06-20-25 - Crackdown Emails On Our Sloppy Kitchen - Our Sales Staff Is Having A Slump Buster Sale Internally Not Knowing What It Means - Passion Shooting At Desert Ridge Has Us Wondering If Love Or Hate Causes More Murders

Summary

Summary of Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: June 20, 2025
Host/Author: 98KUPD | Hubbard Radio
Release Date: June 20, 2025

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Holmberg's Morning Sickness is Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, where host John Holmberg, along with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo, engage listeners with a mix of entertainment, questioning, and sometimes disturbing topics. In the June 20, 2025 episode titled "Crackdown Emails On Our Sloppy Kitchen - Our Sales Staff Is Having A Slump Buster Sale Internally Not Knowing What It Means - Passion Shooting At Desert Ridge Has Us Wondering If Love Or Hate Causes More Murders," the hosts delve into workplace hygiene issues, critique questionable sales strategies, and discuss the psychological motivations behind violent crimes.

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I. Workplace Cleanliness Issues

The episode kicks off with a heated discussion about the state of cleanliness in the radio station's kitchen. Susan, the head of the sales department, has sent out stern emails addressing the unclean microwave, leading to frustration among the staff.

• John Holmberg highlights the severity of the issue:

  "Evidently, it is time for Susan to break out the big guns in the email and call everybody pigs and disgusting human beings." ([00:19])

• Brady Bogen adds context about the malfunctioning office toilet, emphasizing the neglect of shared facilities:

  "It's just not clicking. You can't flush the toilet. It's not clogged at all." ([02:46])

• The hosts mockingly discuss the lack of proper maintenance, reflecting on personal experiences and the broader implications for workplace environment.

Notable Quote:

John: "If you cook something in there, clean it up afterwards and... But she's not wrong." ([02:34])

II. Critique of the "Slump Buster" Sales Initiative

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to dissecting the sales department's latest initiative: the "Slump Buster" sale. John expresses strong disdain for the program, questioning its ethics and effectiveness.

• Understanding "Slump Buster":
  John tries to grasp the concept, leading to the revelation that it involves derogatory tactics aimed at overweight individuals to "bust the slump."

  "Slump busters are bigger than ever. And they'll have the incentives." ([17:31])

• Hosts' Reaction:
  The team engages in humorous yet critical banter, highlighting the inappropriateness of the strategy:

  John: "Slump busters are just to bum out fat people at the end of a bar." ([12:32])

• Underlying Issues:
  They discuss the potential negative impact on company morale and public image, emphasizing the need for respectful and effective motivational strategies.

Notable Quote:

Brady: "It is just some weird Internet thing. It's the first thing that comes up when you type slump." ([17:06])

III. Shooting at Desert Ridge Mall: Love vs. Hate

Transitioning from workplace issues, the hosts explore a recent shooting incident at Desert Ridge Mall. Initially speculating gang involvement, they later uncover it was a personal dispute between an ex-husband and ex-wife, sparking a debate on the primary motivations behind violent crimes.

• Incident Overview:
  John recounts the initial fear of gang violence associated with the location:

  "Desert Ridge has a... that's nice. Beautiful North Scott." ([29:12])

• Psychological Exploration:
  The conversation shifts to whether love or hate is a more significant driver of murder, citing statistics and personal anecdotes:

  John: "I wonder what has caused more murder. Love or hate?" ([30:12])

• Hosts' Insights:
  They debate the complexities of human emotions, discussing how personal relationships often play a more substantial role in such tragedies than generalized hate or aggression.

Notable Quote:

John: "Love has to outweigh hate." ([35:00])

IV. Additional Banter and Insights

Throughout the episode, the hosts maintain a lively and humorous dynamic, often veering into personal stories and light-hearted mockery of internal initiatives.

• Jealousy and Relationships:
  John shares a personal story about dealing with jealousy, tying it back to the earlier discussion on violence:

  John: "If you're gonna do that, you're gonna do it no matter how I feel like if you're gonna do that." ([35:21])

• Mockery of Sales Tactics:
  The team continues to ridicule the "Slump Buster" program, suggesting even more outlandish ideas to highlight its flaws:

  John: "What are we gonna do next? Next is like plumbing is, you know, sometimes summer plumb." ([24:06])

• Community and Morale:
  They reflect on how such negative strategies affect workplace culture and listener perceptions, advocating for more positive and inclusive approaches.

Notable Quote:

John: "Our sales department thinks it's a kick ass way to tell clients, 'Well, you're my slump buster.'" ([13:24])

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Conclusion

In this episode, Holmberg's Morning Sickness effectively combines workplace critique with broader societal issues, all while maintaining an engaging and humorous tone. The hosts provide insightful commentary on the importance of maintaining a respectful work environment and the deeper emotional factors that can lead to extreme behaviors. Through their candid discussions and witty exchanges, they offer listeners both entertainment and thoughtful reflection on complex topics.

Transcript

[Annette]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[John]

You thought that was funny?

[Brady]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you?

[John]

Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Friday. It's 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett. He's already said something horrible. And there's it. Get your checkbook. I'm telling you right now. You be careful. Get your checkbook. And there's Toledo. It's the morning sickness. And just a little house cleaning here at the state. We have some trouble here at the radio station right now. Some big trouble. The. The emails are flying and I just got it. I just looked and saw it. So Brady told me about this. Evidently we have a room of adults now. The same lady, Susan, are, the queen of sales department, was looking around sales yesterday, flying around sales, seeing what was going on. And she went into the kitchen and saw that the microwave had not been cleaned since, I don't know, a decade and a half. Evidently I don't use the microwave here at work and anything else. But evidently it is time for Susan to break out the big guns in the email and call everybody pigs and disgusting human beings. We work with disgusting human beings. And shut the goddamn door. And all this stuff's going on. If you cook something in there, clean it up afterwards and. But she's not wrong. It's the Kaiser or Susie. I said Susie. Yeah, well, Susan was also.

[Annette]

Yeah, you know, she jumped in on that.

[John]

She's prominent on this. Yeah, she was. She was bouncing in on that. Yeah, she got in on that too. That's the one I just read. You're right. Susie downstairs is the one who fires off the initial one. Also, my toilet in my bathroom in my office has not been flushing for the last week or two, maybe longer. And since I'm in a pee only guy, it doesn't matter because it just keeps running. So you pee and it just slowly cleans the. You know, it's, it's. It's always sort of slow flushing. So you go back in there, about 30 minutes later, it's all clean water. Unless someone puts something in there, nothing. Chunky's going down. So I went in there about a week ago and I noticed that someone at nighttime had dropped a couple bombs in there and realized, oh, this toilet doesn't flush. And they left it to.

[Brady]

It just swells.

[John]

Soak, swell. And yeah, Brady, I Didn't know that. I didn't know you knew that.

[Brady]

No, the toilet paper. That's what causes the.

[John]

Not the toilet paper, the poop. It's not.

[Brady]

I don't.

[John]

It's not a clogged.

[Brady]

Sometimes if they overuse the toilet.

[John]

It's not a clogged toilet. It's a. The flusher button doesn't work. It's just not. It's just not clicking. You can't flush the toilet. It's not clogged at all. But it just won't.

[Annette]

You know, you don't have the sensors like they do here.

[John]

Yes.

[Annette]

Oh, okay.

[John]

And that's.

[Annette]

That doesn't work.

[John]

There's no, like, connection to that. So that happened. You got that dirt mess going on, and all I can think of is, this is the same group of people that fought to get the potluck back. This is. Why would we want these people who do this in public to take their. Their private habits are worse than that. If these are. They're eating, like raw chicken right out of the microwave, plopping it down on the spinner, put no care for anybody else's. Anything leaving the cheese. Melted popcorn stuck to the cheese from the last guy's meal. Fish eggs.

[Brady]

You're popping your thing in there. And you. Food stalactites. They don't care.

[Annette]

Looks like the Karsner caverns down there.

[John]

They don't care. And then some. And then we're like, why don't we have a potluck? I'm like. And I've got to fight it again. I heard someone talking about it the other day. I'm like, no, first off, they're not legal anymore. I think. I think it's a federal offense to have potlucks at work because you pigs can't even work the microwave here without destroying it. What makes me think you're cleaning up at home? You're not. You've got cat hair and feces, dirt under your fingernails. Nobody's. You'll dump in toilets and not flush it. And Brady's a. Brad's about to defend the potluck right now. I just watched your face so much. What?

[Brady]

It's amazing how people, you know, you don't. Again, the. The big rule in what she's saying is, do you treat your house like this?

[John]

Yes, they do. I. You are dreaming of it because you want somebody.

[Brady]

Seven layer refrigerator at home.

[John]

No, people are inherently.

[Brady]

I would say. It's not like that.

[John]

People are disgusting. Not all of them, but there's enough of them that if food was brought willy nilly from the house, you can't tell. Don't eat and stop the potluck.

[Brady]

Now think about it. It's. It's basically a cluster of 10 people because they're the only ones that are.

[John]

Doesn't matter, because in that cluster of 10, you've got 3 or 4, 30, 40% of those 10 that are disgusting pigs, which means probably that percentage carries over. Do you want to take a chance that only 60% of the people bringing food to a potluck are. Are decent enough? No, stop the talk of that. If we can't keep the microwave clean over there, then that's it. Also, a little more house cleaning here. It's disgusting that emails have to go out to adults to say, hey, scrape the cheese, popcorn, fish guts, juice from whatever you made out of that thing.

[Brady]

Warming your poo in the microwave.

[John]

Would you do this at home? Of course they would. They're pigs. That's what pigs do. Pigs will treat their home a little worse than work. They don't want to be considered pigs somewhere else. They're just pigs, period. So also, I have to let. I had to let the sales department know yesterday that they're out of touch. Evidently, our sales department is feeling a little bit of a summer slump. And I'm like, oh, that's too bad. Like, we got to get business popping. Let's get these people motivated. So they have little contests now and again. All sales, car sales, radio T. It doesn't matter. Whatever you're selling, there's a little motivating. You got to remember that all salespeople are just well dressed D students with barely high school diplomas. Barely. They're not, you know, that's the reason they went into radio sales in the first place, because decent jobs wouldn't take them. And a friend told them, you should try what I'm doing. It's. It's. It's essentially car sales.

[Annette]

Moynihan, Annette, come on.

[John]

Yeah, exactly. And you. You make my point. It takes absolutely no brain power to be one. And here's proof of it, is that. Now, I don't know if you guys have noticed, but downstairs, I was walking around sales department last year, and I looked around and I said, what's going on here? So go. We got a little sales contest. A motivating sales contest. My go. Yeah. Because it isn't enough to be motivated by your paycheck that somebody's got to light a fire under you every once in a while to remind you to work. But they're calling it the summer slump buster. And I'm like, is anybody aware of what a slump buster is?

[Annette]

That's fat chicks.

[John]

Yeah, you fat women. I'm like, are you all. Did Susan come down and say, all right, everybody. Does the sales staff have to start boning fat people to get better? And they're like, well, that's not what. And like, that's what a slump buster. We're like, what? We don't have enough Mexican businesses? So it's time for the old dirty Sanchez. What's wrong with you guys? Look up what you're talking about. The slump buster. We got signs all over down in the sales department. It says slump busters. I'm like, guys, And Ed looked it up. And he goes, sure enough, that's exactly what it is. That's exactly what that is. And I said, yeah, I'm not an idiot. Slump busters are. It's baseball tradition that if you go into a slump, you a fat woman. That's disgusting. To kind of just clean the cobwebs out of your body and do something you wouldn't normally do. To get back on track with good things, you have to, like, you know, eat the bad pill. And the bad pill is a giant pig. Mark Grace was adamant about the slump buster. Loved the idea of the slump buster. And then we have signs all over downstairs. Sales department. If you don't grab hold of a slump buster, your numbers are going to stay low. Like, no. No slump buster sales. No dirty Sanchez sales. No angry pirate sales. Look up whatever you're titling your silly programs as.

[Brady]

I think it's great because now it's not wrong. Then we can call things maybe the.

[John]

Fall pegging we're sounding this summer. We gotta get louder, everybody. It's time for a sounding sale. You guys know what sounding is? Yeah. It's when you shout out sale, sale, sale. Like, no, you stuff stuff in your urethra. What? Yeah, this. We're. We're pegging Brady's, right? We're have a big pegging sale. We're putting pegs in the board. Nope, it's not what that means. We're going to have a rosebud contest. And who can bloom it first? Like, guys, the slump buster sales event downstairs. And I'm dying not one of them. I said, do you guys know what a sl. Oh, it's just you. You're gross. And I'm like, no, it isn't, buddy. It isn't. It's every human being who's ever had their fingers on The Pulse. Yeah, yeah. Be a fan. Oh, here. Here's a check for whatever you need for. I pay for offenses. Don't worry about that. I'll kick in a few bucks if I've offended.

[Brady]

You able to make some money on this?

[John]

You know what? You might be right. You know what? Maybe I get some retro back on this thing and get a few bucks back in my world. Slump busters and go downstairs. They've got proud signs. They did clip arts.

[Brady]

I walked by there, I didn't notice.

[John]

They're all over the place.

[Annette]

I'm going down there.

[John]

Yeah, yeah. Look and take some photos of our slump busters. Let's get out of this slump. How do we do it, boss? There's only one way I know about getting out of slumps. We gotta start fat shakes. All of us idiots. Yeah. And they were telling me, it's me. I'm like, no, I didn't invent this. Well, it's only you would know. And Ed, it's the first thing that comes up on the Internet. Because that's what it is. It didn't come out. There was no such thing as a slump buster before baseball players started to fat ladies.

[Brady]

I just thought it was like, is it, you know, hall of fame potential night? Because I just saw pictures of the slump buster and had Mark Grace.

[John]

Yeah, Mark Grace and like. Yeah. And one of those twins. A 600 pound girl. That's what I want to do. Brett, go find out what font or clip art they're using. And let's do new posters and we'll put a picture of one of the 600 pound sisters on there too. And just go. Good luck. Go get them, gang. Slump busting idiots. All right, we're going to drive this thing all the way. All the way up north. National sales are down. It's time to ride the Alaskan pipeline. Oh, no, no, no, no. That's a frozen turd. Don't do that. Get those. Rusty trom. We're gonna blow the other ones away like we're playing a horn. It's the old rusty trombo. Let's knock the rust off. Idiots. We were. And that's my proof that sales department people are these students at best who aren't really aware of their surroundings.

[Annette]

Totally miss those signs because I'd be laughing.

[John]

You'd have noticed. You're a baseball guy. And it's not just baseball. It's a man thing. Like dudes, Slump busters entered the vernacular only through banging fat chicks. And the fact that that's what they called it. And I walked by Ed's desk and I saw the. It's just a piece of paper they printed. It looks like 1999 clip art. And it's got the slump buster thing. And I looked and I'm like, ed's funny. Ed's joking about slump. And then the next desk had it. And then I looked on the wall and I'm like, wait, they're all over what happened down here? So I asked, what are we doing? We're having a slump buster sale. You guys are gonna bone fat women. What's wrong with you? It's not me. You're the one who put up all the signs.

[Annette]

Wait a minute. I. Ed Har. Moynihan. There's dudes down there.

[John]

No, they should know.

[Brady]

They should.

[John]

You just said Ed Moynihan and Har. You just named the three.

[Annette]

Ben walks down there.

[John]

Ben walks down there. I mean, Ben probably knows.

[Brady]

Definitely relishing, like, this is awesome.

[Annette]

I mean, there's dudes down there. They should. They should have said something.

[John]

Slump busters were also something when I worked at Tony Roma's that if you had gotten into a sex drought. Bang a fat chick. Dude, get it out of your system. Get her. She'll. She breaks the slump. They're easy. Basically, they're easy marks. The slump buster is. She's the fat one. She's. No. She doesn't have a lot of options, right?

[Annette]

Yeah, just take whatever.

[John]

So you're gonna get laid. So go get her. And then you're. And then you can. Then you got back on. You had some. So you're back in there. You know, you took some bp. She's basically soft toss. It's an easy kill. Gets confidence back. Let's get back in the game.

[Brady]

It's like curing the hiccups.

[John]

Yeah. You went four or five months without having sex. You're telling your friends, dude, I'm in a dry spell. It's like, grab a slump buster. Morning sickness. Holmberg's morning sickness. And then the pig at the end of the bar. Like, I gotta do this. Then your four month streak is over, and you start going, all right, all right, I'm back. It hasn't been that long. I got this out of my system. The tension's going. I can be normal again. And our sales department thinks it's a kick ass way to tell clients, well, you're my slump buster. What? What'd you call me?

[Annette]

It's 10 minutes to 2 at the bar down there.

[John]

It's all right.

[Annette]

Whatever's.

[Brady]

Left.

[Annette]

I'll take it.

[John]

And Phoenix is overweight. Yes. And they're coming to get you. Yeah, they're all gonna.

[Brady]

That's good. Pressure to add more incentives. It's 10 minutes to 2.

[John]

You try to get the clock down there. Oh, man. I was.

[Annette]

You know, we need a poster.

[Brady]

One sheeter to the clients. Yeah, it's part of the summer slump.

[John]

We came to you because we think you're an easy kill. Like a fat girl at the end of the bar. You're my slump buster. Huh? What? That's right, Eric. You're going to be our next client. What am I doing here? What's happening? Crazy.

[Brady]

It could work.

[John]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And then again, you know, we could go to the fall freak off.

[John]

Why not? Oh, there you go. Totally, completely unaware of any. Anything that's going on on the planet.

[Annette]

I want to see one of the sales people going there with their little flyer like Byron at no money pond going, hey, we're having that slump buster sale.

[John]

Here you go.

[Annette]

What do you think?

[John]

We're in a little bit of a summer swoon, so we decided to slump bust. Well, I've done that. I've had to do that in the past. That's tough. I'm sorry. You're going through it. What are you talking about? Oh, you gotta. You gotta bang a fat person now. Like a gross one. Like a homeless almost. Anyway, good luck down there, sales department. I wish I was in on that meeting when we broke out the flyers. Here's what we're gonna do this summer. Do. Dying. Dying, laughing. Anyway, so if the toilet don't flush, you have to go get a little net and scoop out your stuff. Especially if you're in somebody's bathroom you're not supposed to be in. Cleaning guy. So I think he's been using one. It's the only one with a key.

[Annette]

At night because Shannon's here, but he's.

[John]

Now, if he leaves it open, I'm looking at the night guy over there at Katie kb. Because everyone at that station hates me. And everyone, pretty much everyone outside of KUPD in this building is not. They would poop in my office if they had the door open and no one was here. I put it on them first. Then. Then the cleaning guy who's just probably in there going, well, I don't want to do it because there is that guy here still, and they're here late at night and he's got nobody to think of. So that's probably. It's a nice bathroom. It's solo he goes in there and then he realized midway through his dump, and if it is the cleaning guy, and this is the only reason I think it might not be the cleaning guy, is because they have cleaning stuff and gloves. A decent human being scoops that out.

[Brady]

Of there and there's, you know, you're going to get a call and you know, yeah, right from the service.

[John]

I don't know who did that, but I keep my eyes on it.

[Brady]

There are definitely some people that would do that thinking. You know, one couple might think it's hilarious.

[John]

Sure. But they wouldn't leave it. They did that. This was not a joke. Yeah, because the toilet does. I've known business. I've known for a long time that it doesn't flush. That's because I'm just a pee only guy. I don't poop at work. You shouldn't poop at work, but I'm a pee only guy. So as it runs, will you print like 20 of those and we'll go put them downstairs? Brett has just found a giant fat lady in a hat in her underwear. And it just says slump buster on it. And it took you all of a.

[Brady]

Half second and it's for the Astros.

[John]

Did you see them, Rich? They're down there. You haven't seen them. Go bring one picture. Go bring one up. There's. There's still. Print more. Trust me. They don't know what's going on down there. I'm going to go ahead and say it. If somebody from Hubbard Sales comes to you today and says that, it just go, am I your slump buster? It's like, what do you think? I'm a fat, easy kill at the end of a bar. Who told you? I'm keeping you. I'm keeping you. It is just. They are. It is funny when management reveals how they lick windows at the. With their free time.

[Brady]

If it turns around, it's one of the biggest contests we've ever had.

[John]

We're gonna have. Yeah.

[Brady]

Gotta do more of them.

[John]

Gonna get bigger. The slump busters are bigger than ever. And they'll have the incentives. Last year's slump busters were great. This year they're even bigger. Oh, we're going for bigger slump busters, you dummies. But yeah, when Ed looked it up, they still were in complete denial. It's. That's just some weird Internet thing. It's the first thing that comes up when you type slump. It just finished for him.

[Annette]

That's 40 years old.

[John]

I remember that in junior high when we were at Tony Roman I was introduced. There it is. The summer Discovery Slump busters Summer Discovery Drive. And it's a dude. The pit of a dude with a guy eating ice cream.

[Annette]

That's the Katie KB sales sheet.

[John]

That's.

[Annette]

That's not.

[Brady]

No wonder. I. I looked at that thing and I'm like, oh, they're everywhere.

[John]

Oh, it's a bat. It's a summer. Not for us. We're doing slump busters. But it's optional. Yeah, it says the summer slump is real, but it's optional. There's ways around it. A fatty.

[Brady]

Wait for the grenade incentive.

[John]

Oh, it's great.

[Brady]

Grenade package.

[John]

Yeah, we might as well just have the this bitch will do sale. I laughed for 20 minutes yesterday at the absolute lack of. And again, they think it's. They think that I'm just the devil. So I wander around here writing checks, kicking names, you know, Here you go. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Kick a check. Kick a check. And then. And they think I'm an idiot. And so I walk through and when I say something, they're like, oh, you're an idiot. That's what I'm like. I'm telling you right now, if you told people that you're in a slump buster sale, they're gonna laugh because this is.

[Brady]

Could you come with dog days?

[John]

Yeah. This one's. This guy says, quit hating on the big girls. It's real. When I need my pipes drained, big girls always there. Always handled me like I was Ace Ventura after liver. And the dog. That's right. Remember that scene when she brought the dog back? You're at his for to get 829 off. Oh, and they're all working for a slump buster to get a day off because the harder they work, the less they have to work. That's a. That's genius bonus. How about just show up to work every day, weekend.

[Annette]

There's the urban dictionary.

[John]

Do your job. Oh, this one says you need to post those on Facebook for everybody. You're killing me right now. Okay. Yeah, that's the urban dictionary. It says a slump buster. A large unattractive girl, most commonly with low self esteem. Sex with one that is suffering in a slump. That's right.

[Annette]

You give the example.

[John]

Go ahead.

[Brady]

Mitch.

[Annette]

Mitch. Dude, when was the last time you got laid? Yeah, it's been a while. But don't worry, I got me a slump buster last night. I should be good.

[John]

All right. Nice job, brother. Yeah, it's hilarious. And they're completely clueless about it, but they're posters all over downstairs. If I put up slump buster posters saying, KUPD's, the station's doing great. The slump is that they can't sell the other two dumps around here.

[Brady]

Looking at the poster and the design, everything, it looks like, you know, kind of Tommy Bahama.

[John]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. You see the guy eating ice cream in his Hawaiian shirt? Yeah. He's looking for slump buster and he's got bait. He's carrying around ice cream. They're stupid. They're so stupid. Any who laughed for 20 minutes took my beating downstairs that I was the weirdo. And then when they looked it up on the Internet, everybody's face was like, oh, my God, what are we up to? I don't think they tell the clients about slump busters. I don't think it's a good idea.

[Brady]

It's an in house.

[John]

It's an in house thing. But you get a day off because the best thing to do when you're in trouble is fight. If that's your motivation to work harder so you can work less, I think I can understand why you're ebbing and flowing in slumps. If the. If the. If your entire motivation is to work less and only spike every once in a while, then you're only working for, you know, you're not working for your job. You're working for peanuts that are tossed on top little jimmies. How about I'll fire you if you don't pick it up. How about signs that say that pick up every. Are you about to get fired if you don't hit this number? This is the bare minimum of sales, and you're on your ass. There's one that'll. That should motivate some folks.

[Annette]

It's better than a fat chick.

[John]

Better than banging fat chicks for work. You know, work. This place is starting to force you to do stuff you didn't want to do. I didn't realize that. That, you know, I don't know if it's mandatory that the salespeople have to go fat people in order to make their. Their jobs easier. Crazy. Flat out crazy.

[Brady]

The funny thing is if you, you know, if it doesn't happen, it will be a slump buster.

[John]

Yeah.

[Brady]

When's the last time you had a day off?

[John]

Yeah. You guys are gonna be working weekends. I did. I better go bang a fat chick like today. Susan was right. Ed comes back and he goes, sales through the roof have been knocking fat girls all over the city. Dexter just emailed in and said, I'm a women's softball player and we have slump busters. Oh, you do?

[Brady]

Why not?

[John]

Apparently, because they're already slump busters. What does slump busters do? I didn't realize female softball players are slump busters. Who do they slump bust? That's got to be somebody in a wheelchair. Anyway, I laughed. I wanted to share. The place has a lot of emails going around throwing blame. You are unaware of your surroundings. Clean that microwave. What's wrong with you? It's like, by the way, we're having our slump buster sale because I got my fingers on the pulse. And it's just fun because I know everybody out there driving to work, looks at their management and goes, these mother don't know anything. And ours proves it every once in a while by posting up big homemade posters of a duty dude carrying ice cream on the beach. Like a predator trying to groom a fats, their sales go up. Oh, I'm not allowed in any meetings because I would. I would have been banned from that one for sure. The first thing you'd have heard from me is, are you kidding me?

[Brady]

What?

[John]

What's wrong with slump bus? Well, first off, the creepy dude carrying fattening foods around trying to get a slump buster is, look it up. Just look it up. How can you be so unaware? You're right. Dave Har's a baseball fan. He's.

[Annette]

Yeah, he should know this.

[John]

He should have said, oh, believe me. He didn't say anything because he's afraid.

[Brady]

Hilarious. You're like, you want to do this? Slump busters? I'm all in.

[John]

Yeah, maybe he's into it. I go, God, that'll help. I've had a couple clients drop off, and it's. I sure could use a chunk. You see, our sales department's going out there with bluebell ice cream. Hey, you interested in buying some pig? Take a look at my ice cream cone. I love ice cream. I bet you do. Of course you do. You ever think about advertising?

[Brady]

Advertising what?

[John]

I don't know. Ozempic or something. I need you.

[Brady]

Imagine if bluebell, whatever ice cream company came out with the flavor. The slump buster.

[John]

The slump buster.

[Annette]

That's brilliant.

[John]

Yeah. Grooming a slump buster. Yeah, you just have it.

[Brady]

But how long would that last?

[John]

Extra fattening ice cream. It's just Crisco with Jimmy's on dying laughing. So thank you, sales department, for. For now taking our. Our mantle as the funniest people in the room. They don't realize they are, but they are the funniest people in the building. The slump master sale. Good luck with that. And you Know what's going to be great? Because it just started in a couple of days, there's going to be a chart with all the salespeople's names and, like, check marks next to. On who's winning, who's got the most slump buster hits. And it'll say slump busters. And it'll say, like, Dave Har. And they'll be like, nine check MVP to be the one who got the most out of it. He's just killing the slump. He's just crushing fats.

[Brady]

Maybe they'll have stuff like launch rate.

[John]

Oh, yeah. They'll do, like, analytics on your slumps. I hope they do it. I hope they. I hope the. The winner not only does it by, like, sales amounts, but by the pound. Like, let's. Like, how big was the. Like, how fat were your sales moneyballs? Yeah, hilarious. Yeah, hilarious. We're gonna have. Yeah. What are we gonna do next? Next is like, plumbing is, you know, sometimes summer plumb. We're gonna do a drain the snake sale. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Brady]

To the pipe.

[John]

We've got this big Viking horn. We put it in the sale. So every time you make a sale, it's the tug the. Hmm. Let's do right now. I'm telling you. Want to get up, wander over to that room and just tug that horn as often as you can. Now, if we had an IQ test downstairs, it wouldn't break the four figures combined. They could help each other out, they could work as a team, and they'd come up about a 112 after seeing the slump busters. Unbelievable. Almost one sickness. Magnetic update. Holmberg's morning sickness. Can I get again? Let. Come into my office. Bring the checkbook. I'm like, all right. Yeah, I know what happened. Why did you do that? I didn't do anything. I'm an observer. Why do we have dirty pictures all over the building? Get out. That's all Tripp does now. Just spins.

[Brady]

I'm seeing an old school. He's like, Mr. Mooney. Now you're Lucy.

[John]

Yeah, he's just becoming a cartoon gong for me at this point. Get in here. You're the one who hired the lady who put up pictures of a grooming dude eating ice cream looking for fat chicks on a beach. That's not what that is. I don't know. It says slump buster. I pretty sure that's exactly what that is. You're the only one in the world who knows that.

[Brady]

I don't think I am keeping this.

[John]

I can show you my emails that. The second I said it, they just went, you are idiots. I know. I agree. Good luck. Hope it works. That would be great. Sales went through the moon because we slump. Busted. Well, that's what slump busters do. You get your confidence. It worked. You get your confidence, you bang a fat and you get your confidence back and you feel good again. You get you. You drain the pipes. You, like, take a breath and you get back out there and you try for real people.

[Brady]

It works.

[John]

It works. Look, I'll tell you this. Don't waste your time. Advert on other stations, even our own other stations. It's a waste of your money. They try to throw it all in. Like they make it a throw in. Because it's impossible to sell. KUPD is the only place you need to worry about. We get results. Ask any of the clients. Ask Doug Hopkins. There's a reason he only advertises on tv and here he's not on any radio station. Occasionally he's on ktr. They get some results too.

[Annette]

Otherwise, Ladonna makes sure that they get results.

[John]

Oh, yeah. No. Ladonna shows up at your house. I understand. We ran a Doug Hopkins ad. You heard today. And you haven't tried to sell your house. What's the problem here? We don't want to move. Ladonna. You didn't want to move. Now you do. Hopkins said, now your house is as is, with bullet holes in it. Are we happy? Yeah. Ladonna makes a star review. Yeah. Ladonna. Ladonna, door to door, is their sales pitch over at ktr. It's like we're gonna have to send Ladonna out. We're in a bit of a slump. You got it, boss. I'm out of here. So long, Admiral. I'll be back with money. Hi, ladonna. Harvey, ktar. Your roof looks fine, but we run roofing ads. Get it done. Call now.

[Annette]

You're selling your house. Sharp.

[John]

When the commercial says call now, Ladonna.

[Brady]

Means that I'm only gonna say it once.

[John]

Goodness, there's a comma. Call now. If I have to come back here, I'll do the roof myself. And you will pay me.

[Annette]

Yes, ma' am.

[John]

Yes, sir. Anyway, pretty good stuff. By the way, I did the. The bullet noises. That's not a real threat. It's a toy I play with. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. It's not real. There was a shooting at Desert Ridge Mall, right? And I thought to myself, desert Ridge has a. That's. And Then they said what it was and you start thinking that there are, you know, gun toting weirdos hanging around Desert Ridge. And I'm sure there's a few. Hasn't been a whole lot of crime up in that area. Although Desert Ridge is known for human trafficking. It's a hot spot, right? Huh?

[Annette]

It's not an avenue.

[John]

No. Desert Ridge. No, it isn't.

[Annette]

Oh, I was thinking the other one though.

[John]

You're thinking of Arrowhead. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It wouldn't even made the news. Shooting at Arrowheads. Of course there was. It's named after a weapon. Arrow. It's like you're gonna get shot by something. My bad.

[Annette]

Sorry about that.

[John]

No, desert ridges. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that's nice. Beautiful North Scott.

[Brady]

It's almost too far north for an.

[John]

Ave. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's. It's great. So. But then. And then. Then you found out it was an ex husband shooting and killing. It's terrible. His ex wife in the parking lot. And the speculation I read said something about like she had a date or something. And it got me wondering how. Because I. Because my first initial reaction was, ooh, gang violence. Because I'm white and I'm scared by the news.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's the go to.

[John]

Yeah, your go to. It's a mall parking lot. It's a teenager gang violence.

[Annette]

Trey and Ricky are hanging out there.

[John]

Exactly.

[Annette]

Volkswagen.

[John]

Yeah, look what happened at the end of the Boys in the Hood. Where did the last shooting occur? In a mall. Parking. Yeah, because one of them was get a burger. Hungry as a mother. And they went to the. Was it ghetto burger?

[Annette]

Is that what they call get a burger? We used to call ghetto burger, but.

[John]

Yeah, get a burger. Yeah, because save got like Sam. So with my hair. That dude needed. He wanted a burger. Let's get over there. I'm hungry as a mother went over. They got shot. And that's what we've been taught by the tv, is that mall parking lot shootings are usually bad neighborhoods or something.

[Brady]

YouTube stars.

[John]

Yeah, sometimes that happens. You get it. But for the most part, it's bad. Bad guys that you're like, well, they. They live that life. You hear desert Ridge and you're like, oh, no. Bad guys have moved over to Desert Ridge. Is there any place safe? And then you find out that it's two people that once promised their lives to each other. And it got me thinking because I watch a lot of murder shows. I wonder what has caused more murder. Love or anger? Hate.

[Brady]

Because there is, I think that of road rage. Stuff seems to be.

[John]

Well, there's no, there's not like a lot of that. There's a lot of yellings. There's some shooting. You'll hear about knowing it, but there's shootings all the time. Love or hate.

[Brady]

And we're coming into the high season.

[John]

What causes the heat? What causes more shootings? And I have to think it's love.

[Brady]

Love turns even a person that has been shunned from everyone, like, because of no women.

[John]

Well, no, I mean, look, one, it's. Again, it's not all of one and all the. They're. They're both throwing good numbers.

[Brady]

But that would put that in that circle of.

[John]

Well, I think if somebody just went and shot up strangers, that's. That could. You know what, you could make an.

[Brady]

Argument a girl that caused that.

[John]

I mean, love drove them that way. And it isn't about hate of the people they're shooting. It's about that love damaged them so badly. I think love is the leader in the clubhouse on murder. I don't know that it's a. It's a runaway. And that's why the. That's why my brain debated it. But I start thinking that how many times you hear husband shoots wife, wife shoots husband, or. Or, you know, family member. The one the other day where the. The stepson shot the mom and the. Or the stepmom and the dad, and they're like, he was on the run for a little bit.

[Brady]

It comes back to. I think it's love, but I think it comes back to parenting. I mean, that seems to be the go to. You gotta let them know. No, just if you're not trying to.

[John]

Solve it, I don't care.

[Brady]

I don't care.

[John]

Why?

[Brady]

Because you're saying just drive by the ex girlfriend's house.

[John]

But here's the thing. I did drive by the ex girlfriend's house. And luckily for me, I didn't see her, you know, making out with some new dude outside. I did drive by once and saw a truck in front of the house. And I knew whose truck it was, and I almost lost it. But I had to contain myself. It had nothing to do with my upbringing. It had everything to do with me losing my mind.

[Brady]

Because love and losing your mind would gun never even.

[John]

I would have hit him with a car if he was outside. I was not in a good space. Yeah, I probably would have done something. I would have hit his. I don't know how many times have my uncle had his ex wife get mad at him for not being jealous Enough. She went to a concert and he didn't want to go. And he goes, go, have fun. It'll be great. And my uncle's kind of like me. The whole jealousy thing is like a waste of time. You're jealous isn't going to stop somebody from doing something, and it isn't going to, you know, keeps like. It's not going to make them do it. It's just a wasted. It's not an emotion. It's a weird little thing. Envy is different than jealous. Jealousy is ugly. She went to a concert with somebody from her work, and he had a little Carmen Ghia he had worked on and made really awesome. And those are kind of junk cars. I used to like the way they look, but they have, like, the worst engines ever, you know, better than anybody. And he had, you know, the quadruple, and he spruced it up. He really liked it, did the body work. Everything was great. And he was working on the car. She went to a concert, comes back home and says, I went to a concert with Rob, blah, blah, blah, from work and another guy. And he goes, did you have fun? You don't even care. And he's like, did you? Like, what am I supposed to worry about here? Did you. Were you banging these guys?

[Brady]

I trust you.

[John]

Yeah, I don't. If you're gonna do that, you're gonna do it no matter how I feel like if you're gonna do that. It doesn't matter if I'm jealous or put pressure on you. In fact, that'll just push you to do it more. So she's like, I don't know what's wrong with you. You're not even angry. So she goes outside, and he's like, she left. I thought she just drove away. She took her car, went back about 30ft on the road, and drove as fast as she could into his karmagia, into his precious. Yeah, you love this. Now are you jealous? And he goes, no, I'm scared. You're crazy. Like, you're an insane person.

[Annette]

Now I'm pissed.

[John]

And that was love. Love caused that. So how many times you've seen stories where, you know, hate definitely has its place. It's powerful, it has its. But I'm wondering, does love win the hooks? Whose cues caused more death, love or hate? And then you look at the FBI stats and stuff, and you're more likely to be killed by someone you know and you are close to than you are a stranger. It's weird.

[Annette]

I think to solve it, you need to ride around with your Shirt off with your buddy, listening to Poison and stuff like that. And just, you know, just be ready to go.

[John]

You're making fun of Mark Stebbings in one of his worst moments. And I don't like to use names, but bank CEO Mark Stebbings was driving around in his 86 Prelude with this on, crying his eyes out because he is love. Take it away. School and Guadalupe. And I had my shirt off, too, because I'm like, that's what we're doing. We're a couple dudes with our shirts off driving around looking for. Wait a minute. Are you crying? This is a song. Like, turn it down then. No, I want to hear it. And then just at the top of his lungs, I love you, Tiffany. The intersection didn't need to know that every rose has its. Did not need to know this.

[Brady]

And what you. You know, basically, it'll take time, but get over it. You didn't go, let's go get a gun and shoot some people.

[John]

No, I said take me home. I think you're about to kill her. I got to get away from you. You've lost your mind. And look, I did it. I have a whole book of vagina poetry I wrote when I was in my worst moment. I drove by that girl's house every day, multiple times a day.

[Brady]

And that's what I'm thinking. People are losing the alternatives.

[John]

What do you mean? To drive by the poetry.

[Annette]

Drive by is really easy now.

[John]

Good point. Brad. Be careful. It's like the slump bus. We gotta be careful. We're having a big drive by stair.

[Annette]

Oh, no. Oh.

[John]

Anyway. Yeah, but. Yeah, that was a. I just sat in that prelude kind of quiet for a little bit. Like.

[Annette]

Oh, I just wish Dan Hilberg would have pulled up next to you guys in his room. Work trucker.

[John]

What the. I had a long day at work. What do you two do? Put your clothes on.

[Brady]

Why are you crying?

[John]

Put your. God. Why is your friend sobbing? You will give him a hand job. Give him a hand job. Make the tears stop. Make something else on his body leak. I can't look at this.

[Brady]

Comes home to Marcia. The both of them, shirts off.

[John]

I saw Holmerg, our boy. That's right. And the cool one, Stubbings. You know, the one that grew up and turned into a man. He was. I think our boy broke up with him because Stebbings was all torn up and they were listening to love songs. Anyway. I'm gonna kill the boy. I wonder how much of it. I wonder what the. What the statistic is. Love has to outweigh hate.

[Brady]

Always said it most of the time, like, man, look for a breakup, breakup. A lot of those random dude went.

[John]

All the way to Desert Ridge, just shot his ex wife because the love had driven him to crazy. And you can say, oh, he hates her now. But at one point in this guy's life, he stood up in front of family and friends and said, forever. You can't love anything more. And that can change, no doubt. But still, to kill her. And he did. At Desert Ridge, he should have just.

[Annette]

Went for a slump buster.

[John]

Yeah, I mean, well, you know, I'll have him contact Susan.

[Annette]

Are we hiring down there?

[John]

They were told when they answered the phones, it's like, thanks for calling Hubbard Broadcasting, home of the slump buster. We should have it on our sign like home of the Whopper. It is home of the Whopper. It's the same thing. We're looking for Whoppers. I love it here. It's such a weird place. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? 585-9800. A good one. We'll scream it together. It's 98 KUP. Wake up, Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.

[Michael]

This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. This fourth of July, as we celebrate freedom and the birth of our nation, ask yourself, are you truly free if past convictions are still holding you or a loved one back? It's time to reclaim independence. At Restore My Civil Rights, our attorney helps Americans like you reclaim what was lost. I did it. And so can you. To fight for your rights, visit restoremycivilrights.com or call 855 GUN RIGHTS and book a free consultation today.