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Homburg
You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. All right, just a Note that the three venues will all be closed on July 4th. That's Friday night. That doesn't mean there's a lack of comedy though, because we have Francisco Ramos coming in on Saturday at Stand Up Live Run on Hirshberg and Camp Bertrand, Thursday, Saturday, Sunday at Tempe Improv and John Heffron's going to be at the Desert Ridge Improv on Thursday, Saturday, Saturday and Sunday as well. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com this.
Brady
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Homburg
It's good to be on top, isn't it? Yeah. So get on top and ride with the top morning show in town and the Best of Homburg's morning sickness. 98 Kupda and then another lady goes on. I watched this thing last night I loved. She got abducted by aliens and they took her eggs. What? She went literally up in a spaceship and they swiped her eggs and then put her back. And she knew it. She said the aliens came and got her, took her to another dimension and then she was in her spaceship. And then she woke up and she knew her eggs were. Have they confirmed she's eggless? No, no. They grew back. They do that. But they swiped. They harvested a few and then popped her back to normal. She broke that. So the car broke down in the middle of the road. That's the key. That's what aliens are looking for. Little car trouble. Aliens look for car trouble. So she just picked up her groceries at the Piggly Wiggly down there in Alabama and got abducted or what? Yeah, ironically, they're not saying where she's from, but very peculiar. Anyway, on my way back to the trailer park, she was in the middle of the road. She alleges her vehicle came to a. Like a halt right where the beings were like, oh, no, my car doesn't work. And now these aliens are here. The next thing she knew, two hours had passed and she was at her friend's house. She was determined to uncover what just happened. She sought the help of a hypnotist who, two decades later, and the memories had unearthed that what had happened was they swiped her egg. So when the car rolled to a stop, I looked through the windshield and my eyes kept trying to change what I was seeing because it wasn't a human and I just couldn't recognize it. It had green eyes and a mouth that didn't open. His hat was a tight fitting cap. I put my head down. I was shaking. I thought, well, I'm gonna die. He called my name, said, sherry, we've been waiting for you. Then he told me to get out of the car. Two guys behind with wands came over and grabbed hold of me. A gray claw grabbed my arm, pulled me out of the car, and as soon as they touched me, I stopped shaking and I was calm. The main guy looked familiar. I said, there's work to be done. We are from another dimension. Chillingly, she says she was led towards a field where she said they put her in an otherworldly vehicle and said the silver scouts ship around 20ft in diameter. And it was just. They were just there for her. The head honcho Sherry refers to as Da entered the ship and beckoned her to follow. When she initially resisted, she said her first steps inside the craft got cold. Then she passed out, woke up at a buddy's house and was eggless. I don't know how you know when you're eggless, but don't tell that lady she's pretty because you could lose her job. She's crazy. Hey, that chick over there that's been abducted by aliens, she looks nice today. Don't say anything. Talk to her about the alien abduction. That's more normal than telling her she's pretty now. Hey, Sherry, how you doing since the alien abduction? Better. You know, I'm still having some tough days. Just wanted to let you know I thought you looked pretty rape. What? Me? Aliens took your ovaries? Da. Da. I need Da to come save me from the ugly guy who thinks I look nice in my low cut blouse. Rape. Ladies, you need to calm down. Got an email from you guys. John, we have a guy in our office who just turned 82 years old. We had a party here for him and everything. He's doing the same job for 50 plus years and all the women think, oh, it's great. Isn't that wonderful? But you are right. This guy, because I talked to him, has gambled and sexed his way out of all his money and three marriages. Nothing about him working at 82 is fun or cute. He has to do it and it's pathetic. I don't look at that. I look at people working into their 80s and I'm like, oh, you blew it, De Niro. I don't know about actors. It's different for them because ego plays such a massive part. I don't know how you let go of like, he got it. The world's most famous. Oh, dear Times, they're saying the reason I'm doing it. But De Niro does terrible movies because he's still gotta, yeah, you know, let's keep up the lifestyle. So he'll do horrible movies like Bad Grandpa, you imagine. But we've seen it in radio. I remember there was a guy named Freddy Snakeskin. Seemed like a nice guy. He's like, I was flying high, I was a K rock and I did this and Then a peak of that. I'm like, did you guys make a lot of money? He goes, oh, ye. And I looked over at his car, which was a like a 1980 Ford Ford Ltd turquoise. And I'm like, why do you drive that car? Thinking like, is that a cover? And he goes, no, it's all broke. He's doing weekends here in Phoenix. And I'm like, no kidding? And I said, well, what did you do with your money? And he just pointed to his nose. I'm like, oh, you coked your way out of everything. He goes, yep. I said, so you have to do this. Yeah, I'm trying to get back into business.
Brady
Pathetic.
Homburg
And then you see like old men. Like, I think the one guy I love, and I hope it's not true and I don't know him was Steve Goddard. Because Goddard worked in this city for years. Oh, he went to country for a while. Oh, he was, he was the best. And later he works at Oldies 92.7 down the hall. I don't know how old Steve is, but I hope he's doing it because he loves it. He doesn't have to come in the building. I think he does. That's. I think with him. Yeah. Yeah. I think he just records stuff for an hour a day and has fun doing that. He's not working. He's not in the work environment. He's not humping. But if he, you know, if I came back here in 30 years just to reminisce and McFeely's still doing middays, that's, it's, that's a bad thing. I love it, man. We have to stop acting like it's good because then they'll say, isn't it great that you worked here? In fact, let's move that retirement age to like 78 since it's so awesome to work that long. I mean, none of us want to work five day work weeks. What are we applauding work until you're 80, for one thing. We're fighting constantly is actually going to the office. Now they have a new problem called the, the what are. The quiet vacation or the secret the Sea Cation or something like that where you're secretly on vacation but you pretend to work. Like you say you're working from home and bosses hate it. But people are on. They're in like, like Toledo. He's like going to Thailand. But if he was zooming, he could go. And you can go anywhere you want as long as you got your laptop. With the way things are set up and bosses hate it for some reason because they're like, damn it. No, you're supposed to work. You're working. I am working here. I want you coming in here. You're on some goddamn beach all the time. When you think about it, it's like, well, why not? If you've allowed them to have just laptops as an office, that's anywhere they want to be. You're producing, right? Yeah. You're getting it done. You're finishing your job. You just happen to be in a glorious resort in Australia. You're getting the times right. That's all that matters. Holmberg's morning sickness. But yeah, if we keep acting like working in our 80s as an adorable news story that everybody should just go, this is wonderful, isn't it? They're going to move that retirement age. That's. That's quietly trying to make everybody feel great about it. Ladies don't fall for it. Cute old people working is sad. I hate that you walk into a like Walmart or something. You see that old man, he just. It's sad to me. All that dude is, is miserable at home. He's tired of that lady that's been living with him for ages. He hasn't had a good knob. And in probably four presidential cycles. And he just sits there and says hi to people. Cause that's his contribution to society. It's pathetically sad. At the sample people at Costco. Same thing. Yeah. Yes. All you want is them to just be free with your life. Keep it up, people. Keep it up. Yeah. Brady doesn't mind. We're not killing the samples. Brady, calm down. The samples stay. We just don't want some 90 year old to be forced to interact with society that way. I don't want to be at home with my husband anymore. I want to kill him. Have a chick McNugget. Have a little nugget. They're good for you. Real fish. And if you want to go in the back, you can take those trousers off. Oh, the old fashioned lady sample. Something else. I got a wad of salmon in my drawers that needs a good tasting. Oh, you remind me of my husband. Because he won't do it either. You know, maybe for some of them it's like, I'd rather be out there than sitting in the staring at that wife of mine. Well, you know, if they, if they move to a. Look, if you're homebound, you shouldn't be working. If you're in a facility where you have a button on your door in case you can't breathe anymore. I don't mean they're not because there.
Brady
Is that in between period where you're.
Homburg
Just, you know, kind of live in an apartment, a senior and you don't.
Brady
Need the full care yet you feel like those people.
Homburg
Like my mom would be in that to a degree. She's like, oh, I'm living here, but I'm not one of those people. She ain't going to work. Get her out there and do stuff. She likes to golf and play tennis and drink all day. That's the goal we should all shoot for, not keep a job till you're 80. If your mom took on a job right now, you'd be like, what are you doing? Yeah, I want to feel valuable. Well, that's, that means your kids aren't doing the job, your people around you aren't making you feel valuable. The best of the morning sickness is on the air.
Brady
This Fourth of July. July celebrate family fun and the freedom to save with your Valley Chevy dealers. It all starts with spectacular offers available now at the Valley Chevy July 4th event. You'll have the freedom to choose from an extensive lineup ready for all adventures ahead, including popular models like the legendary Silverado with four powerful engine choices, the Road Trip ready Equinox blending first class comfort with intuitive tech, and the feature packed Chevy Trax with undeniable value. No matter how you celebrate the 4th of July, it's always better in a Chevy. But don't miss out. Visit a Valley Chevy dealer near you today.
Homburg
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Brady
Just go to getcopperhead.com that's getcopperhead.com for your two free gifts with purchase.
Homburg
Copperhead.com do any of you people do any actual work? The Best of Homburg's Morning Sickness this segment is brought to you guys by Action Ride Shop. Now if you're thinking about heading up north to hit the slopes for some skiing, some boarding, or if you're just gonna stay down here in the valley and do some mountain biking, Action Ride Shop is your place to be. They got all the Gear and all the knowledge you're gonna need. So check them out online@actionrideshop.com or better yet, just go visit them over there on Gilbert Road and it's Action Ride Shop. Before we do that, I got an email from Kyle, who said during the debates this morning, the best idea I've ever heard. Everyone on death row playing Deal or no Deal for television sake. Every suitcase has a countdown to when the execution occurs. Every few suitcases actually have a gun. A lethal dose injection. Some suitcases push it out for years, some a week or two.
Brady
Oh, but is there an offer from the banker?
Homburg
Right. One is one day and then it goes down to like 10 hours, 5 hours, 1 hour. Now if they pull a gun or an injection, it's over. They die right there. One suitcase is the big winner, though. It's a get out of jail suitcase. They get offers from the banker, although we'll call him the Executioner. Along with the way and how far the execution takes place. This is maybe the world's greatest television show idea ever, ever, ever.
Brady
Okay, so your offer on the table is you get shot now.
Homburg
Well, I don't think they did. If the banker's offering a shot, you just say, no thanks, banker. That seems unreasonable. For my future, I'll say no to that. But how about that idea for a game? Deal or no Deal? You're just watching your stupid neighbors stand up there with their families picking suitcases and maybe walking away with a million bucks. I was rooted against it. I wanted somebody to leave with a penny. Everybody, right? Nobody wants to see somebody do that on tv. But if it's a dude on death row and he's out of appeals and he agrees to go on Deal or no Deal with the idea that maybe at the end of this, you get executed tonight or there's a get out of free thing.
Brady
Could that be one of the suitcases? You get one more appeal.
Homburg
An appeal case? No, that would be a banker's thing. Now the appeals are done. It's out of the court's hands. We can't. Don't bring the courts back in because that just. That makes the show boring. It's now or it's nothing.
Brady
I'll take the appeal, Johnny.
Homburg
Yeah, I like that. Finally, a reason to watch Deal or no Deal. You use prisoners. We've been seeing it in movies for years. I mean, Running man and Idiocracy. Death Race. Yeah, Death Race. It was like, you take these prisoners who are on death row, got nothing to win or lose, and you give them A chance. And if. And you know. And they're monitored from there on out, depending on their crime. Now, we can't have the Puppy Stomper or anybody like that. Although, you know, it has to be a guy who's been in there for a long, long, long time. You know? Saw a lady last night displaying that ankle bracelet loud and proud right there at the Doobie Brothers. She wore a short skirt and an ankle bracelet. Really? Yeah. My guess is she blows a lot of things to start cars. Exactly.
Brady
I was just gonna say.
Homburg
She had an ankle bracelet on. And those are not easy to hide. Evidently, that thing looked like a rock record player.
Brady
Jimmy, will you come in here and blow mama's car?
Homburg
Yeah. She's got a phonograph on her ankle. It's huge. Blow my car. Have you ever blown start somebody's car for him? No. No. Once you did. Yeah. I felt bad.
Brady
Shut up.
Homburg
Yeah, I didn't feel good about it.
Brady
Had they been drinking?
Homburg
Oh, yeah. Not a ton. Come on. Yeah. And that was. That was when that whole. That whole apparatus was brand new. That was in the 90s. That was a brand new.
Brady
Right when it came out, I guess.
Homburg
I don't know. She didn't have it. Blow starter car. She was an intern at the Zone. Like, what? Wait a minute. Huh? Yeah. Our intern needed blowstart car.
Brady
You get a little. You get a little friendly with her.
Homburg
Is that the one? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Not this one. This was a. This one was bananas. In fact, I would assume today. Dead. Okay, I'm gonna assume two things. Probably dead. Also, when she needs to blow start her vehicle, it also is her home. Oh, okay. That would be my guess. She was crazy. But she's in the parking lot. I'm in my Jeep. You help me out. What's the matter? We went out for lunch and I can't go home. Like, what's going on? And she explained the apparatus to me and it was complicated. It was everywhere. It looked like an octopus in her car. It was huge. And what do I have to do? He's blowing this and my car will start. That's kind of neat, actually. And then it did some sort of register and I don't know if it made a noise. Deep screen. Thank you so much. Do you want me to suck your. No, no, no. You can leave. Are you sure? What did I just do? Did I just put a drunk on the road? Uh huh. Bye. Oh, no. I really didn't know what I was doing. No. The young Beth McDonald. She has a huge dick. Daddy, her balls look like a bowling ball. They're gigantic. 12 pounds each. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Podcast Summary
Episode Date: July 2, 2025
Episode Title: Woman Says UFO Abducted Her And Stole Her Eggs - Working Into Your 80s Emails/Comments - BO
Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Duration: Approximately 16 minutes
Timestamp: 02:00 - 07:10
The episode kicks off with a captivating and bizarre story shared by John Holmberg about a woman named Sherry who claims to have been abducted by aliens. According to Sherry’s account:
Abduction Details: Her car broke down on the road, which she believes was the clue that attracted the aliens. She was taken aboard a spaceship where the extraterrestrials "swiped" her eggs (ovaries) before returning her to Earth.
Physical Description of Aliens: Sherry describes the aliens as having green eyes, mouths that didn’t open, and wearing tight-fitting caps.
Aftermath: Upon returning, Sherry realized her eggs were missing but they eventually grew back. This incident has left her determined to uncover the truth, even seeking the help of a hypnotist to recover her memories.
The co-hosts engage in a humorous and skeptical discussion about the plausibility of the story, poking fun at the idea of aliens targeting individuals with car troubles.
Timestamp: 07:10 - 11:43
John Holmberg introduces a segment focusing on listener emails and comments, particularly addressing the topic of individuals working into their 80s.
Email from a Listener Named BO: BO shares a story about an 82-year-old man who has been working in the same job for over 50 years. Despite personal struggles, including financial issues and multiple marriages, he continues to work solely out of necessity.
Discussion on Retirement Age: The hosts debate the societal expectations of the retirement age, questioning whether it's beneficial or detrimental for individuals to work well into their later years.
Contrast with Active Seniors: Brady expresses admiration for active seniors who engage in hobbies and maintain a fulfilling lifestyle without the pressures of work.
The conversation highlights differing perspectives on aging and work, emphasizing the importance of personal fulfillment over societal expectations.
Timestamp: 12:42 - 15:05
John Holmberg presents a creative and darkly humorous idea submitted by a listener named Kyle, proposing a revamped version of the popular game show "Deal or No Deal."
Kyle's Idea: Transform "Deal or No Deal" into a high-stakes game for death row inmates, where each suitcase contains a deadline for execution or a lifeline that could delay their fate.
Execution Mechanism: The host, referred to as the Executioner, would offer inmates deals where they can choose to accept their immediate fate or take a chance with the contents of a suitcase that could grant them more time.
Entertainment Value vs. Ethical Concerns: The hosts discuss the ethical implications of such a show, balancing the entertainment aspect against the gravity of its premise.
The segment serves as a thought-provoking satire on reality TV's extremes, pushing the boundaries of entertainment concepts.
Timestamp: 15:50 - End
The episode concludes with the hosts sharing humorous anecdotes and engaging in light-hearted banter.
Incidents with Ankle Bracelets: Stories are shared about individuals conspicuously wearing ankle bracelets, leading to amusing interactions and misunderstandings.
Humorous Encounters: The hosts reminisce about past experiences involving blowing up cars with starter devices and the complexities that come with such situations.
Final Remarks: The episode wraps up with playful exchanges, maintaining an entertaining and casual atmosphere until the end.
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness blends intriguing stories with humorous discussions, tackling unusual topics like alien abductions and societal views on aging, all while maintaining a light-hearted and entertaining tone. The hosts effectively engage with listener contributions, offering both thoughtful commentary and comedic relief.
Notable Quotes:
For more engaging discussions and entertaining segments, tune in to Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD weekdays from 5:30 AM to 10:00 AM or visit www.98kupd.com.