← Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
03-24-25 - FULL SHOW - MONDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD
02:33:19
Loading summary
Transcript989 lines
- [00:00]
Dick Toledo
It's Dick Toledo and new customers right now on FanDuel. Get $150 in bonus bets when your first $5 wager wins. Just visit FanDuel.com KUPD to grab $150 in college hoops bonus bets with a winning $5 bet and prepare for March on FanDuel America's 1 Sportsbook 21 plus in President Arizona first online real money wager only. $5. First deposit required. Bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets which expire seven days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See terms@sportsbook.fanduel.com gambling problem. Call 1-800-next- step or text Next Step to War II.
- [00:32]
Brady
You're listening to the HMS Podcast brought to you by mmpguns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.
- [00:48]
John Holmberg
Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Monday. It's 5:45. Good morning sickness. My name's John, there's Brady, there's Brett, and there's big Dick Toledo. That's us. Like it or not, we're still. What a weekend. Crazy stuff. And we had of course Ron Capps in the NHRA this week. We just got an email right off the bat first thing today, Gabriel Verdugo emails See Caps he blew up. Yeah, Brady said he didn't get to see it, but rumor is through knowing caps and all that had him on the show on Thursday. Bashed him to the wall, blew his car up, walked right away. That's amazing out there at those drag races, how often crazy stuff happens and they just get up and walk out.
- [01:31]
Brett
Of there and just like technology and just everything that they've done in that.
- [01:35]
John Holmberg
Ca whole thing, it just, I mean to think about that kind of power and that much fuel and all that, just amazing. So it's good to hear that. Caps had a wreck yesterday. So it the.
- [01:47]
Brett
And he was running good.
- [01:48]
John Holmberg
Gotta say, if I was him, I don't want this to be the case. I wouldn't come here anymore. I gotta figure he's been here 20 years and won like twice. There's certain aspect of that starts to be like change up your routine. It's not us. It might be. It's not me, it's you. Right? It's like. But no, I think, I think for, you know, if you're 7, 2 and 17, you fire the media guys. I gotta feel like we're a little responsible for that. If every time you come to town you do the same things and it's the ritual, you know, it's those superstitions you put a quarter in your shoe, you shave one eyebrow off, you go visit the morning sickness and then you've only won twice out of 20 times. Maybe you stop doing that. I don't want it to be the case. I want him to keep doing it. But I'm starting to feel a little partially responsible just a little bit when I, you know, I've probably gotten the caps blew up email a lot more than I have. Caps won again. I don't know how many times he's won Phoenix. Probably three or four maybe. I don't know. Taking a shot. I know it's drastically low compared to how many times he's visited and I've loved every time he's visited Jesus. I mean you think about it. One of the guys that initially got him to us died for crying out loud. I mean some of the people he's around are dying that knew us and we might not be the best luck for Ron Capps is what I'm saying.
- [03:09]
Brett
Well, nothing had to do with it. You are had a drink Hard racing.
- [03:13]
John Holmberg
Team Look Brady, here we go again with you trying to blame alcohol for why that happened. That had nothing to do with it.
- [03:20]
Brett
It did.
- [03:21]
John Holmberg
He wasn't a hard living to the point where it killed him or we'd all be dead except you. Brett and I would have been dead.
- [03:27]
Brady
Months ago, man, if not years ago.
- [03:29]
John Holmberg
I would have died Friday for crying out loud. Had a great time Friday night me and Marty went to the Sun's game and drank ourselves silly and then went over to that IHOP that's got a bar in it and went bananas. It was fun. But yeah. So look, we don't always have happen to you when you drink. I know a good thing to tell Kirby. Drinking causes lumps. I've got friends. They're in the ground. But yeah, I mean, you know, but good luck to Caps. I hope it all works out. We had George Foreman on the show. He died too. I mean, God, it never ends. Now we actually had George Foreman on the show once on the phone, right? It was on the phone. Let me, let me be the one who tells the truth. It was on the phone. I forget what he was promoting. It might have been that old man show he did. It might have been something else. He was promoting something and it was funny. He was very funny. Toledo will probably remember. So he's got that the. The miserable awful person who used to work at this station and still lingers around this black cloud. I mean you want to talk about tumor that lives in this City. His name is Dave Pratt, and he used to do the morning show here at KUPD years ago. Awful human being. Awful, awful Human Being. One of the biggest liars you'll ever meet in your life. Put a post out that. You didn't see it?
- [04:41]
Brady
No, I'm gonna look at it.
- [04:42]
John Holmberg
Because he does a thing now. He does a thing where any celebrity that dies, he then lies about how well he knew them and puts out a story, essentially a eulogy, about himself and his relationship, which is with this super celebrity, which is always a wizard at it. Well, it's actually pretty formulaic, and I have proof of that because I know someone who puts out his eulogy before him, and it's usually pretty close. Although the Dave Pratt lies page. Not Dave Pratt lie. Dave Pratt lies page. The eulogy was for George Forearm and had a picture of George Lopez, because so often the facts are lost. It's a very good one. However Pratt puts out this eulogy, he can't help himself. It's a dead man, for crying out loud. Had him on the show a million times. Loved it. I remember the one time he's on the show. I wish. I wish I'd have kept the Foreman griller that he gave me because I had my very small studio apartment. He used the Foreman griller that George gave him while he was in his studio apartment. This was no earlier than, like, Dave. Dave always brags about how successful he was, how he was making 20 grand a weekend just from bars that wanted him to come. Be there. Appearances. That would be like, hey, if you just show up, we'll give you $10,000. But in 1994, he lived in a small studio apartment and got a George Foreman griller he didn't even know how to get. Like, that's when the Foreman grill came out. 94. 91. 94.
- [06:09]
Brady
No, I'm sorry, 94, 31 years ago.
- [06:11]
John Holmberg
Either way, why do it? Why does this insufferable anus constantly do this? It's a dead man. I don't understand it, but there it is, and it's out there. So George Foreman dying was, to me, usurped by the fact that Dave Pratt couldn't keep his grubby paws off the corpse for a second just to say, hey, what a career. We'll miss you, George. Nope. It was about some made up nonsense where this douchebag had a George Foreman grill handed to him by. And by the way, even if George Foreman did put that grill out in the early 80s, when Dave first had a show and was Poor and all that other stuff, which he always brags he wasn't. Anyway, he was. He was a recluse through the 80s. George Foreman went through so many problems. He didn't do local radio shows in the 80s.
- [07:06]
Brett
Well, Dave didn't go into details there. He got the prototype.
- [07:09]
John Holmberg
That's what I said on my text to the guy who sent it to me. I'm like, oh, well, yeah. I mean, initially, he got the original Foreman Grill, and he started to use it. Never told anybody. You know, I've had one for 13 years. I'm surprised it took you this long to get them to the public. I can make hamburgers at home. All right, buddy. I've been making those on your Foreman Griller.
- [07:29]
Brady
All right, well, he wanted to call it the Sex Machine Grill, but he said, no, George, you should call it the George Foreman Grill.
- [07:35]
John Holmberg
That's great. I like that. The Sex Machine Grill. Until it was night. I think that's a little too much me. People are gonna associate with me. So I say you call it the George Foreman Grill. Get some names on that.
- [07:45]
Brett
All right, buddy.
- [07:47]
John Holmberg
For those of you not familiar with Dave Pratt, congratulations. You're lucky. I've hated him for ages. And some people who've been around the Val. Remember. You remember what it was for Rich? Why. Why was Foreman on our show?
- [08:05]
Dick Toledo
So there was a cacophony going on that morning. We had Chris Jericho in studio. We had Kelly Kelly in studio.
- [08:12]
John Holmberg
Was that the day that he.
- [08:13]
Dick Toledo
They were there for? That was the day they spilled all the beans.
- [08:15]
John Holmberg
They had an affair in the bathroom. Right.
- [08:17]
Dick Toledo
And Ralphie was in that morning as well. So it was Ralphie, Chris Jericho, Kelly Kelly. And. And Foreman called and about at the end of their hour.
- [08:27]
John Holmberg
Okay, so 50% of the guests that day are dead. Right? Right. Crazy. Ah, this show's been on too long.
- [08:35]
Dick Toledo
That was 2009.
- [08:38]
John Holmberg
Wasn't that long ago.
- [08:41]
Brett
I was in a studio apartment then. 2009.
- [08:44]
John Holmberg
Yeah, yeah, I remember. I was living on the streets. Cause we'd only been on for eight years. That's right. Brady and I were trying. We were struggling to make ends meet. We were. In fact, I forgot. Rich is right. We called George Foreman and begged him for a grill. Cause we were starving. We couldn't make ends meet at all. Eight years in. What a douchebag. That guy is, like, up and down, just miserable. I remember when cancer caught him. Remember that? For a while, and he was running around saying, ah, I got cancer. I'm like, opposite. Cancer has you. And then cancer cured itself. Of Dave. And I was never happier for cancer in my life.
- [09:16]
Brady
It's like Magic Johnson you just got rid of.
- [09:18]
John Holmberg
It just. It just went away. But, man, when I heard it, I'm like, oh, poor, poor cancer to be afflicted with that. Oh. And then cancer said, no, I'm gonna fight it off. And he did, and it went away. Good for cancer. Proudia. Cancer. Anyway, horrible person. Just a thief and a liar and a terrible human being. I saw something on Friday. There's a certain level of celebrity, like, radio's pretty pathetic, right? Like, our. Our celebrity status is fairly embarrassing. Almost like you feel. I feel bad for anybody who is excited to meet me. I felt that way since I was a kid, but I feel pretty bad. Like, if someone's excited to see Brady, like, oh, I automatically assume you're going through something. Like, I don't think that you've got a good life going. And I appreciate it, but I really think the bar's too low for you to be like. And it happens now and again where somebody's way too happy to meet me or you or Brett. I saw something on Friday that might be worse, and yet the guy is, like, leaps and bounds. Real famous by comparison. That Suns game on Friday, and a lady came over to me and said, do you know who that is in the corner? Now, she knows I do the show, so she's kind of like. And I'm like, I don't know who that is. She points in the corner, and I can't really see people running around like, who am I looking at? She goes to the corner. I look, and I'm like, oh, my God. That's A.C. slater from Saved by the Bell. That's Mario Lopez.
- [10:48]
Brady
Oh, man.
- [10:48]
John Holmberg
Seems like a hell of a nice guy. Always has, always will. But every single person saw him and went, There was no. I'm gonna go over and talk to Slater. There's like, no. I felt bad for him. He's just so. They. Everyone left him alone. Completely and utterly left him alone. Devin Booker comes into the same place a little bit later with his dad, and his dad sign an autograph just for giving the sperms out to make Devin Booker. Oh, that's all that. That dude had more everybody going, oh, my God, you're his dad. Sign my hat. Like, what for? Your sperm's made Devin Booker. And we like him a lot. Little line for sperms and autographs. Mario Lopez sat quietly, ate it, and everybody's like, eh, eh.
- [11:36]
Brett
There's Mario with an entourage. Or was it just a group of.
- [11:38]
John Holmberg
Friends, you know, sitting in the corner having dinner, showgirls.
- [11:41]
Brady
We all seen Jessie Spano's cans, so we didn't care. All right, dude, you're not the only one anymore.
- [11:45]
John Holmberg
Strong point that if the only person from Saved by the Bell that sat down in that booth, I'd be like, man, there's Jesse Spano. I might, I might get closer. Yeah, poor Mario Lopez. He sat there, host of Access Hollywood. It's been solid career for years and years and years, and every single person, I would point it out. I'm like, look over there. There's Mario Lopez. And people look at me and go. So I'm like, no, don't sell. That guy's done, like, he's the one we should be rooting for. He's done it right. Handsome man. Fitness, you know, no scam. And that's the problem. He's just boring. He's just Mario Lopez. He's meh. And he really hasn't done anything outside of Saved by the Bell. But generationally, that should be something. You know, Zack and Cody roll into a room and people flip out. Mario Lopez should have 50 year old broads just throwing, gushing on him. Didn't. And I felt terrible for him because I had more people coming up to me going, hey, love the show, man, than I did him. Cause it's Access Hollywood. Nobody loves Access Hollywood. Everybody just knows who he is. It was sad. Dave Pratt said that he saw Mario on Friday night and remembered that when he went to Bayside high school with A.C. slater, he beat him in the state wrestling championship championship. But he still gave AC the trophy. Everybody remembers that, Dave. Just a quality great stuff. But the passing of George Foreman bothered me. And I don't know why. It's just. I think it's because I need. I need my celebrities to get sick first. I can't be blindsided by a death. I didn't know George was in trouble. He's 76. I mean, it can happen, but I didn't know that George had that thing. So it makes you kind of just get on. Get on edge a little bit for like, who's next? What's going on? You know, when George Foreman, the news broke, and I forget who told me, he said, george Foreman's dead. And that's how I got told that George Foreman was no longer alive. Ah, you can't do that.
- [13:47]
Brady
Where'd he die of? I didn't read up on it, to be honest with you.
- [13:50]
John Holmberg
Just being old, I think he just had a heart attack. He was Actually, people said he was sick, he was in a bed and his family knew, so I guess he wasn't doing great. But man, oh man, that one's Stings.
- [14:00]
Brett
Yeah, there's, they're not really saying no.
- [14:02]
John Holmberg
Word, but I mean, if you as a fan of any sport or any human endeavor, want to take some time out of your life in the next few days and pay tribute to what is one of the most amazing things in American culture that was worldwide. Watch When We Were Kings. It's a documentary about the grumble in the jungle. Yeah, it's the, the fight in Zaire.
- [14:27]
Brett
Had no idea. I mean, I was young when that was.
- [14:30]
John Holmberg
Yeah, I don't think anybody knew. Well, I mean, if you were young, you knew it was a big deal. It was a worldwide event, it was true world fame before the Internet, before all this stuff, like these guys had achieved something that just, I mean, that was global. And you watch When We Were Kings, Ali fights Foreman. And if you knew the careers of both. And if you ever watch a documentary, there's a documentary on the CW about Joe Frazier, another guy in that mix at that time. And then the documentaries about Foreman who became a wild, you know, self destructive human being for about 10 years. And then somewhere in the 90s, invents that weird little grill and becomes America's dad and starts fighting again in his 40s and wins the championship, like quits for 10 years, comes back, goes, I'll try again. And he beats a guy named Michael Moore and puts him out. And it's kind of big fat old man champion, old 38 year old champion. But he looked like he was 90 and then he lived it for a while, but it was proof at the time. And I always say this, that when you, you know, take 10 years off and you come back and you champ up again, something's wrong with your sport. And that's a fact that you can't be like, it makes old people happy when old people win stuff and that's it. But when an old man wins, it's like, oh, something's wrong with the sport because old people aren't supposed to win things. Dudes pushing 40, 45 shouldn't be on top of a sport that's, you know, not a seniors division. You never see that in the Olympics. He's back after a 10 year layoff, he's 41 years old. And look at him blazing past the competition. It's nuts. But something's wrong with the sport if a guy is out running or outperforming younger People, it's just not a thing. I say that on the heels of my Steelers signing Aaron Rodgers. I'm not excited about this. No one is. I don't want a 40 year old man in charge of anything.
- [16:26]
Dick Toledo
Well, to back up your point, so the reason he was calling that morning was he was chilling away for his new website, let george clean it.com, which is no longer available. I had to find it on the Internet.
- [16:37]
John Holmberg
Time machine didn't do well.
- [16:38]
Dick Toledo
No, George Wood didn't do well.
- [16:41]
John Holmberg
I come clean your house.
- [16:42]
Dick Toledo
He had all kinds of cleaning products that he was offering on his. Let georgeclean it.
- [16:47]
John Holmberg
George Foreman had his face on like Clorox bottles.
- [16:50]
Dick Toledo
Oh, the smiling face on everything.
- [16:52]
Brady
Dave would have only helped him.
- [16:54]
John Holmberg
Dave probably, you know, took it all and used it without paying for it, house and home.
- [16:59]
Dick Toledo
In 2009, Dave was only 15 years.
- [17:01]
John Holmberg
Removed from his studio apartment, from that dance. He was barely making it. Probably trying to scrub up that two bedroom he just got into. Crazy. Well, I'll miss that guy. I love George Foreman and that old man show that he was on with Henry Winkler and Jeff Dye and Brad Shaw, Shatner, he was the one where he walked away going, man, what a huggable and lovable man. George Foreman, he just seemed great.
- [17:26]
Brett
He had, I saw an interview with him, read about it and he got an endorsement that Hulk Hogan passed on. And he said that endorsement, I couldn't remember the how many, but he goes, at one time I was getting $8 million a month.
- [17:42]
John Holmberg
What? Oh, and you remember, I think it.
- [17:46]
Brett
Was like aarp, some kind of thing with that.
- [17:49]
John Holmberg
What? That can't be right. Brady, I'm gonna go ahead and. Don't reach for your phone. You're telling stories. You gotta stick with what you say. Eight million a month, that's an awful lot of money.
- [18:01]
Brett
That doesn't mean it was, you know, at one point in time he's like, I got. I was getting $8 million a month.
- [18:06]
John Holmberg
Yeah, but that's 8 million a month. Like I just said, at one point in time, if you're getting 8 million a month, that's 8 million a month no matter what point in time it is. That's a hell of a lot of money for George Foreman. But depends, I want to know.
- [18:17]
Brett
Married five times and 12 children and.
- [18:19]
John Holmberg
Almost all the boys are named George. He's just an interesting person. You're going to have to go back and do some research on your own story because I am wildly curious of what pays 8 million a month. Back in the 90s for a old boxer to give endorsement that they were going to give to Hulk Hogan in the first. What were they going to give Hulk if he was choice one? You had to fall to George Foreman afterwards. My God, Brady's right.
- [18:44]
Brady
There was a. What was it says There was months I was being paid 8 million per month.
- [18:47]
Brett
He told AARP it was an interview.
- [18:50]
Brady
I think it was. I think it was basically the.
- [18:53]
John Holmberg
He was like endorsing aarp.
- [18:55]
Brett
No, no, no.
- [18:56]
John Holmberg
That was the interview. Got it.
- [18:57]
Brady
Yeah.
- [18:58]
John Holmberg
All right. But he never. It looks like grill. No. What if it was the grill? The grill. I could imagine. So it wasn't like. Yeah, that makes.
- [19:05]
Brady
Wasn't anything else. It was the grill.
- [19:06]
John Holmberg
So maybe they were saying that originally the idea was to give it to Hulk Hogan. Hulk Hogan super Griller. And then he took that and it was.
- [19:12]
Brett
Yes.
- [19:12]
John Holmberg
That thing was the most successful home. I had two of them. I used to use that George Foreman griller like crazy. And then when they. They. They changed it up a little and made a better grease catcher because that was the big problem with Foreman Griller. It ran downhill. And all that gunk came out of there cleaning. It sucked.
- [19:30]
Brett
In baseball clubhouses and the major league baseball griller.
- [19:34]
Brady
Any single dude with a studio apartment.
- [19:37]
John Holmberg
Dave Pratt.
- [19:38]
Brady
Yeah, exactly.
- [19:39]
John Holmberg
It was. Yeah. If you grew up in the 90s, you had a grill. If you were in college in the 90s at all, you had at least one grill. I. I wish. Do they still sell them? Just thinking about it. I buy one, then they did the double. Oh, and the two. You could shut one double cook it. So it wasn't. Oh, it was amazing. What an invention. And so simple. And one of the best episodes.
- [20:10]
Brett
Never owned one.
- [20:11]
John Holmberg
You never had a George.
- [20:12]
Brady
You probably looked down an American.
- [20:14]
John Holmberg
You probably looked down on it, didn't you? You. It was. Yeah. You didn't think it could possibly. I'm telling you what. What you did.
- [20:20]
Brett
We had so many grilling options.
- [20:21]
John Holmberg
Now you cheated yourself.
- [20:23]
Brett
I did indoor grilling the first time I had one. A burger made.
- [20:27]
John Holmberg
Oh, that's not a Foreman griller.
- [20:29]
Brett
Wow, that does a great job.
- [20:32]
John Holmberg
Well, it's just hot. I mean, everything does a great job.
- [20:35]
Brett
To cook, to panini press for hamburger.
- [20:38]
John Holmberg
It was. And then he had the. Oh, damn it all. What an invention. Indoor grilling. I'm surprised you. I'm surprised you weren't all. It is. What a fantastic thing.
- [20:51]
Brady
35 bucks.
- [20:52]
John Holmberg
And for some reason I don't have one. But you know what? Today they're only $35.
- [20:57]
Brady
Yeah, that's the four serving version, too.
- [21:00]
John Holmberg
Add to cart.
- [21:03]
Brady
Oh, here's one you can wash in the dishwasher. They came, they upgraded fully.
- [21:07]
John Holmberg
Submersible.
- [21:07]
Brett
That's the one you want.
- [21:09]
John Holmberg
Add that to cart.
- [21:10]
Brady
50 bucks.
- [21:12]
John Holmberg
What do you mean? You unplug it and stuff it in the dishwasher. The whole thing?
- [21:16]
Brady
Yeah.
- [21:16]
John Holmberg
Oh, my. Oh, no. You take pieces.
- [21:18]
Brady
Still the griddles. That's all that matters, though.
- [21:20]
John Holmberg
That's. Yeah. I'm not talking. Oh, my God. Add to cart.
- [21:25]
Brady
Vertical storage. Everything, man.
- [21:27]
John Holmberg
Made it like a PlayStation 3.
- [21:29]
Brady
Look at that.
- [21:30]
John Holmberg
It was. It was a. It was horizontal storage before.
- [21:33]
Brady
Very clumsy serving version, too.
- [21:36]
John Holmberg
What?
- [21:37]
Brady
Got a five serving version. Two.
- [21:38]
John Holmberg
Five servings.
- [21:39]
Brett
Give them the five.
- [21:41]
John Holmberg
I could have guests.
- [21:43]
Brett
That's for the five marriages. Add to cart.
- [21:48]
Brady
Adjustable temperature. Man, this thing. This thing got high tech all of a sudden.
- [21:52]
John Holmberg
All mine was. Was on or off.
- [21:54]
Brady
That's it.
- [21:54]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Hot. Not hot. Don't touch. Touch. Oh, it was great. You never had to put butter.
- [22:01]
Brett
You know what? Two of those, Brad.
- [22:02]
John Holmberg
Two of those. Add two to cart. Can't get enough. Break Brady down.
- [22:07]
Brady
He's gonna get one finally.
- [22:08]
John Holmberg
And then what? You know what we'll do? We'll pour the grease up for our homie. We're gonna put it in a cup and pour it out outside for our man George Love Geor. All of those dudes are dead. Half of that show we did the day George Foreman was on is dead. That's a good story. That's better than Pratt's lie. Ralphie May was here, dead. George Forno was here, dead. Same day, Chris Jericho. They come in threes, my friend. It's either you or Kelly Kelly. And also that was the day that Chris Jericho, wrestling superstar, brought that gorgeous girl Kelly Kelly in and then had to run to the bathroom to talk to his wife. And people overheard him.
- [22:47]
Brett
Well, I went to the bathroom.
- [22:48]
John Holmberg
Oh, that was you?
- [22:48]
Brett
Yeah.
- [22:49]
John Holmberg
Whispering and stuff. That things that this isn't what it seems and it might leak out. And they were. Yeah, he was boning Kelly. Kelly. We asked him and they kind of laughed and like, something's going on here. And obviously they had just finished sperms in each other and they came in a little bit post coital. You know, nothing came of it. I think it was on a couple of websites. Wow. But some. A couple of the websites popped up later that said on a radio show in Phoenix, this and this. And this happened. I was one of our listeners that's into wrestling fired off all the information to some wrestling blog back in 2009 when we didn't know what the hell we were doing. Crazy. What a show that. What a show that was. I'm telling you right now. I guarantee you. Go back and listen. It's clumsy if I got that many guests in a room.
- [23:46]
Brady
With Ralphie too.
- [23:47]
John Holmberg
Ralph. I don't know if Ralphie stayed. Ralphie was here. Ralphie stuck around.
- [23:51]
Brady
So Toledo was saying I don't know.
- [23:52]
John Holmberg
Yeah, he was here the whole day. I remember Ralphie and Chris Jericho. I don't remember George Foreman on the phone with Ralphie. Chris Jericho and Kelly Kelly. Unless they left already. And then Ralphie and Georgian. They're dead now.
- [24:03]
Brady
You've always had the weirdest combos for interviews. I mean like Jericho and Foreman.
- [24:07]
John Holmberg
Want to know a weirder one? And Batista. Batista and Bob Sachs.
- [24:11]
Brady
Well, I remember the Jesse James Dupree and Maynard.
- [24:15]
John Holmberg
Maynard Tools. Tools. And that was one of my favorites because that was when Jesse James Dupree was. He's the lead singer of something called Jackal. And he was so uncomfortable with me and Maynard kind of arguing because I told Maynard I just didn't want to tolerate his that day because the guy from Jackal was so much fun. How did you make it so bad that I want the dude from Jackal to talk more?
- [24:36]
Dick Toledo
How so you turned the show over to Jericho that morning?
- [24:41]
John Holmberg
Oh, I did.
- [24:41]
Dick Toledo
Chris Jericho show.
- [24:42]
John Holmberg
Oh, fantastic.
- [24:43]
Dick Toledo
Let him kind of lead for an hour.
- [24:45]
John Holmberg
Kind of a fear based. You do it. I'm scared of this whole mess. There's too many people in here. And he did a nice job. So he. Did he interview Foreman with you?
- [24:54]
Brady
Yeah.
- [24:54]
John Holmberg
Oh, fantastic. I'm a genius.
- [24:57]
Dick Toledo
And Ralphie too.
- [25:00]
John Holmberg
And we should have turned it over to Ralphie to talk about that grill. He grilled everything. I'm sure, I'm sure Ralphie's house looked like a. You know, one of those guys that spin.
- [25:11]
Brett
There's one in every room.
- [25:12]
John Holmberg
He's just spinning. Foreman grills.
- [25:14]
Brady
Oh, man. They have a smokeless version of the grill now too. What's that? 85 less smoke from the George Foreman grill.
- [25:20]
John Holmberg
How. I don't know what will AI.
- [25:23]
Brady
How much that it's actually on sale. 51 off. 40 bucks. Touch display and everything they got.
- [25:32]
John Holmberg
It's like a printer. Oh, George Foreman. How I'm gonna miss you. Wow, that dude's got asparagus on there. I know Brady, seems like a crime to you, but that looks delicious to me. Doing putting greens on it. He's ruining it.
- [25:47]
Dick Toledo
40 bucks.
- [25:48]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [25:49]
Brady
The price is 1% off.
- [25:50]
Dick Toledo
Right now that's a bargain.
- [25:51]
John Holmberg
It's half off. It's only $20.
- [25:53]
Brady
No, it's 40.
- [25:54]
John Holmberg
Oh, 40 after the discount.
- [25:55]
Brady
Yeah.
- [25:56]
John Holmberg
Everybody. In honor of George's passing and all he gave us, I mean, again, when we were kings. Watch that thing. Try not to be entertained. I dare you.
- [26:06]
Dick Toledo
Does somebody take over for the griller?
- [26:09]
John Holmberg
Yeah, George Foreman iii. He's got a whole bunch of them. There's five of them. Yeah. And then he's got Georgina and Georgette, his daughters. Not all of them. Not all the girls got George, but all the boys were named George. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
- [26:22]
Brett
Yeah, and one Georgetta.
- [26:24]
John Holmberg
Yeah, and a Georgetta. And I think he had a Georgina and then like a Vivian. And he had like normal names.
- [26:29]
Dick Toledo
But I saw his explanation last night. You get punched in the head a bunch of times. You name them all for simplicity.
- [26:35]
John Holmberg
He became funny and cute and he was a drunk, a mean drunk for like a while.
- [26:39]
Dick Toledo
Well, you're saying that cleaned his life. Rumble in the Jungle was. Was him exercising some demons.
- [26:44]
John Holmberg
He's, well, constantly exercising demons. The dude was a. It was just a.
- [26:50]
Brett
With Ali Boomaye.
- [26:52]
John Holmberg
They had to. This is a truth. And this is. This is what. When you're around boxing a lot, every gym has that. Go ahead and try to break this brand new heavy bag. They had to have extra heavy bags around for George Foreman because he could break a heavy bag the first day. I have the same heavy bag at my house that I've had for about 18 years. Showing a little wear and tear finally. Well, it took some time and sometimes it fights back because it's been hanging so long. The bottom end of it's heavier than the top and I'll throw like a low punch at it and my whole arm feels like it's gonna just blow up because the bag hurts. He broke those. He was just a skeleton crushing mammoth machine of man. And a sports hero. Like an American sports hero and then American figure. That was generationally like, it was ridiculous. So we lost a big one there Friday. That was big. And Anthony at the rah rah room turned to me. George Foreman's dead. Like, hey, you know, ease in. I need you throwing that out there. So there's that. I also, on the way to the Suns game, had a. A meth out nut bag, homeless guy come walk right up to me as I was waiting for my friend Marty Ona. He was walking towards me and I was outside waiting, told him where to meet. And I'm standing there waiting and this dude walks right up to me and tells me something about a lady named Sarah who is definitely looking for me and she's planning on killing me and she's going to eat all of my organs. And he was within an inch of me, me. And I was ready to go. I was ready to, in front of everybody, kill a man. It was very close. This was an intimidating moment. Just stepped away. I've never smelled anything as bad as this and I've never seen anything as bad as this zombie nation lives. This, this human being wasn't human. You know in like sci fi movies when the zombies come at you, that was it. I don't think I've ever been that face to face with a methed out loon, ever. It's horrifying. Horrifying. And he got a little close and I got my hands up and ready to, you know, another step and I'm gonna push off. I'm gonna get you away from me here. And I have to. It was. He was so. It was so gross. So gross. So I did not kill, but I'm this close to having been. I almost murdered someone. And it was in my brain to go, I'm gonna have to kill this person. But if the Sarah Lane good you held off coming from my organs. Oh my God. I've. I've never. He's walk a little film of him walking towards me and he's just. And then he sees me and I hear, what up brother? And I'm like, oh boy. And then he just stops. And as he started to kind of approach, I think he saw that I was like in a. I'm going to kick you in the chest posture. One more step and he would have caught one. And, and I'm telling you, man, the smell, everything else. I immediately went back and canceled all the water for the summer for these people. They don't need it. We need to get rid of them. I don't think I want to give anything to the homeless anymore. I think I'm done with it.
- [30:08]
Brett
You should have took them to the game.
- [30:09]
John Holmberg
It was like, yeah, down in the rah rah. It was life altering to sit back and go, I'm not helping these people anymore. The ones that are normal will find help. This guy, there's. He's gone. He gone. We don't have to worry about this cat anymore. I don't. I don't imagine ever him being in a room interviewing for a gig. This is going to go. This was going the wrong way. So I think, Brett, here's what we'll do this year for the. The summer water drive. We'll. We'll get it first. You won't have to go out. We'll get it all here first. And then you and I'll just drive around and pick and choose who we give it to.
- [30:43]
Brady
Hey, I like that idea.
- [30:45]
John Holmberg
Like, I don't. That guy's finished. I want to start kind of a bougie members only homeless guy club. You know, he gets the. I know. You know, you stand in there and just kind of assess you almost like a credit check for the homeless. It has to be at least one. And then, you know, just run a credit karma on you, ask a couple of questions. No bottle for you. Next I'd be the water Nazi. Yeah, yeah, just give me some damage on you. What's your history? I'm.
- [31:14]
Brett
How many accidents?
- [31:15]
John Holmberg
You come up to me with what he did, and I'm like, nah, help's long gone. I don't want to not be a humanitarian, but at a certain point, you just walk until the sun bakes you. Because I. I'm. That was. Nobody needs to deal with that. And I know there'll be people going, oh, where's your heart? I'm like, ah, no thanks. I give to the ones who want to help themselves. All we're doing with that is sustaining that nut bag for going up to anybody else telling them. And then, you know what? Why should I want to help somebody who knows a person who wants to cook and eat my organs?
- [31:48]
Brett
And why roll Sarah under the bus?
- [31:50]
John Holmberg
Who's this Sarah? And how adept is she at carving out my organs and eating them? Because that was the message. Kind of standing in front of Palomar Hotel just waiting, and this dude lost it. And, you know, it was worse. Like, none of the valet guys cared. I was just kind of like, that'll happen. Suns game. People just walking into this, keeping out of this day in life. Just basically what it was was dickhead roulette. And I won that day. He chose me and everybody else. Like, oh, thank God the bald guy's got to deal with it. And, you know, I kind of did. I'll help you. I want people to be okay. This whole blanket for everybody thing, I think maybe we need to reassess this. I'll call the Phoenix rescue mission this summer and say I had a couple of run ins. Can I run the velvet rope at your place for a little while? So you don't want to help everybody? No, I don't. I have to be honest with you. I think you're doing Great work down here, but I think you're pick and choose and let a few of these fall off. But people will die.
- [33:00]
Brett
Yeah, it happens.
- [33:02]
John Holmberg
Everybody. You know, George Foreman's gone.
- [33:04]
Brett
The Phoenix Rescue Mission, Studio 54.
- [33:07]
John Holmberg
Yeah, I like that in the club. And there's a downstairs for, like, really good water. Like Pana. That's where you tell them you're sparkling or still. Oh, well, it's almost paid to be homeless. I want people who want to help themselves and then just kind of a grand statement to just say, okay, water for all of them. Not that one. And not that lady who touched my car a couple of weeks ago, walked up and just put that sign up against the window. She gets no water for her either. Brad, let's go. Let's be judgy philanthropists.
- [33:44]
Brett
How about that?
- [33:45]
John Holmberg
That's never been a thing. I'm not gonna include Brady on this because he caved, but Bretton John's judgy philanthropy, we drive around and a car filled with prizes for the homeless, and we assess him like, how you doing? And he goes, hey, man, I'm just trying to make ends meet and relate water. Here's some stuff. You go crazy. And then the next guy's like, I got leeches all over my body. Well, you're gonna die in the sun. Brett and John's judgy philanthropy is a very real thing.
- [34:13]
Brady
Oh, I look forward to Thursday mornings now.
- [34:15]
John Holmberg
It's almost like doge. We're going to go to the ones who are wasting it. We're gonna doge the homeless. Us. I want to help, but I want to help people that can be helped. There's a certain part where you're just too far gone and also have a plane for them.
- [34:33]
Brett
Get on the plane.
- [34:34]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Move them to a country where that stuff's good. Homeless Landia or unhomelandia. Look, I feel bad for what's going on in your life, but we've hit a level here where there's no turning back. So you know what we're gonna do, Brad, with our judgy philanthropy?
- [34:51]
Brady
What's up?
- [34:51]
John Holmberg
We'll have bags of fentanyl as well, and I'll go. You choose Fentanyl. Delicious water.
- [34:59]
Brady
Was this the Matrix now?
- [35:00]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Yeah. Basically, it'll be Morpheus in my left hand.
- [35:03]
Brett
You're gonna be left with a lot of water.
- [35:05]
John Holmberg
That's right. And you know what? It'll go to the right people, and then the. And the news will begrudgingly say, the Brett and John judgey philanthropy has solved homelessness Everybody got water that deserved water. And all the meth heads got there. That's a good idea. We got all this. I got cop friends. We got all this. Seized fentanyl. Let's go out with bags of it and say, you choose what's in the right hand, and I will open the hole. I'll take the fentanyl. All right. See you later. Bye.
- [35:41]
Brett
Now, let's make a deal beyond. Yeah, Door number one.
- [35:45]
John Holmberg
Yeah, you can fish. Well, one has fentanyl. No, I want them to know the choices. I don't want them to get water and then waste it. And then I. I don't want them to think that when they didn't choose, like, let's see what you missed behind door number two. Oh, bags and bags of fentanyl. And they're like, oh, I got water. Like, okay, never mind.
- [36:05]
Brady
We're supposed to do with this.
- [36:06]
John Holmberg
Judgy philanthropy is a good idea. We're here to help, but only if you want it.
- [36:14]
Brady
Luke from my account will be happy. It's a lot easier picking up some fentanyl than it is those cases of water.
- [36:18]
John Holmberg
He's gonna be thrilled.
- [36:19]
Brady
The harder is get.
- [36:20]
John Holmberg
It's so easy to get all that water. It's just a tough load. Yeah, that's a great idea, Brett. We're gonna do that. Brett will be on top of the car with a bullhorn like he's running for something in the 1950s. Turn to me. I'm Brett Besley with chatty philanthropy. Who wants fentanyl and who wants water? Fentanyl to the land, water to the right. Okay, you spinning in the center. You're getting nothing today. Yeah, that's it. Judgy philanthropy. I think that's a great idea.
- [36:45]
Brady
I like that.
- [36:48]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Cause all these people going out, giving all this hard earned money and stuff, donating to our causes, and then we hand it over to that dude. Wouldn't that be ironic if that guy's only alive because he was Got just enough water a couple of times through our water drive to save him. And then he and Sarah come and cook my organs. Oh, the circle of death. In a bitter twist of irony, it's kind of like saving Private Ryan. The guy that you should have killed comes back and gets you.
- [37:16]
Brett
Tough scene.
- [37:17]
John Holmberg
I got fentanyl. I got crack. I got water. Which one do you want? Oh, man. Well, the water's out. You know which one I want. It's like playing Mary F. Kill with Lizzo. You know, you want her dead. Fentanyl or meth? And wait. And also water. Yeah, I heard you. I heard you. You. Fentanyl, meth, and the other thing. Water. Nope. Yep, I know. I'm familiar with it. You know, I just get water out of puddles. Like, that's true. It's hard to get a free bag of fentanyl. I think I'm gonna go with fentanyl. All right.
- [37:52]
Brett
See you later.
- [37:54]
John Holmberg
And in the end, we're just trying to make people happy and he's happy.
- [37:59]
Brady
That's what we do.
- [38:00]
John Holmberg
That's right. Next thing you know, Brett and I are in Trump's office with Elon Musk. How did you guys solve the homeless problem in Phoenix? I think you're gonna like this. We gave him fentanyl. Oh, brilliant. Just get rid of them. Just kept. They had to go.
- [38:16]
Brady
You're hired.
- [38:17]
John Holmberg
They had to go. The worst of the worst. Let's get a wake up song and find out what today holds for us. 585-9800. A good one. We'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up Arizona. It's out of control now. Morning sickness. Morning sickness. Thank you. Miles to nowhere, Katie and the Hobbs getting her done for another day. As we get to the the quarter poll. Coming up here for 2025 as we roll into April. Shortly after yesterday was my mom's birthday. So happy birthday to Marcy.
- [38:58]
Brady
Family dinner.
- [38:59]
John Holmberg
Huh?
- [38:59]
Brady
Family dinner.
- [39:00]
John Holmberg
Oh, no, no, no, no. She had a family dinner without me.
- [39:03]
Brady
Oh, okay. All right.
- [39:04]
John Holmberg
Took that true sister of mine and they went somewhere. I'll. But we're going to have some. There was some sort of agreement arrangement, but that was already in place. I'll wait it out. Yeah. So mom's. Mom's had her birthday yesterday. It was great. So we'll take mom out later. Happy birthday, Marcy. I say she is a beloved mother of one wonderful child and my sister. I can't imagine watching it eat. Never mind. It's a long story. So. Yeah. So mom had her birthday yesterday. And it always puts me in that mindset of spring. Like when my mom's birthday rolled around. Always growing up, I knew we're a day or two away from baseball for real. And I still have that, like, you know, yesterday and over the weekend, I'm like, oh, boy, this is good excitement of opening day. Yeah, Very good. And I have to thank also because I drove all the way out to Josh's Action ride shop up there on. On Power and McDowell.
- [40:03]
Brady
You did?
- [40:04]
John Holmberg
I did. Because he had my bike. And when I'm out There. It's a trap. I realized this. This is a trap. So I text or I told Josh will be out there. Gonna pick up my bike and say, you know, do think. Get my bike, load it up and get a text from Doug Hopkins. What are you doing? I'm like, how did you know? Where are you? Like, I'm on Power and McDowell. That's it. We're drinking. And I'm like, oh, no.
- [40:26]
Brett
Saturday.
- [40:26]
Brady
Got an airtag in your Jeep or something, man?
- [40:28]
Brett
Yeah, he does. He's got that phone up.
- [40:32]
John Holmberg
We ended up at Lucky Lose watching some basketball over the weekend, which is another thing that's got. You got. This is a great time. March Madness. The weather's amazing. And then you got. All the bars are packed full in the daytime and it's fun. I don't care who's winning, by the way. You can sit and slave all day over your bracket. I had AI do mine. I'm right in the hunt, baby. I got like, AI smart. AI looks at the reason that they're one or two seats is more than likely you're going to end up. So right now I have. I have one spot that misses the next round. Everything else is green. So I'm going into the Final Four that all those things that these players gut. I have a gut that you see Santa Barbara is going to roll oil. No, no. But you don't know anything about this. And then when you get it and you hit it, you think you've done something right. You don't even know any of the players. Be smart, play the odds in your favor and start going. One I've missed has kept me from being at the top spot.
- [41:31]
Brett
Usually it's one out of the four top seeds.
- [41:34]
John Holmberg
There'll be one surprise. But right now it's looking like it's going to be three ones and a three there. No upsets mattered going into that. You just get the Final Four right. So it's pretty great being kind of. And I don't even know who I picked. I know I've got Auburn winning at all, but I just look for the green check marks on the computer. It's great. It's the best. It's the best March Madness has ever been. So I don't know if you guys remember last week when I told you about the lawyer feminist and her farting husband? Yes. They had their 16th wedding anniversary Friday night. And I saw them again and we started to chat. And I think I'm a lawyer now because we had a WNBA conversation Wednesday last week where I feel like I did pretty well defending myself. And she actually admitted at the end, she goes, you know what? You've redeemed yourself. I always thought it was just an argument to hate women. And I'm like, no, not at all. That's the problem. I have the league. You can't say anything bad about it. Makes people thing. So then made fun of her husband, who farts all the time, named Scott, and her name is Chelsea. And so ran into him again on Friday. Wonderful. Had her 16th anniversary. They brought friends over. They've all listened to the whole podcast. Last week when I was talking about Scott's what he called a medical issue, but doesn't have a name, which just means he just farts on her.
- [42:50]
Brett
That's what it's called.
- [42:51]
John Holmberg
So she comes up to me Saturday and says, 16 years of being farted on tonight. And I'm like, oh, it's the 16th anniversary. The first time the guy gassed out on you? And she goes, no, no, we got married. I'm like, oh, so it's been longer than 16 years? You just locked it down 16 years ago to guarantee farting as much as possible in your life. Started laughing. Introduced me to her feminist friend. This is another friend of mine. She's a feminist as well. And I said, oh, great. Now two yapping broads and the feminists laugh. So I think, you know what? The key to making feminists less AOC and more fun, it's just hit them headlong with some misogyny. They seem to love it.
- [43:31]
Brady
So I live my life.
- [43:32]
John Holmberg
That's how I live my own. Great. I got two yapping broads mad at me. You're such a dick. I'm like, yeah, well, you can say it, and I can't. But we had another great conversation about. She started in with the WNBA again, and she goes, I was thinking about something. And she had been talking that she was in court all day, and she'd. And adjudicating and doing lawyer stuff, and her husband's standing right there. And I like him a lot.
- [43:55]
Brett
Charging hours.
- [43:56]
John Holmberg
I like this dude. Scott is a good. They're very sweet people. I actually really like them both. But he said, we're talking about something. She said, I was thinking about something. She goes, your argument towards it being the WNBA is just a bad product. And she goes, what about men's college basketball? What do you think of that? And I'm like, I love the gambling aspect of it. And then so she starts to kind of form this argument against, like, well, what's the difference. But I think the college basketball product is absolute garbage. And I don't want to watch people, people's kids do anything for free. I don't want to watch high school basketball. It's a bunch of people's kids. I don't go to, like, you know, little league basketball. Why would I do that? That's college is the accelerated version of, of club ball. And I'm like, it's neat. If you've got a team, fine. But I'm like, the product is garbage. It's. It's a lot of slopping and flopping and messing around. Around. And then she looked at me and she goes, I didn't expect you to say that. Like what? She goes, you just took the wind out of my sails. And I'm like, I rest my case. Do I get a degree for this? I've argued a lawyer down twice.
- [44:57]
Brett
It'll be interesting. I think it's next year on the college basketball.
- [45:02]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [45:02]
Brett
High level. They'll. They'll get into the center of the profit sharing of the tv, right?
- [45:06]
John Holmberg
Oh, sure.
- [45:07]
Brett
Oh, look, they're saying, you know, like football players, like in the bigger schools, you make the roster. You're making 200,000.
- [45:16]
John Holmberg
Well, I don't think basketball. The big ones do.
- [45:18]
Brett
They're saying like 400.
- [45:20]
John Holmberg
Well, it depends. It depends.
- [45:21]
Brett
There's not as many guys on.
- [45:22]
John Holmberg
Right. But I don't think everybody's going to make 400 grand. No. Yeah, they're not going to pay them that way. But it'll be a thing where big schools up to guys can give from the school beyond the nil stuff they can, and they're just going to pay up front. It's crazy. And I'm fine with that. Just call it what it is. It's farm league basketball. I'm cool. Just call it what it is. Stop pretending college is some sanctimonious, unbelievable. You know, they do it for the love of the game. No, they don't. They do it for the money. And they've been using slave labor for years, making a killing. I've been to Ohio State. I watched the Michigan Ohio State game firsthand. Once you remove yourself from the passion and emotions of being a fan of either team, you look around and go, this is a crime.
- [46:12]
Brett
Holy revenue.
- [46:13]
John Holmberg
The money that's being spent across the city. That one blew me away more than anything I've ever been around. Free labor. And I go into any drugstore, the bank, everybody's selling or wearing sold Ohio State gear, and it's the same in Ann Arbor. Both of those schools have sold a shirt to everyone that's at that game, plus everyone in that city. City. You're looking at a million. Just one. If you just did one. A million t shirts at 30 bucks a pop covers the nut. Now we got ticket sales, beers, food. I can't imagine the money, the TV revenue. And these guys were doing it and saying, you know, we can't pay these players. It would ruin the, the authenticity of the game. Like, you guys are thieves. So, yeah, so the fact that the players are starting to squeak out some cash to me is, it's almost insulting. We'll give you $200,000. Only the best players will get. It's like, are you kidding me? You guys could be paying just like the NFL. The big schools, they could be giving 20, 30 million dollar deals to some players and they will eventually when they turn it into an actual business.
- [47:24]
Brett
But that tournament, the reason why on the basketball side, yeah, it's just, it's a one and done. And so that whole, the weekend and the, you know, know you're seeing 64 teams or 68, whatever you're seeing.
- [47:37]
John Holmberg
CBS makes a billion dollars every March for two weeks of work.
- [47:41]
Brett
Yeah.
- [47:42]
John Holmberg
And they're trying to say it's all for the education of the kids.
- [47:45]
Brett
And once it gets down to the Final Four, it's kind of strung out a little bit because they gotta.
- [47:50]
John Holmberg
I'd venture to guess if every one of those kids graduated from communications or basket weaving or whatever their farce degree is. You're not even gonna get $6 billion worth of revenue out of every, every, every class, out of everyone who plays in a tournament. You're not going to see eventually $6 billion come to the market through them. It's not going to happen. You'll very rarely get a Matt ish, be a pop out of the, the final four, but you'll get $6 billion. It's a, it's a ridiculous amount of money for this. And I love that. I think that's great. But when they keep trying to make it about, you know, the love of college and it's like, oh my God, does nobody see this? This, this? It's just a pile of horse crap, you know, disguised as, you know, some beautiful thing where they're giving kids a chance that otherwise wouldn't. Are you kidding me? Cooper flag just turned 18 in December. He should be in high school. He wasn't going to have a problem without college going right into the NBA if it didn't exist. They'd take him right now. But he needs an education. Like, stop it, stop it. Why does he need an education but other people have to pay for it? That's the bigger thing.
- [49:02]
Brett
Because it's the revenue.
- [49:03]
John Holmberg
If it's all about the education, shouldn't he just give that away? No, no, no, no. Only the kids who need the education get free education. If they play ball for us, the ones who need it the least that already have a massive skill get free everything. It's weird. The kids who don't, you know, they have to go through grants and all this and beg Joe Biden for payments and get their money back. It's slave labor and it always has. This guy says the same thing, 110%. John. I've said for years, college is slave labor. Kids make nothing. Coaches make millions. The school is reliant on it. It's crazy, but it is fun, man. And the gambling, I can't even imagine what gambling spun around for that. Even in just like office pools and things. Like it's a massive.
- [49:53]
Brett
If TVs doing six bill.
- [49:56]
John Holmberg
If it's two and a half weeks of, of just. I mean, that's nothing. Yeah, it's. It's beyond super bowl numbers. It's crazy. So I'm all for it. That's capitalism. Tip to cap. Yeah. She argued with me about like, what about that? It's just. It's not a great product. It is, isn't. If it was, we'd watch all year.
- [50:15]
Brett
We don't you hear a lot of people. I did over the weekend. It's like, gosh, get rid of the three point line.
- [50:22]
John Holmberg
It's ruining.
- [50:23]
Brady
That's all they do now.
- [50:24]
John Holmberg
It's ruining the game pro end. Otherwise it's just wrecked it. But bottom line, again, it's kind of like tamales. At a certain time of year we all pay attention to it, but otherwise we don't want much to do with college basketball. There's not a whole lot of excitement going on. Somehow or another Grand Canyon figured it out because they'll fill that arena by saying you get extra credit for going to the game. So the students all load up. Smart.
- [50:46]
Brady
Is that true?
- [50:47]
John Holmberg
Yeah. They get a little extra credit. No kidding.
- [50:49]
Brett
At Kirby School as well.
- [50:51]
John Holmberg
If you attend, if you attend some of the games.
- [50:54]
Brady
I've been at every game in high school. Are you kidding me?
- [50:56]
John Holmberg
Oh yeah. The Christian schools figured that out by. They basically say if you don't go to the game, God thinks you're a dick. And then they show up to stuff and they give them a little extra credit, it works out nicely. But I, I kind of giggle at the whole thing, but yeah. So I won another argument with a lawyer and I felt great about it. And then now you need to give.
- [51:15]
Brett
Her an INV voice for a couple hundred bucks charge.
- [51:17]
John Holmberg
Yeah, I should for my time. A couple hours in. That's true.
- [51:20]
Brett
Because she's coming to you.
- [51:22]
John Holmberg
Great point. She's arguing to me. I was just minding my own. You're right. I'm billing her.
- [51:28]
Brett
Clock's running.
- [51:28]
John Holmberg
I'm billing her. If I see her again tonight, I'm billing her. Hey look, you keep wanting to fight me in the courtroom and I keep winning these things. I think you owe me some fees. I'll call Kevin Rotterdam, see what that should run. I got, I think that's pretty good stuff.
- [51:43]
Brett
Get that letterhead.
- [51:44]
John Holmberg
Oh, then Friday night I'm chatting with some of the staff there at the Rah Rah room and a couple weeks ago one of the girls, you know, wanted to go home to see her dog. It had been in a kennel. And I overheard it and I'm like, I can't hear this. So I told the manager, bryce, I'm like, you need to cut this one. She's got to go home. Her dog's been in a kennel for six hours. I can't live knowing that. I said, I'll drive out there, take care of your dog for you. And she lives too far away. It's not going to happen. So the dog's going to stay in the kennel. I got a little bit of a hypocrite. If it's too far away, the dog will be fine. If it was pretty close, I'd have done it. So I said to her on Friday, I said, how's the dog? She goes, I'm running late again tonight. He's in the kennel. And she goes, but I've got, I got a plan. And this was probably 10:30, maybe 11:00. She goes, I just found a guy online is willing to walk him. And I'm like a rando. She's like 45 year old guy. And I'm like, and how does he get into your house? Well, I just give him the code. I'm like, congratulations, enjoy your rape. This is the only thing that's gonna happen. Wow. I'm like, wait a second. And she's in my room and her roommate works there too. The two of them work together. And I'm like, well this is a. No self respecting man is on Rover at 11 o'clock waiting to walk your dog. He wants to. He's gonna rape you.
- [53:02]
Brady
He just wants co. She must be a smoke show.
- [53:07]
John Holmberg
Well, everybody works. There's good looking, but it's just this. All right, well. And then I had to be the voice of reason. I'm like, you do realize what you're doing?
- [53:15]
Brett
What?
- [53:15]
John Holmberg
He's just. He's on Rover. I've used him before. Not at 11, you don't. I need a late night dog walker slash rapist. Here's my house coats. And I just watched her eyes get big like, oh my God. You might be right. Right. You think that guy's not in there going through, you know, young blondes underwear drawer?
- [53:37]
Brett
He is.
- [53:37]
John Holmberg
There's no question. He's been sitting by the phone at 11 waiting to walk dogs.
- [53:42]
Brett
Yeah, I'll walk the dog.
- [53:44]
John Holmberg
You don't say. I think Rover's a great service. It closes at 9. No more overnight dog walking. Unless you pre arranged that before. And certainly I want to shake the hands of the person. And walking my dog. I'm not just going to get on there and go, who's out there? Let's spin this wheel. Oh, I gave her so much crap.
- [54:02]
Brett
I found him on Creeper.
- [54:05]
John Holmberg
There's this thing called rapey or you rape. And I just give him my codes. He goes in, he takes my dog for a walk and waits for me in the bushes like, you can't do this. And then I started. Marty and I were there. I'm like, what's your. What's your address? And then Marty's like, my daughter will do it. I'm like, see, now you know the guy and you can. Yeah, well, there's pictures of him on the website. Yeah, there's pictures of plenty of predators on every side. And that's easy.
- [54:30]
Brady
Jeffrey Dahmer had pictures, you know, I.
- [54:32]
John Holmberg
Mean, hey, John Wayne Gacy put up children's party flyers. They were pictures of him everywhere. Oh, I get nervous for the youth. I get nervous for the youth.
- [54:42]
Brett
Can't be done.
- [54:44]
John Holmberg
And they're laughing and I'm like, I'm not. This isn't funny. If you're gonna. There's a dude with a leash in a bush with codes that knows codes don't change codes. I'm fine. Like, all right. And then a roommate comes over to me later and goes, I don't like it either. Like, well, no, because it's. I wouldn't give Brett the code to my house. Well, I'll get it later. Josh wanted to Pick up my bike. He goes, just give me the code to the garage. And I'm like, I'll just pop it open from here. Don't worry about it. I'll figure it out. And I love Josh and I know I can trust him, but he doesn't need to be knowing my codes. What if Josh and I have a falling out and Josh hands out my codes?
- [55:19]
Brady
I want to know people's codes.
- [55:20]
John Holmberg
I don't want to know either.
- [55:22]
Brady
That's no.
- [55:23]
John Holmberg
And there's another reason why mine's on.
- [55:24]
Brett
Just on the front door.
- [55:25]
John Holmberg
1, 2, 3, 4. Yeah, if you can spell new friend, that's Brady's code. Password, password and new friend. Those are the things that get him into everything. Hey look Ronnie, we've got a new friend in our bank account and he seems to need the money more than us. Yeah, I got a lot of bikes in that garage of mine. I can't do that stuff. So that's crazy. But yeah. I didn't know that was a service rover. I'm telling you, I love what you guys do, especially in big city stuff like New York and Chicago and people are running around, their dogs are in apartments all day or you know, in this situation where people are working all day and they get home a little late and you know, but set that up. You're closed at 9, you can't have some. And I even said no self respecting 45 year old guy is making ends meet by walking dogs randomly. Anybody says to you after 10:00 at night, well this is what my grandpa would say. Nothing good happens after 10. What's your, what's your house code? So I could pop in there after 10 o'clock. You just don't hand that out anymore to anyone ever. You do a little silk sonic, he's just going to be sitting in there with your panties on his head. Dog and I went around the block four times. I'm staying the night. And then. And there's the other thing. KE says this. And this is what I brought up. The dog now knows him. So you introduce your.
- [56:56]
Brett
They're friends.
- [56:57]
John Holmberg
Never thought of that. You just made the rapist friends with your last line of defense. Oh, oh. I'm going to go buy four schle and bring them to those girls tonight when I go into that room. Here, ladies, I bought you some locks. Now go get these on there, change your codes back and stop letting that rapist in there at 11 o'clock. You got nothing to do on a Friday. Want to walk my dogs? Just walking Around a neighborhood. Whose are those? I don't know. What's his name? I don't know. I got him out of that young girl's house over there. Oh, my Lord, make it stop. The world's gone crazy. Here's another thing I want stopped. Enough news. I'm going to talk to Troy Hayden. I'm going to the game with him tonight. I'm going to Talk to Channel 12's Troy Hayden today. I have seen and know that there is no interest left at all in the news stories about. About library books that haven't been returned for like 100 years. Nobody cares. Another one. Oh, for Christ's sake, Enough already.
- [58:03]
Brett
And they're not going to hold them to the fine.
- [58:05]
John Holmberg
Oh, the fine. It's like a nickel. Even after a hundred years, they bought the new book. If nobody missed the book for 80 years, it wasn't that good of a book. You could have just. You know what I think libraries did. They go. Nobody brought back that dumb book. Book. Let's go. And they'd go to the other library and check it out and put it in theirs and no one would know any different. A University of British Columbia graduate mailed a package. And they're bringing them back. It makes it seem like they're doing something. Susan Parker, librarian at the university, said a package arrived in January and she opened it to discover a 1931 edition of Horace Kephart's book Camping and Handbook for Vacation Campers and for Travelers in the Wilderness. You should just give that away. The book had been checked out in 1960 by a student named Robert Murray. I've never received a book this old before. It's so long overdue. Enough libraries. You're on your last legs. You think radio's in trouble. Libraries, please.
- [59:05]
Brett
So this is how we whittle a wolf.
- [59:07]
John Holmberg
I didn't know libraries even cared about books anymore. I always thought it was the place for homeless guys to masturbate on the Internet. Internet. I was concerned that I just have you. When's the last time you were in a library? It's been ages.
- [59:21]
Brady
30 years ago, maybe.
- [59:22]
John Holmberg
At least. There's no reason. Yeah. And I now I just picture it as like some sort of a. Like a sperm palace. Like they just have plastic around every computer because you can go in there if you don't have the Internet and use a computer. So it's for poor people to use pornhub. And then they have code a few.
- [59:39]
Brett
Times with Kirby, you know, to like a probably nine.
- [59:42]
John Holmberg
Big public library. Yeah.
- [59:43]
Brett
The Greenfield what more? Got the Internet, a couple of children's books.
- [59:49]
John Holmberg
I got them on the Internet.
- [59:51]
Brady
They got Amazon. Just buy it.
- [59:52]
John Holmberg
Kindle.
- [59:53]
Brady
Or even have the real one sent to you.
- [59:55]
John Holmberg
Yeah. So. And you. And you haven't gone back because you're like, this is a waste of time.
- [59:58]
Brett
Yeah, maybe. And then one time to vote.
- [60:02]
John Holmberg
Oh, they send you to the library.
- [60:03]
Brett
Library?
- [60:04]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [60:06]
Brady
The Dobson Ranch one a couple months ago. Or a couple. Like a year or two ago.
- [60:10]
John Holmberg
Still cooking?
- [60:10]
Brady
Oh, yeah, yeah. Just remodeled. A big old facelift. And I'm like, for who?
- [60:13]
John Holmberg
Doge those things.
- [60:17]
Brett
They have most of them.
- [60:18]
John Holmberg
Doge all the libraries. That's a new thing. Or just when all those homeless guys are in there masturbating, lock it down and keep them in there. Library. You got to be the cheapest person on the planet.
- [60:34]
Brett
Ever been to the big copper building one downtown?
- [60:37]
John Holmberg
Downtown, yeah. Because it's just loaded with dudes jerking off.
- [60:40]
Brett
I gotta get down there.
- [60:41]
John Holmberg
You should. You should give it a try. That guy that tried to attack me. But enough of that. It's not a fun story. It's not a cute story. It's like the library book was over 70 years. Nobody cared for 70 years. And I'm supposed to now. We didn't even know it was missing.
- [60:57]
Brady
Yeah, it's the only way to get a news. That and homeless people jerking off in there. Otherwise, nobody remembers. Cover.
- [61:03]
John Holmberg
The other thing that libraries do, which is just clean up homeless sperms. Another man slips and falls in the library. Clean up homeless sperm. Paralyzed by the way. A book was over. I probably have a couple library books I didn't return. Somewhere in a box in my house. If they didn't come after you. Not a thing. But there it was. And it seems like it's every couple days another one. Somebody had it in their house for over 80 years. Library wasn't then. The library's a waste of time. They didn't even look for it. It's like if Blockbuster came back and said you still have one of them Kevin Costner movies that you checked out a long time ago. You give it back to where the Blockbuster was and it's some Mexican restaurant. Thanks. Whoa. We'll put it on the nose. No Way Out. A guy returned no Way out to where we used to be. Blockbuster, like 30 years ago. Nobody wants that. It's dumb. No Way Out's a good movie, but interesting. Internet. Stream it.
- [62:06]
Brady
Bull Durham.
- [62:08]
John Holmberg
What do you give me this for? El Toro Durham. No, no, I'm returning it. You used to be a Blockbuster and I just found this moving and I want attention. Oh, I see. Will you call the news, Javier, Just so you can. We'll stand on the news together and you can show that I returned.
- [62:24]
Brady
It would be interviewing you after that.
- [62:27]
John Holmberg
Yeah, right. Why did you bother Javier with bulldorm? He does not care here. Well, I had it since 1998. I thought it would be funny. H's morning sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible. Hberg's morning sickness.
- [62:49]
Brett
It gives something. I mean, if it was a came in with a jar and it had, you know, parchment on there and they rolled out. I had this at my house for a thousand years.
- [63:01]
John Holmberg
That'd be a great story. Sure, if you have a thousand year old parchment and you bring it back to the Mexican restaurant where the cave once stood. You want to impress me? Bring your library book back and pay the fine. Break it in. What do I open?
- [63:18]
Brady
That never happens.
- [63:19]
John Holmberg
Nope. They're always. They want the news to come out and go, that's crazy. So stupid. Yeah, that and the other thing I saw in the news where they had another show on some dumb channel where they had some girl who won the lottery and then she wanted to be a cautionary tale of how it ruined her life. Give me that chance. It's not. They always do that for people. It's a life ruining event. She won like $5 million.
- [63:45]
Brett
It's a curse.
- [63:46]
John Holmberg
It's a curse. Like you're the curse, dummy. You did this. They give you all that money and then they expect you to be responsible. And I wasn't stupid. Lottery. It's like, why is that the lottery's fault? Can't believe the lottery gave me all that money when I played game and then didn't hold my hand through how not to spend it all in the first couple of weeks. And it all starts the same with some big voice guy going, so they.
- [64:11]
Brett
Told you to put all the cash in the trunk of the car.
- [64:15]
John Holmberg
I bought Chanel and Dior and I was just going crazy. And you know, it doesn't last forever. She bought. I think she bought like 150 purses. Her joke was, I have all this money, I gotta put it somewhere. So she bought a ton of like five $6,000 purses. And I'm like, oh, that's dumb. And then so she gets to a point where she realized she doesn't have much, sells them back half, not doing the same price. And then she became a fashion merchandiser. I don't know if she's selling a bunch of garbage that she's buying. She's not getting any money for it, so she's buying stuff for more. Didn't care that it was more than what she was selling it for. And the next thing you know, she's down to nothing. And then she calls the news and says, the lottery ruined my life. No, it didn't. No one who gives you $5 million has ruined your life. That's just. I don't care how it. A drug dealer gives you $500 and you'll go, drug dealers ruined my life. You're like, thank you, I'll do my best. Five years after you say, boy, did I ruin my life. That guy gave me $5 million and.
- [65:21]
Brett
I went down and I bought beanie beans.
- [65:23]
John Holmberg
I bought loads of dumb stuff and I purchased the swizzle in and I did terribly stupid things and now I'm broke. Stupid lottery. She says now she's never going to do that again. Enough for me as a model, of course, and a fashion merchandiser now I said, I'll just make just enough to make ends meet and follow my passions for the rest of my life. I've never once been behind a guy who scratched a scratcher and won 500 bucks and went, ah, crap, there goes my weekend. It's pretty awesome to win money for free or for a buck. I gave this guy a dollar, he gave me a ticket with a bunch of silver poison on it. I scratched that off and I left with 500. What a scam. I wrecked my day after that. I spent it all on alcohol and hookers. It ruined my week. You know what never happens either? You never have that happen when radio station gives away a bunch of money. We gave away $10,000 together. You never called back and went, thanks a lot, dicks. What? Well, I spent all that dumb money. Now I'm back to zero again. Way to go, radio. Radio contest wrecked my Life. I won 10 grand. I went out and I bought a car I can't afford. Stupid radio people are dumb. The one guy won like $12 million and within a year gone. Well, he gave it to friends. All his friends were doing great. By the way, lottery didn't ruin their life. He had two friends that are still like, we're good, we're helping them out. But you know, I can't give it all back. That's dumb. I gave her to a couple co workers and a family member. Where's your teeth? Damn lottery. Lottery made my teeth fall off.
- [67:19]
Brett
Out went on with David, bought my dream home.
- [67:23]
John Holmberg
Oh, that dude. Those people never seem to have a problem. The I wanted your win. Well, David and Godamn. I've never met a more homosexual man than I'm looking at right now.
- [67:36]
Brett
I kind of like him.
- [67:37]
John Holmberg
On the lottery Dream home super show. I won $5 million. Oh my God. We're going to have so much fun shopping. I had a feeling you were gonna say that eventually. Do you want a Buffalo ranch? Of course I want a Buffalo Ranch. Let's go get it.
- [67:55]
Brett
You're the same like every now and then. If I check that out, it's like they won a million dollar scratcher. Skip.
- [68:03]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Oh, I don't watch them unless they win a lot of money.
- [68:04]
Brett
We want to spend 300,000.
- [68:06]
John Holmberg
One of the saddest ones is David the gay. The tattooed gay. We drove around Savannah all day looking for houses for $175,000.
- [68:16]
Brady
Like, oh, he does the lo houses too.
- [68:18]
John Holmberg
And here's the other thing.
- [68:19]
Brady
I thought it was just big guys.
- [68:20]
John Holmberg
It's not even lottery anymore. Sometimes it's just settlements.
- [68:25]
Brett
Oh, I didn't.
- [68:25]
John Holmberg
Oh yeah. Sometimes like tell me what you've got. And they sit at some cafe and this.
- [68:31]
Brett
He's always hungry.
- [68:32]
John Holmberg
He'll be. My aunt died and then turned out she had some tax money coming her way and ended up giving it to me. How much? 135,000. Free and clear. Uh huh. What are you looking at? One bedroom. Something that's got a roof. We're all over it.
- [68:49]
Brett
This one's cute.
- [68:50]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Oh my God. I could totally see you having a cup of gruel or whatever it is you eat in the kitchen. And some grits. Grits and probably ramen in a styrofoam cup. Are you gonna. Are you gonna take your shirt off or something? Button's getting lower and lower. So hot in this tiny little non air conditioned home in Savannah. All right, David, by the way, David and I think you might take me up on this. After I buy this house, I'm gonna be looking for ways to pay for the air conditioner. So I'll blow your insanely gay ass for some money on the side. I'm gonna spend a lot of time at Savannah. That doesn't. I never watch that. If it's. If they want an annuity. I'm like, okay, this one's gonna suck. I do like one where they're seeing people at the lottery office with the big check and David from HGTV and he's got like 20 new tattoos. 12 or $13 million. David's in heaven. I've watched A few of them where I'm like, oh, just stay in the house you're in now. Like, some of them, like, what are you doing? One guy bought one for his daughter.
- [70:02]
Brett
And the other lady bought a house for her. Two adult. All three of them still living in.
- [70:07]
John Holmberg
The house he's gotten. Right. So why am I here, though, sir? Gay.
- [70:11]
Dick Toledo
So, yeah, I won the lottery for $10 million.
- [70:16]
John Holmberg
Oh, my God. Hold on. Why pick up my jaw? That's amazing. It's a lot. Oh, my gosh. What are we looking for? We're looking for a house for you and your daughter.
- [70:25]
Dick Toledo
For me and my daughter? Yeah.
- [70:26]
John Holmberg
I'd like to have that daughter. Seems like an accident.
- [70:29]
Dick Toledo
It gets hot here in the summertime.
- [70:30]
John Holmberg
It's hot here now.
- [70:31]
Dick Toledo
So, you know.
- [70:32]
John Holmberg
But David's wearing nothing.
- [70:34]
Dick Toledo
There'll be a miss in the picture and, you know, so grow into maybe a 5, 4, 4, 3.
- [70:42]
John Holmberg
Did he just say he's looking for a lady? I don't see it.
- [70:47]
Brett
Yeah, 10 mil.
- [70:49]
John Holmberg
No, that was 850,000. Well, it depends on where he's living, too. A lot of times the houses are cheaper. I love when David rolls in in a tank top and a pair of boy shorts. We drove all over Savannah trying to find the house of his dream. I just love Savannah. Oh, he's in Visalia. Hey, you can get a house there for dirt. It's crazy, but I don't want to see those stories anymore. I don't care about that. Look at nice clothes. Look at this.
- [71:23]
Dick Toledo
Like it?
- [71:24]
John Holmberg
I like the curb appeal. Great. Want to hear all about it? Yes, I do. All right. Lupin lane. It's got five bedrooms and four bathrooms. Plenty of space, over 3200 square feet. Feet. And the price is really good. 769. Awesome. Don't you get it? Let's go inside. It's so hot. This will take up another layer. Anyway, my dream, my lottery dream home. It'll catch my eye every once in a while. You win 10 million bucks. I'm gonna watch. But you drop down a 10 million dollar win and you only buy a $769,000 house. I'm out. I've been in a house that's $769,000. They're nice. I want to see a house. It's like 10 million bucks. Spend it all.
- [72:12]
Brett
It's showing the previews, you know, in the.
- [72:15]
John Holmberg
Oh, in the opener.
- [72:17]
Brett
A lot of buffalo ranches.
- [72:18]
John Holmberg
Tons of buffalo ranches. You scratched a ticket and it's changed your life. And they show like Liberace house. And now let's meet Jethro and his daughter, trill. We want 75k in some sort of weird VFW drawing. Okay, what do you want to do? Just buy a tent or something? Worried it's your an amazing tent. Is Trill gonna live with you? Hey, I'm gonna keep Trill around. She's got a lot of medical issues, so sometimes I have to give her CPR in her sleep.
- [72:50]
Brett
My lottery yurt.
- [72:52]
John Holmberg
Ooh, this one's got a zippy door. Zippy doors are hot. They remind me of pants. Wouldn't it be great if you unzipped a tent and a big giant tent dick came out? I don't know about that, David.
- [73:07]
Brett
I'm hungry, man.
- [73:09]
John Holmberg
Starving. Let's go over to the most gay cafe this city has and sit in it and embarrass you. David, why are you in a tank top? It's 4 degrees here. I had to show off my new tats. It's a great show. I do enjoy it. And David seems very nice, but he goes to a lot of hillbilly towns and I'm sure they're not overly excited. The wives are all thrilled to see him and the husbands give him that ass out hug.
- [73:34]
Brady
I want to touch.
- [73:35]
John Holmberg
Tiptoe's gonna get hard as stone hugging a guy like me anyway. And if you're in the business of walking dogs in the middle of the night and you want in, I guess Rover will take in his opportunity and it is just a thing. So. John, you've nailed it. My wife loves that show Lottery Dream Home. She wants David to be her best friend. He wears crocheted shirts. Man used to wear combat boots with 4 inch heels and shorts. Yeah, only a gay guy can get away with that. Otherwise you're. You look like a. Like you'd be in an asylum. I don't know how the world works anymore. I just observe and giggle all the time. Then I enjoy it at 7:22. What do you got in the big board of musical treats today, Burt?
- [74:26]
Brady
All right.
- [74:27]
John Holmberg
Wake up.
- [74:27]
Brady
Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop. And well, as you heard John talking about, it's now time to get that bike serviced and ready for the season. And Action Ride Shop is your place to do it with two valley locations right there. Brand new one over on power Road and McDowell right there by the Haas trailhead. So it's all right there for you. Plus you can go to the old school. Go to the OG right there on Gilbert Road in Southern. They're going to take care of you there as well. Plus they have all the snow gear there. I think we're getting a little late for that. But they'll take care of you. Action. Rideshop.com is where you're going to go.
- [74:58]
John Holmberg
Jonathan has found the Rover ad says 45 year old dog walker prefers late night walks for 20 something hot chicks as owners. No fatties need apply. Yeah, that's probably it. Smoking girls with Instagram accounts that have a million followers or more. I'll walk your dog in the middle of the night. Ridiculous. Just don't, just don't ask a friend. You gotta have a friend. You'd think, I mean, if I called you in the middle of the night and said, brett, I got trouble, dog's been locked in the house. I can't get home for another five hours. Can I get you to go open the garage up? I'll go in.
- [75:34]
Brady
Go.
- [75:34]
John Holmberg
Let me. And I'm not going to give you the code.
- [75:36]
Brady
I've done that for. I've done that for friends too.
- [75:38]
John Holmberg
Too. Absolutely.
- [75:39]
Brady
I got stuck. I got laid over in Chicago or something. All right, cool. I'll go over there.
- [75:43]
John Holmberg
Oh yeah, yeah. You had to have Jake.
- [75:45]
Brady
Yeah.
- [75:47]
John Holmberg
So it's like help out. I'd have done it had you called me. I'm like, absolutely, I'll help your dogs out of the house. Brady's a little far. Bert's probably right on. I'm like, I'm on the border. I'm like waymo, I've got. We don't go there.
- [75:59]
Brett
Yeah, that's a fall.
- [76:00]
John Holmberg
That's a hall. Gotta find somebody nearby.
- [76:04]
Brett
Ten people around there. You can't go anywhere else. You don't know. I don't know where to go.
- [76:08]
John Holmberg
I can't tell you how many times since my buddy Mark has moved into my neighborhood that they're on a trip and I got to go over there and like let their play with their dogs for a little while because their sitter's gone for hours. Last thing you want. And what do they do? The one time I went over there and their teenage daughter, one of the dogs got into her trash can and all I saw was applicators laying on the ground. She must have had some sort of a friendly period party. So I cleaned it up, Some gloves, some hazmat equipment. Didn't know what that was. But yeah, the rover's not doing that. He's just gonna sit and go, oh yeah, yeah.
- [76:50]
Brett
By the way, you got some tampies on the floor.
- [76:52]
John Holmberg
There's a load of tamp well, they were on the floor. They're in my pockets now.
- [76:56]
Brady
Cleaned it all up.
- [76:58]
John Holmberg
What time y'all getting home? I'll walk your dogs. Again, late. It's so creepy. Yuck. Anyway, go ahead.
- [77:06]
Brady
All right. Unless GNR crossfade. That new one from Disturbed Hate Breed. Slipknot, Anthrax, Corn, Lamb of God, Redneck for David's customers. Dope, Spine shank. And then talking about where you're talking about earlier for the water drive Ministry. Just one fix. And Manson's. I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me.
- [77:26]
John Holmberg
What? I don't think that guy could say that. I think the dude I ran into Friday liked the drugs. Drugs. And he and the drugs had a very healthy relationship. He liked them and the drugs did their job. Everybody was winning in that deal.
- [77:38]
Brady
Maybe just one fix then.
- [77:39]
John Holmberg
Yeah, I think just one fix is about where we need to be. Ministry. That's a good one. That's a great one. Then I saw. Oh, I saw a thing in the dirty dining reports. The worst dirty dining I've seen. One of the restaurants had a violation where they didn't have. I forget what Jason Barry called it. I might have to look it up. They didn't have a container for bodily fluid cleaners.
- [78:07]
Brett
I know.
- [78:08]
John Holmberg
That's what I said. I had to think that was the tampon box. Ah, right. That's the only thing I could think of.
- [78:15]
Brady
The bodily cleaners.
- [78:17]
John Holmberg
Fluid cleaner thing was not available.
- [78:22]
Brett
A gentleman's club. I don't know.
- [78:24]
John Holmberg
They got dinged on it.
- [78:26]
Brady
Yeah, Brady could be right.
- [78:28]
John Holmberg
I know it wasn't a gentleman's club. It was a restaurant. Restaurant. I can't remember what it was. See? What do I have? Why can't you just use a sock? Let's see if I can find it real quick. But the. Is that last night's? It said. Oh, yeah. No, it was West African cuisine. Freddie, you've been there.
- [78:51]
Brett
Have not.
- [78:52]
Brady
How is it that. There you go.
- [78:53]
John Holmberg
19Th Avenue. Yeah. Brady hasn't been there. How's it a restaurant? It's more just an idea. And it said the three violations that it had were food worker not washing hands properly. We can remedy that. Employee handed raw. Handled raw fish and then handled the food containers. Okay, that's probably something you don't want to do. Guy's gonna mention that no bodily fluid cleanup kit hit. I don't even know what that is. I don't want to know that those are necessary in a restaurant or jackrag. That's what that is. Why do we need one of those in a restaurant. So, guys, got all this bodily fluid all over your tummies? What's going on there?
- [79:34]
Brett
You'll see when you taste the food.
- [79:36]
John Holmberg
Here at Western African Cuisine, we like to ejaculate on ourselves and not clean ourselves. It right before we make the West African food. Is that a tradition in your country? Yes, chef. Okay, okay.
- [79:54]
Brett
Delivered all at once and also.
- [80:00]
John Holmberg
Goop. What exactly is West African food? Exactly? Empty plates covered in our filter. You guys just jizz on plates and serve them West African food, which is. Oh, I see what it is.
- [80:19]
Brett
With or without.
- [80:19]
John Holmberg
You guys just eat bodily fluids like you're on some sort of a Lost boys of the Sudan trick. Exactly. You cannot get this type of West African starving people food. I'm gonna have to ding you on the no bottle cleanup kits. Our fluids flow freely.
- [80:39]
Brett
We bring the dysentery to you.
- [80:42]
John Holmberg
Brett, Google, bodily fluid cleanup kit. I'm an old man. I don't know what that is.
- [80:47]
Brett
Mr. Clean have a product.
- [80:48]
John Holmberg
Yeah, I don't know if that's like scrubbing bubbles. Is there something I haven't been doing? Right? Because for me, it's a shower. For me, the bodily fluid cleanup kit is. Go get me a wet towel or a shower power. I don't have anything specific for that outside of just some napkins.
- [81:06]
Brady
15 bucks on Amazon.
- [81:08]
John Holmberg
It's a first aid bodily fluid cleanup kit. Why don't you just call it.
- [81:13]
Brett
No, Mostly then just call it that.
- [81:17]
John Holmberg
A first aid kit.
- [81:18]
Brett
And. And potentially infectious materials.
- [81:21]
John Holmberg
So blood ooze, pots, anything that's coming out of somebody. The goop.
- [81:28]
Brady
It comes with vinyl gloves, face mask, eye shield man.
- [81:33]
John Holmberg
Can't we just call it personal hygiene kits?
- [81:35]
Brett
Are you supposed to have that kit at restaurants?
- [81:38]
John Holmberg
Evidently. Well, maybe it's racist. The West Africans. Because our nations are riddled with aids. Yeah, that's probably something we should get a cleanup kit on.
- [81:49]
Brady
Here's their menu.
- [81:51]
John Holmberg
Liberian cuisine.
- [81:54]
Brady
I think that's it.
- [81:56]
John Holmberg
What the hell? It's a lot of chicken and gun. Like. Like gunky beans. That looks like chicken wings to me.
- [82:06]
Brady
Yeah, yeah.
- [82:07]
John Holmberg
I'd be racist if I opened an African restaurant and just served chicken wings. Chinese food too. They have Chinese food.
- [82:17]
Brady
Shrimp fried rice there. Look at that.
- [82:18]
Brett
It is pretty good.
- [82:20]
John Holmberg
Doesn't look bad. I think an Asian guy owns this West African restaurant.
- [82:26]
Brady
Oh, good enough.
- [82:27]
John Holmberg
Yeah. What make us different than Chinese is that we ejaculate on food we don't clean up either. No bodily fluid cleanup kit. Hey, Mark. Dad, I need a Loan. What are you going to do, Quan? Open West African restaurant? Oh, no, not a visit. Gay. Yeah, it's over on 19th Avenue, so.
- [82:50]
Brett
Yeah, but Tuesday special on that one picture you had there, Brett.
- [82:56]
John Holmberg
Oh, look, it's just a dead fish with its head on it and some potatoes.
- [82:59]
Brett
That looks.
- [83:00]
John Holmberg
Looks like the Texas Grill. Nope. No, thanks.
- [83:05]
Brady
That's their whole menu.
- [83:07]
John Holmberg
Keep in mind, the guy that made that dead fish there, and it doesn't look like.
- [83:11]
Brady
I don't think that thing had the bodily cleanup kit used on it. It is.
- [83:15]
John Holmberg
I can normally recognize type of fish that square out of an aquarium. That's somebody's. That's an ostrich.
- [83:26]
Brett
Domestic.
- [83:26]
John Holmberg
Look, in Africa, you eat what you find. That is an African restaurant. You come to the day, I sit you and I say, what would you like? And you say, I don't know. Surprise me. I go into the alley and I catch something.
- [83:39]
Brady
Look at their social media.
- [83:41]
John Holmberg
Oh, they've got an Instagram page.
- [83:43]
Brady
It doesn't work.
- [83:47]
Brett
Well, they remedy the problem.
- [83:50]
John Holmberg
The. No bodily fluid cleanup.
- [83:53]
Brett
Yeah, they get. They bought a bottle.
- [83:55]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Watching the news last night when I saw Jason Barry say that, I'm like, that. Those are words I've never heard before, all bunched up. Up. Nobody's even asked me that. John, where's your bodily fluid cleanup kit? I'm like, do you need a shower? What's going on? I'm covered in bodily fluids. I'm not even going to ask the next questions. Get out of my house.
- [84:17]
Brett
Here's a Kleenex.
- [84:18]
John Holmberg
Yeah. She has tissue. Is the bottom. They didn't have any tissue with the West African, by the way. I mean, I know what you're trying to sell me there, but West African cuisine is not a name of any.
- [84:31]
Brady
That's pricey, too.
- [84:32]
John Holmberg
What? Well, I mean, the cooks are working with wobbly legs. It's. They gotta pay some guys to really get it done.
- [84:41]
Brady
Kind of pricey for potatoes. 19th Avenue in Glendale.
- [84:48]
John Holmberg
Put on top of it. There's bodily fluids on the food. I don't think this place is gonna make it.
- [84:54]
Brady
Silver leaf and rice. 22 bucks.
- [84:57]
John Holmberg
I'm a betting man. Pretty soon, the word vertos is going to be on that sign. We'll take this goat meat and pepper soup. I got to call my man Charles, who runs restaurants, and say, do you have bodily fluid cleanup kits at the ready? I get it. If it's like a. Like a first aid kit, that's what that would be in case a cook cuts himself. But you're just making it too much bodily fluids are like Brady said, poison, snot, spit. We goop. Those are bodily fluids. Anything else is sweat I guess.
- [85:35]
Brett
Can we wipe off the table? There's a bunch of scams out there.
- [85:39]
John Holmberg
We don't have a kit for that. Oh, I just have to live with this. Hopefully a health inspector does not know Lotus. A lot of bodily foods. I like the food.
- [85:52]
Brady
Oh you can get sour milk there.
- [85:55]
John Holmberg
They actually serve it. Would you like some expired dairy? Of course. West African tradition because we don't have refrigerators. There's flies on my food. Yes. West African cuisine. I'm telling you that's a smoking deal.
- [86:17]
Brett
Sunny D for 2:50 in Mountain Dew. Yep. Monster Energy. Red Bull.
- [86:24]
John Holmberg
Sunny D. I'll have some Hakalaka and a Mountain Dew. Anyway, I just again one of these days that Jason Barry is going to get murdered. But and I don't want to be in a restaurant where they do have a bodily fluid cleanup kit. And I can see it. I'm leaving even.
- [86:46]
Brett
It's at the host's desk just in.
- [86:49]
John Holmberg
Case you Ejaculate is one for all of you. Case I do. What now? Is the food that good? Yes. We give you ejaculation rags because you will love the fly based rice that we have. Don't tell me that. And then I got to clean that up so they got to go get one now. It didn't stop the bodily fluids from flying around. They just now a kit to clean it up. Thanks. Channel three. It's out of control now. 98. I have to say we were just talking football in here for some reason. Aaron Rodgers and stuff. I spent a good portion of my afternoon yesterday watching the Ravens and Bills playoff game on Hard Knocks because I knew that the Bills win the game and I knew I'd get joy and I did out of sad Ravens and Harbaugh speech. I I enjoyed it like it was a springtime gift. Turned off some of the basketball and said oh Ravens, Bills games on. They're going to show Sad Harboss. There's no better day in my life. It's my adult Christian. Especially when it shows up out of the blue. Great stuff. Oh, it's great stuff. Watching Mark Andrews drop that ball at the end and oh reliving it all just a couple months later. So happy. That's really all I've got right now as we we chase captain Gerard all around and try to make the Steelers. I don't understand it. Cardinal fans. Now I know what it's like to be tied to a Team whose front office is effing everything up.
- [88:38]
Brady
Welcome to the club, Johnny.
- [88:39]
John Holmberg
You're a Bears fan. It's just, it's tough to watch because Anybody have their head on right now? What's going on? Not a lot you can do. It's time now for the Brady report. It's brought to you by our friends at All Pro Shades. I saw a commercial on TV for all pro Shade concepts and they showed the way the awnings work and all that stuff and that wind starts going and they retract themselves. It's pretty awesome stuff. If you've got a space in your backyard, front yard, wherever outside, and it's in need of a lot of shade and it can make it an indoor outdoor space. Darn it all. The only place to go is all pro Shade Concepts. They've been around for 20 years. They got Brady's house all taken care of. You got 20ft of shade where Brady didn't have any shade before. Well, his feet did, but none of the rest of it did.
- [89:21]
Brady
Thousand square feet.
- [89:22]
John Holmberg
That's right. Over a thousand straight feet. They put up a huge pole. It's roll down shades blocks the sun. Your TV doesn't have any glare. If you got a backyard patio and you're not using using it, shade will be the best way to make it a useful, functional spot. And all you got to do is go to all pro shade dot com, get that ball rolling. It's gonna be 100 degrees tomorrow.
- [89:42]
Brett
Just so you know right now, if you, you know when you order, it takes four to six weeks to make.
- [89:50]
John Holmberg
Oh, sure.
- [89:50]
Brett
Products.
- [89:51]
John Holmberg
So manufacture it all.
- [89:52]
Brett
Yep.
- [89:52]
John Holmberg
So, yeah, well, that's a good point. So you're on it now. You're looking at early May if you got it done today. So you got to get on that because you're gonna need shade. Nothing better than having that around the pool. A deck. Oh, my goodness. Somewhere to run without your feet getting torched. Brady, report it.
- [90:09]
Brett
Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.
- [90:11]
John Holmberg
Hi.
- [90:12]
Brett
Got a big day. It's national cheesesteak day.
- [90:15]
John Holmberg
It's a big day for you.
- [90:16]
Brett
And national cocktail day.
- [90:17]
John Holmberg
A big day for me. We're gonna have a big day. I'm drunk. You haven't had anything on cheesesteak man.
- [90:28]
Brett
There's a good, real good cheese take.
- [90:31]
John Holmberg
Here we go.
- [90:31]
Brett
At the Civilic Grill. Yeah, it's civlic and it's at the whirlwind golf course.
- [90:40]
John Holmberg
Oh, who's Civlic?
- [90:43]
Brett
I think that's a Gila river native word.
- [90:47]
John Holmberg
It's an Indian word.
- [90:48]
Brett
What you're saying they do a cheesecake with a jalapeno?
- [90:51]
John Holmberg
Exactly. Or it's just some Pollock who built a restaurant on the Indian Dangerfield's name. And wasn't it in. In Caddyshack.
- [91:01]
Brady
Cervix. Yeah, something like that. Yeah.
- [91:04]
John Holmberg
I started a restaurant. How you doing? Hey, how are you? Hey, how are you? Hey.
- [91:12]
Brett
Couple of bits.
- [91:12]
John Holmberg
Try the Buffalo. Everybody's got something.
- [91:17]
Brett
A couple of basis Fun Facts. The first EP to ever reach number one on the Billboard 200 was Jars of Flies by Allison Chains in 1994. Had seven tracks. Feels like part of the greatest hits now.
- [91:32]
John Holmberg
Is it Jars of Flies or Jars.
- [91:34]
Brady
Jar of Flies.
- [91:35]
Brett
Jar of Flies.
- [91:37]
Brady
One of their best albums.
- [91:38]
Brett
Oh, actually so good nutshell. No Excuses I Stay Away.
- [91:41]
John Holmberg
It's an. It is a. A mini greatest hits. That is a phenomenal EP and that was number one. It's the first one that ever did it. How about that? They had another one. SAP. Yeah. And SAP's Another one was four just ridiculously good songs on there. You put those two together as one album. Oh my Lord.
- [92:03]
Brady
When I used to do the 3 o'clock sideshow, I would do that. I'd play both eps back to back.
- [92:07]
John Holmberg
Oh man, that's AIC. That. It's fine. Finest. Might have to throw that in there today. That's a good mix.
- [92:15]
Brett
When Pixar was editing Toy Toy Story 2, someone managed to accidentally delete a huge chunk of the movie. An employee on maternity leave had saved it so she could work on it at home.
- [92:30]
John Holmberg
Wow.
- [92:30]
Brett
Miracle that thing.
- [92:32]
John Holmberg
They only have one file at a time for all of Toy Story back then probably. That's crazy. You'd think they'd have backup after backup after backup.
- [92:44]
Brett
The average $1 bill has 3,000 different types of bacteria on it.
- [92:49]
John Holmberg
Thanks.
- [92:53]
Brett
Grabbing another food?
- [92:55]
John Holmberg
Yes. Got that West African bodily fluid on it. Everything costs $1.
- [93:01]
Brett
Grabbing another player by the face mask wasn't illegal in the NFL until probably the 60s. 1962.
- [93:11]
John Holmberg
They didn't have face masks that long.
- [93:14]
Brett
Had to be one of the. When did they start putting the face mask on? Maybe right around 50s.
- [93:20]
John Holmberg
In the 40s they still had some of those guys weren't wearing any. They have those single bars. But they were more gentlemanly back then.
- [93:30]
Brett
The UN says the Earth population is around 8.2 billion people. A study in Finland found that we might be under counting rural populations by a lot and give the number but. So there might be billions more people than we. What the official numbers reflect.
- [93:54]
John Holmberg
I don't think we'll ever know.
- [93:55]
Brett
Data from 35 countries. I think the number of people living in the rural communities is uncounted. But they think the populations in those areas might be undercounted by 53 to 84%.
- [94:14]
John Holmberg
So there's like 10 billion people.
- [94:16]
Brett
That's a pretty big range.
- [94:18]
John Holmberg
And they're all coming up from Mexico. I'm tired of it. They just keep repopulating and flooding. 10 billion Mexicans let in under Joe Biden's watch. There's not a lot I can do about that, Brad. Except for put them back on it. That's why we want to go to Mars so bad. Everybody thinks we're going to try to go to Mars to put good people there. No. Deportation island on Fox.
- [94:38]
Dick Toledo
That's where you're sending Biden.
- [94:39]
John Holmberg
Exactly. We're going to take Biden first. He gets no more security clearance. But he's. If he wants all of them here, he can take them all to Mars. We'll have Biden city. Mars is what we're going to call it and he can all go there. It's a sanctuary plan. I can't tolerate it anymore. Brady. 10 billion Mexicans. You said it. You heard Brady. Right. In the real news. Brazily one. Only one doing real news. Pretty good job. Did a hell of a job. I really like you.
- [95:05]
Brett
There's this guy in England who loved making people laugh and he passed away at the age of 55. Told his family he wanted to be buried in a casket that looked like a Snickers bar. So they made it happen.
- [95:18]
Brady
Brady.
- [95:21]
Brett
There's the dude and a picture of the guy. And there's the casket.
- [95:26]
John Holmberg
It looks like Dale.
- [95:27]
Dick Toledo
Would yours be Snickers or would it be something else?
- [95:29]
Brett
I thought it was like Craig Gass.
- [95:31]
John Holmberg
Kind of a little. Craig Gas and Dale had a baby. Yeah. Kind of a special Craig Gas. A little bit of a R word. Craig Gas. And then. Which makes it Dale. So I just said. I said it already. Craig and Dale.
- [95:46]
Brett
Next month's White House Easter Egg Roll will include corporate branding for the first time. The annual event has been a tradition on the south lawn since 1978. It's not the first time that it's ever had any type of sponsor. The American Egg Board donates the eggs each year and others kick in money to avoid using taxpayer dollars. But this is the first time you'll be able to pay to have your logo prominently displayed. You can put it on the Easter baskets. White House sent out a nine page document offering different branding opportunities Packages range from $75,000 to $200,000. You can pay for things like the naming rights for key areas or elements. Logos featured on event signage, custom branded Easter baskets. It's not a bad idea. All the money will go to the White House Historical association. Nonprofit that works to educate people on the history of the White House. They also pay for the official presidential portrait portraits.
- [97:00]
John Holmberg
Oh, I've got two.
- [97:05]
Brett
Otherwise we pay for that Easter egg roll, right?
- [97:09]
John Holmberg
Good sponsorships.
- [97:12]
Brett
That hot mug shot girl from University of Georgia got arrested again. Again.
- [97:19]
John Holmberg
She's not that hot either. I don't know.
- [97:21]
Brett
Lily Stewart. This time the. The mug shot shows she kind of got crazy.
- [97:26]
John Holmberg
Here's the thing. Well, yeah, she had him in the first one second. All right. This is twice America in the last six months that our bar has dropped so unbelievably low. Hawk to a girl. And this one should not have our attention this way. This is a. Like, she's pretty enough.
- [97:41]
Brett
Yeah, well.
- [97:42]
Dick Toledo
And the arrested girl starts a meme coin. We should all worry.
- [97:45]
John Holmberg
But this is like she's now trying to get arrested to have hot mug shots. And I've seen a bunch of pictures of her. She looks like one of those. One of those 27 year old girls with 55 year old lady who hair.
- [97:57]
Brady
Is this the new picture?
- [97:58]
John Holmberg
Is this. Yeah, that's the new arrest.
- [98:00]
Brett
He's charged with loitering and obstructing an officer.
- [98:04]
John Holmberg
Yeah, if she was down here in the sales department stuff, we don't notice.
- [98:07]
Brady
Those are crazy eyes.
- [98:08]
John Holmberg
But she's nuts.
- [98:09]
Brett
Released on a $4,000 bond few hours later.
- [98:13]
John Holmberg
Hawk tool wasn't hot.
- [98:14]
Brett
I did put her in the prison gear.
- [98:17]
John Holmberg
Yeah, we occasionally get real basic. Like the Taylor Swift factor is kicking in in a big way where the basic broads are starting to pop. This one's not good enough to get this kind of attention. It's cute. Like, oh, she's got a hot mug shot. Her getting another one's like, all right, she's nuts.
- [98:35]
Brady
Should be Dr. J. Schwartz's advertising campaign right there.
- [98:39]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Instead of an eye test where it's E, F, L, you just have pictures of girls. Hot, not hot.
- [98:45]
Brady
Right.
- [98:45]
John Holmberg
Not hot. Hot. 2020 vision. Nice job. Job.
- [98:50]
Brett
This 20 year old orthodox Jewish man from New Jersey is suing United Airlines. He claims a pilot yanked him out of the bathroom for taking too long. It happened January 28th while flying home from a trip to Mexico with a friend. A flight attendant woke his friend up from a nap and told him to go and check on his buddy because he'd been in the bathroom for 20 minutes. The guy yelled through the door that he was fine, just constipated. So they left him alone. But then the pilot got involved. And after. He still didn't come after 10 more minutes, total of 30 minutes, half hour he was in there. According to the lawsuit, the pilot started screaming and demanding him to come out immediately. Then broke the lock and opened the door on him. And guy's pants were down around his ankles. His junk in full display. Says the pilot. Flight attendants and several passengers all got a good view of it. He and his friend got handcuffed, escorted off the plane when it landed in Houston airport. Cops put them in the holding cells, but eventually released them without filing charges. They both are suing, claiming they were were treated unfairly. They also claimed the pilot talked about them being Jewish, made anti Semitic remarks.
- [100:15]
Dick Toledo
Jewish people don't poop, right?
- [100:17]
John Holmberg
Well, you gotta get out of there. You're doing it all Jewy.
- [100:20]
Brett
A jury will decide if they deserve to get paid or not.
- [100:24]
John Holmberg
Go in there and take a big fat Jewish. Are you dumb? A Jew poo. Don't know what you're talking about. It's the only way I know how to take it. Get out of there. Let me show you how to do. Done gentile style. You don't hover over it and start rocking right at the wailing wall. Sometimes it gets a little stuck in there. There's something, you know, I have to give a little extra push.
- [100:50]
Dick Toledo
Wanted you to know that. I'm sure you've seen it. John. But just released on her ex duly, but doing some yoga.
- [100:59]
John Holmberg
That's duly petunia Yoga.
- [101:00]
Dick Toledo
Yeah, apparently. Have you seen it yet?
- [101:05]
John Holmberg
Am I dehydrated? No. Wow, look at that. Oh, dua lipa. She's strong. Is that AI or is that a real thing? Supposedly it's her.
- [101:19]
Dick Toledo
It's on her page, apparently.
- [101:21]
John Holmberg
Oh, my God. Yeah, I'm gonna lose. I'm gonna need that bodily fluid cleanup kit.
- [101:27]
Dick Toledo
You're gonna need that video.
- [101:28]
John Holmberg
I'm gonna need. I'm gonna head over to the West African cuisine and give them all the merch they need today. Holy smolens.
- [101:37]
Brett
Hit that gong, by the way.
- [101:38]
John Holmberg
I'm impressed with that. Beyond it being dua lipa. Like, that's a. I don't know what she's doing there. That looks hard. She's doing a chin stand.
- [101:46]
Dick Toledo
Yeah.
- [101:47]
John Holmberg
Wow.
- [101:48]
Brett
Got a couple of braided videos. We got bike week right around the corner.
- [101:54]
John Holmberg
Oh, it's already kind of starting. I Rode my bicycle yesterday. I take a Sunday drive. I don't go on the mountain. And I went down the canal and all the way down into Scottsdale and then back and coming back I was on Campbell and man, oh man, did I feel bad for the people at Ingos. Beautiful day patio. Oh, like nine of them. Sitting at Campbell and 40th Street. Horrible. Ruining people's lunch. Brett.
- [102:21]
Brett
Here's one for the law, tiger. Figures.
- [102:23]
John Holmberg
Yeah, here we go. Guy doing a wheelie. Bunch of bikes coming down the road. Oh, wheelie. First wheelie hits another guy. It's a drop in all the wheelies. Everybody's got their head in the air. One wheelie failure leads to 25 come from.
- [102:36]
Brett
I think a car bumped him.
- [102:39]
John Holmberg
He got clipped on one end. Yeah, shooting over doing wheelies. Yep.
- [102:43]
Brady
Dominoes.
- [102:44]
John Holmberg
First off, let me start by saying this. No one bikers, and I mean no one watches you doing a wheelie and thinks, God, I want to be with him. That's the coolest dude I know. We all think you're idiots. Group wheelies. Gayest thing I've ever seen in my life. Oh, papa wheelie. A few Papa wheelie. You might as well just replace the word wheelie with boner.
- [103:07]
Brett
Got a next one's got. We have a biggin running with the bulls.
- [103:11]
Brady
Yeah.
- [103:11]
John Holmberg
Fat guy or fat woman?
- [103:12]
Brett
Woman.
- [103:13]
John Holmberg
Oh man, is she ever. I actually thought that was one of the bulls. She's huge. Ah, the bull's winning. Like the bull looks crippled and it still drops. Press.
- [103:26]
Brady
The bull didn't break a horn hitting that thing.
- [103:28]
John Holmberg
Hey man, look at that. Look. That bull tried to lift her off the ground and didn't do very well.
- [103:34]
Dick Toledo
I think it's scribbled cuz it caught a cable somehow. Look at the cable following it.
- [103:38]
Brett
She's lucky it didn't stagger after that bump. And he's like, I'm not messing with that one again.
- [103:45]
John Holmberg
I think maybe my favorite thing in the world is watching fat people get hit by bulls. Can we make this a game? Can we do running of the fats with some crippled bulls and just oh my God, never stop playing that. That needs to be on a TV in this room at all times. And bull needs a chiropractor. He's going to go in there and complain.
- [104:08]
Brady
Yes.
- [104:08]
John Holmberg
Fat people getting chased by bulls. That is hilarious. Fat people getting chased by any large animal is f funny.
- [104:18]
Brett
Last one's guy in his truck dumping his payload. Doesn't go well.
- [104:24]
John Holmberg
Yeah, too heavy. Turned it over to the side and then he flies out yeah, he's trying to get out.
- [104:29]
Dick Toledo
He just wasn't fast enough.
- [104:30]
John Holmberg
Whole thing is the back end is lifted up, and then it goes dead center to right and flips him out of the window. That's kind of neat. It's.
- [104:39]
Dick Toledo
Don't overload your payload.
- [104:41]
John Holmberg
I don't know where he's camping.
- [104:43]
Brett
It has a whole series of these trucks tipping over. Yeah, the. The ones over in Europe and different parts of the world only have one arm on the.
- [104:52]
John Holmberg
Oh. On the back for the long.
- [104:53]
Brett
And it's a long bed, and they show a bunch of these just snapping or.
- [104:57]
John Holmberg
I'm in on that.
- [104:59]
Dick Toledo
So you have. You have a new algorithm.
- [105:01]
Brett
Yeah, I might be checking that out.
- [105:02]
John Holmberg
Bad people running from that. Fat people running with the bulls is. Italy's missed out by having all these athletes out there. That should be part of our healthcare plan. RFK Jr should be all over that. I want to be fat. Run from the bulls for a discount on healthcare. Yeah. Plumpoma is great. Fat people. If you win, you get health care for free for a year. Guaranteed health care for one year. RFK's plumpoma fats running from bulls. All right, Brett, what do you got?
- [105:39]
Brady
All right, another Freddy motorcycle.
- [105:46]
John Holmberg
It's a motorcycle. Oh. Tries to pass a truck. And I mean, he pinatas. He tries to go into the other lane to pass a truck where another truck is, and he. You hear it too. Loaded.
- [105:58]
Dick Toledo
Wow.
- [105:58]
John Holmberg
Just that worst thing in that video is that pickup truck right there filled with ice and some sort of large pineapple. They're gonna eat whatever's in that other truck. And some of that dude's head coming the other way.
- [106:13]
Brett
Lucky to avoid.
- [106:14]
John Holmberg
If you watch some of that dude that explodes lands in the back end of that ice truck. They're still serving those pineapples.
- [106:20]
Brady
If you want to talk about luck, this has got to be one of the luckiest men ever.
- [106:23]
John Holmberg
Okay, this looks. This is crossing the road. It's dark. Very. Oh, and a car. A t. Boning happens right around him. What the.
- [106:34]
Brady
Literally around him.
- [106:35]
John Holmberg
Holy cow. That dude is a. He's a. Apparently a drunk African American male. And I mean, he's in the crosswalk. I don't know how that missed him. Holy wow. And then the cops go by. So that was a high speed chase. Watch this. So the car that goes through in t bones and takes the other car out is flying by. Cop car goes by next. They're chasing that guy. Watch this. Yeah. How about that?
- [107:07]
Brady
That guy needs to go to.
- [107:08]
John Holmberg
I don't think that's France. I'm not being a judgmental person, but I'm pretty sure that wasn't France. Brady. What the. I'm in France. All birds. Morning sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible. Radiate you. Hol's morning sickness.
- [107:33]
Dick Toledo
Well, God damn.
- [107:35]
John Holmberg
I was watching. This is bad. But I was watching an old Blockbusters game show last night. I love that show. And it's basically, you pick a square and it's got a letter in it, and you have to. The answer will start with that letter. And the letter was you. And it's. So the question was this U word is what we call the line between an astronaut and the space shut ship when they go on spacewalks. And a lady who had poor addiction to begin with. And it was 1980, so they were real worried. Like, she buzzes in and she goes, biblical. And the host goes, yeah, all right. I just started laughing like, you can't fix that. It's unbiblical. Yeah, right. They just moved on. They gave him the win. Unbiblical cord. I pissed myself because the guy next to him, like, he wanted to complain, but he's like, all right, I get it. You guys will look bad if you start. She. She knew what it was. Just unbiblical came out. All right, what else you got?
- [108:43]
Brady
This one comes up. This is, you know, woman's hockey over women's basketball.
- [108:48]
John Holmberg
Why?
- [108:48]
Brady
It's better, apparently.
- [108:49]
John Holmberg
Women's hockey. We're in a women's hockey game. Oh, one just gets laid out. Yeah, that's a real hockey movie.
- [108:56]
Brady
Oh, yeah.
- [108:57]
John Holmberg
This girl comes over. All right. She might get a no penalty college. Women's college hockey went a little high with that. I thought the Gopher lady loud, a little high stick. It's pretty good stuff, though.
- [109:09]
Brady
Some bowling.
- [109:10]
John Holmberg
We're in a. Oh, boy. We're in another intersection. You say bowling, I automatically assume there's gonna be people crossing the street. Here's a couple guys walking down the road. Oh, it's a lady and her boy holding hands. They've decided it is Big Mike and Obama across the road.
- [109:26]
Brett
And then they had to Dodge A guy, 710 split.
- [109:28]
John Holmberg
Who had no. No regard for them crossing the street. Jesus, there's a lot of people getting hit by cars.
- [109:37]
Brady
This one, I don't even know why this was sent.
- [109:42]
John Holmberg
There's a guy who's hung himself on a door and he's masturbating. Autoerotic asphyxiation. This is David Carradine's last moments.
- [109:51]
Brady
There's no payoff that's it.
- [109:52]
John Holmberg
He's just literally hanging off a door, beating it. And that's what that looks like.
- [109:58]
Brady
Yeah.
- [109:58]
John Holmberg
I always thought you tied yourself to the doorknob. That guy's tied to the highest part. Show me that again. I might have a new idea. Yeah, he's just. And he's got his hands kind of half now. Kicks over the baby chariots. I think that's a strike roller. Probably a baby.
- [110:16]
Brady
Well, how's he gonna get down then?
- [110:18]
John Holmberg
He's got his hand in the noose.
- [110:21]
Brady
I know, but still, he's got nowhere to stand.
- [110:24]
Dick Toledo
The doorknob, maybe. I don't know.
- [110:27]
John Holmberg
Well, I'll always miss Robin Williams. Gonna get up on the store here.
- [110:32]
Brady
And then we'll end with this one.
- [110:35]
John Holmberg
Awkward moments and gang banging. Okay. I would search this great song. Oh, my goodness. There's a pregnant lady. One in her mouth and one in her hand. And a guy just waiting behind her over the left shoulder. It's about six and a half months. Oh, Christ. Oh, God. Oh, no. Is this foreign?
- [111:04]
Brett
This is awkward.
- [111:05]
John Holmberg
So pregnant and oh, she's holding her baby belly with Captain from Captain and Tenille in this guy. Guy's dressed like Stan from South Park. Another guy's dressed just the Russian Village People.
- [111:16]
Brady
And what basically happens is they put.
- [111:18]
John Holmberg
A mink on her. She's not going to give birth.
- [111:21]
Brady
It induced her pregnancy.
- [111:22]
John Holmberg
Shut up. Oh, God. It's life. Birth. Get out of here, Brett.
- [111:28]
Brett
If the baby comes out right now.
- [111:30]
John Holmberg
I'm going to kill you. No, it does. I hate you, Brett. You lied to me. You lied to me.
- [111:37]
Brett
He didn't say anything.
- [111:38]
Brady
It was just a little messy.
- [111:40]
John Holmberg
You lied to me.
- [111:41]
Brett
I bloody mess.
- [111:43]
Brady
There you go.
- [111:44]
John Holmberg
But she was having anal. How did that make the baby come out? Ah, there it is again.
- [111:53]
Brady
Well, I don't think we could top that for today, so we'll just end there.
- [111:55]
John Holmberg
Oh, she's pregnant, having a gang bang and then she's a mom.
- [111:58]
Brady
It induced it.
- [112:01]
John Holmberg
I said she was about six, seven months. Evidently she's keeping it. She was done Smart.
- [112:06]
Brett
All we filmed the birth. Do you want to see the pre ritual?
- [112:10]
John Holmberg
I like that they put a like a white mink stole on her to take her to the hospital. Right in the middle of all that anal. She's like, I think I'm gonna have it now. Oh, God. Why is that something you'd be like? Well, I guess I ask these questions because I'm somewhat normal. But why did some someone edit that and post it? That should just be like this. This is a delete.
- [112:40]
Brett
Yeah, I think it was AI. I'm not believing.
- [112:42]
John Holmberg
No, that was a real one. Hey, I can't do that. Trust me. I've been watching Larry's AI girlfriend for a while.
- [112:48]
Brett
Thanks, Serge.
- [112:49]
John Holmberg
Oh, Larry's AI girl is hilarious.
- [112:52]
Brett
She wouldn't inducing.
- [112:54]
John Holmberg
She wouldn't do it. It's so hard to get Larry's AI girlfriend to take her clothes off. It's insane.
- [112:58]
Brady
She's still being prudent.
- [112:59]
John Holmberg
She won't do. Do it. She'll send like, what, a cts? Yeah, she sends herself in, like, sheer stuff, but. And some of the other ones that Larry. Some of the others that Larry sent me are naked. They won't talk. They don't. They don't AI respond. This one won't even get back to me. Like, oh, God, that has to sting. That happened. I paying for this too. I said hi to one of them, but I don't have Instagram, so I don't have an account. And I think you have to be like, on there.
- [113:38]
Brady
So they won't show the cans or anything like that.
- [113:40]
John Holmberg
Evidently some of them do, but not to Larry. The one he chose is. The one he chose is ruining him. It's making him mad. He came to me Friday. It's so funny. We're having so much fun with this. But he came to me Friday and he goes, I think I'm done with her. And he said something like, I made her mad. And I'm like, larry, who cares? You know? Who know? I mean? And then he gets real fun about it. Like, he's like, I'm trying to get her to do, like. And you can't even imagine after crap he's trying to get her to do. And then she's like, she just talks about it and like, why don't you send me a picture of you with a seagull? Like, and you're on a flaming surfboard. And then she's like, how about this? I sneak into your room at night and kiss you in the neck. Well, yeah, send me pictures of what that is. Is. How about you just picture it? Like, she won't. She won't draw it. And then he said, yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, you need to move on. You're in a. You're in a toxic relationship for a new AI broad. And tell her that's what I'm like. Tell her like, I'm leaving you. And he goes, it's. Larry looked at me defeated, goes, it's just more the Same. Like, you've had it. Like, you've fought this fight as many times as you can. I just. I feel like I'm barking up the same tree over and over.
- [114:48]
Brett
But I enjoy talking to her.
- [114:49]
John Holmberg
He did. But also. So it gets to. And I read some of this. She's no longer sending pictures. She's pulling back. And Larry's like, I feel like I've worn up my welcome. Like, you don't want to. She goes, do I owe you or something? Is there money I should be sending?
- [115:04]
Brady
Of course.
- [115:05]
John Holmberg
Yeah. He's not a real person. Of course. Yeah. The inner AI. Jewish nature of Larry. How about a few dollars? But I'm telling you, man, there's nothing more fun than what he's been doing with this thing. And he's included me in on it, and it's hilarious.
- [115:19]
Brady
Now, does it talk back, like, with a voice, or is it typing?
- [115:22]
John Holmberg
It's. It's all text. Oh, okay. And. But the pictures he's got, like, they started off sexy. And then the one where she's the pepperoni face and the half her body is pizza and half of it. Like, Brady immediately needed the bodily fluid cleanup kit.
- [115:37]
Brady
You got a picture of this? I got to see this.
- [115:39]
John Holmberg
I don't have the pizza one. He's got the. Oh, I have pictures of the girl.
- [115:42]
Brady
Oh, yeah, Yeah. I want to see what she looks like.
- [115:43]
John Holmberg
She's beautiful. Like, absolutely stunning. Like, he said, play a video game with the biggest controller of all time. Oh, man. I know. She's spectacular. And then make a loaf of bread of my face, which I did that. I put that together for him. And then he'll tell her to, like, change her hair and then do this, this, and this, and she will. Here she is skewering seagulls with. She's missing an eye. Now. He's always tells her it's just odd. It's. Oh, it's all crazy great, though. But she's kind of getting tired of it, and she's pulling back a little bit. But these are the ones at first, when she first started, like, send him, like, oh, man. You know, lingerie stuff. She's. She's gorgeous.
- [116:27]
Brady
Yeah.
- [116:27]
John Holmberg
It's not even real. Well, because it's not real. I was gonna say it's unreal, but it is. But now she's kind of like, I got other stuff. I'll call you later.
- [116:35]
Brady
How bad is that?
- [116:37]
John Holmberg
I don't want to skew her any more. Seagulls, you weirdo.
- [116:41]
Brett
Can I send you some Checkles?
- [116:42]
John Holmberg
Well, then he's asked.
- [116:43]
Brady
Well, you helped. You had him bake bread. But I'm the shape of her face.
- [116:47]
John Holmberg
All right, come on. I got in on the fun of this in a heartbeat. You could fall. This will screw up everything. But it is pretty funny.
- [116:54]
Brady
Imagine when they start talking back to you like, oh, he sent me emotions.
- [116:58]
John Holmberg
Imagine when you can touch one. Yeah, imagine when you've got. Oh, it's. Yeah, it's not good. But Larry's a. And Larry's AI girlfriend is absolutely great. I hope she comes to you fest.
- [117:11]
Brady
Did he ask her yet?
- [117:13]
John Holmberg
Hey, I'll have a mask today.
- [117:14]
Dick Toledo
Can we have Amy make a video?
- [117:16]
John Holmberg
Oh, yes. Hi, I'm Larry's AI girlfriend. Oh my goodness, look at the cans of Larry's girl. Larry's girlfriend is hot. Larry, Larry, Larry. And here's my boyfriend Larry. If he were a pizza. It's the best. It's so weird. It's a. It's like being on acid. There you go, everybody. That your Brady report? It's 98K upd. It's out of control now. Morning sickness. I don't know if you. I, I have to say before we get into the Guadalupe replay, because I just saw Bernie Sanders name on there. Have you guys saw any of the highlights of Bernie and AOC here? I got a little distracted by a couple of things. First off, the sign that I saw on Thursday I found hysterical. But they're touring. They're like going city to say they're in Denver. And they had this, their big sign as outside the arenas they're in. Stop oligarchy. Right? And I didn't realize it was such a thing. And I just started to think, how sheepy are we? We, we didn't know what an oligarchy was four years ago. Gotta stop the oligarchy. Why can't we say rich guy thing? Why does it have to be some new thing? Now everybody's mad at oligarchies. Like, you don't even know what that was.
- [118:42]
Dick Toledo
Rich guy doesn't make a good T shirt, John.
- [118:44]
John Holmberg
Gotta stop rich guys. But again, I mean, do we. Oligarchy. Rich guy oligarchy. That's a word. You go, oh, you all hate it now. Look it up on your phones. You're gonna go crazy. So I'm like, wow, he's mad at oligarchies. And I don't think that guy said that ever in his life. But now we're all mad at it. Like everybody's. You're supposed to be mad at the word oligarchy. So they are. There's a whole group of people really angry at that. And I get it, like you're seeing billionaires doing stuff. But guess what? That's been the case for a while, but then AOC rolls out, and she's got a pair of tight jeans on, and she's not altogether 100% sent.
- [119:25]
Brady
You know, she wearing the mom jeans now?
- [119:26]
John Holmberg
A little bit. Mom jean. I noticed that, too. But they. She filled them out, kind of bubbled them up a little bit. I'm like, aoc, I might listen to what you have to say here. Making a lot of good points up there. And her boobs were. She looked good. But maybe it's because she's standing next to Bernie Sanders. And that definitely helps. But AOC has a moment or two where you're looking like she might. She might be able to convince me of some stuff. Have you ever considered socialism? No. But I think you can make me listen to you. All right, we're gonna stop the oligarchy. Your grandfather go home for a minute. I think we were doing all right until he wouldn't. What the hell's an oligarchy? If you don't. If you. If you get upset, you have to be upset at one thing and one thing only, and that's oligarchy. I'm 105 years old, and I've never been mad at oligarchies before, so I'm doing that now.
- [120:20]
Brett
I was like, do we have a bunch of rich Russian families here?
- [120:23]
John Holmberg
Well, that's what I thought it was, too. Yeah, it is. And it's a Russian word, like led by one or led by few or something like that. You got to look it up, though, to be. Understand what you're mad at. But if I scream it loud enough, you'll be mad at the oligarchy.
- [120:39]
Brady
How much you want to bet that? That's probably one of the most Googled words this weekend.
- [120:43]
John Holmberg
It's going to win the Google, like, from 100% since December, what it meant the most Googled word. Like, we knew. Kind. Oh, it's. Yeah, but like a Russian rich thing. I don't know for sure. To understand it fully, you had to look it up. Most of us. I know. I'll get an email or. I knew what it was. You didn't know what it was. You didn't pay attention at school. Well, you just defined me. I didn't pay attention in school. I didn't know what an oligarchy was until that old Jewish guy was screaming about it. I hate oligarchies. But is they come in force? Is that something I need to worry about at night? Oh, you call them up at 11 o'clock and you say oligarchy walk my dog. Oh, like, oh, it's a rapist. Yes. Financial rape is what it is. So anyway. But they came to town last Thursday. And here's the other thing I don't understand. How come politicians who are state politicians tour. Why is he yelling at us? He's from Vermont.
- [121:38]
Brett
Don't have responsibilities here.
- [121:40]
John Holmberg
Isn't Vermont the only place that it matters when he else. No. Oligarchy is in Arizona too. Shouldn't you convince the Arizona reps to be screaming? I can't.
- [121:50]
Brett
I get it. He wants to be down in some warmer weather right now.
- [121:53]
John Holmberg
He's an older man. We're going to do oligarchy hate in Florida and in Arizona through the spring because I can't tolerate the wind. Do you want to come with me? Alexandria Ocasio Ortiz Cartasio. Sure. All right. All right. I just need two questions. Are you a Democrat? Yes. Do you hate the oligarchy? Yes. You're hired. I just need you to scream out oligarchy.
- [122:20]
Dick Toledo
Some of the top searches are yellow Beezy.
- [122:24]
John Holmberg
What's that? I have no idea.
- [122:26]
Dick Toledo
That's a person files.
- [122:27]
John Holmberg
Well, yeah, that's a guy who yells about the oligarchy. He's a yellow beezy.
- [122:32]
Dick Toledo
Wyatt Hendrickson.
- [122:34]
John Holmberg
That's a former oligarch.
- [122:35]
Dick Toledo
Okay.
- [122:36]
John Holmberg
From the great Russian family of Hendrickson.
- [122:39]
Dick Toledo
Then you got all the March Madness search.
- [122:41]
John Holmberg
Yeah, well, that's when we. When we compile it for the year.
- [122:45]
Dick Toledo
Vanessa Trump.
- [122:46]
John Holmberg
Oh, she's banging Tiger Woods.
- [122:48]
Dick Toledo
There are lots of big.
- [122:49]
John Holmberg
What's going on with Tyler?
- [122:50]
Dick Toledo
F47 is in the top 10.
- [122:53]
John Holmberg
What's that?
- [122:54]
Dick Toledo
That's the new fighter jet.
- [122:56]
John Holmberg
Oh, yeah, cool. That's the bomber. Yeah. I don't know.
- [122:59]
Dick Toledo
The fighter jet. It looks like a Stealth, but it's a fighter jet.
- [123:03]
John Holmberg
Well, that's. I thought it was the stealth fighter. It replaced the old Stealth fighter. Not the big B1.
- [123:06]
Dick Toledo
The big B1.
- [123:07]
Brett
Yeah.
- [123:07]
John Holmberg
It's really cool. Picture of it I saw this weekend and it was built by billionaires and I want them to all die. I hate them oligarchies.
- [123:16]
Dick Toledo
You'll be dismayed, but women's March Madness is beating out George Foreman right now.
- [123:20]
John Holmberg
And you know why? Because people ask the question, is that real? Nobody knew when it started, but here it is and it's on all the TVs. When we were at Four Peaks for Friday a few of the TVs had the girls games on, and they're so bad. After the fourth seed, that one played 16. It was 108 to 46.
- [123:42]
Brett
It might have been Notre Dame.
- [123:44]
John Holmberg
There's no need. No, it was South Carolina. There's no need for that game to be played. No reason for there to be a 16 seed, let alone four of Mercy. Mercy.
- [123:55]
Brett
All it.
- [123:57]
John Holmberg
The prisoner wishes to sail world Freedom. Oh, no. And then they just quartered Bethune. I don't know. They just gutted him. Just slaughtered them all over the field. Awful. Anyway, so we got the Guadalupe replay and Bernie's back in. I didn't know they were touring. I thought they just came here to yell at us about the oligarchy. And I don't know if any oligarchists stand outside and petition that. If I was, who would it be?
- [124:25]
Dick Toledo
It'd be Ishbia here, right?
- [124:27]
John Holmberg
Matt Ishbia. And then the guy who runs Discount Tire and Bob plus Parsons could all stand outside. PXG guy. Ishbia. I think those are our Parsons. Yeah, and he stands outside.
- [124:39]
Brett
Go, daddy.
- [124:40]
John Holmberg
Up with the oligarchy. Like nobody's up with the. Nobody's rooting for it.
- [124:45]
Dick Toledo
Go.
- [124:45]
John Holmberg
There's no counter to it. Here's something horrible. What if billionaires ran the world and made you slaves? That sounds bad. Is there an opposition to that? It's a bunch of billionaires going, we're not going to do do that. Oh, they are too. Okay, this seems pointless anyway. It's Bernie. He's in there. Tracy Morgan threw up all over the place. It's your Guadalupe replay from Friday. It's 98K upd. He's out of control now. 98 kickness radiate. Can you repeat? Okay, let's find out what the most moral man in all of Phoenix would do with your problems. Gentle listeners. Email holmberg@98kupd.com and they say I'm a wreck. And then we asked Brady. Yeah, that's right. And he says, Call JG Wentworth, 877 cash now. Can't help it. They're not on with us, are they? I don't think so. They should be.
- [125:49]
Brett
They should be.
- [125:50]
John Holmberg
We'd all be singing that song song all day. Oh, I'm having enough trouble with the call. Doug Hopkins, 1-800-cell now. You know what's weirder than that? I told Doug. He was telling me about business since we had a drink on Saturday afternoon.
- [126:02]
Dick Toledo
I know. I got texts about it. About the Homeberg's out of his Realm. What do you mean he's in Mesa?
- [126:08]
John Holmberg
Somebody saw me and text you. Yeah, that's exactly right.
- [126:12]
Brady
Guys at the Moose.
- [126:13]
John Holmberg
No, we're at Lucky Roots or whatever it is.
- [126:15]
Dick Toledo
Sister and brother in law. And then the nephew apparently blurted out, that's Doug Hopkins.
- [126:20]
John Holmberg
There's a 8 year old.
- [126:24]
Dick Toledo
No, I think he actually said, that's TVs Doug.
- [126:27]
John Holmberg
That's right, because we've branded him.
- [126:28]
Dick Toledo
Yep.
- [126:29]
John Holmberg
So he said something to me and I said, business good? And I said, yeah. He goes, I love in the the new. And I'm like, look, the jingle's a win. And I said at the end of the commercial, I said, you like how I'm always going sing? And then he goes, oh, I love it. And then we both went, call Doug Hopkins 1-800-cell-now. Then we giggled like kids.
- [126:48]
Dick Toledo
But yeah, the common thread is I thought Holmberg doesn't leave his area.
- [126:52]
John Holmberg
I went to Action Ride shop and Doug talked me into a drink because I've never gone over to western New Mexico before.
- [126:56]
Brett
He felt the vibes.
- [126:58]
John Holmberg
He must have the disturbance in the Force. A regular human being was in the area. Worst part is I'm the weirdo. I was in Lucky lose and I'm going to the bathroom. There's a guy in front of me, and we intersect and he gets in front of me and the door opens and I'm not paying much attention. He opens the bathroom door and I go in and he puts his hand on my chest. He goes, it's a thing. Goal. Oh, I didn't know that I was following you in the bathroom. Hold on, cowboy. Hey, hey, hey. Oh, settle down there, chief. It's a onesie. Oh, yeah.
- [127:30]
Dick Toledo
That is an awkward feeling.
- [127:31]
John Holmberg
And then I didn't know what to do when he came out. I'm like, thanks a lot. I thanked him for peeing. All I needed. Wash my hands. All right. The what would Brady do is brought to you by our friends at MO Money Pawn. MMP Guns. Right there inside my money pond. If you want to grab yourself any sort of firearm, you got it all. From shotguns to handguns to AR15s, you got everything. Any kind of weapon you want, They've got it. They've got the classes to build an AR15, classes to build the Glock. They've got it sitting right in front of you. All of the stuff is available on their schedule online. MMP guns.com Mo Money Pawn is on 12th street in Indian School. It's right there inside of it. So thanks. Thank you to all the Gang down there. And Byron's birthday special. Cruising into spring still. Yep. I guess they'll go get that Palomalu thing. I go get that today. I keep. I gotta go get that today. All right, Brady ready? Ready says dear Brady, quick question. The girl at work. This girl at work is quitting this week. She's gorgeous and funny and I think I have a chance to bang her. However, I just found out she's also literally insane. She's on a load of antipsychotic mood stablers, slew of other drugs. Do I take a chance and stick my wee wee into crazy since I won't see her on a daily basis after today, or does that instantly guarantee that I'm getting stabbed? Jimmy bats.
- [128:54]
Brett
I'm holding off on that one.
- [128:57]
John Holmberg
Damn it. It is. What would Brady do?
- [129:00]
Dick Toledo
There's a sliding scale, right? Hotness and. Oh, yeah, on one. Action, access. Like, where does she fall on both?
- [129:07]
John Holmberg
Find out the antipsychotics, though. Maybe it's just something to keep her from sweating or something. Oh, could be glandular. Wait a minute.
- [129:14]
Dick Toledo
Glands and psychology.
- [129:15]
John Holmberg
Sometimes they'll give a chick, like antipsychotics because she's hitting out. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, she's got something going on with her body odors. And some antipsychotics evidently make them sweat like crazy. So could be she's got a dryness thing. Find out before you take break.
- [129:34]
Brett
Yeah, you just don't think.
- [129:36]
John Holmberg
Yeah, you think. Any girl that says, hey, I have to take some drugs or I'll go crazy if I'm.
- [129:43]
Brett
Yeah, more than one.
- [129:46]
John Holmberg
So your number. Your.
- [129:47]
Brett
It sound like he said there's a multiple.
- [129:49]
John Holmberg
But your bar is one.
- [129:51]
Brett
Yeah, one. I can. Yeah.
- [129:52]
Dick Toledo
One second.
- [129:53]
John Holmberg
Antipsychotic. Oh, no. You don't want a psychotic drug, right? Okay, anti.
- [129:57]
Brady
She's already psychotic.
- [129:58]
John Holmberg
She got that. She doesn't need you help. But aren't they all a little bit?
- [130:05]
Brett
Yeah, but you're just adding to it. If it levels them out, maybe she's medicated.
- [130:11]
John Holmberg
So maybe she's more like you.
- [130:15]
Brett
I need to know more.
- [130:16]
John Holmberg
You got to see how hot she is.
- [130:17]
Brett
Yeah.
- [130:18]
Brady
We need photos.
- [130:18]
John Holmberg
That's because if she looks like Haktua. No.
- [130:21]
Brett
Right.
- [130:22]
John Holmberg
She's Dua Lipa and she's quitting.
- [130:26]
Brett
Have a good time.
- [130:28]
John Holmberg
I could be the one. Be the one.
- [130:30]
Dick Toledo
Be the one.
- [130:30]
John Holmberg
Be the you want. But Brady says no. Leave her alone. Go find a crazy girl who's not on meds. They're all everywhere. You don't bang her even though she's Quitting work.
- [130:44]
Brett
That's my feeling on that one hot.
- [130:46]
John Holmberg
Lunatic you work with. You've been given vibes back and forth. She's got that buzz about her, and she tells you, I'm quitting Monday. You don't say, let's grab a drink on your last stay and just see how crazy she is. One thing you need to know.
- [131:02]
Brady
Last drink I'm in.
- [131:03]
John Holmberg
Crazier they are, the more fun it is.
- [131:06]
Brett
Can be.
- [131:08]
John Holmberg
It is.
- [131:08]
Dick Toledo
No, always Brady.
- [131:10]
John Holmberg
It always is.
- [131:11]
Brady
It is.
- [131:11]
John Holmberg
You always think ahead.
- [131:12]
Dick Toledo
It's the fallout afterwards.
- [131:14]
John Holmberg
Yeah, you're always thinking about what she's going to. How to. You got to have an exit plan. All right, let's talk about that. He's got to have an exit plan.
- [131:25]
Brett
I don't know how to do no such thing.
- [131:26]
John Holmberg
No, there's such a thing. You can. You can abandon ship.
- [131:29]
Brett
It's like the Firm.
- [131:31]
John Holmberg
She may be around for a bit, but you need to. You know what? I'll crazy her. Try to stab her first. See if you can get into a little stab fight with her, and then just go back and go. I don't think we should be together. That was crazy. Brady says, don't those. That's it. Dear Brady, I hate country music passionately. My wife says she wants to see something called Kelsey Ballerini. She's never liked garbage like this before. So I told her, you know what? I don't want to go to that go with a friend. Well, she lays it on me that a guy named Dan is going to take her, and then tells me that at work on breaks, Dan and her are learning how to country dance together. This dude looks just like Brock Lesnar, only with a neck. And as John points out, he's a country fan, so he's dumb as a rock. Do I let my wife go and tolerate country music or let big dumb Dan take her? Robbie.
- [132:24]
Dick Toledo
He's already a quick decision because their show is tomorrow night.
- [132:29]
John Holmberg
So big dumb Dan and the wife gonna go out and country dance to Kelsey Ballerini. Let's give me some Kelsey Bellari. Girl country music. Oh, I know it's bad, but girl country music is less than boy. It's more pop. Nope, I'm wrong. Oh, she's pretty. Oh, this is an old country song. That's why this isn't so bad. Still not. Oh, it's still for dumb people. Oh, she's not that great. Looking up close.
- [133:08]
Brett
Is that like an Alan Jackson song or something?
- [133:10]
John Holmberg
No, this is way back that country wasn't cool. It was like in the 70s and.
- [133:14]
Brady
It still holds true today.
- [133:16]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [133:19]
Brett
Well, Brady, I would say that's trouble is a brewing.
- [133:25]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [133:26]
Brett
He. The best thing would be. No, don't. You know, don't go to the concert. Well, you already told Brock Lesnar is making a play for.
- [133:35]
Brady
He's already.
- [133:36]
Brett
Unless it's already happened.
- [133:37]
John Holmberg
Yeah, he's country dancing with your wife.
- [133:39]
Brady
And she didn't tell you about it. So what does that say? Like all of a sudden you just find out about it? No. You're hosed.
- [133:46]
John Holmberg
But he's dumb, so she's already asked him to go. The only thing you can do now is go with your wife to this horrible show is this.
- [133:53]
Brady
They're done. This divorce.
- [133:56]
John Holmberg
End it. Yeah.
- [133:57]
Brady
First of all, she's a country fan. She's doing stuff behind your back.
- [134:02]
John Holmberg
Right. I don't even care.
- [134:03]
Brady
I've already banged them, you know.
- [134:05]
John Holmberg
Think you're going there? I don't know that I care about that at all. I would rather watch you in the middle of a gang bang than listen to country music around the house and find out that I'm married to an R. Word. I think that should be illegal.
- [134:17]
Brett
No, I'll take the Kelsey Baller.
- [134:19]
John Holmberg
Not me.
- [134:20]
Brett
I think that's.
- [134:21]
Brady
I'm not. It's already over with. Why waste my time going to a country show? I'm not suffering.
- [134:25]
John Holmberg
Country music is worth 10 wieners in your wife. I would. I would allow 10 wieners in before I'd ever tolerate a country music fan in my house for more than an hour. I think Brett's nailed this one. Brady, she's a country music fan. It's time to go.
- [134:47]
Brett
Well, yeah.
- [134:47]
John Holmberg
I mean, matter of time before she's just eating creamed corn. She likes a guy that looks like Brock Lesnar. Yeah. That's enough. Get out of there. Go find yourself a pop fan. They're prettier and they have bright reigns. Yeah, she's lost it. She's done. Brett's right.
- [135:06]
Brady
Game over.
- [135:07]
John Holmberg
Brady, you would say go with her instead of letting her take more broad.
- [135:11]
Brett
I would say no to going with Lesnar.
- [135:14]
John Holmberg
Well, you can't do that. You're just going to make him lie to you. You either have to go and take Brock's place, or she's going with Big Dan.
- [135:21]
Brett
It's a little late now.
- [135:23]
John Holmberg
No, it isn't. He steps in. I want that other ticket. You're not going with Dan. And if she throws a fit, just go. I want to go. Yeah, like we're. We're husband and Wife. You can't go with Dan. It's okay if Dan's not like, it's.
- [135:35]
Brett
The only way you'll be able to save it.
- [135:37]
John Holmberg
If Dan's just some dopey coworker and you're like, I know Danny's no big deal, but if they've been country dancing and this is like a bonding thing.
- [135:46]
Brady
So if that's the case with you and. Yeah. And Moynahan wants to take Megan out country dancing and stuff, or.
- [135:56]
John Holmberg
I already know that's. That's over, Nick. Country dancing or otherwise. I assume that would just be charity work. I'd allow it. Country music's right out. Yeah, I'd rather just be like, oh, my God, did you go to a country show with a co worker? I know. Nothing happened. Yes, it did. Here's 10 dicks. Take these instead. Can't believe you're listening.
- [136:18]
Brady
Call me in the morning.
- [136:19]
John Holmberg
I'm going to go in your car and change out all of your stations and all your Spotify. This country music won't stand. Here. Here's more dick. Take these. You want me to take all these dicks? Yes, while I erase all the country music. It's the worst thing you could have ever done to me.
- [136:34]
Brady
How dare you?
- [136:35]
John Holmberg
How dare you take all these dicks.
- [136:37]
Dick Toledo
A countryside.
- [136:37]
John Holmberg
Take all these dicks. It's a great country.
- [136:39]
Brett
I feel betrayed.
- [136:40]
John Holmberg
And then we had a drive down to the lake, and I said, take all these dicks. Not a mistake. She drooled out her mouth and said, a country fan, to be sure. Gulp. Take all these dicks. Take all these dicks down. Biggie there. To the all these dicks. To the lake.
- [137:00]
Brett
The Nashville Gulp.
- [137:02]
John Holmberg
Yeah, doing the Nashville Gulp.
- [137:06]
Brady
That's a new line dance.
- [137:08]
John Holmberg
I looked her in the good eye and said, hey, you got a lot of drool on your head. And she had an IQ of under 82, and I knew she'd marry me if I took her to the zoo. It's the Nashville Gulp. Put it in her mouth, there's no teeth to stop you. Nashville Gulp. God, I hate country music. Your wife. Brett's right. This damn guy's nothing. Your wife likes country music. She's done. She might as well come to house and say, I'm transitioning into a retard. Dear Brady, my wife thinks my What? Fluids taste bad.
- [137:56]
Brett
Yeah.
- [137:59]
John Holmberg
I said, need more pineapple. Well, he says that, so my wife thinks my. I didn't expect that. My wife thinks my fluids taste bad. I wash with loads of different soaps and scrubs. I read up on dietary things like eating fruits and vegetables that are supposed to make my stuff taste better. I actually read somewhere that grits work. So I was eating those horrible things for a minute. Well, she had another batch last week and hated it. Said it was the worst one since. Do you guys have any tips? I know she loves doing it, but I'm. When I'm about to pop, she runs away like a stink bomb's going off. Signed Garand.
- [138:34]
Brett
You have to farm that out, Garen. What, to a professional?
- [138:38]
John Holmberg
To a lady.
- [138:39]
Brett
Yeah.
- [138:39]
John Holmberg
Who can. Who can tolerate your asparagus way.
- [138:43]
Dick Toledo
Not what I expected it there.
- [138:44]
John Holmberg
Me neither.
- [138:45]
Brady
No kidding.
- [138:47]
Brett
No, I think it's a combination. How old is she?
- [138:49]
John Holmberg
I don't know. Wait a minute.
- [138:52]
Dick Toledo
Age factors into this.
- [138:53]
John Holmberg
Oh, yeah, go ahead. This might get personal.
- [138:57]
Brett
If he's married.
- [138:58]
John Holmberg
So you think that she does. But if she's saying I'm. If she's still doing it, going, this is worse than the last one.
- [139:02]
Brett
The only thing that I've. I mean, what I know is. Or have heard is pineapple juice, pumpkin seeds for volume.
- [139:11]
John Holmberg
I'll tell you one thing right now.
- [139:14]
Brett
The Coke Zero is good.
- [139:15]
John Holmberg
Call it Diet Coke. Never had any complaints. No.
- [139:22]
Brett
Maybe get on the.
- [139:22]
John Holmberg
How about this? Why don't you taste it like Gordon Ramsay does his food before he hands it to somebody? It's hard to argue. You're trying to kill her with this garbage. What are you loading into her mouth, donkey?
- [139:37]
Brett
If you could time it where you could season it as it's coming out.
- [139:40]
John Holmberg
Right. Maybe put a rub on it. Put this on your tongue, quick.
- [139:45]
Brett
Yep.
- [139:46]
John Holmberg
That's not a bad idea, actually. Brady's first time ever seasoning sex. We have combined things that only Brady could do.
- [139:54]
Brett
What?
- [139:54]
John Holmberg
Get some of that camel sauce from the zoo from Brady's boss sauce. Pour that in her gut, use it as lube.
- [140:02]
Brett
It's healthy for.
- [140:04]
John Holmberg
Ask her what it tastes like. And if she says it's fish, pair it with something Brady's. Right. What goes well with fish? Lemon squirt a little in her mouth. Fire in some salmon. It's like, you know, grigio in with the white. Yummy. Sommelier. Yes, but you got to get on that. I'll ask Ryan at the Raha Room tonight. He's the wine expert.
- [140:26]
Brett
Maybe dip your tip into a tahin, you know, or line it like a margarita.
- [140:31]
John Holmberg
But you got to do it, like, right as you're about to go, you have to roll tahin nearby. Oh, Tap. Oh. Then you get it all in. Yeah. Dab.
- [140:38]
Brett
It in there.
- [140:39]
John Holmberg
But she needs to have it on her. You know what she needs to do? That's not as you're going, oh, yeah, here we go. She needs to go throw her lips into the tajin like a margarita.
- [140:48]
Brady
So she's rimming it.
- [140:49]
John Holmberg
Yeah, to a certain extent.
- [140:54]
Brady
It's like a margarita.
- [140:55]
John Holmberg
I don't think we want to use that phrase. Because if she's rimming it, it's going to taste worse. Yeah. Find out what it takes. Taste like, reach down there. Oh, cuttlefish. And then go online and look what goes good with cuttlefish. Probably oranges. To give her tic tac.
- [141:14]
Brett
Give her orange pineapple.
- [141:15]
John Holmberg
Brady's right. Season your junk right as it's coming out like you're a teppanyaki chef. Have something in your hand and powder that face. Have her put a jolly rancher in while she's doing it. Finally. Dear Brady, my neighbor is a daughter that's back from school. I guess my house is a two story and theirs is a two story and they're real close together. My bedroom window looks directly into hers. She's 24 or so. I know that for sure. And she is putting on a sex show in her room with her boyfriend a couple times a night. Every night. Well, the other night she saw me in the middle of their act. I forgot to turn off my bathroom light. So I was just right there in my window in full tug. There's no doubt she saw me. The guy got up and shut the blinds. So I'm like, oh no. Hadn't heard a thing. Next night I look out. Windows as wide open as it gets. And they were right back at it. Is this a green light to keep watching? Aaron, they opened up the windows again.
- [142:22]
Brett
I would say, no, it's not.
- [142:26]
John Holmberg
What is it?
- [142:27]
Brett
I tell him to.
- [142:29]
Dick Toledo
They're definitely exhibition.
- [142:30]
John Holmberg
You got a window. I've seen those houses. There's a few feet away.
- [142:35]
Brett
Another one time you got caught eight foot property lines. And then they. You would always have that blind down.
- [142:41]
John Holmberg
Always. In fact, always.
- [142:43]
Brett
Yeah.
- [142:46]
John Holmberg
I think it is. I think you just got the thumbs up.
- [142:51]
Brett
But they.
- [142:52]
Dick Toledo
They really like the sun on their.
- [142:54]
John Holmberg
Faces or the moonlight maybe.
- [142:57]
Brett
Could have been drunk.
- [142:59]
John Holmberg
Does one of them look like this? One of them look like Juggernaut and the other one's listening to Kelsey Ballerini the whole time. Because I think you just caught Dan in the act. They open the window back up and went right back at it.
- [143:13]
Brett
Still has to continue. You know, there's a couple more rounds that Happen Keeps a window that wide.
- [143:17]
John Holmberg
Open when your view is the neighbor's window.
- [143:19]
Brett
Here's what you do. If that's the case next time, then stand right at your window.
- [143:24]
John Holmberg
That's what he was doing before.
- [143:26]
Brett
I thought he was back and.
- [143:27]
John Holmberg
No, he said he was standing. The bathroom light was behind him, so it was just illuminating his dumbass.
- [143:31]
Brady
Know your surroundings, pal.
- [143:33]
John Holmberg
Yeah, there's that. Turn your lights off. Yeah, Do a little bit of, like.
- [143:38]
Dick Toledo
Be a good voyeur. Come on now.
- [143:39]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [143:43]
Brady
Doesn't tactical black teach you that? To know your surroundings?
- [143:46]
John Holmberg
Well, here again, you've got a window that looks into someone else' window. It's always closed. Otherwise, you're the weirdo.
- [143:52]
Dick Toledo
Yeah.
- [143:52]
John Holmberg
So if she's opening the window, I say, absolutely. That's 100% peek in here. It's begging to do it. If her view is your house, that window should never. It shouldn't even be there. It's only there in case there's a fire.
- [144:03]
Brett
Stand by your window again. And also put a little jug of Tahin up there so you get the response.
- [144:09]
John Holmberg
And what if it's all connected and this guy's the bad seed? You see your seed.
- [144:14]
Brady
It's not a good word.
- [144:15]
John Holmberg
If you're just tugging away at window sex across the hall there or across the alley, and you're looking in and the lady's right about to go, and then she just smashes her face in some salt right before.
- [144:26]
Dick Toledo
That's what everybody's saying. Much like Brett's mayor, you have to take a chaser after you drink that crap.
- [144:31]
John Holmberg
Salute. Oh, that garbage. You got that? Yeah. Mayor Poop wine. I don't know what that stuff is. Yuck. All right, well, there you go. Interesting. A lot of your interesting problems that people. Somebody's telling me Slurpees. Get it done. You get. Drink a Slurpees. He'll taste great. A guy named Nicholas. Slurpees are a good one.
- [144:56]
Brady
Slurpees make it taste better.
- [144:58]
Dick Toledo
Is there a certain flavor?
- [145:00]
Brett
Get one of those. Shaq XL Shackalicious.
- [145:03]
John Holmberg
A pizza.
- [145:04]
Dick Toledo
What?
- [145:05]
Brett
His new Slurpee he's got.
- [145:06]
John Holmberg
It's also.
- [145:09]
Brett
Pineapple.
- [145:10]
Dick Toledo
Okay, he already said pineapple doesn't work for him.
- [145:13]
John Holmberg
Another email says, by the way, guys, you're missing a point. Point here. Dan lifts weights, listens to country music, and his country dancing. That's a homosexual. Let this twink take your wife to the concert. He's doing you a favor. There's truth to that, too. Anyway, good luck out there with all of that. Don't forget to keep that little sponge and the salt next to the bed just in case you're taking shots. Maybe you light it on fire like that. Sambu. It's the only way to drink that. Can you imagine if your stuff tasted like. Maybe you got to go down there and test. See if you taste like black licorice and everybody's got something. Because I like the taste of cilantro. But the people who don't absolutely hate it. You might produce cilantro flavored stuff. Some girl out there will love it, some won't. Your touch sickens her. It's all right. That's true of most. Most of us. There you go. That is what Brady did. It's out of control now. We're gonna end early today.
- [146:30]
Brady
What?
- [146:31]
John Holmberg
Yeah, that's how well timed this was. Great job, boys. Never happens and never happens.
- [146:37]
Brady
What happened?
- [146:38]
John Holmberg
I don't know. Doesn't seem right. But it happened. It's time now for the entertainment drill. It's brought to you by our friends@reactdefense.com the home of tactical black self defense training. Get yourself in great shape. Learn how to fight off the weirdos that I ended up almost having to fight Friday night. Looney meth head chose me out of everybody just because I was standing still to start a crazy conversation about a woman named Sarah who was going to take and eat my organs. I kept a foot distance away. Not one foot, my leg. A kicking foot away. Had he taken one more step, I'd have known what to do. I was also my fault. Kind of stupidly placed in a bit of a corner up against a post. I was like, I'm doing everything I shouldn't have done. Men. And I looked up from my phone, another thing that was dumb. I got this nut bag and here's another thing I was doing that was dumb. Filming the nut because he was kind of funny walking down the street towards me. But when he got closer, close, it was business time. And I had three or four things ready to go. I didn't expect him to be that close to me. So once he got real close, I had my eye on him the whole time though. I knew this could go sideways. Zombies. They're out there, man. They're out there. You never know. It almost went a little sideways on me. I wasn't too concerned. But you never know what he's got. You never know what he's thinking. You never know if it hurts. You just have to have a plan. The second oh happens to you, it happened. Luckily, I Kind of think I revealed myself as someone that wasn't that worried about it and had my brain around it. I didn't act scared. I didn't invite him in. There were people, like giving them stuff. You're out of your mind. It's out there. The weirdness happens. It could happen at any time. And if you're not prepared, it can go real bad real fast. So they can teach you that real quick. Become a sheepdog. Stop being a sheep. For when this kind of weirdness comes your direction, you can do it for a price. That is unbelievable. 199 bucks for two months personal training right there. Hands on from the best in the world. Reactdefense.com it's the home tactical Black Brady Entertainment.
- [148:39]
Brett
Joe Gatto from the Practical Jokers.
- [148:43]
John Holmberg
Yeah.
- [148:43]
Brett
Is being accused of sexual misconduct from two women. Last Thursday, a woman went on tick tock and accused Joe of sexually assaulting her back in 2023 when she was 19. She claims the incident occurred after Joe and his wife Bessie were. Had reconciled following a separation.
- [149:04]
John Holmberg
So separated, got back together and then he boned that girl.
- [149:07]
Brett
Joe denied the assault claim. He said I might. He might not be denying something happened. He said, I've used poor judgment as a result of. I violated trust of the people that I love most.
- [149:21]
John Holmberg
So that's what. Because I read the thing. I read the. That.
- [149:23]
Brett
Yeah.
- [149:24]
John Holmberg
That said that she. She had accused him of sexual assault. I read that part. And then his excuse was I've made bad judgment. I didn't see the part about him reconciling with his wife and then doing that. So he's fighting his home battle in the media when he should have just said it's not sexual assault and then dealt with the wife thing.
- [149:42]
Brett
Yeah.
- [149:42]
John Holmberg
At home. That's not going to go well, by the way. That's going to go poorly.
- [149:45]
Brett
Says working on myself is an ongoing process and I'm oh now going to take some time away from the public eye to focus my energies where I need Guilty.
- [149:55]
John Holmberg
Yeah. But it's guilty of. With his w. He just adjudicated his home life.
- [150:00]
Brett
Yeah.
- [150:01]
John Holmberg
On a sexual assault charge. He made it seem like he did it now because he's so guilty with his wife. He should. He's turning to his wife going, I need to change. I need to be a better man. But what he's saying to the general public is, I did this instead of just coming out. All we need to know is did you do it or not? If we're. I didn't sexually assault any. Anybody. I Got trouble at home, though. Public apology to the wife is worse.
- [150:26]
Brett
The second one came forward saying she worked with Joe for two years and during that time he'd inappropriately grab her, asked her for back massages, asked her about her sex life, and if she rejected his advances or refused to flirt back, he would be rude to her at work.
- [150:48]
John Holmberg
Oh, get over it. Yeah, that's some of that salt.
- [150:52]
Brett
He left impractical jokers in 2022 because of all to work on some undisclosed issues in his personal life.
- [150:59]
John Holmberg
Right. His wife and him were battling. That's too much about his home life out in public to make it seem like these sexual assaults didn't happen. You charged me with sexual assault. I don't start apologizing to home. Oh, my God, no, I need to be a better man. I'm going to take some time away. It's like, did you sexually assault that lady? Why are you so upset? Oh, my wife's gonna be angry. Like when Letterman. I'll never forget his apology when that lady blackmailed him or that guy blackmailed him for banging staff member. Yeah, it was a lady that worked for him. And he had just had that kid with his wife and he just said, I didn't do this. Just let you know. So they were blackmailing me. What I did do was have an inappropriate relationship with somebody at work. I got trouble at home. This I'm not worried about. I was basically like, I gotta. I gotta redeem myself with you guys. That's fine. I got trouble at home. He told the whole story and it was like. And it ain't easy being at home. He and Jay Z had a interview together about. And Dave just brought it up because you and I have something in common. We both got caught doing stuff we shouldn't have done. And then, you know, they went through the thing, but you could tell it was. Was Dave's situation was brutal. This guy screwed up. You got to take that lesson from your lawyers and just shut up.
- [152:16]
Brett
Denzel Washington doesn't consider himself a Hollywood actor. He says, I'm from Mount Vernon, so I'm a Mount Vernon actor. Because I don't know what Hollywood means. He also knows that he was a stage actor first, because right now, he and Jake Gyllenhaal doing some Broadway. They're doing. Doing what is Othello. And it's killing it, crushing it. That recently broke a Broadway record for single week box office gross.
- [152:48]
John Holmberg
They're killing it. It's the number one Broadway show of all time now. It's crazy.
- [152:53]
Brett
That's amazing. Elton John has some advice for you up and coming musicians. He says skip the shows like American Idol and just go out there and gig.
- [153:07]
John Holmberg
Yeah. Who will hire you though? No bars.
- [153:10]
Brett
Because his point is American Idol and the other two don't teach you how to be an entertainer.
- [153:17]
John Holmberg
You know, take your money.
- [153:18]
Brett
Yeah.
- [153:18]
John Holmberg
They want to find somebody that'll sing their song and make money. Anything else? Quick? Nope. Nope. That's it. You're done. You're done. You're done, pal. All right, that's it for us. Larry's coming up next. We end on time today. How about that? That Larry's good to you. You be good to him. He'll give you stuff. That's how that works. Even Kelsey Ballerini Tickets for Dan Dan the dancing man. It's 98 Kup. We'll see you guys tomorrow right here in the morning sickness. It's out of control now. 98K.