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John Holmberg
You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.
Dick Toledo
It's Dick Toledo from Holberg's Morning Sickness for Game Day Men's Health I did my free consultation with Game Day back in November because I was experiencing a lack of energy and focus. Now, nearly six months later, I'm feeling like my old old self again. Go to gameday phoenix.com today and book a free consultation in a matter of minutes at Game Day's In House lab. A licensed Game Day clinician will draw your blood, run some tests and formulate a plan to incorporate any number of these therap to help you get back in the game. You can battle the clock of aging and it starts today at one of the 11 game day men's Health locations in the valley@gameday phoenix.com Come on down.
Brady
To the Ranch House Grill. Comfort food is your next meal.
Brett
Pork Chili Verde, Chicken fried steak. Ranch House knows you'll think it's great. Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House Grill has been voted best breakfast four years in a row. We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions. Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven days a week, 6am to 2pm We're a family restaurant with a small town atmosphere serving Southwestern comfort food for 18 years. Come on down to the Ranch House Grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix at 56th street and Thomas Road.
Larry McFeely
Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from AMCO. And Wayne, if my car has an extended warranty, do I have to take it back to the dealer for service?
Wayne
No, Larry, if you have an extended service contract, you can use it at any amco.
Larry McFeely
It's nice to have other options.
Wayne
I'll say Amco has dealership quality rental cars, no hassles and faster service.
Larry McFeely
Amco does more than just transmissions, right?
Wayne
Right. If you need car repairs or hear, feel, see, smell, or even think you have a car issue, call Amco first.
Larry McFeely
Just google Amco for your nearest loc. That's Amco Double A MCO transmissions and.
Big Dick Toledo
A whole lot more.
Brady
Still streaming Homburg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Monday. It sucks right now. West Valley. We'll tell you in a second. It's 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett. There's Big Dick Toledo. This is the morning Sickness? Yeah, Just a quick start. I'm just reading the. The local stuff. There's a terrible accident on the I10, 27th Avenue heading east. So if you're coming in from the West Valley. I'm just. I don't normally do traffic unless they shut down the main vein. That's the big boy. You're not getting in for a while. They're closing it now, Buff. And evidently I just read on the. Channel 3 and channel 12, both of them said they got, like, crime tape up.
Big Dick Toledo
Oh.
Brady
So that means it was a fatality, most likely or assumed going to be a fatality. And they're investigating, so that's going to be shut down for a minute. Gotta hand it to those people, though. We do a great job getting that stuff done as fast as they can. But you got to look into those things. So if you live in the West Valley, here's your. Your. Your tip from your friendly morning earbud. Yes, we need to embrace it. We need to make it ours before they ruin it. But the earbuds tell you here, if you live in the East Valley and you got to take the i10 they normally do, you've got hours and hours to kill this morning. You don't even have to try to go to work. Call in, tell them it'll be hours. I'm stuck in this mess. I'm right behind. I can't get out. I'm in the middle lane. I'm trapped. And I was going to the gym or something. I got up really early. I'm gonna be stuck in this for hours. All right, well, understand. And then just lounge around your house, have a couple extra cups of coffee, do whatever it is you do. Just take advantage of the breakfast.
Patrick Riley
Go for breakfast.
Brady
Yeah, Go out for breakfast. Pop over. Yeah. Take yourself out. Treat yourself.
John Holmberg
Just be careful you don't hear. Sir, would you like another Moons over Miami or anything?
Brady
Get two of them.
John Holmberg
Yeah, you gotta be careful in the background.
Brady
Oh, oh. On the phone call. Yeah. Yeah. I thought you meant you were gonna be careful like you're warning. Brady. Be careful. Don't order two of them.
Patrick Riley
Don't call on when you're at the restaura.
Brady
Yeah, yeah, you call in. In the car, honk like, scream like. Son of a bitch. Yeah, exactly. Have some road rage. Yeah. Asshole. Sorry about that, boss. I'm in a disaster. All right, Johnson, you get here when you can. I know that's a tough accident and kind of follow the apps on the news. It's easier now than it's ever Been to get out of a couple hours of work and lie about it and just go home and say, you're gonna work from home. Like our sales staff does. They don't do anything. Ever try to get hold of one of them. I think I called Jen the other day and said, you working today? Oh, I work from home on whenever. It was Thursdays, I'm like, oh, like, are you there now? No, I'm at the park. She was out. She's doing something else. Just having a nice day.
Patrick Riley
Like multitasking.
Brady
Yeah. It's not working from home. That's going to the park. I don't blame him. That's what I'd be doing too. So, yeah, take advantage of this if it's not you. And don't rush around. I hate when traffic people say, try these alternate routes. Those are worse than the actual wreck because everybody's got to use them. Stay home. That's the alternate route. Don't go. How would you break your neck to try to get around somebody else's problem? Your boss is so such an asshole then. Nothing you can do about it now. I know. I'll get emails from people. I can't. I gotta get there on timer. All right, well, then you don't listen. But the people who can take advantage of this, do it.
Patrick Riley
We should do that. One morning we got caught in traffic and just do it over the phone, call in the whole show, bring it up at the board.
Brady
Yeah, better figure it out. You better have a real traffic problem because if you're caught lying about it, you're screwed. Big weekend. Biden got his diagnosis of cancer. Man, they interrupted TV shows and there was all sorts of stuff that was like an hour and a half long thing to tell us that Biden's got prostate cancer. And then I learned what a Gleason rating is. I never knew what that was. He's got a 9, which I guess is really high on a scale of one to ten. Nine is pretty good. And so he's got a nine on that. Super aggressive. And then they started to.
Patrick Riley
It's in the bones.
Brady
Well, yeah, it's metastasized into other things. And they say that's where it's aggressive and that's where it gets nasty. It's not so much the colon or the prostate cancer that gets you bad in that. It's the fact that it's left. It's left its little origin, so now they got to seek it. And I learned that yesterday, too, is that once it leaves that the medicines and the it's hard to target when it's not in one spot. So it's not good. But then they wasted 30 minutes of my life trying to tell me how he could have gotten this. 82 years old. Whatever you catch after 77 is just a product of being 77. Always got lung cancer. Should have never smoked. Like he made it like that. You did it like you got to 77. 78, smoking. Pretty good job, I think, of life expectancies. 77. And you treated yourself like garbage. And you hit it. Everything's gravy after that. You didn't catch anything because of your behavior. You made it. If you get 77, all the crap you did before, you survived it all. Good work. And then everything after that, if they try to blame. And then I watched another thing where they're trying to say that Trump's gonna get Parkinson's. You know, it was like immediately turned into this, like, oh, yeah, Biden's sick. Well, Trump's old too. And some lady said Trump runs a risk of having Parkinson's because he loves golf. And I watched 10 minutes on this. Like he's, look, he's 80. Also, the statistics of people with Parkinson's living near or being on golf courses a lot is so flawed because all old senior communities. You live on a golf course.
Patrick Riley
Yeah.
Brady
So they're all catching something. They're all more likely to get Parkinson's. Yeah. Most 18 year olds don't live on a golf course. That's what I'm saying. Because think about it, the statistics are if you live near a golf course or you're on a golf course a lot, you have a, you have a higher, the higher rate of people with Parkinson's are attached to people who live on golf course. Who lives on golf courses? 80 year olds. So of course Parkinson's rates are higher than the dorms at ASU because 55 plus communities. Yeah, they all are on golf courses. And that's when you start getting Parkinson's and nobody 20 has Parkinson's. So they're not living on golf courses. They're like, Trump's going to get it because he loves golf so much and he lives on a golf course. I'm like that, no, he's 80. He's going to get it because he's 80.
John Holmberg
You get Parkinson's from grass.
Brady
I mean, this lady was reaching. And then I saw two stories on it this morning on print, but I saw it on the yesterday and she was dead serious. And it's like an 80%, like population issue. So if you've got Parkinson's and live on a golf course, you're probably in your 60s or 70s.
Patrick Riley
Or if you like to golf, don't live on the course.
Brady
No, stop. It has nothing to do with golf courses. It's the dumbest thing. It's like saying truck drivers are more likely to be in car accidents than people without driver's licenses.
Mo
Yeah.
Brady
Most people who live on a golf course are old. Most of them. Not all of them. Most of them. Parkinson's gets most people who are elderly. It attacks the elderly more than it does the young. Yes, there are people with Parkinson's who are younger, but for the most part, you're older. So of course older people get Parkinson's. More and more older people live on golf courses. So she was like, happy to jump off the Biden's got cancer thing onto, well, Trump's gonna get Parkinson's. And like, she wanted him to have a disease too. It can't even be political or non apolitical about somebody having cancer before you start striking the other guy with all sorts of stuff. And even the host was like, well, President Trump just had a thorough health exam and said he was very healthy. Actually extremely healthy for his age. Yeah, but he lives on a golf course, so he's. He's gonna get Parkinson's. I'm like, this lady's nuts. Like, get back to the murder show I was watching. I get it. Biden's not gonna make it. Guess what? I'm not a doctor. I could have fandueled this one. Something was gonna grab him in the next little bit. He wasn't doing so great the last few years he was due. Now, I wouldn't have guessed this, but something was gonna get him and people acted shocked. I'm like, an 82 year old man's got some sort of disease. Wait, people are. You're taken aback by this. Yeah, he was gonna get something.
John Holmberg
And I'm trying to play conspiracy here, but. Oh, doesn't he get. Doesn't he get regular physicals and everything else? This is the first time they've ever found it.
Brady
Yeah. Second, it also happens to be two days after the big release of the right audio tapes that now you can't make fun of them and stuff. So it took it. It's a thing. I definitely think the timing was on the heels of these. I don't know if you've heard those audio tapes of him. Oh, man.
John Holmberg
No, I haven't heard.
Brady
Oh, my God. He's. There's audio tapes of his investigation from 2023 when they were talking about the, the documents and top secret files that were at his house and they did that big investigation, heard those tapes. Give yourself, give yourself a few minutes to just cringe because it is tough. It is an old man trying to remember stuff. And I mean, you start feeling sorry for him until you realize this dude's president and wanted to keep being president like it was. It's scary bad how just completely gone he is. And so that happened on Thursday and Friday and they were Axios released all those tapes on Friday and gave the news and they did it on Friday and hopes that it would kind of, I think, go away. It's bad. And so then Sunday he gets diagnosed with, or at least announced that he's not in great shape.
Patrick Riley
I heard that, you know, they can treat it with testosterone.
Brady
What? Hormone therapy. That's how they. But if it's isolated, if it's in your bones, it gets tougher. Holberg's Morning Sickness Holberg's Morning Sickness 88.
Big Dick Toledo
K U P D All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the valley this week. Get up north to Desert Ridge to see comedy sets from Leo Gonzalez and Tempe at the Improv. You've got Randy felt face performing. Just Google it. And you're gonna have to go see for yourself on that one. And downtown at stand Up Live, the very funny Gary ow entertains you all this week. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it.
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John Holmberg
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Brady
Prostate cancer's got several treatments they know work so long as it stays there, but anything when it starts drifting out. And evidently nine on a Gleason scale basically means it's super aggressive. So the chances of it running other places are pretty high. Also, he's 82 and he wasn't in great shape to begin with. But you're right, they weren't fingering him like pretty regularly and finding out about the prostate like they announced that they did. Yeah. They said that they just missed the.
Patrick Riley
Report throughout his tenure that it was. He was healthy and yeah, it was good.
Brady
They kept saying it.
Patrick Riley
Yeah.
Brady
And then you wonder like, yeah, but prostate cancer, I just, I know it can pop up, but does it pop up like super aggressive and it's in the bones and it's like, all right. And Brett's right. He gets like a little bit better medical treatment than most of us. Yeah. Are more consistent.
John Holmberg
He's not going to urgent care.
Brady
No. He doesn't have to do the five year. Five year weights for fingerings. Which by the way, I am in singular, singular protest of. Yes, I know it's bad for me, but I am the Don Quixote of prostate exams. I believe that an all of that. I've said this for years. Medical technology has advanced to places that I can go online and get a pretty accurate diagnosis. They can blood test and find just about anything. You still have to finger me to find that there isn't a test. Ultrasound of some sort that can. That's a Dr. Power move. They still want to finger us just to let us know we got you by the balls here and we're going to stuff. We're going to bang you in the ass here in a little bit. Just to let you know there's got to be a better way than that intrusive nightmare. You can find out all sorts of stuff through technology nowadays with just a little pin prick of something. You don't have to have some dude fingering me when he puts the glove on. That's pretty 1800s if you ask me. Besides that I'm anti finding it. I know people are like, if you find it earlier, that's fine. I don't mind dying. I don't want to get fingered a lot. And once they find something wrong in there, they got to go back in over and over and over again. And that's just not how I want to spend my weekends.
Patrick Riley
You're going for a Gleason 10?
Brady
I'm not going for any of it. If I have it right now. I'm dumb and I'm happy and I'm good and I'm moving right along. And again, I've lived a nice run here. I got no. I've seen what age does to people. It ain't pretty. You think this face is going to get better with time? Nah, I'm not. I'm just going to keep looking in the mirror and be disappointed. It's a blessing if my butt falls out. So many people out there would be like, finally, homework's dying. It would thrill 80% of the city. Look, it's a win win for everybody. And that's why I'm not checking it out. And I'll get emails where you get checked. You get caught early. I'm like, that's fine. Then you gotta go to the doctor and get butt fingered like six times a week. And then people digging around in there with forks and knives and I'm not interested in that. I got no kids. That's fine. Part of that is like, what do I have? You know, we're. People are taken care of with insurance and the life insurance and policies and all sorts of things. Everybody will be. The world will be better off, Brady. If my butt falls out. But in the meantime, I'm fine as far as I know. And by the way, it's not from a lack of looking. I do my own checking. Feels the same as it always has. I've been in there washing. I'm like, there you are, you little bastard. You feel the same. No puffs, no nothing. If some stranger can go in there and feel it for the first time and know what he's looking for, a guy like me, who's been hands on with that guy for a long time, knows where exactly that little almond lives. You're good. We're all good here.
Patrick Riley
The stream is the most important thing. You're streaming fine.
Brady
I think so. Yeah. I pee hard enough to bounce off of the urinal back onto my knees when I wear shorts at a that a sons came so pretty sure I'm powerfully strong on that. I just Got no interest in doctor's visits taking up my life. I know two or three people that had something on their colon or whatever. They were going in there for polyps or something. Yeah, they're in there four or five times. Dudes digging around in their ass. And I had to pick them up twice. Is this worth it? I'm not even worried about the gay thing. I do gayer stuff than the doctor's gonna do with my fingers. Just in the shower, washing myself. Yeah, I don't like. I don't like doctors that much, and I feel like I've done plenty. I really don't look forward to staying here for 90 years like most people. Like, I don't know. I don't get that. My brain doesn't operate that way. What does that say? It's better to flame out than. I don't forget what it is. It's a lyric from a song. Better than. I don't remember this. To die fast than it is to, like, live forever and do nothing.
John Holmberg
I don't remember that one.
Brady
I like the idea. Like, Gary Shandling said it, the last time anybody says you're young is when you die young. Like if you're 60. Because he died. He said 66. He was talking about Robin Williams. He goes, nobody is. The last time you can be called young is when you die when you're 66. Because they said Robin Williams died when he said so young. So young. Nobody said young about him at all. But that's the only time you can get called young. Still leave him wanting more. I say, better to burn out than fade. There it is. Better to burn out than fade away. Amen to that. Especially if your ass is falling out of you and you got some guy digging around in there every couple weeks. I'm not like my neighbors. I'm not interested in that. If I was them, I'd be getting treatments every week. And plus, wouldn't. Wouldn't you feel that? I'm super familiar with the area. I don't think Biden's of the generation that washed his ass properly, so he probably. Yeah, he had. Oh, did Biden ever have a rust butt? Same generation that likes walking around gyms naked and showing each other their junk is the one that never washed their ass. Ironically. And yeah, he never got in there, so he never felt his own prostate. There's got to be a better way. Until they come up with it. This one says, I find it hilarious how your rants are about not getting a prostate exam. Coming from man keeps his ass so clean. Okay. Somebody's gonna toss his salad. Or a man who is stuck vibrating a butt plug in there cause he lost the bet. You're the best. It's true. I'll use it for pleasure. I don't want it to get sick and find out about it. It's not like dental stuff. Nobody sees it unless I want them to. And I keep it clean like I do my teeth. But I don't know what's going on in there. That could be a nightmare too. Long as it doesn't hurt, I don't go. And that is my sound medical advice to all of you.
John Holmberg
Dr. Holmberg has spoken.
Brady
Checkups are a waste of time. Wellness checks, that's a money grab. I feel fine. I should go to the doctor. That's women. Women started that and then they talked us into it. And you'll hear people email. I got. Luckily I went to the doctor. I caught mine early. Good for you. Did it hurt? No. Were you happy? Yeah. How many times you've been to the doctor with a finger in your ass lately? Quite a lot. Well, that's not. Not for pleasure. To each their own.
Patrick Riley
I say welcome to test city.
Brady
Oh, yeah. Oh. The second they find a bubble on there, it's over. Oh, Megan. For years tried to get me, you gotta go get your moles checked. You gotta get. Because she had a skin cancer thing. Scared the hell out of her and should have. She's very fair skinned. But she likes going to the doctor like most women. Like that's a treat. She wants to go to the dentist like five times a year. She loved it. It's weird. Weird like I got another dentist appointment. I wish I could do four cleanings. You can. I guess the dentist is even like, what the you want to do that for? So she tells me to go to the doctor. I go to my doctor and I'm like, I don't. I don't care about any of this. Because I agreed to just. I said, look, if I do this, will you get off my back? All right. So I run over this, like five years ago. I run over the doctor. I'm like, I'm supposed. I feel great, by the way. And he goes, okay. And he didn't want to be there either. And he's like, what do you want to check for? I'm like, I don't know. That's your job. So sat there and we talked for a little bit. He stuck a popsicle stick in my mouth and started to feel me and touch my veins. Can you take your Shirt off. I'm like, yeah. And he goes, okay. You seem all right. I'm like, I'm supposed to get these moles looked at. And he goes, I'm looking at him. All right. He goes, you're fine. I'm like, really? I was like, all of them? Even this one. He goes, that might be a nipple. And he pointed to this. I have this weird mole under my left breast because that actually might be a nipple. I'm like, no kidding. I got a third nipple. And he goes, maybe the way it protrudes, it doesn't look like a mole. Is. Is sensitive. And I'm like, it hurts sometimes when I hit it wrong. And he goes, it might be a nipple. Like, I did learn something. And he goes, do you. Do you feel, like, any sort of pain when you do this, this, this and this? Like, no. He's looking at my back. And he goes, you're good. I left. I go home. And he goes, I said, cleanest bill of health you'd have. I pulled to trump. Healthiest guy he's ever seen. Never seen anyone healthier in his life. That doctor's not good. I'm like, you want something wrong with me? Like, what do you mean? That doctor's not. What kind of exam says, I'm looking at it? He did. Isn't that all he's supposed to do? He didn't take it. A culture. I wouldn't have let him. He shouldn't have taken one of those moles off to see if it was bad. If it's good, I want my money back. What if he. What if he's like. He calls me? Back goes, that mole I ripped off. It's fine.
Patrick Riley
I got four scooped off my back.
Brady
Yeah. And they were all fine. Yeah. Waste of time.
Patrick Riley
And then they want you to come back.
Brady
Yeah. Scoop more.
Patrick Riley
Well, not only that is. They'll just keep coming back. Let's observe to look. That's exactly what they're doing. Looking.
Brady
See, that's what the dude did last. They just. He kind of. He did give him credit. He kind of got Johnny Bench on me. He went down into the crouch staring at my stomach. And my thing is, none of these are bad. My back. It's John Holmberg here. Time to talk about TV's Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and Doug hopkins.com, tV's Doug Hopkins. He has built and established his brand and company in a way that just has no competition. Doug's been here for a long time. He set the Standard for over 25 years. And he just keeps getting better. And that said, if you want to sell your house for cash to Doug as is, he'll make you that offer. Start the process online. Doughotkins.com or listen to the Doug Hopkins singers. It's John Holberg here for the amazing people at the Core Institute. Twenty years ago, the Core Institute began, and it's a better way of caring for people. And there are a lot of people who are coping with pain in their bodies every day. The Core Institute specializes in helping the pain disappear. And I speak from experience. Here I am now living pain free and enjoying doing all the things I absolutely love to do. So if you're living in pain, you don't have to anymore. The Core Institute has been here for 20 years and they're going to be here for a lot longer than that. And you can stop living with pain and start saying yes to all the things you love to do. Go to the Core Institute. Dot Comberg's morning sickness. And then my friend Mark, he's got the same disease as a woman would have, which is I love. He loves going to the doctor. He loves my friend Mark. Stabbing. I don't use names. He's CEO of that bank, Mark Stebbings. He was probably every Tuesday for about three years, did anal stress tests. He'd tell me about him all the time. He was getting his ass checked constantly because he was worried about his pee. I'm like, how many times have you had. Oh, you got to get checked. You got to get checked. I'm like, all right, all right, calm down. We're in the pool about three years ago. He looks and he goes, you got to get your back checked. I'm like, why? There's a couple moles on there. I'm concerned about. I'm like, how much training do you have kids? How much training do you have, banker boy? None. But, you know, you should get checked. I'm like, yeah, all right, maybe I get it, maybe I don't. Doctor was like. And then the doctor said that one thing. He said, your prostate is. He said all the ultrasound and all your. Your blood work came back aces. You look great. And he goes, prostate exam. I guess we can. And I'm like, I don't really. He goes, I don't want to do it if you don't. And I'm like, yeah, we're good here. And then I left. He was the best doctor I've ever had in my life. He didn't want. It was five o' clock in the afternoon. He wanted to go home. What kind of doctor says, if you don't want this, why is he. You need to go to another exam? Like, nope. I said you'd get off my back if I went to this one. Came back 10 out of 10. You're gonna die from something. We all are, honey. That's the way it works. So when they started to break down Biden's disease and start to blame stuff for it, I'm pretty sure I know the answer to it. I don't have any medical training either, but 82 is the reason he's got it.
Patrick Riley
Stuff starts to break at zoos. That's the number one. Cancer is the number one thing that animals. Because they get so old eventually.
Brady
Prostate cancer does. No, just cancer cancer. Yeah. Yeah. Eventually your body starts shutting down.
Patrick Riley
I mean, they're living two times longer than they would out in the wild.
Brady
Yeah. They were designed to be eaten by something else or just drop dead from the elements. So were we, by the way. Now some of it's. Some of it's real. This guy says, you are right. I had no intention of going to a doctor for a stomach issue. That was nothing. My wife freaked out, forced me to go fast forward 500 bucks later, and the doc says, you're perfectly healthy. It's diagnosis was that wings and pizza and beer is bad for me. When football's on, I'm gonna feel it for a few days. His stomach started hurt because he was overdoing pizza and wings. Oh, that is something that a good dad will tell you. My dad failed in that. And I don't know that I'd have listened, but when I was pounding wings as a, you know, younger, and. And now it's like I have to be. My dad and I used to order six dozen wings from Long Long down the street at the dirty1 on 8th Avenue and Extension. Dirty ass. Long Long. So you lived over there. But six dozen was like 12.95. I still don't know how they were doing. They were running coke out of that place. There's no way. That was like 13 bucks. So we were getting six dozen wings for 13 out of a semi back there was insane. My dad would look at me and he goes, wings. I'm like, goddamn right, wings. And I'd go grab them and come back and we would. He and I, on a Saturday would kill all six dozen. All of them, all of them. And look at each other like nothing. My dad's like, oh. He never once said, you can't do this at my age or enjoy this, while it lasts, this goes away. And you know, then you start thinking there's something wrong with you when you just realize, I know why I did this. Salt is another one nobody tells you about later in life. Salt. Eat salt. Your ears swell up like, what the hell is going on? I used to be able to crush salt, no problem. Now if I have a little bit, my stomach blows up and my ears hurt. It's not a medical condition. It's called I'm 52. Salt's a mother effort. There's truth to the way Brady's doing it. Just go. Just go, baby, go. And salt doesn't bother you? Go. Tyler, I guarantee you that you might get a little heartburn. You know what you do? You eat through it. You power through, put more in. Yeah.
Patrick Riley
Into some roadblocks every now and again.
Brady
The cure for heartburn is more of that red salt. Plus, I think it's power. Power. Yeah. So doctors will just. They wipe you out. I had my doctor buddy tell me that. Oh, half of our exams are just for money, you son of a bitch. He goes. Yeah, he goes. Everybody's so worried about stuff. They come in when they're healthy, which is good. He was happy because we don't need to. I look at people immediately and go, this guy's just fine. Wife made him come in. And what does it. What does Jill Biden do? I thought she was a doctor. You know what she's not doing? Little backdoor play on her husband because she'd have noticed. But, yeah, he did that. If you listen to those Axios tapes, this announcement, I'm thinking he was trying to skirt through this whole deal without anybody knowing he had it, because the last thing he wanted was people to think he was sick before. But now with these tapes coming out, this is a nice distraction. Even made Trump put out a thing that said, ah, I hope the Bidens are all okay. That's terrible news. And everything else, Trump was even nice to him, so this worked out in a good way.
Patrick Riley
I was talking with a friend over the weekend, and they were talking about presidents where they make all their money is these million dollar speeches over them. Like, I don't think every one of them, you know, Obama, you know, it's the prime example of it. Yes, he was very good. Certain did it. I go, you're not going to see million dollar speeches from Biden.
Brady
No. Or Bush. Or Bush. Although he did do some stuff. If he showed up, I suppose you'd give him some money. I don't know where they make do that.
Patrick Riley
Appearances.
Brady
But, you know, maybe other countries. Pam, I don't see a lot of, like, Obama giving a speech at things or anybody really. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know where they make their money. They make money on knowing the stock market before us. Here's something spe of money. And again, I'm not a doctor or a politician, but let me save Mexico a ton of money. Evidently you. If you. If your navy ships still have sails. Not much of a navy ship.
Patrick Riley
I think it was a head scratcher.
Brady
Yeah. When they kept saying Mexico, don't call it that. Mexican navy vessel hits Brooklyn Bridge and looked at it and I go, this will be bad. And I expected like a modern day Navy vessel, maybe with curb feelers or something like just to make it known that it's Mexican or. Or it's pink and yellow or. I don't know.
Patrick Riley
That wasn't even. It sounds like it wasn't even war ready.
Brady
It had sail. I know.
John Holmberg
Looked like it was out of Pirates of the Caribbean for Christ's sake.
Patrick Riley
I called it a training ship.
Brady
There's John Candy at the helm. This is summer rental. Why in the world do they keep calling it. And if it's for training, who are they training? They're gonna fight the Spanish in 1700. Again, not a navy boat. And by the way, if it's a training vessel, first thing, it doesn't fit under bridges. How about that? Start there. They kept saying, mexico's terror and it's tragic. It killed people. Was trying to. It hit the Brooklyn Bridge, which is like 180 years old. Worried more about the bridge, but the neck, Mexico. First off, if you.
Patrick Riley
I watch different angles. It's amazing. I mean, the bridge just didn't even.
Brady
The bridge is fine.
Patrick Riley
It's like breaking sticks.
Brady
First, let me ask this. A, why does Mexico have a Navy. B, what's its ship doing in New York?
Patrick Riley
Training.
Brady
And C, they're invading us. Who's gonna attack Mexico anytime soon? Like, dude, save your money on military. And let's not get so egomaniacal to think that if trouble was brewing down on the. In Acapulco in the Pacific front there, that we wouldn't be down there from San Diego in a heartbeat helping you out. Who's attacking Mexico? And I know Central America runs through it all the time. They're not. They don't want to stay in Mexico. Nobody in their right mind right now. Maybe Doug Hopkins is looking for deals in Mexico. Nobody's trying to take that land over the poorest country in the world is looking at Mexico like, right, let's get them. Like, nobody's trying to take over Mexico. Cancel your navy. In fact, cancel your entire military and just give uniforms to the cartel. They're the ones protecting you anyway. But when I saw that Mexican navy ship and it had sail, it took me a second. I'm like, are those sails? They sail to their wars. And in a way it's going to.
Patrick Riley
Take a while to get here for backup.
Brady
Think about it.
Patrick Riley
If we align with them in a.
Brady
Think how clever it is. That's like, hey, North America's under attack. You guys ready? Metro's like, we're ready. What do you need us to do? I need your navy to get up to. All right, we'll get the sales set. Like, what? What did you say? We'll set sail for morning. Set sail. You have sails on your. Never mind. We'll do it. And like, got us out of that war. We can sleep in. Canada's navy probably has a boat or two that I bet you we gave them. Who's trying to attack Canada? Nobody's attacking over here. Cancel your military. Mexico. That's silly.
Big Dick Toledo
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Brady
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Patrick Riley
That ship is already repaired.
Brady
Yeah, just put a couple more sticks. Yeah, they put it. They went to Home Depot and got some more masts. All right, J. Paul, we need to go left. We need to get the big sheet. Yeah, their sheets are on it. Like, I saw that one sale go up, up, and there's a picture of piolin on there. I'm like, oh, it's just a bed sheet.
Patrick Riley
Like, is it there for, like, tours or something?
Brady
I don't know.
John Holmberg
It's gotta be, you know, I don't.
Brady
Think they were too familiar with the area. I'm pretty sure they were unfamiliar with the. With the passageways because they smashed into the most well known bridge in New.
Patrick Riley
York, and there's a tug next to.
Brady
It, probably honking like, hey, slow down. Palace down. We're good. I haven't even got the sails up. I don't even know how this thing's moving.
John Holmberg
It's like plane strain zombas. You're going the wrong way.
Brady
Turn around. Hey, you, man. You don't know where I'm going. You're gonna hit the bridge. Shut up, twerp. Look at Braden down there yelling at me from his little baby boat.
Patrick Riley
You did you measure? I measured.
Brady
So now they're gonna rebuild it, and they're gonna have to bridge feelers on the top to scrape. I think we're gonna hit that bridge, player. No, we're good. And by the way, we're the Mexican Navy. Training. What? Training? Yeah, I don't think that's a thing. I really don't know that the Mexican Navy is a necessity in any way, shape, or form. We got you, Mexico. We gotcha. This was the last sound the cars on the Brooklyn Bridge heard. Oh, no. Hey, look out, bridge, here we come. We're going to hit it.
Patrick Riley
I mean, the traffic was kind of standing still, was moving a little bit. It's pretty close. That m when it goes over to the side of the road there, you can see that just mass coming from the side.
Brady
You're going to be sitting there like, that's not going to make it. You're on the Brooklyn Bridge. There's a lot of walking traffic on that Brooklyn. You'll be looking like that. That's not good. Hey, who did the horn. I'm the commodore. You're not allowed to touch that. I'm like Lionel Richie around here. That's my. Easy like a Sunday morning on my horn, man. I'm commodore in the Mexican Navy. Did you see the bridge? Yup. And you hit it? Yup. Why? Because we got sails, player. Why? I don't understand our Navy. I don't even know why we have jobs. Like, what are we gonna do about it? Nobody's ever, you know, what, call Mexico. We're in deep trouble. Let's get the Navy involved. Never. You guys don't need a navy. P.J.
John Holmberg
Trump, we're busy.
Brady
Yeah, P.J. trump. We're driving around New York. Go to Washington Heights. I just got done watching Washington Night. US Navis girl is hot, man. We're gonna go up there.
Patrick Riley
They're heading back, and they didn't want to go back.
Brady
If we don't get this boat out of here, it's going to get deported. We're not gonna make it. Another bridge. Who are you? Get off my boat. Mexican Navy. No offense, Mexico, but come on. Says you're right, John. Mexico went to Home Depot to build the Navy warship. They also picked up a few sailors in the parking lot. I don't know what the hell they were thinking. Says it makes everybody in the Rio Grand Mexican Navy SEALs. Now, that's just rude, but hilarious, Daniel. SEAL training. We get to Texas, we're SEALs. Anyway, I just giggled at that. I know it's a tragedy and stuff, but again, I'm not the brightest guy in the world, and I'm pretty bad. They lost control of it, too. That was a thing that they said. They lost power. Power. It's a sailboat.
Patrick Riley
Like the ship that was in Maryland.
Brady
Yeah, the one that bashed into that bridge. I mean, I think people were nervous that if you took down the. Can you imagine the Brooklyn Bridge going out and the Mexican Navy's to blame. Oh, Trump would have nuked them. I can't even believe that. What in the. What in the. Were you guys doing? We're gonna go ahead and get rid of Mexico completely. Yeah, they lost power. And when they kept saying, we lost power.
Patrick Riley
It's a sailboat kind of drifting into the side of the main.
Brady
Well, the tugboats were evidently. And I don't know this for sure. Evidently the tugboats were trying to grab. We'll get it. They were trying to grapple on there because the Mexican Navy had lost control of their boat, and. And so they tried to hook on, but they couldn't Catch it. It was cruising along pretty quick. Don't scratch the paint, player. What are you doing with that hook? You know what? Hit the gas, I say. These guys are trying to hook us.
Patrick Riley
It's powered by three Nova engines.
Brady
Back. It's just the Nova with sales. You named the car the no Go. This thing won't slow down. I don't even have any of the sheets up. This is bad, man. What did they rent that thing for, quinceaneras or something? I know it's. But I mean, why in the world was it in New York? When in the world did we ever say, get me a Navy ship to New York City and make it Mexican? Never. I didn't even know they had boats. Only boats I know they've got are for marlin fishing for tourists. Where's the big Mexican Navy port? As an American, I've been to all their cool cities on the coast. I was 18 last time I went. I'm never going back. Never once do I remember a big, like, Mexican aircraft carrier rolling through.
Patrick Riley
Is it Mexico City?
Brady
That's inland a little. Little. I don't know where their navy boats are. Where's their big Navy ports?
Patrick Riley
Acapulco.
Brady
Yeah, We've all been there. We didn't see the naval yard of sailboats. Evidently every boat, they've got part of the Navy now. One of them drifted over to New York. Think of that. Made it all the way to New York. That's a long haul. And then hit the Brooklyn Bridge. There aren't any bridges out in the ocean. This is dumb. Your fault. Players should have put a bridge there. Okay, it's a shortcut.
Patrick Riley
If we go under the bridge, I.
Brady
Think we can do it. I don't know. They're on some side. I think we can get under it if we just kind of hit the hydraulics and we'll drop down. Bill, boy, we're gonna hit the bridge. This American guy's a pain in the ass. Man. You're no fun. You see the cops and the little tugboats coming up next to him? You guys see he's just smashing that bridge back there? Yeah, we did. But is it cool if I say he was driving? Because I don't have insurance. There's a boat insured at all. Let me dig around in the glove compartment. Hit it. Run, player. Are you putting your sales up? They're not going to go up anymore. You know what? I'm just going to keep it here. Yeah, I don't have insurance, so I don't know. You're Going to have to pay for this.
Patrick Riley
Maybe it was just a little kind of joy riding. They wanted to get close to the bridge, and then the power went out.
Brady
Yeah, the tags do a little loop.
John Holmberg
Around like Armin says too. Those. Those sales were completely lit up. Where'd you lose power from?
Brady
Exactly. They were lit up like. Like they were gonna have a. A quesanera.
Patrick Riley
Yeah, I don't think the. But the sales weren't out.
Brady
No, but they were lit.
John Holmberg
The master was all lit up.
Patrick Riley
Party going on.
Brady
Oh, there's something. Because it was Christmas lights.
Patrick Riley
Yeah. As training.
Brady
Your tags expired in 78. Oh, my wife was supposed to do that. I'll get mad at her when I get home. 47 years ago. I don't think you're gonna do the tags for real. Anyway, I don't know what was going on in that Mexican navy boat. I laughed hysterically when they said, don't just say a Mexican boat or a boat from Mexico. You put navy on there and I immediately lose the gravity of the situation that people were injured or killed. And I'm just glad the Brooklyn Bridge is okay. That thing's sturdy, man. Oh. Just didn't. Nothing happened at all.
Patrick Riley
Any impact whatsoever.
Brady
Dudes back in the early 1900s, late 1800s, put that thing together and said, not even the Mexican navy can take this down. That's probably what their claim was. Hey, check it out. Watch this, man. These bridges, you can bash into them all day long. They don't budge. Ingenuity. I love it. I think it's great. This one says John. This is from Ramon Lopez Raylo. Believe it or not, Mexico has an air force. It's compromised of old World War I biplanes. Airships. Kitty Hawk is. But yeah, I think they're there. We just keep them over at Kitty Hawk. That's where our planes are. You know, in case somebody gets a wild hair like France and tries to dig Mexico again. A lot of threats coming your way. Mexico, people trying to. The only country that would be interested in you is us, and we're not. I think we'd be the only ones who are like, I think we're gonna annex. We're just gonna take Mexico. I dare you. Look, we've seen your navy ships in action. This is gonna be a fast fight.
John Holmberg
Maybe Greenland's gonna bring out their navy next. Oh, Greenland probably start bashing into our. Bashing into our bridges too.
Brady
Greenland's boat, which is just rowed over by Vikings. Yeah, I don't understand any of that, but I laughed for about 30 minutes. It made me. Made me go. Anyway, congratulations, Mexico. I can make fun of you because your navy is worse than like Afghanistan. And they didn't need a Navy at all.
Patrick Riley
That was their only destroyer.
Brady
We used a destroyer. We wrecked it. I bet you they don't rebuild it. They just lost a boat. A Mexican Navy looked like one of.
John Holmberg
Those bottles or those ships in a bottle and stuff.
Brady
It did. I want to see the Mexican Navy uniform. It's gotta be epic. I've never once seen a Navy. A Mexican Navy officer walking around. Ever.
John Holmberg
White socks to your knees and only.
Brady
The top button is buttoned on their white shirt. Says it absolutely wasn't the mast of the sale that hit that bridge. It was 300 foot high. Stack of furniture and mattresses it had in tow in the back of it. Pretty impressive. Anyway, we can make fun of the Mexican Navy because I think all of us agree that's the first time we've ever heard of LA Navy. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? 589,800. That's the number and we'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. 98 kupt.
Larry McFeely
Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from Amco. And Wayne, if my car has an extended warranty, do I have to take it back to the dealer for service?
Wayne
No, Larry, if you have an extended service contract, you can use it at any amco.
Larry McFeely
It's nice to have other options.
Wayne
I'll say. Amco has dealership quality rental cars, no hassles and faster service.
Larry McFeely
Amco does more than just transmissions, right?
Wayne
Right. If you need car repairs or hear, feel, see, smell, or even think you have a car issue, call Amco first.
Larry McFeely
Just Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco double A MCO transmissions and.
Big Dick Toledo
A whole lot more.
John Holmberg
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Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Detailed Summary of Episode 05-19-25
Podcast Information:
The episode begins with a traditional introduction of Holmberg's Morning Sickness (HMS) podcast, featuring advertisements from sponsors such as MMP Guns.com, Game Day Men's Health, and Ranch House Grill. Dick Toledo and Larry McFeely promote services related to men's health and automotive repairs, respectively.
John Holmberg kicks off the main content by addressing a significant traffic accident:
Accident Report: A severe accident occurred on the I-10 at 27th Avenue heading east, likely resulting in fatalities. Both Channel 3 and Channel 12 reported "crime tape," indicating a serious incident requiring police investigation.
Traffic Impact: The main lane (referred to as the "big boy") is closed, causing substantial delays for commuters, especially those coming from the West Valley. Brady Bogen suggests that those affected should consider calling work to explain their delays, humorously referencing the leniency of sales staff who allegedly "don't do anything."
Notable Quote:
The host and co-hosts delve into the breaking news of President Biden being diagnosed with aggressive prostate cancer:
Diagnosis Details: President Biden has been diagnosed with a Gleason score of 9, signifying a highly aggressive form of prostate cancer that has metastasized to his bones, making it difficult to treat effectively.
Media Coverage Critique: Brady criticizes the media for focusing on Biden's diagnosis without sufficient medical expertise, leading to misinformation and sensationalism. He expresses skepticism about the timing of the announcement, linking it to the release of contentious audio tapes involving Biden.
Comparison with Trump: The discussion shifts to speculations about former President Trump potentially developing Parkinson's disease due to his love for golf, which Brady debunks by highlighting the flawed logic behind such claims, emphasizing that Parkinson's is more prevalent in the elderly regardless of their activities.
Medical Examinations Satire: Brady uses humor to vent his disdain for intrusive medical procedures, specifically prostate exams, advocating for less invasive diagnostic methods.
Notable Quotes:
Continuing from the discussion on medical examinations, Brady and Patrick Riley engage in a humorous yet critical dialogue about the necessity and intrusiveness of routine medical checkups:
Prostate Exams: Brady mocks the traditional prostate exam, referring to it as an "intrusive nightmare" and expresses a personal stance against regular checkups, despite acknowledging their potential benefits for early detection.
Personal Anecdotes: Brady shares exaggerated personal experiences of uncomfortable doctor visits, emphasizing his preference for avoiding unnecessary medical interventions. This segment serves as a comedic critique of the healthcare system's approach to men's health.
Notable Quotes:
The conversation shifts to an unusual incident involving the Mexican Navy:
Accident Overview: A Mexican Navy sailing ship collided with the Brooklyn Bridge, leading to traffic disruptions and public concern. Brady and Patrick Riley humorously question the efficacy and functionality of the Mexican Navy, highlighting the incongruity of a sailing ship being part of a modern naval force.
Skepticism on Navy's Capability: The hosts mock the notion that Mexico maintains a capable naval force capable of such operations, suggesting that the incident underscores the perceived incompetence of Mexico's maritime defenses.
Imaginary Scenarios: Brady entertains absurd scenarios, such as hypothetical invasions and the redundancy of Mexico's naval presence, further amplifying the comedic critique.
Notable Quotes:
In this segment, the hosts intersperse the main topics with various humorous anecdotes and tangential discussions:
Doctor Visits: Brady recounts a friend’s experience with excessive medical testing, juxtaposing it with his own reluctance to undergo similar procedures.
Historical References: References to "Robin Williams' death" and "Gary Shandling" add a cultural layer to the humor, highlighting the fleeting nature of life and fame.
Humorous Imagery: Descriptions of naval mishaps and imaginary dialogues with Mexican Navy sailors add to the comedic portrayal of the incidents.
Notable Quotes:
The episode concludes with a mix of advertisements and light-hearted banter:
Advertising Promotions: Sponsors such as Fisher Tools, CMC Steel Arizona, and Turf Monsters AZ are promoted with special offers and services.
Final Thoughts: Brady wraps up the discussion on the Mexican Navy incident with a humorous tone, expressing relief that the Brooklyn Bridge remains unscathed despite the collision.
Notable Quote:
The show ends with additional sponsor mentions, including University of Advancing Technology, emphasizing their ranking in computer science and promoting their programs.
Summary Insights:
Health and Media: The episode underscores skepticism towards mainstream media's handling of serious health news, particularly regarding high-profile figures like President Biden.
Critical Humor: The hosts employ humor and satire to critique various societal norms, including medical practices and international naval capabilities.
Engagement with Current Events: By addressing contemporary incidents such as the Mexican Navy ship accident and presidential health issues, HMS maintains relevance and engages listeners with topical discussions.
Listener Relatability: Through personal anecdotes and comedic takes on everyday frustrations (e.g., traffic jams, medical exams), the show fosters a connection with its audience, balancing humor with informative content.
Conclusion:
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness blends humor with critical commentary on pressing issues like presidential health and international incidents. Through engaging dialogues and satirical insights, the hosts offer listeners both entertainment and a platform to reflect on societal practices and media narratives.