03-26-25 - Rock Wars - Song The Tells You You're At A Swingers Party

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: Rock Wars - Song That Tells You You're At A Swingers Party
Release Date: March 26, 2025

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Overview

In this engaging episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness on Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, host John Holmberg teams up with co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo to dive into the quirky and often misunderstood world of swinger parties. Titled "Rock Wars - Song That Tells You You're At A Swingers Party," the episode centers around the challenge of identifying a universal song that unmistakably signals attendees that a swinger party is underway.

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Key Discussions

1. Brady's Personal Anecdote and Introduction to the Topic [00:47 - 02:07]

   The episode kicks off with Brady Bogen sharing a personal story about his childhood behavior, highlighting how plausible acting went unnoticed:

   Brady [00:55]: "I thought I was a cute kid, but evidently I could go full R word like seconds and no one questioned it."

   Transitioning from his anecdote, Brady introduces the main topic of swinger parties:

   Brady [02:04]: "Everybody said, oh, here's how, you know, there's purple lights, there's half a garage door open... We need a universal song to let everybody know, like, the minute it plays, like, okay, we're at a swingers party."

2. Defining the Problem and the Need for a Universal Song [02:07 - 05:00]

   The hosts discuss the confusion and plethora of unstandardized signs that signal a swinger party, emphasizing the need for a singular, unmistakable musical cue. Brady elaborates on the current inconsistent indicators:

   Brady [03:01]: "There's too many rules... We need a theme song to let the festivities begin."

   This sets the stage for a collaborative brainstorming session to find the perfect song.

3. Brainstorming Song Options and Rock Wars Competition [05:00 - 09:17]

   The core of the episode revolves around the "Rock Wars" competition, where hosts pitch their suggested songs. The objective is to find a track that instantly notifies attendees of the swinger party's true nature. Notable suggestions include:

   • John's Suggestion: "Steve Miller's Swing Town" [05:36]

     John [05:44]: "Transitioning from cocktails to it's go time."

     However, Brady dismisses this choice, seeking something more explicit.

   • Brady's Initial Thought: "O.P.P." by Ice T [05:54]

     Brady [05:57]: "I had O.P.P. I wrote down O.P.P. for Brady."

     The group finds this option less fitting for the intended purpose.

   • Brett's (presumably Bret Vesely) Suggestion: "Let's Get Butt Naked" by Ice T [07:02]

     Brett [07:10]: "Let's get butt Naked."

     This track is considered more direct but still requires editing for appropriateness.

   • Final Choice: "Ladies and Gentlemen" by Saliva [07:52]

     Brady [07:24]: "Saliva, ladies and gentlemen... It tells you, yes, this is what's happening now."

     The hosts converge on this choice, appreciating its clarity and effectiveness in signaling the party's nature.

   The competition culminates with Brady declaring Saliva's track as the winner:

   Brady [09:14]: "This is for you swingers to announce to all us normal people to get out."

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Concluding Insights

The episode wraps up with the hosts reflecting on the importance of having clear signals in social settings to avoid misunderstandings. By selecting a universal song, they aim to streamline the experience for both swinger party attendees and outsiders, reducing the reliance on ambiguous indicators like purple lights or pineapples.

Holmberg [09:17]: "This is out of control now. 98 KUPD a win again."

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Takeaways

• Unified Communication: The quest for a universal song underscores the need for clear and direct communication in social gatherings to prevent confusion and ensure comfort for all participants.

• Creativity in Problem-Solving: The collaborative "Rock Wars" format showcases the hosts' creative approach to addressing niche challenges, making the discussion both entertaining and insightful.

• Community Engagement: By inviting listeners to contribute song suggestions via text or email, the show fosters a sense of community involvement and shared decision-making.

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For those interested in more lively debates and humor-filled discussions, tune in to Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD (97.9 FM) or visit www.98kupd.com weekdays from 5:30 AM to 10:00 AM.

Transcript

[Holmberg]

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[Dick Toledo]

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[Brady]

We got the rock wars coming up. I'm fast with this because it's a quick one. We're late. My fault. So the topic I want to go with this week, a lot of swinger talk on this deal. Lot of swinger talk. And nobody actually has given any positive, by the way, before we get into that, a guy emailed and said, it doesn't bother you that when you were a kid and pretending to be handicapped, no one ever stopped it. And I always thought in my head that was just good acting. But I had to look. Nobody questioned it.

[John]

That's you can't half ass that.

[Brady]

You gotta go on. I didn't. But also like it was believable. And I had no makeup or anything. They just looked at me and said, probably I didn't do, you know, it didn't take much. And that ugly little kid's got a disease too. How about that Kind of changed my world right there. Guy named William added that and I'm like, yeah, it's true. I never really thought it. I just thought I was just really kind of, you know, it's kind of the Ricky Schroeder of my time. Although he was kind of the Ricky Schroeder of my time.

[John]

You're entertaining your mom too.

[Brady]

It was a great child act. No one ever said, nothing's wrong with him. They just said, yeah, that. That looks about right.

[Holmberg]

How bad is that?

[Brady]

Yeah, I thought I was a cute kid, but evidently I could go full R word like seconds and no one questioned it.

[Holmberg]

Did your dad make you do it too? Or just Mom?

[Brady]

No, dad was real quick to leave me in the car. He had no issue if he had to run in somewhere. I was sitting in the car. He trusted me he didn't do the handicapped parking thing. Although, yeah, he did. Back then. There was a lot less. There was. It was a lot more lax. We lived in a small town. I mean, the handicapped guy that lived there, if he wasn't out, we could park in his spot. Anyway, different story with the swinger stuff. Everybody said, oh, here's how, you know, there's, you know, purple lights, there's half a garage door open. There's stacked rocks, pineapples upside down, black rings, all this. I'm like, you guys have too many rules. That's everybody you just named off. Possibly everyone. So let's say we're going to a party this weekend and no one's announced it. We need a song to let everybody know, like, the minute it plays. Like, okay, we're at a swingers party. They just announced it. That means either you stay or you go. And it needs to be universal. So I want a song.

[John]

It's, like, for, like a diddy party.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, the diddy party is about to begin. You know, when they do the thing when you're, you know, transition. Yeah. You're having cordials, and all of a sudden there's this. This. And then, like, music to let you know the play's about to begin. That's it for swingers. You can have the party. I'm at Brady's house, and everything's cool. They were having fun. He's at your neighbor Laser. And there's Kenny and the whole gang. Hey, Tom's here. Your brother. And we're all dancing, having a good time. And then this song starts, and it's like, okay, intermission is over. The real party begins now. And it becomes the universal theme. There's too many things with all the swinger talk we've had since Monday, or even swingers say, here's what I do. And it's different. It's. We need to universe. We need to consolidate this. So a theme song to let the festivities begin. And that way I'll know to get the absolute out of their friendly fires about to happen everywhere. So you can help us out. Holmerget98kupd.com Give us a song. You can text 97936. You can call 585-9800. You tell us your suggestions. We'll have Rock wars coming up next. Morning sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible. Holmberg's Morning Sickness. It's time for the weekly battle of musical supremacy known only as Rock Wars Bratia by our friends at Mo Money Pond. Short or long term collateral loans. $10 to up to $100,000 or more. No credit needed. Top dollar paid. The entire process just taking several minutes. Mo Money, pawn.com. 12th street and Indian school. See you there. I'm heading over there later today to pick up my Troy Palomalu autograph. Jersey Byron text me yesterday. He was getting kind of lonely and it's got a sold sign on. I'm like, damn it, I haven't picked it up. And he said, a guy walked by the other day and said, does this it is sold? And he's like, yeah. And he goes, did Homeberg buy it? Yes, I did.

[Holmberg]

Your reputation procedure.

[Brady]

Yes, I did.

[John]

Hands off.

[Brady]

Hands off. Metroid Palomali. It is time for the rock wars. This week, it is the. The subject of swinging. A song where you're at a party. We're having a good time. And then the announcement to the crowd goers with the universal song will become after this, the song that makes everybody go up. The swinging's about to begin. So the folks who don't want to. You can go down here. The white party begins upstairs right now. And it's a universal thing. Enough with the pineapples. Enough with the stacked rocks and all the purple nonsense and the silliness. This is how it works. Brady, I'd like you to go first.

[John]

All right. It's the first song that came to my mind, and it's a perfect song for a transition. Like you said, going from the trans people.

[Brady]

What? What?

[John]

Transitioning from, you know, cocktails to. It's go time.

[Brady]

Right.

[John]

Steve Miller's Swing Town.

[Brady]

No, that is not.

[Holmberg]

That is not what I was thinking.

[Brady]

I had O.P.P. i wrote down O.P.P. for Brady.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, I was.

[John]

Everyone's heading the swing tag.

[Brady]

All right. Yeah. Okay. I like this. It's not the most modern swinging party I want to be a part of. There's a lot of. A lot of people in their 60s there.

[John]

Well, if you're looking for.

[Brady]

Well, I know if you're looking for age appropriate swinging, you go nuts. I. I prefer my swingers to be menstruating. Wow. But not active. Not actively. Not actively. I don't like the ones that don't have to. Yeah, no, no. Yeah.

[Holmberg]

The valley swing town or drag family.

[Brady]

And they get to deal with it.

[John]

Comes a swinger.

[Brady]

I know Tom swings. He's asked a couple of times. Brady's brother's here.

[Dick Toledo]

You keep denying.

[Brady]

Yeah, I just don't like postmenopausal swing parties. That just sounds gross to me.

[Holmberg]

Decent Band name.

[Brady]

It's too long. Good album name. Post Menopausal Swing Party. Great album name. I don't know what the band's called yet, but that's a good one. Brett, you go.

[Holmberg]

Well, you know, if I'm going to a swinger party, I. I definitely want to know if. When I need to bounce. I mean, I get. I mean, I don't want. I don't want any innuendos. I want it just thrown right in my face.

[Brady]

What?

[Holmberg]

So Ice T basically had a song called let's Get Butt Naked and.

[Byron]

Drive me crazy with this.

[Brady]

All right, is this edited?

[Byron]

Let's get butt Naked. And trying to make this real clear.

[Brady]

Oh, geez. I heard it.

[Byron]

Remove your. I just want to get near. Close.

[Brady]

All right. I want to get upside down. Right. All right, that's not bad. Because we don't hear that at parties too often. So it would definitely bring the attention.

[Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And people like, why is this playing? It's like, because stuff's about to be.

[Holmberg]

The chorus just tells you.

[Brady]

I mean, time to go.

[John]

Chorus.

[Brady]

Yeah. Let's get fuck naked. And this pretty much.

[Holmberg]

Pretty much it tells you. Yeah, this is what's happening now.

[Brady]

You'll have some fun. People going, that's hilarious. Like, no, they mean it. Oh, yeah, we gotta go. Get out. And then people like me who'd be like, see?

[Dick Toledo]

Yep.

[Holmberg]

Doesn't sound so bad to see where this goes.

[Brady]

Nobody here has been through menopause yet. This is. This is interesting. Mine lyrically is an announcement to the crowd, which I think is the best part. Just basically says, ladies and gentlemen, please would you bring your attention to me for a feast for your eyes to see. An explosion of catastrophe like nothing you've ever seen before. Saliva. Ladies and gentlemen.

[John]

Ladies and gentlemen, please.

[Brady]

You're like, oh, like having a ring master. The best part. Do you want it? Do you need it? Let me hear it. Ladies and gentlemen, Boom, boom, boom, right here today. John Gordon. Your choices. Swing Town for Brady's Post Hip Surgery Party by Steve Miller. Is it the late Steve Miller yet? It's got to be.

[John]

No, he's still on.

[Holmberg]

And the worst part is he was the first one in, too. He's like, I got this.

[Brady]

That was second. Got to get down to Swing Town. Brett chose let's Get Butt Naked and Do that Thing by Ice T. And I chose, ladies and gentlemen, by Saliva. John, because we're late, you must choose a song. I must choose. You must do it. Who you doing? John Homburg for the win.

[John]

Let's have some fun, John G. Yes.

[Brady]

No, let's not. I got to do a of editing on that one. I will play it right now. You got it? Yes. Yeah, get it together. We'll do that one right there. But that's it. It's over now. No more. You know what swingers do. No more. Ronnie, you're over there in Gilbert with all your postinos friends and your drama and your rumors with the ladies. You know, they're swingers. Their garage door was open a little bit. Lesson or. Oh, they've got purple lights. Oh, he wears a black ring, throws pineapples. Pineapples in his front yard. You're all just drama nuts. I've heard from swingers all day. None of that's real. We need a universal song. Here it is. Saliva, ladies and gentlemen. And it's solid, and it's KUPD Friendly. So there you go. Take that. This is for you swingers to announce to all us normal people to get out. Yeah, Kup, I win again. It's out of control now. 98 Kupda.