02-26-26 - FULL SHOW - THURSDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – February 26, 2026 Holmberg’s Morning Sickness 98 KUPD | FULL SHOW SUMMARY

Main Theme/Overview: This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness delivers its signature blend of Arizona-centric radio banter—combining irreverent humor, audience interaction, lively complaints from listeners, and uniquely local contests. Host John Holmberg, alongside co-hosts Brady Bogan, Bret Vesely, and Nick “Toledo,” wades through topics ranging from listener drama, parenting in the digital age, infamous local bus trips, to the Metallica “Disappear to the Sphere” contest giveaway, interviews with NHRA racing personalities, and a candid segment with comedian/author Josh Blue. The episode’s unfiltered discussions evoke laughter, controversy, and Arizona community vibes.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Metallica “Disappear to the Sphere” Super-Contest

• [02:56 – 06:58]
  • John announces a unique KUPD contest: tickets and hotel for two of Metallica’s first Sphere shows in Vegas (each with different setlists), plus $200 gas money.
  • “You get tickets to both of the first two shows… Each show is different. Like a Tarantino thing, Kill Bill 1 and 2.” – John [05:43]
  • Holmberg highlights Larry’s behind-the-scenes work to secure this exclusive; compares the prize favorably against other stations.
  • Listeners can participate hourly between 6–10am by entering “code words” on the app or website.
  • Draws a distinction between live participation and podcast listening, poking fun at “dead” radio tactics and the influence of radio execs.

2. Listener Drama: The “Rachel” Emails, Fat Shaming, and Show Philosophy

• [15:12 – 31:10]
  • Holmberg trolls a complaint email from “Rachel” about previous jokes regarding restless leg syndrome (and her weight/personality).
  • Multiple sarcastic and mean-spirited emails about Rachel flood the show; Catherine, another disgruntled listener, writes in to defend Rachel.
    • “Fat Rachel and her sloppy legs…” – John [17:16]
  • Show launches into brutal comedic riffs about listener complaints, the “herd mentality” of emailers, and the futility of appeasement.
  • “If I’m not interested in the thing you’re interested in, it doesn’t make us mad at you. It’s just weird to us.” – John [52:19]
  • The team discusses the history of “Karens/Lindas” and the evolution of audience outrage.

3. Social Commentary: Speed Cameras, Traffic Laws, and Real ID Rants

• [11:06 – 15:12]
  • Riff on Phoenix/Arizona’s traffic cameras coming back, allegedly for “safety,” which Holmberg blasts as a cash grab.
  • “They put up speed limits by age… elementary was 15, high school 35, college 80—take those whores out!” – John [12:34]
  • John rails against the bureaucracy of IDs, school zones, and “old radio” cynicism.

4. Parenting & Digital Dangers: The Bone Smashing Challenge, Social Media, & Adult Blind Spots

• [78:48 – 91:12]
  • Segment highlights a disturbing social media trend: “bone smashing,” where teens hit themselves in the face for beautification.
  • Holmberg lectures Brady on the perils of assuming “my kid would never…” regarding viral stupidity and device use.
    • “That is what every dumb parent says… every parent thinks their kid won’t do the bone smashing thing.” – John [81:55]
  • Emphasizes SnapChat, Discord, and other apps as zones of parental blindness.
    • “Snapchat is the least of your worries. Discord is the problem. My daughter got the FBI at our house.” – Listener [95:15]
  • The hosts swap tales of finding explicit photos and drugs on their kids’ devices, breaking the illusion of innocence.

5. Philosophy & Perception: Are Our Realities the Same?

• [58:36 – 68:12]
  • Mind-bending talk about how the eye/brain flips images upside down—sparking a deeper query into the subjectivity of color, taste, and sensory experience.
  • “I don’t know if your eyes flip it over, and neither do you. You just assume your normal is just normal to you.” – John [65:01]

6. Emotional Support Animals & Societal Permission

• [68:12 – 76:08]
  • Story about a man with an “emotional support chicken” leads to a satirical deconstruction of therapy animals, societal patience, and the need for honest friends.
    • “If you’re down to a chicken as your only friend, do a little self-evaluation.” – John [71:13]
  • Brady’s story from childhood about a “show and tell” black lady is referenced with tongue-in-cheek irreverence.
  • Discussion points out how “chicken therapy” in nursing homes is more about job/purpose than animal empathy.

7. Special Guests: Comic Josh Blue & NHRA Driver Maddie Gordon + Ron Capps

• Josh Blue Interview – [138:29 – 164:44]
  • Blue promotes his autobiography Something to Stare At (“with big font and pictures!”), sharing personal stories both heartbreaking and hilarious—from trickster siblings convincing him he needed a tampon to volunteering as a zoo display in Senegal.
  • “People called me The Boo Boo Monkey! I was only wearing shorts… if you take the palsy out of context, they didn’t know what the hell.” – Josh [157:02]
  • Dialogues about family, raising kids, growing up as the youngest/sibling admiration, and being pranked for not having a period.
  • Describes idea for a “Palsy on Ice” entertainment event and the perils of being the family’s ‘experiment’.
• Maddie Gordon & Ron Capps Interview – [174:29 – 202:44]
  • Maddie, 21, daughter/granddaughter of racers, joins Capps Racing as a “top fuel” dragster lead.
  • “I went to my first race at eight days old… I rolled over at Chicago.” – Maddie [176:01]
  • Capps lauds her mechanical/welding skills. Mocks ensue about Maddie’s surprising Kentucky accent for a Central California native.
  • Discussion includes gram-level technical talk, local drama, and Maddie’s dreams of winning big.

8. Hair, Gender, and Modern Streaming – Bridgerton, Heated Rivalry, & Changing Fantasies

• [39:39 – 52:19], [113:14 – 116:07]
  • John & team riff on the popularity of shows like “Heated Rivalry” (gay hockey drama), the shifting nature of what turns people on, Bridgerton’s historic inaccuracies, and body-hair stereotypes.
    • “Chicks liking gay guys kissing, I didn’t think that was going to happen—so much hair, so much poop.” – John [46:30]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• “It’s the beluga pod. Andrew was right.” – John, mocking the herd instincts of complaint emailers. [34:23]
• “The only regret I’ve got is not getting turf sooner—never have to worry about dying, looking bad, watering…” – John, on his synthetic lawn (plug). [01:27]
• “You can do it, too—but don’t try to bring a chicken on my plane, unless it’s in Bangladesh.” – John, on emotional support chickens. [69:15]
• “Every parent thinks their kid won’t do the bone smashing thing… check yourself.” – John [85:52]
• “Snapchat is the least of your worries. Discord is the one you gotta worry about—the FBI ended up at our house.” – Listener email [95:15]
• “I’ve never watched Fifty Shades of Grey… It’s not a good… same kind of vibe, attracts the same people. It’s old lady porn.” [52:10–52:19]
• “If anybody in this room should be saying yes to taking $10 million for one year left to live, it’s you!” – John to Brady [171:29]
• “She’s a pig emotionally—and with her personality, body, she didn’t develop one.” – John on “Rachel” [24:40]
• “No, I don’t. Your retina moves it, your brain says, that’s better for me… but you don’t know what my normal is.” – John, on color/reality [63:09]
• “I just want to say, I’m no longer taking that seriously. Especially if you have that [chicken] on a plane.” – John [68:15]
• “I don’t want to be that guy, but Celery is… you burn more calories chewing it. Chicken wings? Not so much.” – John [33:32]

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• Contest/Listener Interactions: [02:14 – 31:10]
• Speed Cameras & Traffic Rant: [11:06 – 15:12]
• Perception/Eye Philosophy: [58:36 – 68:12]
• Emotional Support Chickens: [68:12 – 76:08]
• Parenting/Teens/Phones: [78:48 – 97:14]
• Josh Blue Interview: [138:29 – 164:44]
• NHRA Racing Interviews: [174:29 – 202:44]
• Music/Pop Culture Banter: [39:39 – 52:19], [113:14 – 116:07]

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Sections / Guest Segments

Metallica Contest – "Disappear to the Sphere"

Hourly codewords, live vs. podcast listening dilemma, prize details

“Each show is a different set list... it’s two different shows, not running the same thing twice. Man, this is awesome.” — John [05:43]

Listener Drama & Fat-Shaming Rachel/Catherine

Audience outrage, satire on cancel culture, herd mentality, ownership of comedy

“I'm not laying off that. I'm holding it. Rachel’s still fat and gross.” — John [16:34]
“It’s the beluga pod. That guy was right. Andrew was right.” [34:23]

Teenage Trends & Digital Parenting

Bone smashing challenge, importance of monitoring apps beyond Snapchat, harsh realities of “not my kid” thinking

“Every parent of a drug addict, every parent of a murderer... ’my kid would never do something like this.’” — John [81:55]

Eye/Perception Philosophy

Do people see colors and reality the same way? Mental exercise on how the brain flips images

"Everything you see is actually upside down." — John [59:31]

Emotional Support Animal Satire

Support chicken story, “poultry therapy,” mocking new levels of self-delusion

“If you're down to a chicken as your only friend...do a little self-evaluation.” — John [71:13]

Special Guests

• Josh Blue:
  • Book: Something to Stare At
  • Palestine on Ice, growing up pranked by siblings, “Boo Boo Monkey” zoo story, and learning to laugh at himself.
  • “They called me Boo Boo Monkey!” [157:02]
• Maddie Gordon & Ron Capps:
  • Maddie: 21, world-class dragster rookie, multi-gen race family
  • Capps on mentoring/support, “She could beat you on the track?” “Yeah. She’s a badass.” [191:44]

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Overall Tone and Takeaways The episode is brash, unfiltered, and intentionally provocative—sometimes pushing boundaries with dark humor, sometimes offering poignant life and parenting advice disguised in sarcasm. It leaves listeners both laughing and uncomfortably self-reflective, faithful to its theme of “entertain, question, and disturb as many listeners as possible.”

For those who missed it, expect:

• One-of-a-kind listener engagement (and antagonism!)
• Satirical eviscerations of societal trends and local government
• Absurdist rants, heart-to-heart philosophy, and Arizona touchstones
• Bonus: Engaging, funny, and personal interviews with Josh Blue and NHRA’s rising stars

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Recommended Segments

• Metallica Contest Details: [02:56 – 06:58]
• Rachel/Catherine Complaint Riffs: [15:12 – 31:10]
• Parenting & Phones in 2026: [78:48 – 91:12]
• Josh Blue “Boo Boo Monkey” Story: [157:02 – 159:47]
• Maddie Gordon/Ron Capps NHRA Discussion: [174:29 – 183:36]
• Perception/Reality Rant: [58:36 – 68:12]

For more, catch the next show or subscribe to the podcast.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmerg here from the morning sickness and I've got a new friend I'm fired up to tell you about Modern Resolution Windows and Doors. And I'm genuinely excited to tell you that these guys are good, locally owned, licensed, bonded, insured, custom windows and doors made in America with a lifetime guarantee, free labor on six or more units. Mention Holmberg and you'll get an extra 500 bucks off modern Resolution Windows and Doors, my new find and your home's new upgrade, free in home consultations. All you got to do is call, text or book [e-mail] give them a call. 480-665-5732.

[Brett Vesely]

Hey, it's Brett Vesely, and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?

[Brady Bogan]

Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone

[John Holmberg]

who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into MMP Guns where

[Brady Bogan]

he'll get a fair offer and he

[John Holmberg]

can rest easy knowing it's not getting

[Brady Bogan]

into the wrong hands.

[Brett Vesely]

Okay, but what if he lives out of state?

[John Holmberg]

Easy.

[Brady Bogan]

Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it all online.

[John Holmberg]

It that simple.

[Brett Vesely]

There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms.

[John Holmberg]

All right, HMS Podcast time again. It'll let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Hit up the east side to check out Josh Blue performing at the Tempe Improv downtown at Stand Up Live. It's the comedy of Phil Hanley for you this week. And up north of Desert Ridge, you

[Brett Vesely]

got Zach Rushing and Michael Loftus leading

[John Holmberg]

you into the weekend where you can see friend of the show Brian Callan on Friday and Saturday. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness. And it's time to talk about turfmonstersaz.com I have turf in my backyard, and the only regret I've got is that I did not do this sooner. I have turned my backyard into a playground. I got a putting green, I got a pitching green. I got a Sport court. And I got loads of turf. I never have to worry about dying or looking bad or watering. You can do it, too. If you can dream up a beautiful backyard, the gang over there at Turf Monsters can make it a reality. All you have to do is check them out. Turfmonstersaz.com youm thought that was funny?

[Ron Capps]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[John Holmberg]

What the hell is wrong with you? P.D. good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to the Holmberg's Morning Sickness podcast. It is 5:45. My name's John. There's Brett, There's Brady. I skipped you. Did I skip you? Is there Brett and Brady and then Toledo. Sorry about that.

[Brett Vesely]

Interchangeable bees.

[John Holmberg]

I only got one eye. What are you gonna do when I really can't see everybody? Yeah, it's a glorious day. You guys are like, the response to this Metallica thing is ridiculous. Numbers are every. I'm like, it's crazy. Larry and I were looking yesterday. I'm like, my God. For people who didn't.

[Brady Bogan]

You've told us a couple too.

[John Holmberg]

It's huge. And for people who didn't know a contest was about to happen, for you guys to respond the way you did to our Metallica sphere contest is insane. That the podcast is succeed. I will tell you that old radio thing that died a long time ago thanks to radio executives, but today the podcast is. It's going. And at six o', clock, I'm going to give you another word you guys can do. And I actually do. I got a couple of emails from people who said, I took your advice and got that text thread going. And we got everything rolling with that. And I've got 15 people that I text the word to every hour. That has got to be wildly annoying to the people getting the text who don't listen to this because we go all the way to 9 o'.

[Brady Bogan]

Clock.

[John Holmberg]

I was listening to Jeff last night on the way back from dinner, and it was right around nine. And he's a gut. Got the next word coming up. Like, we do this till nine. Those poor. That's. Look. God damn it. Again. So it's pretty. It's pretty awesome. Now, the problem is that the podcast, you can listen to it anytime you want. You can't participate. So there is a benefit now to listening live during the, you know, the taping of the podcast here live that we do on FM radio that you remember that it used to be a thing got ruined. I will point that out over and over. That got ruined by radio executives across the Board not focusing on anything viable. I'll say it every day until someone says, you got to stop saying that. And then I'll say it more. But anyway, so it's awesome. You guys are really kicking a whole bunch of butt on that thing. So six o', clock, I'll give you another. I'll give you another word, and we'll start that whole process again. Some of you saying, what's John talking about? I was asleep yesterday. I didn't put. Well, we've got a hell of a thing we're handing out. It's probably in here somewhere. But we are giving you a chance to disappear to the sphere. That's what it's called. Metallica announced yesterday, along with, you know, nationally, internationally, that they are going to have a little residency, a small residency at Sphere in Las Vegas. And we here at KUPD, celebrating 25 years of the podcast, got in great with the guys who run Metallica's operation. And I'll never. I'll never not say as Aaron from Q Prime is the guy who called, said, hey, I want to give you guys something specific. It was awesome. Larry worked his. Worked magic with his relationship with this guy. We are. I don't think anybody else in the country got this the way we got it. They might have a little thing here and there where they're giving away. This is ours. And it's pretty awesome. So they're going to play the Sphere Metallica in October, and we're going to send you guys to not only a show, but the very first and second show. You get tickets to both of the first two shows. First and third, we're going to get you in a hotel, see two of eight shows. And here's the thing, Brady. Each show is different. Each one is a different set list. So you go to show one, and it's all one show in two nights. So it's almost like a Quentin Tarantino thing. They got like Kill Bill one and Kill Bill two, you got. It's two different shows. They're not running the same thing twice. So, man, this is awesome.

[Brett Vesely]

This is similar to what they did here. No repeats.

[John Holmberg]

No repeats. The second night is an extension of the first concert. You're not going to hear the same thing. A little disappointing if you only get one that you might not have been to the night they did. My. My personal, odd favorite of Metallica's, which is nobody's favorite, but mine. Said but true. I don't know why that one hits me so hard. I love that song and I think I Got the night they did it and I just loved it. And I'm like, man, if I'd have gone. I went to both. But like, it was pretty awesome. And they do it again. So Metallica disappear to the Sphere and at 6 o' clock we'll give you more. I'm excited about this and I don't even get to play. This is awesome. So from 6 until 10 o', clock, you'll have opportunities to do this in each hour. We'll give you. And you also get 200 in fuel. Gas. We'll get you in gas. We didn't want to put you on an airplane just in case some of you felons want. And then we had to deal with like no fly lists and all sorts of legalities. You all felons can drive. I don't know if you can cross state lines, but that's your cross to bear. We don't have to deal with any of that.

[Brady Bogan]

Maybe next time we can put a bus together.

[John Holmberg]

No brain bus. They do. They have those all the time.

[Nick Toledo]

The prison bus.

[Brady Bogan]

We should run one to Vegas.

[Brett Vesely]

We should say, who's going on that one?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, not me. Brady and I did the bus every once in a while in Brady's car. And then Brady, we rode with a couple. Well, we rode with a couple until we didn't. And then once we realized, I don't need to be on this bus. And then Brady took a lady home and she tried to accuse him of rape. Wow, you didn't know that one?

[Brett Vesely]

No.

[John Holmberg]

We went down to Tucson and this lady got drunk, real drunk. Brady's like, I'll get you home. Brady didn't want to be there, so he had followed drunk.

[Brady Bogan]

She forgot her med.

[John Holmberg]

She was also really drunk because we met earlier at the bar. We were at the vine and we had a little pre party and she was drunk there and then forgot her meds, which were the alcohol was making her go loopy in the car back with Brady because he was in and decided to drive her all the way home from Tucson. She looks at him and says, you're not gonna pull over in the desert and rape me, are you? Hadn't thought about it till now. So Brady tells that story, but the truth of the matter is, oh, look,

[Brady Bogan]

there's a DQ brazier right there.

[John Holmberg]

Brady raped a burger on the way back. Should have left her there. I drove back once with one of the promo guys that wouldn't stop listening to death metal at peak volume in the KUPD van. And then we took a listener who Was so drunk back that she started to throw up in the car. And for whatever reason, this dude would not roll the windows in the front up. And I'm in the back. It wasn't cold or anymore. It's just annoying to go all the way from Tucson to Phoenix with the windows down in this. And she threw up in the car. And as she threw up, it just vortexed in a volcano. It was a tornado of puke in the center over the. And I'm just watching this thing spin going, where's that gonna land? It's like a roulette wheel. Where is that gonna land? Then I just kind of ducked down and it hit the driver. I forget his name. Little Mexican kid. He was. He was actually really fun, but he liked his style of music way too much. It was terrible. And he just. And that KUPD van had such a

[Brett Vesely]

huge system, like Marcus's music type thing beyond.

[John Holmberg]

I don't even know where this guy found it. It was like hobos scratching cats. It was just horrible. And then this lady just started barfing. And I. That. I've never seen barf do that. And that was because the windows were down. We're going 90 miles an hour. And he didn't ever turn it down. He's like, whoa. Like, this is terrible. And vortex puke in the center. And I'm laying in the back. I'm like, I'm never getting on this bus or driving back with any of these knobs again.

[Brady Bogan]

I remember the one show on the bus, one of the listeners just couldn't. Went too deep, which. And took a little nappy. And we went to the show, and the bus driver's like, well, we'll just keep him in the luggage bay.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. We stuffed him in the bus.

[Brady Bogan]

He slept there the whole time.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Our former friend, the late Freddy, years ago, Freddie was with us, and he fell down. Well, I don't know why we took him, but he fell down. He was. It wasn't.

[Brady Bogan]

Don't forget that sound.

[John Holmberg]

Massive head trauma already Freddy had. And then the sound of Freddie hitting the ground. And every. He was so dirty, like pigpen dirty, that as he lay dying and we all looked at him going, that's not gonna. That his head hit real hard. And it was not good to start with that everyone just kind of let him lay there. Nobody. Nobody really doing. I'm not touching that. Even the MTs went by and went, nah, he can go. And we just let him go. It wasn't even a thing. So no Brady to the bus Idea. No, we've been through that enough, and it is a terrible, terrible idea. So we'll figure out other stuff, but prison bus, that's the. That's still gonna meet you there? Yeah, we'll meet you there. I'll JSX up because I don't have any. I don't have an F. Con Air because We've learned the F4. Yeah, I'm not. I don't have any of that. I ain't got a felony, so I don't have to deal with that. I don't have one of those real IDs, but I'm willing to pay the 40 bucks to get them off my ass again. The real ID is two things they keep saying to you that are lies. And here we go. Fat, fat, turning fat, getting red. And every time you hear the word, they're helping you. They're doing it for safety. They're lying. It's for money. Real IDs, for your safety. It's the same ID, nothing changed. They put a sticker on it like you're in kindergarten. That's it.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, you get your gold star.

[John Holmberg]

That's it. The traffic cameras that are now up again in Phoenix, they went back and forth. We'll let them vote on it in October. In the meantime, let's do it. Everything I'm being told and shown on the news is, well, it's for the safety of the people. We haven't had a whole, like, slew of speeding, like, deaths. And the one thing they said, it's like school zones. We have to put them in school zones because it's hard to go 15 miles an hour, right? Even like at 11:30 in the morning when there are no kids out, but they're still in the school zone. Everybody goes about 22. It's hard to slow down to 15 and realize, Jesus, 15 slow. And I do it because I respect the school zone. But they got like a real low tolerance for that. So they'll give you a ticket of three miles an hour over. So you're going 18, tell me what, 18 miles an hour if you're going to 18 on a bike. And they're like, it's for the kids safety. We have had, by the way, passing to zero people mashing into kids at school zones. There's like no statistics of it. So where's the safety coming in? If it happened, it was truly an accident. Like, you know, nobody just going beer, just blowing through there. There's is zero. What do we. What's the need for? Oh, it's also 85 bucks for every old person that gets a ticket. Oh, it's about safety. You're being lied to. Tell me right now it's about the gay frogs. It's nothing to do with safety. Brett, where are the men?

[Brady Bogan]

Where.

[John Holmberg]

Remember when you were a kid and they just put up speed limit signs based on your size? Elementary schools were 15. Junior highs were 25. High schools were 35. Because you could take a bunch of. As you got bigger, people were allowed to drive faster around you because you could take a hit. Your skeletal mass was better.

[Brady Bogan]

I remember when moved out here in the 90s and you go through that high school zone, they said 35.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Wow.

[Brady Bogan]

That's pretty lenient.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I said, Brady. 35. Your skeletal mass can take the punch. High school, they encourage you to go 30. For college, you can go 80. Take those whores out. What happened to the people? Good. I am. I'm turning into him. I'm watching the news last night. I don't know how many times I looked at it went, oh, bullsh. What's this bull?

[Brady Bogan]

It's for your safety.

[John Holmberg]

We have zero statistics. Like, consistent statistics have to be consistent. I'll get an email. Go. There was an accident. That's an outlier consistency. There's. There's none and there's one and then there's an average, and the average is nothing. Like, nobody's getting run over by these.

[Brady Bogan]

They'll get the research from the company that wants to put the equipment.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. And the other thing was that the. The cop they had on TV saying that these speed cameras have to be out. We get so many calls every day from people from neighborhoods saying we've just got speeders all over our neighborhood. I'm like, you know who those people are? Those old bitties have nothing to do that stare out their window. And they don't like any cars going by their house. There's another one blazing bar called. And you know who you talk to about that? Who hates it? The police. Dispatch. Police officers who hate that. Old ladies call. You call us every day about speeders. There's no problem. But now they're. They're turning that and using it. We need it. We get all these calls for speeding. No, you get a bunch of old ladies with their heads plastered to their window because their lives inside their house fell apart 35 years ago right after menopause. They just went bananas. And then 35 years of that staring out windows and telling everybody else they suck.

[Brett Vesely]

Mrs. Kramer, don't drive Anyway, so.

[John Holmberg]

Doesn't matter. She can't. She's mad that she can't speed. She can't. Nobody allows her to drive anymore called

[Brett Vesely]

dial, ride, and shut them.

[John Holmberg]

You got to wait for her daughter or son to show up once every couple weeks to see if she's still alive. Then they end up with a Nancy Guthrie situation. We haven't talked to mom.

[Brady Bogan]

And what they do. Sometimes you have it in your neighborhood. In some areas, they start complaining about, okay, we'll put the speed bumps in.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And then now you got a street with the speed bump out. And I drive a Jeep and a Bronco. It's. It's fun for me. I have. I hate the people that.

[Brady Bogan]

The lady that's complaining, all of a sudden now she doesn't have to drive.

[John Holmberg]

She never has to go over. And besides, a speed bump to a woman that complains about speeding in her neighborhood is a wall. They go five miles an hour anyway. The speed bump, their car's gonna back up. So all that safety talk and all that nonsense. Don't get me started. They skip school. So thank you anyway. And then, you know, you. Some of y' all just do the show for us. Rachel, yesterday, if you were listening, a lady named Rachel called up. And by the way. And Rachel. I started wondering because I kind of glossed over it. She was complaining about me saying something about restless leg syndrome being fake.

[Brady Bogan]

Did you.

[John Holmberg]

I didn't even ask what. What ran. Because it had to be on the best of. Did we do something where I mentioned restless leg syndrome?

[Nick Toledo]

Yeah, you went on a ranch.

[John Holmberg]

You played that

[Nick Toledo]

15 years ago.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

No, I've been. It's been fake the whole time.

[Brady Bogan]

So any given time, when we first heard it, probably.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. It's.

[Brady Bogan]

It.

[John Holmberg]

Look, it's never been a real thing.

[Nick Toledo]

Right. And that's been your stance the whole time.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. It's always been something where you're just a little. You're restless. That's not a disease.

[Brady Bogan]

It's just.

[John Holmberg]

You're not.

[Nick Toledo]

Your mind is going, sure. And you're.

[John Holmberg]

You know, we've all had other parts of your body. We're twitchy. So you did run some. Because I started thinking yesterday. I'm like, that's.

[Nick Toledo]

I've played that a couple times.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe this broad maybe heard it somewhere else and then blame me.

[Brady Bogan]

But.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, so fair enough. All right, back to. Rachel's still fat and gross. And there's no question I'm going to. I'm not laying off that. I just want to. Oh, you Got a good complainer? I got. I got it. I'm holding it right now. So I got. I got two of them. I got this one that says I happen to know the Rachel you were talking about. We worked together and she left work today because she was distraught success. Remember? I said I hope she like walked into traffic and stuff, but damage to the car would be astronomical.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll say.

[Brett Vesely]

In Orlando.

[John Holmberg]

I said she said she's considered considering suing you in the station. Good. I listened to it

[Nick Toledo]

every Rachel in town.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Good. Let me get my checkbook. Rachel. You'll see zero. It says I listened to it and you wisely never even said her last name, which is brilliant. It could be anybody. Any fat Rachel with restless legs is a target. She actually is not that awful to look at. But you were right. Her personality is garbage. She's alone for one reason. A deaf and blind man would grow sick of her crap in about one week. All she does is complain.

[Brady Bogan]

There's day number two. She's going home.

[John Holmberg]

So she was on. She said she was on you about yesterday or she was on one about you yesterday to a co worker. Deep down, I think she liked the attention. Signed Roger. Which is not my name, but I'm a co worker of fat Rachel and her sloppy legs and I don't want to get fired. So we get that one right.

[Nick Toledo]

If her type 5 starts with restless leg syndrome and doesn't get better, nobody

[John Holmberg]

wants to hear your problem.

[Brady Bogan]

Tight.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't think she's got tight any.

[John Holmberg]

Even her stories are sloppy. And fat. Even. Even her stories are like a prime rib you'd send back the middle of this might be good, but I gotta get around so much fat. Rachel's fat and disgusting. Hideous. I've never seen her.

[Nick Toledo]

But can she spin you into a tight five?

[John Holmberg]

I get a tight five on Rachel. Sure.

[Nick Toledo]

Well, I know you can, but if is in her story, can she spin it?

[Brady Bogan]

Her attention? Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

No, I'm not going to listen to the first minute. I got no time for that. She makes me sickness medicate. KUPD.

[Nick Toledo]

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[Brady Bogan]

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[Nick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

It's John Holberg here, shilling away for new acunit.com I've been telling you about the amazing new ac unit.com for about three years. New acunit.com put the power back in your hands. Three easy steps online gets you your unit ordered, inspected and installed by the best in the business. And I'm super excited to tell you that new aceunit.com now offers many splits. If you work in a garage, a casita, or even have like caves somewhere back in that garage, mini splits can be a must. New ac unit.com has it now and you can install it. They'll even include the electrical Save thousands, save time. Buy online new AC unit.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness and besides that, I gotta, you know, box for a long time. So I got good head movement, but I can't dodge all those ho ho squishins that are flying out of her mouth during a story.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll chew the fat with her.

[John Holmberg]

Of course you will. I got another one and people just do the do the show for us.

[Brett Vesely]

That's great.

[John Holmberg]

It says it's 4:34 and your DJs are disgusting and not funny. I failed to see how making fun of people's weight and joking about them having sex with overweight women is good in the most degrading way a person can talk about it. How is that funny? What does that have to do with music? It doesn't. Thank you Catherine.

[Brett Vesely]

It is funny.

[John Holmberg]

I thought it was hilarious. It was really funny.

[Nick Toledo]

You're listening at 4:34, Catherine. You chose to download the podcast and listen to it in your car or wherever.

[John Holmberg]

So you found us funny before. And by the way, the podcast doesn't play music. Right. So another one. You. You big fat. It.

[Josh Blue]

Shut up.

[John Holmberg]

I ain't got time for this no more. I have to go yourself. Why don't you and Rachel talk about this right before Farmer Johnson brings out the slope? You two can hog together. I don't see how that's funny. You just announced yourself as uncomfortable with your own money. I was making fun of Rachel individually and not having sex with her. How you got involved is your own business. I wasn't saying, oh, there's a lot of big ladies with great attitudes who are fun. One of them emailed us yesterday, said, I'm a big un and I got a fat ass. And she was proud of herself. She's got confidence. Rachel was mad at me for something I said years ago, and we reran. And then decided that she was going to attack me, so I attacked back. You know what? They hate someone who fights back. Because radio people are pussies all the time. They get a complaint letter, and then the next thing you know, they're being extorted by somebody and we're writing checks and handing money to say nothing happened. It happens. Oh, we got a complaint letter. The bad ones in radio bow down to that moment. I'm not doing that. You want to come after me, I'll come back. Rachel. Catherine. Yeah. And you're listening. They're all Karens. We had. We had our Linda's way before Karen's. We invented the Linda, which was the impetus and the origin of the band sodomizing Linda, as we called them Linda's way before everybody started calling them Karens. Because we had Linda's emailing us.

[Brett Vesely]

The power of the podcast.

[John Holmberg]

But why is she.

[Brady Bogan]

What is her like?

[John Holmberg]

She's listening in the afternoon to a musicless podcast. And I guarantee. Oh, it's Catherine is her friend. Rachel told her to listen.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

There's only one reason for her to think, I'll get him. I need to hear this. And then she heard. It was like, what does this have to do with music? Have you ever listened to the radio, you dumb. Since when is anybody just going, well, there's Smashing Pumpkin. Oh, Billy Corgan shaved his head for the first. We're not all talking about. He's got their own music. We'll get to that in a little bit.

[Brett Vesely]

I did post on our Instagram yesterday.

[John Holmberg]

There she is. Restless legs. What does that say?

[Brett Vesely]

Gained 50 pounds.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, because. Yeah, because she gained 50 pounds from restless leg syndrome and lost relationships. It had nothing to do with her personality or size. And here's what she should be doing with her food. And that is the six o' clock word. It's purge. Go ahead and get on the. Purge is the 6:00 clock word that you put in our website and you put in our app and you go to the app and you go to the website and it'll give you a six o' clock time. You put a word in and then we got that. So purge is the 6am word. How's about that? Get on it. Yeah. Thank you, Catherine. That's nice.

[Brett Vesely]

Did you say pie?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, no, no. Purge. It's what UCLA cheerleaders do after they eat a Catherine sized meal. You say curds. Yeah, I don't, I don't suffer turds lightly anymore. I'm not dealing with it. I have a problem with what you said. Well, I have a problem with what you're saying. How dare you. I'm like, well, we're the same. We're the exact same. I'm bitching at you, you're bitching at me. Let's call it a draw and walk away because I'm gonna have. I'm gonna win. You're gonna complain at Postino's and I'm gonna complain over a hundred thousand watts of FM airwaves and then also a huge podcast that more people listen to. So I'm gonna win.

[Brady Bogan]

You're gonna get attacked by Rachel's.

[John Holmberg]

Now I'm ready. I will outrun them. I got six. You know, each square of a sidewalk is what, about two and a half feet? I got 16 of those to cover before she bends over and touches her knees and starts going and takes an inhaler or something and tries to breathe again. Besides that, I think we're way too close to the zoo for Rachel to run wild in the streets because somebody's gonna go, one got out. Don't want to hear it, ain't got time for it. And I like that you, you tried to protect Rachel, but we weren't talking about all fat ladies and how we don't want to have sex with them. We were talking about that one particular pig named Rachel and how nobody wants to have sex with her. And that was in her email, not ours. She's not a pig physically, although she is. She's a pig emotionally and with her personality, body, she didn't develop one. And then she was probably pretty at one point, and then the restless legs caused her to eat too much. Marie Callenders. I don't know how that works.

[Brady Bogan]

You think it'd work the Other way.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I said yesterday. It's like the more she moves in bed, the better it is for her. She's gonna lose weight. It's kind of nature's way of saying, you're gonna die. And again, all the listeners that came in and said she'll have less restless legs soon when diabetes takes her feet. Still one of my favorites. Thank you. So keep them coming. I couldn't be happier that you guys have lost your money.

[Brett Vesely]

Catherine is Rachel's burner account that Tubby is trying to make it look like she has friends.

[John Holmberg]

I wonder. I want Catherine. Doesn't seem legitimate. Like, nothing adds up. Say, how can you do that? And you listen to. Well, it's all about music, isn't it? Well, you listen to the podcast. There's no music on it. So what are you doing? And why do you know about us if you hate everything about us? Just nothing funny. It was disgusting. And now I can picture you. You're a blob, too.

[Brady Bogan]

That'll be the next picture today. The two of them together.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, you'd be. Better be from the Hubble. Yeah. Take your big fat fingers and dip them in Crisco and get them off the keyboard. Nobody has time for you. That's enough. What does this have to do with music? Oh, now you're program director. You get to tell us what we do on the show. Just turn it off.

[Brett Vesely]

And of course, everybody's jumping in on pictures of her.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, of course, there's Rachel the Hutt and now Catherine the Hutt. I wonder how much Catherine is. I wonder how much Catherine is tied to Rachel. Cause this based on what that fake Roger said. She was complaining at work and had to leave, which I was thrilled about. I hoped yesterday that my rant against her caused massive mental damage, and she went home and considered sucking down a bunch of Tylenol. And if she did, I'd feel. Feel bad for a minute, but I'd be like, well, at least there's no more emails. And I don't think Tylenol makes enough pills because, you know, it has to do with mass body mass. And how much will they. How many bottles would shift? She'd be full before the stuff would kick in. To take her down, you need thousands of them first. I mean, imagine trying to tranquilize an elephant with Tylenol. It would take forever. And Rachel's probably a little bigger than Babar. Anyhow, the emails are rolling now.

[Brady Bogan]

Things will be better by next.

[John Holmberg]

So this is a very good. This is a Very good literary reference says Catherine was upset at 4:34 cuz Templeton woke her to show her the message that Charlotte had made. See, that's a Charlotte's Web. Wilbur the pig. And it's a pig reference.

[Brett Vesely]

Catherine is actually Rachel's personal door dash delivery person.

[John Holmberg]

Very upset that Rachel was possibly considering five door dashes instead of her normal eight.

[Brett Vesely]

Brady, isn't the wildlife zoo looking for

[John Holmberg]

a name for them? Yeah, yeah, Rachel.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh my God, we're too late.

[John Holmberg]

That kid doesn't know its name yet. That pygmy isn't. We could. I know people who change their kids names like a year later. Call Christy and say we have to name the baby Pygmy. Rachel. And her middle name is Catherine. Rachel Catherine. Pygmy. Please. Brady, I'll text her. Text her now. I don't see your fingers working. Act like Rachel and get those pudgy digits moving on the keyboard. Two days of this nonsense. I ain't got time for this. This one says, how is it you can sit there cursing like a sailor, finding Brett videos funny racial humor, but make fun of an angry orca? And then the whole pod emails in. Why is it being a hysterical hippo? Justifying going too far? It has to be an arrogance thing. It's not me, it's everyone else. And thinking about Golden Corral as fine dining. We'll get into that later. What I'm trying to say is trailer parkland. Belugas have almost no value, but believe they do, and only men say otherwise. Andrew, that's beautiful. You should write for Hallmarker. What did you steal that from? Keats or Shelley? Which prose writer were you following when you came up with that gem? Yeah. Beluga. Rachel Catherine. Beluga. The pygmy hippo at the. At the Wildlife World Zoo. Brady, if. If Christy is your friend at all, and I know she was on the Today show and got all that attention, but if they just went back and said we named it Rachel Catherine. Oh, sweet Rachel. It's almost. It almost sounds Catholic. Little Rachel Catherine.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Man, do I like that. And we're gonna do it for you, Chunks. We're gonna do it for you, Rachel.

[Brett Vesely]

You'll always be remembered.

[John Holmberg]

No one's ever gonna forget you. You know what? And finally, I looked up on that real quick.

[Brady Bogan]

Like chunks. What?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Here. Yeah, I know. It's all right. A little trigger there. Yeah. Here. Thing about the only time that men will look at Rachel and smile is when Rachel is the pygmy hippo. That's the only. They're not the real Rachel. They look at her and laugh. That's different. How would they make fun of this situation? I can't. Anyway, silly. Stop it. Be normal. Yeah, that lady went out of her way to get mad. She went and downloaded the podcast to go get mad. I don't understand that, John.

[Brett Vesely]

You know, when that fat pig went home, she started down on bottles of ranch.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, the ranch. Look, hidden farms. Probably center. Oh, we're sorry. Letter. God, you went through. You had a tough morning, Rachel. Here. Here's some freebies. I love it. Absolutely love it. So just leave us alone. Don't do it.

[Brady Bogan]

That.

[John Holmberg]

That's silly for you to. It's crazy for you guys to think that we're gonna care about this. Like, it's like you literally. It's like trying to talk to a sociopath about, like, his feelings. You're not gonna get through to me with your argument. I can disagree that restless leg syndrome is a silly made up thing for most people. I think it exists. I think it's been taken advantage of by people who want maladies so they can have some interesting thing about them. Them that usually it deflects from what's really their insecurity. And in Rachel's case, it's a massive obesity problem. So she didn't want people talking about that. So she leads with, I'm also very ill. And that way people like, oh, you got to give her a break. Well, I don't. You got restless leg syndrome, and you're fat. You got a B. You got two problems. One's better than one. I'll take the restless legs. I'm worried about you steamrolling me and yelling slurs.

[Brady Bogan]

You just say, Tourette's.

[John Holmberg]

Tourette's. Yeah. That's the big thing. And I would be all over that if I had used it many times. Busted by slurs. Brett's got some. He give. You have giggle Tourette's when someone does yell a slur. Because you can get in trouble for that, like, being adjacent. Like, imagine if you were sitting next to that dude at the baftas and you didn't even know him. And he started bombing Michael B. Jordan there from the crowd. And he'd be looking this mother right here. What are you doing? And then they show Brett in the audience dying.

[Brady Bogan]

Look at this guy with his phone up.

[John Holmberg]

He's doing a bunch of times. Oh, and what was he laughing at? Brett, the star of this movie, is laughing hysterically at this. But what they expected is just put your head down and shake it and go, wait, this is bad. But you and I would both be. The Tourette's guy's losing it. Oh, get your phones. It's. Yeah, it's a thing. So sorry, Catherine. And I'm sorry, Rachel, but not for what I said. I'm sorry that you were dealt such a poor metabolism. That's. It's such a bad thing that you

[Josh Blue]

have to live with.

[John Holmberg]

You really should keep an eye on it. Celery is. And you know, my eggs are great. I believe beets, which I can't stand. That's considered one of those perfect foods. You know, those, uh, that and I think, uh, celery is one that you actually burn more calories chewing it with your chicken wings. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. We gotta keep her weight. I was just trying to help.

[Brady Bogan]

It's a good balance.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but no, it's like superfoods. That's what the beets are, a superfood. You go look it up on the Internet, get your fat fingers away from the email and stop bothering me and go to Google and go, what are superfoods? And how can I make my life easier? And it'll tell you, like, you're gonna have to eat a lot of beets. And I know that's against.

[Brady Bogan]

You know, pizza is not a super.

[John Holmberg]

No, pizza is a super good food, but it's not a superfood. Especially in the hands of Rachel, which is just probably lost a finger or two.

[Brett Vesely]

John, why is it when one heifer complains, the whole herd has to join in?

[John Holmberg]

It's the beluga pod. That guy was right. Andrew was right.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, yeah, Herdman town.

[John Holmberg]

Well, it is herd mentality. It is the. It's you. One of them goes. And the rest of them start going. One week. They all start doing it too. You never have one dog howling. Usually a couple of them look and go, yeah, me too. Why not? Triggers. Yeah, it's just like one dog does that. If I do it right now, there's a chance. There's like huskies out there. They're like, well, all right, we're howling. And that's what pigs do, too. They don't howl. They smash keyboards with their big, fat, pudgy chicken fingered, stained nails. Now she's got. Now she's been hammering on that keyboard so much, she looked at her nails and probably went, I need a manicure. And then she drove to Earl Shive, and she got that taken care of.

[Brett Vesely]

She called the blacksmith out of sawing things down.

[John Holmberg]

Bend your foot behind you.

[Brady Bogan]

Come on.

[John Holmberg]

Careful, I'll kick.

[Brady Bogan]

You can't read any letters on the keys.

[John Holmberg]

No, they're all smashed away by the oil and grease and Cheetos. They just wiped them all off.

[Brett Vesely]

Ho ho. Chocolate all over them.

[John Holmberg]

She's got that plastic cover like grandma used to have on the couch over her keyboard. It keeps the Cheetle and the roasted chicken grease off. Then she eats the keyboard because it tastes so much like her food.

[Brett Vesely]

What's the code word for Metallica? Oh, I mean the Sphere Purge.

[John Holmberg]

It's the six o' clock purge. Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

One over there.

[John Holmberg]

Oh no, that's the other thing. We might be the only station in town that tells people, stop listening. Just leave. Go away. I know it's going to take forever because you know, you're a ham planet so it's going to be rough for you to turn around and walk away. But just leave. We don't. I don't care. Morning sickness. Can you pd? It's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness to tell you about the Core Institute. People who met me found out that I've had four major operations in the last four years. They're blown away. I've had both shoulders replaced and both hips replaced because I was an absolute disaster before my surgeries. I was in pain. Now no one knows I've had any issues. People who hear multiple surgeries assume they'll never be the same again. It's just not true. I'm better than I've been in 20 years. Stop quitting the things you love and get back to being the pain free you you love. Thecoreinstitute.com have you ever wanted to go

[Nick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

This one says, well, now Marcus has taken it too far. This fat bitch needs to fix her diet and go for A walk. Restless leg syndrome is from too much sugar, parasites and caffeine in your system. Maybe she should put a collar on and take herself for a walk with her fat cow ass. Signed, Marcus. Now what are you going to email Marcus, Catherine? Are you going to get mad at. He's participating. So I'm speaking for a large group of people and I'm sick of. I'm sick of hearing from nonsense people like you, and you can be sick of hearing from me. You have the option to not download the podcast and then ask me. Isn't this all about music? On a thing that doesn't play music don't make no sense. You don't make sense chunks. Your prime rib brain's got too much goop in it. Anyway, there. We've handled Rachel, I think, I mean, as best as a man can. Well, definitely gonna break your spine if you don't live because your legs. But had it. I want to talk about something. The. The numbers are in for the Olympics. And man, oh, man, was this Olympics a wild success. It was huge. Averaging 21 million viewers a night. Night. Which makes a. And that's humongous for network television, which doesn't do any business anymore at all when talking about people who have ruined something free and easy television executives on a local level, let alone the national level. So networks have to rely on live programming from here on out. Or they're hoping for news and controversy that makes you tune into that, the local news and stuff. But it's not going to happen too often. Huge numbers for them. So. So everybody over there at channel 12 just celebrating beyond belief that they got these numbers to pretend that they're going to continue to keep it. They're not. The big number that came back from the Winter Olympics was they tried this year to not have freebie condoms. You had to actually go get one out of like a box or something. And they put 10,000 to the Olympic Village. Yeah, the athletes, because they go through like 10,000. 10,000 was the number this year of the confirmed protected takes.

[Brady Bogan]

And I'd heard that, you know, like this first time they ran out this early.

[John Holmberg]

They ran out right off the bat, like it was immediate. So the sex was unreal at the Olympics. And they keep saying that young people don't interact or that's all they do. They. They slide into each other's dms and then they do it. There's like, we as a generation of people are like, you had to date one for a while. You don't anymore. You just have to talk to them on, like, their Instagrams or whatever it is. And then. And then they meet you somewhere and you have sex with them. I think that's what's going on. And everybody's like, they don't date. They don't have social skills. They don't have our social skills. Their social skills are ridiculous. Like, kid that Brewer brought in yesterday, he's not like the most social person face to face, but the kid knows how to socialize in the modern digital world. So that's what they were saying. There's like 10,000 condoms were supplied and they were gone fast. And you know what they're saying is the impetus of this heated rivalry, that show about gay hockey, which is, look, every guy you Talk, I had 3 women yesterday try to tell me how great this show is. And then it's just, it's. It's ridiculous. I'm not going to name names, but somewhere in this city, there's going to be a heated rivalry watch party and then a Saturday night live watch party party. Because the dude from the gay guy from heated rivalry is hosting it and women are in love with him. So congratulations to all those people who I laughed at years ago. I was wrong. That said, oh, they're indoctrinating people into making women want their husbands to be gay. Like, they want all men to be game. Like, that's crazy talk. And now you see that the biggest thing in the world right now currently for women and all they're talking about about is he did rivalry and these two hot gay guys making out, which used to be gross. It used to only be lesbians making out. That got people going. Not anymore. These two dudes evidently have ladies for who? Gosh, I'm still old school. I'm still old school. It's not for men. I've mentioned several times, it's for women and not for men. We don't get it. In fact, you talk to most guys, I'm like, what the hell is heated rivalry? And it's supposed to be about sports, but we sniff it out real fast. Like, this ain't about sports immediately. You know, I'm not watching. This is weird. Weird. I watched a couple episodes. I thought it was a little bit, like, I'm not interested in two men falling in love. I cannot relate to that. I tried watching Brokeback Mountain. I thought it was a beautifully shot, a wonderful story. It just drug on a little bit. And when Jack twist, spit and sell that scene. Look, you didn't. You didn't like it because it was gay. And you don't want to watch it. I can get past that because I'm not gay. It doesn't threaten me. I don't care. I don't care if gay guys make out or do it. Fine. It's just not going to do anything for me. Ladies are losing their corks over this thing. And they say that the, the heated rivalry thing spawned a bunch of stuff. At the Olympics. There were three proposals by athletes. One I didn't even know. Like, there was an ice dancer who was rivals with another ice dancer. Like they were teams. And at the end they proposed to each other. One was from Sweden, was from like Switzerland. I don't know the countries. And then at the end they're like, they were in. They were in competition with each other. In the end they proposed. There's another lesbian couple that proposed to each other at the Olympics. One guy proposed it. Like, they said it was all heated rivalry stuff, that they're rivals on the, on the court, but they are in love, you know, and it was like, whoa. And the heated rivalry thing is. But women, please don't go up to men and ask if we've watched Heated Rivalry because none of us have. And then don't, after we say no, start telling us how great it is because we're. Most of us are just going to dodge it. It. It's like Bridgerton. You tried to sell us on Bridgerton as something to watch and dudes just watched it and went, oh, it's just old lady porn. Like, what? Yeah, it's. It's non graphic old lady porn. You guys, like, you don't care about anything historic because there's no way this black guy would have gotten away with any of this back.

[Brett Vesely]

Exactly. That one doesn't make sense.

[John Holmberg]

We as men are logical going, boy, if I was a black, I'd be mad because this is like having for no reason at all, like a black dude on the 27 Yankees and doing a movie about him. Like, that's not. You can't do that. He wouldn't have been. Been nice to him. So we looked at that like, oh, you ladies are kind of rewriting history here a little bit. And it's gonna. Anyway, you just like old lady porn.

[Brady Bogan]

Yesterday was a double whammy. Bridgerton listed your horoscope and what character you'd be on. Bridgerton.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. Wow.

[Brett Vesely]

I've never watched it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeesh. Yeah, it's because it's not for us. Right? But then ladies will start to say it's like us trying to Explain. I don't know, like, WWE to an average woman, go. And then, you know, hey, you didn't see Hornswoggle came out from under. Women look at you like you're an idiot. That's how we look at you now with this heated rivalry. We don't care about gay hockey. We've got real hockey to watch, and we don't want them kissing at the end. For the most part, it's probably a small group of people that are like, man, I wish. I wish Hughes and Hellebuck would have made out. I'm sure there's a couple guys that would have thought that was cool. I'm not one of them, but, man, this thing's going crazy. But they're saying that that's the reason why they're sexually charged at the Olympics, because for some reason, heated rivalry has something to do with that. Downstairs, I had two ladies. Oh, are you watching?

[Brady Bogan]

They were trying to say that, you know, even before the Olympics, that they've noticed a. An uptick of hockey tickets.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Chicks are watching hockey thinking that at the end, they have some sort of man gang bang. And they don't. Thank God, because that would not be good. But. But again, 15 years ago, when the argument was, oh, they're pushing gay on us. They're trying to make us all gay. Alex Jones, they're gonna try to make you gay. And I'm like, that's crazy. Now, in order to get a girl, part of the fun is gonna be like, she's really turned on when dudes kiss.

[Brady Bogan]

So now it's switching around.

[John Holmberg]

Think about it.

[Brady Bogan]

The girls are on. Hey, you guys make out?

[John Holmberg]

Turnabout's fair play. We've been trying this with women for 50 years and finally got them to start doing it in the late 90s, and then it became normal. Now it's kind of boring. They're spinning it on us, and there's dudes that are gonna do it.

[Brett Vesely]

Now we've got to look up the interview that Sean Strickland did about heated rivalry.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I saw that. Sean Strickland is not someone you want to follow.

[Brett Vesely]

He's all like, it sounds like Brett was in his earpiece.

[John Holmberg]

Sean Strickland is.

[Brett Vesely]

I haven't seen it yet.

[John Holmberg]

He's. You think. You know, the fat ladies think I say some stuff. Sean Strickland makes me go, okay, dude, that's. You're. That's a lot. Lot. I. I admire his bravery because it is cancelable in every direction every time he opens his mouth. But, you know, he's not wrong in this particular case. Just weird. So. Yeah. But he did rivalry. If it's sexy to you, that's great, but don't try to explain it to your husband. And certainly don't make it one of those things where we have to watch that with you. You can watch stuff along.

[Brady Bogan]

It.

[John Holmberg]

It is. It is. Just not. Not for us. It is weird fantasy of. And. And that's it. Chicks liking gay guys kissing.

[Brady Bogan]

That.

[John Holmberg]

I. I didn't think that was going to happen. So much hair, so much poop. But you watch two chiseled, like, foreigners making out, and evidently that's what it took. But it took 15 or 16 years for them to finally go, I think they're ready. And they put this out. And the ladies are just squirting all over the place watching the show. So now they're going to look at you, Brady. It's like heated rivalry. And it's going to be like, well, first off, he doesn't look anything like these hockey players there, so check that box. He's out. But would he. Would he consider blowing a hot Russian?

[Brady Bogan]

That's why it was.

[John Holmberg]

And that's where you're gonna. He's gonna be like, you want to spice things up in the bedroom? Heated rivalry is changing that. I want to bring a man into the bedroom. Like, I don't think that's out. Yeah. I think I'm gonna have to go.

[Brady Bogan]

You're not. You know the difference between he's rivalry and then whatever happened in the movie with the guy from Parks and Rec.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, and fallout. And fallout.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You didn't like that Because a lot of the beard kissing. That's what I get. I can't watch that. So much hair. So much. And that's another thing we said.

[Brady Bogan]

The different. You know, it's the difference in the attraction.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Appearance doesn't bother me that they were gay. I just think about myself and another bearded individual smashing faces, and I giggle because I'm like, that's just weird. I think of my Uncle Doug who had this big, thick beard, and I'm like, if you ever start making out with another dude, that's gross. Gross. Like the picture ZZ Top, like, getting after. That's gross. And. And we all think that's gross. And it's not so much the homosexuality. It's the. It's the. It's the hair. And keep in mind, ladies, we also. And you're doing it to us now, so it's fair. We also made it so generations that never shaved down south suddenly was enough pressure from us. Thank you, Playboy and the early days of the Internet. Internet. We made it. So you guys balled it up down there. We made it a billion dollar industry to go get your hairs ripped out. So we. We've never liked hair.

[Brady Bogan]

No.

[John Holmberg]

So it makes sense that we wouldn't want to make out with a dude because the furry nature of. Of that.

[Brady Bogan]

Imagine if they twisted Roadhouse back in the day. It was Sam Elliott and the SW

[John Holmberg]

up in the barn out. Oh my God. Whip out your dick, Miho. I like when you do twirly kicks. Yeah. And then you just hear the dude abides. Yeah. We've never liked hair. We've never wanted to make out with hair. So we talked you guys into thinking that it was a good idea to get rid of that. And your body grows hair down there for a reason. It's a protective measure against any hole in your body. And notice that every hole in your body usually has hair. Your mouth is the only one that men do it. But like eyelashes, eyebrows, they're all designed to protect the openings and your B hole and all that stuff. Your ears end up getting a little hairy. Everything has got it because it's a. It's a sensor. Like curb feelers.

[Brady Bogan]

It's your offensive line. It is.

[John Holmberg]

It's the first line of defense. Hey, something's down there. Like your hair goes tinkle. We talked you guys into getting rid of it because it was kind of gross to us. So this gay thing is taking off and congratulations. Good job. I mean, hey, look, I got no problem with it. I know where I line up. I can watch it and not have any feelings at all. I just am not interested because I can't relate to it. So please ladies, stop the heated rivalry. It's huge. Yeah, it's huge with ladies. It's lady porn. And that's awesome. We have our porn. You have your porn. You have your crazy stuff.

[Brady Bogan]

That's great.

[John Holmberg]

That's great. I'm happy you found something you love. But I'll stick to my DUA Leap of fantasies which aren't going to come real. And you stick to gay hockey players and we'll just, we, we. We'll have our little. We'll go two different directions. We're not. We don't have to line on everything. Especially cuz mine's not gross with lots of hair. All that hair floating, all that. Oh, you imagine that?

[Brady Bogan]

No.

[John Holmberg]

You see those finishing moves and some porns and you're like, imagine if that was if she had like a big Thick beard. Oh,

[Brett Vesely]

I think her three days of coma.

[Josh Blue]

All the.

[John Holmberg]

Then they're just rubbing it. I can't get it all out.

[Brady Bogan]

Conditioning.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's gross. And then you. You know, sometimes it's kind of hot at the end of the porn to see a lady who looks like she just went through a milk factory. Not if there was, like, a big beard, though. See, that's how guys think. So stop. Yeah, Enjoy your heated rivalry and don't try to drag us into it. And it doesn't make us bad to not want to watch it now.

[Brett Vesely]

The worst is when you go on there and you see the little thumbnails that start up a little bit. Oh, she's hot. Okay, maybe. And then they go down, and it's like. Like, you know the Amazon down there? I'm like, all right, I'm out.

[John Holmberg]

Next. Next. I didn't buy the Black Crows album that I wanted because the. The. And then they had to change it, remember? Because they're like, man. People aren't buying it because the album cover was a lady in a bikini, but she hadn't shaved since Nixon and the stuff was flying out of the bikini. I'm like, I'm not. I'm not owning that. That's gross. People want to call it homophobia. It's herophobia. It's disgusting to lock up fuzzy bits. It's gross. You complain and get a free meal if there's one hair in your food in a restaurant. But making out with a hair, that makes sense. Women, you have to. I know. And, you know, from their perspective, they make out with us. And we've got beards, so it doesn't bother them. It bothers us. So don't try to make that a thing. And great that you love your old lady porn. It is old lady porn. I've never. I have not. It's lady softcore. Cinemax. That's what we used to love. Late at night.

[Brett Vesely]

So it's like that 50 Shades of Gray type thing.

[John Holmberg]

I've never watched 50 Shades of Gray. The first one. It's not a good same kind of

[Brady Bogan]

vibe, in a way. I mean, it attracts the same people.

[John Holmberg]

It's. It's old lady porn. Yeah, it's housewife porn. And that's not about. People will be like, that's offense. Why is that offensive? That's. It's good. They think we're making fun. We're just not interested. And that's where they get upset. If we're not interested in the thing they're interested in, they we think we're mad at them or we're making fun of them, making fun of their thing. It's just weird to us. There's a lot of stuff women are. He's an idiot. We're doing that back to you now. I said, I just found out that Catherine met Rachel on a Reddit forum called Bridger Three and a Half ton. Yeah, that's exactly right. The six o' clock word is purge. We get that in there and maybe you'll go see Metallica up in Vegas. This as a Bridgerton nude scenes is the subject. It says, I tried looking them up because I'm a DJ who just wants to see boobs. And when I looked it up, it showed a fat chick. And I about threw up from. I didn't want to. I almost think it should be taken off the air for showing people something so repulsive. All right, you're taking it too far.

[Brady Bogan]

That was a brave scene.

[John Holmberg]

Well, she was very brave. Technical off in the camera. I. I watched a little bridge or two. Like, this is just silly. If I was black, I would boycott this show. This is. This just make me angry that they have skirted history. So of course you would have been insulting Rachel. Yeah, it would be like the Jackie Robinson story starring John C. Reilly. Like, why? Why? It's just, why would you cast a white man to play Jackie Robinson? I always love that. I've said it for years. Baseball's here and they have that. We're celebrating 125 years of the team. We're going to have throwback week. And then I never forget when the Cubs did their. Whatever anniversary it was and they did throwback jerseys. Batting for the Cubs, leading off, center fielder Dexter Fowler. And I remember Len Casper saying, Dexter's in a 1934 wool. And I'm like, oh, boy. He wasn't allowed. And that's the first dude to wear that who's looking like Dexter Fowler. 1934 wool Cubs outfit. Dexter, you're a pioneer.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They shouldn't have put him in it, but they did. They had throwbacks. Anything before 1947 they should have never thrown back to and then made black players wear it. That's terrible. Bridgerton's the same as that.

[Brett Vesely]

That's your Red Sox fan. And be like, 1970 once Ted Williams,

[John Holmberg]

you can hire whatever you want. You go ahead and put them on the team. Now I'm gone. Ted Williams was evidently the world's biggest racist and held the keys to what the Red Sox were going to put on the field and nary a brown skinned man played with Ted Williams, that's for sure. They started pushing him around a little towards the end there, but they were the last to integrate and that was also the city of Boston going, ah, we'll be all right. And then they realized we're not going to win anything unless we hire Louis Teon today. Give us A Wake up song 585-9800 a good one and we'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD Wake Up Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station

[Nick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

It's John Holmberg here. Time to talk about TV. Doug Hopkins of my home group and doughns. Com. I got an email from someone who told me that he wants to sell his house because he has to move for work, got a new job and it starts in February so he needs to vacate quickly. And in this particular case, this guy can leave Arizona with cash from his home and be free and clear to start anew in his next location. That is peace of mind no matter what the situation. Doug makes selling your house so easy it's hard to imagine going anywhere else and he backs it up with a $5,000 guarantee. Start the process@doug hopkins.com and grab that phone and sing Hopkins. 1-800-sale now.

[Ron Capps]

You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[John Holmberg]

What the hell is wrong with you?

[Ron Capps]

Walker told me I had aids.

[John Holmberg]

No. Poor little fella. All righty. Five more minutes and you can throw the word purge into our our Metallica concert. Sending you up to Sphere to see Metallica in Vegas October 1st and October survey free. That is pretty awesome stuff as we get you all tuned up there. Get your hotel. 200 bucks in fuel. Love it. I had to go to the doctor yesterday for the eye. A little follow up on my eyeball situation. And, you know, everything's going really well. And he told me like seven or eight more days. So you gotta. You're in the crux of making this good, right?

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, it tiny bubbles yet?

[John Holmberg]

No, I still got a big bubble in the eye. It's about. Half my eye is bubble. Half my eyes suck. Bite it. And it's weird. Like, it's. It's. It's going away, but the bubble moves around like crazy. It's kind of fun. It's like having a constant teardrop affect your vision. And it won't. You can't wipe it away. It's inside your eyes really kind of at this point, it's gotten neat, but I can finally kind of see out of my right eye. So he goes through and he goes, now you're at the crucial time where you can start being normal again, but you can also still screw this up. And he said, so you don't have to. To lay on your stomach. Like you're. I'm like, oh, thank God. And so you can kind of be more positioned. Don't lay on your back. Let's not strain. Don't lift anything. Don't take any heavy shots. Don't punch. Don't get punched. And I'm like, all right. And he goes, these next six or seven days are crucial because you're going to be normal. I'm like, oh. And then he showed me a picture of the bubble in my eye. It's so weird. And then. And I said, that's exactly it. It's a picture of. It's just a ball on the screen. Screen. And then you see this line going

[Brady Bogan]

through the middle like a Magic 8 ball.

[John Holmberg]

It's exactly that. It's exactly that stuff. It's that liquid in the Magic 8 Ball.

[Brett Vesely]

Ask again.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Signs say you're blind. And then. So I looked at the picture of my eyeball, and then I said, there. And he goes, there's the bubble. And he points, right? And it's exactly. Half of my eyesight is affected by the. The bubble. And I look like, that's it. And he goes, well, the amazing thing is, is that that's actually on top of top. It's not on the bottom. And I'm like. And then. And then I had to be reminded that moment where you realize that we're going 11, 000 miles an hour, and then 64, 000 miles an hour and 670,000 miles an hour. Just by being on Earth. We're rotating at 11,000. We're moving at 64 around the sun, and we're hurtling through space at almost a million. That. That sometimes registers with me. And I'm like, huh. And then this guy hits me yesterday with the thing that just mind effed me all day.

[Brady Bogan]

Day.

[John Holmberg]

Everything you see is actually upside down.

[Brady Bogan]

I think about that one of those old cameras, they put you under the.

[John Holmberg]

The cup under the hood, and they

[Brady Bogan]

look under the lens and everything that you're looking at is upside down.

[John Holmberg]

It's reversed, but that's this Earth that you see is actually upside down.

[Brady Bogan]

What?

[John Holmberg]

You didn't know that?

[Brett Vesely]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Your eye flips everything over.

[Brett Vesely]

I learned something new today.

[John Holmberg]

There you go. Mess with you forever. Because now you got to realize that Brady's hanging from the ceiling, essentially. Yeah, I know. That's a strong.

[Brett Vesely]

So is Rachel.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God.

[Brady Bogan]

Jesus.

[John Holmberg]

She's the only one that actually. Your eye flips it back over to make sure that you don't get crushed by her. Isn't that crazy, though? Like everything. Oh, look, Brad.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm dancing on the scene.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, man. Technically, we're just used to everything being upside down.

[Brady Bogan]

That's wild.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And. Yeah, it'll mess with you all day. And then he's like, yeah. Technically, what you see is the bubble that's affecting the lower half of my vision is actually affecting the top half of my vision. But then my eye flips it. Your eye, for some reason, flips everything. All of it is upside down. It's so crazy. But is it? Because that isn't. Because what I see is upside down. But we just call it right side up. So again, it's man made to say this is normal. We could call this upside down and understand what it is. But then it flips. So we just were just. It's such a concept. You can't understand. Everything is actually pointing the other way. What? And again, 11,000 miles, 70,000 miles in a hour around the sun. And then the galaxy is just. Just flaming at a million miles an hour. We're doing that right now. You're on a little ball that's currently going about a million miles an hour through the vastness of space. And you're. And everything you see is the opposite of what you think you're seeing. Oh, my God.

[Brady Bogan]

It's working, man.

[John Holmberg]

It's. You know what? We're just. I don't know what's happening, but it. It's enough to Screw you up, that's for sure. Oh, here we go. Saying it for years, John. Everything you see is not what you're actually seeing. You're being lied to. Everything's upside down. Those kids and stranger things were right. Everything's in the Upside Down.

[Brady Bogan]

I haven't checked out any of the things that Jim Brewer gave us yesterday.

[John Holmberg]

I haven't either. Yeah, Jim gave us a list of things to go down the rabbit hole of.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, I don't want to. Not yet. I gotta have a weekend to do that.

[John Holmberg]

Actually, the crazy thing is, after I got my eyes dilated, I'm like, I got a coup hours to kill. I'll go through Jim Brewer's list of crazy and. And after the dude hit me with everything's upside down, I went back into the Neil DeGrasse Tyson. We're fine. I ain't doing this today. I'm not one. One thing at a time. I could have turned bright red and go crazy. I'm gonna do it on my own time. I'm not on your timeline, Brady. I'll do it when I'm comfortable, not when you tell me to be. I'm doing it. That screws you up, though.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, I literally just know.

[John Holmberg]

Absolutely.

[Brett Vesely]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

I learned in the eighth grade. But I get reminded of it every once in a while.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, maybe I. Maybe I heard it in the eighth grade and forgot. Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Just to absorb it.

[John Holmberg]

You were busy, like, probably writing down something terrible to another guy, and then you and him were laughing. Infinite.

[Brady Bogan]

I just said, not with my rose colored lenses.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Brady's in. Those things are actually on the other way. Or not on you. The way you say. It's just so weird. Like all the signs you see are. They're upside down. It's. It's the craziest thought that you're.

[Brady Bogan]

But the brain is the one that flips it. Right?

[John Holmberg]

So I think something in your.

[Brady Bogan]

Gotta be your mind.

[John Holmberg]

No. Your retina moves it and then your brain says, that's better for me. Balance. But it's like all combined. But right now, like, yeah, it's. Your brain can do it, but it actually gets flipped over by your. It's a cone.

[Brady Bogan]

So I wonder if there's a condition where the person. Where it malfunctions, where people.

[John Holmberg]

Here's the thing. I always thought it doesn't.

[Brady Bogan]

They see everything.

[John Holmberg]

Here's the thing. I've always said I don't know what you see, what your normal is.

[Brady Bogan]

I know you say this.

[John Holmberg]

You're assuming my normal is your normal. I Don't know. And I've often said that, like, Brett's normal might look neon to. To me, and my normal might look just dull and weird to you.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, you find out. You know, you find out the commonality, at least on you say, okay, do we agree that this is red?

[John Holmberg]

No, you agree on those. You agree on the word red. You do not agree on the color.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, it's like those Facebook memes that were going around years ago.

[John Holmberg]

What.

[Brett Vesely]

What color is this? Yeah. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Like, if that. I see that chair is black, and so do you, because the majority of people have called that black. But I don't.

[Brady Bogan]

I don't see color on that chair.

[John Holmberg]

I don't. I don't either. That chair is colorless to me, and it can whatever it wants in this great nation. That's a good chair. God damn it. I'll fight anybody who says different, but you and I, through time have seen that as black. I don't know if you see black the way I see black, and I know you don't, because there's that thing where they'll do a spectrum check, and some people will look at a page and see. And they count out the lines, like, see 34 colors. And another guy will go, I see eight. Like, your eyes don't see the same, but you'll. You'll look at, like. That's why some people are like, that's kind of yellow, and it's like. I think it's green.

[Brady Bogan]

And some people don't see a certain color.

[John Holmberg]

Right? But. Well, yeah, like.

[Brady Bogan]

Like don't pick up greens.

[John Holmberg]

So I don't know if your eyes flip it over and neither do you, because what you are used to is just normal to you. I assume they do.

[Brady Bogan]

We just go with, you know, this chair is black. Okay.

[Wayne]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

No matter. No matter what you see. No matter what I see. We were taught the word black to apply to that. And you might see black and brown, and so the majority of people say, this is black. So you were taught that color is black, and in your brain, you're like, that's black. But it might. It might be bright purple to you. And to me, it's a dark, you know, shadowy thing. But we can't explain it because we. We've normalized in our brain. Your brain plays the tricks. You can't say, say, my green and your green are exactly the same. Chances are they are. But I don't know that I would look at you, you know, I mean, think about your. Your. Your eyesight as you took Jesus this is going to get deep your eyesight as you change with age, it dulls. The colors aren't as bright when you're a kid. They see colors so different, you don't know whose eyes are seeing what. And we just assume we all see the same stuff. I would love to, like for a day, Elon Musk, plug into Brett's brain and see all the black that he sees. What?

[Brady Bogan]

You'll see nothing but eggplant.

[John Holmberg]

Nothing. Yeah, just black colors. And everywhere, everything is like a purplish hue. It's everywhere. Like, Brett, is this all you see? But yeah. And I don't know that Brady's like the one of those cartoon hounds that only sees, like, his colors are kind of gray until there's a pie on a windowsill and then that looks like a turkey. Brady. Brady could be like a video game where the next thing you're supposed to touch glows of that thing there. It's like a pie or a turkey or. I don't know. But it's interesting to think about. And that dude effed me up yesterday because he's like, yeah, actually, that's flipped over. I mean, technically, to be realistic, if this was a real picture of your eye, that would be on the top, but.

[Brady Bogan]

Shut up.

[John Holmberg]

But yeah, I know. I'm like, just shut up. We're going a million miles an hour. You realize that I can't take all that. But here we sit floating around in our, you know, soup up CRVs or whatever. CRX little thing. We put mufflers on them and do donuts and intersections, thinking we're going super fast and how cool we are. And you are a speck of nothingness floating through a plane. The corner of the interstellar everything. You are in the corner of space. Tiny little dot. And we're so arrogant to think that we're the most important thing. Thing. Million miles an hour again, that stat of light speed. In our galaxy, by itself, it would take eight minutes to get to the sun at light speed, like 30 seconds or something to get to the moon and 200,000 years to get from one end to the other of the galaxy at light speed. That's how big it is. That's its size. That's insane. And you're. And by the way, everything you see while you're going through lightspeed is actually the other. It's up to. None of this makes sense why. Why Rachel and Catherine are so mad about being fat and flipping around and mad at a radio show. It should. Should dawn on them that they're lucky enough that we are in a planet that can house their massive size and still go a million miles an hour. And I just got a letter from a scientist that said since Rachel and Catherine were born in the 80s, the planet has slowed down substantially because we're dragging a lot of weight.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. But it's still a restless planet. Planet syndrome. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Well, they're shaking. It's always moving. They're shaking it up for sure. And here's another thing I don't have time for anymore and I'm not gonna be nice about it. You're. And I love animals. But enough with the emotional support things. There's a dude, there's a professor who now has he wanted to travel on a plane with an emotional support chicken. Nope, nope, nope, and nope. You're not allowed to walk. You're walking. You can't get on a plane with normal people with a chicken and try to make us all hat he delicious. Oh, yeah, they stopped him. He was carrying a chicken around. Anybody walking around with a chicken at the airport, unless it's in Mumbai or Bangladesh, you're not allowed on my plane. It's not. I mean even. Look, even spirit would be like, no chickens. We draw the line right here. They don't even let you have like your own food on the plane. Elijah. You can't bring a chicken and call it. And it says. And this is what he said as a Canadian psychology professor. Professor. He studies how relationships with pets support healthy development and has own usual therapy, which is true. Like equine therapy for kids with hippotherapy. The tiz and things like that. There's hippotherapy.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, that's what they horses called. They call that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Rachel's going through.

[John Holmberg]

I thought it was equine, like the equine therapy. Is it hippotherapy? They call it hippotherapy with horses.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, I didn't know that. So anyway, yeah, there's, that. There's all sorts of different animals. Animals that will support you, but chickens aren't it. And then so the, the guy said it assists me in my daily life. I feel like she's so smart, she can understand my emotions. And it's an 11 month old bird named Saturday and they, they adopted it from a.

[Brady Bogan]

It's from that Clint Eastwood movie.

[John Holmberg]

Look, the rooster.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Okay. When I said when I was sad, she would just lay there and look at me because that's what a chicken does. That's all they do. Trying to figure out what was going on. No, that was you applying that to her brain. In her brain. She just. That's it. That's all she's thinking. And I knew that she was thinking, why are you crying? And it meant the world to me. It's. It's. We gotta get back to the straightjackets, people. We've got to get back to the straight jackets she even crafted. This lady crafted a special diaper for the feather baby so it can travel with her wherever she goes. Goes. She's lost her mind and she has no friends. And that's what we need. We need people to set you straight again. If you're walking around with an emotional support chicken and nobody's saying anything, the thing you need most of all is to realize you don't have one good friend in your life. It's like my friend Anthony. I was at the Suns game with him a while ago, and he goes, you know, you don't have any friends in your life. I'm like, what are you talking about? He goes, you don't have one good friend except me? And I'm like, what's he doing? Doing? And he goes, you got something hanging out of your nose. I'm like, oh, my God. Like, I've been sitting here talking to people. He goes, not one of them said a thing. Yeah, little thing in your life.

[Brady Bogan]

There's a sickle coming out of.

[John Holmberg]

Oh. And then I'm just turning to people. We're at the Rah Rah room, of all places. And I turn, I'm like, kenzie, was there something in my nose? I didn't see it. I'm like, thank God. Word for seven o', clock, by the way, is Kirk. Thank you, Brad. Kirk. Kirk as in Hammond kirk at the 7:00'. Clock.

[Brady Bogan]

Word.

[John Holmberg]

So I'm, you know, like, Liv, some of my. Ryan was there something in my. And I was freaking out. And luckily. And even Anthony turned to me afterwards, and he goes, they're not gonna tell you. They all saw it. And I'm like, God damn it. And I realized that Anthony had just jumped up about seven rungs on the friend ladder because my friend Mark, best friend since fifth grade, he was there. He didn't say anything. My friend Dr. Brink was there. He didn't say anything. Anthony was the only one. If you've got an emotional support chicken, you need an Anthony in your life to go, hey, hey. You've gone bad, crazy, and nobody wants to deal with you except this chicken. If you're down to a chicken as your only friend on the planet. Do a little self evaluation. Recognize that it's over unless you make some serious changes. Don't dive in and hug the chicken harder. Start to kind of distance yourself from the chicken. So remember when Brady was a kid and took that black lady to show and tell Olive. You know, nowadays they could call that your emotional support Negro. You know, he's not wrong, though. It's a joke for Grant and it's working. You nailed your audience there, Guillermo. Nice job. But he's not wrong that if you start attaching silliness to silliness, people are like, well, I gotta take that serious seriously. Let me be the first say I'm no longer taking that seriously. Especially if you have that. Now. Brady does have rod.

[Brady Bogan]

She flies free.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I mean, then she's getting something out of it.

[Brady Bogan]

Emotional support animals. They charge them.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Hippotherapy and equine assisted therapy. Right. It includes that physical and occupation of the horse's gate.

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I have a friend who's got a kid with the tears, a little tears. And he's doing the equine therapy. And it's. It's doing them wonders.

[Brady Bogan]

Send that guy with a chicken over to Dubai and get on a plane there. Because they have falcons. They only allow so many falcons on a plane.

[John Holmberg]

Falcons are cool, though. And I don't think anybody's like, this is my emotional support chicken does now, John.

[Brett Vesely]

I think Rachel brought her emotional support chicken on the flight too. It was original recipe.

[John Holmberg]

Come on. I saw that one coming down. 50 seconds. It took a long time. Forever wrote that. You were right, though. It's a good one still. But yeah, I don't think the emotional bird of prey is something they're really leaning on too heavy in Dubai. It's like, the guy's a falcon profession. It's his job, and he's not putting it underneath. It'll freak the falcon out. He's got it. It's under control. But a chicken? No. There is chicken therapy, however, poultry therapy. It's when seniors in care facilities call that eating wings.

[Brady Bogan]

You know what it is?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That is poultry therapy for a guy like Brady. And it' not working. It's killing. But chicken therapy. Listen to what they call chicken therapy. And this is where we've just got. We've got to normalize as a society. And all of us start saying, enough. Chicken therapy is used when seniors in care facilities do a thing. Poultry therapy, hen power. They're utilizing therapy. Chickens or emotional support. Chickens aim to improve mental health, reduce loneliness, and combat dementia. And seniors, what they do though, though is put them to work caring for the chick. They give them a job to make sure that it's not the chicken. Understanding your anxiety, it's you getting up and doing stuff. Because if you don't use it, you're gonna lose it. If you're. If your brain keep them on the farm. Yeah. If your brain doesn't get tested, it's gonna start shutting down. It's atrophy. It happens in your muscles and your organs and everything else. It says it helps with anxiety, depression and loneliness. It gives them a purpose. So they take old people to chickens and make them do stuff and. But none of those old people. The second an old person says that chicken understands me, then they got to go into a different hallway and start getting treatment in another way because they're losing it. It's nursing home schools, individuals, autism, stuff. Like they give them a purpose. It isn't emotional support. Stop it. The chicken does not get get you. He understands me like no other human can. Oh, grandma's gone. Time to hospice. That you just get comfortable and lay down, hun. Ah. Why? Because you think a chicken can read your mind? And that is the end. It's over. You're not coming back from this. You never hear a 90 year old going, for a little while there I thought a chicken could understand me. Like they never come out of it.

[Brady Bogan]

That could like detect seizures or something like that.

[John Holmberg]

You know, like a dog seizure detecting chicken.

[Brady Bogan]

You prove it, there it goes.

[John Holmberg]

You both start flipping out and like, I don't want to be near that. Can we get a little calmer animal to start predicting seizures, starts crowing,

[Brady Bogan]

she's

[John Holmberg]

going to have a seizure. I'm going to kill that chicken.

[Brett Vesely]

Brandon brings up a good point. Because I've been saying this for years, I think it also applies to smells and taste as well.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, the eyeball thing. Like everything's different. Yeah. You've been taught that's what chicken smells like. I don't know what Brady smells when he smells chicken. I know he likes it.

[Brady Bogan]

Heaven.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And I know I like what I smell as chicken, but I wonder if we got to freaky Friday for a day day. And you're like, oh my God, your smell of chicken is orgasmic. I understand you now.

[Josh Blue]

Like, this is.

[Brady Bogan]

This is finally.

[John Holmberg]

This is ejaculate worthy. My smell is fairly muted compared to that. And you'd be like, your chicken smells like socks. Like you wouldn't know. We don't know for sure. I'm sure it applies and taste for sure.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Because you think cilantro tastes like soap. And I think it tastes fantastic. Same thing. So why wouldn't our eyes be different? Why wouldn't our smells be different? You know, I could get into Brett's head and. And his hearing could just be like high end distortion. And that's normal to you. And it would drive me nuts. And you'd listen to me and be like, that's what you consider distortion. And that's my clarity. You just don't know. Just don't know. By the way, my friend just texted. He said you can name my son. Justin is the one doing the equine therapy, and he's loving it. Sent me a picture of him on the horse. I think that's awesome. But you don't carry it on a plane.

[Brady Bogan]

That one guy tried to. I think I remember it was a miniature pony on a plane. Tried to get.

[John Holmberg]

No. Yeah. This guy says, as a Jew. Now, you said you're in a crucial time with your eye, so don't look at any restaurant bills because a lot of the times they recommend 25 tips. You son of a. That's not what he meant by being in a crucial time with my eye. The word for seven o' clock is Kirk. Put that in there. Get your friends all loaded up, are ready to go. Go on my, my, my plan for you, which is that awesome text thread that you should put together and get all the words and things like that and have people who don't listen to the station fire back and get in there with you. So here you go. That's a good thing right there. Oops, I forgot about that. I can't read right now. I got. I'm going through my thing and I'm trying to. I'm struggling to see the thing. I can't read.

[Brady Bogan]

Look, the. Oh, oh, planners guy. When you're reading.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I kind of feel that way. I want to say congratulations to Brett again. High five. No kids. And to all you people with kids, I'm sorry. They've gotten dumber than I thought they could possibly get. The Tide Pod challenge. They're doing all sorts of silly stuff. There's a new thing you have to worry about for your dumbass kid, right? Starting with Kirby and her dumb friends, the goons of Gilbert. There's a new trend going around called bone smash mashing, where kids are challenging each other to hit themselves in the face with a hammer. Go get them. Go get them. Dumbass.

[Brett Vesely]

Encourage this if you're gonna be that dumb.

[John Holmberg]

I am finally for Kirby's not shoes or rubber mallet. Well, that's where they start. That's the gateway. The gateway drug to the bone smashing is the rubber mallet.

[Brett Vesely]

It's the marijuana to the cocaine.

[Josh Blue]

I can't even get bruises from this anymore, man. I tell you what, I'm gonna smash away her squeaks.

[John Holmberg]

Morning sickness medicate K It's John Holmer here from the morning sickness and it's time to talk about Doug Hopkins of my home group and dough hopkins.com let's talk about the people who make claims. For instance, a company out there saying they'll get you 100% of market value for your home. And a lot of times Mr. 100% getting that inspection and says oh, 100% just dropped because you've got a few more problems. Don't play around with these people. Trust me when I say you can trust TV's Doug Hopkins. He won't play with the offer at all. If he does, he'll give you $5,000 guaranteed. You can start process@doug hopkins.com or grab that phone and sing. It's John Holberg here from the morning sickness and I'm absolutely thrilled to tell you about my [e-mail] you've heard me mention Kevin Costner, Trey McBride, other countless celebrities and pro athletes and how they chose lifted trucks. But that doesn't mean it's only for actors and pro athletes. It's for all of you. Everybody who loves a cool adventure. So if you're a huge celebrity like me or just an average Joe who wants the best truck available, head on over to lifted trucks. They live up to being the number one custom truck dealer for for over 30 years. 10,000 five star reviews can't be wrong. Lifted trucks.com work hard, play hard, drive harder. Holmberg's morning sickness. If you're clear of this thing on social media, you might not have heard of this, but a 20 year old content creator named Clavicular has started this thing. It's they, they will literally take a hammer and hit themselves in the face and try not to smash a bone. But if they do, it's kind of a win. It's an attention. Will one of you parents out there please pay attention to your children for 20 minutes. Stop letting the little plastic man with the flag watch them when they're outside and talk to them here. And again. So they stop this. This is a cry for help. Go on their Instagram again. It's time to toss the cell. That's another Moment where you guys have today. Brady won't do it. I don't think he ever has. Grab Kirby.

[Brady Bogan]

Stanley.

[John Holmberg]

Huh?

[Brady Bogan]

The brand of the hammer.

[John Holmberg]

That's exactly right. You go through Kirby, so I know you won't because it'll upset her and you don't like to do that. That, but not my precious time to toss the phone, go through it, see what she's up to.

[Brady Bogan]

I. I have no doubt. My mind. I'm not talking, okay?

[John Holmberg]

You don't know that. That's what every dumb parent says. That is what every child. Well, no, it's on your kid's face. And. And. And that's it. Never ever say, I know my kid won't. Every parent of a drug addict, every parent of a murderer. I watch a lot of date. They interviewed the parents. Like, we had no idea. Like, not our child. Every parent thinks their kid won't do the bone smashing thing. Do you think the guy who does it, his parents were like, oh, we knew the whole time he was gonna smash himself in the face with a hammer. And of course, pretty much, no, they didn't. They didn't. Nobody ever thinks that.

[Brett Vesely]

Matthew said.

[John Holmberg]

John.

[Brett Vesely]

Thank God. Finally, some thinning of the herd.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, I'm fine with that part. But they're not dying. They're hurting themselves. They're creating.

[Brett Vesely]

Swing harder.

[John Holmberg]

If we're gonna do anything with bone smash, it's swing harder kids. Us non kid havers encouraging the hell out of Sledgehammer Bone crush. I don't care. Don't go, baby. Hammers don't go. You know, hanging pictures. Hammers.

[Brady Bogan]

At least do it for a cause.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, try to stop Alzheimer's by smashing yourself in the brain. It's brilliant. But, Brady, you make the crucial error as a parent of saying, well, I know for a fact my kid would never. And then the next thing you know, you're in a jail cell in an interrogation room going, what did you guys do again?

[Josh Blue]

Well, man, I mean, we were out

[John Holmberg]

and just goofed around when the goons

[Josh Blue]

said, let's hit him. So I was there.

[John Holmberg]

I just watched a special on Hulu about two teen kids who just picked people at random at school, and they murdered one of the girls named Cassie. And then in the interrogation room, it was unbelievable how good they were at lying about it while their parents were like, he's telling the truth. There's no question he's telling the tr. My son would never do something. You see how emotional is? And even after these idiots videotaped themselves doing it, the parents, the One mom still sided with was still like, it's the other kid that caused it. Like she still wouldn't sit. My kid? Yeah, my kid was there murdering that lady. Of course we have it on videotape, but we pretty sure it's because the other kid talked him into it. Like, well, he was still doing it. Yeah, but not my angel. It was the influence of this one. It's. Parents always say, not my kid. That's why you gotta toss their phone today. Just grab it. Give me your phone. Phone? What are you talking about, man? Give me your phone. I'm going through all of it and I guarantee you their little hands are going to be reaching at you like they're on the other side of a wall. And you know what's bad is your Kirby listens. So right now she's doing some d.

[Brady Bogan]

She said there's a co clavicular memorial at asu.

[John Holmberg]

Did he kill himself?

[Brady Bogan]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Good. Well, she knows about him, Brady. So there's your first clue that your little angel isn't oblivious to this. Not my little girl. She would never. Yeah, she's in on it, buddy. You're basically to her, sort of just a gigantic retard. Things she knows you don't know anything about. I am too. They know. Like Brewer said yesterday, that 19 year old kid he's got with him film, everything goes is this. We lean on him for everything. Like he and I even asked him, do you think everybody's stupid? He goes, not stupid, just a little slow. They think of us as retarded because to them we kind of are

[Brady Bogan]

programs,

[John Holmberg]

of course, but more so now than ever. Like our parents couldn't work the vcr. Thought they were kind of stupid technologies. Flashing. Yeah, the 12 o'. Clock. Now it's different. Now it is truly different. Like there's stuff that they just say. I don't know what low key means, but it's happening a lot.

[Brett Vesely]

Christopher DeWitt wants to add another rule to that.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brett Vesely]

And he says they get extra points if they use a ball peen Tanner temple.

[John Holmberg]

Get it?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

The temple is the key. The key win. Anyway, toss your kids phones today because they are absolutely stupid. And you have to stop saying not my kid the second you say that. Check yourself. My kid wouldn't do it. Check yourself. I watch a lot of Dateline NBC.

[Josh Blue]

A lot.

[John Holmberg]

Almost all of it. When there's a kid involved isn't a parent who just doesn't think their kid would do it. They've never once interviewed a parent and had the parents go, man, did we ever see this coming? None of them ask any parent of a drug addict. I had no idea. You know, you gotta catch them. And then. Because they're good at lying. That's what they're built for. So I get nervous when I hear Brady say that. Not Kirby. And Kirby's gonna text back, don't worry, man. We're good.

[Brady Bogan]

See?

[John Holmberg]

She even says we're fine.

[Brady Bogan]

Evidently, it was an ASU student that embarrassed the kid for doing it.

[John Holmberg]

For doing the hammer thing. Yeah, because. And he should be shamed and embarrassed. Yeah. It's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life. Are you following what's going on here? Between the lines? Kirby's following the. The hammer face.

[Brady Bogan]

I don't think it's a trend.

[John Holmberg]

All right.

[Brady Bogan]

Just one guy does it. It's a trend.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Either way. Brady.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

We're talking about it. They've known about it a lot longer than us. So it's time for you to toss her phone. And you won't do it. I know you won't. I want to see it. I don't want to see anything bad. So you're just gonna. But you. It's time for a normal parent to stop saying not my kid and toss their phone. Go through the whole. Just today. See what she does. Give me your phone. I'm gonna. I'm gonna go in the bathroom for an hour with your phone.

[Brady Bogan]

Phone.

[John Holmberg]

And every once in a while, I might scream out of the bathroom between farts. What's the password for this one? And if you don't tell me, I'm deleting the app and I'm going to take your phone away. But then precious Kirby won't have a phone, and we can't get raising canes. 10% discounts. Even two of those.

[Brady Bogan]

That's 20%. She said she's never heard of the hammer thing until you said she been telling you.

[John Holmberg]

Everybody. All right? You. She herself in the face with a hammer. You're an idiot. Now, not only does Kirby think you're. I do too. Just grab her phone and take it. See what she does. What do you think she would do if you took her phone today and said, this is mine for the next hour and you don't have anything to. You're not saying a thing.

[Brady Bogan]

She'd probably squirm a little bit.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Feel withdrawal.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. As you went through the text and read her to text.

[Brett Vesely]

She's already done a factory reset on it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, she's. She is Actually resetting, Right?

[Brett Vesely]

It's already done.

[John Holmberg]

Good, man. If you ask your kid. Let me see your phone. And they're like, sure. They've. They've reset it. They were on you. They knew the raid was coming. They knew the raid.

[Brett Vesely]

There's no apps on there anymore.

[John Holmberg]

I give this idiot credit. Toledo's never once said, not my kid. He's like, oh, Jesus.

[Brady Bogan]

My kid would never came across some stuff.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, he had black porn. Porn. Gay black porn with a thread. And that was when you realized, I can't ever say not my kid.

[Nick Toledo]

Kirby would hand over. If you say to her, I want to go through your text, she'd be like, go ahead. They don't use text.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Nick Toledo]

And when you go into their Snapchat, you have no idea what you're looking.

[Brady Bogan]

So I guess you'd hand me your phone.

[Josh Blue]

It'd be.

[Nick Toledo]

No, it's in code in Snapchat. You go in Snapchat and you're like. You try and ask them, what is this? And they just look at you.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Nick Toledo]

I'm telling you, you.

[John Holmberg]

You're an idiot. You're. You don't know the language. Right.

[Nick Toledo]

The only thing they use is Snapchat. So anything you get in there, and it's gone in 24 hours.

[Brady Bogan]

So thank you, Toledo. It's a waste of time. I don't need to check that.

[John Holmberg]

Not totally a waste of time. Rose colored glasses. That's exactly right.

[Brady Bogan]

Everything's good.

[John Holmberg]

All right, well, the other thing that

[Nick Toledo]

I found in the hidden photos folder.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, geez. What? Dick pics. Remember?

[Brady Bogan]

He was.

[Nick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no.

[Nick Toledo]

Him and his buddies had gotten kicks from. From some of the girls in. In school.

[John Holmberg]

Snooch hits.

[Nick Toledo]

I could. I threw it down because I can't look at it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you're not allowed.

[Nick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

You Epstein up on that?

[Nick Toledo]

I told him, I said, you got to delete that. Your mom pays for that phone. She's.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. He's got underage snooch shots on his phone. Had when he was back on. On his phone.

[Nick Toledo]

Yeah. And then his buddy Landon was sending dick pics to everybody.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, just saying.

[Brady Bogan]

Kid don't know anything, Right?

[John Holmberg]

That's what we're talking about. Don't care.

[Nick Toledo]

She 18 yet?

[Brady Bogan]

Nope.

[John Holmberg]

No, man.

[Nick Toledo]

Oh, July, right?

[Brady Bogan]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Crash the fall, Kirby.

[Brett Vesely]

Kirby's hammer challenge is how much weed she can hammer before class,

[John Holmberg]

Man. I turned this hammer into a bong, man. Not my angel. Are you on fire, Kirby? No, man. It's just a cold out.

[Brady Bogan]

Allergies flared up. Her eyes Are red. Yeah, man.

[Josh Blue]

It's rough, man.

[John Holmberg]

The grapefruit trees, man.

[Nick Toledo]

Tossing the phone is a great idea, but you need a kid like Kyle yesterday, and you have to have Kyle

[John Holmberg]

go, hey, hire a. I don't know

[Brady Bogan]

if he's left town already. Have to.

[John Holmberg]

Look, you have to hire a little digital specialist.

[Brady Bogan]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

To come in and go, this is Kyle. He's 18. And we're gonna go through your phone today. And then she'll watch her go, oh, no, my retarded dad got smartphone for a minute. She thinks you're retarded. I mean, a lot of people do.

[Nick Toledo]

Kyle thought we were retarded.

[John Holmberg]

He actually apologized to Brady. Yeah. I'm so sorry you're going through this. What are you talking about? Well, obviously had that shaky car ride to the hospital. And you got 21, right? What are we looking at? What's happening? Yeah, she thinks you're retarded. Like, she would put you in an institution. If it was, like, up to her, she'd be like, hey, you can't make it through life because if you're trying to live her way, you don't know anything.

[Nick Toledo]

And on top of that, I proved

[John Holmberg]

that we were with.

[Nick Toledo]

With Kyle because I kept texting him. Thanks, Tyler.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he said, by the way, I

[Brady Bogan]

mean, it's my man.

[John Holmberg]

It's Kyle. Yep. Toss the phones. I got a cop friend that said it's never gone, and I know how to find it. Give me the phone, and I'll show Brady everything on that hard drive. Oh, we get some cop friends in there. You don't want to know. I mean, you imagine. Imagine the shattering of Brady's one good kidney.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, my God.

[John Holmberg]

If he opened up that I don't want to know and why and saw just her only fans page. You didn't know she had. Oh, my. Some dads are going to have to deal with that.

[Brady Bogan]

I got some stats on that.

[John Holmberg]

On only fans that parents don't know. Yeah. Oh, if I was a girl, I didn't only fans. If I was a pretty woman, I would be that currency that I'm carrying around. I'm stockpiling cash to my 20s. That's all I'm doing. It's genius. Toss their phones today. Says, I've heard of this clay guy. He does bone smashing things for beauty. I think it's dumb beyond belief, but natural selection will take its course. He also had a scandal for running over a dude with his cyber truck. Yeah, see, I don't know anything about it, and I don't care to know because. Because it's not entertainment. It's stupidity. Which I guess was the theme of this show for you. Says, my daughter turned 18 in January. Swag level went up. Rich is spot on about their apps and their language. It's impossible. Yep. And it's because you weren't paying attention to them early on. You're trying to be their friend and say the same. Hey, I'm low key like you. Oh, yeah, she's losing. She's using the same language as us. Great. Thanks, Mom. Hey, check my Insta. I just took a picture of me with your daddy over at the Buck and Rider. That's great. That's how you use it. Good job. I don't even pretend. I don't want to pretend to have an Instagram page to relate to them. I can't.

[Brady Bogan]

I just think of Harrison Ford and shrinking. She's raw dogging me again.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you say stuff like you're trying to be in on it, and they look at you like, oh, God, we've got him. He's trying to be one of us. Be authentic and just go. You might be the dumbest mother I've ever met. I don't know what you're about.

[Josh Blue]

Talking.

[John Holmberg]

Talking about, call me bro one more time. I'm your dad. Call me bruh one more time. One day, Kirby's just gonna come home with a bunch of black guys, and they're gonna go in the room, and Brady's just gonna have to say, hey, you guys want to keep it down in there?

[Brady Bogan]

Listen to your coach.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Kirby must be coaching the Gilbert Christian basketball squad. That kid looks like he's about 33. Appreciate you viewing this house. A very nice, very nice home you have here. Thanks, D. Lamont. Anyway, go through your kids post. Not if you're Brady or not if you don't want to know. I trust my angel. Worst words I've ever heard a parent say. I just. Most normal people just roll their eyes. Okay. And my. My friend. Oh, our kids don't drink. Okay? And every time I'd go out with these nephews and nieces of mine, they're guzzling. They're. They're pros. Your parents think you don't drink. Yeah, I know. How'd you do that? Yeah, they're retarded, but they're not. This is for Brady Said Snapchat is the least of your worries. Discord is the one you got to worry about. My daughter got caught up a few years ago in Discord Cord. The FBI ended up at our House. That would be just because you weren't paying attention to my complete surprise. I can tell you the whole story if you want.

[Josh Blue]

I don't want to know.

[John Holmberg]

You make me an accomplice, David. I'm not interested in your FBI showing up stories. Usually I kind of walk away from that. Yeah, I'm. I'm just kind of into my own thing. I can relate to you. I'm a nice person. We'll have fun. I'll make you laugh. You'll goof around. We'll have a good time. Start getting into your Instagram and your Snapchat and stuff. I get it. I get the basics. I understand. But I'm not going to go diving into that stuff. I'm not going to play pretend I get you. I'm not going to put pants on that you like. Mom, we're dressed the same. Me and my daughter, best friends. I was on her insta the other day. She's just. You are making yourself. You might as well just be going, and I like bananas and I like jelly bellies. And you're. That's all they hear my dance.

[Brady Bogan]

My dad.

[John Holmberg]

Best friends with my daughter. They're just like, daughter snout it.

[Brady Bogan]

Unless it's like Haley and the. The AI Mom. Daughter.

[John Holmberg]

Now, now you're just deflecting Brady. Now you're going to a place that's going to attract Brett and I back to the conference. Let's stay real here. Don't go to those hot AI Daughter moms that start making out that aren't even real. Toss your kids phones. Today it's another little PSA that we do every once in a while when we realize, oh, hammer smashing is a thing. They're hitting themselves in the face with that. This is where the parents who don't get it say things like, oh, I'm not my angel. And the next thing you know, they. They're. They're in a box with a bruise on their head. And you're sitting there trying to pay the deductible at the hospital going, what were you doing again? I smashed myself in the face with a hammer because clavicle did it. Oh God. I've got a. I gave birth to a retard, now I gotta raise it. Clavicle said it makes you beautiful if you smash yourself in the face. You literally did. You didn't do the. And they act like you're. But they're in the hospital bed with hammer wounds, self inflicted. Telling you, you're the dumb one. Go through their phones.

[Brady Bogan]

Not the claw part.

[John Holmberg]

Go through the phones. Morons. What do you got on the big board of musical treatment there, Bert?

[Brady Bogan]

Just a.

[John Holmberg]

Huh?

[Brett Vesely]

All right, just a call back here, two. We were talking about the. The baby hippo.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Page here. Yeah, well, they have named it. It's Jelly Bean, but KTAR posted it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well,

[Brett Vesely]

Andy decided to say.

[John Holmberg]

Actually, the name is now there's a guy from. Who has infiltrated the ktar. There it is. And it says, actually, the name is now Rachel Catherine, Pygmy, as decreed by Holmberg's morning sickness. 98 KUPD. That's right. It is now on a news site. So we can start putting it out there saying, as heard on trusted news network. 92.3 KTAR. Madonna's losing it. Oh, poor Sharp. That's exactly. Oh, Sharp's trying to get that deleted so fast. Oh, can't mention another station. Listen to it. Oh, that's gold right there. Good job.

[Brady Bogan]

I heard back from Christy. She says, lol. I don't get it. Who is Rachel?

[John Holmberg]

Catherine, it's the new pygmy hippo, and that's all you need to know. I just tell her, christy, it's a big fat listener who drives me nuts and another big fat listener who tried to drive me nuts again. And we're ruining their lives in an attempt to get them to jump off our planet. It would be nice. And probably, if they jumped off our planet, the two of them together, we would then have 10 planets in the system, because those two hand planets would just go into orbit and we would be like, look at the size of them. That's exactly what would happen. So just tell her it's a big fat listener that I'm attacking that I would very much like to name a hippo after if I could possibly do that at one point or another.

[Brett Vesely]

All right. Wake Up Song. And we do have a sponsor for it now.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, it's. That's right.

[Brett Vesely]

I know. I want to make a copy of that so I can read it tomorrow.

[John Holmberg]

Would you like to read it this time?

[Brett Vesely]

No, go ahead.

[John Holmberg]

I think you should.

[Brett Vesely]

Sure, why not?

[John Holmberg]

It's brought to you by Modern Resolution Windows and Doors. Brett, that's the way. Okay, yeah. Now you got John Holmberg.

[Brett Vesely]

And get an extra 500 off your total contract price.

[John Holmberg]

That's right.

[Brett Vesely]

Family run, locally owned financing and payment plans are available. Visit modernresolution.com for more info today.

[John Holmberg]

There it is.

[Brett Vesely]

And on the list. Kill Switch. Engage Van Halen, Drop Dead Legs for Rachel, Slayer, Raining Blood, Metallica, Escape for the Everything going on Crowbar, Pantera, Unbroken for Rachel's Couch Cushions. Ha Breed, ZZ Top Legs Queen Fat Bottom Girls for Rachel Primus. Rachel's Big Brown.

[John Holmberg]

Let's not just throw Catherine two. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Ice Nine Kills and System of a Down. Chicken and Stew. That's the Pizza Pizza Pie song.

[John Holmberg]

We gotta do it that.

[Brett Vesely]

You want that one.

[John Holmberg]

It's so annoying, but.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, it is.

[John Holmberg]

And Chicken and Stew is like, I don't even know how they recorded this and then mastered it. I don't know how they talked a producer into going, waste your time on this. And then it turned out to be like, one of the more fun songs.

[Brett Vesely]

And the label going, yeah, that's a good idea. That's a good idea.

[John Holmberg]

Pizza, Pizza, Pizza Pie. Yeah. If you haven't heard this yet, it's going to drive you nuts, but it's also gonna be something you like. It's annoying, but it's good. Oh, Brady, I worry for you. At least Ronnie's over there going through her phone.

[Brady Bogan]

Right? I appreciate that.

[John Holmberg]

Ronnie. Ronnie goes through her phone. Ronnie makes sure. As long as somebody's being the adult, not the raising canes. Pal, I don't want to talk bad. Let's just go to Raisin Canes. That'll heal. Just put the hammer down.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll fix it when I hit her with a hammer today.

[John Holmberg]

That's right. I'm sure that's something.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

This one said my. My sister became lost in all of her life due to discord. Her friends convinced her she had mental and physical problems and it supported her toxic traits. She's an Alphabet mess now. I don't even know that disc. I didn't know Discord was that effective to. I just. Look, I'm. I'm stronger than that. That a website's not going to do that to me. I would hope.

[Brett Vesely]

I have two adopted kids. I don't know why I know these two low IQ morons would try the hammer challenge.

[John Holmberg]

You adopted a couple? Sorry, Tony. He's thinking they're adopted. He doesn't want to admit that he made them. Yeah, I wouldn't either. Toss your kids phones today. Do it. They said, here's three things I learned from my angel that I used to say would never do. Do. It took my car out a few times and did donuts without me knowing. Stupid motorist drove his truck through the wash with a carload of people in it. Thinking that was a fun thing to put. They stopped, tried to rescue two other idiots who were stuck in the middle of the car wash. And the third thing is, when going on to his Snapchat, I found some things that led me to affectionately rename it Snatch Chat. That's what they'd use it for. Think of you, Brett, what would you use Snapchat for when you were a

[Brady Bogan]

kid if you had it back in the day?

[Brett Vesely]

Exactly.

[Brady Bogan]

Hook it up.

[John Holmberg]

Boobs and bush, bro.

[Brett Vesely]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

And you'd be getting just like Toledo's kid and be showing it to each other. Absolutely joking.

[Brady Bogan]

Do you think you guys would be hammering yourself in the head?

[John Holmberg]

No, no, I think I'm. I was above that.

[Brett Vesely]

No, I think Kurt Vesl may do that for me.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Just, you know, and there's, there's a reason why I had a dad who'd be like, what are you doing?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, here, give me that.

[John Holmberg]

I'll help you. I'll hit you with. If you want to get hit in the face with a hammer. I'm your.

[Brett Vesely]

I'm your huckleberry Philip said, I'm listening to you guys While driving my 13 year old son to school. He said, it's even worse because they're hitting their jaw to have a chiseled jaw.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. They're saying that it's a beautification thing. So you got a kid that's worried about and they're all like, insecure about the way they look because. Instagram that. That too.

[Brett Vesely]

And Donovan wants to teach Brady a term used in the army. Trust. But verif.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, yes. Great phrase. Guy says, I'm just getting in the car. What's the 7 o' clock word? 7 o' clock word is Kirk. Kirk is the word for 7am you can get on that thing. You guys are crushing this Metallica thing. The numbers are awesome. So we thank you guys for participating. And again, maybe some of them are drummed up dummy numbers because I told you to give everybody, you know a chance to download the app and help you out. So get a team of people in on this thing, whether they listen or not. I don't care. It boosts our numbers and that's all that really matters around here. And we don't.

[Josh Blue]

We don't care.

[John Holmberg]

We love it when the Bobs are like, yeah, it's done a great promotion. They don't care. Like, we can dick around with this all we want. Get everybody involved and then that increases your odds. So good luck. Send you to Vegas. Seat Metallica in sphere.

[Brett Vesely]

They love our podcast.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, our podcast is doing great. All right, let's do that. Pizza, Pizza pie song. The chicken and stew.

[Brett Vesely]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

Here you go. It's. It's a weird one. Have fun. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station. Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from AMCO. Wayne, it's tax time. You filed, and your refunds burn in a hole in your pocket. That's right, Larry. Before you book a trip or buy something shiny, please remember your car. Tax time's the best time to take care of all the car repairs you've been putting off. Sure, because nothing kills a tax refund buzz faster than a surprise car breakdown. I'll say. If your car's been acting up, now's the time to handle it. Should we wait for our refund before getting repairs? No way. Amco payment plans let you get repairs now and pay when you get your check. Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco. Double A, MCO transmissions and a who lot more. The Renaissance Festival is back. Weekends now through March 29th. Be ready to have a great time. Amazing adventure awaits the entire family. New shows, shopping, jousting, nights, non stop feasting. Leave your cares behind. Happiness reigns at the Renaissance Festival. It's fun and affordable. Visit now through March 29th. Discount tickets available at bashes and Food city or online at arizona.renfestinfo.com Presented by Delta Airlines, Bashes, Food City, Pepsi, Budweiser, and Guinness.

[Ron Capps]

You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[John Holmberg]

What the hell is wrong with you? The more I'm reading about it, Brett, you are discord. Brett just tried to convince Brady to get a big arch. Like that's the last thing this man needs right now. He's what he's got. He's got a little kidney. And you're trying to get the news

[Brett Vesely]

to everybody on how good it is.

[John Holmberg]

Is the worst part is I watched him light up when you said you had that big archet. And Brady goes Tuesday like it was. There wasn't a beat in between hearing you say the big arch at McDonald's and Tuesday, 1050 calories for the burger.

[Brett Vesely]

Something like that. Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

1047.

[John Holmberg]

All right, suddenly he's calories.

[Brady Bogan]

Don't add.

[John Holmberg]

Don't add calories on me. Well, you're gonna have fries. Come on.

[Brett Vesely]

You can't go there and not have fries.

[Josh Blue]

You.

[John Holmberg]

You are the discord. And you've talked him into needing a big arch. What he needs is a big head of lettuce. You're not eating the arch. Are. You're not going to go get the arch.

[Brady Bogan]

I've had McDonald's one time since.

[John Holmberg]

Since the surgery. All right. Okay. Making sure. Got an email from a guy and he's absolutely right. He basically said, hey, I just saw some pictures of the pygmy hippo and I just don't think we should do that to rap Rachel or Catherine. That pygmy is too cute to stamp. It's probably true. It's not fair to do. The pygmy is like, yeah, don't name it Rachel, Catherine, Pygmy. It would be way too cute. Named after those two insufferable C words. I'm also pretty sure there's no way it would be able to grow to the size to adequately, adequately represent the two of them. And that's very true. It's a. It's a pig.

[Brady Bogan]

Right. Only the male would be big enough.

[Nick Toledo]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

And even then, we're talking about 480. Rachel and Catherine here. 480 is nothing. We're just barely tipping the scale. Us again. Like Rico Blaze said yesterday, when Rachel gets on the scale, it doesn't give a number. Just says, call Rico. You made it. You made it past the threshold. It's eight o', clock, everybody. And that means it's time for another word. Hold on.

[Brady Bogan]

Kirk ended.

[John Holmberg]

Kirk is over. Justice is now the word we're looking for. Justice is the 8 o' clock word for the Metallica concert. And oh my, is that thing going gangbusters. You guys are crushing this thing. Every hour up until 9pm and then you got one hour after that to get that word. And we go till 10. You can try to disappear to the sphere with our friends Metallica getting this awesome deal that only we're getting. 25 years of this show has gotten us a little access with the folks at Metallica and I don't know who else is doing this across the country, but it is few and far between and they got it to. To us. So every hour we give you a word and you got a chance to go there. Metallica, two shows. Shows. Two separate shows. One on October 1st, one on October 3rd. You get tickets to both of those. This is thousands of dollars in tickets. Plus you get to stay in a hotel. We put you in. Haven't. I don't know which one that's going to be, but they're. They're going to line you up in a nice. You'll have a bed, you have a nice place. It's not going to be Circus.

[Brett Vesely]

Circus.

[Nick Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You're not. Well, it might be Circus. Circus. But I'm not going to say it isn't just in case it is. But it'll be a nice place. There'll be a roof and walls and people and like, bathrooms inside. And then we're gonna give it 200 bucks in fuel to get you there. So it works out great. The word for eight o'. Clock justice. So hop on that right away. Dale is not coming in today at 9, but that's okay because Ron Capps is back.

[Brett Vesely]

Nice.

[John Holmberg]

The. The drags are here and Ron Capps is coming in doing some test runs. And we're gonna have caps come in. His annual visit. Love, Ron. As nhr RA is rolling back into the city on a very hot weekend. I know this might be the hottest it's ever been when they raced. So we'll.

[Josh Blue]

We'll.

[John Holmberg]

We'll definitely see some.

[Brady Bogan]

I think it. I think that's a good temperature.

[John Holmberg]

90 is like fast. Yeah, I remember that one year was in the high 80s. He goes, this is. We're gonna break some records. And that is if you. Again, it's the eargasm you have never had in your life. If you'd like to do this thing. It is. I don't know how my eyes get gonna do. If I go. This bubble in my eye might not be able to handle the sound. I'm gonna call the doctor and ask.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm missing this year.

[John Holmberg]

Where are you going? Oh, yeah, you're leaving for a wedding. Yeah, about that.

[Brett Vesely]

The drags aren't till next month, though.

[John Holmberg]

I know. He's doing some testing though. Oh, that's true.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I think I'm putting this next month.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, good.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. He's just doing the testing. I forgot. I'm sitting there adding this item. Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Because I gotta go out there on next month Saturday, so.

[John Holmberg]

All right. So he's just gonna come in here after he. But you can hear him if you're up there at Wild Horse Pass. You'll be able to hear him racing and goofing. Or even further than that. You're now Tuke. So we'll talk to Ron this morning and Josh Blue's gonna join us a little while as well. Right now it's time for Brady to give you all the news while you're clicking the word justice into the 8 o' clock box on our app and our website. And it's brought to you by our friends at all pro shade allprochade.com 20 years of doing this job has made them better. Each and every day. They get a Little bit better than they were yesterday because they've been at it for a long time. And that's what happens, happens when you keep going. These guys are the best in the business. Making shade at your house and making it look like it's supposed to be part of your house, not just something that's attached to it. It's a room for your outdoor living, and you need it right now. 90 degrees. I can drop those temperatures about 15 degree. We're in February and it's 90. Get it down to 75 and enjoy that patio space you've been dodging because of that dreaded sunshine. Put some shade on your life and make it cozy. Comfy. They can put a TV back there and not have any glare. They'll fix that too. All prochet.com Brady reported.

[Brady Bogan]

Good Thursday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.

[John Holmberg]

Hi.

[Brady Bogan]

Happy National Chili Day. And this is big Day. National Toast Day.

[Brett Vesely]

First Toledo.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he's here. By the way, what you're doing with McDonald's is pointed out. It's actually a word for it. You haven't had it since. But once since the surgery. You're mcjeffing. You're kind of in between McDonald's meals. You're walking to the next run.

[Brady Bogan]

Tuesday might change. Just remember I was. I was talking about going for the Shamrock Shake.

[John Holmberg]

That's right.

[Brady Bogan]

And I did. I did go in there, but the machine was broken.

[John Holmberg]

It's never on. Sorry. The shamrock machine is broken? Yeah. We cannot possibly house the needs that you will require.

[Brady Bogan]

A couple of basis fun facts.

[John Holmberg]

Did you go in for a shamrock Shake?

[Brady Bogan]

I did.

[John Holmberg]

You park and get out at McDonald's?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Why? I can't remember why you wanted those fresh smells.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm just gonna go in.

[John Holmberg]

So my guess is you didn't leave

[Brady Bogan]

with nothing and take in the smells.

[John Holmberg]

No, no. You went in for the shamrock shape, but you're like. Well, went in Rome.

[Nick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

You know why? Yeah, I'm sure you did. And that was your. But wait a minute. That was your one McDonald's. Okay.

[Nick Toledo]

So you can have a conversation with the camera. Help.

[John Holmberg]

Got any cheese? Of course we have cheese. Got some bread? Yeah, we got bread, butter.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Make me a grilled cheese sandwich.

[Brett Vesely]

Do you have anybody even at the counter anymore? Don't they have those and stuff?

[Brady Bogan]

They got both.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, okay.

[John Holmberg]

I would choose the people option.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, no, I did the screen.

[John Holmberg]

Did you?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. So you went in to not interact.

[Brady Bogan]

I decided I'll. I'll spend a little time there.

[John Holmberg]

Why?

[Brady Bogan]

I had like 15 minutes.

[John Holmberg]

It's not about time. The drive thru takes the same amount of time.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, I wasn't gonna. I. I didn't want to eat in my car. You didn't want to.

[John Holmberg]

Wait a minute. In your car? Yeah. You weren't gonna eat?

[Brady Bogan]

It was kind of spontaneous. I said, oh, could I. Could I eat before I go into my. In my meeting?

[John Holmberg]

What was the meeting for?

[Brady Bogan]

It's probably going to the doctor.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, it's the best thing to do is load up on some shamrock shakes before an exam. That's weird. I don't think anybody even went in anymore. Just hobos when it's hot. And evidently.

[Wayne]

Brady.

[Brady Bogan]

I saw. I saw. They had a ball pit, and I'm like, I gotta.

[John Holmberg]

You gotta dive into that. I'm with you on that.

[Brady Bogan]

An all female spacewalk was planned in 2019, but it had to be canceled because NASA did not have two spacesuits to fit two women. So instead they sent one woman and one man.

[John Holmberg]

Wait a minute. There was a fat one.

[Brady Bogan]

What are we talking about? No, the. They didn't have one suit.

[John Holmberg]

We're not gonna get.

[Brady Bogan]

You only had one lady suit.

[John Holmberg]

They couldn't manufacture a second.

[Brady Bogan]

I guess not.

[John Holmberg]

Paul Hugo Boss. He made a whole army's worth of suits once. They just didn't want him up there. That is not about. Well, no, not at all. Last night on the news, I realized that I am. I am a misogynist. Like those women that scream at me that I'm. You're a misogynist? No, not. I'm just a realist. And there's some of that. That kind of balanced. Last night, the news said a car has crashed into a house in central Phoenix. I'm like, oh, geez, what happened? The woman driving. And I'm like. And the story ended like two words later. Like, they didn't even dive in. Like, oh. And I was like, yeah, that makes sense. She just goofed. It wasn't like running from the law or some sort of weird. She just goofed and ran into a house.

[Brady Bogan]

Only one NFL team has a plant for a logo

[John Holmberg]

for a logo or

[Brady Bogan]

mascot for a logo.

[Josh Blue]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, the fleur de lis, the flower, stylized lily. Yeah. Great band.

[Brady Bogan]

Women didn't start shaving their armpits until the mid-1910s.

[John Holmberg]

Isn't that amazing what our great grandparents went through? They fought a civil war. I wouldn't have fought for anything if I was alive back then. I know. Don't care. I want to be dead. This hairy laying on me, smelling there's no feminine hygiene. She's got a sock stuffed in there every 28 days.

[Brett Vesely]

Too far.

[John Holmberg]

She's got some sort of like she has to cut the corner of the potato sack out and patch that thing up every 28 days. Oh, she probably just had like a wooden cup or she went over to that water water mill and just squatted.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh yeah, the water milk.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know what they're doing. Should have washed you to go down and do that weird scrub the clothes on the rock. You know, she's squatting over water and just splashing it on there. It's like. Sorry about this at that time, Troy.

[Brett Vesely]

Michael might have been right.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Troy. Well think. Well think about that. It wasn't toilet paper either. We didn't invent anything good until like 19.

[Brett Vesely]

They didn't have it either. So they had a. Oh, it's a twofer.

[John Holmberg]

And all that heroin picture squatting over there at that. At the Olson water mill. Sorry, Mr. Olsen. That time of the month.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

She's squatting out of tomato juice. Right in our water again, love. Isabel, go outside and push that lady into the drink. She can't go putting a tomato sauce. And our drinking water, by the way, it's time for a bath. And if you know what that meant at the time. You ran one bath and everybody got in. And that was after hard day's work at the water mill, you know, netting out all that tomato sauce so the family could drink. You think about it. They didn't shave till 1910 and that's

[Brady Bogan]

where they named it V8 Brady.

[John Holmberg]

They didn't. Yeah, because you could use it. They didn't shave till 1910. But that wasn't all of them.

[Brady Bogan]

The pits.

[John Holmberg]

Right. Only. Yeah, that wasn't all of them. That didn't catch on probably till the fancy.

[Brady Bogan]

That was fancy folks.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, fancy lasses could get rid of some armpit hair in the tension everyday lady. 50s and 60s probably is when they first end deodorant. That wasn't a thing. They rubbed like rocks on their armpits. Oh, that's how I know your God.

[Brady Bogan]

You probably didn't do it until you're old enough.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

So you're going through high school every morning.

[John Holmberg]

I don't care how religious you are. Every morning you admit your God's kind of a jerk because you cover up everything he scratches. Screwed up deodorant perfume. We're a. We're a flawed mess. We stink. He made a smell. He could have made us to where we sweat. And it Was nice either. Made it so we didn't sweat.

[Brady Bogan]

You have to be on the same page on that. Wear deodorant so then you don't smell.

[John Holmberg]

He could have put us on a planet that we didn't suffer from the sun. He could have put us on a place where like Jesus Christ. It's a little warm, don't you think? Our bodies don't like it. Once it's past 85, start gushing water out of our and stinks. Prior to 1930, everybody stunk. There was no oral sex worth it unless she was down at that Olsen mill dipping it down into that water and then you had to get right on.

[Brady Bogan]

Must have been worth it even back then because I mean you go to a place like Pompeii, oh yeah, they

[John Holmberg]

had pictures, but again they had a lake. And here's the other thing. You had to get it like the 5 second rule with food. Now the second she got that thing out of the Olson water mill, you had to start eating right then. Well, it's drip dry. Don't touch it. Oh, it was horrible. Oh, I got away with it. And then that smell started to come back. That's a fact. You see dudes running of out and tearing their hats and their suspendees off. Running out there, watching her squatting over there. I'm get her. I'm gonna get her.

[Brady Bogan]

I got her.

[John Holmberg]

I got a clean one, boys.

[Brady Bogan]

That's why so many teeth were missing.

[John Holmberg]

It's just rotten them out because they're bashing into her pelvic bone. I know another thing, it didn't have dentistry. Really? They had it, but it wasn't anywhere. It was just a dude with pliers. What you got? This hurts. Ow.

[Brady Bogan]

A while back, only fans said the average creator made around 1300 bucks per year. But according to a new survey from about the adult industry, a research firm said the average Creator earns about 58,700 a year from adult work or about 5k per month. The most common range is 10k to 40k a year. Year at 19% then you have another 20% that'll take in more than 100k a year.

[John Holmberg]

A lot of numbers getting thrown around.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Say only fans would pull in 100,000. Is that what you're saying? Prostitutes?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. 35% of creators said they're. They were entirely dependent on their adult world work for their survival. While 34 have other jobs too.

[John Holmberg]

Look, if you're pretty, there ain't no harm in that. You're already doing it for free on like Instagram and all the other stuff.

[Nick Toledo]

We've seen the other side too. If you're not so pretty. If you're Rachel, do it. Also, there's a market there.

[John Holmberg]

There's a bunch of weirdos with crossed eyes that will look at you.

[Nick Toledo]

Get your confidence back. Rachel, do that.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. Don't read the comments. Don't read.

[Nick Toledo]

Turn those off.

[John Holmberg]

Turn the comments off.

[Brady Bogan]

Some dude in Northern California crashes SUV on Tuesday while doing whippets and kept doing whippets while waiting to be rescued.

[Brett Vesely]

People still do that.

[John Holmberg]

I never got it.

[Brady Bogan]

They didn't release his name, but they know he's 47 years old. The crash happened around 6am Tuesday morning in the town of Sebastopol. Sebastopol.

[John Holmberg]

Close enough.

[Brady Bogan]

It's in the Wine county country.

[John Holmberg]

Sure does. Everybody loves the Toyota Tacoma. This is Larry McFeely and even our very own Trip Reeb just picked up a new Toyota Tacoma for his towing needs. Of course, he loves the fact that it provides over 450 foot pounds of torque, but you should have heard him raving about the giant 14 inch touchscreen and his favorite, the removable JBL Bluetooth speaker you can pull right off of the dash to blast the 98k upd app. He's a Tacoma lover now, but how could he not be?

[Nick Toledo]

It's time for you to take a

[John Holmberg]

look at the new Toyota Tacoma. Visit your Valley Toyota dealers or valleytoyotadeealers.com Toyota let's go places. It's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness for lifechangerloan.com I got a little note from Shane O', Grady, the head cheese over at Life Changer Loan. He said, this week three wonderful listeners all made the move to Life Change your loan and each of them will be paying off their homes in under four years. That's right. And that's normal too. So many people try to refinance. Go to lifechangerloan.com and see if it's right for you. Maybe you like paying debt off for 30 years and spending $200,000 extra in interest. I. I don't. I know a better way. And it's not magic. It's just math. Lifechangerloan.com Holmberg's morning sickness

[Brady Bogan]

yeah, they're still doing Whip it. So cops say he was driving a Land Rover through the town at an unsafe speed when he lost control, hit a curb, plowed through a bank sign, hit several small trees, went through a parking lot and slammed into a brick wall.

[John Holmberg]

He Just kept going, going.

[Brady Bogan]

His car was totaled. He was trapped inside, so he just kept doing whippets until the cops yanked him.

[John Holmberg]

You know, that's a good news story about a guy who hit a building last night. It was Jared Dillingham on Channel three going, car hit a house down in Phoenix. It was a woman. And then the story was over. It didn't say she was on whippets or bashing it.

[Brett Vesely]

He didn't want to stretch it out too much.

[John Holmberg]

We know she didn't drive through a whole vineyard and, like, knock down trees and mailboxes and stuff. She was just a woman. Hit a house downtown. Anyway, that's not really news.

[Brady Bogan]

So here's a hypothetical poll that someone did on social media. Pretty good. The question was, you can get $10 million right now, but your lifespan will decrease by 10 years.

[John Holmberg]

I'll take it.

[Brady Bogan]

You take the offer.

[John Holmberg]

How much? I want to get old.

[Brady Bogan]

10,000. 10 million.

[Nick Toledo]

Oh, 10 million.

[Brady Bogan]

Yes, absolutely. Decrease by 10 years. Years. 63% of the people said yes.

[John Holmberg]

In a heart. Here's the reason why the other ones are lying. I'm 53.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, exactly.

[John Holmberg]

10 years off. My life is fine. That means I can quit today. And I'm healthy enough to enjoy that money as retirement rather than struggle or fight to retire.

[Brady Bogan]

So, couple of comments. You know, guys like, win, win. Another guy said, make it a decrease of 30 years, and I'll still think,

[John Holmberg]

depending on your age. Hope to Christ I don't have 30 years left.

[Brady Bogan]

Left, right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I'll go to, like, 66, 67. But I've been looking at Trip getting old ain't good.

[Nick Toledo]

I told my.

[John Holmberg]

I just. He just walks like he wants out.

[Nick Toledo]

When I met my actual aunt, my. My dad's sister, I asked her, I'm like, hey. I go, what's the deal with the health of the men in this family? I go, I don't know anything. You know, what am I. What am I looking at? And she goes, well, I don't want to disappoint you or anything.

[John Holmberg]

I have a. I have a tape of you, actually. Yeah, exactly.

[Brady Bogan]

Where are the men in this country?

[John Holmberg]

Where are the men in this world? What the hell? If we. Sorry. The tape of him asking his aunt. So I asked.

[Nick Toledo]

I asked her, how long do they live? She goes, well, I don't want to disappoint you, but all the men in this family have lived well into their 90s. I do not want to live well into my 90s. So I'll take. I'll take checking out at 80, I'm

[John Holmberg]

starting to look at my. My dad and his sisters. My dad's super duper healthy at 78. Knock them when he's 78. And like his. His one sister, like 91 1, is

[Brady Bogan]

that she's doing great.

[John Holmberg]

C word Jones. No, no, no, no. Aunt Joan. It was misspelled. I just didn't realize it was a one letter difference. Yes, it became C word Joan, but that was a complete accident on text. I didn't realize that was happening. I didn't realize Ant and the C word were one letter apart. They're totally. They're totally different pronunciations. But she's in her 80s, she's doing great. She had all sorts of health problems, so I'm hoping it skips a generation because my dad's dad got real sick at like his late 60s. And then he lived to be like 74, but it was like 68, 69. He got. He got the bad boy.

[Nick Toledo]

So it's just your dad and the two sisters?

[John Holmberg]

Two sisters. And then my grandma was till 80 something, but she didn't. Last couple years were just her wandering around looking at clouds.

[Nick Toledo]

Alvar have brothers?

[John Holmberg]

You know, I don't know. I think so. A lot of people named Pear and Ingvar, right? The names of the furniture. Yeah. If. Yeah, if I go through ikea, I'm like, that was my uncle's name. That's my great uncle's name. A lot of, um, lots. And I didn't. We didn't pay attention.

[Brady Bogan]

I got a quick Wild America.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Is it about the pygmy hippo?

[Brady Bogan]

Hello, my friends. I'm Brady Bogan and this is your Wild America. We can do that real quick. The pygmy hippo. Brett mentioned it.

[John Holmberg]

Yep.

[Brady Bogan]

Name's Jelly Bean. Well, no, we're trying to go for Rachel Catherine.

[John Holmberg]

Rachel Catherine Ryan.

[Nick Toledo]

We're going to.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, we call it Rachel Catherine Jelly beans Bean. Is jelly beans already taken? It's too urban.

[Brady Bogan]

We got a convicted felon from Watts who's been sentenced to 45 days in jail and 12 months of probation for posting a video of himself feeding a Cooper's hawk a buzzball.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know what a buzzball is.

[Brady Bogan]

That's one of those little ball drinks that are pre mixed cocktails.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Oh, no, I'm not a hillbilly. I don't have.

[Brady Bogan]

It is a sugar bomb.

[John Holmberg]

I don't have those. I'm not a redneck.

[Brady Bogan]

They have.

[Nick Toledo]

They have the giant one that looks like the old Coors light ball keg. You remember those?

[Brett Vesely]

Well, they have those two giant ones.

[Brady Bogan]

A two gallon one or something like that.

[John Holmberg]

Or I. As far as I go, Caesar, I've got high noon. That's as far as I'll go. As far as that.

[Brady Bogan]

But Caesar Diaz was the guy feeding the Cooper's hockey. Found it. It was injured. It was in this park and posted. Hanging out with the homie and says Hawk loves him some buzz buck ball.

[John Holmberg]

Is the hawk live?

[Brady Bogan]

It's alive. And he's drinking the buzz ball.

[John Holmberg]

But is the hawk doing better now?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, because then it worked. He released it by the time the. The wildlife officials showed up. Like I said, he got 45 days in jail and 12 months probation.

[Brett Vesely]

Where was he?

[Brady Bogan]

At some park. And Watts.

[John Holmberg]

What is that?

[Brett Vesely]

You know, this is playing in the background too.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. Didn't even cat. What up, Hawk? You doing player? Yeah, Hawk's looking at him, just kind of bobbing his head. My wing hurts. Yeah, you need a little sip out. Let's pour one out for your Hawk homies. Let's take your ass to the stove. That hawk drinking on my buzz. No barking from the dog. How's this happening outside? How's this happening outside of the park? Your house is on fire. Anyway, was Watts. They're not. There's not. It's not on a loop. Yeah, it is. No, it isn't. Well, they had smoke detectors outside 311 on a loop at Brady's neighborhood.

[Brady Bogan]

They have it on the street lights. They got speakers now in my neighborhood.

[John Holmberg]

Are y' all playing basketball?

[Brady Bogan]

We must be in walk.

[John Holmberg]

You guys hear that? You guys hear that? Oh, boy. Somebody messed around. Got a triple double. And I heard it. We should probably turn around. What are the lights of the Goodyear Blimpson? Nice cubes of pimp. We're in a bad neighborhood. The blimp. The blimp is even acquiescing. If you've ever said that phrase in your life, you're in a bad. The blimp is acquiescing. It's time to turn around. It's adapting. Jesus Christ. The blimps trying to please him.

[Brady Bogan]

Got a Florida man that got arrested after deputies found him at a Chinese restaurant with a shovel shot shouting, I had to destroy that restaurant. All Chinese restaurants are going to release a new strain of COVID on July 6th.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he knows the day. Yeah, if they've got. Oh, they're not ready yet. It's like the big arch.

[Brady Bogan]

So Richard Jarvis was trying to destroy the restaurant with a shovel.

[John Holmberg]

Probably should have Picked a better weapon. Don Quixote. But still, all of them. All the Chinese restaurants, he was just.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, yeah, and he started with this one. Pearls. Chinese Restaurant. Restaurant.

[John Holmberg]

George Yang's. Golden. Golden Coin. We're all done.

[Brady Bogan]

July 6th.

[Brett Vesely]

What's that guy in Ohio's place? Mark something or other.

[Brady Bogan]

Mark Pies. China Gate. The Noodle King.

[Nick Toledo]

Kudos to you, Brett, for logging that one away, too.

[John Holmberg]

No, he keeps those. Those little gems are in Brett's racist bag of tricks. Yeah, he's like Gallagher. Instead of fruity pussy out, a slur smashes it.

[Brady Bogan]

We got a horse that's in the Guinness World Records. A horse? Oh, not a.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I heard.

[Brady Bogan]

It's the oldest horse that's still living.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that would make sense.

[Brady Bogan]

Well,

[John Holmberg]

don't welcome that. That's just a bit because the.

[Brady Bogan]

The current. Not because the one that passed away was 38 years years old. This one is now 37 years in.329.

[John Holmberg]

It's an old horse. Yeah, there are much older horses that

[Brady Bogan]

are no longer recorded, according to the Guinness World Records. Was 62 years old.

[John Holmberg]

It made it 62.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, but that was back years ago in the early 1900s.

[John Holmberg]

They didn't keep good records.

[Brady Bogan]

And they're. They're questioning whether or not they don't

[John Holmberg]

even know how old.

[Brady Bogan]

Actually, I'm sorry. Old Billy died at the age of 62 in 1820. 22.

[John Holmberg]

That's gone. They don't even know how old Janice. Yeah, they don't know how old Jan is.

[Brady Bogan]

Careful.

[John Holmberg]

An 1810 horse. They have documentation. You know, Brett, that horse that died is no longer the oldest. Oh, really? Well, of the living ones, there's much older ones that are dead also. You know, like Genghis Consource. A lot older than the Horsebury. Talking about the ones that are living still. And then, you know, Nebuchadnezzar's horse. He was. And then Nimrod had. Yeah, Nimrod had about the Lone Ranger's horse. Silver is no longer part of the very old. But yeah, that's Trigger.

[Brady Bogan]

Trigger. I knew that would get him.

[John Holmberg]

He set me up.

[Brady Bogan]

Got a couple of pretty videos.

[John Holmberg]

Eight o' clock word is justice Still. It's gonna happen till nine. It's the oldest word in the eight o' clock hour.

[Brady Bogan]

Living. Currently living word. First one's a torn bicep.

[Nick Toledo]

Brady's been duped by AI.

[Brady Bogan]

AI.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, this is an AI one. Oh, we're gonna watch a. A guy pulling on a chain on his arm just kind of what the hell is this? For you, baby arm. The hell is wrong with you? That he was bringing to us. Did you believe that to be a thing? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Future is dim for you. Look at the way the.

[Brett Vesely]

Give me a hammer.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, by the way, Kirby, you can get away with anything. Your dad is a moron.

[Nick Toledo]

The column inside.

[Brady Bogan]

Only Samson can pull things like that.

[John Holmberg]

That's some of the worst special effects I've ever seen. Like Clash of the Titans was better.

[Brett Vesely]

Let's do the hammer challenge right now.

[Nick Toledo]

The columns fall into him

[John Holmberg]

and who. Unbelievable. Look at that.

[Brady Bogan]

Look at the manacon scene right there. And there's the kid in the arm.

[John Holmberg]

Jesus. Move on.

[Nick Toledo]

Well, that account really appreciates you.

[John Holmberg]

You sent that to him. Going good one. You thought that was a thing?

[Brady Bogan]

I knew exactly what would happen.

[John Holmberg]

No, you didn't.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

No, you didn't look. No, dumbass. And everybody knows you're not. You're not manipulating the room.

[Brady Bogan]

Toast boy over here.

[John Holmberg]

You're not the. Yeah, I take shots.

[Nick Toledo]

Toast day.

[Brady Bogan]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Jeez. I guess we've all been puppet mastered again. What a genius. Roll back to that.

[Brady Bogan]

We got a street fight.

[John Holmberg]

No, we did it. Look at this. It's a girl in thigh high boots and on D. Marie. D. Boy, oh, boy. What's that?

[Nick Toledo]

Jean boots.

[John Holmberg]

She cut her jeans off at the thighs and just left them as. As boots.

[Nick Toledo]

She's got that V hip thing going on.

[John Holmberg]

Travis Scott and the goosebumps.

[Brady Bogan]

Those are nice muscles.

[John Holmberg]

Is that real? Is she an A.I. or is she real?

[Nick Toledo]

I think she's real.

[John Holmberg]

That is. Here's Brady's.

[Nick Toledo]

This one's not A.I.

[John Holmberg]

all right, this is. Oh, we got a street fight. People in helmets and stuff. And they're swinging bats.

[Nick Toledo]

No, they're SW Sharp instruments.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, those are machetes. Toledo immediately bought tickets to visit this place. I can tell by the architecture. Oh, and a motorcycle just came blowing through the street. Fight.

[Brett Vesely]

Mark P's delivery guy just got knocked off his scooter.

[John Holmberg]

You don't need Mark Pie delivery there. Everybody's eating that already. It's like Ronald McDonald hit him.

[Nick Toledo]

Mark pie on every street.

[John Holmberg]

A Mark pie. Everybody's making Mark pie at home. You don't order out for Mark Pie there. It just happens. Look at this weird little fight in a Toledo. A Toledo destination. 100% you're. They have those weird accurate arches over their streets.

[Josh Blue]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

For no reason at all.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[Nick Toledo]

In Cambodia. That might be Cambodia.

[Wayne]

They have that.

[Nick Toledo]

Especially there.

[John Holmberg]

Like these wildly ornate, strange little arches.

[Brady Bogan]

That's the first Mark Pies trying to gate that.

[John Holmberg]

Was that the first one? That's Columbus.

[Brady Bogan]

That's the actual gate.

[John Holmberg]

China Gate, home of Brady. I live here now. Mark Pies China Gate. All right, all right.

[Brett Vesely]

I'm real light today, so go.

[Brady Bogan]

No. AI man.

[Brett Vesely]

No.

[John Holmberg]

I don't think. Yeah, exactly.

[Brett Vesely]

I wish it was AI. All right, here's a little. Little ramp action.

[John Holmberg]

It's a lady at Winston side. Oh, just a dude train. It's a. On a mini bike or something. Yeah. I think like it's supposed to be

[Brett Vesely]

an old kid's bike.

[John Holmberg]

It's like an indoor ski jump. And the guy loses control. Yeah. And he falls off of the ski jump onto concrete. That's not good.

[Josh Blue]

Yikes. And then this is.

[John Holmberg]

That was bad.

[Brett Vesely]

Streets of San Francisco.

[John Holmberg]

We're in San Francisco. There's a homeless guy behind some sort of sign.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

He's got a huge.

[Brett Vesely]

Talk about needing some fiber.

[John Holmberg]

He has got a two foot poop hanging out of his bottom on the streets of San Francisco. Michael Douglas and Carl Malden about to

[Brett Vesely]

walk right by that and it's still going.

[John Holmberg]

It's a Quinn Martin production. This dude has a large cone under that. Wow.

[Nick Toledo]

It's a Goodson Todman.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. No, no, not a good. That's game shows. Quinn Martin did Streets of San Francisco. Follow the bouncing ball. That is a four foot poop coming out of him. And it won't stop. Top. Oh, cut it off.

[Brady Bogan]

Good snap.

[Brett Vesely]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

That's all you got today. I told you. I was like, good. All right, Josh Blue's gonna come in here in a little bit. We should start his walk now and get him from the kitchen to here doing the process. Okay. The. The word is justice for the 8 o' clock hour and send you up to challenge. What's that?

[Brady Bogan]

Thriller.

[John Holmberg]

Thriller versus Josh.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. I go Josh.

[John Holmberg]

I wouldn't have hiked with Josh. Took us six hours to get up Camelback.

[Wayne]

Really?

[Nick Toledo]

You think worse than Thriller?

[John Holmberg]

Josh is in better shape. He's a little more outdoorsy than Thriller.

[Nick Toledo]

He's a little more prepared.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. Maybe in the long run.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. It's almost like a sprint versus a marathon.

[Brady Bogan]

I think Sprint may be right off the bat.

[John Holmberg]

I think Josh might take him down. I don't think Thriller can run anyway. Josh will be hitting her just a little bit. Where's he? Desert Ridge.

[Nick Toledo]

Tempe Improv.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's a Tempe. Okay. Josh will be at the Tempe Improv. We'll talk to Josh Blue coming up next. It's 98, Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station. February in Arizona is just about Perfect. It's Larry McFeely and the weather's great. The roads are calling, and now is the time to find your next Toyota. If you're looking for something tough, then check out the Toyota Tacoma and Tundra. They're built to handle the desert trails, weekend projects and everything in between. Need something smooth, efficient and easy to love? The Camry and Corolla deliver comfort, reliability and great fuel efficiency for your daily drive. No matter your lifestyle, there's a Toyota that fits you. Visit your valley toyota dealers or valleytoyodealers.com toyota let's go places. Hey, it's John and Brett from the morning sickness. And the nightmare of the holidays are behind us. And now it's time to treat yourself. The perfect time to fresh start everything with a new system quality car stereo. Upgrade your ride with better sound, smarter tech and service you can trust.

[Brett Vesely]

Whether it's carplay, Android audio, backup cameras, security systems, window tint or premium audio for your cars, boats, motorcycles or UTVs. This year, drives smarter and safer with quality car stereo. Quality car stereo in Mesa at the corner of Sauceman and Baseline. Make sure you check them out online at qual car stereoaz.com you thought that was funny?

[Ron Capps]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[John Holmberg]

What the hell is wrong with you? Palsy on ice is what we've been talking about off the air. Josh Blue is here. He's at the 10pm improv tonight, tomorrow and Saturday if you want to go 10pmprof.com and one of our favorite people to come wandering in here who's been doing doing this with us now, which would be about 18 or 19 years.

[Josh Blue]

It's crazy.

[John Holmberg]

That is nonsense. You said that your kids in college.

[Josh Blue]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

And we helped you while the woman was pregnant, I believe.

[Josh Blue]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

You really to divorce that lady on the air. You did it here on our show. Yeah, we did. We got hurt. We got. He said he was miserable with her. Called her C word like nine times. Not on air, you know, off the air. Yeah. No, I'm not. You're classic.

[Josh Blue]

Please.

[John Holmberg]

I give you more credit than that.

[Josh Blue]

Thank you.

[John Holmberg]

But then we said, well, let's call her and get you out of this because you were like. You seemed like you were afraid to go home.

[Josh Blue]

I was.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

I still am.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

We've been divorced for 10 years and

[John Holmberg]

we got you to.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, double check.

[John Holmberg]

Worst news about it though is that we thought we. You're fresh and clean out of that.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And you went back and got her pregnant again.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, double.

[John Holmberg]

And then you came back, you know, like, no, we're still together and she's pregnant again. And then we talked into really getting rid of her, and you finally stuck.

[Josh Blue]

You guys are really making differences.

[John Holmberg]

We changed home records. Well, in a good way, though.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. Yeah. No, I feel great.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you're. And you're happier.

[Josh Blue]

I am.

[John Holmberg]

You're welcome.

[Josh Blue]

Lightning airy.

[John Holmberg]

You're welcome. But, yeah. I can't believe it when you said that. I'm like, that means we've known you for almost 20 years.

[Brady Bogan]

So.

[Josh Blue]

I won Last Comic Standing in 2006.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Which is 20 years.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, 20 years.

[Josh Blue]

Isn't that insane?

[John Holmberg]

That doesn't mean 20 years. Unbelievable. Wow. And then you. And then you came in here and you started talking. We catching up and doing everything else. And right before we go on the air, you said you've been trying to put together Palsy on Ice. Those people who don't know you have a touch of palsy.

[Josh Blue]

No, I don't. I'm just a real prick.

[John Holmberg]

What's that? It's not a touch of. It's just a.

[Josh Blue]

You're just a dollop.

[John Holmberg]

A little dollop of palsy. That'll get you through a day, right?

[Josh Blue]

No, it's an idea I had for a while. Palsy and Ice, I think it's just we'd be like renting out hockey arenas, I think, and who wouldn't want to come? See, we'll just get a bunch of palsy people and push them out there.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. See what they can do.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. Last one standing gets the helmet.

[John Holmberg]

Can you skate?

[Josh Blue]

No. I don't know.

[Brady Bogan]

Too many people can find the Palsy quad God.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. If you could get a quad God and just an accidental one, like, he'd be just flailing around and then accidentally do four spins.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I'm telling you, it's tens across the

[Josh Blue]

board going to come.

[John Holmberg]

See, I'm telling you right now, I would. Not only would I buy tickets to that, I want to be an investor in it.

[Josh Blue]

Oh, yeah. Okay.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I want to put my money in this with you and. And you know palsy people. You probably.

[Josh Blue]

I know some. Yeah. And everyone I mentioned to, it's like, yeah, I'm in.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

What do you.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

What's good?

[John Holmberg]

What's the worst can happen? You limp more.

[Brett Vesely]

Blend in.

[Brady Bogan]

Some mascots.

[John Holmberg]

You can't.

[Josh Blue]

I mean, what's the mascot characters? You got me thinking.

[Brady Bogan]

Here comes Goofy.

[John Holmberg]

We're gonna put you in suits. Like. Yeah, like it's a masked singer and stuff. And they have you guys skating around and like what you don't know and we won't tell anybody. What you don't know is everyone in the suit has palsy. And that's why this has gone so poorly.

[Josh Blue]

The masked singer too. I always said I wanted to be on, I always wanted to be on that show. Masked singer. And then the puppet has palsy.

[Brady Bogan]

Is that Josh Blue in there?

[John Holmberg]

Immediately. Ken, jog. That's Josh Blue.

[Josh Blue]

Just, just until you hear a palsy guy singing too.

[John Holmberg]

And there's another one. Paulsy. Karaoke and cars. Driving in cars with people with palsy doing karaoke.

[Josh Blue]

Doing crack.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And let's, let's add in the pipe.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You drive around and we sing karaoke songs.

[Brady Bogan]

The lollipops.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I don't want to get crazy. I'm gonna get arrested.

[Josh Blue]

Suckers.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, like you're, you can drive.

[Josh Blue]

No, I don't have my license.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but you can drive.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, I drive.

[John Holmberg]

I didn't say you were legally doing it.

[Josh Blue]

I just bought a side by side.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's so smart.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, it's really dangerous.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, you're, you're not even your own side by side. Let's be honest. Half of you doesn't.

[Josh Blue]

It's very, thank you.

[John Holmberg]

Very good at this. Yeah. So. But yeah, you got a side by side. Are you riding the bottom of it?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, I, I, I, I do the in the back, the dump part.

[John Holmberg]

You get. Yeah, you get drug around.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

Well, actually, you know what?

[John Holmberg]

I, I want to see this. But you and me driving around, I'll let you drive my car.

[Josh Blue]

No, you.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, I will. I got a couple of them. All right. I'm insured. We pop you in there, we drive around you and I do karaoke. Comedian with palsy and cars. Doing karaoke. Getting coffee.

[Brady Bogan]

Let's do it with a, with a nice cup of piping hot coffee.

[John Holmberg]

Piping hot joe in one hand.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Piping hot show in one hand. My life in the other. Maybe

[Josh Blue]

a big bowl of soup.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, even better.

[John Holmberg]

Good road food. Oh, man. I didn't even think of this because it's insensitive. But since you're here and you started it.

[Josh Blue]

Oh, yeah. Cuz it's insensitive.

[John Holmberg]

That's why I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't. You know me, Josh. You know me. I would never think of, of pitting palsy against palsy. But I think it's Great for entertainment.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, yeah. No, for sure.

[John Holmberg]

Skating around. Have you ever worn skates?

[Josh Blue]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And how'd that go?

[Josh Blue]

No.

[John Holmberg]

The answer is no. 1 and done.

[Josh Blue]

You know what? This is the stupidest thing ever. But it was when I was a kid. It was like a camp retreat. I don't know. We went roller skating.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

Big bus of kids. We get to their rink, everybody gets off the bus running to go into the ranker. And I was unconscious before I even made it into the building. You know, the double doors, there's the divider in the middle.

[John Holmberg]

You ran into.

[Josh Blue]

I must have ran into that and not myself completely.

[Brady Bogan]

But you're running with the mob, not knowing.

[Josh Blue]

And I didn't even get. You got center even in the building.

[John Holmberg]

But can I ask you why your parents didn't. Why did they sign that slip to let you go on that field trip?

[Josh Blue]

You know, my parents were pretty okay with me getting hurt.

[Brady Bogan]

He was durable. They knew.

[John Holmberg]

Look at me now. You can take a over.

[Josh Blue]

Protect me. I'm the youngest of four, so by the time they got to me, they're like, ah, pa. Big deal.

[John Holmberg]

Did any. All the other kids, they came out all right?

[Josh Blue]

They had a great time.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, not at the thing.

[Josh Blue]

You're my siblings.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

So none of them have any disabilities, you know, that we talk about and.

[John Holmberg]

Oh,

[Josh Blue]

I'm lucky. My disabilities on the outside.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You have a good relationship with all of them, clearly.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, yeah, they're good. Good folks.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. But you don't like one of them.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

You have a favorite?

[Josh Blue]

Well, I have. So my brother is 10 years older and he's like the smartest dude. Like, there's nothing you can ask him that he doesn't know.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Josh Blue]

Like, going to a. Like, trivia with him is the worst. They're not even done saying the answer is, like, 1948.

[Brady Bogan]

The master.

[Josh Blue]

Easy, easy. Rain Man.

[John Holmberg]

So you like him?

[Josh Blue]

He's good. It's just a lot.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you don't like him?

[Josh Blue]

No, I. I love him.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I didn't ask that. You don't like him?

[Josh Blue]

No, but it's just like, I think he was never diagnosed with autism.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's got a wild case.

[Josh Blue]

I think he's just super autistic.

[John Holmberg]

Like the Asperger version. Like.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, like. Like very high functioning. Whatever.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Josh Blue]

But just can't.

[Brady Bogan]

He's not Rain Man.

[Josh Blue]

Right. Like the smartest dude you'll ever meet, but also really dumb. Just because he can't, like, socially put it to use.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. What does he do? For a living?

[Josh Blue]

Well, he works for me right now.

[John Holmberg]

Is that right? The smartest man you know is your underling.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

That's kind of funny.

[Brady Bogan]

What department?

[Josh Blue]

He works dinners.

[Brady Bogan]

Okay.

[Josh Blue]

He makes my dinner.

[John Holmberg]

Is that right?

[Josh Blue]

He cooks for the Me and my. He's your nutritionist and then. I wouldn't say that, but.

[John Holmberg]

Does he live at the house? He's a house boy.

[Josh Blue]

So I have another house that he lives in, and he comes over and. And does. He packs my bag.

[John Holmberg]

This sounds very 1840s.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

He's got a guy in the back house, comes up and does some work for him and he goes back to his place. Oh, I like it.

[Josh Blue]

But he's also a editor, so he. He works for, like, a publishing company.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, okay. So he's got another job, a real job, but he's actually your whipping boy.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, but I'm afraid of him. Older brothers, I don't say boo.

[John Holmberg]

Did your brothers and sisters pick on you or beat you up?

[Josh Blue]

You know. You know, being the youngest, I got away with a lot. Yeah, but they definitely did.

[John Holmberg]

They did their work.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, for sure. Like, when I was probably about 9 or 10, both my sisters convinced me there was something wrong with me because I hadn't had my period. And, like, they went as far as, like, giving me a tampon. Said like, you might want to bring this to school in case it just, like, pops up. And I was like, okay. And then for two weeks, I had

[Brady Bogan]

that in my backpack.

[Josh Blue]

And then my mom got a note home like, we found Josh with a tampon.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, this is your story. You blamed it on them, but you were really wanted to run a tampon.

[Josh Blue]

They really did.

[John Holmberg]

They really did. If it was. If you were my brother and I was in on this.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

While you slept, I would have poured like, red substance into your. Into your underwear.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Thank you. You woke up and next level, and it made you crazy.

[Josh Blue]

Tell mom.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

Oh, yeah, they said that too. If it doesn't show up soon, you might want to tell mom about it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God.

[Josh Blue]

Brutal.

[John Holmberg]

And then how did you find out? It was all a joke.

[Josh Blue]

I'm still waiting.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

Part of me is like, ah, maybe you're pregnant.

[John Holmberg]

You might be pregnant.

[Josh Blue]

Josh, I'm 46. I'm. I'm waiting for, like, menopause. No.

[Brady Bogan]

He flashes anything.

[Josh Blue]

I'm perimenopause.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, it happens. You get a little hot, confused. It's hard to follow a sentence. Yeah, I get it. Yeah. That's awful. I'm sorry. You're going through that.

[Josh Blue]

No, that's fine, man. I'm. I'm, you know, just part of life's process.

[John Holmberg]

That's right. That's a beautiful thing. Did you ever tell your sister. Do they still laugh at that?

[Josh Blue]

Oh, they still.

[John Holmberg]

Because it's hilarious. I've never heard a better prank.

[Josh Blue]

Isn't that funny?

[John Holmberg]

I love that.

[Josh Blue]

That's pretty brutal.

[John Holmberg]

And they. Then you were hook, line, and sinker. Oh, I need a period. You never said, like, part of me

[Josh Blue]

was like, no, they can't. Well, why would they lie? You know, like. Like naive and stupid.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

I believed it.

[John Holmberg]

You remember? And I don't know why this is. Well, this is on my mind because last week I had seven days where I couldn't move because of my eye. And I realized that it's the first time. That's the longest stretch of not masturbating or ejaculating in 43 years.

[Josh Blue]

You couldn't masturbate because of your eyes.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, because eye pressure. Because your heart rate goes up, and then you get eye pressure. Like, you can't bend over. You. You can't do anything right.

[Wayne]

Whoa.

[John Holmberg]

So I. I realized this is the longest stretch I've ever had. And then I thought back to the very first time, and, like, it would have been like your period. It would have been like a thing where I was like, what is this? Am I okay? Should I talk to someone about what just happened?

[Josh Blue]

What happened?

[John Holmberg]

Because in the bathtub, I made these white worms. That's right. I told this to Brady. Yeah. I was in the bathtub making. Making the.

[Josh Blue]

Well, let's move on.

[John Holmberg]

Making the ectoplasm.

[Brady Bogan]

I've heard of white worms.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I was just going to ask. Do you remember your first time time doing that?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Talk about it.

[Josh Blue]

It was last week, right after you

[John Holmberg]

got off your period. You don't want to make it messy. Like Thousand island dressing all over the place.

[Brady Bogan]

Finally, the tampon went to use.

[Josh Blue]

I think it was like. Remember back in the day with, like, cable when you could. We didn't have the channels, like, but

[Brady Bogan]

you had to scramble it.

[Josh Blue]

The scramble one where you can see it. Blue, blurry.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

And it was like Cinemax or something. And I remember seeing some boobs.

[John Holmberg]

Weird green, lopsided, but just in one spot.

[Josh Blue]

That's all it took.

[John Holmberg]

That's all it took. That was a noise you were making a lot around the house, so nobody even.

[Josh Blue]

What was that?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

Let's do that again.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna turn it back to that channel.

[Josh Blue]

I think it's done that 80, 000 times since then.

[John Holmberg]

I worried. Oh, I actually did. Did the math that. It's been 15, 460 days since my first tug.

[Josh Blue]

Really?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And I. Yeah. And I realized that.

[Josh Blue]

A lot of time on your hand.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I had seven days. Seven days. I wasn't allowed to move, so I had to stare at the ground for seven days. And those thoughts go through mine. So I had the phone in front of me. I'm like, how long has it been? Since March 15, 1983.

[Josh Blue]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

And. And so there it was. And it. And then I realized that I will never.

[Josh Blue]

So you did the math.

[John Holmberg]

I'm on the back. Back end of it. And like, so I've done it at least 15, 000 times.

[Josh Blue]

Right. So that's like three a day for a while.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah. I probably. I probably hit. I bet you I'm around 30 some thousand.

[Josh Blue]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

Pretty good.

[Josh Blue]

Impressive.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, thanks.

[Brady Bogan]

Top that number.

[John Holmberg]

Can I be part of Palsy on Ice? I've got a special trick.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, man. Maybe another little head injury.

[Brady Bogan]

Here comes Jackman.

[John Holmberg]

Let's do. Now, you and I hiked Camelback Mountain together in June once. And now I want you to ride a mountain bike with me.

[Josh Blue]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, man. But you were so gung ho about the whole hiking Everest stuff.

[Josh Blue]

It wasn't Everest. You wanted to kill a Manjaro.

[Brady Bogan]

That's.

[John Holmberg]

That's your Everest man.

[Josh Blue]

It's a PA Man's big E. Pay man's biggie. That's what that is. That's my next book. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

It was six hours going up Camelback. You'd still be hiking if it wasn't for me.

[Josh Blue]

Well, I'd be dead.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's true. I forgot. That would have happened first, you know.

[Brady Bogan]

Has there been a person with Palsy Summit Kilmanjaro that you know?

[Josh Blue]

Yep.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Guy named Dumb McDumbass Banner.

[Josh Blue]

Banner Paddock or something. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Is he an inspiration, or do you consider him stupid?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. I hate that guy.

[Brady Bogan]

Would you have done it before him or.

[John Holmberg]

He already.

[Josh Blue]

He had already done it. I learned that he had already done it once I started training.

[John Holmberg]

He's also just recent.

[Josh Blue]

No, he did it. Like. I mean. Yeah. So I don't know when he did it, but.

[Brady Bogan]

But that discouraged you a little bit. Like, why am I doing this?

[Josh Blue]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

What's the.

[John Holmberg]

My second. You know, who wants to be Amelia?

[Josh Blue]

And he's more wonky than me, so I was like, oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

So you're like a healthier version of him and you didn't do it first. It's just. It's just.

[Josh Blue]

And he did it, and I didn't even do it.

[John Holmberg]

No, you struggled with this one.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, I fell down some stairs.

[John Holmberg]

That's right.

[Josh Blue]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

Forgot. In an apartment building. Right. You fell downstairs.

[Josh Blue]

It was actually at the comedy club and Denver, and I was surprisingly sober.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

And you.

[John Holmberg]

Did you break your pelvis or.

[Josh Blue]

I cracked my. What's it called? The coccyx.

[John Holmberg]

Coccyx. Yeah. You busted your coccyx falling downstairs. And you. And there. And you text me immediately. I remember we were talking about that.

[Brady Bogan]

You said, I'm out.

[John Holmberg]

I. I'm not going to climb the mountain anymore. I fell down some stairs.

[Josh Blue]

Did you ever see the. I made, like, a documentary about it. Kill him with Josho.

[John Holmberg]

Was any of our footage.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm in it.

[John Holmberg]

Where's my royalties?

[Josh Blue]

You're in. I'm negative and.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, you lost money, too.

[Brady Bogan]

You have to sign the waiver.

[John Holmberg]

My zero is a big win.

[Josh Blue]

There's a part of you above me, filming down. You're like. I'm climbing Camelback with Josh Blue and what I'm calling the worst Grinder date ever.

[John Holmberg]

That was pretty fun. It turned out to be a pretty good grinder date. At the end. We had a nice lunch.

[Josh Blue]

I was exhausted.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, me too. I could have done anything to him. He couldn't move. Josh Blues at the Tempe Improv Tonight, Tomorrow and Saturday, tempeimprov.com if you want to go. You've written a book. You brought it with you. What do you do? What is your book about?

[Josh Blue]

Me?

[John Holmberg]

It's called Something to Stare At.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, something.

[John Holmberg]

You look very Mark Twain on the COVID of the book. It's a great. That's a great picture.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. So basically it's just autobiography about. You know, I was.

[Brady Bogan]

A lot of pictures.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, pictures and big font.

[John Holmberg]

I gotta tell you, Joshua and I looked an awful lot alike in the third grade. That's a picture of you in third grade.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Let me see that again. I'm not kidding. Geez, that's weird.

[Josh Blue]

Oh, my brother.

[John Holmberg]

I might have looked at that and thought it was me. I'm not kidding. We had the same.

[Brady Bogan]

This is where you really look alike in a.

[John Holmberg]

In a weird.

[Brady Bogan]

He's in a cage.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, we were both caged as children.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. So basically, it's just my story. You know, I think people, you know, have seen me on the TV and all the stuff I've done, but they don't really realized I was born in Africa. Yeah. I was born in Cameroon. I used to live in Senegal. I speak French and wolf.

[Brady Bogan]

And you said Your dad speaks 13 languages?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. What did your dad do?

[Josh Blue]

He was a professor. Language professor. French and Italian mainly, but he dated Rosetta Stone.

[Brady Bogan]

Was he.

[John Holmberg]

Was he did. Was he born here? Yeah, he's born and then moved to Senegal to a job, obviously.

[Josh Blue]

It was like a. Like a exchange program for professors.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, cool.

[Josh Blue]

They sent one to his college and he went to there.

[John Holmberg]

And he took his pregnant wife to Senegal?

[Josh Blue]

Well, she wasn't pregnant at the time.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he knocked her up inside?

[Josh Blue]

Well, no, in Cameroon.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, okay.

[Josh Blue]

Okay. I was born again.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, that's right. You went back for Senegal.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, I was 15 when I was in Senegal.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, and then you came out in Senegal and lived your first year or two there? No, Cameroon or Cameroon. I keep saying. And then you came back. I'm not smart enough to follow this. I'm never going.

[Josh Blue]

So it's different places.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, he was a toddler in Cameroon.

[John Holmberg]

I hate to say it, but I think they look exactly the same to be on there. So then you come back to the States y. And you move to Colorado or something?

[Josh Blue]

No, Minnesota. So, okay, so Cameroon to Minnesota, Minnesota to Senegal.

[John Holmberg]

Natural progression.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. Same climate.

[John Holmberg]

Very similar climates. It's hard to know where. When one stops and one begins.

[Josh Blue]

The only thing in common is mosquitoes.

[John Holmberg]

And then you went back to Senegal as an adult.

[Josh Blue]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

And how was that?

[Josh Blue]

That was awesome.

[John Holmberg]

You like Senegal?

[Josh Blue]

I do. That's. Well, there's a big portion of the book is about my time in Africa, because when I was in college, I did an internship in a zoo in Senegal and I was there for three months. And there's a whole thing about me being an animal on display in the zoo. I had him locked me in a cage for an entire day next to a 400 pound gorilla.

[John Holmberg]

Why were you a hostage or were you actually working?

[Brady Bogan]

Experiment.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, it was like a social experiment.

[John Holmberg]

Interesting. And people came by to see the.

[Josh Blue]

They said it was the busiest day of the zoo they've ever had to see you. Yeah. And they. And it was before cell phones.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

So people must have been leaving the zoo, going and being like, hey man, you gotta come see this thing.

[Brady Bogan]

Have you seen the albino silver back?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it was the. It was the initial. Like you went viral before there was.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, totally. And they were. They called me the boo Boo monkey.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know, that's probably bad monkey. And so they'd never seen like a white man in a cage before, like. Well, the draw.

[Josh Blue]

Well, I was only wearing shorts.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Josh Blue]

Barefoot, no shirt. I'm a real hairy guy. And if you take the palsy out of context, they didn't know what the hell.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they weren't told.

[Josh Blue]

They weren't.

[John Holmberg]

They just thought you were you, that you were primate.

[Josh Blue]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

So. Oh.

[Josh Blue]

So then like the zookeepers came up with this whole scenario. They said they captured me in the mountains of the Congo. It was like a whole.

[Brady Bogan]

Like a state fair.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, yeah. People were like. And they showed up and people were like throwing bananas to me.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding.

[Josh Blue]

I mean, it's all in the book.

[John Holmberg]

Were you laughing?

[Josh Blue]

I was. I had studied like you stated character. Yeah. I didn't talk at all. And I just made grunting noises. Places. And like, because I've been working with a gorilla.

[Brady Bogan]

You throw poo at them or anything?

[Josh Blue]

Not my poo, but.

[John Holmberg]

Right. Yeah. That's classless. Did you groom each other in the.

[Josh Blue]

Well, when you share a wall of bars with a 400 pound gorilla.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

It's terrible.

[John Holmberg]

It's horrifying. Yeah. I can't imagine that that was a in.

[Josh Blue]

Well, I became one of three people in the world that could pet that. That gorilla. It was amazing, really. But they have siesta there where they take a three, three hour break during the hottest part of the day. And I chose to stay in the

[John Holmberg]

cage with the gorilla.

[Josh Blue]

Well, I mean, I mean you hit a bar between. But still bars between us. But.

[Brady Bogan]

So there was a shift before that they would trade out guys like you'd have. There'd be another guy that come in

[John Holmberg]

and do the same thing, the bobo monkey.

[Brady Bogan]

So then only one bobo monkey.

[Josh Blue]

So then all the zookeepers went on break and left me in the zoo alone. And I was in there and I heard metal bending and I look over and the gorillas wrapped his hands around the door between the two cages and he's like peeling it back.

[John Holmberg]

I'm like, oh, this is not going to end well.

[Josh Blue]

They're going to come back in a couple hours. I'm going to be in pieces. So then for three hours I just like played with the gorilla running back

[John Holmberg]

and forth and like pissing him off

[Josh Blue]

and just distracting him from the door.

[John Holmberg]

Bending that door. Oh my. Is that in the book?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Oh my God, Josh, that's horrifying.

[Josh Blue]

That's cool.

[John Holmberg]

And then. But see, I don't think that you were being treated nicely. I think that. Well, I think they were being mean to you.

[Brady Bogan]

No, no, it doesn't sound real nice.

[Josh Blue]

I made all these decisions.

[Brady Bogan]

Okay.

[Josh Blue]

They were like, are you sure you want to stay in here?

[Brady Bogan]

Just don't forget about me.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And they did.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Just leave him. We will be back in a minute, Josh. Wow.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And did they throw money or anything at you? Do you get any cash for this?

[Josh Blue]

Just like of peanuts.

[John Holmberg]

Peanuts. You got a lot of peanuts?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah. Fruits. It was the best I ate the whole time was.

[John Holmberg]

What do you want people to take away from your book?

[Josh Blue]

The book.

[Brady Bogan]

JoshBlue.com.

[Josh Blue]

yeah, dot com. So if you get on Josh.com, i will sign it and put the. Okay. Well, that's the downside. I also mail it. Oh, it's gonna be late.

[John Holmberg]

So you promised that there won't be a timely delivery.

[Josh Blue]

No, I guarantee it will not.

[Brady Bogan]

There.

[John Holmberg]

Josh will hand deliver it. He'll walk it to your home. So you'll get it sometime for 2031

[Brady Bogan]

if you want it for St. Patty's Day. That's gonna be tight.

[Josh Blue]

Well, I mean, Christmas is pushing.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. I. I want to read that. Josh Blue. You can read. No, I haven't read too. I've got people for that.

[Brady Bogan]

You have an audio book?

[Josh Blue]

Not yet.

[John Holmberg]

You're gonna do it?

[Josh Blue]

I. Well, once I learn to read, can

[John Holmberg]

I read your audiobook?

[Josh Blue]

That would be great.

[John Holmberg]

I have a lovely voice. You don't trust me? I'll just read the words. What do you think I'm gonna do? You know, I might. Are there C words in it?

[Josh Blue]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's what's missing. That's why it's not selling.

[Josh Blue]

It's a good book.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, you wouldn't be here hucking away for that if it was a flying off the shelf.

[Josh Blue]

I just came to talk to you guys.

[John Holmberg]

That's exactly right. And we appreciate that. I always like having Josh here. Well, I want that book. I want to read your book. For a book on, like.

[Josh Blue]

I'll leave it here for. For you guys, and then I'll read

[John Holmberg]

it and I'll send it to you

[Josh Blue]

and you can back. And then I'll.

[John Holmberg]

And then you can say. Well, then you can say the audiobook. I'll do it with a British accent or something.

[Josh Blue]

All right, let's hear it.

[John Holmberg]

Let me. Give me a page. Give me your book. Let me read Josh Blues. Something to stare at. And it's chapter one now. I'm not gonna read the forward. Nobody ever reads that. Is the palsy punch. Chapter one. Yeah. And we need, like, a little, like, music behind it or something. Like a little soft. I don't know. Like something. The palsy punch. I was apprehensive. It was my first day at junior high school, and up until that point, my peers were disabled kids and we rode the short bus. Huh.

[Josh Blue]

That's pretty good.

[John Holmberg]

Really good.

[Josh Blue]

Strong.

[John Holmberg]

Seaword. Seawood. C word. Now I was moving on. Just throw those in there. My nickname was the C word. The crooked SeaWorld.

[Josh Blue]

Crooked SeaWorld.

[John Holmberg]

The limping SeaWorld. Good and. Yeah, see, I'm good at this. I can read your. It's a big book, though. I don't know if I could.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, a lot of pages. I don't think you have the. There's pictures.

[John Holmberg]

There's that gorilla.

[Josh Blue]

Yeah, that's the gorilla.

[Brady Bogan]

What was the gorilla's name?

[Josh Blue]

Dear Pacola.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, man. All right, well, I have something to stare at. The great Josh Blue. An author, an actor, a comedian, an entrepreneur, a philanthropist.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh.

[Josh Blue]

Can I tell you what I bought?

[John Holmberg]

Yes.

[Josh Blue]

Crazy. I was so excited.

[John Holmberg]

Brad's gonna get mad at you, you know.

[Josh Blue]

You know, I don't drives. And most like successful people buy like a nice sports car, so what I bought instead was a excavator.

[John Holmberg]

What in the world. You're gonna dig stuff.

[Josh Blue]

I bought a full on excavator.

[Brady Bogan]

Like a Kabota. Like a. Like a bobcat.

[Josh Blue]

Like.

[John Holmberg]

Like one big one.

[Josh Blue]

Like the.

[Brady Bogan]

Like with the cage on it. Yeah.

[Josh Blue]

And the one that just Because. Well, because I have that land in the mountains.

[John Holmberg]

Might as well wreck it.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. Moving some stuff.

[Josh Blue]

Moving rocks around. Like. Not like a bobcat, but like one with the big boy.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Blue]

Digging the hole with the thumb on it so I could pick up boulders. I'm having so much fun. It's like the best thing I've ever done.

[John Holmberg]

Sounds awesome.

[Josh Blue]

Everyone's like, you bought a what?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's pretty. How much are those?

[Josh Blue]

A lot.

[John Holmberg]

Like 100 grand?

[Josh Blue]

No, not that much.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, okay. Well, that's a lot to me.

[Josh Blue]

Oh, well, that's.

[John Holmberg]

Whatever's a lot to you is you'll get there someday.

[Brady Bogan]

Keep working.

[John Holmberg]

Keep working, kid. Maybe you'll sell this book and we'll get you some more. Josh has to go because he's got to go do channel 10 now, which is a waste of time. Something to stare at is the book. Do you want the book for Visual reasons? For channel 10?

[Josh Blue]

Well, are you coming back? Can we hang out this weekend or got something else to do?

[John Holmberg]

No, I got nothing.

[Brady Bogan]

We'll take the book.

[John Holmberg]

You take this. Yeah. Cuz you've only got the one.

[Josh Blue]

I. I'll. I'll give it to you.

[John Holmberg]

All right, that's a deal. Give me a used book. It's discount.

[Josh Blue]

I'll meet you on camel back.

[John Holmberg]

We'll walk it out. We'll pass it like drums broke back Camel back. We'll do it. Josh Blue at the Tempe Improv. Always a pleasure.

[Josh Blue]

You guys are the best.

[John Holmberg]

Leave us with words of wisdom quickly. You've got to run the.

[Josh Blue]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Perfect. That's exactly right. It's not yet Arizona's most powerful powerful rock radio station. With a global credit card you earn reward points for every purchase. Use your rewards at checkout at many of your favorite stores or use points instead of cash when you shop online. You can even use them to book a flight up to three days in advance. New York, Vegas, Albuquerque Albuquerque. From gross groceries to getaways, redeem your way. Apply for your global credit card [e-mail] Global Credit Union. Your world of financial possibilities.

[Brady Bogan]

It's Brady for Gameday Men's health. The valley's largest men's health clinic with 12 locations. You should schedule a complimentary appointment today. Go to gamedaymenshealth.com Every location has a cool man cave environment. You'll sit down with a board certified medical director and figure out what treatments that can help you. They have an on site lab and you will know what your testosterone level is during your first meeting. Do what thousands of Phoenix area men are doing by going to gamedaymen's health.com and schedule your complimentary appointment. You got to get back in the game with game day Men's health.

[Ron Capps]

You thought that was funny. You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[John Holmberg]

What the hell is wrong with you? All right. There you go. Metallica is all we're thinking about for a little bit here. That's pretty good deal and you guys can benefit from it. The word is to meant megaforce. Dale is not coming in today. In the easy joke that we said he's getting a brain scan. They still haven't found it. Haha. But he is getting that. So good luck to our buddy Dale. He's going, he's going in there taking a Look at the NFL's looking at his monster brain trying to figure out, you know what's going on. And I'm hoping.

[Brady Bogan]

Well you heard from that the past two players that died that were pretty young. One was like 52 and the family is totally.

[John Holmberg]

Everybody wants brains. Yeah, well that's the thing. And Dale's hopefully gets a huge paycheck. That's the. That's the goal in all this, is to be make sure that the family's covered when Dale starts going full Dale on the end of this. But, you know, we'll see he and Nash on the podcast, which we had to miss this last week because of me again. But they have a bet on who's gonna die first.

[Brett Vesely]

Who's your fanduel on?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you know, it's a tough one because Dave is so bright red and wound up so tight, there's no weight.

[Brady Bogan]

His heart, it's an explosion.

[John Holmberg]

He is. He is an absolute tempest of blood pressure. And he says he's not, but he just talks. He turns bright red and it's just. He just looks like he's not going to make it. And then Dale, of course, is just hanging by a thread every step. You're just waiting for that to be the last one. So it is my fear that they will be at my funeral because that means something terrible has happened. There's no way. And I've made that. There's no way I die of natural causes before either them of. Of those two. Even if I get diagnosed with something terrible today, I'm still going to outlive them. They maybe have the summer, the two of them, and they're going to go 1, 2. They're going to be like those old couples that die in the same week. There's no way, David.

[Brady Bogan]

They couldn't live without them.

[John Holmberg]

Well, no, I just think that they're just unhealthy. I can't quit. I wish it was that. There's nothing romantic about it. They just. They're just both so wildly unhealthy. It's just going to be Domino's. Boom, boom. But. And yeah, but Dale's going in, so we don't have a Dale today. And that's, you know, we'll live with that. But we do do have is Ron Caps and he's a NHRA superstar world champion. Multiple to too many to count. Not as many as John Force, but too many to count. And he's going to be popping in here in a little bit. They're doing some time trials, I guess today. Is that right?

[Brady Bogan]

He might be coming in with Maddie Gordon, who's a girl. That is the top fuel he's got on his team. On his team.

[John Holmberg]

Nice. Yeah. Caps is a businessman now. That's awesome. One Ball Racing is going to join us in just a little bit for yet another. Now there's been probably 15 years of caps too. We've probably been at this with him for a long, long time. Maybe even more long. Yeah, crazy longer. Ron Caps will be here in just a little bit. One of the best people on the planet. It's 98 Morning Sickness. 98 Holmberg's Morning Sickness. Well, for a guy who goes 350 miles an hour for a living, he sure is taking his sweet time getting here to make and drive him. No, we wouldn't. Well, see you tomorrow. Ron Capp's gonna join us in just a little bit. We had that story earlier this morning about, would you shave 10 years off of your life expectancy? 10 mil for $10 million? I have it, Brady. Don't worry about it. You need to jump all over me anyway. What if the doctor said you got 11 years to live? Kyle came up with this and he says, so what if your life lifespan, the doctor said you got about 11 guaranteed years left, but for $10 million, we'll shave off 10 of those.

[Brady Bogan]

So you're down to 110 to 110 mil.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You basically get one more year. Is it worth the 10 million? At what age do you stop thinking about that deal?

[Brady Bogan]

I take that because a guy, one of the other people said, would you. How about five mil for five years off?

[John Holmberg]

Like, five years is easy. And $5 million for five years, 10 million, and you've only got 11 left guaranteed. Like the doctor says, you've got 11 years to live. Your life expectancy for a man is 75. Right. So if you're 65 and somebody says, I'll give you $10 million, but you're gonna die this year, would you take it?

[Josh Blue]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, I wouldn't.

[John Holmberg]

You wouldn't?

[Nick Toledo]

Why, at 75?

[John Holmberg]

Or you want to. You want to. You want to careen this thing into the guardrails into your 70s? Yeah, I could, man. You think I'm not a doctor, but I'm pretty sure you're not going to do that. It's going to be ugly.

[Brett Vesely]

You what? Take 10 million for one year left?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, sure, why not?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, I've got a good run of a run for that one year.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. I keep saying that, like if credits started rolling right now on this movie, I'd be like, that's fine. People always say life is short. I'm like, no, it's not. We're in the tail end of this thing and Act 3 is dragging.

[Brady Bogan]

It would be a glorious year.

[John Holmberg]

It be a great year.

[Nick Toledo]

Oh, you.

[John Holmberg]

You would rather test out what you're going to be like in your 70s than take 10 million and just go for another 12 months.

[Brady Bogan]

The you're going to benefit from that would be Kirby.

[John Holmberg]

Well, yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

The one year.

[John Holmberg]

So how about it's Brewster's Millions, though. You got to spend it zeroed out. You can't start hand it off. I like that you said that and Ronnie part at the end to kind of keep yourself out of the doghouse. And that girl, that lady that steals from you. The. But for one year.

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I think you should take it. If anybody in the room should be saying yes to that, it's you.

[Brady Bogan]

Do I get to pick the day

[Nick Toledo]

when the year starts?

[John Holmberg]

The day the. The day the money arrives. You get 12 months.

[Brady Bogan]

Okay.

[Brett Vesely]

As long as my dogs are taken care of.

[John Holmberg]

That's kind of how I am. I'm like, people are fine because they've got cognitive. Cognitive reasoning. So I don't worry so much about leaving them behind. Yep. Dogs are like reliant on. But you know, if you've got somebody taking care of them, like. All right, we're in good shape. I made sure everybody's in good. That's good. Yeah. You don't want.

[Brady Bogan]

Do you spin those after the fact? Like the pets. You know, you're making sure they're dealing to that earlier or you.

[John Holmberg]

What do you mean?

[Nick Toledo]

You live the whole time Megan's not dying with him.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. No, that are low. What are you asking? I don't know.

[Brady Bogan]

I was just thinking, like, when would you. Yeah. Make sure the pets are right. I mean, like, if. If Megan wasn't in the ocean.

[John Holmberg]

I have. My Trajan estate plan is all about my pets. In fact, it's named the pet plan. Yeah, that's. It's. It's not about people. People can care for themselves. This is about them. And they're well taken care of. But if I had 10 million bucks, I'd be. The first thing I'd do is spend a few million dollars on making sure they've got, like, a facility for my dogs. That is outrageous. And then make sure that I put the proper people in place. Yeah, I don't have one of those oh, I gotta live forever kind of vibes. That's fine. I know.

[Brett Vesely]

Matthias, just text. Well, what about your wife? Go.

[John Holmberg]

You'll be taking care of the dog.

[Brett Vesely]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

She'll be fine. You're. You make decisions, Mathias.

[Wayne]

You.

[John Holmberg]

You. You get dogs to look after.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And you're gonna have a hell of a run with Brett, right.

[Brett Vesely]

For that one year.

[John Holmberg]

One year you get to be included in at least three months of that. And then he's going to start farming it out. But still, what does he have to do?

[Brady Bogan]

Lose?

[John Holmberg]

There's no way you do a divorce. You're going to take half. Yeah, that. That would be like.

[Brady Bogan]

Just cut her the half now.

[John Holmberg]

Think about it. Think of how freeing that would be. Like it just like. You don't have to sit and worry about any of that. It's like, okay, you're. Well, if it. After three months you're like, I'm going to tote you around to this beach all day long.

[Brady Bogan]

Still work, John.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I know. Those people piss me off again. It would be the first thing I'd do is to go get plastic surgery on my middle finger to come here and flip everybody off on my last day. And I like working here. But yeah, one last year. That's not a bad thing. Brady. You can start eating those McDonald's arches at a breakneck speeds and not have to worry about anything.

[Brett Vesely]

Shamrock Shakespeare shamrock shakes until you're drowned.

[John Holmberg]

Brady, you might not make a year. You might die in green milkshake shakes first month. Wouldn't that be a shame?

[Brady Bogan]

Impossible. The machines are never working.

[John Holmberg]

That's true. They don't ever have those things up to snuff anyway. It's a good question, Kyle. I like that one, huh? Ten million, one year. Rather than, you know, dragging your single kidney nonsense.

[Brady Bogan]

Would it be different?

[John Holmberg]

70s, 10 years earlier? What do you mean?

[Brady Bogan]

40s like you when you're 40?

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. Look who's here.

[Brady Bogan]

The gang is here.

[John Holmberg]

Ron Caps brought beautiful people. You can go home. Come on in here, Maddie. Everybody sit down. No, going right on. I'm John. Nice to meet you. Recap. Stand in the background. Maddie's here for God's sakes. What do we need to talk to you for? What are you going to the bathroom for? Christ, maddie. He goes 700 miles an hour for a living. It took him an hour to get here. What was he walking? What's up with. What is going on? Introduce yourself, Maddie.

[Josh Blue]

Who are you there?

[John Holmberg]

She's talking to Brett already. Grab that mic and. Yeah, get the headphones on so you can hear everything properly. You're a race car driver.

[Brady Bogan]

She's a speed demon.

[John Holmberg]

You are. This. This is. Why do you hate your parents so much? Grab the mic and get in on us.

[Ron Capps]

Okay, okay.

[Brady Bogan]

All right.

[Ron Capps]

I'm here. I'm here.

[John Holmberg]

Maddie. What's your last name?

[Ron Capps]

Maddie Gordon.

[John Holmberg]

Maddie Gordon. And you are a. You're a beautiful model race car driver.

[Ron Capps]

I like that. That sounds cool.

[John Holmberg]

You know it. Let's not pretend your Instagram is with a little swag. Let's not pretend your Instagram isn't filled with you in like, dresses and bikinis.

[Ron Capps]

It's not.

[Nick Toledo]

It's not.

[John Holmberg]

It's not. Why not?

[Ron Capps]

Because I'm a race car driver.

[John Holmberg]

I work on race cars, but fan base through the moon.

[Ron Capps]

No, it's been good though.

[Brady Bogan]

When she starts winning.

[John Holmberg]

How'd you get into that?

[Ron Capps]

It's a family. So my grandfather started driving about 40 years ago, and then my dad drove for 30 years.

[John Holmberg]

Holy cow.

[Ron Capps]

My sister and I. I mean, I went to my first race at eight days old.

[Brady Bogan]

So then you remember it.

[Ron Capps]

I know. You know how you have like those milestones? Like, oh, you know, she started walking here. Well, I rolled over at Chicago. Everything's like, what race? Documented, right?

[John Holmberg]

At the race.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

No kidding.

[Josh Blue]

Yep.

[Ron Capps]

Basically grew up at the racetrack.

[John Holmberg]

So you grew up around the noise and the fun and all the stuff, right?

[Ron Capps]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I gotta get that one.

[Ron Capps]

Oh, yes.

[John Holmberg]

And then. And then how do you run into caps?

[Ron Capps]

So we're from the same hometown.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, really?

[Ron Capps]

So San Luis Obispo.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I'm sorry. I'll talk slower. I didn't know you're from where Ron's from. I've been speeding by you like one of your figuring it out. All right, so you're from Slo. Okay. I got you the slow, as they say.

[Ron Capps]

The slow.

[Wayne]

I've already warned her about you guys.

[John Holmberg]

So you know why they call it slow, right?

[Ron Capps]

I don't.

[John Holmberg]

Cuz caps grew up there.

[Ron Capps]

Oh, man. Good thing he's here to defend himself.

[John Holmberg]

How do you have an accent from Kentucky?

[Brady Bogan]

It's a racing accent.

[John Holmberg]

How did you develop that in San Luis Obispo?

[Ron Capps]

Yeah, you know, when you go to the races, you're around all those Midwest people, you know.

[Wayne]

Oh, nice.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, cabs doesn't have one of those.

[Brady Bogan]

That's part of the training. They teach you that accent.

[Wayne]

Good thing there's no video in here, huh?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, no videos.

[Wayne]

Turn red.

[Ron Capps]

I'm getting red, guys.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, so you. You are. You're racing. So when is the first time you start racing?

[Ron Capps]

So we just finished testing. Got my. My license upgrade.

[John Holmberg]

But that was your first race.

[Ron Capps]

My first race ever?

[Brady Bogan]

No, when.

[John Holmberg]

When did you start? Like, when did you get behind the wheel and go, I'm doing this?

[Ron Capps]

Well, I mean, I started driving when I was 8 years old, but I started my.

[John Holmberg]

It's illegal.

[Ron Capps]

I did testing in the top fuel car last week.

[Wayne]

She drove an alcohol funny car. The slower funny cars than ours. Yeah. 250 miles per hour.

[John Holmberg]

That was passive.

[Brady Bogan]

So that's what I saw like last week or two weeks ago. You're signing the papers.

[John Holmberg]

Yes.

[Brady Bogan]

You're officially licensed.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. So you are not. You are just getting into this like right now.

[Wayne]

Made her first runs last week.

[Ron Capps]

Yes.

[Wayne]

First time ever. Went 325 on her license mile.

[John Holmberg]

That's your first try?

[Josh Blue]

Yes.

[Ron Capps]

I went faster than I've ever gone. So we.

[Brady Bogan]

You.

[Ron Capps]

I would go 271 to the quarter mile. I went over 280 to the eighth mile which is half the distance.

[Brady Bogan]

That's all numbers.

[John Holmberg]

So previously you were just driving Buicks around real fast.

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

What was your first car?

[Ron Capps]

Toyota Tacoma.

[John Holmberg]

And you were going like 95 and go woo hoo yee haw all through San Luis Obispo and the need for speed. Like a cowboy hat. And then. And then. Yeah. I don't get the accent that's throwing me off.

[Ron Capps]

I didn't know I had an accent.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh my gosh.

[Brett Vesely]

You can definitely hear it.

[John Holmberg]

Yes. We're driving around over there with peso robles. Like what?

[Brady Bogan]

There's a wrench in your hand.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

You need.

[Ron Capps]

I think I need a cowboy hat when I come to this race.

[John Holmberg]

Next time. I think that's it. Yeah. We out there. Look at Sam Simeon. That's Sam Simeon. They got that castle crazy. Anyway. So that's crazy that you're just now starting this.

[Ron Capps]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

And is. Is this human trafficking or you wanting to do this? Is cats kidnapping.

[Brady Bogan]

Something was going on.

[John Holmberg]

Cuz this doesn't seem like you shouldn't even have the uniform yet. And here you are talking about the races.

[Brady Bogan]

I thought she said Ron bought me eight years ago.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's what I'm hearing. You're from San Luis Obispo now. Drop the hillbilly nonsense. I can't trunk around. Don't call me that.

[Brady Bogan]

She's in trouble after this.

[John Holmberg]

I told you.

[Brady Bogan]

Too heavy with the accent.

[John Holmberg]

Jesus Christ. They're going to know you're from Tennessee. Out. Now we got Nancy Guthrie in the back of the car too. What's going on? Is that too far? Anyway?

[Wayne]

Little too soon.

[John Holmberg]

Is it too soon? I got to find her first. I get you anyway. So you're not really a race car driver yet?

[Ron Capps]

Well, I've been a race car driver since I was 8 years old. But I'm a new Top Fuel driver.

[John Holmberg]

I mean I've been a professional baseball player since I was like seven. But I haven't done it yet.

[Ron Capps]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

So you're going to get in your fuel first race. He like in the next, like this year.

[Brady Bogan]

So did you go to the different levels, like pro stock or just right to top Fuel?

[Ron Capps]

Yeah, so I went junior dragsters for 10 years, went into super comp for about a year. Alcohol funny car for two years and then now top fuel.

[Wayne]

She drove her dad's alcohol funny car, which the cars like mine, but they go 260, 270. Her dad won a world championship in that same car. And then he got out of the seat and put her in a couple years ago. And ironically I signed her license off in Mexico, Minnesota in that funny car. So she jumped right into a 270 mile an hour funny car. And she's very mechanical. Like I watched them grow up.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, she does not funny, is she? AI, yeah, she's robotic.

[Wayne]

But she, she works on the car, builds a clutch. Her and her sister build the whole race car pretty much.

[John Holmberg]

Amazing.

[Wayne]

So her dad is now back in the seat, but when we hired her, we built a team around her.

[John Holmberg]

Awesome.

[Wayne]

And so Carlisle Tools came on board and she got her license upgrade. And so we kick off the season at the Gator Nationals in Florida next week. And then we come here.

[John Holmberg]

What a story.

[Wayne]

March 20th.

[John Holmberg]

Ye this is. I'm so happy for you and I don't know you at all, but this is so cool that you just get to plop down in this thing right away. And were you friends with her dad?

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And so you guys.

[Wayne]

Her grandfather actually raced a funny car back when I was a kid.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding.

[Wayne]

You know, my dad raced and so I would see your grandpa and then her dad at the time was a little younger than me, but he was a little kid running around the pit area. So.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Wayne]

Yeah, I've known him forever.

[John Holmberg]

What a story. So then you've known the whole family for a long time. You kidnap her, take her away from the family, plop her down in a car. And I was waiting for somebody. No kidding. I'm literally floored that this is how this progression has occurred.

[Brady Bogan]

You hop in and you go at 260.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's crazy.

[Wayne]

Well, you got to get the. They got to come out and touch your race car and touch the engine. These guys. Good luck. Every time they do it.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll do that.

[John Holmberg]

That's true.

[Ron Capps]

Guys got to come out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Ron's always asking us to touch stuff. Is he doing the same Wink at me, wink at me. If that's a thing, just do it. Just.

[Brady Bogan]

It's okay.

[John Holmberg]

It's okay. Because he did it with Hagen for a while, too.

[Brady Bogan]

Then Hagen got huge.

[John Holmberg]

Then Hagen quit, and he started. Started working out.

[Brady Bogan]

He's like, no more touch. And I worked out.

[John Holmberg]

I worked out with Hagen once, and he goes, never again. Every curl. Never again, Ron. Every curl.

[Ron Capps]

He warned me about you guys.

[John Holmberg]

Now I know why. Telling you it's scary.

[Wayne]

Hagen did or they did.

[John Holmberg]

This is so cool. Good for you. And do you golf?

[Ron Capps]

Do I golf? Yeah, I can golf.

[John Holmberg]

You can golf. That was the question. Golf.

[Ron Capps]

Am I good?

[John Holmberg]

Ask your owner. Is she allowed to go? She loved Answer that. Heck, back home in Tennessee, it's a bispo.

[Ron Capps]

We used to golf all the time back in Tennessee.

[John Holmberg]

We don't golf off there now. Come on back. Yeah. Oh, this is cool. All right, so now we're rooting for you. How old are you?

[Ron Capps]

21.

[John Holmberg]

Jesus Christ. This is too soon.

[Brady Bogan]

And so your sister is on the team, too?

[Ron Capps]

No, she's on my family's team. She builds all the short blocks for my dad's car. So if she left there, we'd be in big trouble.

[Wayne]

You'd walk in their pit area, and these two little girls are building the race car. It was crazy to walk in there for people. People to see that. And then she jumps in it and goes. 270.

[John Holmberg]

All right, that's incredible. That's. That's a story right there. All right. Maddie Gordon has joined us with Ron Capps. The great Ron Cap.

[Wayne]

Yeah, I'm here, too.

[John Holmberg]

You're here as well.

[Wayne]

It's been that way all morning. We got to the. The tv. The first TV student even want me. They just took her and she's.

[Brady Bogan]

I.

[John Holmberg]

Can you put your helmet on? That's all people want from you.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, you're better off. Just come in with a helmet.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, just wear the helmets. Go, vroom, vroom. And then. Who's that? No, this is. This is a good move. Like, this is, like. This is, like, what an incredible story. Like, that is so great. And very rarely does somebody get a chance to be part of the championship team as well, which is really cool.

[Ron Capps]

Yes. No, it is. It's. It's beyond a dream, you know, this was never something that I thought was in the cards for me. They say shoot for the stars. This was like outer space.

[Brady Bogan]

And it happened quick.

[Ron Capps]

It happened, man. It was the middle of my rookie season when Ron approached my dad and asked, hey, would she.

[John Holmberg]

How much for that one? You guys, I know where to go with this. Back to Dollywood. I know. Morning sickness, medicate, Kupd It's John Holberg here from the morning sickness and I'm sitting with shane orlando from orlandoautobody.com you see somebody with a dinged up car and you kind of feel like, why don't you get that fixed? What do you find is the reason most people don't come to you and get their car fixed when it needs to be fixed? When finances tighten up like they are lately for a lot of people. So what we offer now is 100 days, same as cash on your deductible. We can finance that for you to help you out.

[Josh Blue]

So we're happy to help those people.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You got systems in place? Absolutely.

[Josh Blue]

We've been through this a few times in the last 38 years.

[John Holmberg]

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[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. If you weren't doing this, would you be doing.

[Ron Capps]

I don't know that I want to answer that. You guys are going to spin it.

[John Holmberg]

Do you think if there. If racing wasn't in the cards that you. What would you do? Did you go to college? You don't need college college.

[Ron Capps]

No, I actually, my sister and I started a manufacturing company. I was 15 and she was 13.

[John Holmberg]

What are you making?

[Ron Capps]

Anything metal. 10 foot racks to a little trinket? No, kid lathe parts.

[Wayne]

She welds better than most guys on the team.

[John Holmberg]

Better than me. I can't do it at all.

[Brady Bogan]

Opening those direct mail pieces and there you are hanging on garage racks.

[John Holmberg]

Wow, that's amazing.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[Wayne]

Follow her Instagram and go back and you'll see her welding and in the shop building stuff. It's pretty wild.

[John Holmberg]

No, that sounds boring. When you say watch this girl on Instagram, watch her make a bead. I'm gonna go to AI and watch other things on Instagram. Chick welding. That sounds terrible.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And most of them, when you think of that, it's like flat. Is it flash dance? You know the movie flash dance? No, no. She, she wanted to weld or Dance. But she. She was a welder. Oh, yeah, about that. Yeah, she was a welder. And there's. You can't dance. You're a welder. And then she became a dancer just dancing with dry.

[Brady Bogan]

She's a good welder, too.

[John Holmberg]

How about that?

[Wayne]

Bring up movies to her all the time and she had no idea.

[John Holmberg]

What terrible. They don't know anything. Yeah, she just says Frozen references. You say low key constantly, right? Oh, Loki. That was a good race, but low key. I want some fries. I get up with some fries.

[Brady Bogan]

Loki, you want to watch Frozen?

[John Holmberg]

I can. Lowkey, go.

[Brady Bogan]

Surprise.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Does she say stuff like that? Oh, nice job, Ron. That was perf.

[Brady Bogan]

Perf.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah. How's that? That's it.

[Wayne]

I got a nice drip this morning when I walked out.

[John Holmberg]

Caps, would you take. Would you cut 10 years off of your life for $10 million?

[Wayne]

Is that the morning question?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I popped up and it's on my brain. No, you wouldn't.

[Wayne]

No.

[John Holmberg]

All right, well, that's how well Caps is doing.

[Wayne]

I didn't think I'd make it this far.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, you said sometimes.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm telling you, two years ago, that would have been different.

[John Holmberg]

Me, before all the championships, like 10 million. You got to boost that number a little bit. It's. Maddie, would you. You're young, 10 years off your life expectancy, you get $10 million right now. You're one of those people who wants to live a long time.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[Ron Capps]

I'm gonna say no. No. I'm gonna say no.

[John Holmberg]

That's dumb.

[Brett Vesely]

What was the other one, though? 10 million for one.

[John Holmberg]

If you had 10 years left, guaranteed. But they'll give you $10 million and they cut 10 years off, but you get one year with 10 million bucks to do whatever you want. Oh, no, you wouldn't. You'd live the 10 years broke.

[Ron Capps]

Yeah, broke, probably.

[John Holmberg]

Well, nobody's gonna invest in you if you're gonna die. Hey, Ron, I have an idea. Did you. I don't know if you heard earlier, Josh Blue, the Comedian was here and he's got cerebral palsy. And I hike Camelback Mountain with him and stuff once because he wanted to hike. Kill him in trail. And I'm like, you're an idiot. You hike that with me and then we'll talk. And it took six hours to hike. That takes an hour and 10 minutes normally. So Josh and I were on this thing and.

[Brady Bogan]

And he.

[John Holmberg]

And he put it. He came up with the idea of Palsy on Ice, where people with palsy race. And I'm frankly, tired of handicapped people saying, oh, we can do whatever you can. No, you can't. And so we put this. We put a game, and you came to mind. We put a movie or like a TV show together, proving to people with palsy that they need to shut up about that hole. We can do it. And we put them behind the race car. Oh, and say, all right, punch it. You think you can do everything we can do.

[Brady Bogan]

Punch it.

[John Holmberg]

Maddie makes a run. Bam. 280. And comes out like that. And. All right, Paul. Paulsy beat that. And they say, you can't even do what she did. And she's brand new. And then we. And then make them, like, ice skate.

[Wayne]

What would you call that? You get a name?

[Brady Bogan]

Well, we had.

[John Holmberg]

Stop being so proud of yourself. You're a wreck. Don't act like we don't notice that kind of thing. Josh would do it. He'd be all over that. Oh, yeah, he would. You know, he has people that said, I can do anything you can do, like, no. And then I would just, like, run to my car or I'd, like, run up the stairs.

[Brady Bogan]

The LA race. We have to run.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I would just be like, all right,

[Wayne]

give me two laps down before he gets out.

[John Holmberg]

I'm going to show you that you can't. And it's not my fault, but quiet down. And then I just haul ass to my car, and then I drive my car. He can't even do that. Anyway, it's a different story.

[Brady Bogan]

I told you, Maddie, it's worth it for one season. We're not going to re up the second season.

[John Holmberg]

Well, no, it would be. Look, it would go viral. And I would play the role of the guy who tired of hearing from, like, blind people who climb things. I'm like, remember, you know how they always have blind people that are like, we'll climb Mount Everest. And I'm like, just take them to Camelback.

[Brady Bogan]

They won't know.

[John Holmberg]

And then march them up and down for, like, two days.

[Brady Bogan]

You gotta. It's kind of cold, you know, just

[John Holmberg]

drop the temperature down. Just say, they're going through a heat spell. They're not gonna. You fly them around for 15 hours and you land in Phoenix. Anyway, it's nice to meet you, Maddie. It's not. And you guys want to do the entertainment drill with us? Yeah, Caps, what do you got for us? What's. What's on the brain for Ron? Caps, you always come in here and say, how's. How's the year gonna look? What are we good?

[Wayne]

A good test Everything went good.

[John Holmberg]

Testing in this weather?

[Wayne]

You guys, we didn't test here. Test in Florida last week.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. What are you doing here?

[Wayne]

Just media pumping the race. Came to see you guys.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's what we love. Yeah, but you didn't see us first. Or the longest.

[Wayne]

You guys wouldn't see us first.

[John Holmberg]

That's not true.

[Wayne]

I. I know. This is the prime time right before you're out there.

[John Holmberg]

So you show up to the party right before it closes so you can leave.

[Wayne]

Oh, yeah, maybe.

[John Holmberg]

That's actually pretty smart. Maddie learned from him. He's good.

[Ron Capps]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Very good. Now, do you think someday the queen will capture the trophy from like the. The student will become the teacher? You want to beat Ron Capps eventually and have your own team?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Well, you run him off the track.

[Ron Capps]

I can't say anything, but it'd be pretty cool to run Ron Capps at some point.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know what that means. Maybe.

[Wayne]

Maybe we're in different categories.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no. But eventually, her goal, your goal is to get like, somewhere where he is. But you're running a different car. Computer.

[Ron Capps]

We're in like the same level, but just different categories. So dragster versus funny car. We'll never race against each other.

[John Holmberg]

Let's do that anyway.

[Ron Capps]

Let's do.

[John Holmberg]

Let's switch over to what he's doing. Oh, and let's take the crown.

[Ron Capps]

I mean, let's just race against each other.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's what I mean. You think you could beat him now?

[Ron Capps]

Actually, well, drags go faster, so maybe all things Penny.

[John Holmberg]

Thank you. Here we go.

[Wayne]

Thank you.

[John Holmberg]

She just told what, a three time world world champion now? I have not gone faster.

[Ron Capps]

But dragsters typically go a little faster.

[John Holmberg]

Pipe it. You just told the three time world champion with a hesitation. Your voice. We'll see.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm already burying you.

[John Holmberg]

It's like Today at age 21, she looked at you and said, ah, I could probably take him. Yeah. Here and there.

[Brady Bogan]

His car is cute.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, his car's adorable. And you're gonna.

[Wayne]

I remember I had my first beer.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, exactly.

[Josh Blue]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

Watch this. Could she even come close to touching you on the track?

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

What? She could beat you in a race.

[Wayne]

She's a badass.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I know she's a badass, but she could. You'd think she'd do it.

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

So somebody who's four weeks into this can take over.

[Wayne]

We started to build this team. Usually, you know, every F1, all this. These, they have wealthy parents who bring millions of dollars to get a ride driving.

[Brady Bogan]

Right.

[Wayne]

Nascar it's always like that. We built a team around her. No money, so I built it that way. And I was even willing to get out of my car and put her in mine if we didn't have a chance to have another team. Top Fuel, Dragster. So I think she.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I. I got do. That's pretty awesome. He's even saying that because he. In his brain, he's like, no effing. But he's being all politically correct and stuff.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

He would destroy you. It wouldn't even be close. And he knows.

[Wayne]

Maybe. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

How's the one ball?

[Brady Bogan]

Good.

[John Holmberg]

We're attacked. We're good.

[Wayne]

We're good.

[Brady Bogan]

She puts the ear muffs on.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Wayne]

It's just hanging around.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's just what it does. All right, Brady, give them stories, and let's do the entertainment drill. It's broadcast. I got a story about my eye you're going to love.

[Wayne]

I saw the picture.

[John Holmberg]

Did you see it? Horrifying, isn't it, how I look? Yeah. Well, because. Well, I'm through the. The major part. I've got a gas. I keep saying it, but I got a gas bubble floating around in my eye right now. So if I do this to you. Because I've got water, basically, inside.

[Brady Bogan]

It's like a Magic 8 ball.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Is it? I was at.

[Wayne]

The picture was gnarly.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's gross. That was after the surgery. But I. I was at a steakhouse last night, and across from my table was an man from India, and he's cutting his. And I guess I was. I was winking at him the whole time. Didn't realize. And he just stopped cutting it. And I was like, well, you shouldn't be here anyway, because this is cow.

[Wayne]

He was a Pink Panther fan. Hector Cluso over there.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. Twitching like, what are you doing here? That's. You can't eat that. That's against everything you believe in. He had a steak. He's just carving it up, and he just put his knife and fork down and looked at me like, what are you looking at? I'm like, oh, jeez.

[Brady Bogan]

What's your problem, man?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I'm winking at that. That guy for an hour.

[Wayne]

Double agent.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. So the entertainment drill is brought to you by Dr. Jay Schwartz and the Schwartz laser eye team over there. That. That center is unbelievable. And I tell you, that. Complimentary consultation. You got floaties in your eyes at all? I do.

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Go get checked.

[Wayne]

I know I've gotten checked.

[John Holmberg]

I tore my retina.

[Wayne]

It's a Negative G forces when the shoots open.

[John Holmberg]

Can't imagine.

[Wayne]

And so I have them a little more. And I've had a doctor tell me eventually I'm gonna have. When I get older, I'm gonna have surgery for them.

[John Holmberg]

Don't wait for the, for the retinal. I'm gonna come.

[Wayne]

When we come back for the race, I want to make an appointment.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Oh, look, we're already.

[Wayne]

You set me up?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. Complimentary consultation. Get it looked at. Because it's not so much that it hurts or anything, because it doesn't. You have to stay face down for seven days, 24 hours. Oh, try that. Try laying down for, like an hour. Face. Yeah. For how long? Seven days? Well, actually five plus one if it's not, like, quite better. And it was. Yeah, it was. Was horrible.

[Wayne]

You know, Big daddy Don Garlas retired because the retinas peeled off from the parachute setting.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, is that real? Yeah.

[Wayne]

Swear to God.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. I used to watch him when he was railing the tower.

[John Holmberg]

The one time some kid walked up, said, daddy, Garlic, I remember you back when you were relevant. And he put his arm around it

[Brady Bogan]

as a compliment, but, like.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And garlic's went, what? And then they took the picture. That's exactly how that went down. Anyway, the Dr. J. Schwartz will take carry. And if you're even seeing floaties or concerned, just get your eyes checked. When's the last time you got your eyes checked? Dr. J will handle that. Not that Dr. J. Dr. J. Sch. Words. If Dr. J comes in like, I'm leaving, this is not a professional. But he'll dunk on your eyes is what I'm saying. You go to Schwartz Laser Eye center, get that complimentary consultation and make sure you don't have to do the crap. I, I, I'm like Jesus of eyeballs. I went through it, so you didn't have to. And now I'm warning you how to avoid this thing. Schwarz Laser eye Center. It's teamidoc.com Brady. Entertain me with your friends.

[Brady Bogan]

Amanda Seyfried wore a prosthetic butthole for one of her recent movies.

[John Holmberg]

We'll be right back.

[Brady Bogan]

It wasn't for the housemates either. It was for a movie that came out on Christmas Day, the Testament of Ann Lee. And at the end of the movie, she says she's standing there in front of a burning building and just with a merkin on the front and the backside. But they put a prosthetic.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they covered it and then they anchored it in.

[Brady Bogan]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Wow. You have to do that during racing at all. Yeah, no, you should think about it.

[Ron Capps]

Did you just say not yet?

[John Holmberg]

Not yet. Well, you never know. He's getting older and sometimes you lose.

[Brady Bogan]

Maddie, do you pack your own shoots?

[John Holmberg]

So what does that mean?

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, I see.

[John Holmberg]

Brady.

[Ron Capps]

Yes, I do.

[John Holmberg]

Maddie Gordon at Instagram, you can watch a Weld and Packer shoot. Yeah. Oh, God. By the way, the 10 o' clock word is Rome Roam for the Metallic. We'll tell you about that too, Ron. Yeah, yeah. We're doing a B52s concert. We're giving it Metallica at Sphere. It's pretty awesome.

[Brady Bogan]

There's a rundown of actors who have had a hit on the Billboard Hot 100. You could probably name a couple.

[John Holmberg]

Patrick Swayze.

[Brady Bogan]

He did.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. She's like that.

[Brady Bogan]

Reached number three in 1987.

[Brett Vesely]

JLo.

[John Holmberg]

Who? Don Johnson.

[Brady Bogan]

Nice one. Heartbeat. That was the. Peaked at number five in 1986.

[John Holmberg]

John Travolta. Oh, the dude from Starsky and Hutch?

[Brett Vesely]

Not on.

[Brady Bogan]

He's. Yeah, he's not on this list. In the.

[Wayne]

The ones that I. Duke's a hazard guy. What's his name?

[John Holmberg]

That's Waylon J. Oh. Tom Wopat had some singing and John Schneider did. But that was that terrible country music that she listened to when she was growing up. There you go in the hills.

[Brady Bogan]

Party all the time. Number two in 1985, Bruce Willis did Respect Yourself.

[Brett Vesely]

Terrible.

[Brady Bogan]

Jimmy Fallon Will. I Am. I didn't know this. They did that.

[John Holmberg]

Even more terrible. What kind of music do you listen to, Maddie?

[Ron Capps]

Country.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, good Lord.

[Ron Capps]

I'm from Kentucky, man.

[John Holmberg]

I know. I know you are. Hell, yeah, we all know that. I saw it when you walked in with that barrel with three X's on.

[Ron Capps]

That's right.

[John Holmberg]

That's right.

[Ron Capps]

I rode in here on my horse.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you're running shine all through this. She's driving fast. We could get her on the.

[Brady Bogan]

How many artificial teeth do you have?

[John Holmberg]

Can you pop them out? Are you engaged to your brother or just talking like most people from San Luis. Oh, my God. What high school did you go to?

[Ron Capps]

Tampleton.

[John Holmberg]

Tampleton and Slo. Shoot, shoot. That was there, too. The accent is weird. Does her dad have an accent?

[Wayne]

No, I don't think so. No.

[Ron Capps]

I didn't know I had one.

[Brady Bogan]

How about Mama?

[John Holmberg]

Mama got an accent?

[Wayne]

No, she got Squeeze Box.

[John Holmberg]

She got Squeeze Box on that porch. What's your favorite food? Possum.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. When she started talking, I'm like, that's a heavy accent.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, definitely Southern.

[Wayne]

Yeah, we've heard that before. Somewhere somebody said the same thing.

[Brady Bogan]

Top. Top, Fuel.

[Josh Blue]

It's the top.

[John Holmberg]

There you go. Yeah. Paso Robles.

[Brady Bogan]

The 2026 Rock hall of Fame nominees have been announced.

[John Holmberg]

What?

[Brady Bogan]

We got the Black Crows, Jeff Buckley, Mariah Carey, Phil Collins. He went in with Genesis.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. He go in solo.

[Brady Bogan]

But this is his.

[John Holmberg]

He'll go in.

[Brady Bogan]

Billy Idol in Excess. Iron Maiden again. Troy Division, sl, New Order. What? New Edition.

[John Holmberg]

New Edition, they had a run. Oasis will get in, but right off the bat.

[Brady Bogan]

So if New Edition goes in, is that everyone?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. What do you mean?

[Brady Bogan]

Like Johnny Gill?

[John Holmberg]

And why would you kick a few out?

[Brett Vesely]

Well, because there were a couple of them replaced.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Still, they were part of it.

[Brett Vesely]

No, I agree.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, like, the Foo Fighters and Pearl Jam went in and all the guys were up there.

[Brady Bogan]

Luther Vandross. Heck, I figured he would have been

[John Holmberg]

in, but no kidding. You don't know who any of these people are, do you?

[Ron Capps]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Not one of Bluetooth, Wu Tang Clan. You know the Wu Tang Nothing. And you just like country music?

[Brady Bogan]

Pink.

[Ron Capps]

I know Pink.

[Brady Bogan]

Okay.

[Ron Capps]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

You don't care for anything other than country music?

[Josh Blue]

No.

[Ron Capps]

Like, I'll listen to, like, some, like. Like three Doors Down. Like.

[John Holmberg]

All right. You don't have to appease us. Just.

[Ron Capps]

I was just making a staging lane playlist, and 3 Doors down was on there.

[John Holmberg]

How about that? What's on your playlist?

[Wayne]

Motorhead.

[John Holmberg]

Nice.

[Wayne]

Mud van.

[John Holmberg]

Yes.

[Brady Bogan]

Pennywise.

[Wayne]

Cedar. Pennywise. There you go.

[John Holmberg]

Good stuff. That's. That's a solid list right there. And you've got, like, show me your fish and caps.

[Brady Bogan]

Was the one who brought me cedar. Yeah.

[Wayne]

That was fun. This is.

[John Holmberg]

This is what country music sounds like to people who hate it all. I. I think it's for mental.

[Wayne]

Somebody just turned the radio to the.

[John Holmberg]

Your dial, and they was on.

[Wayne]

They were like.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I feel like. Pretty sure it's for people who have brain damage. Just saying. But you'll get over it. You're young.

[Josh Blue]

Okay.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll heal.

[Josh Blue]

I'll heal.

[Ron Capps]

Yeah, everyone's got a bad face.

[John Holmberg]

One good shoot pull, and you should, like, knock that right out of you. That's right.

[Ron Capps]

Gone.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You guys don't run today. You're running. You tested in Florida, so everything goes. How does that work?

[Wayne]

We go back home, and then we go next week.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Wayne]

Embrace the following weekend.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Wayne]

Then we come here a couple weeks after March 20th.

[John Holmberg]

Right. End of March.

[Wayne]

We'll be here all week. Actually, we're doing some other stuff, so hope we can come in and do Guadalupe squares tomorrow.

[John Holmberg]

You want to come back? Oh, next time.

[Wayne]

Next time.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you're here the whole week when you're here. Yeah. Okay. You're always welcome. Yeah, by all means, come in. It'll be easy. That's great. And you can make requests and all that stuff. Except for you.

[Wayne]

I told you. You do a great. John Forrest slash Gary Busey.

[John Holmberg]

It's the same thing. I'll give it to. I'll give it to you in March if you come back. If you make it. If you're not.

[Ron Capps]

Fired me up for all these. I was.

[Brady Bogan]

You have to be. You have to make it to a couple of Sundays.

[Ron Capps]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Look at her confidence, just oozing. All right, well, thanks for coming in. And tickets are available always through nhra.com nhra.com and track's good. You guys don't get to run today. And it's gonna be hot.

[Wayne]

You're gonna be out the race this year.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, I'm going. This. I was. I was actually worried that it was. That you were doing stuff this weekend when coming because I don't know if I can handle the.

[Wayne]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

The bubble might pop.

[Wayne]

Good call.

[Ron Capps]

You gotta toughen up.

[John Holmberg]

Calm down. I will. I literally. I will. I will strike you. I'm not afraid of it.

[Wayne]

Long arms.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Well, thanks for coming. It's nice to meet you. Good luck to you and your whole careers ahead of you.

[Ron Capps]

Thank you.

[Brett Vesely]

That's great.

[John Holmberg]

Ron. Yours is mostly behind you, but you've done very well.

[Brady Bogan]

Thank you. I liked you when you were relevant.

[John Holmberg]

I like Ron Cast back there. That's good. And anything else you want to promote or plug, throw it out there. Nothing. Napa Racing, of course.

[Brady Bogan]

Carlile.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. What else? Anything. What do you. Do you have anything to sell?

[Ron Capps]

Maddie Carlisle. Right there.

[John Holmberg]

Right there. That's it. See? She's good, I guess. Sort of. Anyway, Ron, you get. You can learn from her.

[Wayne]

I know.

[John Holmberg]

Trust me. It's always Loki. Great day coming.

[Brady Bogan]

Wasn't there a series that the finale was.

[Wayne]

Yeah, she was on it last night.

[John Holmberg]

It's on.

[Wayne]

Yeah, it's on Vice TV, YouTube page today.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Wayne]

They got 4 million followers or something, but.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, go on.

[Wayne]

And they actually had her pretty prominent.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Wayne]

So we haven't seen it yet. We were getting phone calls last night.

[John Holmberg]

Fantastic.

[Wayne]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Awesome. Well, I'm rooting for you. That's a cool story. You should be happy for yourself and be very proud because that's a big deal. That's pretty neat.

[Brady Bogan]

Lose the accent. Next time.

[John Holmberg]

Next time you come here, Charlie, to try to bone up on sounding like where Ron tells you you're from, the only thing you did terrible today is the human trafficking was glowing. Oh my gosh.

[Brady Bogan]

Did you come in with an English accent?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Next, yeah, I'll be rehearsing. The word for ten o' clock is Rome. R o am. We're all done. Ron caps is a pleasure as always. Matty Gordon, the future of racing sitting right here with us. And we're out. We'll catch you guys tomorrow right here in the morning sickness all out powerful, powerful rock radio station. It's John Holmerg here from the morning sickness and I'm talking with my friend Shane Orlando from Orlando auto body. Here we are staring at a brand new year. You know what I just found out from insurance? They used to have low mileage cars. They don't do that anymore. And if you have a low mileage car deal with your insurance, it's more money when you hit somebody. Well, insurance has gotten a little wacky over the last couple years. So always shop your insurance.

[Josh Blue]

That's a good time to do that

[John Holmberg]

every new year if you haven't done

[Josh Blue]

it in a while, shop your insurance.

[John Holmberg]

Call us if you need help with that. We've got great agents. We can refer you to orlandoautobody.com that's where you go. Come on down to the Ranch House grill. Comfort food is your next meal. Pork chili verde, chicken fried steak. Ranch House knows you'll think it's great. Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House grill has been voted best breakfast four years in a row. We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions. Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven days a week, 6am to 2p pm. We're a family restaurant with a small town atmosphere serving southwestern comfort food for 18 years. Come on down to the Ranch House grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix. At 56th street and Thomas road.