04-21-25 - Last Of Us May Be The Reason Our Dads Taught Us To Hate Too Much Pubic Hair - Billy Ray Cyrus Might Be Dating Elizabeth Hurley - Latest S*Heel Of Year Candidate Killed A Chihuahua w/A Shovel To Protect Chickens

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: April 21, 2025
Title: Last Of Us May Be The Reason Our Dads Taught Us To Hate Too Much Pubic Hair - Billy Ray Cyrus Might Be Dating Elizabeth Hurley - Latest S*Heel Of Year Candidate Killed A Chihuahua w/A Shovel To Protect Chickens

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1. Introduction to the Episode

In this lively episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness (HMS), Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, host John Holmberg alongside Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo delve into a mix of pop culture commentary, humorous debates, and shocking local news. The episode aired on April 21, 2025, and covers a range of topics from the latest twists in popular TV series to bizarre incidents involving pet animals.

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2. The Impact of TV Shows on Society

Brett Vesely kicks off the conversation by discussing the surprising plot developments in the latest season of "The Last of Us", comparing its unexpected twists to those famously seen in "Game of Thrones".

Brett Vesely [02:21]: "None of you guys watching the Last of Us. No, I haven't been shocked by TV in a long time. Probably Game of Thrones was the last one."

The hosts reflect on how "The Last of Us" has captivated gamers and TV enthusiasts alike, creating a shared cultural experience that was seemingly lost amidst the fragmentation of modern entertainment.

Brett Vesely [03:30]: "We're like, oh, something good happening here."

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3. The Great Pubic Hair Debate

Transitioning from TV shows, Brett launches into a humorous and somewhat controversial debate about pubic hair trends and the generational influence of fathers.

Brett Vesely [07:05]: "There’s a reason dudes don't want to kiss dudes with hair. We don't want to kiss girls with hair down there. We made you, you ladies into thinking that was a great idea."

The conversation humorously critiques societal norms and the supposed backlash instilled by previous generations, tying it back to the influence of media and personal preferences.

Brett Vesely [09:22]: "I'll go thank my dad today. If you're lucky enough to still have your father and he's 78 or younger, you go in and thank him for taking all those hair bullets for us."

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4. The "Shame" Segment: Chihuahua Tragedy

One of the most intense segments of the episode revolves around a local incident where a man was caught on camera brutally beating a chihuahua with a shovel. The hosts vehemently express their outrage and disbelief.

Brett Vesely [22:37]: "Shame. Shame. Shame. Them if you know them. Shame if you know his name tell it to me. Shame."

Brett and Larry McFeely passionately condemn the act, highlighting the man's justification of self-defense against a small dog and emphasizing the disproportionate violence used.

Brett Vesely [24:36]: "If you're out there right now and I say this and hope it actually happens, most of the time my words are idle and float out there and mean nothing. If you're listening right now, Peoria guy, hang yourself today."

The discussion includes satirical suggestions and exaggerated scenarios to underscore the absurdity and cruelty of the incident, making a stark commentary on animal abuse and societal responses.

Brett Vesely [35:20]: "I'm going to be the first to put his name on the air in any media thing. And you can sue me later."

The segment serves as a platform for the hosts to voice strong opinions on animal rights and justice, blending humor with serious commentary.

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5. Celebrity News: Billy Ray Cyrus and Elizabeth Hurley

Shifting gears, the hosts discuss rumors about Billy Ray Cyrus potentially dating Elizabeth Hurley, injecting humor and skepticism into the conversation.

Brett Vesely [15:14]: "I think he twinking around. Yeah, I don't know if he's twinking around."

Brett humorously compares Billy Ray Cyrus’s resurgence and appearance to that of a classic figure, playfully critiquing the relationship dynamics.

Brett Vesely [15:50]: "Billy Ray is basically a 70s vagina with teeth."

The hosts speculate on the authenticity of the rumors, intertwining personal opinions with pop culture references.

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6. Reflections on Past Incidents and Pop Culture

The episode also touches upon historical celebrity moments, such as Hugh Grant’s infamous encounter with a prostitute, drawing parallels to current events and media portrayals.

Brett Vesely [17:52]: "He didn't just accidentally pick up Divine Brown. That's the time he got caught."

This reflection serves to contextualize current celebrity news within a broader narrative of media scandals and public perceptions.

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7. Closing Thoughts and Audience Engagement

Towards the end of the episode, the hosts encourage listener participation through giveaways and promote upcoming comedy events in the Valley, maintaining the show's engaging and community-focused atmosphere.

John Holmberg [57:13]: "The Core Institute has been here for 20 years and they're going to be here for a lot longer than that. And you can stop living with pain and start saying yes to all the things I love to do."

They wrap up with light-hearted banter and updates on local entertainment, ensuring a well-rounded and entertaining conclusion to the episode.

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Notable Quotes

• Bret Vesely [03:30]: "We're like, oh, something good happening here."
• Bret Vesely [09:22]: "I'll go thank my dad today."
• Bret Vesely [24:36]: "If you're listening right now, Peoria guy, hang yourself today."
• Bret Vesely [15:14]: "I think he twinking around."
• Bret Vesely [17:52]: "He didn't just accidentally pick up Divine Brown."

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Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully blends humor, shock value, and cultural commentary, engaging listeners with a mix of light-hearted banter and serious discussions. From dissecting the latest TV show twists to condemning animal cruelty and speculating on celebrity relationships, John Holmberg and his co-hosts ensure that their audience remains entertained and informed throughout the morning hours.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Dick Toledo]

It's Dick Toledo from Holberg's morning sickness for game day men's health. I did my free consultation with game day back in November because I was experiencing a lack of energy and focus. Now, nearly six months later, I'm feeling like my old old self again. Go to gameday phoenix.com today and book a free consultation in a matter of minutes at game day's in house lab. A licensed game day clinician will draw your blood, run some tests and formulate a plan to incorporate any number of these therap to help you get back in the game. You can battle the clock of aging and it starts today at one of the 11 game day men's health locations in the valley@gameday phoenix.com Come on down.

[John Holmberg]

To the Ranch House Grill. Comfort food is your next meal. Pork chili verde, chicken fried steak. Ranch House knows you'll think it's great. Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House grill has been voted best breakfast four years in a row.

[Brett Vesely]

We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions.

[John Holmberg]

Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven.

[Brett Vesely]

Days a week, 6am to 2pm We're a family restaurant with a small town.

[John Holmberg]

Atmosphere serving southwestern comfort food for 18 years.

[Brett Vesely]

Come on down to the Ranch House.

[John Holmberg]

Grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix at 56th street and Thomas Road.

[Brett Vesely]

You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself.

[John Holmberg]

He's evil sitting right here.

[Brett Vesely]

Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. There you go. Thank you. Miles to nowhere. Katie and Hobbs, they dropped off shirts that they were selling over there for themselves. They have their. Their merch. And they dropped off our make your cock rise with the sun shirts. They're good shirts too, so thanks. They said that if you mentioned KPD, you get $10 off. And I'm like, unless that shirt is now $5, you're overcharging for shirts. I'm just saying you can't charge 40 bucks for that at all. By the way, there was a moment on television last night that would have been back in the days when we all had things in common or commonalities or, you know, social connection because of entertainment. None of you guys watching the last of us. No, I haven't been shocked by TV in a long time. Probably Game of Thrones Was the last one. Oh, man. Don't. Don't read forward. Didn't expect it. Although if you watch, if you play the game, the Last of Us. Evidently this was something that should have happened a long time ago. Crazy twist. I didn't see it. I thought that. I didn't see that coming. This would be something we'd all be talking about. But we don't have commonality anymore because we're all.

[Larry McFeely]

And it's the second episode.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brett Vesely]

Or second episode of second season. Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

I got to get.

[Brett Vesely]

First season's great. This. But the gap between the first season and the second season is I have. I don't remember a thing that happened. I'm confusing it with a fallout. I've got all these other post apocalyptic shows that have popped in and out of my life and I'm like, I can't remember who's. What, what's going on. What's a firefly? I don't remember any of it. And then the big mushroom people. I don't remember them. It was all a mess.

[Larry McFeely]

I turned on the recap. Started yesterday.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

And about a minute in the recap. Watch it.

[Brett Vesely]

There's nothing you can do. I don't remember a single thing. But man, oh, man. At the end. Yeah. My buddy Reggie just says, all of us game nerds knew this was coming. Just didn't know when it showed up yesterday. But this is that thing. We're like, oh, something good happening here.

[Larry McFeely]

Like the Red Wedding in the.

[Brett Vesely]

The Red Wedding was like the theme of Thrones. That. Yeah, that. That cinched it for most people who are kind of. Look. Initially the character Sean Bean played, the king, Ned Stark, gets killed. He was the star of the show. Yeah. And he gets killed in the first a season. You know, like they killed off. The main guy would be like on Three's Company if John Ritter just got slaughtered in the first season. You're like, what are they gonna do? They didn't replace him. They just moved on to another apartment.

[Larry McFeely]

They're not gonna do the.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, oh, my God. So that kind of was last night. You're like, oh, this is. This is. But all the gamers knew. They knew the whole time. Yeah. Now I see. I want to talk about all the things people who know are texting. So you got to have this little quiet. It's almost like, you know, like you're having a TV affair. You've got to have these, like quiet conversations on the side from all these other people or you get yelled at. So I can't. But Just know that if you're watching it, you missed. Last Night is a good one. And it brought me back. I was done with it. Like, I can't follow. I'm not smart enough to watch TV anymore. There's too much time in between series that I. And I don't do recaps if it's. I don't remember it. It must not be that great. And then I started to kind of fade out. I was playing a little game with my phone, and then I'm like, this got interesting fast. I'm like, oh, right. And it all kind of washed back. Like, I remember what's going on now. The hospital. The Salt Lake Hospital. Then it starts to add up, and then, boom. They hit you over the head with something. That's pretty cool. The most memorable part of season one of the Last of Us is the. The Ron Swanson from Parks and Rec beard kissing some other guy for five or six minutes, and they're like, all right, I get it. They're in love. And then they have a sex scene, and you're like, all right, I get it there. Love. And then they do it again, like, okay, I get it.

[Larry McFeely]

Swanson, knock it off.

[Brett Vesely]

Somebody please stop mouth. Ron Swanson. I enjoy Parks and Rex. Ron Swanson. I can't picture him with a wiener in his mouth. Please stop it. Let alone locking beards with a fella.

[Larry McFeely]

Get it? They had a good thing going as.

[Brett Vesely]

A newly minted gay of the last. Probably, like, what's been four years I've been gay now.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know if I'll go with newly minted. I mean, it seems like, you know, it's.

[Brett Vesely]

Look, the announcement is no longer.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, I don't think you can say that.

[Brett Vesely]

I think I can, because I'm still. I'm still platinum. I still haven't tongue kissed a guy I've lipped to lipped with a fella just as a joke. But I did that before I announced.

[John Holmberg]

We'Re on Grinder Guy.

[Brett Vesely]

And I was on Grindr for a little bit, but I'm still pristine. But I will tell you that. So. Yeah, but gone. I was gonna say, the longer I'm gay, the more I realize what I like and don't like. And it's whittling it down like I'm. It's gonna. It's. It's a tall order. I'm gonna die an old gay maid. Because watching two dudes with beards kiss each other, that's right out. That's. That's right out. So Much of my mustache and goatee attached to yours. Oh, it's just. It's everything I've tried to avoid with Italian girls. It's just wrong. So that's how. But Ron Swanson taking all that meat in that one episode is what I remember most from season one. And it was a total, like, diversion. Everything's going apocalyptic, crazy. We gotta save this kid. And then episode four or five, there's two guys with full beards. Not even, like, beards like mine. Not patchy, awful beards. Like full super Grizzly Adams beards. And they are like tongue. You can see their tongues shoot out of the corners of their mouths a little bit and touch. And it's like, I can't. There's too much hair. I mean, the reason in the 70s.

[Larry McFeely]

Like, the settings of, like, the Waltons and Little house area where they're, you.

[Brett Vesely]

Know, their city got blown out. This guy was a doomsday prepper, and he did it right. And then they had a city no one cared about. He fenced it off. He electrified it. It was their own utopia. And the other guy finds it. But remember 70s and 80s playboys. Yeah, yeah. There's a reason dudes don't want to kiss dudes with hair. We don't want to kiss girls with hair down there. We made you. We somehow or another fooled you ladies into thinking that was a great idea and you all fell in. You being smooth down there, ladies. That wasn't your decision. That was not your decision, I think. And we have. Brett, our fathers are the ones to thank for this. They were the age, the bushmasters. Yeah, yeah. The ones that plowed through there and said, I will eat no more forever. Like they were our dad's generation. Brett, are the ones who said, this ends today. No son of mine's ever going to have a mouthful of that again. Years prior to that, your dad. The generations before your dad said, ah, hair pie. Like he was against it. It was, I'm never going down there. Sprouts are disgusting. And they never. Your mother's generation, Brady there, they never knew the glories of oral sex unless they were with some hobo who was unafraid of their. Whatever's going on down there. Then the 70s and 80s ladies just started, hey, we're going to keep it this way. And I think our. Our dads, men in their 60s and 70s, the Vietnam guys, they're the ones that said, that's it. Shave it or we're done here.

[John Holmberg]

They were in the weeds for us.

[Brett Vesely]

They were in the they. They were in the rice paddies just shooting down like crazy. Yeah, Charlie, don't eat, they said. And they just stopped. And then moms had to talk to their daughters. If you ever want real pleasure, you can't be like your mother. Learn from your mother. Your father just won't go down there. It's because it's just this sponge of gross that I keep above my honeyhole.

[John Holmberg]

Well, it seemed like they started with the strips, and then, yeah, you know.

[Brett Vesely]

We told them, little stash up top. And then, I can't do this. I can't do this anymore. And they got together in a group, the men of the 80s and early 90s, and said, that's it. What do we do? How do we make this world better for our sons? And somehow or another, they talked him into it. And it's holding. It's holding strong, boys.

[John Holmberg]

I'll go thank my dad today.

[Brett Vesely]

You know what?

[John Holmberg]

Thank him.

[Brett Vesely]

If you're lucky enough to still have your father and he's 78 or younger, you go in and thank him for taking all those hair bullets for us, all that protesting. Hey, hey.

[Larry McFeely]

Ho, ho.

[Brett Vesely]

That hair has got dirt. I don't remember them marching on Washington or anything. The protest signs, Fuzzy Bush must die. What are they doing? They're never going to go down there again. The Trip Reeves of the world. You know, Tripp was going, num, num, num. All right, I'm done here. Mop this mess up, or I'm never going down there again. I will eat no more forever. And then he walked away. A peaceful protest. And the ladies are like, well, I need that. And they. And they changed. They act like they did it because it was their decision, but tell me why you would do that, ladies, if it weren't for us.

[Larry McFeely]

There were little waves of movement going the other way. It just.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, well, they'll try every once in a while. And you're like, no. And what happens to those ladies that they get a tan on their ring finger on their left hand? Because it's. It's a display.

[Larry McFeely]

Those armpits.

[Brett Vesely]

You want to keep that thing natural, you're going to die like Charles Barkley, ringless. Nobody stay in there anyway. I don't know where I was going with that, but I just remember I had a story. I had a more important movement I didn't realize we needed to thank. And an entire generation of men who fought up to the Clinton administration through all that yuck. So we didn't have to. And look at us now. Worst case scenario, you get like a buzz cut down there. Right? Like in pictures and porns and stuff. Worst case still, it's like. Even still, it's like, hey, seem a little late.

[John Holmberg]

I go to the next video. Yeah, there's more choices out there.

[Brett Vesely]

It just looks like you got up late. Yeah. You didn't. Why is this not manicured? Oh, I got up late. 5:00 clock. I got a little shot. Yeah, it's like kissing Homer Simpson. I'm not doing this. Oh, right. I was talking about the last of us and Ron Swanson taken in the mouth. That's right. That's exactly right. Remember the protest signs, John? God hates follicles. God hated it. Why he put it there, we don't know. I remember my girlfriend, and it was 1994. She was still kind of. It was. That was the years when it was like, what are we doing? Are we doing this? Are we all doing this?

[John Holmberg]

Or is like, that was still the landing strip days.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, that started. Landing strips and stuff like that. And I said, you need to. Let's just get rid of it all. Reluctantly, she went into the bathroom and did exactly that and came back out. And I was like, nope, can't do it. It's like, why? I'm like, I don't know. It's like a. You're like a kid now.

[Larry McFeely]

Adjusting to the high condition.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, it was HD. It was a way up close 4k. It's like dropping a tomato on the ground and picking it up and you're like, I don't like, something's wrong with this. You cut a tomato in half and just place it on someone, it looks just like one. Especially when it's not. And for years, I was used to the shrubbery. It's like when you move into a new house and it's a new building, you don't have landscaping yet. It just looks funny. The house looks into the trees. Everything's got to fill in or you get used to it and you go, xeriscape. And that's what we did. We did the Xeriscape and we like it. It's better that way. That's how you know your wife hates you.

[John Holmberg]

Just lets it go.

[Brett Vesely]

Lets it go. That's worse than sweatpants.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Anyway, we can we see. These are the things we have to talk about now because we can't unite over popular television shows because there's too many people who don't know what's going on. Haven't seen it, watching it. Episodes behind. Didn't see last night. Yet crazy stuff. Morning sickness medicate KU PD it's Larry McFeely.

[Dick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

All right, HMS podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get up north to Desert Ridge to see comedy sets from Leo Gonzalez and Tempe at the Improv. You've got Randy Feldface performing. Just Google it. And you're gonna have to go see for yourself on that one. And downtown at Standup Live, the very funny Gary Owen entertains you all this week. For the complet lineups and for tickets go to standuplive.com Desert Ridge, improv.com and.

[Dick Toledo]

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[Brett Vesely]

And yesterday was the, you know, the resurrection day. Yeah, but there was no I personally don't think there's ever been Jesus included a more impressive resurrection than what I saw yesterday on the news and looking at right now is that Elizabeth Hurley is dating Billy Ray Cyrus.

[Larry McFeely]

That's a power couple.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, talk about resurrection around. Yeah, I don't know if he's twinking around.

[John Holmberg]

I thought that was a rumor. Seriously?

[Larry McFeely]

Oh no, no. Billy Raispin.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

With a little Nas X. That's what I heard.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, no, they were. They were singing together.

[John Holmberg]

I know that, but that's that I knew they just one Brett's saying is.

[Brett Vesely]

There'S no reason to hang out with little Nas X unless you're twinking.

[John Holmberg]

Right?

[Brett Vesely]

And that's. We go back to that hair conversation. Billy Ray is basically a 70s vagina with teeth.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe it's a cover up, but there's.

[Brett Vesely]

Elizabeth Hurley, who still, despite her age, looks pretty great and could get most any guy in her age bracket that she wants. And she's decided to resurrect Billy Ray Cyrus into the world of like. Like where guys are envious of him somehow.

[Larry McFeely]

Well, you've had a tough run.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, he hasn't last couple years since Achy Breaky Heart.

[Larry McFeely]

Especially with his family, you know, and.

[Brett Vesely]

His daughter became a billionaire, doesn't want to talk to him. That's the worst thing you can do to a dad. And they're kind of on terms or kind of not. He was helpful with Hannah Montana. He was on it. And then. And the sister's no big fan of Billy Ray's. They. They dismissed Billy Ray like we did. And someone or another. Elizabeth Hurley's like, hey, you want to be? You would have asked me 48 hours ago. Here are three people you can switch lives with, and Billy Ray Cyrus was one of them. He'd be the last on the list no matter who the other two were. There's three guys you can switch lives with. Billy Ray, he's out. Who's next? Like, that's. Now Billy Ray's back in that envy category. He had a hit song in the early 90s. He made a ton of money. He's got some Hannah Montana money. And now he's boning Elizabeth Hurley, who still looks really good. Did not see that. So. And he kind of looks like Jesus. Now on Easter to find out this news that Billy Ray and Jesus have similar look. And he's risen from the dead so much further than Christ ever did. I'm less impressed with Jesus moving that rock than I am with Billy Ray banging Elizabeth Hurley.

[John Holmberg]

Something's wrong with Elizabeth Hurley. She made Hugh Grant at his peak get blown by a black tranny hooker.

[Brett Vesely]

All right. That's why I bring these topics up. That's a solid debate. You bring me back to reality and say, oh, wait, that's right. Hugh Grant at the peak of his powers, dated Elizabeth Hurley at the peak of her powers.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Was that Austin Powers? That was a little before the Austin Powers. Awfully close, though. And she was. There may have been nobody prettier in the 90s than Elizabeth Hurley. She was insane. But that's an excellent point there to say that her boyfriend went out and grabbed and he could have gotten anybody he wanted at the time. Hugh Grant was the foppish, you know, British gentleman that could have just gone out to a, hello, love, how are you? Would you like to go back to my car and blow me? And most everyone would have said yes, but instead he paid some transactional drugs. Was it a tranny or was it just a hooker?

[John Holmberg]

I thought it was a tranny, but let me look.

[Larry McFeely]

I thought it was a hook.

[Brett Vesely]

It was the best thing that ever happened to Jay Leno's career because he was losing a letterman that had just started in like, 94. And he turned to first question he had for Hugh Grant when he came on the show, like six months later. What the hell are you thinking? And then the world blew up and Leno was number one from there on out. That very moment was Jay Leno's best. Like, that just launched him into the number one category in the late night talk show. Was it a training or was it.

[John Holmberg]

No, it doesn't look like it. Divine Brown.

[Brett Vesely]

Divine Brown, that's right.

[John Holmberg]

Even got. Even got her own Wikipedia page, right?

[Brett Vesely]

Divine Brown. That's right. Because it wasn't so much that a celebrity got a hooker, it was that Elizabeth Hurley was his other option.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

And he said, no, thank you, I'm going out for smokes.

[John Holmberg]

This was his other option.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, that's Divine Brown.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

That's a picture of Divine Brown. Estelle Marie Thompson. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Although Adam's apple's looking pretty large there. So I don't know.

[Brett Vesely]

You know what, Elizabeth? I'm gonna go ahead. You continue that bath and try to scrub that stink off. I'll be right back. I'm gonna go get an Orange Julius or something. He pulled over and got Divine Brown. And you know, the thing that I think we all realized in that was that Hugh Grant's. That wasn't the first and only time he was. He didn't just accidentally pick up Divine Brown. That's the time he got caught.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

There were probably, I'm gonna guess, a thousand other prostitutes that he had picked up.

[Larry McFeely]

And how many laters, how many years later was the Eddie Murphy thing?

[Brett Vesely]

Eddie was around the. Say, Eddie still denies that that was it. He said he was giving somebody a ride home.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

And that was one that was right in the time when prostitutes and we're all kind of hopping in cars.

[John Holmberg]

Elizabeth didn't, like, give mouth hugs.

[Brett Vesely]

That could be.

[John Holmberg]

That's probably what it was.

[Brett Vesely]

She was holding strong on that whole thing. Our dads tried to stop and she was keeping it fuzzy.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, man.

[Brett Vesely]

You know, there's a movement now. Elizabeth, you know, even Divine shaves hers. Anyway, this one says you have to appreciate a woman that's clean shaven, especially if it looks like a double meat Arby sandwich, because it takes time to shave that. That's true, David. You know what? We need to give credit to all those girls that aren't blessed with beautiful ones that have to work the nooks and crannies. You know who else we need to give credit to? Because back in the 90s, this wasn't a thing. Every strip mall back in the 90s did not have a place with somebody willing to pour hot wax on your genitals and rip off all that hair and take a look at God knows. Do you think gynecologists have it bad? At least a gynecologist can say something's wrong with it. The lady at the wax place can't. She just has to grin and bear at the smell. Oh, and she chose to do that for a living. Ripping wax out of big money. Big old money. Roll over. I'll do your butt. Did you wash today? And then you got the Lady Brady's out there? I got a bidet. It's clean enough. Like, ah, you're a rust butt. And I gotta pull off all your hair. Did you shower after your last turd? I cleaned it with some wet wipes. Oh, Lady Brady and you. But bacon strips. It's good enough to just get to tugging. Oh, crap. We got to give those ladies some awards, too. And some men, I guess, if they're doing. But the ones that look at all those, it ain't all pristine down there for most of those ladies. And if you're going to a service to get that done, there's a lot of times like I can't get in the creases. I can't reach. You're gonna have to do that. Between this flap and that flap and then this overhang, I can't get a razor in there. And so somebody else has to. You gotta farm that out. Anyway, you guys should watch the Last of Us. It's pretty great. It's really great, actually. Oh, I hasten to do this next thing. I don't think I want. I don't think I want to, but.

[John Holmberg]

What's wrong?

[Brett Vesely]

Shame. We got one Shame. And I'm predicting this is the winner. Shame. Yeah. This is the winner. A sinner comes before you and begged for forgiveness. It's time for the Frank Caliendo Nathan Sutherland. Oof. This is a tough one. Heel of the year award nominee. Give great shame. Shame. An animal abuse investigation is underway as a man was caught on camera beating a chihuahua to death with a shovel in Peoria. They walk amongst us. These people are our neighbors. Oh. Officials say the man in the video claimed he intended to just smack the dog in the butt using the shovel, but the dog turned and was hit in the head instead. The man claims he was acting in self defense Chihuahua that to protect his cats and chickens. After the dog got into the yard, the lady who lost their dog so she couldn't believe someone would do this to an animal. I'm shocked. I feel immediate disgust. And I can't believe someone is capable of doing something so awful. The sheriff's office responded to the 911 call in the video provided by the neighbors. They're still investigating the incident. So no names have been released. But just know this man, that's the only time I'm like, good. I'm glad there's cameras everywhere. When his name is released. Is definitely the front runner for the worst act you could. A chihuahua. You can move one, they bite and their bites hurt, but it's not life threatening. And if. And by the way, shame your chickens are, if they can't handle a chihuahua, they deserve to die. There isn't a chicken alive out there that if a chihuahua fight is something that they're gonna make it through, then that chicken wasn't long for this world anyway.

[Larry McFeely]

You could even, you know, scoot them out of the way with the, with the shovel. You could need a full swing.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, you can. Yeah. The shovel can be used as a deterrent, a barrier. Certainly don't even need to be touched with it. But this C word and you know, I just wanted to hit him in the butt. But you clanked him in the head so hard it killed him. You weren't hitting him in the butt. Very soft. So to that son of a bitch, if you're out there right now and I say this and hope it actually happens, most of the time my words are idle and float out there and mean nothing. If you're listening right now, Peoria guy, hang yourself today. The world will be better off without you. Self defense from a chihuahua. You can catch it. It's like self defense from a pillow Chihuahua. If you can't if you bend over, it's gonna run away. If it's coming at you hot, take a couple of shots in the hands. You're gonna make it. And then you just move them into another room and you lock it and say, who the hell's Chihuahua is acting like an asshole? Hit it with a shovel. You have to go get the sh. That is horrifying. And evidently there is the videotape being analyzed right now to make sure that this dude was the dude they're talking to and they're gonna arrest him and throw a name out. The second they throw that name out, I'm gonna make him front runner. I mean, he's the. At the quarter poll of the year. He is definitely gonna be our. He's our leader. We haven't had anything close to this. And last year's winner was another guy who beat up a dog on the street. Remember?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I can't remember his name.

[Brett Vesely]

Son of a bitch. I don't want to remember his name. I liked when the s. Heel of the year award was kind of fun. You know, like neighbors that did terrible. Like those paradise and Pearl up at Fry's who grifted, grifted. That mentally retarded boy in the parking lot. Took his credit cards and his wallet and his money. And then the. The city could react by giving the retarded kids some love and shaming paradise and Pearl as we should have. Paul Manchaka Jr. Sorry, senior. I always have to remember the junior part because your life's miserable now. Was the one who hired all those online nurses to come wipe his ass. And he played. Pretended to be a retard dead person. And he would crap himself. And the ultimate commitment to the role. And then these ladies would come by for 19 bucks and wash his ass. And then one got wise to it and saw him Kaiser Sosey out of a house and walk down the road just totally normal and called the police. Paul Manchaka Jr. Nobody was really injured in this. But he walks amongst us. We've had a few of those. Nathan Sutherland is the one we named it. I know people were as horrifying. We got him terrible human being. But his victim was already a victim.

[Larry McFeely]

Still wanted to be a responsible father.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know what he wanted to be. He's a good husband. Horrible human being. But this. This smashing Chihuahuas with shovels. I would like to. I'll volunteer for Humane Society. Animal welfare. Anybody who wants a pet project. Anybody wants to get me involved, I will be the. I'll throw the hood on and you can put him in a chair and I'll swing the shovel at him and say, whoopsie. Meant to hit you in the bottom. Edwards Morning Sickness 98 KUPD Spring is.

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[John Holmberg]

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[Brett Vesely]

Morning Sickness so unnamed. Man, this story that I just wants to make me vomit all over the place.

[John Holmberg]

Those other jerks that left that, that dog go in the middle of the.

[Brett Vesely]

Desert and said bye in their video. Yeah, yeah. I don't want, I don't want any more of the dog or kid hurting things. You know that. These are the ones you don't want walking amongst you, but they walk amongst us. This guy was at the grocery store with you. If you live in Peoria, there's a chance this guy was at the gas station right next to you. Never know when you're standing next to one of these piles of garbage and they're out there. Keep your eyes open. But any man fighting off a chihuahua with a shovel, I think he's too weak to be on our planet. If chihuahuas scare him to the point of grabbing a weapon, then we need to end him. This, this planet sits too dangerous for you. Imagine what he'd do with like a Labrador coming at him. Break out a bazooka, for crying out loud. It's too Much weapon for such a. And look. And I'm. Chihuahuas bite a lot of people. They're the number one bite dog in the. In the system. Nobody's ever been killed by one or hit so hard that they're like, well, I had to lose my foot. You're going to go through a little pain if Chihuahua bites you. If he's scared because they're little. They're only. They're tiny little guys. Their only response is to go, ah, I'm an easy mark. I have to fight back faster. You know, it's like. It's like Irish people. They fight faster because they're so small and useless. Chihuahua's little. They fight before they think. They know they can't win many battles, so they usually throw the first blow. A shovel. Come on. What happens if a coyote gets in that guy's yard? He's just going to burn the neighborhood down. These chicken people. The least of your concerns is a rogue Chihuahua in the neighborhood killing your flock. How many terribly weak chickens? He's got a whole backyard of bird flu. If a Chihuahua is a threat anyway, I'll be the one that hits him. There is no redemption. I do not forgive. To quote Corey Taylor, I'm not Jesus. I will not forgive. I will whack you in the face with a shovel. And I hope you live and I hope you go a little R word. And then I hope you meet paradise and pearl and you get your wallet stolen. I hope it's all full circle. But he is today's nominee for the Seal of the Year. Frank Caliendo. Nathan Sudlow Ness Heel of the Year. They walk amongst us. Shame. Shame. Shame. Them if you know them. Shame if you know his name tell it to me. Shame.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, that guy was swinging for the fence.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah. You can't. You know, and it's probably not just, yeah, he took a good old.

[Larry McFeely]

I'm doing what I can.

[Brett Vesely]

Tiger wood swing.

[Larry McFeely]

Taking it out.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, he's clearing it. Terrible human being. Oh, and all my emails kept coming. Oh, my God.

[Larry McFeely]

What if it was a hand?

[Brett Vesely]

This guy. This guy says I need to see the video before making judgments. Just because his things aren't important to anyone else doesn't mean they aren't. Okay. Come on. That's true in a certain regard, but killing a Chihuahua and moving a Chihuahua? Pretty easy. How would he feel if his chicken got on somebody else's property and somebody just, you know, punted it across the thing and said it was trying to attack my Chihuahua? No, you just move the chicken you pick up the Chihuahua. This is an easy fix. Shovel unnecessary is what I'm saying. And when you claim self defense, you lose. You lose the argument of I was trying to protect my words. It's a Chihuahua. Where are the palm?

[Larry McFeely]

He was clamped onto the bird still, right?

[Brett Vesely]

You can move.

[Larry McFeely]

Grab the bird right back in.

[Brett Vesely]

You can move them and you're gonna take a shot. If a Chihuahua and a chicken are in a fight, you're probably gonna. You're gonna end up with a cut on you. It's like reaching into a thorn bush.

[Larry McFeely]

Good chance you have gloves.

[Brett Vesely]

And I know for a fact, Brady, that the chicken and the Chihuahua were not intertwined in a battle. Because he wouldn't use the shovel if he loved that chicken so much. Because run the risk of knocking the chicken cold. Especially if his aim was the butt and he took its head off. He's a horrible human being. I'd like to make a law that says there's no self defense from a Chihuahua. You can't ever use the word self defense. Chihuahua. Raging angry Chihuahua came flying at me. I was laying on the ground and he went for my jugular. What were you doing on the ground? That's none of your business. It's just raging Chihuahua flew across there. I didn't see him coming through the high grass and there he was. I was face to face with death. So I, I step away and say the reason I had to kill that Chihuahua was because I was in fear for my life. Well, then you don't need to be here anymore.

[Larry McFeely]

Attacked by a pack.

[John Holmberg]

12.

[Brett Vesely]

All right. Even, even then a shovel's too much. That's scary. If 12 United Chihuahuas charged you and only you. Horrifying. It's like those little tiny dolls in Barbarella. I don't know if anybody remembers that reference, but they had those metal teeth and they would attack. Barbarella just got cut up because there were like a lot of them. But she could just basically kick him out of the way. You should be able, I'd say, I'm sure.

[Larry McFeely]

I mean, just if you said four, four Chihuahuas are attacking me.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

I'm still not really intimidated.

[Brett Vesely]

I'm going to tell you that. I'm going to guess 15. When you get up to 15 United Angry Chihuahuas, then you got some trouble in your hands. You might have to take one down. But even still, I think I could get through. I'm pretty sure I could get through 15 angry Chihuahuas in it. Locked in a room with them. Yeah, I think I'm Gonna find out how to handle the Chihuahua situation. And there's probably two or three of them that are just shaken in the corner that aren't mad like, but if.

[Larry McFeely]

They were like the, you know, the Carabinoag and. Yeah, well, that's jumping at the throat. I think it have skills.

[Brett Vesely]

Right again.

[Larry McFeely]

Then that might be scary.

[Brett Vesely]

Magic Chihuahua. Now you're just talking like a child's imagining. Billions of trillion. It's not a thing. If it had leaping powers to get 5ft 7 inches to my neck from its Chihuahua base, I'd still bat it out of the air like a fly. Any Chihuahua jumping at me, I think I've got enough head movement to get out of there. One Chihuahua. I'm winning that fight 9,000 times. Out of 9,000 times. Two Chihuahuas. I'm taking a punch. I'm probably gonna get bit in the ankle while I'm working on one of them. And mainly just from shock. Why are these Chihuahuas so mad at me? You get three, four, five Chihuahuas. I'm still winning that fight. I'm still getting out of there pretty much unscathed. Might have a. I'd be laughing so hard like, what did I do to anger The Chihuahua population 15. 15 is my number where I could. I could. I'm still not in a life 15.

[Larry McFeely]

You're. You're. You're still eventually going to have to open your hands.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's the thing.

[Larry McFeely]

If I've got so many. But you're going to have to.

[Brett Vesely]

One of them. One of them taking a grab. Here's the other thing. If I've got chickens and I wander into my coop and there are multiple Chihuahuas angrily cornering my chickens, I think a hose does more than anything else. I think I can hold down.

[Larry McFeely]

I'd be more intimidated if it was five angry roosters. Well, even on the chickens, just because of the talon part.

[Brett Vesely]

There was very close to an incident with Cam Scatter Boo. I was. I went golfing with them again on Saturday morning. By the way, mistakes were made on my part. Doug Hopkins has decided he wants to be a golfer. And I said I'll. I'll try to get back in the game because I'm terrible at it. I've just dreadfully bad at. Right now. I don't really want to golf, but I kind of. Yeah, it's been a couple of times out. Last time out, the guy that we hang out with through this Frank. Big, big dude. 390 pound Frank is Cam Scatter Boo's friend. And that's how we ended up becoming this foursome of guys trying to figure this out. They're on the golf course at Mesa Country Club, and big Frank and Cam go wandering over. And from behind a tree, a goose that probably weighs about a hundred pounds, forty pounder, opens its wings. And you just hear, and this thing is chasing Frank. And look, Frank's 390. He's not running fast. He's not getting on. Scatter boo. Boom. You can't knock Scatter Boo down. Low center of gravity. Good contact point. This kid knows how to dodge Frank, though. No, no. So he first move Frank had was to lift his club back like he was going to kill the goose, like, stop. And it was just protecting some eggs or something, but its wings went out. And then you second guess.

[Larry McFeely]

It's intimidating.

[Brett Vesely]

It scares you. But even Frank had the wherewithal, being from me to you, Brady, a couple feet away from this goose when it just kind of shocked him. And he had the better judgment not to club the goose, just to recognize, if I get out of here, all the goose is doing is yelling at me. It's basically, it's an old lady screaming, get off my lawn. It was hilarious. Because when you're 60ft from that and you see the goose before they do and its wings go out before the honk, and you're like, oh, Frank's about to get killed by that goose. And then you see a man. Look, there might not be anything funnier on this planet than a 390 pound, 6 foot, 7 inch man running from a goose. I challenge you to close your eyes and think of that, even if you're driving. It's hilarious. And he's dressed up in bright colors because he's golfing. And then you take Heisman Trophy candidate standing next to him. I mean, it's a Fellini film. What's going on?

[Larry McFeely]

He's high. Stepping in his bad birdie shirt, right?

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know if those were high steps. More if it was just like, fee, fi, fo, fum should have been coming out of his mouth. It was pretty funny. But even Frank, the lumbering giant, didn't try to kill the goose with his club. 15 is the number that I'll accept that you that you went crazy. And then you have to ask yourself, what have I done?

[Larry McFeely]

Chihuahuas. Self defense.

[Brett Vesely]

Why am I in this? Why do Chihuahuas hate me so much? All of them.

[John Holmberg]

There's literally six emails coming in asking if Tactical black has defense against Chihuahuas. Or maybe something Jay needs to look into.

[Brett Vesely]

It's basically Giggle and go, aww, they're mad. And that's pretty much where it ends. And then bend down and pet one and the rest of them come. They're grumpy little dogs again. They're the Irish of dogs. They've got a small man's complex. Big mouth, big mouth. They won't shut up. Most of them kind of have dumb heads. If you put mick hats on chihuahuas, it would look just like one. Look if you got a chihuahua today. It's a shame they're Mexican because we should have them be called them ochihuahuas or something. We just put a little hat on them. You put a little hat on when it looks just like the logo for the fighting Irish. They may be leprechauns, but you get to 15 Chihuahuas before you have to actually do something. And even then, I think I could sit down and calm them. I go to that lost her home pet rescue, and I've been in a room with chihuahuas like five of them at once. And a couple of them didn't like me, but they stay away. Like, the ones that don't like it just end up shaking and standing in a corner and barking at you.

[Larry McFeely]

Fifteen cob chihuahuas. Those are the bigger ones.

[Brett Vesely]

They're a little thicker still. Be all right. And all of them, I mean, would have to be a chihuahua conspiracy. That one would have to talk all like the Hitler of chihuahuas would have to talk them all into this plan. Barry Holmes. Here's the plan. I'm the leader of the chihuahuas and from here on out, we hate that guy. All of us. There are no exceptions. If we see him, we attack. Any questions You. But what if we are afraid? We are no longer afraid. Do not shake and do that weird chihuahua thing. What's the worst he can do? We're chihuahuas. We're gonna win this no matter what. Holmberg's morning sickness medicate K u p D It's John Holmberg here. Time to talk about TV's Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and doughhopkins.com TV's Doug Hopkins. He has built and established his brand and company in a way that just has no competition. Doug's been here for a long time. He set the stand for over 25 years and he just keeps getting better. And that said, if you want to sell your house for cash to Doug as is, he'll make you that offer. Start the process online. Doughns.com or listen to the Doug Hopkins singers. It's John Holberg here for the amazing people at the Core Institute. Twenty years ago the Core Institute began and it's a better way of caring for people and there are a lot of people who are coping with pain in their bodies every day. The Core Institute specializes in helping the pain disappear. And I speak from experience. Here I am now living pain free and enjoying all the things I absolutely love to do. So if you're living in pain, you don't have to anymore. The Core Institute has been here for 20 years and they're going to be here for a lot longer than that. And you can stop living with pain and start saying yes to all the things you love to do. Go to the Core Institute.com Fisher Tools.

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[Brett Vesely]

Holmberg's morning sickness. Speedy, you in? I'm totally in. We're going to do this. We've always hated that guy.

[John Holmberg]

How about you slowpoke?

[Brett Vesely]

I think maybe I'll sit in the back and watch for a little bit and see how it unfolds. It's done. Such a great idea to attack him. He has a trouble. Yeah, I just, I just don't. I don't think that self defense for one chihuahua is a weapon. Self defense for one chihuahua is your foot.

[John Holmberg]

Travis is reading into your story different. What I'm getting out of the Chihuahua story is that John thinks Mexicans like sucker punching people.

[Brett Vesely]

Bigotry is what I'm saying. You Mexican? Was it a Mexican that took him down or the Chihuahuas are sucker punching the guy? Look, even one Mexican stealing your chicken is not shovel worthy. It's like a. Hey, what are you doing here? Before anything else, if he charges you, Mexican charges you, you can poke at him with a shovel. That's a fully grown Mexican. A Mexican child. And I know sometimes some Mexican adults are childlike in size, but a Mexican child is in there messing around with the chicken coop. And you go in there, your first reaction isn't a bonk him in the melon. You pick him up and you struggle with them for a minute. You put them away from the chickens.

[Larry McFeely]

Stern grab to the arm.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, a Mexican child probably has something that'll cut you just like a Chihuahua's mouth. But you can pick up a Chihuahua, and if you can't, you can kind of chase him away from the chickens if he was rabid and had his mind on getting to the chickens. But, Peoria, you got a problem out there, and it's that guy. This one says, great, the Mexicans are going to riot, and rightfully so. That's their. That's their beast. We'll work on Chihuahua self defense today at Tactical Black. It's called the adorable defense. Oh, I'm going to throw up. They're all so angry. Yeah, they have an adorable seminar where small, tiny little creatures bark at you and you have to win them over. It's easy. Yeah, I've been at Lost their home with Chihuahuas multiple. My friend had five of them. Two of them didn't like me. There's always two that are like, I don't like this guy. Like, they shake in the corner. They're worried about every look. Put yourself in the shoes of a Chihuahua. Everything is huge. Everything that walks into their house is massive.

[John Holmberg]

Man, they are just like Irish.

[Brett Vesely]

They're the Irish of dogs.

[Larry McFeely]

We've got a mini German version. We got that mini schnauzer that we picked up on Saturday.

[Brett Vesely]

They're a lot bigger than a Chihuahua. Not as tough. Well, this guy's chihuahuas are like £4.

[Larry McFeely]

I know, but I've seen again, that the different breeds, the cow and all.

[Brett Vesely]

That, but for the most part, you're not getting the Chihuahua. That's.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, he's not like Teacup most of the time.

[Brett Vesely]

The biggest Chihuahua you'll run into is eight or nine pounds. You got this.

[Larry McFeely]

But he likes to be carried around like a clutch. Like you're holding, right?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, because that's what. Look, they need protection or they're in constant fear. The Irish, they're the same exact thing. In fact, if you pulled DNA out of a Chihuahua and replicated it, there's a chance you'd get an Irishman. Even science can't figure out the difference between Chihuahua DNA and the Irish. Except for Chihuahuas aren't drunk. That's the difference. But if they could get the alcohol, they'd do it.

[John Holmberg]

And they wear sombreros instead of mick hats. You know, other than that.

[Brett Vesely]

But, man, they'd look good in a mick hat. Not the Irish. None of them look good in a miquette. But the Chihuahuas would be adorable. You imagine if that came charging at you. A little mick hat Chihuahua. Oh, my God. I'm. This is. I'm gonna cry. Comes Conor McGregor, the cutest thing I've ever. He's got his Conor McGregor walk. Little Chihuahua strut. That's the cutest thing I've ever seen. I think he was gonna try to kill that chicken. He'd lost that fight. The chicken had to look at it and go, we're good. Don't worry about it. I'll take care of this. Like, one chicken didn't need a shovel to beat the Chihuahua. This son of a bitch. It's time for him to go. Shame, shame. Yeah, it's just excessive violence for the situation. It seems like a lot. I think we can all agree. What now, John? I will take all questions. What if the person in question that we don't know the name of yet is Caleb from Shriners? You think Caleb's swinging a shovel hard enough to hit anything?

[Larry McFeely]

There's.

[John Holmberg]

He'd have rolled over it.

[Brett Vesely]

That's the only Chihuahua would have had to jump onto the wheelchair. And like Caleb, Caleb was. Caleb also has an electric chair.

[Larry McFeely]

Turn around, desperate. Swinging the shovel is going to break some.

[Brett Vesely]

Caleb's going to get more hurt trying to swing a shovel at a Chihuahua than the Chihuahua. And all you've done now is infuriate the Chihuahua.

[Larry McFeely]

I'll accept that.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't even Caleb. This is how weak Chihuahua fight is. Caleb stands a chance without a shovel. Even poor, brittle Caleb gets an angry Chihuahua, leaps onto him and his little brittle bones. Chihuahua attack. Even Caleb.

[Larry McFeely]

Couple of bites. That's 32 bones broken.

[Brett Vesely]

Even Caleb. His hands will be shattered at the end. Can hold off the attack.

[John Holmberg]

I think Alec would eff it up, though.

[Brett Vesely]

Alec?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Alec probably owns a couple Chihuahuas.

[John Holmberg]

He ain't taking no mess from no Chihuahuas.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, Alec's got some girth behind him. Alec can play the kid with the hooks for hands that rides the bikes. Oh, yeah, that one beats a Chihuahua.

[Larry McFeely]

You don't need a shovel. Caleb would have thrown a blanket out, right?

[Brett Vesely]

Adorable blanket. And then just. And then the Chihuahua would have just stood there like, still not know. And then the blanket would have started to shake. A single Chihuahua fight I put. Look, it's even money. Caleb and the Chihuahua, and he's going to look like Rocky at the end of it. But I guarantee you he still wins the fight. He has logic and reasoning and a human brain to sit back and go, chihuahua fight. No one should die. This son of a bitch. I need Ian Schwartz to immediately give me Names. You have them. And I will be the first to put his name on the air in any media thing. And you can sue me later. You killed a singular Chihuahua. Caleb Shovel is a good man name, by the way, I think. Don't you? No. This is pretty sad one. So maybe Caleb has one of those little folding survival shovels. Why would he constantly. Who's attacking Caleb that he needs to carry.

[Larry McFeely]

He walked.

[John Holmberg]

Caleb's attacking now.

[Brett Vesely]

Caleb does not need a weapon. Why do you have that, Caleb? Just in case somebody tries to take us out.

[Larry McFeely]

Cute little backpack with that thing tucked in the back. And the hammers. I've had her handles coming out.

[John Holmberg]

It's like a brain.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, he's got the two in the back. You've just made the worst mistake. Stake of your life. That little cripple is well armed. For what reason? Caleb's dad's like, look, you're getting older. You should probably pack heat. It would shoot him around the world. If he pulled the trigger on a gun, that wheelchair would go backwards a thousand feet. Oh, Caleb from Shriners has emailed in. You best keep your My name out your mouth. But you're right. I would beat the F out of that Chihuahua. Yeah. See, even Caleb's not afraid of it. What if Caleb had a little folding shovel? When are you gonna be like, hey, Caleb, help me dig this post hole.

[Larry McFeely]

Never gotta take a dump digging a hole.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, because Caleb's. Ah, man, are we out in the desert again without any. Good thing. I brought my emergency hole shovel and somebody else gonna have to dig. I've seen his parents cross his legs. I watched a special about how they get Caleb and Alec ready for the. For the shoot. Still he can't cross his legs. Oh, no, no. This was years ago. They still show. You don't want to see Caleb today. Remember what happened to, like, Jerry Mathers and Leave it to Beaver when he wasn't cute or when they. They need a new one. They need a new cute one because he is late teen years of Alec.

[Larry McFeely]

Looks like he got hit by Alex.

[Brett Vesely]

A mess too. Alec was just messed up enough when he was young to be adorable. And his adorable widow blanket. He was great. He grew into, like a man and you're like, not cute. And then Caleb was the same. They still use old footage of Caleb, but I watched one where they're like his parents and he's a marvelous little guy and. But they got him ready for something and his legs are just kind of dangling off the edge of that chair. And then a dad or Somebody grabbed one of them and flopped it over the other. And I call them. Yeah, see, this is Caleb today. And it's just. You're not donating to that. He's got. He's going through an awkward phase.

[John Holmberg]

Somebody was looking up like they're.

[Brett Vesely]

Alec just looks like a bad businessman. Like you would. You'd get a loan from Alec and you'd talk later. How big was that dude's forehead? They'd paint that white so birds don't fly into it.

[Larry McFeely]

Heyday. Right there, Brett.

[John Holmberg]

What, this one?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah. No, it's not.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's today.

[Larry McFeely]

Oh, no.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah. No, that's Alec now. The. The cute Alec of years ago. Trust me, Brady, I've watched all of these.

[Larry McFeely]

And he, like, I thought he's like 20.

[Brett Vesely]

No, Alex, probably like 22 or three.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, I think he's younger there.

[Brett Vesely]

No, if it is, it's a year. The cute days of Alec were 10 years ago. Or. Yeah, the reason that Alec had to go 10 years ago and Caleb showed up was because alec wasn't cute 10 years ago. His. His window closed fast. Yeah, you could show movies on his forehead.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

But if he wheels in a room now, you're just like, oh, okay, some adult. The only way to raise money for that stuff is to make it a cute kid. And it can't be too messed up because it makes people turn the channel. I only speak from truth and experience on this one. I can't watch those sick dog videos I kill. I jump out of the second. I see the dude from Will and Grace at the aspca. I'm like, ah, lost and home. Like I can't turn it fast enough. I don't need to be reminded it's miserable. You can't have a kid too sick. He's got to be functionally ill, and he's got to be adorable. Or we're not given money. They found. They found that magic. But Caleb could fight off a Chihuahua. That's what I'm saying. Anyway, I don't know how Caleb got involved in this, but if the video's out. Oh, boy. Somebody just sent me the video. I won't watch it. Not doing it. Said the video shows him swinging at the dog and then picking his body up and throwing it over the fence like it's trash. This guy's a piece of garbage. Oh, yeah, we got to do this today, huh? Anyway, there's that. Today marks the. We're done with that guy. Screw that guy. Today marks the Doug Hopkins, $5,000 guaranteed. Giveaway for you Fest. How about that? The name that price. Doug Hopkins. One price says it all. Game. We'll give you some items on a receipt. You guess the exact price on our text in a little bit and we'll qualify you to win $5,000 at you fest. Only five people qualify standing up on stage. How about that? Or maybe six. We do one online too. We'll give you that in a little bit. Probably around 8 o' clock this morning. We'll do that and give you the. The ingredients to that thing and see what you guys can get out of it. If you guess the right price on the text, I'll tell you the first ones at Sushi Brokers. The first receipt is from Sushi Brokers. Also was a door dash, so there's a service fee and I'll even throw that in. Wow. They got a good deal. This is a good deal. This is a really good. Paid a decent price for this one here. All right, we'll get into that a little bit. We'll get that going. Brett, what do you have for the. The Wake Up Song this morning?

[John Holmberg]

All right. Wake Up Song brought to you by those lunatics over at Action Ride Shop. Man. You want something hidden, call Action Ride Shop.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, make sure that you. You want something hidden and no one follows the rules. Yeah, call Action Ride.

[John Holmberg]

Or if you want to pick yourself bike, that's. That's the only place to go. Action Ride Shop took care of you guys. Hooking 10 people up with $500 each. Those kegs. So Action Ride Shop for all your bike and snow needs. Now that snow's pretty much over. But actionrideshop.com on the list. A lot of it having to do with the Pope. God Hates Us all from Slayer, of course, is going to show up there. Mastodon. Not following. Ozzy. Fire in the sky for the Pope avenged God damn. Jesus Knows Me from Ghost. Alice in Chains. Rain When I Die for the Pope. Manson's got a new song. It's in the Air Tonight. Metallica. A Day to Remember. And then you talked about Apocalyptica and Corey Taylor. I'm Not Jesus, so.

[Brett Vesely]

That's such a great song. I love that. Let's go with Apocalyptica.

[John Holmberg]

All right.

[Brett Vesely]

Which is such a good song. I'm Not Jesus. And the Day After Easter. It's perfect. It's Apocalyptica with Corey Taylor. I Love this. It's 98 Kup. Wake him up. Hey.

[Larry McFeely]

It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually.

[Brett Vesely]

No.

[Larry McFeely]

No membership fee.

[Brett Vesely]

I've heard enough of this.

[John Holmberg]

It's Brett Vesely from Holmberg's Morning Sickness and I want to introduce you to Patrick Riley. Now Patrick Riley is your total home solutions provider where one call does it all look when it comes to H Vac, plumbing or electrical issues, their certified professional technicians deliver quality you can trust and savings you'll appreciate. Right now, Patrick Riley is a special for you guys. 1500 dollars off a new AC system install, plus up to 1100 dollars in additional rebates. They offer same day emergency services with licensed professional technicians. Check them out [e-mail] hey, what's up?

[Brett Vesely]

It's Mo and my friends at the University of Advancing Technology has been ranked the number one best college for computer science for not one, but two years in a row. Which makes total sense because UAT are always on the lookout for those who.

[John Holmberg]

Don'T just embrace technology, they live it.

[Brett Vesely]

From advancing computer science and robotics to cybersecurity, gaming and artificial intelligence, UAT is where innovation thrives. So if you're ready to lead the next tech revolution, visit uat.edu mo and don't just study tech, live it.