Holmberg]

Everybody who loves a cool adventure. So if you're a hu celebrity like me or just an average Joe who wants the best truck available, head on over to Lifted Trucks. They live up to being the number one custom truck dealer for over 30 years. 10,000 five star reviews can't be wrong. Lifted trucks.com work hard, play hard, drive harder.