05-15-25 - Daniel Emails In Angry About Our Pete Rose HOF Take - Diddy Trial Has More Fireworks As New Rape Accuser Says He Had A Tootsie Roll Sized Penis

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode: May 15, 2025
Title: Daniel Emails In Angry About Our Pete Rose HOF Take - Diddy Trial Has More Fireworks As New Rape Accuser Says He Had A Tootsie Roll Sized Penis
Host: John Holmberg
Co-hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Release Date: May 15, 2025

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1. Introduction to the Episode

The episode kicks off with John Holmberg greeting listeners and setting the stage for the day's discussions. The primary topics include an angry email from a listener named Daniel concerning Pete Rose's Hall of Fame (HOF) status and explosive developments in Diddy's (Sean Combs) legal trial, particularly focusing on a new rape accusation that humorously references the accuser's description of Diddy's penis size.

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2. Listener Feedback and Pete Rose Hall of Fame Discussion

Timestamp: [02:00] – [07:10]

Key Points:

• Daniel's Frustration: A listener, Daniel, sends an angry email regarding the show's stance on Pete Rose's eligibility for the Baseball Hall of Fame, primarily due to Rose's history of betting on baseball games.

  Notable Quote:

  "Daniel, they're like five minutes later. He's listening in middle like 12 in the morning...so clearly, Daniel, with your slurs and stuff, when you've got Pete Rose dick in your hands. You guys sound like sour women."
  — John Holmberg [02:30]

• Debate on Steroids in Baseball: The hosts delve into the controversy surrounding steroid use in baseball, distinguishing between players like Pete Rose, who were involved in betting, and those implicated in steroid scandals. They discuss the integrity of baseball statistics and the impact of different eras on the game's records.

  Notable Quotes:

  "The beauty of baseball is that it's an numbers game. That's math. That cannot be, you know, changed..."
  — John Holmberg [04:26]

  "If Bonds was in Colorado, oh, sure."
  — Brady Bogen [07:10]

• Era Comparisons: The conversation extends to comparing different eras in baseball and other sports, highlighting how rule changes and advancements have transformed gameplay and statistics.

  Notable Quote:

  "Baseball has those arguments of like did they, didn't they? Is this, you can't, you can't really go back in time with football..."
  — John Holmberg [09:13]

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3. The Diddy Trial and New Accusations

Timestamp: [13:12] – [29:11]

Key Points:

• Overview of the Trial: The hosts shift focus to Sean Combs' ongoing trial, emphasizing the sensational nature of the allegations against him. A new rape accuser has emerged, providing graphic and somewhat humorous descriptions of the incident.

  Notable Quote:

  "She's complaining about a few. Day three, Johnny's in the jury...she said, oh, this isn't going to hurt."
  — John Holmberg [15:01]

• Accuser's Statements: The accuser described Diddy's genitalia as "a little bit of a Tootsie Roll," implying it was not large enough to cause significant harm during the alleged assault. The hosts critique this portrayal, debating the implications of such statements on the severity of the accusation.

  Notable Quotes:

  "She said, when I saw it, it looked like a Tootsie Roll, a little bit bigger than a Tootsie Roll. And she goes, oh, this isn't going to hurt."
  — John Holmberg [18:37]

  "Rape is rape in my book. But when she said, oh, it was a small, she called it a. She called it a. An itty bitty diddy is what she said."
  — John Holmberg [22:02]

• Sociocultural Commentary: The discussion expands to societal perceptions of size, particularly how racial stereotypes influence attitudes towards male genitalia. The hosts explore how these stereotypes play into the accuser's narrative and the broader implications for both the accuser and the accused.

  Notable Quotes:

  "You're basically saying black people have big penises. That's what you're saying."
  — Brady Bogen [25:23]

  "It's more of the act of rape than it is. But she's the one who brought up size."
  — John Holmberg [22:39]

• Humor and Sensitivity Balance: While addressing serious allegations, the hosts employ humor to discuss the details, walking a fine line between comedic commentary and sensitivity towards the subject matter.

  Notable Quote:

  "That's a rape claim. That's stand up comedy. That's a joke."
  — John Holmberg [28:30]

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4. Additional Discussions and Segments

Timestamp: [29:11] – [33:28]

Key Points:

• Humorous Skits: The episode includes comedic impressions and skits related to the trial, such as mimicking courtroom phrases and making light-hearted jokes about the accuser's statements.

  Notable Quotes:

  "You must acquit. It was baggy, like a raincoat."
  — John Holmberg [28:46]

  "Itty bitty. If it was his clothes. Itty bitty did it. Yeah. He didn't rape. Itty bitty did he?"
  — John Holmberg [28:58]

• Personal Anecdotes: The hosts share personal stories and humorous takes on conversations about penis size among colleagues, adding a relatable and entertaining layer to the episode.

  Notable Quote:

  "I call it Al Qaeda because it just ruins everything. So you're rushed? Me? Yeah."
  — John Holmberg [30:17]

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5. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Timestamp: [33:28] – [34:29]

Key Points:

• Final Advertisements: The episode wraps up with advertisements for services like AMCO and Patrick Riley, as well as a promotion for the University of Advancing Technology.

• Closing Remarks: John Holmberg sarcastically summarizes the episode's content, blending humor with the serious topics discussed.

  Notable Quote:

  "What are you doing? It's so unattractive."
  — John Holmberg [30:20]

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Summary

In this episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness, John Holmberg and his co-hosts engage in spirited debates over Pete Rose's potential induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame, contrasting it with the steroid-related controversies in sports. The discussion transitions smoothly into the high-profile Diddy trial, where a new rape accusation introduces both serious and humorously awkward elements, particularly focusing on the accuser's remarks about Diddy's genitalia. Throughout the episode, the hosts balance humor with critical commentary, offering listeners both entertainment and thought-provoking perspectives on current sports and celebrity legal matters.

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Note: This summary captures the essence of the episode's discussions, highlighting key moments and notable quotes to provide a comprehensive overview for those who haven't listened to the podcast.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Dick Toledo]

It's Dick Toledo from Holberg's Morning Sickness for Game Day Men's Health. I did my free consultation with Game Day back in November because I was experiencing a lack of energy and focus. Now, nearly six months later, I'm feeling like my old old self again. Go to gameday phoenix.com today and book a free consultation in a matter of minutes at Game Day's in House lab. A licensed Game Day clinician will draw your blood, run some tests and formulate a plan to incorporate any number of these therap to help you get back in the game. You can battle the clock of aging and it starts today at one of the 11 game day men's Health locations in the valley@gameday phoenix.com Come on down.

[Unknown]

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[John Holmberg]

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[Unknown]

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[Larry McFeely]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from AMCO. And Wayne, if my car has an extended warranty, do I have to take it back to the dealer for service?

[Wayne]

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[Larry McFeely]

It's nice to have other options.

[Wayne]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[Wayne]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[John Holmberg]

A whole lot more. Homburg's morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail. Oh, cock's broken again. Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to the morning sickness. How are you? It's 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett, there's Big Dick Toledo let's get this thing going. I'm already. I got back and forth going with people about Pete Rose yesterday. I don't know why that fired. Listen to this guy got all. He's mad. Daniel's right. Daniel, go back and forth. You can have this thought. Daniel said you and Brett are such. And then he used a slur. Homo F words. He says enough of Pete Rose cheated. He's a legend. I don't know how you're typing. So. So clearly, Daniel, with your slurs and stuff, when you've got Pete Rose dick in your hands. You guys sound like sour women. This is my biggest bitch voice. He bet on baseball. He's not supposed to do that. Now you're talking about steroids. Pete Rose didn't do steroids. Ben Roethlisberger raped people, won a title. He's a Steeler. He's cool. I typically agree with you, but this time Brady's the only one who's right. Daniel, they're like five minutes later. He's listening in middle like 12 in the morning. I feel bad for him because he's got to yell at the air. He can't just email us on the flies like in the middle of the night.

[Brady]

That's when you're gonna get some good rage too.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, you get that I'm at work at 12. I don't like my life kind of thing. You know how it is, Brett, when you fire off at people who are asleep.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Daniel, it's okay. We still care about you. But I do, I do understand your passion for. For incredible Pete Rose. He's in driving weather. Yeah, he's. Yeah, it's him leaving. I don't know.

[Brady]

Did it natural.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he wasn't on steroids. Nobody ever said that. But yeah, I agree with. Well, because people were asking, what about people who did steroids? Should they be kicked out forever, too? And I'm like, you know, we basically made the comparison that there's the steroid guys and then there's dudes who cheated the system and there's that kind of thing you do. It's a game that was based on statistics and completely tied to other eras. That was the comparison of baseball's eras is the statistics led them through so long as they were factual and fair and on an even playing field. And they weren't with steroids. And everybody knew it. So, yeah, that's a different. That's a difference maker. So you have to separate that era from the rest of them as far as records go, because the. The Whole thing about baseball is stats. I mean, it's the only. It's the only major sport where you actually are encouraged to keep score yourself. Like each pitch, like they give you a book. They don't do that in football to chart plays. That's what you do in baseball. It's a statistically based game. It's very analytical and you can manipulate.

[Brady]

This stats a little bit.

[John Holmberg]

In what way?

[Brady]

Yeah, I mean, as far as when they're keeping them in the history of baseball, like how they're keeping certain games and pitches and saves because the game has changed.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, that's not manipulating stats, that's adding statistics. You can't. It's math. Right, but that's the point. You can't manipulate the stats. A guy who hit 340, hit 340. A guy who hit 32510 years later, you can't. You can't manipulate those numbers.

[Brady]

You could, because being ruled a hit.

[John Holmberg]

Or an error, that's the trust of the game. Right. On whether or not the scorekeeper's doing.

[Brady]

His job, I'm going to give him a hit.

[John Holmberg]

All right? That's one out of every 10,000 hits that you're going to be like, oh, okay, they jobed us on that. You literally can't manipulate the math. At the end of the year, everybody agrees this is what the math was for this hitter. If there's a guy out there that says, I was robbed of 600 different hits, the human error factor of an umpire comes in on balls and strikes and whatever, that's not manipulation. That's essentially just like an agreement by both teams that there's going to be mistakes and it's going to balance out. But it's not enough to change the course of the game. If you have an umpire that's missing calls like crazy, he's fired. That's the way it should be.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, none of the quote unquote, big steroid guys have even been in the hall of Fame.

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, not the ones that, you know, the.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he's the only one. And that's more of a thing for the Dominican Republic. Yeah, I mean, but bonds, the cloud. The beauty of baseball is that it's an. At the end of the day, it's a numbers game. That's math. That cannot be, you know, changed or like, oh, but this. You can then argue which is the fun of baseball. Did this era supersede this era and who was better and whatever. And what was the pitching like then? And the baseball was you know, the mound was a little higher and, you.

[Brady]

Know, that's what I was kind of alluding to because some of the, you know those old pitchers where they're just going the entire game.

[John Holmberg]

Sure.

[Brady]

And not having a five day.

[John Holmberg]

Right. But again, closers. It was, it's. It's the advancements is not manipulation. It's different. I'm not hearing anything. Got something in your ear?

[Brady]

Do you hear that?

[John Holmberg]

No. You all right? Follow the light, Brady. Follow the light.

[Brett Vesely]

It's an alarm going off.

[John Holmberg]

It's an alarm. Yeah, that'll happen. This building has alarms. Okay. It's now. Any good?

[Brady]

I wasn't.

[John Holmberg]

Thriller might be laying in the hallway or something. Might be his Met Alert.

[Brady]

Just fire.

[John Holmberg]

Who knows? Yeah, it could be a fire. I don't know.

[Brett Vesely]

It even went to the home run records back in the day. I mean, you know, Roger Maris had more games than Babe Ruth had.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brett Vesely]

And people were, oh, it's an asterisk.

[John Holmberg]

But that's the fun of it, is that you are, like debating all because you agreed to. Statistically, each guy was even up. Then steroids came along. You're like, well, I mean, now things are completely different. Like, you have a.

[Brady]

If Bonds was in Colorado, oh, sure.

[John Holmberg]

But if you have, if you, but if you add drugs to that and you're like, this is definitely an enhancement and it is agreed upon by everyone. The reason baseball players did what they did is because this definitely enhances my performance. If it didn't, it wouldn't have run, you know, wildfire through the league. Baseball is. Baseball lost a lot when it went through that, because it was the first time. You're like, no, this is, this is actually cheating the game. 70 home runs fairly easily was cheating the game. Then you get a guy like Aaron Judge who does, you know, his 62, and it's kind of regarded as the real record because you're pretty sure he did that legitimately. It's a huge man.

[Brady]

I wonder what was the year that, you know, between football and baseball? They said, all right, let's start testing.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I mean, yeah, it's got to be, what, mid-70s or when you started. I mean, steroids.

[Brady]

It's been around for a while.

[John Holmberg]

There's a blind eye in football to steroids, for sure.

[Brady]

Well, it's a little.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, it's, it's so far gone. It's. And plus, it's not a statistical game. It really isn't. I mean, you have statistics, but you're not comping differences like that. It is, it's it's totally different. It's wins, losses, championships more than it is like individual players. Everybody knows that the touchdown record couldn't possibly have happened back in the day when they used to, you know, not even allow passing. So I mean they've changed rule after rule after rule and they're like drastically changed the game. And why? Because steroids came along and dudes were 325 pounds, can run you know, four nine forties and kill people.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

So they had to be careful because you know, then lawsuits start happening.

[Brett Vesely]

According to Google, baseball banned the use of steroids in 91, then agreed on testing in 2003 but didn't mandate mandated until 2004.

[John Holmberg]

They were sort of like, this isn't bad, it's kind of fun to watch. Yeah, it is.

[Brett Vesely]

All those years between and it's like we get to it eventually.

[John Holmberg]

Back and forth we go though on the emails Pete Rose was. And that's the. See to me that's the fun of it is baseball has those arguments of like did they, didn't they? Is this, you can't, you can't really go back in time with football and go oh those old 70s Steelers sure would beat the tar to the pitch. No they wouldn't. It's a different game. They would get. It depends on which era. Like if you took the 2002 Patriots and put them in 1976 and tried to let them play the Raiders and Steelers with those rules, that team would get killed because they don't know, you know, like the rules are so much more like pansy ass compared. I mean you get killed in the 70s. Now you take the 70s teams and put them in the modern era. You know, back in the day throwing 3,000 yards in a season was unbelievable. Now five, we don't even bat an eye when a guy throws for 5000 yards. 4000 is pretty average for every quarterback. Every decent starting quarterback's Getting at least 4. 3,000 is the bare minimum of a starting girl. Like Tyrod Taylor's a 3,000 yard quarterback with his eyes closed. So yeah, it's weird but yep, I enjoy that. So I'm glad those people get in there and start hopping in and yapping away about, you know, Pete Rose doing this, Pete Rose doing that. It's a debate. That's the fun of it. And a closed minded person will start calling you the homo F word. An open minded decent human being like me will hear you despite your slurs and say yeah, it's a good point. You can have that opinion. I see what you're saying. My personal thought is he shouldn't get into the hall of Fame, but his accomplishments should the bat, his uniform, all the stuff. And then a plaque that says disgraced former player Pete Rose, who was banned from baseball for life and will never be in the hall of Fame, also had this accomplishment of hits. And then, you know, break it down. He's just not allowed in there on the phone. The debates are fun. That's the best part of it all. But yeah, those, you know, you look at old basketball, you look at old hockey, man, when Wayne Gretzky came along, I don't know what that, what planet he's from, but you look at what he did to hockey on his own and where it it was. Steph Curry changed the game of basketball by himself and I don't think for the better, but that dude could hit shots from 26ft. And then kids in junior high and high school stopped wanting to dunk the ball and started practicing three pointers from forever away because the Splash brothers up there in San Francisco were changing the way basketball gets played up.

[Unknown]

All right, HMS Podcast time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get up north to Desert Ridge to see comedy sets from Leo Gonzalez and Tempe at the Improv. You've got Randy Feldface performing. Just Google it and you're gonna have to go see for yourself on that one. And downtown at Standup Live, the very funny Gary Owen entertains you all this week. For the complete lineups and for Tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's.

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[Brett Vesely]

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[John Holmberg]

Now seven foot dudes from Croatia are shooting 30 foot threes and running like crazy. It's not the same game. So you put the old Bulls against the modern day Golden State warriors and depending on which rule you, you use, it's two different games completely.

[Brady]

What, you know, like on the hall of fame numbers, there's 12 people that the, the board that votes on it just because he was approved saying, yeah, he can go in the hall of Fame. Now it's up to them, right?

[John Holmberg]

It's players and there's a lot of people.

[Brady]

There's a couple that is. It got. Does it have to be unanimous?

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Brady]

All 12?

[Brett Vesely]

No, I think it's 70%.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's a, it's a percentage of vote. And then, you know. Yeah. And then as you, as it's longer, you have to get more. It's. He'll get in, he'll be in. And I'm not, you know, not going to stand outside and protest like AOC or anything. If he gets in, he gets in. But I'd say probably doesn't. If you're going to have that rule, you might as well keep that rule in place where you ban a guy forever from the game for doing the cardinal sin. And again, every locker room has a sign you will be banned from baseball. If you ever bet on a game that's being played that you're in forever, you're out of the league forever. Trevor Bauer just had dirty sex and they banned him forever.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, well, officially, not unofficially.

[John Holmberg]

Unofficially he ain't going to the hall of Fame unless it's in Japan because that's where he plays now. And speaking of that. Oh, the fun of the Diddy trial continues. They got that pregnant broad up there another day to talk about freak offs. And she said, and they asked her, how many freak offs have you been in? She said, ah, hundreds. Like, oh my God, hundreds of freak offs. Yeah, a few of those are going to feel like rape. I think I'm almost positive of that. Hundreds of sex parties. You can't be 100 for 100. You just can't. A couple of those sex parties, you're gonna walk away from going, oh, boy.

[Brady]

I didn't like that.

[John Holmberg]

That one got out of hand. Yeah, of course you are. And the more sex parties you're part of, the more people are gonna go off roading on your body. You know, you're not necessarily. You're not necessarily gonna get a lovely lovemaking experience each time you go to a freak off. And now she's complaining about a few. Day three, Johnny's in the jury, and I read about some. I'm leaning towards Diddy still. Now he did some stuff where he'd kick her and he'd hit her. And then the sex workers that he hired from Craigslist would ask her when they were done, are you okay? The least favorite thing I heard was when the Craigslist sex workers would finish on Cassie, Diddy would make her go in another room and he'd rub his body all over their juice. Wow. Diddy's crazy. However, not illegal to want another man's yummy rubbed up against you off of your girlfriend. She started having prideful moments, and I know that sounds terrible, but her pride, she went. Marcellus Wallace. Her pride started with her a little. And while she's getting covered by Craigslist male prostitutes and Diddy sitting there with. Rubbing his hands together going, ah, baby oil. Screaming out instructions from the sideline like he's John Calipari. And then they'd get up and go in another room and sometimes he'd. And he, you know, he would enjoy the. Yeah, Brady, just swallow like I, Like. I handed him some sauerkraut for Biggie. Yak. Yeah, this was for Biggie. I'm thinking to you small and how about that? What if. Thank God, Biggie got shot to death? Or he'd have been at these things and people would have had.

[Brady]

Could have been down with him this much.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, he'd have been down with him, but I mean, he'd have to lay under Biggie and we'd have had to hear sex stories about that blob. Yuck. Take your panties off. Take your panties off. Oh, no. This is gonna hurt. This is gonna hurt. So through it all, Cassie's up there pregnant. They're. They're wondering how the jury's gonna respond when the. When Diddy's lawyers go up there and protect him and they're gonna have to attack a pregnant lady basically, who's sitting there talking about how Violated, she felt. Although she did release a few texts that were pretty damning about like, I don't want to do this anymore. She also released a few texts that were like, see, it's seven. Can't wait for tonight's freak off. It's like, oh, you loved some of us. Yeah, you're picking and choosing which freak offs were out of line. And basically to what I'm hearing, it was a no holds barred event and everybody knew would be like wrestlers suing Vince McMahon later for the chair matches. Like, I liked everything but that. But I did a hundred of them and two of them hurt really, really bad. So she's. It's. I'm on. I'm leaning Diddy on this. And then some other lady comes forward yesterday and says, diddy raped me. And then she starts giving details and describes his penis as a little bit of an oversized Tootsie Roll. It's not very big. She goes, and this, this is not what rape victims are supposed to say. And I'm certainly not supposed to laugh when I read it, but I did when she said, when I saw it, it looked like a Tootsie Roll, a little bit bigger than a Tootsie Roll. And she goes, oh, this isn't going to hurt. So essentially she's like, if I'm going to get raped by anything, I guess this Tootsie Roll will do.

[Brett Vesely]

Is she playing this in the background?

[John Holmberg]

She have Tootsie Roll call. Do you have that at the ready?

[Unknown]

Lay down.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no, don't read me, please. No, I'm coming at you. Nobody can hear your cries. Pants come off. Oh, all right, go ahead. We'll get this over with.

[Brady]

Walking song to the.

[John Holmberg]

How many licks did it get to the center? I laughed when I read it because it's horrible story when you think about it. But again, there goes that argument, ladies, of size doesn't matter because she made it matter in a big way. Oh, God, I'm gonna get raped. Oh, by that I'll just go to sleep for a little bit till you're done. Size does matter. In that case, size matters in a big way. If he came out with a huge hog, she'd been. She just basically said, oh, his dick isn't gonna hurt. This kind of sucks, but I'll tell on him later. But she breaks out that he's got a baby penis. Now, the fun part of that's going to be if that ever gets linked into this, which I don't think it can because these are allegations from another thing that in Order to prove the point, he has to whip it out and show that he's got a little example. A like Michael Jackson had to show his penis.

[Brett Vesely]

He kind of countersue for defamation and yeah, brings out the Tootsie Roll.

[John Holmberg]

If my client's wiener is bigger than a Tootsie Roll, she owes him $2 million. This is a Snickers box, upside down stickers, bottle veiny.

[Brady]

You'd also think you'd hear about it from all the freak off parties that people have attended.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe. I think it's classier to not talk about the size of Diddy's wiener because it also makes you seem like, oh, so it's okay. Yeah.

[Brady]

Talking about peeing.

[John Holmberg]

Well, it makes, it makes the victim sound pretty bad to go, I was raped. But I mean, it could have been worse.

[Brady]

No, but it would have been more of. In the, the environment and the culture of like.

[John Holmberg]

Sure.

[Brady]

You know, he's got.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You're basically saying black people have big penises. That's what you're saying.

[Brady]

That way, no surprise someone has a tiny unit. It gets talked about in Hollywood or someone's got a huge unit.

[John Holmberg]

Sure.

[Brady]

All these reputations that, that kind of gets out there.

[John Holmberg]

It's more big wieners that get talked about. I think Hollywood's done a nice job of keeping the tiny wiener celebrity micros out and they keep them quiet till this. But as a rape victim, you can't size shame. You know, you can't sit back and go. And her quote was, this isn't going to hurt that bad. This is a tal. Basically she's saying, I'm going to have a tolerable rape now because P. Diddy's got no size. And you know, it ain't no stickers bar, Brett. It's more of a whatchamacallit. It's not huge, but it's not. It ain't no Tootsie Roll fun size. It isn't a fun size either, Brady. It ain't no Halloween candies. I'm full size. I'm just not super sized king size. It's not like a Charleston Chew. It's not like a double up. So whatchamacallit or a symphony bar. It's dark chocolate, but yeah, you can't, you can't do that. That girl's. That girl's case automatically disappears because she, she size shamed the rapist into saying. She basically was saying it was rape, but it was like rape light or diet rape. It wasn't a. It wasn't a horrible rape because he's not well endowed. It was a. It was a tolerable rape. Although I'm still going to bring it up because, yuck, I don't like it. It's more of the act of rape than it is. But she's the one who brought up size. Rape is rape in my book. But when she said, oh, it was a small, she called it a. She called it a. An itty bitty diddy is what she said. And that's in her claim. And I'm like, all right, you're.

[Brady]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

You're just being. You're just being sort of a about it. Rape is rape. Size doesn't matter. That's the time women have to really lean into that lie that they tell all the time that size doesn't matter. They always say that size doesn't matter unless it's too big or too small. All right, Goldilocks, then size matters. You need, you need to be in your nice area there. Luckily I'm off the rack, so I don't have to worry about that. But the itty bitty Diddy thing and rape charges, you can't. Was your rapist well endowed? Unfortunately, no.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, there are different sizes of Tootsie Rolls. I mean, we do have the breakdown here.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that'll be. You should be his lawyer then.

[Brett Vesely]

She could be the snack size bars, the half inch, half ounce sizes. You got the little midgets, the. The small bite sized Tootsie Rolls.

[John Holmberg]

We're allowed to call them that anymore. I think those are little people.

[Brett Vesely]

Tootsie Rolls, classic Tootsie Rolls, giant Tootsie Roll. One of them is just jump in there and say that I'm giant 10 inches.

[John Holmberg]

You're not wrong.

[Brett Vesely]

That's what he should roll with.

[John Holmberg]

There's one that's called a midgie. Oh, yeah, that's. That shouldn't be. It's John Holberg here. Time to talk about TV's Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and Doug hopkins.com TV's Doug Hopkins. He has built and established his brand and company in a way that just has no competition. Doug's been here for a long time. He set the standard for 25 years and he just keeps getting better. And that said, if you want to sell your house for cash to Doug as is, he'll make you that offer. Start the process online. Doug hopkins.com or listen to the Doug Hopkins singers. It's John Holberg here for the amazing people at the Core Institute. Twenty years ago, the Core Institute began and it's a better way of caring for people. And there are a lot of people who are coping with pain in their bodies every day. The Core Institute specializes in helping the pain disappear. And I speak from experience. Here I am now, now living pain free and enjoying all the things I absolutely love to do. So if you're living in pain, you don't have to anymore. The Core Institute has been here for 20 years, and they're going to be here for a lot longer than that. And you can stop living with pain and start saying yes to all the things you love to do. Go to the Core Institute.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. I believe that's called a little person or a dwarf. Tootsie Roll. It depends on the DNA, I guess.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, he's got.

[Brady]

Do they still use it in the race, too? They still call them midgets, don't they?

[John Holmberg]

Huh?

[Brady]

The race cars?

[John Holmberg]

No, no. They call them dirt track cars, maybe, but no, no, the people are not called midgets anymore.

[Brett Vesely]

No candy can be called midgets.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. No, no, you can't.

[Brady]

Objects.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Really?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

What's a Bundle of Sticks called? I bet you don't say bundle of sticks. That's exactly right. You know, once the name gets kind of tainted in. You got to change the name anytime you use it, which is still why I don't understand. Spic and Span is still a thing. I don't know how that one's still on shelves.

[Brett Vesely]

But about Nips Crackers.

[John Holmberg]

Nips, Crackers. Not enough people got upset. Yeah, there are midget cars out there and stuff like that. And the reason we still say midget so cavalierly is because we're not afraid of them. That if they started marching, it would be adorable. All right, everybody step aside. Stop saying that word. You're cute. What do you want me to call you? A person? That's not possible. You're too cute to be just regular people. Who's my little midget? We're not angry at them. They shouldn't be angry at us. We don't use it. Disparage like. We're not. See, the thing is that this can't be a slur unless we're frightened of you. If we're trying to hurt your feelings, we're not trying to hurt. Nobody's trying to hurt little people's feelings ever. If we really wanted to hurt you, we'd say you were Irish. That's a slur.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. So the diddy thing's pretty funny. The Itty Bitty Diddy is that lady.

[Brett Vesely]

This, this could be another Johnny Depp.

[John Holmberg]

Amber heard it's going well. This lady's is just a brand new separate thing, which is even more fun. I'm all in on this. And there's a guy emails his anonymous name as a white guy. I love to hear that Diddy has a tiny wiener. And I think that's true too. I think all white guys are like.

[Brett Vesely]

Ah, it's not just me.

[John Holmberg]

At least I don't have to hear about his huge black hog. Because that's what as white guys, we all think we're very happy. And Brett, you can back me up on this. In a porn when there's a black guy in it and it's just average to below. Oh yeah, bigger than that guy. That's a good feeling. Because society has us trained to believe that that is a damaging piece. And black guys, you do it too. All my black friends like, yeah, well, you know, I'm like, huh. Not all of you have one. One of my black friends is lying. Joe. Joe is. Maybe it's. But he'll tell you, come on. I would live with it too, but that's a lot to live up to. Guys, a black guy, all I talk about is how small it is. And then when I'd whip it out, they'd be like, that's not small. I'm like, it is for a black eye. And then everybody be like, oh, geez, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. This nine inches, not. It's not up to snuff in my community. What are you used to. And then it would be a kind of a backhanded slap at yt. So it's, you know, there's, there's ways around it. But I can't, I can't get past the Diddy trial. It is a. It's good times, that's for sure. But you can't. If you've ever been sexually assaulted, you can't then size shame and say it wasn't so bad because he didn't have a big dick. That's just. That sounds like revenge to me over something that didn't go, you're smearing him. He had a lack of length and girth. You just say, I got raped. And he put his hand around her neck. He goes, I'm gonna suck the life out of you. And she says, then she let her neck go and unbuckled his pants and pulled out his erect bearskin penis, which appeared to be the lengthened girth of a, of a good sized tootsie. Roll. So the middle one, his.

[Brady]

His tiny hands wrapped around my neck.

[John Holmberg]

She said in her suit she was relieved by the size of his penis. It wouldn't hurt as much when he raped her due to the lack of length and girth. She thought his penis was an itty bitty ditty. That is not a rape claim. That's stand up comedy. That's a joke. You've just made jokes and you're. You can't have a laugh line in your rape claim. Sorry.

[Brett Vesely]

The laugh track at the courtrooms.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah, you can't. You can't. I was right. But it's all right, y' all, listen up, listen up. Wait, hold on. Wait till I've seen this the way. Till the last line. It's great. He's that little dick. Itty Bitty Diddy. Not guilty.

[Brady]

Could Johnny Cochran have used that back in the day?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, absolutely. The condom don't fit. You must acquit. It was baggy, like a raincoat.

[Brett Vesely]

He's right. Johnny would have used it. Itty bitty.

[John Holmberg]

Itty bitty. If it was his clothes. Itty bitty did it. Yeah. He didn't rape. Itty bitty did he? Did he? Did he what? Not guilty. He's confused.

[Brady]

You must have quitted.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's. And it, you know, it also makes you like, oh, I've seen bigger than that. Maybe. Diddy's got a regular size one and she's just used to huge ones. She's got one of those boner garages. We've always talked about ladies that brag about how they've always, you know, had a boyfriend with a huge one. All we hear is, well, that thing's wrecked.

[Brett Vesely]

She was with Lex Steele before Diddy, right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, my last boyfriend had a 10 incher. All right, well, you're off the menu because that thing's destroyed down there. I don't know why you're bragging to me about it. Before Brett, there was a girl who worked here in overnights that always talked about her boyfriend's penis. And I mean always. And she. She, like, we were supposed to be impressed. I mean, it's huge. It's about 10 inches. I can't even get my hands around it. I'm like, you know, every time you talk about this, all I picture is just this gargantuan, like, mess that you're carrying around downstairs. Well, what are you talking about? Like, you won't stop talking about how you're just. You're putting a semi in a garage. What Are you doing? It's so unattractive.

[Brett Vesely]

Everybody in this building heard about her boyfriend's crank.

[John Holmberg]

I still remember his name because she wouldn't stop. You couldn't talk to her. How was your day? It was great. Brian and I started the morning by him taking his huge hog. I'm like, oh, here we go. I mean, sometimes it rolls over on my leg and my leg goes to sleep. What? Yeah. If he's asleep at night, it's crazy. I have conversations with it. He can play the piano. All right. It's a child. It's bigger than a child. It's like more of a high school kid. Okay. And it does name for it.

[Brady]

What's that? Fungo bat.

[John Holmberg]

It's crazy. Yeah. I call it Al Qaeda because it just ruins everything. So you're rushed? Me? Yeah. So you've got terrible things happening. Down. So what does your gynecologist say after Ew. Usually? What's his first, like, hi, how you been? Let me tell you. Down, down. Here, here, here, here. Looks, looks, looks, looks. Clean, clean, clean, clean. Yeah, I can hear your echo. Because of Brian. Like, we know, like the Lou Gehrgs. I consider myself to be me luckiest gynecology in the world. I've seen live. This. This one, one, one. Yeah. Lou Gehrig. Lou Gehrig, the gynecologist. I don't. I'd like. Like. Like to meet. Meet, meet Brian. You want to meet Brian? Because he's got a big one. Yeah. Die. No, no, no. Yeah. If you've got a huge hole. Congratulations. I just said. Somebody said do an impression of the big D that girl's talking about. I don't know how to do. He was a white guy too, which was most impressive. I don't know if I can do a white guy big dick impression. It would come out black. Hey, man, I'm on the wrong body. I identify as a black dick. All right. How you doing? I'm Brian's big D. I know, I know. I sounds like I was raised in another town. You didn't expect this coming out of. I'm kind of like, you know, snow. I look white, but I sound like I'm Jamaican, if you know what I'm saying. So I've been wrecking this vagina for a long time. And a girl goes to work and tells all the co workers about me. That's cause sometimes I brain her. You've heard of brainwashing? I actually do that from the inside. I coat it like she's going through star wash. Yeah. That's exactly. That's the big D impression you asked for. Let's get ourselves away. Brady is conspicuously quiet here. We've mentioned Tootsie Rolls. Would you like us to go get you one?

[Brady]

I'm getting hung.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I thought. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? 585-9800. A good one. We'll scream it together. It's 98 KVD. Wake up. Hey, it's not weird. It's pretty cool actually.

[Brady]

No membership fees.

[John Holmberg]

I have heard enough of this.

[Larry McFeely]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from AMCO. And Wayne, if my car has an extended warranty, do I have to take it back to the dealer for service?

[Wayne]

No, Larry, if you have an extended service contract, you can use it at any amco.

[Larry McFeely]

Well, it's nice to have other options.

[Wayne]

I'll say. Amco has dealership quality rental cars, no hassles, and F master service.

[Larry McFeely]

Amco does more than just transmissions, right?

[Wayne]

Right. If you need car repairs or hear, feel, see, smell, or even think you have a car issue, call AMCO first.

[Larry McFeely]

Just Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco double A, MCO transmissions and.

[John Holmberg]

A whole lot more.

[Brett Vesely]

It's Brett Vesli from Holmberg's Morning Sickness and I want to introduce you to Patrick Riley. Now, Patrick Riley is your total home solutions provider where one call does it all look. When it comes to H vac plumbing or electrical issues, their certified professional technicians deliver quality you can trust and savings you'll appreciate. Right now, Patrick Riley is a special guys. $1,500 off a new AC system install, plus up to $1,100 in additional rebates. They offer same day emergency services with licensed professional technicians. Check them out online atPatrick Riley Services dot com.

[Mo]

Hey, what's up? It's Mo and my friends at the University of Advancing Technology has been ranked the number one best college for computer science for not one, but two years in a row. Which makes total sense because UAT are always on the lookout for those who don't just embrace technology, they live it. From advancing computer science and robotics to cybersecurity, gaming and artificial intelligence, UAT is where innovation thrives. So if you're ready to lead the next tech revolution, visit uat.edu mo and don't just study tech. Live it.