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Brady
Hooters.
Commercial Announcer
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John Holmberg
It's John Holmberg here from the Morning Sickness to tell you about the Core Institute. People who met me found out that I've had four major operations in the last four years. They're blown away. I've had both shoulders replaced and both hips replaced because I was an absolute disaster before my surgeries. I was in pain. Now no one knows I've had any issues. People who hear multiple surgeries assume they'll never be the same again. It's just not true. I'm better than I've been in 20 years. Stop quitting the things you love and get back to being the pain free you you love. Thecoreinstitute.
Radio Station Announcer
Still streaming Homberg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com It's 5:45.
Brady
My name's John. How are you?
John Holmberg
There's Brady, there's Brett.
Brady
There's Big Dick Toledo. That's the morning sickness. And off we go for another glorious day here in paradise. And I gotta. We'll start the whole thing right there. We just played that System of a Down song. And if you're listening on the app, which so many of you are and I believe on the website as well, it'll tell you, click on this right now. It's going to give you a little prompt to say, click. Click here. And every time you do that, you'll hear when you're. When you're. When your app tells you, this one, this one, this one, this one, it'll start warning you. You're going to register yourself for this amazing thing. We're sending you guys to the Sick
John Holmberg
New World festival in Las Vegas April
Brady
25 to see there's 40 bands playing this thing and headlining. System of a, down with Corn, Marilyn Manson, Bring Me the Horizon, Evanescence Pod
John Holmberg
Alien, Ant Farm, Filter.
Brady
Who else? Cypress Hill is on this thing.
John Holmberg
Terror, Terror.
Brady
Danny Elfman, Mastodon. Keep Going Cold Chamber. Who am I missing? There's a billion bands. There's a billion of the Melvins are even on it. I'm looking at this thing right now. It's crazy. Yeah, it's an insane. Evanescence, that I mentioned that pod. Just looking at this thing. It's non stop. Just one after another, after greatness. And every time we play a band that's on the list on the tour of the. The. Not the tour, but the lineup of Sick New World, you can tap that track right there on the KUPD app or web stream. Every time you hear any artist playing a Sick New World festival, there you go. Five of you will win tickets to the show. One of you will win a VIP package hotel and then another 200 bucks gas for the road trip. That's right. The 25th anniversary of this nonsense is going to be in your benefit. Everybody's going to win something. We're all walking away with something. B.
John Holmberg
This, this goes on for a little while.
Brady
We give this prize away and we're
John Holmberg
only like three weeks away from Easter and this year's Easter keg, if I'm not mistaken.
Brady
Five grand. My, that is a huge prize this year.
Rodney
Huge.
Brady
So it's. Yeah, we got ourselves. We got ourselves quite a 25th year. There's no chop in there, Nothing. Well, you know what started putting people on the. On the, you know, on the ball and saying, you know, easy this would
John Holmberg
be if you guys tried.
Brady
And the trying started and boom. The next thing you know, it's going to be a beast. Yeah, I mean, they've got this. I'm looking at the clutches out there. Pod, Mastodon, Filter, the Melvin's Coal Chamber, Cypress Hill, afi, Ministry. Danny Elfman is way high on the list. Marilyn Manson, Evanescence. Bring me the horizon Corn. System of a Down. I mean, you're going to be tired of music by the end. Jealous. Yeah, I know. It's going to be amazing. Well, we'll hand you those tickets. And all you have to do is tap that track. So they say interactive listening. You know, that's pretty awesome. It used to be the, you know, ninth caller type crap. Now it's just like that.
John Holmberg
Minimum effort and everybody gets to qualify.
Brady
And then there's some sort of drawing thing.
John Holmberg
I don't know how it works.
Brady
I just know you tap it, you get into some sort of weird database. The algorithm steals all your information. We sell it to foreigners. I'm pretty sure that you get all sorts of ads and possibly your identity stolen.
John Holmberg
But you might win contest stuff.
Freddie
The afternoon, the day.
Brady
Yeah, I do the Metallica one o'. Clock. I got a. Oh, yeah, we'll be doing that. All right. You shouldn't be that excited. And don't fake it, Freddie. It's ugly. Don't do that. But yeah, it's a. Got a lot going on. Awful lot going on. How's your mouth, Gummoe?
Gummoe
Good.
Brady
You get it fixed?
Gummoe
Pretty much.
John Holmberg
You got drained?
Brady
Hell, yeah. Oh, boy.
Gummoe
Oh, man, did I ever.
Brady
Tuning in. Gummoe had an abscess for about a week. Oh, his face was good. Friday was getting weird. Yeah, like, you were like, Bell's palsy swollen.
Gummoe
And I was out of it, too. I just couldn't look. Pain and.
Brady
Yeah, well, I had to have a
Gummoe
root canal on one side and then on the other side, that's when they had to go and drain. So my whole face was numb for, like, the entire day.
Brady
Well, your face was killing us.
Gummoe
Great way to start Friday, too awesome a weekend.
Brady
But it's all good. You got the root canal and everything.
Gummoe
Yeah, yeah. They still have to pull this one tooth on the side, but. But they relieved all the pressure and got it all.
Freddie
Friday was an Italian chipmunk.
Brady
Yeah, it was bad. He had canolies in his cheeks. The. The worst part is, is that I, you know, said you went to the dentist, and you've never heard a dentist
John Holmberg
go, holy, what's going on in here?
Brady
He was horrified. It's his nom.
Gummoe
Well, it's like when they put that. That suction thing in there, and it's usually just, you know, like regular cleaning or whatever and just sucking up the regular spit. This is just. This one was just this.
Brady
Yeah, Brady. It was all pus getting sucked out of Gummoe's head. Oh, gross. So bad.
Gummoe
But I feel so good now.
John Holmberg
You always think about that like.
Brady
Like doctors. I was talking to my buddy, Dr. Brink. He's a surgeon last night. We're basically what we're. Anthony. Our friend Anthony started to talk about anal sex, I think, and he was in, you know, the. The dangers therein with, you know, that's where poop lives. So we're doing that. And. And Anthony is pretty graphically okay with anything. Like, he. He. He doesn't.
Freddie
Like, nothing stuns him.
John Holmberg
So he's just into the. He doesn't care.
Freddie
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Like, the conversation.
Brady
I don't know.
John Holmberg
The. Actually follows him.
Brady
He doesn't care about the gross stuff, you know, like the smells and I don't care. And even Dr. Brink was like, I. I'm a surgeon. Some of the things that have come out of people that I've touched and that the Smells of an infection that are inside. And he goes, it's pretty brutal. And he goes, but even I'm not into the, you know, dirty bottoms. And like, I think our. My friend Anthony would be in one of the videos.
Gummoe
I was just going to say we should show him some of these videos.
Brady
Well, he would.
John Holmberg
That wouldn't bother him at all.
Brady
Seen it, but. Yeah. No, it lived it. Like, lived it. Like, why is. You know, why would I watch that? I lived that.
Gummoe
Like the Bellagio fountain. Yeah.
Brady
The punt and the thing. He's like, whatever that happens. And he goes, you just got to keep. You got to plow through it. And it's gross. Dentists, they think they're just going to go, you know, they get their little dental thing and they're. And then they become sadists because after a while they're bored with just a filling or whatever. They want a gummoe. They want something like you coming in going, oh, this is awesome. But then the smells probably get them all juiced up. And the popping. I mean, popping pus. Oh, the smell of that is so bad. And then pulling your teeth out and watch it. Just being in that kind of control over another human head.
Freddie
Ship it away.
Brady
You got to be a weirdo to want to be a dentist. Dentist and gynecologist.
Gummoe
Gyno, I think, is worse. Just because it's.
John Holmberg
Proctology is just ridiculously bad because, you
Brady
know, it's like you lost a bet.
John Holmberg
It's like, yeah, yeah.
Brady
I'm like, oh, I could have been
John Holmberg
a foot doctor, but I chose buttholes.
Brady
And now I dig around in there for stuff wrong and hopefully I find it. Cause that's a payday. And then you gotta go back into that one that's busted over and over again. Ugh.
Gummoe
Even the prostate checks. And you gotta go up there and.
John Holmberg
Yeah, no, they like it.
Gummoe
Yeah, I know.
Brady
That's why they must.
Freddie
That's why all doctors do that one.
John Holmberg
Yeah, but that's why there's no technology, Brady.
Brady
I have some. You've been raped. If. Then all doctors don't do that. That's. I've never once had a near nose. Oh, man.
John Holmberg
Wow.
Brady
You need a lawyer immediately you need a lawyer. My holistic healer. My Reiki. My Reiki non contact massage. They're all in there.
Freddie
The rug doctor came over.
Brady
No kidding. Well, he's steaming mad at dirt, so you got to give him that. Yeah. Just so weird being a. Anyway, well, good. Gummoe's better. And Brady, you said that your indentured servant Got a little uppity on Friday and you had to put him in his place.
Freddie
He finally heard through a buddy of his. I understand you're talking about me on your radio show.
Brady
Oh, boy.
Freddie
Funny.
Brady
Oh, he was happy with it.
Freddie
Yeah. Yeah.
Rodney
So I thought that was wonderful. You give me all that time. Now, sir. Thank you so much.
Brady
Now, sir.
Rodney
By the way, these are underpants. I assumed they was. Cause they covered in poopy.
Freddie
Now, Rodney.
John Holmberg
Now, Rodney.
Rodney
Yes, Mr. Benny the.
Brady
So he's okay with it.
John Holmberg
Yeah.
Freddie
I tried to explain how we. Yeah, I said it was very funny.
Brady
Yeah. Did you tell.
Freddie
I like to hear so.
John Holmberg
Oh, no. Did you tell him?
House Helper
They just said you were my slave.
Brady
Anyway, you didn't tell him.
John Holmberg
Oh, yeah, you did.
Freddie
Yeah.
Brady
That you sat and watched a. Oh, geez Louise.
Rodney
That's funny. So that's funny.
Brady
He's pissing all over Brady's like, drawers and all that other stuff.
Rodney
How you doing? Now, I understand you've been making fun of me on the radio. We are allowed to listen to radio at work now.
Brady
Now, Rodney Brady has his indentured servant.
John Holmberg
Did you stick around again when he cleaned?
Freddie
No, I came in at the tail. I came home and he was still just finishing up.
Brady
Was he alone?
Freddie
Yep.
Brady
All right. Do you have in house cameras at all? Because I guarantee you to hurt this
Rodney
mother thinks he gonna get away with this. I'm gonna every drawer in this house, wipe all my. All that silverware.
Brady
Is everybody feeling well after the weekend?
Freddie
No.
Brady
Everybody's got a little sickness, don't they? Yeah, that's exactly right. You're terrible. Well, to Rodney, I certainly wouldn't do that to you. I'd answer the door. Go.
Rodney
Hello, I'm here to clean your house.
Brady
Not happening. No, you gotta go do something else. I'm sorry, I can't. I can't do this.
Gummoe
Brady walks in. Look at the wax buildup on those shoes. This is fine leather. I want this stripped off. I want them cleaned and buffed.
Rodney
Boy, you son of a. I swear to God, I will bust your ass. Mother, come over and clean his house.
House Helper
Rodney, look at this.
Rodney
What is it, Mr. Bogan stuff.
House Helper
Why, you cleaned the kitchen. And I went back in and I started to rub a half a ham. How am I supposed to get all this off there but wash the kitchen again, Rodney.
Rodney
Mother. Bitch.
Brady
You hear him saying that all the time walking through the house?
Rodney
Mother. Fat little toe.
Freddie
Are you sure you cleaned that? I did. Okay, then.
Rodney
Here you go, Mr. Bogan. Can I. Can I go?
House Helper
Can I go now? Well, I'm gonna do a white glove
Rodney
inspection, so just use your hand. Without a glove, Mother, you're already white. You already white and get your dirt on your ugly ass.
House Helper
Seems to be reasonable, Rodney. Here's your dollar.
Brady
You flicker coin.
House Helper
You're humble and lovable.
Rodney
Thank you, sir. You're kind.
Brady
You're a terrible person. You should have fired him on the spot.
Freddie
It can be a tough call.
Brady
No, how are you gonna get. How are you gonna do it? You gotta venture.
Rodney
He's not going to.
Brady
He's not. Rodney's gonna live there forever. He's gonna be in Brady's world for the rest of your life.
Gummoe
He's gonna move his family in and everything else.
Brady
And Thomas
Rodney
brought some people to help out.
Freddie
Ronnie, I need you to make a call. Oh, no.
Rodney
This is not good.
House Helper
We're gonna need another house in the back.
Brady
You're done. You're done.
Radio Station Announcer
There's something. Something. Check out homework's morning sickness.
Brady
Po.
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Radio Station Announcer
Homburg's morning sickness.
John Holmberg
Because you can't.
Freddie
You can't too deep into it.
Brady
No, he's gonna just be sitting on
Rodney
the couch drinking, not cleaning anything today, sir.
Freddie
That's great. That's.
House Helper
What are you talking about, Rodney? You gotta clean.
Rodney
I gotta do. You got a slave. I'll turn your ass in. You go to jail, son.
Freddie
It's like JB Smooth.
Brady
Yeah, that's it. He just stays there.
John Holmberg
Oh my God.
Gummoe
Can be parked in his red Mercedes in your garage. You're still going to be parking in the driveway.
Brady
Awesome.
Rodney
His. I found your daughter's stash of weed, sir.
House Helper
Now you put that back, Rodney.
John Holmberg
Kirby hates that.
House Helper
When you break out of her contraband and start moving it around. We found out the hard way Kirby wants it, Kirby gets it.
Rodney
She got some good son. We were smoking in the backyard together. Who are your friends now, Rodney?
House Helper
I'm gonna dock your dollar if you keep messing around with my daughter's weed stash.
Rodney
Doc, your dollar.
Gummoe
You know his friends over Trey and Doughboy and.
House Helper
Oh, I see you've brought a couple of homies.
John Holmberg
That's right.
Brady
That's how it's gonna. He's just gonna end up calling you that.
Rodney
Hey, welcome home, mother. I got a couple friends gotta lay low for a minute. They're gonna do it in your house here, mother.
Brady
That sounds great now, Rodney. Anyway, congratulations to you, Brad. That's a quite a life you've carved out for yourself. How did you handle it when he's
Rodney
like, I understand you've been talking about me now.
Brady
So. Yeah.
Rodney
Just good, though.
Freddie
Yeah.
Brady
Yeah. Even though you should have said, I'm
John Holmberg
uncomfortable with you here, but you're trusting
Brady
them to go through the. Like, the whole house. I do that with cleaners all the time. I can't be in the house when they're there.
John Holmberg
That's the worst.
Brady
Because you could be doing that. You know, it's terrible to have people working around your house that. It's not like electricians or somebody who has to be. It's just people coming in, cleaning your house and you sit there and do nothing while they do it.
Radio Station Announcer
It's just so.
Brady
It just makes me feel horrible. Hate it so bad. But I certainly couldn't do it with the way Brady is. Which is Candyland.
Freddie
It's. The sign's already up there.
Brady
Yeah, it should be. It should be.
John Holmberg
I saw that.
Brady
Oh. Over the. Oh, gosh. It's great news. The countdown is on for war.
John Holmberg
Even Anderson Cooper last night called it war.
Brady
He said, yeah, I did. You know what?
Freddie
I caught a little ac.
Brady
He said, this happened. This happened, this happened. At the end of it, he goes, a lot happening in war this weekend.
John Holmberg
And I'm like, they know it's a show, too.
Brady
So they.
John Holmberg
They named the so of KO Megny is the new supreme leader. So this is the funnest part of the show.
Freddie
War.
John Holmberg
How long till we kill him? Because he ain't gonna last long.
Brady
No way.
John Holmberg
So this is now already has a
Freddie
missile with his name on it.
John Holmberg
They've leveled up the video game.
Brady
You know how in video games you
John Holmberg
have this, the assignment. You got through that mission.
Brady
And then they're like. And then they'll show a headline.
John Holmberg
New Supreme Leader named vows Death to America. Damn it. Vow.
Brady
And then it starts new.
John Holmberg
And you got to find this guy.
Brady
And he's extra hard to find. They're going to move him around all over the place now. We got to start blowing up stuff. We think he's in, and it's great. This is. This.
John Holmberg
This is another week of war.
Brady
That's going to be great.
John Holmberg
And if we can get them fast. Trump's playing a video game with Iran and I'm.
Brady
I'm all in. Now, the problem is gas is now $4,000. I got gas this morning.
John Holmberg
I'm like, holy Christ, how fast did
Brady
they get those prices to us? That was unnecessary. And that's more proof it's all a game. The barrel of the cost of barrel of oil is $120. Now, that happened last night already. The gas station right up here in the corner.
John Holmberg
It's almost 480.
Freddie
When. And. But when it drops down, it takes
Brady
forever to get it all straightened out. Yeah. Yeah. They won't. Yeah. When it dumps down to like $20 a barrel.
Freddie
Well, I don't know.
Brady
It.
Freddie
Yeah. It's a couple of weeks at least.
Brady
They always say the cost is always.
John Holmberg
It's baked in. If you've already gotten it, that's what it costs.
Brady
When they brought it over to. It's going to take months for it to come back down. It's just all.
Freddie
And we get Our. We get our mix here.
John Holmberg
All of it's a lie. All of it's a lie.
Brady
None of that's real. For them to be able to boost
John Holmberg
the prices, they're excited.
Brady
That's happy. Every. Every place is thrilled to shove five bucks up your ass.
Freddie
And if the gas has already gone that way, then everything else follows.
Brady
Well, yeah, because then the trucks, everything's going to be more expensive for a little bit. And that's the bad part. But we kill this new guy, we'll have it. And this one, we got to get on tv. This is going to. War is good.
John Holmberg
War is going to be spectacular. Tonight's episode should be amazing because we're
Brady
going to take a couple of shots and miss. You know, like you're doing a video game and then, you know, you get trouble. And then other people try to get you because you make yourself known. We're going to kill this new guy, hopefully by Wednesday. I'm guessing if the plot stays on point, Wednesday or Thursday, we kill the new guy. But what they've got to do now is have a backup new guy ready to go.
John Holmberg
And he can't be.
Gummoe
I'm sure they do.
Brady
Oh, they got a list.
John Holmberg
You're next.
Brady
They're on number 60 at this point.
John Holmberg
So quit hanging out together. It's like playing basketball.
Brady
Like Brett.
Freddie
Yeah, but it gets lonely.
John Holmberg
Quit bringing your defender to me. Like, why do you guys keep having meetings? There's Zoom and. And there's the other thing.
Brady
We're supposedly knocked out all their Internet,
John Holmberg
but they can make calls.
Brady
And Russia's evidently giving Iran information.
John Holmberg
I'm like, who? How?
Freddie
Who's got their phone numbers on your new leadership role? Who's gotten calls?
Rodney
Them?
John Holmberg
Well, no, there's Putin evidently giving, like, information on where to bomb Klein.
Gummoe
He's still got a rotary phone sitting there in the palace.
John Holmberg
I don't know who's calling, but blow that up, too. Like, this seems like it's all.
Brady
It's all fake.
John Holmberg
Nothing's real.
Gummoe
Did you see gas prices in California over eight bucks?
John Holmberg
Of course they are. It's got to be.
Brady
There's been an announcement and, oh, the stock market's dead and gone.
Freddie
There's gotta be one place. No, I heard there was five.
Commercial Announcer
You know, I've seen five a couple times.
John Holmberg
$5 in the corner.
Freddie
Yeah.
Brady
Here. Wow.
John Holmberg
When I went by was 494. Yesterday it was 455.
Brady
Like, what? For the middle one, not the low end one.
Gummoe
Yeah, well, and then the premium stuff.
John Holmberg
Premium's five bucks.
Gummoe
Yeah.
Brady
So. But war is going to be fun.
John Holmberg
I've got the joystick out.
Brady
I'm going to better try to kill another Hakameki.
John Holmberg
And we're gonna do another guy named after a loogie.
Brady
We're gonna. We're gonna kill that guy. And there he is and we kill him. And then we gotta kill another one and each level up.
John Holmberg
And then eventually like Sonic the Hedgehog, you get to the actual guy behind
Brady
the curtain and you have to kill him. And you jump and you bang into his head and you run under the thing. Cuz he's just shooting those bunny and then he turns into a bunch of friendly rabbits and it's over. Everybody remembers the end of Sonic.
John Holmberg
Did you ever get to the end of Sonic?
Brady
Oh great.
Gummoe
I didn't.
Brady
The doctor would go when he' machine and he start jumbling around and then you bounce into him and you had. There was a system to it because he'd shoot and then you got to bounce into him once and he shoots at you. And you jump under the thing and bounce into him the other side just going back and forth like a jump rope. And eventually if you hit him enough, he explodes into massive amounts of friendly rabbits. And then now it's peaceful. And then Sonic the Hedgehog just started all over from the first. Although everything was a little harder. You had leveled up to the second. You had to run through the whole thing twice. That's what we're doing in Iran. It's just a gigantic video game. So hopefully by Wednesday and the search is going to be awesome. This is basically like watching Jason Bourne. We don't have anything. You know, everybody's like, oh, we're at war. We're not. We're not doing anything. I've changed nothing in my entire life. People at war are those guys across the street here in the National Guard and all the military people and their families. That is who's actually at war. Brett and I are not at war. Yeah. We're just sitting back, being normal, sipping, you know, negronis over at, you know, wherever we go. I know it's a great drink, Brett. I shouldn't have said it to you though, but no, is this one.
John Holmberg
Oh, yes.
Brady
Yeah. Oh, there's a guy on a flying carpet. Yes. This is what makes war great, is the Internet's great with it. That's a song they play when they're coming after you. Guess so. Yeah. It's pretty great. That's AI right? That's not real.
Gummoe
Okay.
Brady
I'm just making sure. I just like. I Didn't think the flying carpets had that kind of. I didn't know that guy can look if that's a. If that was real and they can stand on a carpet that's flying like that. We're not going to win this one.
John Holmberg
Not going to get out.
Brady
You know what I watched?
John Holmberg
I watched the most absolute bat conversation
Brady
I've ever seen on television. A rab. This sounds like a joke. A rabbi, like a. Like a supreme priest. One of the dudes that's in the big red dress, like, he's in. He's the most transvestite of all the Catholics. They dress him up. A bishop, I don't know, but he's gay looking in that gigantic dress.
John Holmberg
And then I started to wonder, like, these Catholics are so mad at trans. And then you go to church and
Brady
it's just dudes in dresses running around
John Holmberg
just like you guys have started.
Brady
This could have been a cardinal. Well, either way, put the pants on, you're a man. God. God wants you in a dress. And then like a dude wears a dress and you want him banished from it. Doesn't make any sense anyway. A rabbi, a gay guy from the Catholic Church in a dress. Some. I don't know what they called him. Some moolah, like a Middle Eastern dude.
John Holmberg
They had all of them.
Brady
They were all uniting because they're like, we may not agree on how religion works, but we do know this, that AI and Satanism are something we have to stop. They think that there's a. There's Satan. They said the AI ushered in a new era of Satanism. And they warn religious leaders, this great power of Satan is going to come
John Holmberg
at you through AI.
Brady
And I started to think to myself, if this was.
John Holmberg
If anyone sat in a TV or
Brady
in a studio and said, turn the cameras on. We're worried that AI is going to make Medusa mad. We'd all just. You're an idiot. What are you doing that you think
John Holmberg
Satan's been waiting for AI?
Freddie
He's sneaky.
John Holmberg
He's not sneaky, John. Why does he. Why is he sneaky? He doesn't have to be sneaky.
Freddie
He's a computer genius.
Brady
But yes.
John Holmberg
So he's been sitting around for thousands of years. When the technology is right and we gotta wait for that, then I'll strike. I hate to break it to you dummies, but by your own book and your own rule, he's had access to
Brady
AI the whole time now.
John Holmberg
Yeah, but now you guys have it.
Brady
So now I can really play.
Michael
Why is he.
John Holmberg
Why does he participate in the rules? It doesn't make sense. If he's gonna take over A.I. why didn't he just take over TV? Nobody's stopping him. The whole Satan thing makes me giggle. Hysteric. It's Yosemite Sam in his little outfit.
Brady
Remember he said,
John Holmberg
wow, I'm the rooting is tootin his bad guy. It's like invention. And I just can't get over adults going on anything is seriously just with
Brady
their hands clasped going, well, of course that Satan is going to take over AI and what are you, Metallica? It's not. It's not. Napster.
John Holmberg
Calm down.
Freddie
They just want to assign it to the right person in charge.
Brady
Who?
Freddie
Your rabbi, your.
Brady
Okay, here's what I didn't notice in your roundtable of AI One polytheist from India.
John Holmberg
They're the ones you talk to about
Brady
AI getting taken over.
John Holmberg
That's the if anything's gonna get in
Brady
there, the, the guys who believe in
John Holmberg
Vishnu are the ones who are gonna stop it.
Brady
Not some Jew or some gay Catholic or some moolah.
Radio Station Announcer
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Radio Station Announcer
Holmberg's morning sickness.
Brady
They're not AI savvy.
John Holmberg
If I can tell you right now, Brett, who would you take?
Brady
A bishop, a rabbi, some guy in a. With a thing? Or a Middle Eastern dude who's got eight arms on his desk talking about Vishnu and an elephant? Who's fixing your computer from AI Satanism.
Gummoe
Oh, Kevin from Discover.
Brady
Kevin from.
John Holmberg
Yeah, that's right.
Brady
Mumbai's own. Yeah, yeah. Oh, they were very serious.
John Holmberg
And then some idiot in the audience is like, how do we know they're asking questions. How are we aware of Satan in our computer?
Brady
You're not. That's the key to it. Like, that just tells me, AI must be awesome. If religion's afraid of it, it means it's going to expose them.
Freddie
There, I think, is the big question. Will AI make the world a better place?
John Holmberg
No. Yeah, we are the problem.
Brady
It's not more entertaining.
Freddie
Yeah, there's Satan.
John Holmberg
That's not safe.
Freddie
Well, that's what I'm saying, people. That's human.
John Holmberg
That's kind of evil.
Gummoe
That's definitely more entertaining.
Brady
We're evil, all of us.
Freddie
Not all of us.
Brady
Well, then. Then why would that be the thing? If it's just going to be. Some people do dumb stuff and some people don't. It isn't evil. It's just. AI has nothing to do with it. Well, Satan's not in your computer.
John Holmberg
He's not thinking about it.
Freddie
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Oh, he's also not real. But I'm saying, yeah, I know from
Freddie
the experts about, you know, AI, you know, and who knows what to believe.
Brady
But they're like, here's my problem.
Freddie
He let it out too early.
Brady
Here's my issue. We, you know, no idea how the people, the dudes in dresses, still have the right to sit on a TV and say, we're worried that Satan's using AI to manipulate your children.
John Holmberg
And I'm like, you guys, how do they.
Brady
How.
John Holmberg
As a society, it's never changed. Still listening to those dudes in dresses
Brady
tell us what's wrong with how to treat kids.
John Holmberg
They lost the right to say that they've complete for thousands of years. That's not an exaggeration. That entire organization raped kids and hit it. And they're the ones going on TV
Brady
with the nerve to say, oh, you gotta watch out. You know, people do bad things to kids and we're here to protect that. You lost the right.
John Holmberg
Papa John's can't have a pizza place
Brady
because he said one bad word.
John Holmberg
They had to change the name.
Brady
We wouldn't Tolerate it. We would not tolerate it. He said a bad thing once. As far as we know. I'm sure I saw his first car. Yeah, he got caught once. That's right, Brett. That's right. Tom Brennaman can't do football games for, like, big game. He has to do, like, Cincinnati versus Wyoming. Nobody watches because he said a bad thing once.
Gummoe
Got caught once.
Brady
Those jackasses at that church put those dresses on and tell you how to treat kids. You lost the right to do it. You can't shut up.
John Holmberg
You know who's Satan? Them.
Brady
They're the ones who love it. They believe in it.
John Holmberg
They throw it in your face all the time. They did horrible things to people for
Brady
years, and no one ever.
John Holmberg
Everybody's so afraid to say, you guys did this.
Brady
You're Satan. Don't you dare talk about AI and what's going to happen to kids. You guys did worse.
Freddie
Well, the argument on that. It's not all of them.
Brady
There is all of them.
John Holmberg
Okay.
Freddie
Good ones.
Brady
The whole thing stood behind it. You think Papa John's whole board needed to go from one thing?
John Holmberg
A lot of them had to go.
Brady
No, they changed one and they got
John Holmberg
rid of a few other things.
Brady
They changed the name. They changed the sign. They had an apostrophe, which doesn't make any sense.
John Holmberg
They just showed that they were proactively
Brady
not going to tolerate what just happened. Don't get it. The dudes in dresses can still go on TV and start saying nonsense. Father Fortunato de Nolpo. Jackass. Oh, we're here to protect the kids. No, no, no, no, no, no. You guys have. You go there.
John Holmberg
You should have to tell everybody you
Brady
live in the neighborhood. I like to put big red dresses on and wander around and talk to the youth. All right. No. Oh, it drove me crazy. Like, using children appeals to them because it's a form of power being exercised over the innocent, and that's who we're here to protect. That's new. AI that just told me they're scared of AI exposing them because they're already putting it out there going, oh, this is a bad. Don't pay attention to that. Anything bad comes out. It's Satan. You hear about us on there. It's just Satan. Oh, it drove me bananas. That would. Drove me nuts. I love.
Freddie
Would you feel any better that it was a cardinal or that got busted for going to a brothel numerous times?
Brady
Did that happen?
Freddie
Yeah.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
No, I.
Freddie
They're.
John Holmberg
They're horrible. They're horrible little weirdos.
Freddie
It was a Brothel.
Brady
That's right. Yeah.
John Holmberg
They're horrible little weirdos in dresses that
Brady
wander around and do this. And they're just revered because they've. Over years, they've been told to be.
John Holmberg
Any other per.
Brady
Any person goes up on a Senate floor or on TV and starts talking about how they're worried about Thor, like we're worried about Zeus coming. Like, this is pretty bad. Or if that. The weather that's coming our way. Well, Poseidon's pretty angry at us, right? You'd laugh him out of the room. Do it with your magic man wrecking everything.
John Holmberg
He's not sitting there waiting for AI. But it was a big deal. They had, like, put together groups of people.
Brady
This is something we really need to worry about. That has nothing to do with AI itself. It's the devil.
John Holmberg
Well, you're not gonna stop them.
Freddie
You can't control it.
Brady
Of course not. Because it. Well, you can if you put a rational brain in your head and go, yeah, the fiery weirdo that lives under me that bangs his little pitchfork around.
Freddie
I just meant AI, you know, you can't.
John Holmberg
No, that's.
Brady
That's real.
John Holmberg
Yeah, Be real worried about AI, but
Brady
it has nothing to do with Satan. So dumb. So dumb. Oh, drove me bananas. And I love it because every time I get off on a little tangent, somebody from the diocese will sneak a little ladder in, something will pop over here. More than happy for you guys to come on down here and start talking about your fantasies. By all means, wear the dress and tell me how wrong transvestites are. That makes tons of sense now. God never wanted a man to dress as a woman.
John Holmberg
Well, you do it every Sunday and then you ask for, like, us to
Brady
worship you, you weirdo. Put the dress on. It's only official if we're in dresses. Oh, ye hate transvestites and gays. Like, why do you dress like them then? What's going on? They don't make any sense. Have we killed Khomeini yet? Keep an eye on Khomeini. Watches on. I gotta say thanks to everybody at the Arizona Pet Project, too. We were. Brady went down to this. We had a great event on Friday night at the Biltmore and raised a bunch of money. We didn't do it. We were just participants. But they raised a ton of money for pet charities all over the place. Leanna Taylor does an amazing job. Put the heck.
John Holmberg
That was the best chicken I've had
Brady
at one of those fundraisers. That was pretty damn good. Did you like it?
Freddie
Yeah.
Brady
You're the ultimate judge of that. I've had two fundraiser chickens that knocked my socks off. Both of them were at the Biltmore. Just knocked my socks off. I was at.
Freddie
Kurt Warner's event wasn't dry.
Brady
Kurt Warner's event was a plank of. Of wood. And evidently there was some movement. Wood with some gravy over there was. Well, the gravy was also wood. I think it was sawdust. It was. I very rarely. Can I not just go, wow, you know, I'll choke this down.
John Holmberg
I had to stop.
Brady
I'm like, I can't eat this. And everybody at the table's like, this is. Evidently there was some movement in the kitchen that night where people weren't allowed to come back the next day. Let's just say that because the event, the food was so bad. You know, an off night where you make 500 dishes and they're all bad. That's tough.
Freddie
We've been holding it for a while.
Brady
That's hard to do.
Gummoe
Wasn't a normal frozen chicken breast with, you know, maybe pre made grilled marks on it and stuff.
Brady
And that would have been awesome compared to what they served. I'm not sure what that was. Yeah, and you do. Like, the knife wouldn't go through it. I'm not kidding. Like try. It was like trying to cut like this computer screen. Why is this not. It was so bad that Friday night,
Freddie
it made a sound when you're saw.
Brady
Oh, it was. Yeah. It screamed for help and then air came out of it. It was weird. But yeah, the chicken at that thing. Friday was good. Like really good. It was a good event. Always good. It's nice. And Ian Schwartz of Channel 3 did a great job hosting that. Beautiful. Then off to the swizz.
Freddie
Saturday, wasn't it?
Brady
Saturday, what did I say? Friday. Yeah, Saturday. Yeah, Saturday night. And then it made me think about them like, yeah. Off to the Swizzle Inn with my gay neighbors and Michael and Troy and then Ian and his. His mate Toby. Let me tell you what, you put a few drinks in the gays and you open up a hot dog stand. Moth to a flame, my friend. Moth to a flame. They cannot.
John Holmberg
They have no wiener.
Brady
Self control.
John Holmberg
Any sort of tube, like cylindrical meat, like object.
Brady
Gays are gonna eat that at one in the morning. No matter. They can't walk by it. It's impossible. Drawn right in, all of them, just every in suits, just.
John Holmberg
And Michael wanted that wiener so bad, he dropped it on the parking lot
Brady
and still hit the swivel and picked
John Holmberg
it up, put it Right back in his mouth.
Brady
I'm like, eh, he's chocolate LeBaron before. So that's like the least of his concern.
Freddie
The end of the show, Ian's like, where did John. Well, they went. I said, I think they're going to the Swiz for some hot dogs.
Brady
And yeah, he was gone.
John Holmberg
Ian was there two minutes. I told him I was on stage with him for a minute.
Brady
Said, are you sticking around at the bar after? I'm like, nah, I think my gays want to go over to the Swizzle in. He's like, okay. Like, you're more than welcome. He goes, okay.
John Holmberg
And I swear to you, it took
Brady
us like he had to say goodbye to everybody.
John Holmberg
We just left two minutes after I said, foot in the Swizz.
Brady
Didn't even have our drinks yet. There's Ian Schwartz from Channel three. Oh, the hot dogs. Have we eaten hot dogs yet?
John Holmberg
Like, Jesus Christ. You guys calm down.
Brady
Then you just look in that parking lot. It's just dudes just burying hot dogs in their gullets. Like, Mike, I never see a woman out in that line.
Gummoe
So you were the minority that night?
Brady
Yeah, yeah, straight. I was a CIS male.
Gummoe
You were the token.
Brady
I was. I felt. I felt like Rodney at Brady's house. Wandered around how to place crazy super gang, but a lot of fun. And they put on a hell of a show. So I say thanks to Leanna and the gang over there for being so sweet. I was warning everybody about AI. You know, Satan finally got WI fi. We've got to worry about this. This is the hell. Has like Quantum. Yeah.
Freddie
Learned something about my buddy Carl Oberg. His dog growing up. Tokers. The weed smoking dog. No, it was. That's what he called him because it was very popular term when he was a kid.
Brady
That's right. And he named his dog after deadbeats who smoke weed in the backyard. Cokers. Yeah, Carl gave a nice talk. It was good. It was a beautiful thing. So raising a lot of money for great causes. And again, Leanna Taylor's the one to talk to about that. She had us out there. It was great, great, great time. Lovely. What do you got in the. Oh, we got to go to the big board of musical treats. Almost skipped ahead. 585-9-800. We need a wake up song. We'll get it all together and scream it.
John Holmberg
Get your app out. Almost every band we play is going to be part of sick new world
Brady
that is happening in April and we are going to load up on this thing. So I mean, if you hear, your
John Holmberg
phone will tell you, it'll tell you who's there and it'll say, please click on this.
Brady
I'll tell you. Yeah, we got. I'm looking. We have five of them right off, you know, coming your way. And every time you click on it, you get yourself a little bit qualified, a little bit more involved in sick new world, little bit bigger chance for you to head on over there to Vegas and get your tickets to the show. And then one of you, that huge VIP tickets you get, the hotel stay going to throw another 200 bucks at you so you can fuel up and get out there. We won't put you felons on planes. We just don't want to risk it. But we'll give you money so you can drive yourself up or give you money. You put it in your pocket and
John Holmberg
you fly yourself up.
Brady
You can't be responsible. Yeah, that's what I would do, too. I'm not gonna drive. That's too far. Give us a wake up song. We'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD.
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Brady
He said fully erect.
Radio Station Announcer
98 kupt.
John Holmberg
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Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness
Date: March 9, 2026
Host & Crew: John Holmberg (Host), Brady Bogen, Bret "Gummoe" Vesely, Dick Toledo, Freddie
Episode Theme:
This episode blends local promotions, personal stories, irreverent banter, and satirical observations on current events. The team swings from goofy back-and-forth about household help and dental woes to scathing, hilarious commentary on war coverage, gas prices, and the absurdities of religion, especially in the context of artificial intelligence.
| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |---|---|---| | 04:24 | John Holmberg | "The algorithm steals all your information. We sell it to foreigners... But you might win contest stuff." | | 07:48 | Brady | "You gotta be a weirdo to want to be a dentist. Dentist and gynecologist." | | 09:17 | Rodney (Brady’s Cleaner) | "Now, sir. By the way, these are underpants. I assumed they was. Cause they covered in poopy." | | 18:16 | Brady | "Trump's playing a video game with Iran and I'm all in." | | 19:09 | Brady | "Every place is thrilled to shove five bucks up your ass." | | 21:42 | Brady | "Now it's peaceful. And then Sonic the Hedgehog just started all over from the first ... That's what we're doing in Iran." | | 24:01 | Brady | "Put the pants on, you're a man. God wants you in a dress?" | | 29:32 | John Holmberg | "You lost the right ... That entire organization raped kids and hid it, and they're the ones going on TV with the nerve to say, oh, you gotta watch out. You know, people do bad things to kids and we're here to protect that." | | 30:28 | John Holmberg | "You know who’s Satan? Them." | | 36:18 | Brady | "Let me tell you what, you put a few drinks in the gays and you open up a hot dog stand. Moth to a flame, my friend." |
The show mixes sarcasm, irreverence, and raw honesty in a classic morning radio format. The hosts riff off absurd news, personal stories, and local color with relentless humor and no-holds-barred takedowns of hypocrisy and nonsense, whether from religion, media, or daily life.
For listeners who missed this episode:
Expect a whirlwind of punchy banter, local flavor, and satirical shakedowns of everything from dental abscesses to doom-laden AI preachers—in classic Holmberg fashion.