06-30-25 - While Trying To Name Stars John Saw Story On Puppy Who Ate Panties That Weren't Its Owners Causing Drama - BO

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: While Trying To Name Stars John Saw Story On Puppy Who Ate Panties That Weren't Its Owners Causing Drama - BO
Release Date: June 30, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Station: 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio

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Episode Overview

In this engaging episode of Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, Holmberg's Morning Sickness, host John Holmberg and his vibrant co-hosts dive into a humorous and slightly outrageous news story about a puppy that ate underwear not belonging to its owner. The discussion is laced with witty banter, playful teasing, and insightful commentary, making for an entertaining listen that keeps listeners hooked from start to finish.

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Stargazing and Naming Stars

The episode kicks off with Holmberg sharing his recent stargazing experience in Sedona. He describes using the SkyView Light app to identify stars but finds it ineffective in the bright lights of Phoenix. Instead, he opts to observe the stars with the naked eye, leading to a moment of introspection and awe.

Holmberg (01:21): "I was just sitting there staring. It looked like a crazy person with their phone moving it around and touching. It's got every star's name, like all that stuff. And then when the moon kind of went away about 1:30 in the morning, I was just sitting there staring. It is unreal how cool it is."

This segment sets a reflective tone before transitioning into the main topic of the episode.

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Puppy Eats Underwear: A Bizarre Tale

The heart of the episode revolves around a peculiar news story Holmberg stumbled upon: a British case where a woman took her puppy to the vet due to stomach issues, only to discover that the dog had ingested a pair of underwear—specifically, a thong—that wasn't hers.

Holmberg (02:35): "I saw this story where it was a British thing. A girl took her dog to the vet. They found something in his tummy, and it was a thong."

The story unfolds with Holmberg humorously questioning the vet's findings and the implausibility of naming stars after such an incident.

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Co-Hosts' Reactions and Playful Teasing

Bret Vesely and Rocky Moselle join Holmberg in dissecting the absurdity of the situation, contributing their own humorous takes and sarcastic remarks.

Bret (04:24): "She's like, I don't wear thong panties."

Rocky (07:14): "That's right."

Their interactions highlight the camaraderie among the hosts, as they riff on the awkwardness of the story and the embarrassment of the involved parties.

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Humorous Insights and Takeaways

The co-hosts delve deeper into the implications of the story, offering tongue-in-cheek advice to both pet owners and veterinarians.

Holmberg (08:52): "To message to all vets, if you find underwear in the stomach, be a little scarce with the details."

They playfully critique the situation, suggesting that such awkward discoveries require a delicate handling to avoid further embarrassment.

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Notable Quotes

• Holmberg (02:35): "They named all of them little ones big. It didn't matter about grifting."

• Bret (11:57): "We're looking for the little ones this time."

• Rocky (07:43): "It was a 26-year-old female vet."

• Holmberg (08:52): "To message to all vets, if you find underwear in the stomach, be a little scarce with the details."

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Conclusion

As the episode winds down, Holmberg and his co-hosts reflect on the humorous side of pet ownership mishaps. They emphasize the importance of being mindful about leaving personal items within a pet's reach, all while maintaining a lighthearted and entertaining atmosphere.

Holmberg (12:37): "Very digestible. But that's a good puppy. You know, helping out a bro worked for a while."

The episode wraps up with laughter and final thoughts, leaving listeners amused and perhaps a bit more cautious about their pet's culinary adventures.

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Final Thoughts

Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully blends humor with relatable pet stories, creating a captivating narrative that resonates with a wide audience. The hosts' chemistry and quick wit ensure that even the most bizarre stories are presented with charm and laughter, making this episode a standout for morning listeners seeking both entertainment and a good chuckle.

Transcript

[Patrick Riley]

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[Valley Chevy Dealer]

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[Holmberg]

Do not listen to this while driving or when full alertness is needed.

[Brett]

The rest of Holmberg's morning sickness. This is the Big Red radio.

[Holmberg]

I watched a news story while I was sitting on the patio too, enjoying all of Sedona's night offerings. By the way, the thing you gotta do when you're up in the woods. I sat there just mesmerized again. I was like, it was like I was like a constant shroom guy. That skyview light app doesn't work in Phoenix very well. You get up there with the actual stars. This thing is a map on your phone and it's, you know, interactive. It's like you move, it moves. It shows where everything is. And then when the moon kind of went away about 1:30 in the morning, I was just sitting there staring. It looked like a crazy person with their phone moving it around and touching. It's got every star's name, like all that stuff. And it is unreal how cool it is. You start real and then you can start to see the continent. Oh, I was, it was like I was really stoned.

[Rocky Moselle]

Which one has Rocky Mozel's name on it?

[Holmberg]

They all have Rocky Moselle's stamp on the bottom little tms I looked for my star. Didn't. Amazing that that scam didn't quite pan out where you can name stars after people. I never found the Holmberg. Evidently it's way out there. Then you realize that somebody started that. Somebody looked up there and said, wanna name em all of them?

[Brett]

We got nothing else to do.

[Holmberg]

There's no TV yet. All right? And they did. And then they tracked it and somehow or another it's like legit. Cause I'd be like, this is made up. I'll go back and that'll be a different name in a second. Nope, registered. It's like the next night I go, no one would notice if that was different.

[Brett]

That.

[Holmberg]

Oh, no, that's the same thing. They named all of them little ones big. It didn't matter about grifting. Oh, but anyway, so I was out there doing that. I saw this story where it was a. Again, it was a British thing. I don't know why I follow British news. Much girl took her to dog story. And I'm a dog person. I love the animals. So she took her dog to the vet. Stomach issues, wasn't pooping right. Puppy and she's like, something's terrible. They take an X ray, they find something in his tummy, and they. And they take him in to the surgery and stuff like that. She goes home worried about her. Puppy comes out, we got it. It's all right. It was an obstruction. He ate something. Like, okay, cool. She goes to the vet to say, okay, well what was it? And they laugh and they hold up a pair of her underwear. And you know, of course, puppies love underwear, women's underwear and things like that. And you're like, oh, she ate something. But it was a thong. She doesn't wear thongs. Oh, busted.

[Brett]

You're stone cold.

[Holmberg]

No, not busted. Puppy's the greatest wingman of all time.

[Brett]

She's home.

[Holmberg]

Eat this. Come on, Rover, do it. Ate her underwear. Got him sick. Oh, I ate my master's underwear to protect him from his terrible behavior. Oh, girlfriend takes him in, pulls the thong out. Of course the vet has to say it's a thong. Can't just say it was a pair of underwear. Would have been a better wing on that. But no, I gave great detail of it being a thong.

[Listener]

She's like, I don't wear thong panties.

[Holmberg]

So they were thong panties. All right. Pink little picture of Garfield on the front. Said Monday they were. They were definitely thong.

[Listener]

Whose are these?

[Holmberg]

And then she had to go home. Dog with a cone on its head. Oh, moaning, doesn't want to walk anymore.

[Listener]

So do you want to explain yourself?

[Holmberg]

What happened?

[Listener]

Well, he ate some underwear.

[Holmberg]

Oh, God. He's gonna be okay.

[Listener]

Yeah, but you're not.

[Holmberg]

Oh, no.

[Patrick Riley]

Was this playing in the background?

[Brett]

Hey.

[Rocky Moselle]

Hey.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, it was an Orange Juice Jones.

[Brett]

Got some hot chocolate in the stove waiting for you.

[Holmberg]

Is it the only side piece song.

[Brett]

That we all go to?

[Rocky Moselle]

And all his stuff was out.

[Holmberg]

That's right.

[Brett]

He was cold busted. Don't cold bust.

[Holmberg]

It's not good. They're never in the snow. In the Orange Juice Jones thing. The dog needed surgery. Put a punter panties out of that tummy. What you been up to? I don't wear no thong on the pants. Who's a thong on the pants of these? I'm fine.

[Patrick Riley]

Did she say that in those times?

[Holmberg]

Yeah, she did. In a British accent.

[Patrick Riley]

Break out the jammy and.

[Brett]

Break out the jammy and flat glass both a few.

[Holmberg]

You gonna blast both of us.

[Brett]

But yeah.

[Holmberg]

That is a rough way. But the dog, I mean, what a buddy.

[Patrick Riley]

Take him up for the team.

[Holmberg]

Ate her underwear that he just left laying on the ground. And what a pig. You're over there being a whore. You went home not knowing. I don't know where my underwear went. How did that get left behind in the first place? That's. That's some serious ugly whoring.

[Listener]

Sure, I'll come to your house. Hey, where's my panties?

[Brett]

I don't know. You gotta go. That's enough. You're out.

[Listener]

But I don't have my panties.

[Brett]

Get out.

[Holmberg]

We'll find them some other time.

[Listener]

Why? Why are you being so rude?

[Brett]

Get out. The dog probably at your panties. Don't worry about it.

[Holmberg]

Go on.

[Brett]

That's right.

[Valley Chevy Dealer]

You're still young.

[Brett]

I hope you learned a valuable lesson.

[Holmberg]

From all Orange Juice Jones. Cornflake without the milk. That would never happen to a guy. A girl's dog would never eat our underwear. That's because something's wrong with our underwear. And something sweet and delicious about a woman's underwear.

[Rocky Moselle]

I thought about the other lady, you know, that's like. I don't wear. I don't wear thongs. I wear bloomers.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, what does she wear?

[Brett]

Giant.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, well, you know, they're. They're boy shorts and. But maybe she's a bloomer gal. And that's probably why he had a side piece.

[Rocky Moselle]

That's right.

[Holmberg]

What I thought was bloomers. Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and find a thong girl. I wear skivvies. And did she tell the vet. That's the bigger thing.

[Brett]

That's like, yeah, we found a pair of thong underpants. Luckily we got them out.

[Holmberg]

Dog's gonna be just fine. Keen.

[Brett]

Ready to go home now.

[Listener]

What'd you find in there again?

[Brett]

Some thong panties.

[Listener]

I don't wear thongs.

[Brett]

Not my problem, ma' am. Pay the bill up front, you go home and take care of all this mess. I didn't do that part.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, it's not about like. She had to tell everyone.

[Brett]

And then.

[Holmberg]

That's a. That's a pretty rough way to find out. Anything but nice kill.

[Patrick Riley]

They were only size twos. Obviously they're not yours.

[Brett]

Well.

[Holmberg]

And the vet should have known better. A real good dude. Vet pulls these out goes, this isn't.

[Brett]

The lady who dropped this dog off.

[Holmberg]

These wouldn't stretch around her calf.

[Rocky Moselle]

It was a 26 year old female vet.

[Holmberg]

Oh. Oh.

[Brett]

That's why.

[Patrick Riley]

Probably plays for the Mercury part time.

[Brett]

The sisterhood.

[Holmberg]

Wow. Really? All right. I like that punch. No reason for that one, but I like it a lot.

[Listener]

So I found some thong underwear that.

[Holmberg]

Aren'T your size and the owner's like.

[Rocky Moselle]

Well, I didn't understand because I don't wear a thong.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, that's what I just said. Brady. Yeah.

[Brett]

You all right?

[Holmberg]

That was the whole crux of the story. But does she say that to the vet?

[Rocky Moselle]

That's what I was.

[Holmberg]

That's what I'm saying. Does she. Did she. She said that to the news? Yeah. We found out. Yeah, I don't wear underpants. I didn't see a picture. I was just listening to something. But it's a. It's a very strange situation to think that that would be the way you go. And the vet didn't help out. So to message to all vets, if you find underwear in the stomach, be a little scarce with the details. How about that? Take a. Take a look around. Read the room. Don't get yourself involved in that pickle. We found a cloth. It was a cloth.

[Valley Chevy Dealer]

This fourth of July, celebrate family fun and the freedom to save with your Valley Chevy dealers. It all starts with spectacular offers available now at the Valley Chevy July 4th event. You'll have the freedom to choose from an extensive lineup ready for all adventures ahead. Including popular models like the legendary Silverado. With four powerful engine choices. The road trip ready Equinox blending first class comfort with intuitive tech. And the feature packed Chevy tracks with undeniable value. No matter how you celebrate the 4th of July, it's always better in a Chevy. But don't miss out visit a Valley Chevy dealer near you today.

[Brett]

Holmberg's morning sickness. He ate my underwear, you say?

[Listener]

How's he still alive?

[Brett]

That's like £4. Like in a parachute. Oh no. These were tiny little thong sexy underpants. Clearly not yours.

[Rocky Moselle]

It says Boner garage.

[Holmberg]

You're a fat pig.

[Brett]

This is a real good kill here. I might even frame these.

[Listener]

Let me see them.

[Brett]

No, this is definitely a girl in college. These are college panties. You, you're shaped like a college.

[Listener]

What are you saying?

[Brett]

Saying you could drop a few pounds. I'm not a people doctor, but I do know about hearts. You're fat. You're going to die soon. That's why your husband's banging at. You know these damn.

[Holmberg]

Gather around everyone.

[Brett]

Look at how hot these panties are.

[Holmberg]

He takes them home to his wife all covered in stomach bile.

[Brett]

You got to start wearing stuff like this.

[Patrick Riley]

You're the size of old main.

[Brett]

It is you. Yeah, I mean you. You like a building. And panties would be like a fumigation tent. Like if a dog ate a fumigation tent that said panties on them. I would know they're yours. But this dog ate baby hot girl panties. Which tells me truthfully that you're not getting it done at home. So here you go. He's underwear in a bill.

[Listener]

I'm not touching that whores underpants.

[Brett]

Not what your dog said. Your dog and your mate. They've been eating that area that lady for a long while now. A dog saw the old man doing it. He thought I want a piece of that. Where do I get some? It's like there's some remnants in the stuff on the floor. He ate it right up to.

[Holmberg]

Yeah but anyway so just you know. And if you're a. Don't leave your panties laying around where the puppy can eat them. And then leave without panties. If you showed up with panties as a whore, leave with panties as a quality whore. You don't leave those laying around.

[Rocky Moselle]

Have a checklist unless you want them discovered.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, put on your phone. Yeah, but if they're gone, you had to look. They're missing. Then, then the real like they could be laying around.

[Brett]

Anyway.

[Holmberg]

Brett's right. Have a check. I showed up.

[Brett]

I had watch.

[Holmberg]

I bought a bag of Q tips.

[Brett]

I got myself a couple of rings all on my finger.

[Holmberg]

Oh, panties.

[Brett]

Forgot my panties. Gotta look around for them.

[Holmberg]

Here they are.

[Brett]

Those aren't mine. Those are gargantuan. That's like a trailer cover, right? These are the worst panties. I guess you can't call them panties. Anymore Suit. I call it a suit.

[Holmberg]

A butt suit.

[Listener]

Mine are small at my bottom.

[Holmberg]

Right.

[Brett]

We're looking for the little ones this time. Right. All these broads keep leaving their underpants.

[Holmberg]

On the ground for. And you know you're gross. If you get a puppy at your house and you leave peonies on the. And they don't want anything to do with them because puppies love women's underwear. Love it. Love it.

[Rocky Moselle]

Because you're laying around all the time.

[Holmberg]

I wonder if they're. Yeah, hers are safe. He looks at that.

[Brett]

I can't eat that.

[Holmberg]

I can't eat all that. That's disgusting.

[Brett]

If dad ain't eating it, I ain't eating it. I should see what Dad's got as his lunch every time you're gone. My goodness. Panties. So small.

[Holmberg]

Very digestible. But that's a good puppy. You know, helping out a bro worked for a while. Yeah, it worked until.

[Brett]

I can't eat any more panties. Dad. I'm getting sick. I'm a cocker spaniel.

[Holmberg]

Not a great team.

[Brett]

You gotta get a bigger dog, dad. There's so many panties. You make me eat. Eat the panties. I don't want to. Move out.

[Rocky Moselle]

What is that coming out of his bum?

[Listener]

Is he pooping? Those are someone's panties.

[Brett]

Dogs and everything. I heard he was at the neighbor's house the other day to go rescue. He must be in the panties there. You know the hot neighbor down the road? I don't remember her name.

[Holmberg]

Phyllis or Maleficent?

[Brett]

I'm not sure. But either way, he's eating her panties, not yours, clearly. He'd be dead. He'd be more panty than dog if he ate your bloomers. My God, lady, what are you saying? You got huge underpants. What I'm saying you know it and I know it. Let's not beat around the bush here.

[Rocky Moselle]

Gotta eat by 10 of Guy Fieri.

[Brett]

Speaking of bush, saying Flavor town, you got an awful lot of that, too. Why don't you go put on your top or whatever it is you call underwear.

[Listener]

Dog doesn't eat my underwear.

[Holmberg]

Why?

[Brett]

Nobody wants. Hey. First one with his hand up. No one wants to go down there. I'm not going where your panties live. I've seen coastal shore algae catchers that do less work than your panties. I feel sorry for your pants because they're just sitting there on the brink of trouble. Or all times those panties give way, it's going to be tsunami of gross.

[Listener]

I've got to take dog to the vet.

[Holmberg]

I wonder if he Was nervous about it.

[Listener]

That dog's not feeling well. I've got to take him to vet. I think he's eaten something.

[Brett]

Oh, crap.

[Rocky Moselle]

You'd had no idea.

[Holmberg]

I don't know.

[Patrick Riley]

Yeah, I don't think so.

[Holmberg]

There were missing panties in the house.

[Rocky Moselle]

Well, he didn't know that.

[Holmberg]

Sure he did. That whore came and left without her underwear. Everyone knew.

[Patrick Riley]

He didn't know.

[Holmberg]

When's the last time you went to somebody's house, changed your clothes, and then went home and went, oops, where's my underwear?

[Brett]

Never.

[Holmberg]

So she got up out of the bed, knowing her underwear wasn't on, and left without him.

[Patrick Riley]

Orange juice Jones was toweling off when she was getting dressed.

[Holmberg]

Do the check.

[Brett]

Okay.

[Rocky Moselle]

I was thrown in. Maybe she did that on purpose.

[Holmberg]

Left panties on the ground. Yeah, and then the dog ate.

[Rocky Moselle]

Like the guy will have, you know, hide something under the bed.

[Holmberg]

But you think that that girl is so cavalier, she's gonna put the panties where they'll be found. And he wouldn't have seen that. He's cleaning the scene of the crime. He's not gonna see panties on the ground and go, you can put your underwear back on, slut. And it goes for men too, if you're a.

[Rocky Moselle]

Unless it was hired.

[Holmberg]

I think they would.

[Rocky Moselle]

Well, maybe not call him back.

[Holmberg]

Prostitutes. Yeah, prostitutes don't leave anything laying around. Again, they're professionals. They don't leave their underpants.

[Rocky Moselle]

Could have been a rookie.

[Holmberg]

You don't. That is the most first night on the job. I don't know how you're. I don't how you're defending any of that. That is the most rookie move a human being can make. Did I have underwear on when I got here? Yeah, I don't know where that is. Anyway, I'll just keep going. Unless there was a quick escape. Yeah, and the guy shoved the underwear down the dog's throat. Or the dog ate the underwear and they both knew it. Couldn't find him While they were in the throes of goof. The dog ate him.

[Listener]

Is that.

[Brett]

Your dog's eating my underpants? Well, I'll just have to clean his poop real close. And then the dog. Oh, I'm sick.

[Rocky Moselle]

Watching him for a couple of days.

[Brett]

Dad, that hooker's underwear's made my belly go crazy. Gotta take me to vet.

[Holmberg]

Now.

[Brett]

You'll be all right. You'll poop it out. It's all right. I've eaten underwear before.

[Holmberg]

And then it happened.

[Brett]

Yep.

[Holmberg]

Too bad.

[Patrick Riley]

What a way to get caught.

[Holmberg]

Yes. That's brutal.

[Brett]

Do your underwear even fit in a draw, let alone a cocker spaniel? You're crazy.

[Holmberg]

And she. I bet she had him laying on the table when he got home, all covered in digestive juice and goo in a bag.

[Listener]

Explain this.

[Brett]

Yeah, I thought you killed someone. And this is the evidence remaining.

[Listener]

I'm gonna kill you.

[Rocky Moselle]

Turns it on her. Are you having an affair?

[Brett]

What are these panties doing in our kitchen in a b covered in dog bile?

[Holmberg]

Yeah, it's a rough one. It's not good.

[Brett]

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