06-13-25 - ManCave Upgrade Finals - Part Three - Two Remaining Contestants Do Marv Albert Style Play By Play To Bret's Videos

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode: 06-13-25 - ManCave Upgrade Finals - Part Three - Two Remaining Contestants Do Marv Albert Style Play By Play To Bret's Videos
Release Date: June 13, 2025
Host/Authors: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Platform: 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio

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Introduction

In the June 13, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness on Arizona's #1 morning radio show, host John Holmberg along with his co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo delve into the highly anticipated finals of the "ManCave Upgrade" contest. The episode is vibrant with humor, irreverent discussions, and a unique twist on traditional sportscasting.

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ManCave Upgrade Finals: Contest Overview

The episode centers around the finals of the "ManCave Upgrade" contest, where the last two contestants, Russ Brody and Joshua, compete by providing Marv Albert-style play-by-play commentary to some of Bret's unconventional and often explicit videos. The premise combines classic sports broadcasting with unexpected and humorous content, challenging the contestants to entertain and engage the listeners creatively.

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Contestants' Performances

Russ Brody's Attempt

Russ Brody takes the stage first, attempting to channel the legendary sportscaster Marv Albert's energetic and precise commentary style. His performance is marked by a blend of enthusiasm and awkward humor as he navigates the explicit nature of Bret's videos.

• Notable Quote [04:25]:
  Russ Brody: "Welcome to the wild, wild world of sports. We're in anal. Oh, my God."

Russ's narration escalates as the video content becomes more graphic, pushing the boundaries of acceptable humor on morning radio.

• Notable Quote [05:03]:
  Russ Brody: "And we're still going at it again. We're going to go for a second squirt. Come on."

Despite the challenging material, Russ maintains a semblance of professionalism, albeit with a humorous and exaggerated twist that keeps the audience entertained.

Joshua's Attempt

Following Russ, Joshua steps up to deliver his play-by-play commentary. His approach is more subdued compared to Russ's flamboyant style, yet he still manages to infuse humor into the explicit content.

• Notable Quote [06:52]:
  Joshua: "All right, we're starting with some penetration. We're zoomed in, and. Oh, my goodness, there is a big slit."

Joshua's commentary takes a slightly different angle, incorporating culinary metaphors to describe the explicit scenes, adding an additional layer of comedy.

• Notable Quote [10:10]:
  Joshua: "Surely I. I play by plate."

His performance, while less intense than Russ's, still brings laughter and engages the listeners with its unique take on sportscasting.

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Host and Co-Host Reactions

John Holmberg and co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo actively participate in reacting to the contestants' performances, providing witty remarks and humorous critiques that enhance the overall entertainment value of the episode.

• Notable Quote [05:54]:
  Dale (John Holmberg): "That was gross, and I like the Cowboys tie-in. Essentially, it was the video where the two guys were having diarrhea sex."

Their candid and unscripted reactions add authenticity and relatability, making the broadcast feel like a lively conversation among friends.

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Discussion on Fetishes and Explicit Content

Beyond the contest, the episode delves into a candid discussion about various fetishes, further pushing the envelope of conventional morning radio. This segment showcases the hosts' ability to handle sensitive and taboo topics with humor and openness.

• Notable Quote [07:52]:
  Russ Brody: "So I met a woman not too long ago. First time ever meeting her, and I got to fist her."

The conversation, while explicit, is handled in a way that maintains a balance between humor and respect, engaging the audience without crossing into discomfort.

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Final Rounds and Deliberation

As the contest progresses, both contestants deliver their final performances, leading to a deliberation phase where the hosts discuss their preferences and observations.

• Notable Quote [12:05]:
  Dale (John Holmberg): "We'll have our. Yeah, that was a really good round. Matt, did you have a favorite in that? The fetish guy? Yeah. No, the other guy."

The deliberation is both humorous and insightful, reflecting on the performances with a blend of critique and camaraderie.

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Conclusion

The episode wraps up with an anticipation of the final decision, promising continued excitement and unpredictability as the ManCave Upgrade contest reaches its climax. The hosts tease future content and interactions, ensuring listeners remain engaged and eager for upcoming episodes.

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Key Takeaways

• Humorous Blend of Genres: The episode successfully merges traditional sportscasting with explicit and unconventional content, creating a unique and entertaining format.

• Engaging Host Dynamics: The chemistry among John Holmberg and his co-hosts adds depth and humor, making the discussions lively and relatable.

• Bold Content Choices: By addressing explicit content and fetishes openly, the show pushes boundaries while maintaining a comedic and engaging atmosphere.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Russ Brody [04:25]: "Welcome to the wild, wild world of sports. We're in anal. Oh, my God."

• Russ Brody [05:03]: "And we're still going at it again. We're going to go for a second squirt. Come on."

• Joshua [06:52]: "All right, we're starting with some penetration. We're zoomed in, and. Oh, my goodness, there is a big slit."

• Joshua [10:10]: "Surely I. I play by plate."

• Dale [05:54]: "That was gross, and I like the Cowboys tie-in. Essentially, it was the video where the two guys were having diarrhea sex."

• Russ Brody [07:52]: "So I met a woman not too long ago. First time ever meeting her, and I got to fist her."

• Dale [12:05]: "We'll have our. Yeah, that was a really good round. Matt, did you have a favorite in that? The fetish guy? Yeah. No, the other guy."

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This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness showcases the show's commitment to delivering bold, humorous, and engaging content, making it a standout in Arizona's morning radio landscape. Whether you're a longtime listener or new to the show, this episode promises laughter, unexpected twists, and a unique take on morning entertainment.

Transcript

[Host 1]

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[Host 2]

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[Dale]

Definitely. I think he can. You understand, right? Oh, he does. Yeah. He's not thinking that this is. Anyway, anyone who votes als Matt out should be ashamed of themselves and be on the list of the S heel of the year award. He is the winner in my eyes. Go Matt. He's a winner of all of our eyes. But let's be honest, what's he going to do with the pool table and pink bar table? At a certain point, Dale made the right choice.

[Aaron]

I mean, hey, sometimes when you're the judge and the coach, you gotta make tough decisions. You gotta sign Aaron Rodgers and say, you know what? We're gonna go.

[Dale]

We're gonna make a run.

[Aaron]

We're gonna go 7 and 10.

[Dale]

We're gonna make a run with Aaron Rodgers. Yeah, you're absolutely right. Yeah. It's like giving a guy with no arms a pool. Not doing that. I mean, you can kick around, but that's a bad idea. All right.

[Aaron]

What would you do if you're out here, 52nd street in McDowell, and all of a sudden you see ALS map pull up behind you?

[Dale]

In a car.

[Aaron]

Yeah, in a car.

[Dale]

Run the light. Getting the hell out of there. Driving. Yeah, I drag race. Chad, he still drives a little bit. He told us. Yeah, he's still driving. All right, next it's. It's a Marv Albert's birthday.

[Aaron]

Yes.

[Dale]

He's like 85, 84 years old. Did you ever meet Marv?

[Aaron]

I did not meet Marv.

[Dale]

Okay. Marv Albert, one of the classic sportscasters of all time.

[Aaron]

Yes.

[Dale]

What we do here on the show, Dale, and I think you've heard it a few times in the past, is Brett occasionally will get a strange videos, and we run these strange videos, and I do the play by play of those videos for the theater of the mind. It's not as easy as you think.

[Aaron]

No.

[Dale]

To. To pass on what is going on on these videos, which will be played here in the studio.

[Aaron]

Especially when you. Because you're doing it like radio. You're right. You're like doing. Calling a game that people can't see.

[Dale]

Yeah. You can't rely on visuals. You got to give them all the details without overstepping those details. You know, like the way Kevin tells a story. Yeah. Weave short one. Just weaves that way quick. So we have Joshua and we have Russ left.

[Aaron]

Yeah.

[Dale]

And I would like them to come in here and do the play by play for one of Brett's videos. We didn't get to watch any of Brett's videos this morning. We. One of them.

[Host 1]

We have one of them. We're going to do a callback.

[Dale]

Okay. All right. I don't like this at all. Joshua, since you're technically Dale's favorite, we'll let Russ go first. Are you familiar with Marv Albert?

[Russ]

Yes.

[Dale]

All right, this is. We're going to do your best Marv Albert impression doing play by play. We'll give him that one to one of. Put the headphones on to one of Brett's videos. Now, Dale, you must watch the video to know if he's doing a good job. Okay. All right. And everybody, please do your best to keep it down while the video plays. Keep it clean. Here we go. And yeah, don't cuss. Russ Brody doing this. This particular video. All right, go ahead and don't be gross. All right, here we go.

[Russ]

Welcome to the wild, wild world of sports. We're in anal. Oh, my God.

[Dale]

Try to describe what you're seeing without being grotesque.

[Russ]

This is a action with a little scat play. And he's really enjoying it. Dale, looking man on man. Dale. Come on, Dale.

[Dale]

Come on, Dale. Look at.

[Russ]

This is former Dallas Cowboy players.

[Dale]

And there we go. Here we go.

[Russ]

Jackpot, squirter. Yes.

[Dale]

It's a guy touchdown. I like that he. That he said it was Aikman and. And Rob.

[Russ]

There we go.

[Dale]

They're still going.

[Russ]

And we're still going at it again. We're going to go for a second squirt. Come on. Here we.

[Dale]

Oh, oh, oh.

[Russ]

He's getting up. He's getting up.

[Dale]

We're on all fours now.

[Russ]

Oh, they're straight up and going deep. Straight up and going. Come on. Bring another squirt. This is nothing.

[Dale]

Oh, have you ever done this, Russ?

[Russ]

No.

[Dale]

Okay.

[Russ]

Not yet.

[Host 1]

Not until.

[Dale]

Not yet. When he gets that game room, some of those boys will be impressed. There we go. Yes. It's still squirting up.

[Russ]

Look at Z. Got another squirt in. And he's going deep again. Dale, take a look at that. He's going for another touchdown.

[Dale]

That's right. They're driving.

[Russ]

Aaron Rodgers is going deep.

[Dale]

Don't you make fun of Aaron Rodgers. That was a bridge too far. All right, Russ. Thank you. Kind of a good job. It was gross, and I like the Cowboys tie in. Essentially, it was the video where the two guys were having diarrhea sex.

[Host 1]

Nightmare.

[Dale]

Didn't like that. Dale, now I have to tell you as a grown man. Be a grown man. Watch the videos.

[Aaron]

I'm listening to his description.

[Host 1]

No, you have to.

[Dale]

What he's doing. That's right. All right, Joshua's next. Joshua, you get the next video. We don't know.

[Host 1]

These next two are kind of short, so should we give them two videos since Russ had to go so long on this?

[Dale]

I think so.

[Host 1]

Okay, so we'll start with this one.

[Dale]

See how he's done.

[Russ]

Right.

[Dale]

And if you can do your best Marv Albert impression, if not just your best sports. All right. And. And don't be right.

[Joshua]

We've got a. A female here with super large balloons for breast riding. A black toy. Kind of interesting. She's got some piercings down There some hair down there.

[Dale]

All right. You were very, very much like I was buying some at Pottery Barn.

[Host 1]

Let's try this one.

[Joshua]

It was like gym, dance, play by play.

[Dale]

This is like a golf anal.

[Host 1]

Here's a new one.

[Dale]

Here's another one. We haven't seen this.

[Joshua]

All right, we're starting with some penetration. We're zoomed in, and. Oh, my goodness, there is a big slit. What, on this? It looks like a slit or a blister of some sort. On this gentleman's. Oh, my goodness. And now it's squirting. There is a big squirt coming out of a hole in this man's pe. He is performing coitus with a female.

[Dale]

Yes. Well done. Wow.

[Joshua]

Word of the day.

[Dale]

That was golf announcing. All right, I think that was a tie. Brett, we need a couple more videos. Oh, I got you. All right, let's get Russ back over here.

[Host 1]

Give me a second.

[Dale]

I really feel like that was dead even, Dale. And we need some more. It goes into Sudden Fetish. Yeah. All right, Russ.

[Russ]

Sudden fetish.

[Dale]

Yeah.

[Russ]

Right up my alley.

[Dale]

What is your biggest fetish, Ross?

[Russ]

Ah.

[Dale]

Like, what do you like? Like, what's a freaky. What is it? Oh, freaky thing about you. Not the most.

[Russ]

So I met a woman not too long ago. First time ever meeting her, and I got to fist her.

[Dale]

Okay.

[Russ]

Whiskey.

[Dale]

There you go. Happy Father's Day, everybody. Dale, he's one of your finalists. Joshua, you ever have that happen around the pool? Als, do you ever try to fist anybody with that paw? All right, just checking you as well. Put the dead one in. In a chip with the claw. Start smash somebody with the claw. Put a little plaster of Paris on it, and it'll go right in. All right, Here you go, Russ.

[Host 1]

One second.

[Dale]

Here's your. Okay. A breath breaking up. Oh, my God. I love this show.

[Russ]

How you doing? Where do I live?

[Aaron]

Yeah, just over there.

[Russ]

Sun City.

[Aaron]

You live.

[Dale]

Is that true?

[Russ]

Yes.

[Dale]

You live in Sun City?

[Russ]

I just moved into Sun City about three years ago.

[Aaron]

And this stuff goes on in Sun City.

[Russ]

Sun City has most. Most STDs in.

[Dale]

That's right.

[Russ]

Yeah.

[Dale]

Because of rust for the ages you brought them with. Yeah.

[Russ]

I've never had one in my entire life.

[Dale]

Brady said he's from Pfisterville, usa. All right. Really? Have you ever done that to an old lady?

[Russ]

No.

[Dale]

Okay. Just. You bring in the youth for the. And then you. Then nine people live in the house of my partners.

[Russ]

My oldest is 54. Okay, that's gross. Yeah. But. Oh, my.

[Dale]

Gosh she's gorgeous. Is she 450? Four.

[Russ]

Five. Four.

[Dale]

What's the youngest?

[Russ]

110, 26.

[Dale]

No kidding.

[Russ]

Yes.

[Richard Karn]

She's into this.

[Dale]

What did her father do to her that she lives with eight other women.

[Russ]

She has a lot of trauma.

[Dale]

I know.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Dale]

You are taking advantage of that.

[Russ]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Did you meet her?

[Russ]

She's a performance artist.

[Host 1]

I bet.

[Russ]

No, no, no.

[Dale]

What does that mean?

[Russ]

So I'm getting.

[Dale]

All right, stop it. All right, let's just do the video.

[Host 1]

You ready? Let's go old school.

[Russ]

All right, it's time.

[Dale]

Dale. Television.

[Host 1]

Dale, you got to watch this. So, you know, if he's doing it correctly.

[Dale]

Russ Brody doing one of Brett's videos. Oh, this is a classic.

[Russ]

Oh, we got a man going all the way up with a fist, and out comes. Oh, he's eating his anus.

[Dale]

Oh, my God.

[Russ]

Oh, it's his balls.

[Dale]

No, that's prolaps.

[Russ]

Yeah, it prolaps. Oh, my God.

[Dale]

And he gave it a nice.

[Russ]

Here we go. Is he gonna go? Come on. One more time.

[Dale]

Oh.

[Russ]

A kiss for the end. Dale, come bonding.

[Dale]

Dale.

[Russ]

Dale. I've kissed a guy, and I liked it.

[Dale]

Russ, walk away from the microphone.

[Aaron]

I didn't realize Caback Mountain looks so nice out the windows.

[Dale]

Will you turn around and grow up, Dale? There's just. It's just tv, for crying out loud. It's basically cartoons.

[Aaron]

Yeah. I mean. Oh.

[Dale]

All right, Joshua.

[Host 1]

Now this one. This one. Since. Since he had such an elaborate menu for. Yes, for Brady and Dale here. Let's do a little cooking.

[Dale]

Okay? A little cooking. All right.

[Aaron]

Here we go.

[Joshua]

All right, We've got a white lady here.

[Dale]

I'm Danny Speed, and I'm showing you how to make really good scrambled eggs.

[Joshua]

Some scrambled eggs on a plate. And now they are putting raw eggs in a blonde. Oh, and it's back. No. And now he's whisking the eggs. He is beating the eggs with his. With his beat stick. And in her mouth, a raw egg. And now we're back to cooking. Back to beating eggs in a blonde mouth.

[Dale]

Do you get the picture, Dale? Yeah. Well done, Dale.

[Joshua]

Surely I. I play by plate.

[Dale]

You want that dong omelette? All right, all right. Everybody leave the room. Matt, you can stay. And actually, you're fine because you're not in it anymore. Russ and man. Russ and Josh were getting it done. Damn. What?

[Aaron]

You guys are so sick.

[Richard Karn]

We're not in the videos.

[Aaron]

Yeah, no, but you guys got bigger smiles on. On your.

[Dale]

Watching you. You don't make your. And Otis. This is better than a Steelers win. This is better than a Ravens loss. This is fun. And you can watch all of this on our.

[Host 1]

Our live feed and not the videos.

[Dale]

And then. Oh, no, you're not. And then later, you can pick it up if you're not watching it now. I'm sure the videos will be available all day long until they're taken down by lawyers. All right, Dale, would you like to wait and deliberate a little bit? Let's. Let's. Let's take a break, and Dale can deliberate, and then we'll come back.

[Host 1]

That was a good round.

[Dale]

We'll have our. Yeah, that was a really good round. Matt, did you have a favorite in that? The fetish guy? Yeah. No, the other guy. Okay. Oh, Joshua. He liked Joshua. All right, Matt. If he has any two cents, that's his. All right, we'll find out who Dale is choosing next as we get down to the finals. It's 98. It's out of control now.