04-14-25 - BR - MON - Man Runs Into Gas Station Runs Away In Crocs - FLA Man Named Cocaine Arrested For Assault - Science Develops Gum To Halt Herpes Outbreaks - New Startup Sperm Racing League Happening Next Week

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode Summary: April 14, 2025

Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Release Date: April 14, 2025
Platform: 98 KUPD (97.9 FM, 98KUPD app, www.98kupd.com)

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1. Unusual Arrests and Legal Incidents

a. Man Runs Into Gas Station in Crocs and Flees

The episode opens with a bizarre incident from Springfield, Missouri, where Dale Hammett, a 45-year-old man, accidentally crashed his 2012 Dodge Ram into a gas station's "come and go" restroom. Following the accident, Hammett attempted to flee the scene but was quickly apprehended by the police. When questioned, he blamed his Crocs shoes for getting stuck on the gas pedal, leading to the mishap.

Dick Toledo (09:35): "They got caught because you were running in Crocs. You're not getting away from wearing Crocs."

b. Florida Man 'Eddie Cocaine' Arrested for Assault

In another arrest story, a Florida man known as Eddie Cocaine was apprehended after assaulting a fellow patron in a subway store. The altercation escalated to physical violence, resulting in his arrest. The hosts humorously discussed the peculiarities surrounding his nickname and appearance.

Brady (11:21): "Eddie Cocaine is white. That's Florida white."

c. Men Arrested Riding Horses Through Walmart

The show also covered a wild stunt from Louisiana where four men rode horses through a Walmart store. Intent on creating a viral sensation, they navigated the store's aisles on horseback, causing significant disruption but fortunately avoiding any injuries. One participant, Mason Webb, mentioned the thrill and temporary fame they achieved.

Larry McFeely (12:43): "Four people in Louisiana have been arrested after they rode their horses through a Walmart last week."

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2. Scientific Advancements

Chewing Gum to Halt Herpes Outbreaks

A significant portion of the episode was dedicated to discussing a breakthrough in virology: a new type of chewing gum developed by scientists from Finland and the United States. This gum is designed to trap and neutralize influenza and herpes viruses, effectively preventing outbreaks.

Larry McFeely (15:29): "Scientists have developed a chewing gum that can trap and neutralize some influenza and herpes viruses."

The hosts delved into the implications of this invention, debating its effectiveness and potential impact on public health.

Brady (16:18): "So it keeps you from having an outbreak. It doesn't cure herpes, but it can prevent an outbreak."

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3. Introducing the Sperm Racing League

Overview of the Startup

One of the standout segments was the introduction of a novel and humorous startup: the Sperm Racing League. Set to launch its first live-streamed event on April 25th, the league features microscopic racetracks where sperm samples compete to determine the fastest swimmers, mimicking the dynamics of a woman's reproductive system.

Larry McFeely (17:37): "A startup company in LA is launching the first sperm racing league, live streaming the first event on April 25th."

Hosts' Take and Humor

The hosts engaged in lively and comedic discussions about the logistics and appeal of sperm racing. They speculated on aspects like race length, betting possibilities, and the potential for celebrity involvement.

Brady (18:58): "Nick Cannon is the FanDuel favorite overall, minus 100. He's got the Usain Bolt of sperm."

They also pondered the cultural impact and the league's potential to make male fertility a topic of public interest.

Brady (43:57): "The goal will be that in the hallway, instead of a pinball machine, we're going to be able to dump our loads in there and then race our sperm for a few bucks."

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4. Tax Day Insights

A brief segment featured poll results about Americans' tax filing statuses. The data revealed that two-thirds of Americans had already filed their taxes, with 16% still working on their returns and 9% yet to start.

Larry McFeely (05:54): "A recent poll shows 70% of employed Americans work full time, 17% part time, and 13% are self-employed."

The hosts discussed the common frustrations with tax refunds, particularly delays in receiving them from state and federal authorities.

Brady (06:38): "I still haven't gotten back the money I owed this year within 18 hours of filing. They have my money, right?"

---

5. Pop Culture and Fun Facts

Nintendo's European Compatibility Challenge

The hosts shared an interesting fact about the original Nintendo: to make it compatible with European TVs, games had to run 17% slower, inadvertently making them easier.

Larry McFeely (04:07): "For the original Nintendo to be compatible with European TVs, they had to run games 17% slower."

Chuck E. Cheese's Origin Story

A humorous take on Chuck E. Cheese's backstory was discussed, portraying the iconic mouse as an orphan who loved children's parties due to not knowing his own birthday.

Larry McFeely (04:45): "Chuck E. Cheese loves celebrating birthdays because he's an orphan who didn't know his own birthday."

The hosts creatively reimagined this narrative, turning it into a quirky character sketch.

---

6. Community and Events

Local Comedy Shows

Towards the episode's end, the hosts promoted upcoming local comedy events in the Valley, highlighting performances by Leo Gonzalez, Randy Felt Face, and Gary Owen at venues like Desert Ridge Improv and Standup Live.

John Holmberg (42:26): "It's time to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week."

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7. Advertising Highlights (Skipped in Summary)

As per instructions, all advertisements, including promotions for MMP Guns, Game Day Men's Health, All Pro Shade Concepts, Toyota, FanDuel, and Doug Hopkins' real estate services, have been omitted from this summary to focus solely on the podcast's content-driven sections.

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8. Host Banter and Humor

Throughout the episode, the hosts engaged in lively banter, providing comedic relief and personal anecdotes. Their chemistry added a lighthearted tone to the discussions, making complex or unusual topics more entertaining for listeners.

Brady (34:28): "No one shows pictures in their wallet anymore. It's all on your phone."

Larry McFeely (35:24): "Maybe it will work for you."

This dynamic interplay between Brady, Larry, Bret, and Dick Toledo exemplified the show's mission to entertain, question, and sometimes disturb its audience with unconventional topics and humor.

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9. Conclusion and Upcoming Highlights

The episode concluded with a humorous segment parodying a cooking show, transitioning into a mock pornographic scene where a host demonstrates making scrambled eggs in an exaggerated manner. This skit underscored the show's penchant for blending satire with everyday topics.

Brady (39:49): "Crack it in her mouth and scramble it. And that's how you make really good scrambled eggs."

Additionally, the hosts teased upcoming segments and encouraged listeners to engage with local events, reinforcing the community-centric nature of the show.

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Final Notes: This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness encapsulated a mix of bizarre news stories, scientific breakthroughs, entrepreneurial ventures, and the hosts' signature humor. From arrest tales involving Crocs and horses in Walmart to the avant-garde sperm racing league, the show maintained its commitment to delivering engaging and unconventional content to its Arizona audience.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Dick Toledo]

It's Dick Toledo from Holberg's Morning Sickness for Game Day Men's Health I did my free consultation with Game Day back in November because I was experiencing a lack of energy and focus. Now, nearly six months later, I'm feeling like my old old self again. Go to gameday phoenix.com today and book a free consultation in a matter of minutes at Game Day's In House lab. A licensed Game Day clinician will draw your blood, run some tests and formulate a plan to incorporate any number of these therap to help you get back in the game. You can battle the clock of aging and it starts today at one of the 11 game day men's Health locations in the valley@gameday phoenix.com Are you looking.

[Brady]

For your next career opportunity? Interested in a position at one of the most state of the art steel mills in the world? CMC is hiring immediately at CMC Steel Arizona in Mesa. Open positions with a $5,000 sign on bonus include automation specialists, industrial electricians and industrial mechanics. Join the next generation of steel makers and help keep our electrical operators and machinery running smoothly here at CMC Ste Arizona in Mesa. To get started, visit jobs.cmc.com CMC is an equal opportunity employer. Still streaming Homberg's Morning sickness [e-mail] this is going to be a good week too. It's supposed to be like in the 70s and stuff, you know. That's another thing about the Easter keg. We've never had like a miserable day for it. I had a little drizzle one year, but nothing like rainy, nasty and gross. I don't think that's supposed to happen this week, but that would be a fun little twist. The weather got in the way because Friday right now it's supposed to be 76 and perfect. Which is.

[Larry McFeely]

That is good.

[Brady]

That is good keg hunting weather. We never miss. So keeping that together. But it has been perfect. Like yesterday was absolutely great. Today's gonna do it again. It's time for you to find out all the things that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our friends at All Pro Shade Concepts, Arizona's best patio shades. If you want to start thinking about the heat, we don't need shade today. But oh, imagine if your backyard could be like this without clouds. Oh, it would be fantastic. Call All Pro Shade Concepts right Now make that outdoor living space a little bit more habitable so you can get out there and hang out even in some higher temperatures. When that shade drops that temperature down a few degrees because you thought forward for summer, we're gonna have sun. You're gonna need shade. All Pro Shade Concepts isAllPro shade.com Brady reported.

[Larry McFeely]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello world.

[Brady]

Hi.

[Larry McFeely]

Happy National Ex Spouse's Day.

[Brady]

Oh, to your ex spouse. Yeah, we're supposed to do.

[John Holmberg]

Themselves.

[Brady]

You call them and tell them about themselves. Hey, remember me? Yeah. Happy ex Spouse Day. Go stuff. I want my money back.

[John Holmberg]

What's the problem?

[Larry McFeely]

Hope life's miserable.

[Brady]

How's my. How's the unearned half you've been spending doing? Oh, you still fat? Dang, I told you you'd have to lose weight to find another guy. There it is.

[Larry McFeely]

Couple of basis fun facts.

[Brady]

Hey, evidently it wasn't me. You used to accuse me of ejaculating Crisco and that's why. But no, turns out everybody since you stayed thin. What happened? I got you a whole bunch of new sweatpants you can quit in Brett's mean Italian ex spouse day. I'd like we should hire Brett to call your ex spouse today and say.

[Larry McFeely]

So so and so wanted me to call.

[Brady]

Yeah. Your hair still look like a bird's nest almost every day. Wondering why you're alone. Huh?

[Larry McFeely]

Give me three things that you could never say to her.

[Brady]

Are you finally off your period? It seemed like that was going on an awesome.

[Larry McFeely]

For the original Nintendo to be compatible with European TVs, they had to. There had to be a special version of the games that ran 17% slower. They were actually much easier. As a result, the day after Osama bin Laden's death, Disney tried to trademark the name Seal Team 6.

[Brady]

But it was rejected because they knew that was May 2nd. If I'm recalling correctly. 2010? Don't know, maybe. Maybe 11.

[Larry McFeely]

The real reason Chuck E. Cheese loves celebrating birthdays. According to a book on his origin story, he's an orphan who didn't know his own birthday. So he loved other kids parties.

[Brady]

That's a. That is a. Flip that around to just a regular guy and suddenly that's a child stalker. Charles Cheese.

[Larry McFeely]

Different for a mouse.

[Brady]

Never knew his own birthday, but he knows yours. What's your name? Kevin. Let's celebrate Kevin's birthday. Something's wrong with the mouse. Nothing's wrong with the mouse. Get in the mouse's pants. This giant rat wants me to get into his overalls. If you tell Your parents, what's happening. The same thing that happened to mine will happen to yours. The pizza's bad. Eat it. Choke down the cardboard cheese, kid.

[Larry McFeely]

Tax days tomorrow. They did a poll on Friday, found that two thirds of Americans have already filed. Everyone else has their calculators out. 16% are still working on them. Another 9% haven't even started.

[Brady]

You know what's nuts? Last year I got a refund, right? I still haven't gotten that check.

[John Holmberg]

Are you serious?

[Brady]

Yeah. Because they're like, we want to assess it and make sure it's right. I'm like, cool. I'm pretty confident it is. There might be an adjustment here and there, but even if it is wrong, it's not going to go crazy. I'll still still haven't gotten back I owed this year within 18 hours of me filing. They've got the money, right? They didn't sit back and think to themselves, well, let's just make sure it's right.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh, you think you owe? Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Okay. Sucked it out. Within 18 hours of click filed, both state and federal are out of my accounts. I mean, same day. And they're not assessing any of my math on this one. They're not going through Steve's work and saying, now your CPA bungled this. We owe you some cash. But man, oh man, I get a couple bucks back last year and it's like a year later, we're not so sure we like this.

[Larry McFeely]

And your money, if you got that to them a year later, imagine how.

[Brady]

Much that would cost if I told them, look, you'll get it eventually. I just have to assess to see if you guys are doing this right. They relied on me to do all the math when it came out in my favor. We're gonna take a look at this. Comes out in their favor. Didn't even take 24 hours. My paycheck doesn't. I get on ADP on Wednesday. It says it's a common but it can't just cash in. You know the amount, you know what's gonna be there. You know, oh, we better not do it.

[John Holmberg]

Are they checking on your party planning company and your painting company?

[Brady]

My stolen identity companies know those aren't part of it this year, but they're keeping an eye on the. I don't remember. A couple. Couple grand. Can't really fire that back to you. I'm being dozed.

[Larry McFeely]

Five years ago, in the middle of the COVID lockdowns and quarantines, most Americans didn't know when they'd returned to the office. There's many as many companies made everything online and remote. And a recent poll shows 70% of employed Americans said they work full time. 17% work part time. 13% are self employed. Says men are more likely to work full time than women. At 76% to 64% brace.

[Brady]

Just throwing out stats. Ladies don't make phone calls or letters. That's not him.

[Larry McFeely]

That's just basically saying 57% of Americans work full time in office, 24% still almost exclusively from home, and 18% do the hybrid thing.

[Brady]

They do both.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah. Some days in the office, some days.

[Brady]

Sleeping at home, pretending to work, working hard. There's no way. There's no way you can tell. I love talking to the girls downstairs like, well, I work at home on this day. Like, yeah, you don't work though, do you? I work harder at home than I do here. No, you don't. No, you don't. That's impossible. No one can possibly do that. You. You flip out. You watch a. An episode of Black Mirror. You're like, jesus, I just wasted two hours. It's inevitable. It's human nature. It's not men, women. It's just if you're at home and you have your creature comforts, a Real housewives marathon. What, you're proud of yourself when you get something done. Oh, man, if there's a. I'd watch that. I'm going to miss the whole day.

[Larry McFeely]

Over the weekend, this dude in Springfield, Missouri, Dale Hammett, he slammed his 2012 Dodge Ram into a come and go. Caused around $37,000 worth of damage. But after the truck slammed in there, got out of the truck and took off running. Police caught up with him, asked him, you know what happened? He said, well, my crocs got caught in the pedal, the gas pedal.

[Brady]

You deserve it.

[Larry McFeely]

And I slammed into the come and go and I freaked out. So that's why I ran.

[Brady]

Also why you got caught, because you were running in crocs. You're not getting away from wearing crocs. You're not getting away from anyone in a running race in Crocs.

[Larry McFeely]

He's looking at a felony anyway.

[John Holmberg]

Sure, it's like those ER doctors and they should be running to the er, but they're wearing crocs.

[Brady]

They can't run.

[John Holmberg]

Put some Jordans on and get over there.

[Brady]

Give me some Jordan.

[Dick Toledo]

Never understood that.

[Brady]

You put the booties on. So there's blood splatter. They're covered. Yeah. Give me a nice pair of Travis Scott's flying. Get me some. Some ones or a nice pair of. Yeah, I want to see you moving. Even the books, they're very comfortable. Yeah. Go get some Devin Bookers. When he plays for his next team, the colors will be different.

[Larry McFeely]

This happened in Florida. This dude, 45 years old, Eddie Cocaine. He rolled into a subway, got upset with someone at the store, got really irate and started to beat on the dude. Cops came in, arrested him. Eddie Cocaine's been said.

[Brady]

His real name.

[Larry McFeely]

That's his real.

[Brady]

Far as we know.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Eddie Cocaine.

[Larry McFeely]

Edward Cocaine.

[Dick Toledo]

Spelled correctly. Not like K O, K a. Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

No, it's spelled just like.

[Brady]

Like the drug Cocaine. No kidding. Eddie Cocaine, your lot in life is sealed at birth.

[Larry McFeely]

What's Eddie look like?

[Brady]

Eddie Cocaine is white.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's a black guy.

[Brady]

You think he's black? I think he's white. Eddie Cocaine's white. That's Florida white.

[John Holmberg]

I think a white guy would change his name.

[Brady]

I'd say short buzz cut hair, maybe balding a little bit. Eddie Cocaine has a tattoo on his neck. I'm throwing that out.

[John Holmberg]

He's an aspiring rapper, short hair, not bald.

[Brady]

Who wins exactly as I described. I didn't give him a weight thing.

[Dick Toledo]

Is that John Vella?

[Brady]

It is our own John Bella. Let me see that. Eddie Cocaine, man. I could have just based on his name, I could have had him drawn and caught.

[John Holmberg]

Originally hails from Payson, Arizona, and he's from Florida.

[Brady]

It's Brevard county and this is the Cocaine family in Florida. That's a very confusing day for everybody. It's over by the Cocaine family. You're gonna have to be more specific. They're all the Cocaine family. Sure enough, Eddie Cocaine. What a. Edward. And it's. He had to change that. Nobody's like, cocaine is.

[Larry McFeely]

I agree.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

That's why I was going. An aspiring rapper. I'm like, okay, yeah, that makes sense.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

Four people in Louisiana have been arrested after they rode their horses through a Walmart last week. It's definitely was a stunt, but, you know, to get viral. Oh, film it going through there. One of the four men, Mason Webb, told the local news. He goes, I mean, it was fun. And we were famous for a minute because when that went viral, we didn't hurt anybody. He also joked that the animals were emotional support horses.

[Brady]

Perfect.

[Larry McFeely]

It shows them all four walking through the.

[Brady]

It's like well behaved a guy last week or whenever that had the seven tigers for emotional support taken from him.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And you're like, how do you. Yeah. Seven of them. How do you keep. I mean, how do you like one?

[Larry McFeely]

And his argument was, hey, people have all sorts of exotic for support 7.

[Brady]

Like why wasn't the first one cutting it? You needed a second emotional support tiger. And then that one wasn't cutting it, so you added a third. It's like, geez, I need more of these tigers. Morning sickness. Morning sickness.

[Unknown]

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[Dick Toledo]

It's stick to little for FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook right now. With FanDuel, you can make the smarter play with performance trends. You can get the latest stats right inside the app and see who's heating up. Get started today by visiting FanDuel.com KUPD and you'll get started with 200 in bonus bets guaranteed when you place your first $5 bet. Make every moment more with FanDuel, official sports betting partner of the NBA 21 plus in President Arizona first online real money wager only $5 first deposit required. Bonus issue does not withdrawal bonus bets that expire seven days after receipt restrictions apply. See terms of sportsbook.fanduel.com gambling problem. Call 1-800-next-step or text next step to 533-42-HARBURG'S morning sickness.

[Larry McFeely]

The other thing is they had to get over there pretty quick because you're taking them away from me. They knew he's I'm opening the gates.

[Brady]

Yeah. Just going to let him go.

[Larry McFeely]

He threatened to free him, right?

[Brady]

To go be emotionally supportive elsewhere.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, they'll spark some emotions.

[Brady]

But again, one should do it. If you've jumped up to 7, I'm not so sure you're emotionally supported at all. You just keep searching for one that's going to work.

[Larry McFeely]

Scientists from Finland and the United States have developed a special type of chewing gum that can trap and neutralize some influenza and herpes viruses.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's not going to give us all cancer. Wait, it takes your herpes away?

[Larry McFeely]

Yes. They've Designed it over the counter.

[Brady]

Do I have to chew it in my mouth?

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh, just go stuff it in. Some girl. Let's go here. Let's get rid of these bumps and start smashing the lips together like an.

[Larry McFeely]

Old man eating the viral says 95% for flu. While the herpes causing viruses, the HSV1 and HSV2, 160mg is enough to be required to help basically keep the herpes.

[Brady]

It staves off, like sores.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

So it keeps you from having an outbreak.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

It doesn't cure herpes. Well. Oh, boy, here comes some guessing.

[John Holmberg]

Ceiling tiles.

[Brady]

Here we go.

[Larry McFeely]

It. It curtails it, basically.

[Brady]

It does not heal, it does not cure it.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah. And if you have it can prevent it though.

[Brady]

It can prevent an outbreak. Right, but can it prevent it if I don't have it? Don't say that. It's not a vaccine. No, no. So it can't prevent herpes. Right. It just keeps you from having outbreaks. Maybe. What flavor is it?

[Larry McFeely]

I think they'll have multiple flavors, but you can buy the pack and you can store it at room temperature for 800 days.

[Brady]

That was the plan.

[Larry McFeely]

All those flavors they have.

[Brady]

Here we go.

[Larry McFeely]

Fruity Tootie.

[Brady]

You're making it up.

[Larry McFeely]

I'm making it up?

[Dick Toledo]

You just like saying tooty.

[Brady]

The newest sport, Fruity tootie, is how you end up with herpes. Most of the time, you start acting like a fruity tooty.

[Larry McFeely]

A startup company in LA says it's launching the first sperm racing league. They're live streaming the first event on April 25th.

[Brady]

I'm gonna watch this from the Hollywood.

[Larry McFeely]

Palladium Theater on Sunset Boulevard. Tickets to see it in person go on sale today. They built a microscopic racetrack so guys can go head to head to see who's got the fastest swimmers. The track mimics the dynamics of a woman's reproductive system. So we're guessing there's no actual egg involved.

[Brady]

So, dude, shoot their shot on like a. Like one of those glass plates for microscope.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, with a little cover sheet.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna watch live with that. Two dudes jerking it?

[Brady]

No, no, it's after effect. Brett, you don't have to. You can watch the pregame if you want to.

[Larry McFeely]

What?

[Brady]

I'm not gonna do stupid.

[Larry McFeely]

They said it's about making male fertility something people actually want to talk about. Track and improve. The new league will have every everything other sports have, including press conferences, weigh ins, play by play, commentary, and betting. You'll be able to pick favorites and bet on winners first Racial. First race will feature competitors from UCLA and usc. College kids, crosstown rivalry, Trojans versus Bruins. Yep.

[Brady]

In a sperm race.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna check FanDuel on this.

[Larry McFeely]

FanDuel favorite overall is Nick Cannon.

[Brady]

Oh, his.

[Larry McFeely]

Minus 100.

[Brady]

He's got the usain Bolt of sperm. Ah. Makes me wish I was still producing. Oh, that's imp. I want to. I want to watch that. I'd be. I think that's fantastic. And I would.

[Larry McFeely]

I wonder how long the race would be then, you know.

[Brady]

You mean how long does it take for sperm to swim?

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, I don't think they have a.

[Brady]

Great distance, you know.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah. Stamina.

[John Holmberg]

You don't think.

[Larry McFeely]

I mean, will it be like a hundred meter sprint?

[Brady]

No, I don't think they're prepared.

[Larry McFeely]

Like, is it 9 sec. I'm saying, is it a 9 second.

[Brady]

Race or is that's why we got to tune in? I don't know how fast sperm is.

[John Holmberg]

So what's the date? What. What are we.

[Larry McFeely]

April 25th.

[John Holmberg]

25Th.

[Brady]

Pay per view.

[John Holmberg]

Pay per view?

[Brady]

Yeah. Yes. And now I wish. I wish I had kept some of my old junk to throw it in there and see what. See what the boys could do. Did I have my own little Ryan Lochte? They have a Michael Phelps in there that was just going to backstroke in the temporary valve. No, mine's all burned up.

[Dick Toledo]

It's all burned up.

[Larry McFeely]

I don't think it sounds like it's not a pay per view. It's just a live streaming. But you pay for tickets to.

[Brady]

No, you have to pay to go see it live. But live stream and the website again. Brady, this is better than chicks in space.

[Larry McFeely]

Sperm racing dot com.

[Brady]

Well, that's straightforward. Chicks in no. Sperm racing dot com. I actually have written this down. Toledo. Hold on to that. April 25th. All right, let's make sure that we're on top of this. I don't know if it's gonna be exciting, but if you've got money on.

[Dick Toledo]

It, it's next Friday.

[Brady]

No, it's 11 days from now. Is that next Friday? Is that old? That's April 26. Jesus Christ.

[John Holmberg]

One day here.

[Dick Toledo]

No, it's 11 days from.

[Brady]

No, but what happened to the year? No, it's got to be like. I think it's February still.

[Dick Toledo]

It says one day.

[Brady]

Yeah. Wait a second. The world's first ever sperm race says it's a day away. Brady, fake news. Hold on.

[Dick Toledo]

Thousand plus seats.

[Brady]

That's April 15th. Would be maybe you missed. Do you know twos and ones this.

[Larry McFeely]

April 25th live streaming, April 25th. But maybe that is.

[Brady]

Maybe they're not streaming this one. Although it does look like sperm racing.com has got a countdown clock.

[Larry McFeely]

This could be a typo.

[John Holmberg]

And it's a manifesto here.

[Brady]

Do we have any, like. They had to have tested this before to make sure that it's viable.

[John Holmberg]

Two legends, one microscopic track.

[Brady]

I'm dying to see this. What is the speed of sperm? I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Here, I'll print this for you so you can.

[Brady]

Yeah, give me some. I'm gonna do some research.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

If it's tomorrow, then the Scott guy just said this is the first time since I got it. I regret being snipped. Same.

[John Holmberg]

Not me.

[Brady]

In. In the long run. Yes. Wouldn't you like to have one day to see how fast they were? Should have done that when I was younger. I know my voice could swim. They were quick. I think I had, you know, a good. I think I had a good batch in the. In my prime. I. It was. There was a lot of volume. We had some good. Back then. It was like, you know, I worried about decorating the face. I might give a girl a black eye. That stuff was powerful.

[Dick Toledo]

Johnny Sinus was in his prime.

[Brady]

It was. They were. It was powerful. Like. Yeah. I wanted to snap a head back, you know, a recoil. I wanted somebody to have to see a throat doctor when I was done because something might have torn. That stuff was coming, and now it's like a kid with cerebral palsy throwing up. That's the noise it makes when it's done. It kind of drools out. It looks like a leaky boat.

[Larry McFeely]

Jet puffed wants you to dye marshmallows for Easter.

[Brady]

Hey, that's smart.

[Larry McFeely]

They actually put out a dyeing kit at Walmart and it sold out really quick. So they're gonna.

[Brady]

You can't really. Well, I guess you could decorate it.

[Larry McFeely]

The picture that I saw of some of the marshmallows look pretty interesting. What's a.

[Brady]

Because you think the dye would just absorb right into the marshmallow. But, yeah, that might be better than eggs.

[Larry McFeely]

Each dip in decorate kit comes with six dies. A set of decorating pens, pack of jumbo marshmallows, Size of the eggs. So if you don't want to do the potatoes, get a big, big old.

[Brady]

Bag of jet puff because nobody's doing eggs. Supposed to dye everything but that.

[Larry McFeely]

I was thinking that maybe we should throw that in with our kegs. A couple dozen eggs for each keg family.

[Brady]

That's too much money. We're only giving away five grand, Brady.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, that's right.

[Brady]

The eggs are too high. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Sperm racing sounds way better than the wnba.

[Brady]

I'm in. Brittney Griner could still win. She was in a paternity suit once. That's true. I would. Yeah, the sperm race. I would. I'd put, you know, and that's like, you can't dominate as a group. That's just anybody. Like, you're not going to have, like, maybe, maybe. The Jamaicans are amazing at it.

[Dick Toledo]

I was just going to say it's like your Chinese bet you can beat.

[Brady]

I would put all my money on them. The Chinese probably have the fastest sperm and in India is second.

[Larry McFeely]

They just make people like crazy.

[Brady]

Their sperms work. They're industrious, I'll say that. Maybe not fast, but they're blue collar. They're hard workers. They get the job done. American sperm, you know whose sperm's terrible? Japanese.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Their birth rate's been dropping for years. Yeah. If I had to guess, I'd say that the. The Chinese are the blacks of sperm racing. They're going to be the most athletic ones. I think that I'm dying to see this. Can you scream, come on, come on. During the sperm race, or is that a proper chance?

[Larry McFeely]

All right, I got a couple of pretty videos.

[Brady]

Hit it.

[Larry McFeely]

First one's little bowl over the car. Actual.

[Brady]

Say bull.

[Larry McFeely]

A bull.

[Brady]

Oh, okay. Oh, here comes a bull. And it jumps a car in traffic. There's a guy just running away. We're in the middle of it. There's a dog, too.

[Larry McFeely]

Like, is this dog Brahma Bull.

[Brady]

There was a Brahma bull.

[John Holmberg]

PHX arena right during the.

[Brady]

That's right before WNBA opening season. It's a opening day. What a cruddy country that is that a bull chases a guy into traff. Labrador. See, I feel like Dual lingo just was talking to me for a second. Manzanita. Manzana apples.

[Larry McFeely]

Next one.

[Brady]

That's the only thing I learned on dual. I spent weeks on that thing and I went back. It's. Let me just say this, the duolingo. You get going, you're like, I'm getting good at this. It is. It's perishable. You take a few weeks off, you go back. Ombre es manzita. No, nothing. I got nothing.

[Larry McFeely]

Next one is this dude on his motorcycle and he's doing a little play by play. Sees this old lady across the road.

[Brady]

Okay. Cruising along. There's a lady just standing in the road. Oh, man, that truck hit the Old lady. Yeah, Something about a beehive. I'm with you.

[Dick Toledo]

No, madre.

[Brady]

No madre. No, madre is not gonna beehive.

[Larry McFeely]

Oh.

[Brady]

Oh, man. It's a freeway. She's just walking on the freeway. We'll go. Get off the road.

[Larry McFeely]

Get out there.

[Brady]

There.

[Larry McFeely]

She did it again.

[Brady]

I can't watch that a couple more times.

[Unknown]

Spring is in full swing now, and summer is right around the corner. Hey, it's Larry McFeely. And there's no better time to hit the trails, the lakes, and those wide open desert roads in a brand new Toyota. Whether you're hauling gear to Roosevelt Lake in the powerful Toyota Tundra, navigating rocky trails in the rugged Tacoma, or exploring Sedona in The all new 4Runner, Toyota's got the muscle and comfort to match your most excellent adventures. Head to your Valley toyota dealer or valleytoyotadealers.com today and gear up for summer in a ride that's built for the heat and the adventures. Summer starts here. Toyota. Let's go places.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, Byron. I was [e-mail]'s website. You have everything, and the prices are incredible.

[Unknown]

Yes, sir. Mmpguns.com has over 400,000 products for sale daily. Everything from firearms, ammunition, accessories, optics, clothing, decoys, and more. The best part is, if you see it on our website, it's in stock and ready to ship.

[John Holmberg]

Wait, there's no backorders?

[Unknown]

Nope. We work with all our distributors, so what you see on our site is what's actually available. We ship all over the country, so we're not just for Arizonans anymore. If the firearm you want is legal in your state, we can get it to a dealer for you to pick up.

[John Holmberg]

Sounds simple. That's why I always go to mmpguns.com.

[Brady]

It'S John Holmberg here. Time to talk about TV's Doug Hopkins of my home group and Doug hopkins.com TV's Doug Hopkins. He has built and established his brand and company in a way that just has no competition. Doug's been here for a long time. He set the Standard for over 25 years, and he just keeps getting better. And that said, if you want to sell your house for cash to Doug as is, he'll make you that offer. Start the process online. Doughns.com or listen to the Doug Hopkins singers. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Larry McFeely]

Last one's a little highlight from the masters. Yeah, Jordan Spieth. Now watch as he walks through the crowd. They are investigating to see if he nutted this guy. On purpose.

[Brady]

He hits a guy in the balls.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah. He's holding his potter and this guy.

[Brady]

Yes, he did. And then he grinned a little bit. He did it on purpose. Why would they investigate? That's hilarious. Does he know the guy gave him.

[Larry McFeely]

A little tap right in the dick?

[Brady]

Yeah, he gave him a little dick tap. That's great.

[Dick Toledo]

What's the investigation?

[Brady]

What's the investigation?

[Larry McFeely]

Because it's the masters and the behavior of a PGA player.

[Dick Toledo]

Never going to be able to prove that.

[Brady]

Yeah. What if you hit him in the leg? It was right there. It was a clean shot. Every. Every golf guy's been tapped by the edge of the thing in the balls to rite of passage on the course. Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

You see where I hit this?

[Brady]

You do the one off the club. Brady will hold the club face here would I got the ball right here on the club face and you look and then he'll whip the handle into your balls. I've seen him catch 30. Oh, he loves every second of it. He's five. I've seen it. I've seen it work. Do that to CH 20 or 25 times. We might have done it to Chuck.

[Larry McFeely]

We dropped Chuck.

[Brady]

See where I got that ball there, Cha? Right there in the face. Clunk. Right? Just nuts.

[Dick Toledo]

No wonder he hated you.

[Brady]

Sorry about that. Oh, there were several reasons. Chuck hated us for a lot of reasons. First off, you didn't buy him 12 cartons of cigarettes and he was running. He was running low. Never seen anybody smoke more in my life. And then his name wasn't Cha. It was Joe. Right. We just couldn't understand him, so we called him Cha.

[Larry McFeely]

I am Cha.

[Brady]

Is that your name? Okay. I'm John. Okay, Cha. Cha. I'm saying that. Knock it off.

[Dick Toledo]

Texters are saying that was speech agent.

[Brady]

So yeah, you're allowed to knock him in the nuts. That's her friends. Yeah, it was nothing better. Not a lot better than when Brady will knock somebody in the balls with that stupid trick. And it happens and they fall for it every time. Another one was when the. If you know that the. You know, you're a cute cart girl. When Brady walks up to you and goes to take American money. I just got back from Hawaii. I got. Or do you take Hawaiian money? You take Hawaiian money? I just got back from. From Hawaii. Yeah. All right, great. Good job there. Hey, by the way, are you local or from around here? And then they're like, hahaha. I'm like, oh, Brady's making his moves on the cart girl with his dad jokes. It's a progressive ad. It's Dr. Rick.

[Larry McFeely]

I gotta start bringing those back.

[Brady]

Strong John Michael.

[John Holmberg]

Golfing for that. Just to see that.

[Brady]

Strong John.

[Dick Toledo]

Check the fanduel. Usc, UCLA may be in the names, but wait until those soakers from BYU get in there.

[Brady]

Boy, those kids are built up.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, they are.

[Brady]

Their stuff's going to be like a jailbreak. Yeah, the usc, UCLA kids get to use theirs. Their stuff might be a little bit entitled. Those BYU kids. That's a good one right there. All right. In the United States, I'm putting BYU pretty high on the list of shooters. That's a. That's a powerhouse school, man. You local are from around here. They always answer, oh, I. I live here. Take wine money. I just got back from the Big Island.

[Dick Toledo]

You still have your pride and joy in your wallet?

[Larry McFeely]

I don't. I'll. I'll take it back in here.

[Brady]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Larry McFeely]

It's due.

[Brady]

No, no. Have you seen that one picture of pride and Joy? Cleaning products. You want to see my pride and joy? He'd open his wallet and there's a picture of pride and Joy. The Christ. Yeah, and he's dying over here, loving it. No, you're laughing.

[John Holmberg]

Pride and joy stuff.

[Brady]

You don't know. Pride and joy. Joy was like a dish.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, okay, I remember that, but.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

How many people under 50 are going to remember?

[Brady]

Look, I'll tell you this right now.

[Larry McFeely]

We're bringing it back.

[Brady]

No, nobody remembered it. And then he would have a picture of it and everyone stare at it and look at him like, what are you doing?

[Larry McFeely]

And he was framed on my desk.

[Brady]

There it is. Pride and joy. And he. And he was in.

[Larry McFeely]

A little two by three.

[Brady]

No one laughed at the joke except Brady. No one. And I think he thought the whole world was on its knees giggling. It was only him. And then I saw his dad do it.

[Dick Toledo]

What?

[Brady]

Same exact Bogan reaction. And everybody's looking at him like, what the hell's wrong with these two? No one ever went, oh, that's hilarious. Wanna see my pride and joy? Here we go. Okay. That's good stuff. And everybody's looking at him like, what just happened? Why'd this retarded lady just tell me the cleaning supplies in her. What's going on?

[Larry McFeely]

It shuts down. People showing pictures.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, it shuts.

[Brady]

It doesn't. No one shows pictures in their wallet anymore.

[Dick Toledo]

It's all on your phone.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, put it on your phone.

[Brady]

Put it on your phone. Yeah, I can do that.

[Dick Toledo]

Wallpaper.

[Brady]

Yeah, just make it Your screen saver. I always keep picture my pride and joy on it. Oh, God, I'm glad we all had a laugh at that.

[Dick Toledo]

You might want to prep Matthias.

[John Holmberg]

Great.

[Brady]

Not one of us had a laugh at that. Just you. That was good. Everybody was on the floor.

[Larry McFeely]

Had an 8 by 11 on my desk.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God.

[Brady]

Yeah, it was bad. It had to be. There had to be some curbing the pride and joy was your dad's thing. Like, he passed it down to you?

[Larry McFeely]

No, it was Mike Jorgensen.

[Brady]

Oh, he had it.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

How'd that end?

[Larry McFeely]

Not good for him.

[Brady]

Yeah, whatever.

[John Holmberg]

The Mike Jorgensen.

[Brady]

Jeez. Mike killed himself.

[Dick Toledo]

Killed himself in Mexico.

[Brady]

So you're telling me you wanted to be a standup comic and it wasn't working out? Why is no one laughing at my jokes? Here, Betty, you take this. It's brought me great pain.

[John Holmberg]

Down.

[Larry McFeely]

That's where I got it.

[Brady]

It's brought me great pain.

[Larry McFeely]

Last card.

[Brady]

Maybe it will work for you. All right, Brett, what do you got?

[John Holmberg]

Nothing compared to that.

[Brady]

No pride and joy. I did used to enjoy the watching dudes get smashed in the nuts by Brady's club. And nobody ever takes a swing at you when you do. You do that. Just at a bus stop. We're just like, see my golf club I got here. You hit a guy in the nuts with. You're getting into a fight on a golf course. It's just hilarious.

[Dick Toledo]

We found another Brady. I love you, Brady. My uncle had the exact same picture in his wallet, and I always claimed that he always carries a picture of his pride and joy. I loved it.

[Brady]

Yeah, because you were six.

[John Holmberg]

Signed Kirby Bogan.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah. Urban Herbs.

[Dick Toledo]

Don't listen to these haters, Brady. It's funny. I'm really, genuinely laughing right now.

[Brady]

You're laughing.

[John Holmberg]

Sign Bunny Bogan.

[Brady]

Yeah. And I can tell you sign Bo. Late tour emailing from heaven. Why aren't they laughing? No, I've witnessed it. Nobody thinks it's funny, but the guy doing it. I've witnessed it. And you know, like, I go with Brett's route like, oh, Christ, here we go. Oh. And I walk away like, oh, this is going to end with groaning.

[Dick Toledo]

So we used to be able to time it during the MILF contest. Yeah, he'd break out at what time he'd break that?

[Brady]

He hit that early on. He liked his.

[Larry McFeely]

They're showing their kids.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's right. All right, I'll be here all week. It's funny with the ladies because they know what the cleaning supplies are, the good ones that's good stuff.

[Larry McFeely]

Bb.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Give me that number.

[Brady]

What do you got?

[John Holmberg]

All right, we've seen this one before, but in honor of. Of Country Thunder that happened this weekend.

[Brady]

I forgot about dumb thunder and I didn't hear anybody. Was there. Just a bunch of people. Just hillbilly passing out and probably. Oh, here we go. By the Porta John's a country thumb girl in jean shorts yelling at another girl. I didn't hear it. Okay, they're in a. They're in a face to face fight now at the Porta John over banging. The door opens to one of them. There's a girl trying to come out of what all. They push in. They go into the Porta John to fight. Oh, she's gonna swirl here. She's getting her upside down in the Porta John. They're gonna dunk her hat. We have now four women in the Porta John fighting. And one's head.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, almost the top.

[Brady]

Here we go. Now Shania pulls the other one out by the ponytail. Nice. Goes back in to close the. Oh, she's cleaning the deal up. The blonde, the late arriving blonde is mopping up.

[Larry McFeely]

Why would you.

[Brady]

Did none of the girls go into the toilet? Now she's going to do another one and just pulling another broad out. Wow, there is a lot of decent but not great looking women fighting in this video. And holy cow.

[Dick Toledo]

Still going in there with all that going on.

[Brady]

I still have to pee.

[Dick Toledo]

I can wait.

[Brady]

Women can't wait. They have to go. She didn't get that one. They were trying to dunk her.

[John Holmberg]

No, I know. In that blue water.

[Brady]

Luckily that last blonde came in and stole her out of there. That was getting close to the worst thing I've ever seen.

[John Holmberg]

This one's entitled Rob try to rob a Dollar Tree store. F around to find out.

[Brady]

Dollar Tree store robbery. We're outside trying to open the doors of the Dollar Tree. Doors are open. Guy coming out. I don't know what's going on. We're at that. We're just at the door.

[Dick Toledo]

Somebody's going in because they got the keys closed.

[Brady]

Oh, here comes a dude. Oh, security at the door. As a guy tries to run away. Catches a hundred punches in the face. Still punching him in the face. That ought to do it. 40 landed shot. Should close the door on the robber. I didn't even see that guy coming. Oh, now we're dragging him back into the dollar store, which is what you're supposed to do with your victim. Never leave him.

[John Holmberg]

No, I pulled him outside.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, that is Coming in as a robber breath.

[Brady]

That's so. Yeah, that's a mistake. Wow. Yeah. You always leave your victim inside.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, man, mess around in Maryville. That's what happens.

[Dick Toledo]

But if you tell one story right.

[Brady]

A cop told me that if you. If you got a guy and you beat him up on your patio, pull him into the house. Because if he's outside, there's an argument his lawyer will make that says he was trying to get away. Always drag the body that you just killed into the home after you jackhammer that face.

[Larry McFeely]

Like that guy did.

[Brady]

Yeah. You jackhammer him out there and he was trying to run away. Yeah, drag him back into the house for sure. Great legal advice right there. All right.

[John Holmberg]

And we'll just end with some cooking for Brady.

[Brady]

Okay, ladies? Got it Right. I'm Dani Spies, and I'm showing you how to make really good scrambled eggs. Okay. And it just cuts to a lady. Oh, Jesus. The lady has landing. Hold on, I'll explain it. This gets weird because it starts. All right, Danny. It starts with a regular cooking show, and then. You see. And then it cuts to a porno where a guy cracks a raw egg into a girl's mouth and then uses his utensil to scramble it in her mouth.

[John Holmberg]

There's your next song there, Toledo.

[Brady]

Now that you know, let's watch again, shall we? Go in.

[John Holmberg]

Start from the beginning.

[Brady]

Yeah. I'm Dani Spies, and I'm showing you how to make really good scrambled eggs. Crack it in. It's in her mouth. Here's what I do.

[John Holmberg]

And you beat the eggs.

[Brady]

There are no ideas in porn they haven't tried. They crack a raw egg in her mouth and scramble it. I bet you that'd be good. And they do it. Somewhere out there is a willing participant. She's got a smile on her face. Yeah, she's got a raw egg in her mouth. And the dudes.

[John Holmberg]

The sound is great.

[Brady]

Scrambling it.

[Larry McFeely]

He is.

[Brady]

They're mixing the eggs, and they're making eggs. I didn't realize what a grotesque sound it was.

[Larry McFeely]

Flesh whisker.

[Brady]

That's right. Flesh Whisker is a great band name. Spelled with an H. Go with flesh whisker. Confuse everybody. And then. But the. The logo is the whisker, but it's spelled with an H, not W. I W, H. Make it right. Wow. What a day. All right, There you go. Somebody's like, I laugh at everything Brady says. Signed, Arthur Fleck, the Joker. It's a great joke right there. Well done, Craig. There goes your Brady report. It's 98 KupDPD Hey Byron.

[John Holmberg]

I heard you have something new to announce from MMP Guns, Brett, I sure do.

[Unknown]

It's MMP Guns. Customs MMP Guns is creating some amazing firearms. We offer polishing, plating, bluing, custom laser engraving, laser stippling, cerakoting and performance upgrades. We do everything in house with our master trained craftsman. You can select our designs or make up your own.

[John Holmberg]

Well, can you do this to my gun?

[Unknown]

We can do it to nearly any firearm. Doesn't matter where you live, you can ship it to us or we already have completed firearms and inventory daily with no wait.

[John Holmberg]

Well, there you have it. MMP Guns on the northeast corner of 12th street and Indian School or online at mmpgunscustoms.com all right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get up north to Desert Ridge to see comedy sets from Leo Gonzalez and Tempe at the Improv. You've got Randy Felt Face performing. Just Google it. And you're gonna have to go see.

[Brady]

For yourself on that one.

[John Holmberg]

And downtown at Standup Live, the very funny Gary Owen entertains you all this week. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness.

[Brady]

My emails are erupting with spring sperm racing arguments. There is one thing that they have figured out. If you want men to be interested in it, make it gambling worthy. Make it so he can gain or lose cash on it. Says the sperm racing isn't about racing the sperm. It's about turning health into a competition about making male fertility something people actually want to track and improve. We're taking a topic no one likes to touch and making it something measurable and weirdly changing this paradigm so men can talk about it. Because evidently, and I didn't even know this till right now, that if your sperm's slow, something's wrong with you.

[Dick Toledo]

So is the goal to have, like you, me, Brett Brady go eventually.

[Brady]

And the goal will be that in the hallway, instead of a pinball machine, okay, we're gonna be able to dump our loads in there and then race our sperm for a few bucks. It's kind of like when you see all those rap videos where dudes are shooting dice in an alley. The future is now sperm racing.

[Dick Toledo]

Stanley Hubbard is sad he missed that, right?

[Brady]

What do you mean? He's alive. Is he? Yeah. Jesus, God, don't kill our. Don't Kill our overlord. Why would Stanley Hubbard not want to be involved in that? In fact, a guy his age, he's the one who should most likely be involved in this. Somebody his age should be like, let's see what I'm firing. If he's still got some swimmers in there. If he didn't tie the tubes and burn them off like Burt and I did, that's a fantastic thing. But yeah, you guys are emailing and everybody's picking their favors. If you can make it to where we can bracket things and gamble.

[Dick Toledo]

John, would it be considered cheating if we had Sophia Vergara host?

[Brady]

I don't know. That makes your sperm faster. Might make it dumb.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, that could be.

[Brady]

You know, you go faster with something awful you slow down with. I mean, you can still lose control, but I think they're just dumb and happy and kind of misguided when they're.

[Larry McFeely]

Going all over the place.

[Brady]

Yeah, they're like, that's chaotic. When it's just like. I think what you want is utilitarian stuff.

[Larry McFeely]

The ones that, you know that beeline for that.

[Brady]

A. Yeah. You just want the sperms to go, I'm not enjoying this and you're not. Let's just go A to B. The less I see, the better. It's like driving through Texas. Let's just speed through this. You're not. There's no beautiful visions. There's no pull offs. There's nothing that's just straight line.

[Dick Toledo]

John, what you just said, is sperm a topic nobody wants to touch. And they wonder why the divorce rate is so high.

[Brady]

That's so true. If women made sperm, we'd have cups of it in the fridge. It's true.

[Dick Toledo]

You're right.

[Brady]

If women did that, we're like, ah, they're sell this. I'd be rubbing it all over. It'd be constant.

[Dick Toledo]

There's nine different jars on my vanity right now of sperm.

[Brady]

All right, I'm going to shut you off of that guy. Wow. Nope. Turned him off. You heard it here first. Kido's got nine different jars of sperm on his. On his bathroom. That's enough of you talking, Paula. Pro is right. Yeah, no, that's. They've, you know, they don't want any of our stuff. We gotta talk them into it. If they had it, it'd be a shelf at the store. You know how much money. What's that Gwyneth Paltrow makes on that goop. Goop. And her candles that smell like her vagina. And you couldn't have like John's dick smelling candle and have it sell. I'd go to jail for thinking about it.

[Dick Toledo]

Could you're just not enough to try it.

[Brady]

She has candles that are like this smells like probably my junk. And she sells it and women buy it.

[Dick Toledo]

I think she's just getting over on everybody.

[Brady]

Maybe. But we're interested. If I said, hey, the sweet, sweet smell of my penis I've put into a wax candle. If you want to burn it, it's like you're going to hell. And you wouldn't be wrong. That's not a good. Sometimes I can smell it and I don't want it.

[John Holmberg]

Of course, Martin never came out and said that actually smells like that. Look, he did the Pepsi Challenge with him or anything. You know, two candles, a Yankee candle and Gwyneth.

[Brady]

He said, there it is. That's her. Smells a little bit like a badger. And when you hit a skunk on a road, unmistakable.

[Larry McFeely]

Musky with sandalwood.

[Brady]

Yeah, I believe that one's from anthropology. Oh, that's definitely Gwyneth's munge. Main gay. Anyway, it's time for the Guadalupe replay. We do it on Friday, we replay it on Monday. Why wouldn't we? John Travolta's brother was offered to us as a guest to talk. I didn't know he had an autistic brother in his 70s, but he does and the guy's totally normal. But evidently he's a spokesperson now. So we had Joey and John Travolta in. Cesar Milan made an appearance. He's back. And I believe Trump did some some work. This is an easy one. It's your Guadalupe replay. Everybody sit back and enjoy. It's 98, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. It's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness. And it's time once again for this week's Pick of the Litter, brought to you by our friends at Turf monsters. Go to turfmonstersaz.com they help us out at Lost our home pet rescue. We appreciate them greatly. This week's Peck of the Litter is a project. It's Jep. He's a special project for that special someone. Jep is one of my projects. Let's get him a forever home. They'll waive the fees right now. It's this week. Pick of the Litter. It's Jep. Check it out. Lost our home.org 98kupd.com.