02-24-26 - BR - TUE - Olympian Coins Term Jeffing For Running And Walking In Same Workout - Woman's Garden Ruined By Robot Food Delivery - Man Busted Having Sex w/Roadkill

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 02-24-26 - BR - TUE
Date: February 24, 2026
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, Dick Toledo
Main Theme:
The crew delivers their trademark blend of irreverence, banter, odd news, and rapid-fire commentary on the eccentricities in daily life, bringing listeners up to speed on strange headlines, trends, and viral moments—fueled by wry humor and brutal honesty.

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Episode Overview

This episode mixes humor, disbelief, and a bit of disgust as the crew tackles stories ranging from bizarre acts in Kentucky to the latest in running “techniques” and questionable food delivery robots. Alongside recapping offbeat news, they riff on modern culture trends—including “jeffing,” the newest fashion in butt cleavage, and the perils of viral social moments caught on camera.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Fun Facts & Icebreakers

• The episode kicks off with Brady’s quirky world facts:
  • The world's largest iceberg (A23A) is now "slightly larger than New York City" after originally being as big as Rhode Island when it broke off from Antarctica in 1986. [02:20]
  • "Three times more people speak English as a second language than as a native one" ([03:49])—a jumping off point for John to lampoon U.S. attitudes about language.
  • Trivia on the first on-screen same-sex kiss: 1927’s Wings for men, and 1922’s Manslaughter for women. [04:30]

2. “Jeffing”: The Lazy New Running Craze

• Jeffing Defined: A running method coined by Olympian Jeff Galloway, involving alternating spells of running and walking in one workout.

  • Brady: "It's when you run for a while, then you walk for a while." [05:04]
  • John’s immediate reaction: "It's called lazy." [05:10]

• The group mercilessly mocks the concept:

  • John (sarcastic): "It's been around since the first time anybody ran. Because eventually you stop running." [05:25]
  • John: "You're not jeffing. You're either running or you're not running." [06:22]

• The riff continues with making up other “branded” forms of quitting:

  • Reference to “braiding”—"you do pushups, then you stop and then you do another push up years later." [09:57]
  • John: "It's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. It's giving a name to failure and then making you feel like it isn't. It's what moms do to kids to tell them you're fine. Here's a ribbon." [11:41]

  Memorable Quote:

  • John: "Jeff's advice was you're too fat to finish five miles. We're going to give it a name so you don't feel terrible about yourself when you quit." [10:59]

• Discussion detours hilariously into “fartlek,” a real Swedish interval training (mispronounced as ‘fart licking’), adding more fuel to the bit. [11:19–12:16]

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3. Odd News Roundup

A. Food Delivery Robot Ruins Woman's Garden

• Lady in LA claims a "coco food delivery robot” ran wild, smashed her garden, and she was unable to stop it.
  • John: "She couldn't stop it. It got around her. What a blob. This lady doesn't need to be ordering food." [08:58]
  • "She needs to jeff her way over to the Weight Watchers." [09:08]

B. Crime—AI Assisted Murders in Korea

• Young woman in South Korea accused of double murder, allegedly planning her crimes using ChatGPT and researching methods to mix drugs and alcohol. [09:24]

C. Kentucky Man Arrested for Having Sex with Roadkill

• 32-year-old Allen Osborne was caught in the act with a dead deer, pants down, covered in fur.
  • John: "They caught him with that deer. That wasn't the first time. You don't get caught banging roadkill your first time." [17:04]
  • John runs with it, concocting a wild backstory about Osborne’s “career” of roadkill encounters—"That dude's been at this for a while." [18:35]
  • Brady: "He always says he was out tagging deer." [17:51]
  • John: "He probably had the job, the unofficial job in his city. They'd call him and say, hey, we got one on the side of the road..." [17:30]

D. Trend Watch: Butt Cleavage Becomes “Fashion”

• Brady: "Vogue is calling 2026 the year of the crack—the butt crack. The fashion that the ladies are wearing and men, well, they're low cut jeans and they show a little bit of crack cleavage..." [15:13]
  • The crew riffs on the return of "whale tails," tramp stamps, and underwear (or the lack thereof).

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4. Viral and Visceral Videos

• MMA fighter celebrates after a match, attempts a backflip off the fence—lands and clearly injures his ankle.
  • John: "Oh, he did a backflip and broke both ankles. Or just the one?" [19:16]
• Other clips include:
  • Lane-splitting maniac in a microcar (playing real-life Pole Position) [22:02–23:21]
  • A cow's tail/feces sandwich eaten on camera in what the group suspects is India [23:41]
  • Soccer penalty kick interrupted by someone mooning behind the net [24:16]
  • Exploding public toilet prank involving an air compressor [25:22]
  • Various “fart” sound-effect videos, and a Spiderman cosplay with disturbingly “gross” noises [26:18–26:44]

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5. Notable Quotes and Comedy Moments

• John, reflecting on “jeffing”: "It's called jeffing so I don't feel terrible about myself for not accomplishing anything." [13:08]
• On the roadkill incident:
  • John: "You get a hair in your mouth during oral sex, everything stops. This dude's been at this for a while." [18:35]
• On naming lazy habits: "Everybody's jeffing. Everybody's dancing." [27:22]
• Running joke about giving up on tasks, coining “johnning”—"I got most of the job done boss. Then I quit and I did a lot less. And then I started to work hard again." [14:27]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Time | Segment/Topic | |-----------|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:20 | Fun facts: icebergs, English as second language, on-screen same-sex kiss | | 05:04 | Introduction to “jeffing”—run/walk workout trend | | 06:50 | Discussion/dismissal of “jeffing” as a concept | | 08:16 | LA woman’s garden ruined by food delivery robot | | 09:24 | AI-planned murder in South Korea | | 15:13 | "Year of the crack" fashion trend | | 15:47 | Kentucky man charged for sex with roadkill | | 18:35 | Theorizing about the roadkill offender’s backstory | | 19:02–19:21 | MMA fighter’s celebratory injury video | | 22:02–23:21 | Microcar lane-splitting video, Euro driving antics | | 23:41 | Culinary horror—eating cow feces with bread segment | | 24:16 | Soccer mooning incident | | 25:22 | Air compressor + public toilet prank | | 26:18–26:44 | Sound effects/fart noises/Spiderman cosplay video segment |

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Tone & Style

The hosts maintain a rapid-fire, sarcastic, and often irreverent tone. They delight in finding the absurdity and humor in dark or ridiculous news, never sparing their targets from mockery—whether it's lazy joggers, viral video stars, or criminal oddballs. Their interplay is lively, with a constant volley of jokes and unsparing opinions.

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Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness is a quintessential sample of the show’s DNA: weird news, unfiltered banter, and a mockery of anything deemed overhyped, undercooked, or just plain dumb. If you missed the episode, this summary captures all the laughs, shocks, and peculiarities—sans the ads and station promos.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

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[Comedy Announcer]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Downtown and stand up live. Get out and see the comedy of Moshe Casher and the up and coming Ari Maddie. Up north at Desert Ridge, you'll get Josh Wolf and SNL's Tommy Brennan and East side of the Tempe Improv. Don't miss the very funny Sam J. And more Josh Wolf for the complete lineups and for tickets, standuplive.com desert ridge, improv.com and tempeimprov.com you thought that was funny?

[John Holmberg]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[Brady]

What the hell is wrong with you?

[John Holmberg]

It's time for Brady to give you all the rest of the things that are going on in this crazy, mixed up world, especially you folks trapped down in Mexico. Why go? Don't know. It's brought to you by allprochade.com It'll be like 95 degrees by the end of the week. This is insane. You're going to need some shade. All pro shade's going to get you there. And if you know what everybody keeps saying, what are we getting? What are we in for in summertime? I don't know, maybe more hot. Get used to it. It's going to be a thing. But shade helps. And they can drop the temperatures like 20 degrees in February, you're looking to drop the temp about 15, 20 degrees. That. That's early, but it would feel great to have that back patio right there. And as the sun sets and the temps cool, you're in heaven. So give them a call right now. All pro shade go to allprochade.com and they will take care of you with the best in the business. They've been at it for over 20 years for a reason. They're good. All pro, Brady reporter.

[Brady]

Good Tuesday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.

[John Holmberg]

Hi.

[Brady]

Happy National Trading Card Day and National Tortilla Chip Day.

[John Holmberg]

All right.

[Brady]

Sure. If you get some apps at places like Chipotle or whatever, you get some free chips today. Now, couple of basis fun facts. The world's largest iceberg, officially known as A23A, was larger than the state of Rhode island when it first broke off Antarctica in 1986. Now it's slightly larger than New York City.

[John Holmberg]

Wait, say it again.

[Brady]

Largest iceberg.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. It busted from Rhode Island.

[Brady]

No, it was the size of the state of Rhode island. And when it broke off from Antarctica in 1986.

[John Holmberg]

Now it's about Manhattan size.

[Brady]

New York City. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Brady]

So

[John Holmberg]

what's bigger? They're about the same.

[Brady]

I wouldn't know.

[John Holmberg]

I don't either. I know, man. Well, Manhattan and New York island, like,

[Brady]

six is New York City. Is that all five?

[John Holmberg]

Well, it wouldn't be. The New York City would be. Yeah, we'd count.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Long island and all that stuff. That's still the same size as Rhode Island. So it's the same.

[Brady]

I think it would be.

[John Holmberg]

Did they say Manhattan? Manhattan's only like six.

[Brady]

They said slightly larger than New York City, but NASA reported that it's melting and it's melting quick.

[John Holmberg]

All right. That's what ice does.

[Brady]

Three times more people speak English as a second language than as a native one. English has more than a billion people learning it as an additional language, and only 390 million people speak it natively.

[John Holmberg]

Because they need to deal with us. They need to deal with us. And I'm not going to deal in yippee yappy. I'm not going to go down there and do your clicks and clacks. You learn the language or you don't, you're getting tariffed.

[Brett Vesely]

Now they're just wrong.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. Brett's right. We speak the language and you guys do funny baby talk, and we're not doing that. I want deals. I want deals with people who take the time to learn to talk to the deal maker. Me.

[Brady]

The first time two men kissed in a movie.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Was a silent film in 1927 called Wings.

[John Holmberg]

Is it the Howard Hughes movie?

[Brady]

And the first erotic kiss between two members of the Same sex was two females in a Cecil B. DeMille movie.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady]

Manslaughter in 1922.

[John Holmberg]

Sweet. Good job. It's Cecil, by the way. Don't call me Cecil.

[Brady]

Yes, sir.

[Caleb]

Rube,

[Brady]

have you ever heard the term Jeffing?

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Brady]

It. In jogging, it's when you run for a while, then you walk for a while.

[John Holmberg]

It's called lazy.

[Brady]

Former Olympian Jeff Galloway uses it with runners to help build stamina. Evidently, the Washington Post just did a story on the running hat called jeffing around since 1973.

[John Holmberg]

It's been around since the first time anybody ran. Because eventually you stop running.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

As far as Gump.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I'm done running. And then he walked. That's not jeffing. That was being done running and being normal again.

[Brady]

I guess you're done running if you just. All you're doing is walking, but eventually you start to run again.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's all. So what's the time difference? Like, what if I don't run until tomorrow? All right. Then we're all jeffing. Because if I run right now, I'm gonna stop, I'm gonna walk back to something else, and then if I run up the stairs, I'm like, oh, I just jeffed my way around. I've been jeffing my whole life. Yeah.

[Caleb]

So if you don't restart running ever

[John Holmberg]

again, you're done jeffing. You're done running.

[Caleb]

You're right.

[John Holmberg]

You're constantly jeffing because you're between.

[Brady]

I think once you start the run, you're jogging, and then you go walking, then you're jeffing, Then the run is over.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Then you're just walking. There's two. There's two very distinct things.

[Brady]

Jeffing session.

[John Holmberg]

No, you're not jeffing. You're either running or you're not running

[Brady]

because you have to start back up running.

[John Holmberg]

You're always going to do that, though. You run, you stop running, you run again. You're running, you're walking, you're running.

[Caleb]

60 plus years you've been doing that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You're like, if I started to crawl in the middle of it, now we're jeffing. Like, that's the thing. It's like you run, then you crawl a mile, then you run again. That's an actual thing. But I'm always going to walk. No offense, Caleb, but I'm always going to walk.

[Brady]

Another poll asked people if they've ever cried at work. 39% said they've broken down in tears while on the job.

[John Holmberg]

They haven't asked a rock radio station that because it's 90% of these tough guys.

[Brady]

14% of us have cried multiple times.

[John Holmberg]

Any dude in a Kill switch engaged. Shirt at work has cried at work. It's happened. I'm telling you. That's a fact.

[Brady]

Lady in LA is upset because a cocoa food delivery robot went rogue, messed up her garden. It happened this past weekend. Says she could hear the commotion happening inside or from inside her house. She looked outside, and one of the wheels of the coco delivery robot got caught up in her fence and then just started going through a garden.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Tearing it up like a stomper.

[Caleb]

That's those little robots like you see around asu, Right?

[John Holmberg]

I'd like that, though.

[Brady]

I saw the. They got that doordash one running through Gilbert right now.

[Brett Vesely]

Sure.

[John Holmberg]

I just filmed that, though, as it tore up my garden. Like, yeah, they're gonna pay me for this. But this is.

[Brady]

She chased after it. She said it must look like a crazy person chasing after this.

[John Holmberg]

You give me back my garden.

[Brady]

She tried to block it. Didn't work.

[John Holmberg]

It got around her.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Timeout, son. She couldn't.

[Brady]

It wouldn't stop.

[John Holmberg]

How fat is she?

[Brady]

Well, the fact is, like, I don't know if she was strong enough to stop it from moving.

[John Holmberg]

You couldn't.

[Brett Vesely]

She wouldn't have a garden if that's the case.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly.

[Brady]

Either way, she gave up. But the company garden contacted her and said, we'll reimburse you for your garden.

[John Holmberg]

We'll buy you some new Reese's Cups you keep in a box. There's no possible way you couldn't walk over to that thing in Tempe and stop it.

[Brady]

I don't know how big the cocoa delivery is.

[John Holmberg]

Is it a truck? Yeah. But again, if it's going up to your.

[Caleb]

It's a box with wheels.

[John Holmberg]

If it's going up to your front door, it's not that big. Yeah. It's not like. It's not like a Hyundai. Got a Mazda full of food.

[Brady]

I think you just knock it over. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Kick it. She's too fat. And then she said she couldn't stop it. It got around her. What a blob. This lady doesn't need to be ordering food.

[Brady]

A couple of jukes. She needs to.

[John Holmberg]

You know what she needs to do? She needs to jeff her way over to the Weight Watchers, start jeffing and start eating their food. She needs to atkins up a little bit.

[Brett Vesely]

She can't do anything but Jeff.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's it. Yeah. She takes two steps. Well, I'm just jeffing like. That wasn't a run. That was like a. You lost your balance or something.

[Brady]

That's got a 21 year old woman in South Korea that is charged with double murder. She's been accused of using chat GPT to plan the murders. They found on her phone a history of searching, of mixing drugs with alcohol. How much do you need?

[John Holmberg]

You mean Moises?

[Brady]

And so one guy got whack, took her back to the hotel room and mixed his cocktail up.

[John Holmberg]

Man, she did it, did it twice.

[Brady]

Now they're thinking there might be more.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. By the way, Scott Haynes said that he invented something called braiding, which is you do push ups, then you stop and then you do another push up. Like years later, you're Brady, you're in between, you're braiding, you're in between your, your 12th and 13th push up and you're just going to take a couple years off.

[Caleb]

What number you on now?

[John Holmberg]

There can't be. This is such a stupid thing. You're always in between the activities and if your two options are walking or running.

[Brady]

So if you went out and said, I'm gonna run five miles and I'm gonna walk two miles, you, you ran a mile and you stopped and walked a little bit.

[John Holmberg]

That's just bad running.

[Brady]

You run it again. You said five miles is the goal and you Jeffed it.

[John Holmberg]

You didn't Jeff it. You just walked. You're being lazy and you're giving a name to laziness. You didn't finish the run. You quit in the middle because it got too hard and you started to walk because that's easier. And then you started to run a little.

[Brady]

Jeff's advice was don't.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no.

[Brady]

Just stop.

[John Holmberg]

Jeff's advice was you're too fat to finish five miles. We're going to give it a name so you don't feel terrible about yourself when you quit.

[Caleb]

And your point was if it was five miles and he ran three of them. He ran three.

[John Holmberg]

He ran three miles and he walked two. It's a good healthy day. But you're not, it's not some accomplishment that you invented this. Well, I Jeffed it. No, that, that, that.

[Brady]

Maybe you'd rather fart. Lick it then.

[John Holmberg]

What's that?

[Brady]

That's where you run. And then you, you sprint back to jogging.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

Sprint.

[John Holmberg]

That's actually exerting more.

[Brady]

Lick. Fart licking. Yep.

[Caleb]

I don't think that's right.

[Brady]

No, I can't. I think it is.

[John Holmberg]

Nah, there's one over here. It started confident and then it stopped. Are you pulling those off for me?

[Brett Vesely]

Because I can't.

[John Holmberg]

It says new term johnning. It's when you beat off religiously for 43 years, then lay face down for seven days and start over. That's it. We're Johnny. It's exactly right. It's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. It's giving a name to failure and then making you feel like it isn't. It's what moms do to kids to tell them you're fine. Here's a ribbon. I'm gonna go out and run five miles, but three of them I'm walking. Well, you're not. Well, then what's called Jeffing? No, it's called quitting. All right?

[Caleb]

It's called fart leaking. And it's from your people, the Swedes.

[John Holmberg]

Fart licking.

[Brady]

Fart licking.

[John Holmberg]

Fart leak. Of course.

[Caleb]

You know speed play. Flexible, informal style of interval training designed to improve speed and endurance by mixing high intensity bursts with lower intensity recovery periods. All with this within a single, continuous workout.

[John Holmberg]

Fart licking. Also, I got an email. Of course, Brady knows that. That's a funny one. I'm not gonna do it. But I'm gonna.

[Brady]

Oh, I did it.

[John Holmberg]

Really?

[Brady]

Yeah, I did.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, with the Mongolian barbecue. First time.

[Brett Vesely]

It was years ago between YCS and Viet Shack.

[John Holmberg]

Wait a minute. 50 off at both. I'll be right back. I'm gonna Fort Lick all the way from Viet Shack over to the Mongolian barbecue and get a pound of that. I'm gonna Fort Lick back over there. What a Jeff my way around. Jeff inside. The rest

[Brady]

is.

[John Holmberg]

It's the participation ribbon. It's embarrassing to call it Jeffing. Yeah, I was running and I quit and then I started walking. They got a name for that. It's called Jeffing. So I don't feel terrible about myself for not accomplishing anything. Sickness.

[Caleb]

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[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmberg here from the Morning Sickness and it's time to talk about turf monsters. Az.com I have turf in my backyard and the only regret I've got is that I did not do this sooner. I have turned my backyard into a playground. I got a putting green, I got a pitching green, I got a sport court and I got loads of tur have to worry about dying or looking bad or watering. You can do it too. If you can dream up a beautiful backyard, the gang over there at Turf Monsters can make it a reality. All you have to do is check them out. Turfmonstersaz.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness I got most of the job done boss. Then I quit and I did a lot less. And then I started to work hard again. It's called johnning. We didn't finish. I did.

[Brett Vesely]

I finished.

[John Holmberg]

Johnny

[Brady]

Vogue is calling 2026 the year of the crack the butt crack. The fashion that the ladies are wearing and men, well they're low cut jeans and they show a little bit of

[John Holmberg]

a crack cleavage which means whale's tails are going to come back. Should be called twinking but that just basically means it's going to be target possibly the announcement that most girls don't wear underwear anymore.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean tramp stamps are going to come back.

[Brady]

Yeah, perp her for the day. 32 year old guy from Kentucky. He's facing charges for allegedly having sex with roadkill cops in the small town of Central City, Kentucky. Got a 911 call around 7pm on Saturday. Caller said they're driving near town when they passed a man having intercourse with a dead deer on the side of the road.

[John Holmberg]

His kill or you found it? He hit it and effed it?

[Brady]

Not sure. Cops showed up, found 32 year old Allen Osborne walking in the same general area. According to the police report his pants were still down around his knees and he was covered in deer fur.

[Brett Vesely]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

What? He was rolling around with it too.

[Brady]

They also found fur around his private area. Well yeah, that'll happen while he's being

[John Holmberg]

booked while he was jeffing that deer.

[Brett Vesely]

Nathan Sutherland understands.

[Brady]

Felony charge. Yeah. 32 year old Alan Osborne, White bearded

[John Holmberg]

Vermont face from Kentucky. Yeah, he's. He's. He looks like he's got syrup in one pocket and crack in the other. Let's take a look. Oh, my God. I'm dead on it. Oh, yeah.

[Byron]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

I was gonna say ball dynasty. Yeah, very duck dynasty. And you know what's crazy about that? They caught him with that deer. That wasn't the first time. You don't get caught banging roadkill your first time. Oh, yeah, he got cavalier about it. Didn't even try to push it to the side of the street. Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah. That's multiple times a week.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he's out there looking for him in the middle of the night.

[Brady]

Roadkill there.

[John Holmberg]

He probably had the job, the unofficial job in his city. They'd call him and say, hey, we got one on the side of the road there, Bob. All right, I'll go get it. And two in the morning, he'd take his pickup truck and go out there. And the first time he put it in the back of the truck, he looked and saw that sweet deer honeyhole and thought to himself, man, tight years.

[Brady]

He always says he was out tagging deer.

[John Holmberg]

I don't think that one's ever been before. And he put a finger in it. That's awesome. Then he put two fingers in it. Who drove it off, Burned it up, probably ate it, sold the meat. Couple hours later. Hey, we got another one out there on the. On the highway there, Bob. All right, another one. Honeyhole. Right. Eye to eye. Probably stuck his wiener in that one in the back of the Ford. Then it just got to the point where he'd bang it so much, he didn't even pick it up anymore. It was hitting him on the side of the street covered in fur. Come on. You get a hair in your mouth. You get a hair in your mouth during oral sex, everything stops. This dude's been at this for a while.

[Brady]

Yeah, you're right.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Gross. I just have one radio video. This guy celebrating after his MMA fight.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

Doing a flip off the fence.

[John Holmberg]

He's gonna flip off the top of the fence back into the ring.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

What do we got there? All right, buttons. Where's the play button? In the middle.

[Brett Vesely]

Jesus.

[John Holmberg]

All right, there you go. He does backwards. Those legs are gonna break. Oh, he landed it and his ankles gave way. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That's horrible. Oh, he did a backflip and broke both ankles. Or just the one?

[Brady]

Just the one.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. That is awful. All right, don't show me that twice. No, I only have one eye. Oh, it's over. Like your euphoria went to crap immediately. Oh, my God. All right, Bert, what do you got?

[Brett Vesely]

I'm still going.

[John Holmberg]

Have you guys been showing Larry any of these?

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, Larry's yesterday was mild, too, and

[Brady]

he's mild and he's scarred.

[John Holmberg]

Well, he ran away.

[Brett Vesely]

Even Brady called him a puss.

[John Holmberg]

He said, come on. What?

[Caleb]

And that's where we are.

[John Holmberg]

Larry, you didn't like the videos I had such a hard time with.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, it was. And then. And then we got to the porn,

[Brady]

and I was like, you guys get away with this? Really?

[John Holmberg]

Get away with what? Describing it.

[Brett Vesely]

The. The moaning and the.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's just sounds. It's silly sounds, Larry. I make them all the time.

[Brett Vesely]

See if I can find the one from yesterday that I showed little noises like that.

[John Holmberg]

What? That's coming from.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's yesterday.

[John Holmberg]

Here's the one that sent Larry. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

All right. The thing was, I was afraid that there was going to be some.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, oh, yeah. We're always afraid of that. I'm on that.

[Brady]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

There's a big, gigantic toy in a woman's sound.

[Brett Vesely]

It is. It does have sound.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Geez Louise. That is a big toy, Larry.

[Brett Vesely]

This is great stuff.

[John Holmberg]

This is. Larry, you're a program director of a major radio station. This is good audio.

[Brett Vesely]

And guess what I heard the second trip locked in the door.

[John Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

You're supposed to protect the license.

[John Holmberg]

Well, then don't talk about it the way you do. That was from earlier.

[Brett Vesely]

That wasn't from the videos. That was from your comedy show.

[Caleb]

That was from your video.

[Brett Vesely]

That was you.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, was his. He did something, almost got everybody fired. Remember the marital advice had a little

[Brett Vesely]

something to do with this?

[John Holmberg]

No, he hears this every day. Was there cursing?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, there was a couple f bombs that dropped, but I covered him up. Covered him up.

[John Holmberg]

That's what he's talking about. Fart noises. You don't even know what that is. That poor girl's got. That's. That's just. What are you talking. That's good audio.

[Brett Vesely]

And I was waiting for her to

[John Holmberg]

say a little something, something.

[Brady]

Yeah, but you.

[John Holmberg]

You hit the button.

[Brady]

Just hit the button with the.

[John Holmberg]

Do this every day. Oh, that's nothing. These girls just got a gastrointestinal issue. This is medical, Larry. This is.

[Brady]

I mean, like, I don't think.

[John Holmberg]

Grow up. Gross.

[Brady]

I don't think that is gross.

[Brett Vesely]

I do.

[John Holmberg]

You don't. No, I do. No, it's disgusting, but it's just a fun sound. She likes the bathes. Quit cursing on the air, Larry. We're professional. Show over.

[Brady]

What else you got, Brett? I can't top that one.

[John Holmberg]

Larry almost got us all fired with his cursed curses. Play the fart sounds, man.

[Brett Vesely]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

You know better than there's to Larry. Thanks for helping out, though. Larry was a gem. We're in a speeding car down the middle of the way. These lane splitting in a tiny one man vehicle. Oh, my God. This is horrifying. He's got a helmet cam. He's blazing down the road in this tiny little car. The camera's on his head. He's got a helmet on pedestrian. So he's got a helmet cam. And so it's from like the top of his head. It's a really weird angle. He's got driving gloves. Look at the speed by every car. Does he make it?

[Brady]

Come on, Brett.

[John Holmberg]

Look at me. Whoa. I mean, he's. He's lane splitting in a car.

[Brady]

I mean, he's got to be number one.

[John Holmberg]

This is pole position. This is the game. Pole position. If he hits an oil SL like, we're doomed. Look at right by a bicyclist. Oh, this is. This is harrowing. Another bicyclist. Was he in Copenhagen?

[Brady]

Come on. He's getting an extended play here for sure.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, for sure. Yeah. Eventually he's going to get a free L. There's a buddy doing it too.

[Brady]

Outrun. Outrun.

[Caleb]

He just got passed.

[John Holmberg]

This isn't real. Is this real?

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know. I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

I've never seen anything like it. That's pole position life. Holy cow. Oh.

[Brady]

Whoa.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

And there it goes.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's real.

[John Holmberg]

That was inevitable. Yeah. Inevitably that was going to occur.

[Brett Vesely]

We already seen that.

[John Holmberg]

By the way, that guy that got caught banging that deer, he was bambiing Brady. He was between. He was between a skunk and a deer. It was gonna. It was definitely gonna. Both of them.

[Brady]

Him.

[John Holmberg]

He's bambiing out there. Oh, hungry. Here's a dude squatted down and it's got like a bike tire on his neck and he's got a cow's tail that has just pooped. And he's reaching into the poop of the horse poop. And he's put it between two pieces of bread and he's eating with a bike tire around because he lives in the worst country in the world. I think that's India. It's somewhere around there. Come on. Yeah. They don't have clocks. Bike tires. Yeah, boy.

[Brett Vesely]

All right, here's some. There's some soccer for you.

[John Holmberg]

World Cup's coming. Oh, there's a person mooning from behind the net on tv, the penalty kick. And right behind the net is a woman's ass or is it a man?

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Don't know. But it's definitely a butthole right there on the live shot. I didn't have any of that during hockey because we're classier than those Euros. And here's a. Oh, we're backing out of a car and our doors open, and the guy had. A guy fell out of the car, or this is a mob hit. Everybody's dressed in black. Oh, no. The guy came back and hit him again. Oh, there's nobody in that car.

[Caleb]

Right.

[Brady]

How did it back up?

[John Holmberg]

It backed up, and then I don't

[Brett Vesely]

know if it hit something. Like maybe it was in neutral and hit something and then bounced back.

[John Holmberg]

Is that a Volkswagen? Because I think that's the new Herbie. It backed up with no one in it.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, he was in it, and then it came back and he fell out or something.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but how does it come back and hit him straight?

[Brett Vesely]

Been a neutral. And then it bounced off another car and came back. That's what I'm guessing. I'm not sure.

[John Holmberg]

Man, that's some serious neutral. Then it drove him into a wall. I think that car hates pristine. Yikes.

[Brett Vesely]

All right, now, I don't know what this idiot's doing.

[John Holmberg]

And then this guy is trying to bust into what looks to be an elevator or something. Oh, no. It's a public toilet.

[Brett Vesely]

And that's one of those things you blow up a tire with.

[John Holmberg]

And he's got a g. Gigantic thing to quick inflate a tire. It's a big air compressor.

[Brett Vesely]

He's giggling like, this is going to

[John Holmberg]

be a good idea.

[Brady]

Take a bath.

[John Holmberg]

He's putting a. He's putting it over the top of a toilet. He's putting the thing inside of it. He's. He's doing nothing of the sort, but he's not helping society. This is a joke. And he's now going to pull the thing to get the air into the toilet. And it just exploded on him. There he is walking out a brown cloud. They're laughing. He's not a real plumber.

[Brett Vesely]

There's one I was trying to find.

[John Holmberg]

Good Lord.

[Brett Vesely]

Which would have had good sound effects, too, but I don't know If I can find it again.

[John Holmberg]

Larry had to run from that.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, he was. He was freaking out yesterday.

[John Holmberg]

That's hilarious.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, here we go. There. You want some sound effects?

[John Holmberg]

Okay, gotcha. There's a girl's face. She's dressed up in Spiderman waiting for the queen. So, no, geez, that. You can't do that one. She's talking dirty like this. And she's in a spider man costume. And then she's gonna walk by and then. Oh, gross.

[Brett Vesely]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

The noise she's making in a spider man costume is gross. It's not a fart. It's gross. All right, so there we go. When women do it, it's gross.

[Brett Vesely]

So I knew I would. I knew these weren't going to compete with what Larry saw yesterday. And even Brady was like, nah, it's nothing.

[John Holmberg]

This guy says, john, you've been off the show too long. I'm now in Brady mode. The deer guy. Not a taxidermist, but he sure can mount a deer. Sorry. Sorry, Brady. I knew you'd love that. Yeah, I'm out there mounting a deer. I'm gonna go jeffing. I'm gonna take about six steps running and then walk to the kitchen. Everybody's jeffing.

[Brady]

Everyone's doing it.

[John Holmberg]

Everybody's dancing. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady Report. It's 98 Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station. Hey, it's John and Brett from the morning sickness and the nightmare of the holidays are behind us. And now it's time to treat yourself. The perfect time to fresh start everything with a new system. Quality car stereo, Upgrade your ride with better sound, smarter tech and service you

[Brett Vesely]

can trust, whether it's carplay, Android audio backup camera, camera security systems, window tint, or premium audio for your cars, boats, motorcycles or UTVs. This year, drive smarter and safer with quality car stereo. Quality car stereo in Mesa at the corner of Sauceman and Baseline. Make sure you check them out [e-mail]

[Blue Wave Pools Announcer]

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