06-16-25 - Kirby Got Brady Soap For Fathers Day - Underwhelmed By The Military Parade Due To Bad Marching - John Loved The Manhunt For Minn Political Killer - Is Melania Alien For Not Peeing During 4 hour Parade

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode Released: June 16, 2025
Title: Kirby Got Brady Soap For Fathers Day - Underwhelmed By The Military Parade Due To Bad Marching - John Loved The Manhunt For Minn Political Killer - Is Melania Alien For Not Peeing During 4-hour Parade

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1. Celebrating Father's Day and Kirby's Unique Gift

The episode kicks off with host John Holmberg recounting his and his co-hosts' experiences of Father's Day. John shares laughs over the gifts exchanged, particularly highlighting a humorous anecdote about Kirby's unconventional Father's Day present.

John Holmberg [02:25]: "Fragrant soaps and candles. That's nice. That's sweet. That's cute. Daddy likes to soap up."

Brett Vesely discusses the practical yet unexpected gift from Kirby—fragrant body soaps, which leads to a lighthearted conversation about personal grooming habits and the quirks of gift-giving within families.

Brett Vesely [03:02]: "She got me fragrant soaps. Yep. They're not soaps. It's the body washing."

The camaraderie among the hosts fosters an engaging and relatable discussion for listeners, blending humor with the sentimentality of Father's Day.

2. Critique of the Recent Military Parade

John transitions into his critique of the recent military parade, expressing disappointment with the performance and organization.

John Holmberg [08:58]: "I was not that happy with it. First off, no nukes. Second, what's with our marching? Would you just win the World Series Army? Let's put it together."

He contrasts the parade with those of other nations, particularly praising the precision and intimidation factor of military displays from countries like China and North Korea. John emphasizes the lack of discipline and cohesion in the Arizona military parade, noting:

John Holmberg [09:22]: "It was sloppy. Like, we could have put that together in an hour."

Brett Vesely echoes John's sentiments, suggesting that the parade lacked the intensity and precision necessary to properly showcase the military's prowess.

Brett Vesely [30:14]: "The one division that was walking, that had the face camoed up, I didn't see them, but they had their sniper rifles. Super."

The hosts discuss the potential for future improvements, anticipating more impressive displays in upcoming military events.

3. Appreciation for the Minnesota Manhunt

Shifting gears, John expresses his fascination with the recent manhunt for a political killer in Minnesota. He delves into the procedural aspects and the excitement surrounding the capture.

John Holmberg [19:03]: "I love manhunts. A big weekend's worth of manhunting. It's great stuff."

He recounts the methodical search and eventual capture of the suspect, highlighting the efficiency and dedication of law enforcement.

John Holmberg [21:31]: "They had some deer urine all over him. And they brought him his own urine. Right. Who goes home after that?"

The discussion underscores the intricate strategies used in modern manhunts and commends the authorities for their successful resolution of the case.

4. Speculations on Melania Trump's Parade Behavior

One of the more entertaining and controversial segments revolves around Melania Trump's behavior during a four-hour parade. John humorously speculates on the First Lady's unusual ability to remain seated and not use the restroom during an extended public appearance.

John Holmberg [14:03]: "She sat in that spot and didn't move unless she had to stand up for four hours."

He further conjectures about the possibility of her using a double to maintain her composure and appearance, weaving in conspiracy theories with humor.

John Holmberg [16:05]: "There's rumors out there that Melania doesn't attend any of these events, that the girl that we see is not the real Melania."

The conversation takes a playful jab at the public's fascination with celebrity lifestyles and the challenges of maintaining poise under scrutiny.

John Holmberg [35:12]: "Melania Trump has solved it. Never pees, never gone."

The hosts engage in a lighthearted debate about the logistics and plausibility of maintaining such an image, blending humor with observational commentary.

5. Additional Highlights and Banter

Throughout the episode, the hosts intersperse their discussions with humorous banter and personal anecdotes. From John's mishaps riding a bike while tipsy after a baseball game to debates over the quality of the national anthem performance at the parade, the dialogue is lively and relatable.

John Holmberg [27:08]: "I had a pee or fake it or stretch or something. They didn't budge."

These segments add depth to the episode, showcasing the hosts' chemistry and ability to navigate various topics with humor and insight.

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Notable Quotes:

• John Holmberg [02:25]: "Fragrant soaps and candles. That's nice. That's sweet. That's cute. Daddy likes to soap up."
• John Holmberg [08:58]: "I was not that happy with it. First off, no nukes. Second, what's with our marching?"
• John Holmberg [19:03]: "I love manhunts. A big weekend's worth of manhunting. It's great stuff."
• John Holmberg [14:03]: "She sat in that spot and didn't move unless she had to stand up for four hours."
• John Holmberg [35:12]: "Melania Trump has solved it. Never pees, never gone."

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This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness delivers a blend of humor, critical analysis, and engaging discussions, making it a compelling listen for those interested in Arizona's local happenings, political events, and lighthearted celebrity commentary.

Transcript

[Byron]

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[Dick Toledo]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[Wayne]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[Wayne]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[Wayne]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[Wayne]

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[Dick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

You thought that was funny?

[Larry McFeely]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it.

[John Holmberg]

What the hell is wrong with you? Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Monday it is the post Father's day morning sickness. It's 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett. There's Big Dick Toledo let's get this thing going, shall we? Lovely fathers. Hope you had a good. Brett and I had great Father's Day yesterday. Yes. Zero disappointment.

[Byron]

High five.

[John Holmberg]

None. You, Brady. What was your date lavished with prizes? We're all curious.

[Brett]

Had a lovely steak dinner last night.

[John Holmberg]

Who cooked it?

[Brett]

Ronnie.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding? Yeah, on the grill.

[Brett]

She did them in the oven.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Okay.

[Brett]

That's what I told her. She asked me.

[John Holmberg]

She's not allowed to touch her grill. Yeah, but did she say anything about how Kirby forgot Mother's Day for her? Was there a reference to this?

[Brett]

No. Kirby just had to spend the day in the room. In her room? All day. Wouldn't come out. She wasn't laughing at Father's Day.

[John Holmberg]

Right. So she didn't overdo it for you after she skipped. Did she get you something?

[Brett]

Yes, she did. And she got me.

[John Holmberg]

Man, that hurts. That's a stinger.

[Brett]

My favorite bath soaps. Body scrub.

[John Holmberg]

Wait, what? Is that real?

[Brett]

Kind of.

[John Holmberg]

What?

[Brett]

No, she just. Basically, she knows the stuff that I use on the body wash from Bath and Bodies Works. I think that's works.

[John Holmberg]

She got you fragrant soaps.

[Brett]

Yep. They're not soaps. It's the body washing.

[John Holmberg]

Like this. The liquid soap. And then on a loofah.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And you scrub.

[Brett]

Where do you scrub up? All over.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding. You lo. For your skin.

[Byron]

Feel like I'm listening to Izzy in the morning.

[John Holmberg]

I was going to say that's a little bit surprising. Not going to lie. Little insight into you. Converted.

[Brett]

Converted. About maybe two years ago.

[John Holmberg]

Why? On a little. On those little soft scrunchies or like the hard ones. The hard scrubs? Yeah. You put on the soft one and you hang it over the little.

[Brett]

Like washing a car.

[John Holmberg]

What color is your little shammy?

[Brett]

Orange.

[John Holmberg]

You got an orange one and it's the soft, like, net one. They've got like that meshy.

[Brett]

It looks like a sea urchin.

[John Holmberg]

It's kind of adorable in a way.

[Byron]

So no more Irish Spring for you?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, just no more.

[Brett]

They make it in a liquid soap.

[John Holmberg]

Sure, sure. But you just like to. You like to lather up.

[Brett]

Yeah, I like the current summer one that I. Ocean. It's called ocean.

[John Holmberg]

So Mother's Day. Absolutely nothing. Father's Day. Fragrant soaps and candles. That's nice. That's sweet. That's cute. Daddy likes to soap up. And she knew.

[Brett]

She also helped me move the storage facility from one I had to transfer.

[John Holmberg]

From one storage thing to another.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

A bunch of stuff you're not using into another room to Pay for a bigger one, probably.

[Brett]

Bigger one?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You've upgraded your. Your hoarding.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

What's in there now? Not a generator.

[Brett]

We know that Christmas and Halloween stuff.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brett]

Which has gotten a little out of hand.

[John Holmberg]

Do you still do the Halloween? I thought you gave all that to Laser when he took over.

[Brett]

The neighborhood loves Halloween.

[John Holmberg]

All right. See, I went to the baseball game yesterday with Doug Hopkins. We drank all day.

[Brett]

That was on Saturday, though.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Okay. Well, you had a full weekend. Yeah, I went. I went yesterday. I've had, like, this weird, like, groin pull type thing. The only thing that feels good is riding my bike. So I said, screw it. I'll ride my bike tomorrow. And I wrote it downtown and then, you know, drank with Doug for a little bit and then riding it back. Woof. I've been better off driving. It's just. It's hard to do that when you're a little tipsy on a bicycle. It was fun, though.

[Brett]

I spent Sunday with Hopkins as well.

[John Holmberg]

You did?

[Brett]

Yeah, probably 50 times watching the golf.

[John Holmberg]

He's strong on the commercials, right? He's buying a lot of time. Smart on that, man. Yep, he was on it. I was watching with him at the. After the game, we went over to that little bar that's next to the stadium. Not The Guy Fieri 1. A real place crown, I think it's called. And we're hanging out there and watching the golf and. And yeah, Hopkins pops on three or four times while we're in there. It's pretty funny.

[Byron]

Does he sing along when the commercial's on?

[John Holmberg]

Everyone does. It was amazing. With the whole bar in on, it was like. It was like an Irish bar. We all got. It was like a pub. We all got going. Yeah. But, yeah, a hoof and a bike. And the heat doesn't bother me so much. And was surprised how many people were in that yesterday. Like, they were actually walking around doing stuff. I'm like, well, nobody's really being stymied by the heat. I had to go around a lot of people, but it was.

[Brett]

Did you get a golf shirt on the.

[John Holmberg]

No, I don't. I don't like that stuff. I like that. You know why? We sat in the third base dugouts. And here's the thing. There was a girl there, and she kept lifting the same boy up in the third base dugouts. Over the dugout edge.

[Byron]

Had me excited when she said, she's lifting.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I know. That would have been great. Yeah, she would have killed it.

[Brett]

Show the kids.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, one kid got like three baseballs The Diamondbacks don't pay attention to who they're giving the ball to. Coming off the field, they just pop, throwing. Like you kids holding two baseballs. And they hand him another one, crushing it. They just killed it yesterday. Killed it. It was pretty awesome. But at the same time, it's like, how many can we get before the Diamondbacks are like, we've given you enough. They don't pay attention. They don't care. And then they started to chuck their Father's Day wristbands in. And people lose their minds over that stuff. Laundry. The baseball thing was pretty impressive. Then the kid got a little cocky, and other kids in there were like, can I have one? He's like, no. And he had. You know, he had a bullpen's worth of baseballs juggling. Yeah. The kid was learning. He'd lose one, didn't care. I'll get another. Lifted him up as often as they could, and he got as many baseballs as you could possibly imagine. But, yeah, it was pretty. It was a pretty nice day. Father's Day was packed up. Packed full. I'm going to say this. Whoever sang the national anthem yesterday, not very good. Yeah. Not going to go down that route.

[Brett]

Go the other way.

[John Holmberg]

Nope. Not very good. I don't know who did it, but the dude was just dead flat on every other. Trying to harmonize. Like, we gotta get. We gotta get something going on. These national anthems that are a little bit. I don't know. Or more. The hiring process is not good right now. I mean, let's get Jesse McGuire out there. He never misses a note. But the sing song, he won. And people clapped after. But I was looking around like, did we not hear the same thing? That dude missed every single note.

[Brett]

It used to be 93 dads, but.

[John Holmberg]

Which. Yeah. Oh, that's KDKB. Yeah. 93 dads is impossible now. Now it's 93 bears and they don't have Bears Day. Yeah. When KDKB was a heterosexual station, they would drag 93 fathers out there and sing. 93 dads would sing the national anthem. And you can't. With 93 people. It can't be that bad. I'll tell you what, though, two. One of them's way off key. That dude is not feeling good today, I guarantee you. And you know who hates him the most? The woman that he practiced with for the last month trying to get all those harmonies right. He was.

[Brett]

I am so sore.

[John Holmberg]

Dead flat the whole time. And it's just. I noticed these things because you know, I care. On the heels of Flag Day and that. Awesome. Here's something I learned.

[Brett]

Did you get to watch?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I did, and I was not that happy with it. First off, no nukes. Second, what's with our marching? Would you just win the World Series Army? Let's put it together. Walking around, it was sloppy. Like, we could have put that together in an hour. I'm not saying our army guys aren't badass, but I need to see some of that uniform North Korea stuff if we're going to have a military parade.

[Brett]

Put some guys like, hey, put on a uniform. Get out here.

[John Holmberg]

It was like actors and stuff.

[Brett]

It was an option. You could wave or salute.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they were waving. Like there was.

[Brett]

Yeah, they. They had some decorum on it, but.

[John Holmberg]

Well, it was a whole bunch of stripes. I said that while I'm watching. I'm like, this is stripes. These guys just got up out of that hangar and ran to the military. Sweetheart, salute. What, did you get across the road? Who exactly are you guys? Razzle dazzle. These are Sergeant Hawkins, man.

[Brett]

They did pull up the mobile stage and did a jam.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they had some cool stuff, but, like, the tanks were cool and I like them. I've wanted a military parade since I was a little kid. It's. I've never seen one in America. I like missiles. I like that. I saw that one in San Diego when they were just dragging some cool stuff down that center street in Coronado, and I was blown away at the fourth of July. Prick. I'm like, this needs to be amped up. But then the army comes walking by and all their. And they're none of them like, trying to.

[Brett]

It wasn't, you know, tighten it up. Yeah, you. I think we're. We're seeing the precision marching. Maybe I'm wrong, but maybe the Marines concentrate on that.

[John Holmberg]

I think the army can precision march too. And I think, you know, you know, your competition when China puts on a military parade. You think China didn't, like, show that to their people and say, look at this. And then you see our guys are the Chinese people. It looks like AI made it. They're all in lockstep. Our guys are shuffling and loafing around.

[Brett]

A couple, you know, a couple groups are pretty good with a quick look at the press.

[John Holmberg]

And then I need more than what we got. That's for sure. I was disappointed. And no nukes. Come on. That's the whole purpose of us. We roll nukes down the street like we got your ass. You want to play with us? Here, look, we just got these laying around. I'm not a Warhawk, but if we're gonna have one, let's have one. These guys just walking around like it's leave on a Friday.

[Dick Toledo]

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[Byron]

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[Dick Toledo]

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[Byron]

Well, it sounds like MMP Guns is committed to providing the customers with the best possible service and selection.

[Dick Toledo]

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[John Holmberg]

Homeburg's morning sickness. And then here's the other thing that I was blown away at. And there are some conspiracy theories about this. Melania Trump is a 55 year old woman, right? She never has to pee. She sat in that spot and didn't move unless she had to stand up for four hours.

[Brett]

Her seat is a toilet.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I'm wondering. I'm wondering what the, what the hookup is. There is no woman on the planet that cannot. Four hours all dolled up. And Trump too. Trump never got up to pee and he's 80. What's going on? What's the secret here? Do they get tubes? Are we tied to something? Because there's no possible way a woman especially can go 4 hours without wrecking the whole thing at the most crucial moment. I have got to pee. Donald. The nukes we're about. What are you doing? Walk me to the bathroom. Come on. That. I'll be right back. And then he leaves with her.

[Brett]

Do the doubles come in without us seeing it?

[John Holmberg]

That's what I wondered. There's doubles. There's no question there's doubles. The bathroom situation made me realize that they never once shot that spot where those two hadn't, you know, they were in the exact same place. And then where do they go? It would be like a commotion of secret service and movement if either of them got up to walk away. And they would have to stop the whole parade if Trump and Melania went away for a second. Because everybody's like doing it for, you know, to march in front of the.

[Brett]

President and he swore in the new class. That was kind of cool.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that was neat. But still, look, you're looking for all the positives. There was a lot wrong with that parade.

[Byron]

Question is, does she break out chapstick 10 times during.

[John Holmberg]

I've never watched her. Chapstick. Yeah. Who is wrong? She's a superwoman. She's not real. There's nothing, nothing about her is human or real. She looks great. Hologram. She never changes. She's like always the exact same face, like there's no emotion. And she never has to pee. And you're right. Not once does Donald do. I see Donald reach into his front pocket and pull out chapstick that he has to hold because she doesn't want bulges in her. In her dress. You have to hold it. You have pockets. I don't want to hold it. Here's my tissue, too. Good.

[Brett]

Do you have my id?

[John Holmberg]

This is garbage. Yeah, there's another one. Your id, your tissue, your.

[Byron]

And your debit card.

[John Holmberg]

Your debit card that you aren't using. Don't worry about it. And your chapstick. Where's the damn chat? And some gum sometimes. Gum.

[Byron]

Can you hold my chapstick? You have pockets, too.

[John Holmberg]

Always have. Well, she had a tight dress on, I'll give her that, but never had to pee.

[Brett]

She looked good.

[John Holmberg]

Never once. She always looks good. She never had to pee. And they're saying that there is a double. There's rumors out there that Melania doesn't attend any of these events, that the girl that we see is not the real Melania. And I'm wondering, please stand up. Where has she always been? Like, this woman's life has had to have been spectacular to look like Melania Trump and not be Melania Trump, and then to get the job in 2016 as her double and have it for 10 solid years and going forward more. And now they don't even use the real Melania anymore. Is the rumor that this is the only one we get? I'm all in on that, too. It's crazy. But first things first. Let's get that army out there practicing some marching, because that was ragtag at best. I did like how they dressed up soldiers as, like, the first army, and they put them in the wigs and the old, you know, revolutionary stuff. And then the evolution of the uniforms. That was kind of neat. But military parade, we got to tighten that up. If we. I've seen China and their military parades and those high kicks and the wave is, like, all in unison. And they look like they. They're scary. They're intimidating. Like, they're like. These guys are machines. Our guys just look like, you know, they're getting free college. That's about all I saw.

[Brett]

I was curious about the coverage from various TV stations. Just see how they handled it. And it was interesting because the ones that would handle it, they put split screen. They show the no kings protesting and then the parade, which was kind of. And they'd concentrate on that more so than the other.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, the protests that Happened here was wisely happened at like 7, 8 in the morning, which was a good, good move on the no kings part. We're all for the social movement, but let's not sweat it out, shall we? Let's keep it out of the heat. I did a good job. They were going to do it at night too. I didn't see anything ride my bike back last night. I didn't see any protests or anything. Was fairly peaceful. Lovely ride. Absolutely nobody out. It was wonderful at night, which was weird. The daytime people were walking all over. Nighttime. It was a it. Another thing I think I discovered I love because of this weekend outside of military parades, which I think we should have. God, I can't wait for next July 4th when the country turns 250 on its own. If that fireworks display we got Saturday for the army's birthday was any indicator, we're going to. Everybody's going to lose a hand for the 4th of July here because this thing's going to blow up. We're going to. We're getting nuked.

[Brett]

Hold your hands up.

[John Holmberg]

We're getting nukes next year for our parade. There better be the Marines and the Air Force will fly over and we'll have the Thunderbirds and the Blue Angels and Navy guys and all of them. We're doing some marching next year.

[Brett]

That like hundred yard, just explosive flame stuff.

[John Holmberg]

Awesome. Yeah, all of it. We're going to blow up everything on tv. It's going to be great. I also discovered this weekend that I love me a manhunt. I don't like why they happen like that dude that shot those people in Minnesota. It's tragic. But then the manhunt happened and that's the news at its best.

[Brett]

Got him the traditional way.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Like a deer hunter.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Trail camera.

[John Holmberg]

Yep. And they got him in some field.

[Brett]

On his own farm.

[John Holmberg]

On his own farm. They didn't stray far. They had. They were searching all of Minnesota. Guy was outside out back just tending to the cattle. The. Remember the manhunt that happened here when those two dudes escaped from the prison that Toledo's wife was in? And they got out and then that dude got tased in the back and he just froze in that field. They were running across that field. I fell in love with manhunts that day because that, that was like a couple of days of searching for bad guys. Manhunts are awesome because I realize while I'm watching this is going to be future entertainment for me down the road. I'm going to watch a special or two or three on Netflix about this very event. And what I'm seeing is like the teaser, the trailer, the actual manhunt is the trailer. When we start getting all the footage and stuff and the body cams and then what's going on behind the scenes and what they knew and where he kind of thought that's what, like the Luigi Mangioni manhunt that went on for a couple days. That's gonna be a great special. That's going to be a great special. Probably a two parter, maybe a three parter. Didn't last that long. This was this thing that happened over the weekend. Two parter. You get the build up of who the guy was, then the end of episode one is his action, and then he goes on the run for episode two and how they had him. The manhunt that happened in the Boston bombing, if you've ever watched any of that, oh, my God, is that a thrill ride? Terrible event, but I like manhunts in a big way. That sounds gay, but it's true. I like a manhunt. A big weekend's worth of manhunting. It's great stuff. But they got him last yesterday and they caught him. Yeah, in his backyard, basically in a field and a deer stand. Yeah, they were in like a block.

[Brett]

Broke down for the deer feed out front. There's a pile, and they lured them out there.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they had some. Some the deer urine all over him. And they brought him his own urine. Right. Who goes home after that? Like. Like the weird thing.

[Brett]

That's what I was wondering. It's like, how much did he have? Was he planning on, you know, escaping? Didn't sound like he was like. Well, but maybe he wanted to do some more, you know, enough acreage on his property that he could disappear for.

[John Holmberg]

Not very well. Evidently not, because he didn't disappear very well. I. But he went home, and I think that means he was not done yet. Like, he stayed close to his comfort and he didn't. Like, he surrendered, but it wasn't. It wasn't like, right away. I always look at that with Mangione, that Luigi, everybody's like, you know, I've talked to people who are Luigi fans, and I always remind him, like, he's a coward. Oh, my God, you could shoot them. Like, no, no. I'm not saying his actions were justified or unjustified. I'm saying there's no question about it. It is inarguable that Luigi Mangione is a coward. He shot someone in the back and then he ran away. If you're a. If you're a political activist to the point where you're gonna commit murder or you're trying to take a stand and you're a martyr, you stand there with your hands up after you commit the crime and say, this is why I did it. You don't run away. You don't leave. And you certainly don't shoot someone in.

[Byron]

The back, shoot him in the face.

[John Holmberg]

If you don't, you do like the mob does. Turn around. Now, the mob guys hide. That's cowardly. But they shoot you in the face, they shoot you in the back. Their own guys get mad. You don't shoot a man in the back. And. And, yeah, so, I mean, I look at that kind of stuff. I don't. Once you start running, that's fear. That's coward. So this dude's sort of a coward, too. But he went home. I went looking all over for him, but then when they got him at home, I was like, that guy wasn't done yet. That's crazy. Flat out crazy. All that during the marches and super parade we had going on. Melania not peeing once.

[Byron]

No. Chapstick.

[John Holmberg]

Find me one woman out there that can sit for four hours, sit still for four hours, not even get up and walk around for no reason or go find something to eat or come back with a churro. Like, when in the world did you ever see Trump? Like, for four hours, nobody even gave him a churro or anything. Like, he didn't like everybody Dr. Pepper or something.

[Brett]

Think of nachos or something.

[John Holmberg]

They didn't have drinks.

[Dick Toledo]

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[Byron]

Hey Byron, I heard you have something new to announce from MMP Guns.

[Dick Toledo]

Brett. I sure do. It's MMP Guns Customs. MMP Guns is creating some amazing firearms. We offer polishing, plating, bluing, custom laser engraving, laser stippling, cerakoting and performance upgrades. We do everything in house with our master trained craftsmen. You can select our designs or make up your own.

[Byron]

Well, can you do this to my gun?

[Dick Toledo]

We can do it to nearly any firearm. Doesn't matter where you live it to us or we already have completed firearms in inventory daily with no wait.

[Byron]

Well, there you have it. MMP Guns on the northeast corner of 12th street and Indian School or online at MMP Guns customs.com all right, HMS.

[Brady]

Podcast time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Head north to catch Michael Longfellow sets Friday through Sunday at the Desert Ridge Improv. The east side features Jonathan Kite this Friday through Sunday at the Tempe Improv. And from Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul Famous, the multi talented Laval Crawford performing Friday and Saturday night downtown at Stand Up Live. For the complete lineups and for Tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and Tempe improv.comberg's Morning Sickness.

[John Holmberg]

They're not human. They're human. Some, yeah, just see somebody hammering something.

[Brett]

Loving the Dogzilla.

[John Holmberg]

That was one of the funniest parts of the Naked Gun. The original is when they, you know, the queen is in that box and she's passing down hot dogs. Next thing you know, she's hammering one. And like, you never see that. You never see the officials crush a hoagie. They're in a parade, for crying out loud. One churro, a soda.

[Brett]

Worst parade ever to sit through it.

[John Holmberg]

Would be for them for four.

[Brett]

The whole stance.

[John Holmberg]

They can't move. I didn't see a waiter. I mean, yesterday at the Diamondbacks game, I had peanuts. I had two drinks, some water. I was running that lady raggedy. Everybody in that box that we were in went pee at least once. At least once. It's a three hour baseball game. Four hours of watching dudes march. I'm getting up at least once. I got a pee or fake it or stretch or something. They didn't budge. They have the.

[Byron]

The server come over every so often for new beers or anything. Had to be like he didn't. He didn't get up to go get.

[John Holmberg]

Beers during like you would think that you would see.

[Brett]

I don't think I saw him even take a sip of out of a water bot bottle.

[John Holmberg]

Pete Hegseth was next to him. So you can't really have beers flowing. Right. That's a bad. The Democrats will eat that alive. But yeah a water something never once. And you know Trump wanted one. You know Trump wanted a. A hot dog or what are they serving. Go find me. Go find me something delicious that won't mess up my suit. Just a napkin in his Stella something. I gotta have some pop. I don't know. This is brutal. And he had to I. Trump had to be a little upset about the laissez faire nature of the marching. I think he expected one of those Russian or Chinese marches going by and he got like the military on. On leave. But it was kind of neat again more missiles next time we know now more nukes. A couple of massive like long range super nukes that like a quarter mile long. Just humongous.

[Brett]

I thought they might have stopped you know just like to do the Macy Day Parade. Yeah Do a little number or something. I thought they might do some drill stuff or.

[John Holmberg]

Cool.

[Brett]

Doing that great rifle toss.

[John Holmberg]

Awesome. Yeah Put on display.

[Brett]

But I guess that's not the arm.

[John Holmberg]

They were busy. I don't. I think it is the army stripes. They don't put that together. Yeah stripes put. You're exactly right. And that's just to get out of boot camp. You got it. That's fine marching sir. It's like they know it was brutal.

[Byron]

But the EM50 show up too.

[Brett]

They had a couple of SUV buggies.

[John Holmberg]

That are well they showed like a dune buggy that had had launchers 360 degrees. I'm like I a that needs to be available to the general public.

[Brett]

And those other. That armored armored vehicles that had multiple pipes coming out. Is that exhaust?

[John Holmberg]

No that's what I was looking. They're just. I think they just break crappy bad guys. Yeah no that's it's. It's boy hard on stuff. I don't think chicks understood that the inner boy and all helicopters over your head. Dude. We can't watch those toys roll down a real street in front of the White House and not turn into 5 year olds like that was army men and it was pretty awesome. Just a little tighter on the marching next time when 250 rolls around for the country next year, you're up against Marines, army, you guys start marching it out a little better. I want some. I don't like that high kick one. I don't know why Chinese like Asian military. They all do that high straight leg march. Very Nazi. Very, very German. But I like a tight.

[Brett]

But it is precise.

[John Holmberg]

Precise. We didn't have that angular. Nothing. Not. Not even close.

[Brett]

They had a cadence going.

[John Holmberg]

Well, they were marching. There's no doubt that it was floppy.

[Brett]

See the guy barking back there?

[John Holmberg]

I think because we're so used to seeing military parades from communist nations and bad guys and they keep it tight and that's just on display for us. They're not doing that for themselves. That's to get footage of their military being over prepared for everything and in unison for us. It's intimidating to us now.

[Brett]

The one division that was walking, that had the face camoed up, I didn't see them, but they had their sniper rifles.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's pretty awesome.

[Brett]

Super.

[John Holmberg]

But we're gigantic. Tight on it. I didn't see them tight marching.

[Brett]

Well, you didn't question being these guys are walking, the intensity.

[John Holmberg]

I'm not saying that, you know, our guys aren't badass. Tighten it up a little bit. So I always thought it was like discipline, discipline, discipline. That was the military. I didn't see a whole lot of that. Saw a lot of sloppy. And again, military guys will email in. Sean, you don't understand, like. No, no, no, you don't understand. The general public is like me more than they're like you. And so you needed to. They needed to put on a show to make everybody feel like, you know, we're up against the other Taiwanese armies and stuff. March better than that guy says that. Rifle toss and silent cadence teams are marines. Okay. Either way, 250 comes up next year. It's gonna be great. It says, you have to Remember, John, the U.S. army is one of the most lethal killing machines on the planet. Chinese, North Koreans are just marching bands. That's why they look so good. Can't we be both? Can't we be a, like you say.

[Brett]

A lethal killing machine who can march division? That's all they do.

[John Holmberg]

Great. Let's top them there too. Let's be better than a couple hundred.

[Brett]

I'll take 2,000.

[John Holmberg]

Imagine that. We're a lethal killing machine who also marches better than you. I mean, if that's all you're good at, let's be better at that too. I saw sloppy and this Is what I wanted. Feel great. This would have been awesome. This is what we watched on Saturday. They trained all night for that. Just one day. That's all it took. I would have pissed myself if this happened. One, Boom shakalaka. And I'd have been thrilled. Two. Boom shackalakalaka. Boom shackalakalaka. Boom shackalakalaka. All right, that's the military parade I need.

[Brett]

Go getters. I'm looking for.

[John Holmberg]

Where is your sergeant? Load up, sir. Ah. That is a military parade. Damn it. Anyway. And I just, you know, I've seen first ladies with the initiative to get kids to read or physical fitness for four year olds. And I think being first lady is the easiest job in the world. It is. Without question. You pick a topic nobody hates. Like, their initiatives are always like, who's against? Like, kids reading. Nobody. Who's against. Yeah, just say no. Yeah, just say no. Physical fitness, like, no. You know, wants kids to be healthy and able to read and off drugs. That's easy. Melania, you need to step it up. Write some sort of book. How to keep broads from pissing every five minutes on car trips and at, you know, long events. Thus, second, I've ever sat down at a table for any event ever. Somebody touches me, I'm gonna ping. You're an adult. What are you gonna carry? You. I'll wait. No, because I'm gonna hear about it the whole time. You're a dog with a tennis ball the second your bladder goes, hey, guess what? It's all they think about. Melania has solved it. Never pees, never gone. Like, you'd never get a shot of the president and she's gone. We'd all know. Every man be like, oh, she must have to pee. Because they always have to pee. Or apply chapstick. Like, Brett's dead.

[Byron]

That's true.

[John Holmberg]

One, not one reapply in four hours. And she looked as good at the beginning of the night as she did at the end of the night.

[Brett]

She had to sneak that when they'd have caught it.

[John Holmberg]

You think that if MSNBC had a camera on anything, it's on. When Melania left, Left so they could get that shot of that empty chair so they can come back and go, she hates him. She leaves. They would have been all over it. She can't leave his side. The left media would kill her.

[Byron]

Or even reapplying.

[John Holmberg]

Reapply. One shot of her reapplying and all the cameras in the world. She didn't do it.

[Brett]

That's why she's a superwoman custom made first lady lipstick.

[John Holmberg]

Let's get it out to the. Sell them. Get it out to the masses. And whatever piss tank she's got taped to the back of her thigh, let's get one of those. Going to first lady Beeswax.

[Byron]

Oh, I will buy it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh my God.

[Byron]

I will buy it.

[John Holmberg]

Road trip, piss buckets. Melania Trump's rose it Suction cups right onto the old urethra. Fires right through, ladies.

[Byron]

And one application chapstick. I'm in.

[John Holmberg]

I'll buy. I don't care what side of the political aisle you're on, ladies. You need to be more like Melania in so many ways. In so many ways.

[Brett]

Graceful.

[John Holmberg]

I've never seen her in sweatpants either. She seems to always try and graceful. Brady's right. Graceful. Oh, you clumsy clauds out there wandering around in your uggs. Let's get it together, ladies. Tighten it up. Fix your face. Fix your face. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? 585-9800. A good one. We're gonna practice marching today. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up. Arizona's most powerful, powerful radio station.

[Unknown]

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