03-18-25 - BR - TUE - The Band Train Is More Streamed Than Most Famous Bands - Fla Man Pulls Gun When Denied Ability To Sing Cranberries

Summary

Summary of Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona (03-18-25)

Release Date: March 18, 2025

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Introduction

In the March 18, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness on Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, host John Holmberg and his co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo engage listeners with a mix of humor, current events, and intriguing discussions. The episode delves into the surprising streaming popularity of the band Train, a concerning incident involving a Florida man at a karaoke bar, and various entertaining anecdotes that showcase the hosts' dynamic chemistry.

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1. Comedians and Industry Insights

The episode kicks off with a lively conversation about the current landscape of stand-up comedians and their evolving careers. Chad raises questions about the sustained presence of well-known comedians like Bert Kreischer and Joe Rogan in the media scene.

• Chad Vesely (01:18): "He's evil sitting right here. Come on."
• Chad Vesely (01:43): "It's not good either way. Things aren't going great if you're Here you're either just starting or things aren't going well."

The hosts reflect on how some comedians reach a pinnacle of fame that takes them away from local platforms like their show, highlighting the transient nature of comedic fame.

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2. The Brady Report: All Pro Shade Concepts

Brady introduces the "Brady Report," a segment where he shares unique news items or promotions. This episode features All Pro Shade Concepts, Arizona's premier patio shade provider.

• Brady Bogen (03:17): "These guys help you out. They'll give you roll down patio shades... Drops temperature. Unbelievable."
• Chad Vesely (04:20): "Neil DeGrasse Tyson's house or something. That's a science experiment."

The discussion humorously intertwines practical information about patio shades with exaggerated scenarios, emphasizing the importance of shaded outdoor spaces in Arizona's scorching climate.

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3. Train's Surprising Streaming Success

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to the revelation that the band Train has amassed more monthly listeners on Spotify than legendary acts such as Led Zeppelin, The Eagles, Van Halen, Tom Petty, U2, R.E.M., Pearl Jam, and even Elvis Presley.

• Brett Vesely (05:30): "The band Train has more monthly listeners on Spotify than Led Zeppelin, the Eagles, Van Halen, Tom Petty, U2 REM, Pearl Jam and Elvis."
• Chad Vesely (05:56): "I find it amazing... That's ridiculous."

The hosts express astonishment at these statistics, debating the factors contributing to Train's digital streaming dominance. They speculate whether nostalgic appeal, catchy hits like "Drops of Jupiter," or effective digital marketing strategies play pivotal roles in this unexpected surge.

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4. Florida Man Pulls Gun Over Karaoke Dispute

One of the most intense discussions revolves around an alarming incident where Aaron Jablowski, a 34-year-old from Clearwater, Florida, pulled a gun at the OverTime Sports Bar after a dispute over singing "Linger" by The Cranberries.

• Bret Vesely (14:15): "He was upset at the OverTime Sports Bar... because the karaoke machine wasn't working."
• Chad Vesely (15:37): "God damn it. I'm singing Linger whether they play it or not."
• Brett Vesely (16:08): "He was arrested on two felonies. Aggravated assault, possession of a firearm by a felon, rap shooting. He also got a DUI. Disorderly conduct."

The hosts dissect the incident, discussing Aaron's motivations, the legal consequences he faces, and the broader implications of such aggressive reactions in social settings. The conversation blends serious concern with characteristic humor, questioning the intersection of passion for music and personal conduct.

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5. Entertaining Anecdotes and Fun Facts

Interspersed throughout the episode are segments filled with quirky facts and humorous storytelling:

• Brett Vesely (09:36): "On average, giraffes sleep for less than two hours a day. On the flip side, pythons sleep for at least 18 hours."
• Brett Vesely (10:05): "Carrots are actually bad for rabbits and can cause health problems. But because of Bugs Bunny, pretty much everyone thinks rabbits love carrots."

These snippets provide light-hearted relief and showcase the hosts' ability to entertain with both factual information and playful banter.

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6. St. Patrick's Day Parade Insights

The hosts share insights and updates about the St. Patrick's Day celebrations, particularly focusing on the South Boston parade which managed to have only 11 arrests amidst massive attendance.

• Brett Vesely (11:00): "This year, St. Patrick's Day parade in South Boston only had 11 arrests... they confiscated slews of Borgs."
• Chad Vesely (16:47): "I found info on the Borg... called Blackout Rage Gallon."

They delve into the concept of "Borgs"—blackout drunk gallon jugs of alcohol banned from parade routes—and discuss the cultural significance and challenges of managing large-scale celebrations.

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7. Listener Stories and Experiences

Engaging with their audience, the hosts share and react to various listener-submitted stories, ranging from absurd to downright bizarre. These interactions highlight the show's interactive nature and the hosts' penchant for improvisational humor.

• Brett Vesely (27:35): "The dude just starts beating another person in the school streets, and people are laughing..."
• Chad Vesely (34:30): "There's a guy in a wheelchair... Here's Ramesh Chand."

These segments are peppered with witty remarks and humorous critiques, ensuring listeners remain entertained throughout.

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8. Social Media and Viral Content Commentary

The hosts comment on trending videos and viral content, offering their candid and often humorous takes on various online phenomena.

• Chad Vesely (25:41): "A kid was basically doing a stun karate board, and they light his hand on fire and the rest of his body catches on fire."
• Brady Bogen (26:20): "I have something similar to it if that's not it. So we'll cheat in a little bit."

Their discussions often juxtapose the entertainment value of such content with concerns over safety and the implications of viral fame.

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9. Closing Remarks and Updates

As the show nears its end, Tracy shares a personal update regarding her hospitalization, attributing it to food poisoning—a claim met with playful skepticism by the hosts.

• Tracy (36:12): "Doctors say it was food poisoning... during the playoffs."
• Chad Vesely (36:53): "I'm worried about Tracy."

The episode concludes with a blend of genuine concern for Tracy's well-being and the hosts' signature humor, ensuring a light-hearted yet caring close to the morning show.

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Conclusion

The March 18, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness encapsulates the essence of a morning radio show designed to entertain, inform, and engage its listeners. Through a combination of surprising statistics, concerning real-life incidents, humorous anecdotes, and interactive listener segments, John Holmberg and his team deliver a multifaceted program that resonates with a broad Arizona audience. The seamless blend of humor with serious discourse ensures that listeners are not only amused but also left reflecting on the varied topics discussed.

Transcript

[Dick Toledo]

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[Brady]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by mmpguns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Chad]

You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself.

[Brady]

He's evil sitting right here. Come on.

[Chad]

No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. It is kind of cool. Got a lot of emails from people talking about Bert Kreischer calling in still and still. Be like, he's. He's in that level I always talk about. It's like, oh, we'll never hear from him again. And he's playing arenas like we had Brad Williams a couple weeks ago. And I'm very proud of those comedians that we've known for years and then they go on to great giant things and we'll never see them again. Joe Rogan was in here a lot. We'll never see Joe Rogan again.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Chad]

Why Joe Coy was mentioned here. I think we're close. Joe. Joe's. I think Joe might come back here in the next year or two. If we're still. Well, we should still be here. And then we're starting to get to the point if we're still alive. Used to be. If we're still here now, if we live for another couple years, I think we'll see Coy come back.

[Brady]

Well, Mencia came back.

[Chad]

Mencia had to. That wasn't. I know. That's what I'm saying.

[Dick Toledo]

Fall back.

[Chad]

That's what I'm saying. You're 100%.

[Brady]

But he did have to come back.

[Chad]

Because at first Carlos would come in and then he went through the moon and then something horrible happened to Carlos and now he's back. Yeah, they all eventually. We're a first and last stop in your career. It's not good either way. Things aren't going great if you're Here you're either just starting or things aren't going well. But Bert still calls in and does that. And he doesn't have to. So it was really cool to have Bert on this one. I think that's great. And he's just one of those guys. He's just always gonna be Burt Kreischer. I don't think he has the.

[Dick Toledo]

Got Grape Ape photos at the ready, ready to go.

[Chad]

Like he's got him. And those pictures of those. The MILF contest he helped us with all those years ago. First thing. And she looked amazing. I forgot how pretty Grape Ape was. And he's right. She's probably nearing 50. What do you suppose she was 30 in that picture? I remember. Right.

[Dick Toledo]

I think she was 27.

[Chad]

Was she? Geez. Good job, Toledo. And that had to be 12, 13 years ago. So she's probably almost 40.

[Dick Toledo]

And Brett, what does that make her?

[Chad]

Yeah. We all turn to you. Unfortunately, Brett's not wrong.

[Brady]

It's like milk.

[Chad]

Well, she had a kid anyway. That's why she was. She's got an std. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report is brought to you by all Pro Shade Concepts. These are Arizona's best patio shades. We all know what the sun is, right? It's that big ball of fire. We see it a lot. It's here. It's always here. We hardly ever see a day without.

[Brett]

It's coming in closer.

[Chad]

Oh, but it's gonna get real tight a few days. You can touch it. We're closing in on the days where you're gonna be looking for shade. And these guys help you out. They'll give you roll down patio shades. Brady's house got one of those. The awnings and all that stuff. And it adds a ton of shaded square footage to your outdoor space. And that makes a huge difference. Drops temperature. Unbelievable. Do you have the misters on yours as well? I don't. You can do that too.

[Brett]

You can.

[Chad]

Yeah. It's a game changer. These guys can get your outdoor everything going. And if you have one of those TVs on your patio but you don't have shade, hey, you might as well have a mirror. It's terrible. So these, they do that too. So it's just an awesome way to get your outdoor space rolling. All you have to do to go to get it started. Get your shade installed before the summer hits all Pro shade dot com. That's where you go. Thank you for sponsoring a Neighbor that.

[Dick Toledo]

Put up a TV like you're saying. Yeah, and he didn't realize it. The reflection off the sun burned a hole in his lawn.

[Chad]

No kidding.

[Brett]

Wow.

[Chad]

The TV screen. That's what he told you. But he's cooking. But it was even cooked a hole.

[Brett]

And it was like a perfect square laser.

[Chad]

Neil DeGrasse Tyson's house or something. That's a science experiment. There's no way my TV plastic screen on it burned a hole in the. Anyway, quit asking questions. All pro shades.com can fix that. If you've got meth holes in your backyard, they can shade them. If you're building your meth empire back there, Walter White, why sunburn. Get it. Get a nice shady structure. Brady reported.

[Brett]

Good Tuesday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello world. Happy Awkward Moments Day.

[Chad]

Oh, sorry.

[Brett]

And National Sloppy Joe Day.

[Chad]

The awkward moment last night as Joe Libman and I were in the Rah Rah room talking and the staff kind of hangs around right where we were. And one of the girls came over and said something and I think Joe answered her. And her next. It was the most awkward thing I've ever heard. Her next sentence, she sang. She said something like, I'm so hungover. And we heard it and I think Joe said something to her and she goes, so hungover from yesterday. I'm like, what are you doing? Well, don't do that. She goes, I don't know why I did that. Like nobody knows this just turn around. This just got really weird.

[Brett]

Got a couple of basis fun facts. The band Train has more monthly listeners on Spotify than Led Zeppelin, the Eagles, Van halen, Tom Petty, U2 REM, Pearl Jam and Elvis.

[Chad]

Say that again.

[Brett]

Train has more monthly listener.

[Chad]

Train.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Chad]

Drops of Jupiter.

[Brett]

Yes. On Spotify than those bands that I just combined. No.

[Chad]

Okay. I was gonna say I thought you.

[Brett]

Said each band individual.

[Chad]

When you hit me with two, I'm like, oh, my God.

[Brett]

Well, I find it.

[Chad]

I find it amazing. The Drops of Jupiter. Is that popular Anyway, Is there a girl song they have that I don't know about? What else does Train have?

[Brady]

That marry you song that gets played in every wedding.

[Chad]

That's it. The one that no man listens to. It's the Taylor Swift of music.

[Brady]

Yes.

[Chad]

I see. Well, that makes sense now because Desperate Ringless just pound Matt over and over. We'll just put it on a loop. That and that Bruno Mars marry me thing. What's the. Oh, do you have Riding Toledo's. Oh, Toledo's thing? You have it.

[Dick Toledo]

I'm riding the Bus.

[Chad]

Oh no.

[Dick Toledo]

We had that Bert brought up.

[Chad]

Yeah. Rosie O'Donnell is a mentally Andy McDowell. And yes, Brady did say Sam. I am. That's Dr. Seuss. I am Sam, the movie he was thinking of. He was hungry for ham so he said the wrong thing.

[Dick Toledo]

He's gonna isolate.

[Chad]

He was thinking about green eggs and ham and it's breakfast. So he didn't think of Sean Penn.

[Brady]

Oh yeah. Hey, soul sister Drops of Juvenile.

[Chad]

Hey, soul sister. Yeah, but still more than Pearl Jam. And who else has yet this?

[Brett]

Led Zeppelin, the Eagles, Van Halen.

[Chad]

That's ridiculous. But then again, you think about it. Those are the. Nobody's spotifying that like they're a little more like 25 year old girl 10 years ago when SP first got going.

[Brett]

That's true.

[Chad]

So it makes sense that they would have that in the loop for 10 years. So it's been going for.

[Brady]

And here's that.

[Chad]

This is a pretty good song.

[Brady]

How many.

[Dick Toledo]

How many listens does that have? Are you on the Spotify or whatever?

[Chad]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Let's see here.

[Chad]

This is the Marry Me song.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

This one's got to be get the world now.

[Chad]

And you play this at weddings at your dj?

[Brady]

Unfortunately, I try to talk him out.

[Brett]

So many tears.

[Chad]

What do you try to talk him into?

[Brady]

Anything but this.

[Chad]

This slash your wrist.

[Brady]

Why would you want to marry anybody wants to listen to this crap?

[Chad]

Brett is also a marriage counselor. Absolutely. He'll DJ and life coach you right through your first few days of nuptial bliss.

[Brady]

Well, here's the. Here's the train numbers on Spotify.

[Chad]

It's ridiculous. Just from what Brady said. I'm blown away.

[Brady]

This one's got 290 million. 91 million.

[Chad]

That one's got a billion listens.

[Brady]

Hey, soul sister and drops of Jupiter are over a billion.

[Chad]

Is that 1.7 billion listens? Hey, soul sister yeah Damn. I don't understand this at all.

[Brady]

I don't know. Drive by and that's got 857 million.

[Chad]

Jesus.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, I remember this. I know on the other side of the street I knew girl that look like you I guess that's DEJ Train.

[Chad]

Is a lot better than I thought.

[Dick Toledo]

Recognize.

[Chad]

No kidding.

[Dick Toledo]

New York, Santa Fe.

[Chad]

That's a bet I'd have lost. There used to be that old stat.

[Brady]

Oh yeah. I didn't think it was that big.

[Chad]

The old one. That was like bands whose second albums. I forget what it was. They sold a. A bajillion copies on their first album and then their second one actually outsold it. There's only five. And one of them was Def Leppard. And it was always like the Eagles, you know, the ACDC had all the stuff that kind of had this sophomore album and their second album just exploded on their. And yeah. And they had to hit like platinum stats. I forget what the stat was, but Def Leppard was in it. They didn't belong like they're good, but it was like no way.

[Brady]

Well, yeah, because that Def Leppard, the first albums that on through the night that had nothing and then High and.

[Chad]

Dry was after that just a massive. Yeah. Follow up.

[Brett]

On average, giraffes sleep for less than two hours a day. On the flip side, python sleep for at least 18 hours.

[Chad]

So they're making up for it.

[Brett]

Carrots are actually bad for rabbits and can cause health problems. But because of Bugs Bunny, pretty much everyone thinks rabbits love carrots.

[Eddie]

You tell them, Brady. Carrots are terrible. That's poison. You don't give it to a rabbit or a person. It shouldn't even be food. Carrots. What were you thinking? It's in the ground. What else do you pick up off the ground and eat, you pig?

[Dick Toledo]

Potatoes.

[Chad]

Potatoes.

[Eddie]

Disgusting. If it's on the ground, it belongs on the ground. It's like chewed gum.

[Dick Toledo]

Beets.

[Eddie]

Beets aren't food. That's for throwing. Beats are headphones. Dr. Dre, Dr. Dumbass. Tell me one thing you found on the floor that you said.

[Brady]

Mm.

[Eddie]

I'm gonna eat that cheesecake. Okay, maybe a cheesecake. If they came from the floor, but they don't. Toledo. They come from heaven. I believe it. Toledo's an asshole.

[Brett]

This year's St. Patrick's Day.

[Eddie]

Pray on the floor. Be like a David Hasselhoff dessert.

[Chad]

He's losing weight.

[Brett]

This year. St. Patrick's Day parade in South Boston only had 11 arrests, which isn't bad for. You know. They're saying a million people attend this parade. It started an hour half early than usually did starting.

[Dick Toledo]

They didn't have time to pregame.

[Brett]

Well, they did confiscate slews of Borgs.

[Brady]

What?

[Brett]

Those are the blackout drunk gallons. They put basically alcohol in a plastic gallon jug and they bring them on the parade route and you're not supposed to have them.

[Dick Toledo]

And they call them Borgs.

[Brett]

They call them Borgs.

[Brady]

Never heard of that.

[Chad]

No, never heard of it either. Mixing.

[Brett]

It's gotta be from Boston. It took my Borg.

[Chad]

Yeah, Tommy, look at the Borgs milk jug.

[Dick Toledo]

You gotta be mispronouncing that. That's gotta be pronounced.

[Chad]

I don't Know how else you pronounce a bushel of Borgs? Can't have these Borgs here, boys. Morning sickness.

[Brett]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Tracy]

Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

This Peruvian fisherman was found alive after drifting at Sea for 94 days. Maximo Napa is his name. 61 years old. Was rescued in a small fishing boat on Tuesday after being spotted by an Ecuadorian vessel off the coast of chimbote, northern Peru. 94 days. He said he survived on eating cockroaches, birds and turtles. And he kept thinking about his grandchild. And that's what he's trying to eat.

[Chad]

That too.

[Brett]

Stay alive.

[Chad]

He says that and people think it was a beautiful thing. But what he was thinking about is a meaty grandchild that could. Oh, God, I could eat him. For days.

[Brett]

He went out in his small boat. Weather. Weather turned like Gilligan's Island.

[Tracy]

That's all right, Brady. The next sign is you throw up and your nose starts bleeding. You'll be all right.

[Brett]

I'll clear out.

[Tracy]

Get the wheel. Said we got to get him off the court.

[Chad]

Thanks, Tracy.

[Brett]

We got a Uber driver in South Windsor, Connecticut. After picked up a client, took him home and said, could I use your bathroom? Your house?

[Chad]

The Uber guy did. The answer is no.

[Brett]

Well, they said yes, and then he came out. Open the door. There he is whacking.

[Chad]

Hey. Hey.

[Brett]

Exposed himself.

[Chad]

I'd rather have the Uber driver try and kill me than have him just started beating off in the hallway.

[Brett]

Here's Ramesh Chand.

[Brady]

Who?

[Chad]

Hold on. They opened the door on him or he must have been in there.

[Brett]

He opened the door.

[Chad]

Oh, he opened it and he's whacking off.

[Brett]

Yeah, he was exposing himself. Thought maybe this. This could be in play. I'm feeling good here.

[Chad]

Yeah, I think I've got a vibe with this girl.

[Brett]

Gonna make my move.

[Chad]

She didn't yell at me once in the car ride. She let me in the house. I mean, that's as good as asking me to take my dick out.

[Brett]

We got a 34 year old Florida man, Clearwater, Florida, named Aaron Jablowski. He was.

[Dick Toledo]

Hey, would you blow me?

[Chad]

No, sorry.

[Brett]

It's Jablonski. He plays to call. He's upset at the overTime. Sports Bar, 2:30am because the karaoke machine wasn't working.

[Chad]

He wants to sing more train songs.

[Brett]

He stormed out. Actually, it was wanted to sing Linger, the Cranberries, Patty's Day. Close her down maybe.

[Chad]

You know what's fun to do?

[Brett]

Whipped out a gun.

[Chad]

Change the Word linger to Ginger because it's just one letter difference. Or dinger.

[John]

You have to let it dinger.

[Chad]

It's just. It's for the Colorado Rocky fan and all of us.

[John]

You have to have to let it dinger.

[Brady]

Oh, that's a concert I'd go to.

[Chad]

I would do if you started this thing.

[John]

We changed the words to all of our songs to celebrate the mascot of the Colorado Rockies.

[Brett]

He stormed out. And that's when another karaoke fan tried to get him to cool down. Aaron was not in the mood. He pulled a gun out of his waistband. They pointed at the other man and shouted, I don't effing care. Someone called the cops when they showed up, Aaron still had the gun. Witnesses say they saw him waving it around. He fired off around.

[Chad]

God damn it. I'm singing Linger whether they play it or not. Play it. Give me the karaoke.

[Dick Toledo]

Mother didn't take a bullet.

[Brett]

No. No one got hit.

[Chad]

You gotta go home. I'm singing lingerie. No, you're not. Turn on the machine if I'm not. Fine. Forget it. Listen, I'm doing it.

[John]

If you could return.

[Chad]

You guys.

[John]

Don't let it burn. Don't let it fade.

[Chad]

All right, just let him finish.

[Brett]

He was arrested on two felonies. Aggravated assault, possession of a firearm by a felon, rap shooting. He also got a dui. Disorderly conduct.

[Chad]

Did he get the thing linger at all? In the car on the drive to the Maybe.

[Dick Toledo]

Man, he missed jail a lot.

[Brady]

Yeah, the cops are like, oh, Christ.

[Chad]

Just drop him off. Just, you know, let him go. How long's the ride to the police station, Mother? There's about eight minutes. Perfect. That's two lingers. We're doing it. Stop singing Linger. Hey, Siri, don't do that. My phone's gonna get cranberries.

[Dick Toledo]

I found info on the Borg. It's called Blackout Rage Gallon. Yeah, it holds 700 like you.

[Chad]

Yeah, yeah. You don't acknowledge like. Oh, yeah, that makes tons of sense to a guy like me. You acknowledge that like it was yours.

[Brett]

That's what I said, though.

[Chad]

No. God. You know what? Screw you guys. Entirety idiots. The man at 2:30 in the morning should be allowed to sing a cranberry song anytime he wants. Mother, I spent a lot of money in here. Sharp. And listen, I'm gonna hit the high notes. I'm doing it too. It's a long intro. I forgot how long the intro. Maybe you guys are right.

[Brady]

Let's get Babe.

[Chad]

Yeah. Damn. There we go. Hit it, Dolores. It's a Beautiful song. I'm gonna dedicate it to my beautiful wife, who I haven't talked to in three years, but she'll be back with my. Please step off the stage. No goddamn way.

[John]

If you. If you have a turn. Don't let it burn Put your gun.

[Chad]

Down don't let it fade I'll kill you, mother.

[John]

Never use. But it's just too. I do.

[Chad]

By the way, when you look like me and you go to a karaoke bar and you do that, it stops the room.

[Dick Toledo]

Wait a minute.

[Chad]

You've done. Yes. I love those types of carry because people see it. You'll hear the audible groan at the grapevine. And we got John coming up here. And then on the screen it says cranberries Linger or Alanis Morissette. One of her slow songs like. Thank you. And I always. I always grab things. Hey, folks, thanks. I hope you're having a great night tonight. Today everybody's having a good time.

[John]

I'm such a fool for you.

[Chad]

It's like that big bald cancer guy is gay gender fluid. Oh, my God.

[Brady]

Hey, you guys can do that. At night of singing Dead, we did.

[Chad]

Oh, yeah, we talked about that.

[Brady]

Dead.

[Chad]

I think we did Linger. Well, we did the. The rock version. That was the year that my in ear blew up and my ear started bleeding. It was the worst start to a show ever. Oh, so that was so painful. I had to get through Alice in Chains and Linger and Lincoln park with my ear bleeding. I thought I blew up my eardrum. It was bleeding internally. I could taste it.

[Brady]

Did it just linger in there?

[Chad]

It had to. I had to let it. This is a mandatory thing. That girl that started singing lines to us last night should have done this.

[Brady]

Your voice smells like farts.

[John]

Your voice just smells like farts. My husband Scott has a problem. He says it's medical. His ass lets out. All of the gas comes right out his ass.

[Chad]

It's a good song. You can't help it. Once it's in your head, you'll sing Zombies. Better, but yeah.

[Brett]

In Washington, D.C. this postal worker was found guilty last week of stealing more than 1.6 million worth of US treasury and private party checks. Taking them right out of the mail. He spent it on lavish vacations, strip clubs. He went on from almost a year and a half, bilking this money out of the mail. His name was Hachikoso Muchimba.

[Brady]

I'm sure that's close.

[Chad]

Did we play it, man? Do you have a picture? I don't Google it.

[Brett]

I assume Muchumba, man.

[Chad]

I don't know. I know he's not white.

[Brady]

I'm gonna go Filipino.

[Chad]

Oh, good guess. Where does it happen? Washington, D.C. man, I'm going black.

[Brady]

Could be African.

[Chad]

That's what I. Yeah, I think. But I like your age.

[Brett]

I'm with that.

[Chad]

You think so?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Cosimba is his last name.

[Brett]

Muchimba?

[Chad]

I don't know. Brett's got that whole Filipino thing. That's a good guess, Man. I'm gonna go straight African, no black.

[Brady]

All right.

[Chad]

Like Washington, D.C. yeah. American.

[Dick Toledo]

I've got pictures.

[Chad]

All right.

[Dick Toledo]

Everybody's guessing.

[Brady]

Sure, yeah.

[Chad]

What do you say? You're saying. You're saying Africa.

[Brady]

This one's a tough one.

[Chad]

I'm saying American. Black.

[Brett]

Okay.

[Chad]

You're saying Filipino.

[Brady]

I think so.

[Chad]

I think it's a strong African. Well, you've seen it.

[Brady]

Well, I said that before.

[Chad]

Oh, that's why I pulled it up. Well, you stuck with it. Which tells me all we need to know. He's definitely black.

[Brady]

Is that a soccer jersey?

[Chad]

What Is he. Is he wearing a.

[Dick Toledo]

No, it's a U.S. postal Service.

[Chad]

Okay. I don't know. I might be right.

[Brady]

I'm out.

[Chad]

So, yeah, the Filipino is definitely the first one off the list. He's in that suit in that one. I think he's. Oh, man.

[Dick Toledo]

Hanging. Bali. Is that his wife? That's the lady that he was.

[Chad]

I think. I think I nailed it. I think I've got it.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, he's LinkedIn.

[Brady]

There we are.

[Chad]

LinkedIn. Let's see. Check out his first job.

[Dick Toledo]

CEO at Double Blue Investments. And there's a mining picture in his.

[Chad]

No, he's definitely Africa. Never mind.

[Brady]

He's got this one.

[Chad]

Diamonds on the soles of his shoes.

[Dick Toledo]

The Gemology Institute of America.

[Chad]

You might as well have Paul Simon singing in front of him. Lady Smith. Black Mombaso. Okay, I was wrong. That's a fun one. That was a tough game. I liked your Filipino guest. Could have gone anyway there.

[Brett]

Forever 21 is going out of business at the age of 40.

[Chad]

So wait a minute. They were peaked at 21, and at 40, they've expired? Brett may be on to.

[Brady]

Yep. Told you.

[Brett]

And the soda company. Poppy.

[Chad]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Pepsi just bought them for 1.6 billion.

[Chad]

No kidding. I've had them. It's pretty good.

[Brady]

What is it?

[Brett]

And I didn't know.

[Chad]

Healthier soda.

[Brett]

Shark tank in 2018.

[Chad]

Oh, good. It's.

[Brady]

I thought it was one of the CBD drinks.

[Chad]

No, I expected it to be, like. Kind of like, ugh, this is going to be.

[Dick Toledo]

There's A couple of them that are a little.

[Chad]

I didn't try all the flavors. I had two. One of them tastes a little like Dr. Pepper.

[Dick Toledo]

The grape is good.

[Chad]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Ralphie, KFC has now added fried mashed potato poppers for a limited time. You can give them on their. On their own or with a side of gravy, or in the new Dunk It. Bucket with Tenders and Fries is such.

[Chad]

An unbelievably natural happiness, even when you're just talking a little bit jokey.

[Eddie]

Don't let him shame you. Tired.

[Brett]

It's a good item, Ralphie.

[Eddie]

I heard Duncan Bucket and I in my ghost clothes. Oh, my God. Duncan Bucket.

[John]

Where's that at?

[Dick Toledo]

KFC with mashed potato poppers.

[Brett]

Yeah. Fried mashed potato pop.

[Eddie]

Man, oh, man.

[Brett]

Fried. Ralphie, I heard you.

[Dick Toledo]

Mashed potatoes. Oh, I'm in heaven Dunk.

[John]

Don't stop believing.

[Eddie]

Okay, I gotta go.

[Dick Toledo]

So much good.

[Brett]

See you, Ralphie.

[Eddie]

I'm about to bust in my angel wings right here. Good God. All right, I'll see you guys later. Bye.

[Brett]

Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that?

[Chad]

98 kpd.

[Tracy]

Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

I got some radio videos. First one's a little St. Patty's Day fallout in Pittsburgh. Okay, Patio party.

[Chad]

Oh, we're on a very small patio with an awful lot of people on it.

[Brett]

Rooftop, too.

[Chad]

There's a kid with a cowboy hat, so this will go r word fast.

[Dick Toledo]

No sound.

[Chad]

Really. Oh, geez. The whole rooftop just collapsed on those poor people village.

[Brett]

Not everyone noticed.

[Dick Toledo]

Pittsburgh.

[Chad]

Not one Steeler shirt. Just means it's the dumb side of Pittsburgh. There's an eagle shirt in that mix. I don't like this crowd at all.

[Brady]

The only green I have is green.

[Chad]

All right. There's one of those dumb Mick hats, too. God, they're the worst. Stupid.

[Brett]

Next one.

[Chad]

Oh, you.

[Brett]

Okay, Skip the one.

[Dick Toledo]

It doesn't. It's not coming up.

[Brett]

Oh, that's a good one, too.

[Dick Toledo]

It's not that. It's not that great.

[Brett]

The flaming hand. It's just. Okay.

[Brady]

Oh, find that one now.

[Chad]

Now, you two, your debate has made it so we have to see the flaming. You're telling me the flaming hand's not good? You can practically smell it.

[Brady]

Watch your mouth.

[Eddie]

Keep it down over there.

[Dick Toledo]

Was he handling KFC poppers?

[Chad]

What is it? Describe it.

[Brett]

A kid was basically doing a stun karate board, and they light his hand on fire and the rest of his body catches on fire.

[Chad]

Oh, gee, that does sound pretty. Yeah, it's a child who burns down his whole body.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chad]

I mean, I. From Brady's description, a kid trying to karate chop a board and his whole body bursts into flames.

[Brett]

Ms. Poor by dad and dad's involved or his instructor.

[Chad]

Can't imagine. Dad was.

[Brady]

Wait a minute. I actually may have that video.

[Chad]

Okay.

[Brady]

I have something similar to it if that's not it. So we'll cheat in a little bit.

[Chad]

But Toledo. You don't like that video?

[Dick Toledo]

I didn't say I didn't like it. It was just.

[Chad]

It's not as good as.

[Brady]

It wasn't as good of a sell.

[Chad]

I mean, Brady sold was better. I'm buying. I'm buying that. I'm getting a clear coat on that. I want that. Again, a childlikes. Tell me this isn't, like, from the handbook of how to talk to John. Do you want to see a video where a kid lights his hand on fire and tries to karate chop a board, but his whole body bursts into flames? I'm like, when am I ever gonna say no to that?

[Brady]

I think I do have. I think I do have the video.

[Chad]

Yeah, that's like, the most awesome show. It now might be the most awesome description I've ever heard of. Anything and you say, not so good. Well, now it's built up to the point where this kid better burst into big flame.

[Dick Toledo]

Let's get to this one. I'll try and find it. I think I got it.

[Brett]

This one's a little piece training. I don't know if we've seen this one before, but.

[Chad]

Oh, my God, there's a. Oh, it is the Russians. They drive a car on two wheels over. Oh, and it's over. A bunch of dudes who have volunteered to kind of lay down on the ground, and the car falls on one of them and drags him around. That's terribly stupid. That's a really.

[Brady]

I mean, it's no kids claiming hand, you know?

[Chad]

Again, awesome. Just the concept of, like, I could chop that board in half with my hand and start a fire with it. Do that immediately.

[Brett]

This is for baseball. Okay, guys, the comment says he should play for the Mets. You got to hear the sound on this, okay?

[Chad]

Oh, Jesus. The dude just start beating another person in the school streets, and people are laughing. Some guy just came up with a board and hit another dude in the head two times. Was it a bad person?

[Brett]

Yeah. Was he still. In the case of.

[Chad]

It's like Troy Palomalo just shoots out of nowhere and beats up a man with a stick. And people laugh. Oh, I mean, the first shot is a. He drops a 12 pack of soda in his back. That's crazy. There's no reasoning for this. Was that guy hand on fire? Because that would make it. Why did Moana get so mad at that black guy?

[Dick Toledo]

Mystery.

[Brady]

All right, F. Around and find out.

[Chad]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Last one's a frozen flip. The guy's still standing on a fuel fence. And you got to hear the sound on this.

[Chad]

It says the guy broke his neck. He's standing on a fence, and it's ice. It's like 2 degrees. Does a backflip. Oh. And then he hits his face on the fence that he's trying to do a backflip off of. Oh, my God.

[Brady]

It's gotta be in Boston.

[Chad]

Yeah, That's a broken neck. Yeah. This is. Yo, bro, here's your Borg. Here's your Borg. All right, that's it.

[Brady]

It's too cold for my Mick. Hat bird sucks.

[Chad]

Bring me a flaming boy.

[Brady]

I think I got the flaming flame hands.

[Chad]

Wait, let me rephrase that.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, exactly.

[Chad]

I need a flaming boy, and I need one now. All right, all right, Here we go.

[Brady]

I think this is it.

[Chad]

This is flaming boy. Oh, my God. That's. He's a little chubby. Oh, it might be his dad. Brady's right. Oh, his hands on fire. And he talked karate chop. And he tries to blow his hand, and it doesn't go out. And now he. Now he starts on guitar. The whole place is burning up. This is the best video I've ever watched. Kalito, you're out of your mind. How in the heat, you get fire. You get fire. It's like the scarecrow. That was awesome.

[Brett]

What's your problem, man?

[Chad]

How in the world did you say that's not that good? The whole stage went up.

[Dick Toledo]

I was just trying to move on.

[Chad]

His whole goal was to just chop. We got time just to chop two pieces of wood with a flaming hand. And his whole body went up. And the stage. Show it again, Brett.

[Brady]

All right, hang on. Pull it back up.

[Chad]

I loved it.

[Brett]

It's either his dad or sensei.

[Chad]

Yeah, there's an. There's an adult present. There's a crowd. I didn't realize this was going to be. He's got three boards, too. Hands on fire. Chops it, immediately starts blowing on his hand. The better part is, oh, my God, everyone's on fire. This is awesome.

[Brady]

So Kevin from Discover Cards is never going to be the same.

[Chad]

Your bill can go.

[Brady]

Be able to dial those numbers anywhere.

[Chad]

You're not getting a call today. If you're behind on your Discover card. The whole place burned down. The best part is the guy that lights the kid's hand on fire, he's the same one on the banner behind. That's putting together this Tony Robbins of India type. It is. Yeah.

[Brett]

Life changers.

[Chad]

Yeah, he's. He's life coaching people. I don't know, how empowering is it to be 14 and chop three boards up with a flaming hand? How bad if.

[Brett]

Let me put it out with more.

[Chad]

Alcohol, with more of whatever this liquid is. I've got liquid.

[Brett]

This will not water.

[Chad]

Don't panic. I've got it.

[John]

Whoops.

[Chad]

Gasoline. Oh, that's a great video. Toledo. You're out of your mind. All right, Brett. All right.

[Brady]

Here's some. Some parking lot action.

[Chad]

Oops. Guy in a moped, he's fired up. These Russians. I tells you what, we do not want to go to war with them.

[Brett]

That was a doozy.

[Chad]

Guy crashed into the side of a car, and the car runs him over completely. Oh, we're in Asia. Never mind.

[Brett]

Not Russia.

[Chad]

You. Yeah, he's got the five finger death walk going. He's up, he's walking around. He went under the car. All four tires ran over his head, and he's.

[Brett]

One tire was walking away.

[Chad]

Yeah, front and back tires go over. That's a good hoodie. That's the most powerful hoodie I've ever seen. All right, that's. We're two in a row with that.

[Brady]

Here's one. This guy.

[Chad]

I don't know.

[Brady]

Somebody's after him.

[Chad]

Okay. He's leaving a store.

[Brett]

We got a assassination.

[Chad]

He looks over his shoulder. He's walking down the street. Surveillance camera catching him, and he's getting pretty far away now. Not sure what's going on. Oh, here's a car just points itself at him and hits him. This is a Sopranos moment. Oh, it hits him again. Second one does the trick. Yeah, Guy drove up on the sidewalk. Yeah, that dude was definitely targeted there. He's still up. Does he get it again? He doesn't even seem nervous that this car just ran him over twice. And the guy just backed up. He's gonna do it again.

[Brady]

He must be banging somebody's girl or something.

[Dick Toledo]

What's the timing, though, man?

[Brady]

Yeah, catch him right there.

[Chad]

He is leaving the AT T store. All right.

[Brady]

And I think we've seen something like this one before.

[Chad]

Oh, God. This guy's got.

[Brett]

Wild Bill.

[Chad]

He took out his whole. Oh, I'll explain it. Don't wor where his right eye should be. He has a giant hole and then he takes out his entire top. It's his whole palace, whole pallet. He. He tried to kill himself by putting a shotgun or gun in his mouth and it went out his eye.

[Dick Toledo]

So he's got half pallet.

[Chad]

And it blew his. Blew his pallet off and went out his eye. Oh, he takes his whole set of. And he sticks his finger in his palate. Dirty finger out of the eye hole. Yeah. He's not clean. He hasn't made a lot of good decisions.

[Brady]

Nice hair.

[Chad]

His hair is the worst part of it. I very rarely look at somebody with a hole where their eyes should be and go get a haircut.

[Brady]

Right.

[Dick Toledo]

By the way, is. Is that like a Amco mechanics jersey?

[Brady]

It's some kind of factory trained something or other.

[Brett]

Is he certified?

[Chad]

He's delivering snap on.

[Dick Toledo]

That's it. It was more snap on there.

[Chad]

He's got. Got your new order. It's coming today. Don't look him in the eye.

[Brady]

There's that broad you run into a two in the morning at the bar. Oh, oh, it's clean.

[Chad]

Okay. Running down the street with no pants on. It looks pretty good following you, bro. Now she's running back towards.

[Brett]

Oh, hell no.

[Chad]

Totally naked brother.

[Brett]

Snake bro.

[Chad]

Get back. Oh, and then she just starts peeing for no reason. Just starts firing out of her.

[Dick Toledo]

What the hell?

[Chad]

I agree.

[Brady]

That's worth a play again.

[Chad]

Yeah, she just screamed and peed real hard. She ran up a road and back with no pants on and then screamed and sprayed something on like a skunk.

[Brady]

And you got to give this guy.

[Chad]

Jesus Christ, we've got a lot of these today.

[Brady]

Got to give this guy credit. He's making the best of a bad situation.

[Chad]

We're on a windowsill. He's looking out at a cruddy alley. There's a guy in a wheelchair.

[Dick Toledo]

It.

[Brett]

Oh, he's getting feed.

[Chad]

Oh, there's somebody blowing a guy in a wheelchair right there in an alley.

[Brady]

I didn't watch when they stop.

[Chad]

And some guys on like three, it's like three floors up watching.

[Brady]

Done.

[Chad]

Oh, how about that? The old lady comes up for air for a second and then Thriller grabs her and pulls her right back down. The guy in the wheelchair is like, no, no, no, I'm not getting many of these. I know when I'm finished and we'll paid, we'll end.

[Brady]

This one apparently paid for the hour.

[Chad]

Wow.

[Brady]

Apparently in the urban dictionary, this one is recognized as whale C word blowhole.

[Chad]

Oh, that's a fun game to play. With kids. Oh, man. All right. What am I looking at? This is guy is another guy stuffing his balls? No, his whole pee pee is in his bottom. His whole pee pee is bent backwards into his own bottom. Wow, he's enjoying it. That's his well shaved. Like that's a ready for vasectomy shave he's got going on. Oh, geez. It popped out. He finished. He finished himself, literally. Golf yourself if that's what that guy just did. There's a money shot. You bastard.

[Brady]

We'll save that one.

[Chad]

Save that one.

[Brady]

That'll be a top tenner.

[Dick Toledo]

We have an update from your friend.

[Chad]

Good Lord. Oh, Tracy's in the hospital.

[Dick Toledo]

Thank you for all your concern. I'm doing okay now. Doctors say it was food poisoning. Appreciate my MSG family for taking such good care of me.

[Chad]

It isn't food poisoning.

[Dick Toledo]

Shout out the crew that had to clean that up. Appreciate you. More importantly, the Knicks are now one. And oh, when I throw up on the court. So maybe I'll have to break it out again in the playoffs.

[Tracy]

That basically means that I'm going to get drunk and throw up on the floor again. That's an excuse.

[Chad]

It's good luck.

[Dick Toledo]

You just set things up.

[Tracy]

My pukin blood equals good luck. Ironically, most of the time when people are throwing up and bleeding, it's a WNBA game.

[Dick Toledo]

Are we calling that the Brunson?

[Tracy]

Tracy, call it whatever you want. I feel better. How you guys want some popcorn?

[Chad]

I'm sorry.

[Tracy]

Get a wheelchair.

[Chad]

Bad clan. Nobody's ever thrown up so hard they needed a wheelchair. There's more to the story. I feel bad for Tracy, but put.

[Tracy]

A little Febreze on that.

[Chad]

That'll be all right.

[Tracy]

Nick's won't even smell it.

[Chad]

Please welcome everybody at Madison Square Garden, the great Tracy Morgan.

[Tracy]

Oh, my God. I'm on the jumbo.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, my God.

[Tracy]

My God. I'm up on that Jumbotron.

[Chad]

Puking people.

[Tracy]

Never gonna forget this.

[Brett]

He'll be in the sweets from now on.

[Chad]

I'm a legend.

[Tracy]

I performed at Madison Square Garden. Everybody had eyes on me. That's show business. Take that, Mikhail Bridge. Just watch your step downtown.

[Chad]

Anyway, yeah, projectile vomiting and then a wheelchair is more than just a bad hot dog. You're something's bad going on. I'm worried about Tracy. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady report. It's 98k upd.

[Dick Toledo]

It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually.

[Brett]

No membership fee.

[Chad]

Had enough of this.