Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: June 19, 2025 - Guest: Former Dallas Cowboy Offensive Lineman Dale Hellestrae
Release Date: June 19, 2025
Hosted By: John Holmberg
Assisted By: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo

Introduction of the Guest

John Holmberg welcomes former Dallas Cowboy Offensive Lineman Dale Hellestrae back to the show, highlighting Dale's penchant for providing candid and often critical insights. The conversation begins with light-hearted banter about Dale's interactions with others and his general disposition towards things he dislikes.

The $10 Billion Sale of the Los Angeles Lakers

The primary focus of the episode centers around the unprecedented sale of the Los Angeles Lakers for $10 billion. Dale and the hosts delve into the implications of such a monumental transaction in the sports industry.

• Dale Hellestrae expresses skepticism about the valuation:

  "I think the Cowboys have jumped up to 20, 25 [billion]." [04:38]

• John Holmberg questions the feasibility of the buyer's financial capacity:

  "What does he do? How do you get all this money?" [05:08]

Comparison with Other Sports Franchises

The discussion broadens to include comparisons with other major sports franchises, particularly the Dallas Cowboys and the St. Louis Cardinals.

• Dale points out the rarity of franchise sales outside familial ownership:

  "Very few times. Usually stays in families and all that. So when one does come up, the valuation goes out the window." [05:10]

• They also discuss the St. Louis Cardinals, suggesting that Forbes' valuation might be understated:

  "If the Cardinals are 4 billion according to Forbes, there's no possible way..." [06:00]

Scrutinizing the Lakers' Buyer

The conversation shifts to the identity and financial background of the Lakers' buyer, raising concerns about his ability to sustain such a massive investment.

• John Holmberg highlights the buyer's connection to the Dodgers and questions his net worth:

  "His personal net worth is less than 10 years. Matt Ishby has said when he wrote the check for the Sons, it was a $4 billion hit to his account." [09:23]

• Richard Karn adds context about the buyer's professional background:

  "He manages Guggenheim and Partners, which is a portfolio of 300 billion." [09:14]

Speculations on Financial Sustainability

Dale and the hosts speculate on how the buyer plans to manage such an extensive financial commitment, considering his current net worth and business obligations.

• Dale Hellestrae questions the sustainability:

  "Is he paying a mortgage on this, going to pay out over 15 years?" [09:40]

• John Holmberg expresses doubt about the accuracy of reported figures:

  "Jay Moore is rather drowning in this deal." [10:09]

Humorous Banter: What He'd Do for a Billionaire Wife

Shifting gears, the conversation takes a humorous turn as the hosts discuss what Dale would do if he were to marry a billionaire. This segment is filled with playful jabs and exaggerated scenarios.

• John Holmberg jokes about cosmetic surgeries for his billionaire wife:

  "She'll get a rhinoplasty, anything she wants. If she wants me to get a dick surgically implanted where my nose used to be, she's getting it." [11:06]

• Dale Hellestrae responds with sarcasm:

  "I want her to ask for a toupee, a nose...ladimir!" [11:14]

Personal Anecdotes and Football Memories

Dale shares personal stories from his football career, recounting intense moments on the field and rivalries that shaped his experiences.

• Dale Hellestrae reminisces about playing against Ray Childress:

  "I grabbed his face mask and tried to twist his head off. I got it around pretty good." [29:17]

• John Holmberg adds humor to the story:

  "Attempted murder has no statute of limitations." [29:35]

Commentary on Current Sports Figures

The hosts provide critical commentary on contemporary sports figures, including debates about quarterbacks and defensive players.

• John Holmberg defends Aaron Rodgers despite rumors about his personal life:

  "Football players are weirdos." [21:12]

• Dale Hellestrae discusses Kyler Murray's role in the Pittsburgh Steelers:

  "He should have been cut; he needs a shot." [30:06]

• Richard Karn and Dale Hellestrae critique other players, emphasizing the importance of performance over personal conduct.

Light-Hearted Moments and Inside Jokes

Throughout the episode, the hosts engage in playful teasing and inside jokes, adding a layer of humor to the discussions.

• John Holmberg teases Dale about his appearance and social media presence:

  "If you Google Dale Holster, it'll come up. Type in hell, and you'll see Dale's face." [35:43]

• Dale Hellestray counters with jabs at the hosts:

  "You guys were taking the whole team out for ice cream. You never drove us anywhere." [21:35]

Closing Thoughts on Sports Valuations and Future Implications

As the episode nears its end, the hosts reflect on the future of sports franchise valuations and the potential impacts of such high-profile sales.

• Dale Hellestrae muses about the sustainability of multi-billion dollar franchises:

  "It's crazy. It's insane. But it can't sustain itself. I remember when they thought million-dollar players would bankrupt baseball." [17:09]

• John Holmberg draws parallels between past and present financial decisions in sports:

  "Look at Eric Dickerson; he was told he'd never make a million dollars in the NFL. Now players are making $60 million a year." [18:02]

Notable Quotes

• "What does he do? How do you get all this money?" — John Holmberg [05:08]
• "Your personal net worth is less than 10 years." — John Holmberg [09:23]
• "Football players are weirdos." — John Holmberg [21:12]
• "I give my wife some. Why not?" — John Holmberg [13:19]

Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness offers a blend of serious discussions on the astronomical valuations in the sports industry, particularly the Lakers' $10 billion sale, intertwined with humor and personal anecdotes from Dale Hellestrae's football career. The hosts provide insightful critiques on current sports figures and the financial dynamics that underpin major sports franchises. For listeners interested in the intersection of sports, finance, and candid conversations, this episode delivers a comprehensive and engaging experience.