03-25-25 - Why Do We Have The AZ Falls On The Canal - Jerome Man Busted Filming Elementary Schoolgirls And Trying To Nab One Reminds To Keep Eyes On The Weirdos

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode: March 25, 2025
Title: Why Do We Have The AZ Falls On The Canal - Jerome Man Busted Filming Elementary Schoolgirls And Trying To Nab One Reminds To Keep Eyes On The Weirdos
Host: John Holmberg with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Release Date: March 25, 2025

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Exploring Arizona Falls on the Canal

The episode kicks off with John Holmberg leading a conversation about Arizona Falls, a mechanical waterfall project located near 56th Street in Phoenix. Holmberg shares his personal experiences biking along the canal, expressing both fascination and frustration with the attraction's design.

John Holmberg [02:10]: "It's like a lock. Yeah, for flatboats back in the pioneer days."

Holmberg critiques the engineering behind Arizona Falls, questioning its status as a tourist attraction. He observes the consistent presence of Asian families enjoying the site, attributing it to increased visibility from Shohei Ohtani's popularity during spring training seasons.

John Holmberg [01:15]: "Asian families are there, like, loads of them. So it's on. It's. I don't know what's on."

The hosts discuss the aesthetic and functional aspects of the falls, noting its utilitarian appearance and lack of true marvel despite being promoted as an engineering feat.

John Holmberg [04:14]: "I think the canal itself is more of a marvel than this thing."

Their conversation delves into the contrast between the intended appeal of Arizona Falls and the reality experienced by visitors, highlighting a sense of disappointment when the attraction fails to live up to expectations.

Local Crime Spotlight: Jerome Man Arrested

Shifting gears, the podcast addresses a disturbing local crime involving a man from Jerome who was apprehended for filming elementary school girls in a restroom and attempting to abduct one. Holmberg and co-host Bret Vesely provide a detailed account of the incident, emphasizing the importance of community vigilance in small towns.

John Holmberg [07:34]: "He was in there. He was in there. And then he busts out and he tries to nab one of the girls and they, you know, they have him on film running away."

Holmberg expresses strong disapproval of the perpetrator's actions, stating there is no room for rehabilitation in such cases.

John Holmberg [08:47]: "I'll burn him up. There's no coming back from this again. You don't get rehabbed from that, I don't think."

The hosts discuss the dynamics of small-town communities, where suspicion often falls quickly on known individuals, highlighting both the benefits and drawbacks of such tight-knit environments.

John Holmberg [06:58]: "You know who the weirdos are. So when somebody reports something, there's always one guy going, we know he. That guy did it."

Controversial Commentary and Dark Humor

In a controversial and unsettling segment, Holmberg uses dark humor to address the crime by sarcastically offering to perform the very acts committed by the perpetrator. This monologue serves as a satirical critique of invasive and criminal behavior, though it treads a fine line in terms of sensitivity.

John Holmberg [07:45]: "If there's anybody out there who wants that, don't risk jail time. I'll do it. Send me some money, and I'll poop and pee in a bathroom for you if that's what gets you going."

Holmberg continues this narrative, exaggerating his willingness to fulfill perverse requests in an attempt to lampoon the absurdity and depravity of such actions.

John Holmberg [10:58]: "I'll do it for you. Celebrity impressions. Taking dumps for the perverts out there. If it keeps you away from the kids, what a service I'd provide."

While this segment may be intended as dark humor, it elicits mixed reactions due to its sensitive nature surrounding the discussed crime.

Community Reflection and Safety Concerns

Towards the end of the episode, Holmberg reiterates the importance of community awareness and proactive measures to prevent such incidents. He urges listeners to remain vigilant and support local authorities in maintaining safety.

John Holmberg [14:15]: "Just stop filming people. That's all I'm asking."

The discussion underscores the necessity of collective responsibility in safeguarding vulnerable populations, particularly in educational settings.

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Key Takeaways

• Arizona Falls Critique: The hosts express skepticism about the engineering and appeal of Arizona Falls, questioning its effectiveness as a tourist attraction despite its intended design.

• Local Crime Awareness: A detailed account of a man from Jerome arrested for inappropriate and criminal behavior against elementary school girls highlights the challenges small communities face in identifying and apprehending perpetrators.

• Dark Humor and Commentary: Holmberg employs dark humor to critique invasive and criminal actions, though this approach may be controversial and sensitive given the nature of the crime discussed.

• Community Vigilance: Emphasizes the importance of being aware of "weirdos" in the community and the role of residents in supporting law enforcement to prevent and address such incidents.

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Notable Quotes

• John Holmberg [02:10]: "It's like a lock. Yeah, for flatboats back in the pioneer days."

• John Holmberg [04:14]: "I think the canal itself is more of a marvel than this thing."

• John Holmberg [07:34]: "He was in there. He was in there. And then he busts out and he tries to nab one of the girls and they, you know, they have him on film running away."

• John Holmberg [08:47]: "I'll burn him up. There's no coming back from this again. You don't get rehabbed from that, I don't think."

• John Holmberg [07:45]: "If there's anybody out there who wants that, don't risk jail time. I'll do it. Send me some money, and I'll poop and pee in a bathroom for you if that's what gets you going."

• John Holmberg [14:15]: "Just stop filming people. That's all I'm asking."

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Note: This episode contains sensitive and potentially distressing content. Listener discretion is advised.

Transcript

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[John Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by mmpguns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. All right, it's God smack. Everybody floating through. Just found a body in the canal. I was watching the news update. Brett, was the last time you were on 32nd street and Roosevelt or actually Indian Trail and Garland? Yeah, it's 32nd street in Roosevelt. Don't remember. I don't know what you're talking about. I haven't been anywhere near there. So the body was beyond resuscitative. What happens? Yeah, it'll happen. It's kind of hot outside. People want to cool off.

[Brett]

No carpet.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there's no. There's just the body floating by. I. You know what's weird? I ride that canal sometime. I did it Sunday. And I ride all the way down that canal and I am gonna find one. Is I. You want to. That's the difference. I'm dying to find a body in the canal. And I don't know why I look in there. I stare down at that like that's all there is to do. Like I can't help it. Keep riding and I ride you. I would. I would. Immediately. It was like. It's like an Easter keg. No, I'd be thrilled. No, keep riding. No way. 23andMe doesn't have my DNA. I can't get blamed for it, but I would definitely point it out. And especially when I ride by the Arizona falls, which, by the way, is a tourist attraction, if you don't know about it. On Indian school thereabouts about 56th street, maybe a little further over, there's the canal. And they built this contraption to make a little waterfall.

[Brett]

It's like a lock. Yeah, for flatboats back in the pioneer days.

[John Holmberg]

It looks mechanical and almost, you know, utilitarian. And you ride by and the last few Times I've gone by there, I've noticed that. And this is how you know it's a tourist attraction. Asian families are there, like, loads of them. So it's on. It's. I don't know what's on. And we're in spring and spring training and all that. And Shohei Ohtani has definitely boosted the Asian population. I was at a Dodgers game. I'm like, my God, flying all the way over here. And when that dude leaves, they all leave. Have you been to a Dodger game in spring? Not yet. Not when Shohei's done. He's been there. It's it. All the Asians leave. They're there for that. They would see sh. And the other guy, Yakimato or whatever, the pitcher that's. But he starts and he. In spring, he's not going to play much. Shohei got his bag and they'll do that in spring. And he just walks off the field out there at the park and. Was it Glendale? Yeah. And I mean, it was. It was like he told them all to rise. It was like white walkers, only yellow walkers, they just all got up and left with them. Like, I think they'll have the same plane to catch at. Shohei leaves, the Dodgers don't matter. It was amazing to watch anyway. But I'm by these Arizona Falls and I'm riding my bike by, and I see like, a family of three small kids and the two adults, and they're walking up. Cameras, phones, all that. So somewhere out there on some list of things to do in Phoenix, standing by this weird canal waterfall project is something. And let me tell you right now, engineering marvel it ain't. I don't think it is. I'm an idiot. And I think I might figure that out. I think I'm stupid. And if you gave me enough time, I could draw what that is and make the same exact thing happen. I don't know if it's. I don't know what they're doing with it, but it's. Now people show up and they walk around on it, take pictures, and I'm like, this looks like a water treatment plant to me. This doesn't look. We tried years ago to do a barrel down that thing. Like, see if I could ride in it and then do a barrel like a waterfall because they made such a big deal out of it being the Arizona Falls. And then when you see it, you're like, it might be 22ft if that from top to by. And you stop once. It's like layered, like stairs that's okay.

[Brett]

You still see the falls at all at Tempe Town? Lakers that completely blacked. It used to be, you know, they put the bladder in there.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. No, they don't. When it rolls over the edge. Yeah. That's only for, like, runoff. Yeah. That's not actually a falls. This is legitimate. This is like on purpose. And so what a disappointment that would be to come all the way out here and go, oh, I understand. This is a tourist attraction. Then you go there and you're like, this sucks.

[Brett]

The natives made this.

[John Holmberg]

No, they didn't. And they got like pictures of it and explanations. And I think the canal itself is more of a marvel than this thing. And then on the other side of it, I think it is 60 something street on the other side, there's always a couple of guys just fishing in chairs. It takes away any mystique that that may have it. But I always look for dead bodies and they bunch up. That's where I look most, Brett, is where the. The grates are, where the canal leads to. Then you see all the trash. I'm like, man, one of these days. But I'm. I look for it. They found it. Got one in there this morning. 30, 32nd street in Roosevelt. 13 Street, Roseville. I wouldn't ride that canal. That's the. That's the Grand Canal that's down south that leads you to. And then when you have that one tunnel you come out of on the canal up by, it's. It ends up going past Metro Center. Metro, but before that along the blade, everything's just fine. And then you go through one tunnel and everything smells like Mexican food and strange stuff and all the signs are different. And it's one street. You go under a street into a little tunnel and come out and it's like you're on Hatcher and 7th street and the whole world's different.

[Brett]

Next thing you know, you're Snake Plissken.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's. You've gone back in time. You're in a different country for a second. One of these days, as often as I ride that bike, one of these days I'll be lucky enough to. To be with Troy Hayden and talking about that. Troy's a good dude. I went to the Suns game with him last night. We had a lot of fun. Channel 12's Troy Hayden. Now I've got TVs Troy Hayden and TVs Doug Hopkins. I need more TVs, people. It's good. We'll send past more your way. No, that's Right, we'll skip that one. Also, there's a guy who just got over. This is a good story. And I don't want to put shame on him. He could be one of the shame people. But it's in Jerome and Clarkdale. They caught this dude. They finally had him. They've had him on film. And they, you know, that's a good thing about living in a small town. You know who the weirdos are. So when somebody reports something, there's always one guy going, we know he. That guy did it. Like, you immediately have a suspect. You're just waiting for the event. You have suspects before the bad news.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Because you're like, this is a small town. That guy's gonna. If anything bad happens, he did it. Or at least question him. Well, they had that. So a guy was filming girls in a elementary school restroom. And then it got too much for him, so he tried to nab one. And then they lost their minds and stuff and so we ran off. They had video and they finally. They got the suspect, but he was filming them in the restroom. And on the heels of another story the day before where they found cameras in some insurance agents bathroom in like Grand Rapids or something. I don't know. I. I don't understand.

[Brett]

It sounds like the guy was in the bathroom filming.

[John Holmberg]

He was. He was in there. And then he busts out and he tries to nab one of the girls and they, you know, they have him on film running away.

[Brett]

That was Ted.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Somebody was filming their girls at the. Oh, yeah, we know who that is. That's the. Every small town has like a sling blade. That's the guy. But he was at Clarkdale Jerome School, which serves children in kindergarten through the eighth grade. And he was reported by a witness to have been filming inside the girls restroom just outside the soccer field. A group of girls entered the room. He grabbed one of them by the arm and tried to get him. She was able to get away, and then he just took off. He scaled the fence and ran away into the woods. And then they said they. They were kept inside until the end of the day, waiting. And then they finally nabbed the guy. Monday. Evening sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible. Morning sickness. It just. I don't get that. I don't. I don't understand. I'll never understand. I mean, that dude's just bad all the way around. Burn him up. There's no coming back from this again. You don't get rehabbed from that, I don't think. I don't Think you can come out of that better someday? You just don't.

[Brett]

You know what? I'm not gonna do it anymore.

[John Holmberg]

Right. No redemption. Thank God that I don't. Yeah. No redemption. Yeah. That was a phase I was going through. No redemption for that. But the cameras in the bathroom. Look, if there's anybody out there who wants that, don't risk jail time. I'll do it. Send me some money, and I'll poop and pee in a bathroom for you if that's what gets you going.

[Brett]

Look at that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I don't know why you'd want to see that. I don't know why that's even something you'd risk. Is it the risk? Is it the act? I know girls in the bathroom have had to deal with this forever with, you know, dudes hanging cameras into the vents or putting them over the top of the thing to film you pee. I don't get it. I'll do it for you. In fact, email me and say, hey, I like that. Dress up like a woman. I'll do that, too. I'll put Asian stuff on if you want to go that way. I'll take my eyes down. I'll. I'll even do other races just to keep you. Yeah, because I'm a man of the people, Brett. I don't want this guy. I don't want a guy to have to sneak around in the shadows watching people pee and then have those poor people have to deal with it. I'll volunteer. Unlike Jesus, I'll volunteer and take the. And take this burden on, because I poop and pee all the time. And if I can make a couple bucks doing it, and there's some perverts out there, go, all right. Dress up like Winona Ryder and take a leak. I'm like, okay.

[Brett]

I get paid.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah. For dumps. I'll even pretend. Make all the right noises. Oh, I just. Yeah. I don't understand why you would. I. Cameras and bathrooms don't make sense to me. I don't find any of that sexy, but don't risk it. Email me [e-mail] I'll do it for you. It's gross. It's not gonna be fun, but to me, evidently, you get the best out of it. But if you're a weirdo and you're thinking about putting cameras in a bathroom, leave it to me. I'll put one in my office so it's even weirder. I'll forget. And I'll give you a direct line. You just get in there. You pay me a fee for. And you watch me occasionally. Poop and pee and Farmer's Blow. Like, that's what I do in there.

[Brett]

You just set up your only fans.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I suppose that opens it up to too many. This one. Would you dress up like alf? Yes, I'll do whatever. Now, you're gonna provide the costumes, though. Like, if you want me to dress up like alf, I'm not gonna go out and spend money on an ALF costume just for one hit. That's expensive. And if that's what you need, then I'm gonna need a couple grand out of this. I'll get the good movie quality alf. I'm not going down with the Plastics. I'll have a movie quality ALF costume. I'll wander into the bathroom. Hey, Willy. And then I'll pee all over the place. And then you'll be like, oh, that's my dream. And weirdo, I'll do that for you. I don't understand it. We gotta put a stop to it. There has to be people like me who don't care about that stuff, who are willing to, you know, be the Jesus of this and keep these people away from normals. Dress up like Gary Coleman and going, okay, I'll do it. Just don't say my name. And when you're. And you're not going to show anybody this video, it would be even. It would be even funnier years from now. Former radio personality for no reason at all, caught on hidden camera in blackface, pooping. Like, why would I do that? I'd click on that. I click on that, too. John Holmberg, formerly of cupd, was in blackface taking a poop and saying, what you talking about, Willis? I'll do it. I have no issue with that. That doesn't bother me. If you want to watch me pee, you're the weirdo. Completely strange person. And I'll have a little costume and I'll put on costumes and walk around.

[Brett]

Have you seen OJ on the toilet yet? It's unbelievable.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna name that one Nicole. And this one here's Ron. Anyway, that's all I'm talking about. I'm just saying. And then some guy at home just whacking off to me being OJ Pooping. I'll do it. Celebrity impressions. Taking dumps for the perverts out there. If it keeps you away from the kids, what a service I'd provide. And another, like, you know, if you knew a guy's like, I gotta get these cameras into that girl's. Bathroom. It's like. No, no, no. You don't have to do that anymore. Holmberg will do it for you. I don't have much money. He's not charging a ton. If you need a costume, you gotta buy him a costume. Throw in a tip. I'll work for tips. I'm like a guy who does piano at a lounge. I just don't. Ralph the dog from Muppet Movie. I'll dress up as Ralph the dog. There you go. Scoot around on the floor. I'll. Whatever. This has to end. We get. How many times a year do you hear the cameras in the bathroom stories? Too many. We need a guy. I'll be that guy. This one says you actually poop at work. I thought you didn't because you need a shower to clean up. I will not poop at work. I'll pretend I don't poop anywhere but at home. So I'd have to set up cameras there, too. And I would just get a bedroom there. And then I got to take a shower immediately after because that's what a decent human being does, so. Yeah, but at work, I'll set up.

[Brett]

Liam Neeson.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Quit. Quit making. I'm going to do something. A very specialized set of skills. Poo. Poo and pee pee for you. I don't know who you are, and I don't know what you want.

[Brett]

Milk. Milk?

[John Holmberg]

You think you do that? I'm Liam Neeson. And milk, milk, lemonade and the corner fudge is mad. Oh, a crap has been taken. Yeah, I'll do all that for you. Be like, ha, ha ha. There's this guy who does this stuff over there, and I'll have to get Annie, my makeup lady for TV and all that, and I'll have her do stuff, so just stop it. If you want to put cameras in a bathroom. Stop it. Just stop it. And now this guy do Donald Trump pooping and talking about how it's the best poop ever. Okay, you do request now. Yeah, well, that's what I'm saying. I'm telling you, this is a. There's an industry in this. You got to pay up, though, first, pal. I mean, we're not just giving for nothing. One of the greatest craps of all time. Surprise. I would think I'd really like this. Would it come out a little? It's like. It's a hammerhead.

[Brett]

I love steam.

[John Holmberg]

This one's very hot. Very hot. I like to. You know what I like to do, Brady? I'll talk to you while I'M doing it, Brady. Well, I'm in here. I like that. I like to put ice in the water. Yeah, I really like to ice the water down. I like to get in there and ice it up. And then when the turd hits, steam. Really? A big one today. That's one of the greater ones. That's. I call that one Putin because I own it. I'll do this for you. A presidential dump. Yeah. I just don't understand. It'll be even better. It's gonna go full circle the day Brett comes across a video. View for Brett's videos. Oh, man. It's some Jew, some jerk pooping, dressed up as Trump. The big presidential throne and the king on the throne. That's nice. Anyway, just stop filming people. That's all I'm asking. And in Clarkdale, Jerome, if you're up there filming kids, they knew you were gonna do something bad to begin with. You weren't normal in that community in the first place. If you're the weirdo and show low. Or if you're the weirdo in Payson. How bad does that have to get? Oh, they're all nuts. There you go. Stop it. If you need somebody to watch poop, I'm your guy. It's 98. It's out of control now. 98. Okay, you go, PD.