Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: March 3, 2025
Title: It's Natl Cold Cuts Day And Bret's Favorites - Eyeglass Store Worker Lured Customers w/Offers Of Sex - BV Of Karate Match Between 22yo Woman And Male Karate Champ
Release Date: March 3, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Introduction
In this energetic episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD, host John Holmberg teams up with co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo to deliver a rollercoaster of discussions ranging from daily life anecdotes to bizarre news stories. The show seamlessly blends humor, shock value, and insightful commentary, ensuring listeners are both entertained and informed throughout their morning commute.
Opening Monologue and Listener Stories (00:35 - 04:35)
John Holmberg kicks off the show with his signature blend of humor and candidness. He discusses receiving an email on the 35th anniversary of a traumatic event, sharing a listener’s story about overcoming a past gang rape trauma. Holmberg delivers a poignant message intertwined with his typical irreverent style.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (02:15): "It's hard to win Human of the Year because so many good people have won it. And also John J. But I want it."
Holmberg continues by recounting his experience at a baseball game, making sharp observations about wasted opportunities and unused resources, setting the tone for a show filled with candid and sometimes controversial topics.
Brady Report Sponsored by All Pro Shade (04:35 - 08:35)
The Brady Report, hosted by Brady Bogen, provides local news with a twist. Sponsored by All Pro Shade Concepts, Brady highlights the importance of outdoor shade solutions in Arizona's intense climate. The segment blends promotional content with practical advice, emphasizing the company's expertise in creating comfortable outdoor living spaces.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (07:07): "If you like staying in the dark, then by all means listen to the Brady Report brought to you by All Pro Shade."
Brady then transitions to share quirky news facts, including NASA's observation of the Las Vegas Strip as the brightest spot on Earth from space and a brief dive into Samuel L. Jackson's Oscar nominations.
National Cold Cuts Day Segment (05:19 - 07:07)
In celebration of National Cold Cuts Day, the hosts engage in a lively discussion about their favorite deli meats. The conversation delves into the nuances of different cold cuts, with light-hearted debates over terms like "baloney" and "prosciutto."
Notable Quote:
Brady (06:07): "Salami. Of course. Yeah."
The segment showcases the hosts' chemistry and ability to turn even mundane topics into engaging banter, keeping listeners entertained with their witty exchanges.
Eyeglass Store Worker Lured Customers for Sex (13:06 - 15:05)
The hosts shift to a disturbing news story about Brian Steiner, an employee at two optical shops in Pennsylvania, who was charged with multiple counts of sexual assault. Steiner reportedly lured customers back by offering free glasses in exchange for sexual acts.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (14:12): "If you're walking around in free glasses and it happened to you, you got something to give them back, you got no beef."
The discussion navigates the ethical and legal implications of Steiner's actions, with the hosts dissecting the details and expressing their outrage over such manipulative behavior.
Fashion Trends: Plumber's Crack from Milan Fashion Week (19:43 - 22:50)
Brady introduces a bizarre fashion trend emerging from Milan Fashion Week: the deliberate showcasing of plumber's crack in extremely low-cut jeans by Diesel. The hosts humorously critique the trend, juxtaposing high fashion with everyday practicality.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (20:07): "You better work it, girl. That's what I'm saying. But the rest of them, let's tug them up to your chest."
Holmberg extends the conversation to the average person’s reluctance to adopt such trends, adding a layer of social commentary on fashion's influence over everyday attire.
Florida Man Games Coverage (21:45 - 24:10)
The discussion moves to the Florida Man Games, highlighting eccentric events like evading arrest obstacle courses and alligator-throwing competitions. The hosts revel in the absurdity, painting a vivid picture of the games' chaotic and humorous nature.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (22:08): "Throw a real alligator."
The segment underscores Florida's reputation for oddball news, with the hosts playfully critiquing the spectacle and safety of such events.
Window Washing Accident in High Winds (25:28 - 26:40)
Brady reports on a harrowing incident where two window washers were trapped by high winds, leading to shattered windows and a dangerous predicament. The hosts express concern over the safety measures in place for such professions.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (25:03): "You've got to have a better plan than this. The high wind factor blowing into the building."
The conversation pivots to innovative ideas for safer window cleaning methods, blending serious concern with creative brainstorming.
Gymnastics Parallel Bar Incident (26:58 - 28:16)
The hosts discuss a troubling gymnastics video where a gymnast's oversight leads to a near-accident on the parallel bars. The segment highlights the importance of safety and focus in sports, with the hosts offering both critique and support for athleticism.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (27:08): "This guy steps over. Oh, my God. What did you say?"
Their analysis balances humor with genuine concern, reflecting on the pressures athletes face during performances.
Historic Karate Match: Joe Hess vs. Beth Bussey (28:27 - 34:35)
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to a retrospective discussion of a 1974 karate match between Joe Hess and Beth Bussey. The hosts dissect the fight, highlighting the gender dynamics and the physicality involved.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (29:13): "Do it. It's a hell of a kick, Joe. All that training paid off."
Holmberg voices discomfort over the violent nature of the match, questioning the ethics of pitting men against women in such combative settings. The conversation delves into societal changes since the 1970s, touching upon evolving perceptions of gender roles in sports.
Dashcam Video Reports (35:26 - 37:01)
The hosts review various dashcam videos capturing unusual and often dangerous driving incidents. From near-miss collisions to bewildering traffic patterns, the segment highlights the chaos on the roads.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (36:58): "I'm looking at that. Okay, I see it now."
Their reactions range from amusement to concern, providing entertaining yet cautionary tales about driving behaviors.
Closing Segments and Sponsor Plugs (38:35 - 40:37)
As the show wraps up, the hosts transition into humorous segments featuring bizarre advertisements and satirical takes on everyday scenarios. A standout moment includes a parody of "Breakfast of Champions," where cereal is inappropriately used, blending absurdity with sharp wit.
Notable Quote:
John Holmberg (39:00): "It's called man versus woman. Best bussy. And I mean Joe is not playing."
The episode concludes with reminders about the show's sponsor, All Pro Shade Concepts, seamlessly integrating promotional content with the show's trademark humor.
Conclusion
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully balances humor, shock value, and insightful commentary. From celebrating National Cold Cuts Day to discussing disturbing news stories and bizarre fashion trends, John Holmberg and his co-hosts deliver a captivating and diverse array of topics. Their dynamic interactions and candid discussions ensure that listeners are thoroughly entertained while being kept informed about the oddities of daily life in Arizona and beyond.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
- John Holmberg (02:15): "It's hard to win Human of the Year because so many good people have won it. And also John J. But I want it."
- John Holmberg (07:07): "If you like staying in the dark, then by all means listen to the Brady Report brought to you by All Pro Shade."
- John Holmberg (14:12): "If you're walking around in free glasses and it happened to you, you got something to give them back, you got no beef."
- John Holmberg (20:07): "You better work it, girl. That's what I'm saying. But the rest of them, let's tug them up to your chest."
- John Holmberg (25:03): "You've got to have a better plan than this. The high wind factor blowing into the building."
- John Holmberg (28:27): "Do it. It's a hell of a kick, Joe. All that training paid off."
- John Holmberg (36:58): "I'm looking at that. Okay, I see it now."
These quotes encapsulate the show's blend of humor, critique, and candid reflection, providing listeners with memorable moments that define the essence of Holmberg's Morning Sickness.