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Brett Vesely
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Brett Vesely
Hey Byron, I heard you have something new to announce from MMP Guns, Brett.
Byron
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Brett Vesely
Well, can you do this to my gun?
Byron
We can do it to nearly any firearm. Doesn't matter where you live, you can ship it to us or we already have completed firearms in inventory daily with no weight.
Brett Vesely
Well, there you have it. MMP Guns on the northeast corner of 12th street and Indian School or online at MMP gunscustoms.com It's Brett Vesely from Holmberg's Morning Sickness for Game Day Men's Health. Look, guys don't want to talk about or even think about things like testosterone replacement, erectile dysfunction, weight loss or even peptide treatment. You figure, hey, I'm just getting older. It is what it is. Don't believe me? Then you really need to check out Game Day Men's Health. They're your go to men's health experts. Everything is done in house. None of this go here for a consultation, then go over here to have your labs done, then back again. I don't know about you, but that's a huge waste of time. So check them out online at gameday men's health.com.
John Holmberg
You'Ve been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. Good morning everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Monday post vacation weekend. Big old Fourth of July celebration. It is 5:45. It's the morning sickness. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett, there's big Dick Toledo. We're off and Running, ready to go. Brady's being. Brady's currently. Have to fix this.
Brett Vesely
Blinded.
John Holmberg
Well, it's not even that. He looks like Glenn Close from the Natural right now, and I can't. He's, like, glowing. If Brady was a video game, he'd be the next character I'm supposed to talk to.
Brady
Just win.
John Holmberg
Definitely lit differently than everyone else. Yeah. Back. And everybody's back from their Fourth of July, the big super summer break. It's awesome. Everything's fun when it comes to that. And the reason I love 4th of July so much is because the two next steps are my birthday and football season. It's, like, right around the corner. Football starts in, like, two weeks. It's awesome. There's camps. You got all that stuff. Preseason will be.
Brady
I thought you meant actually show stuff on tv.
John Holmberg
Oh, they show stuff on tv. Brady, if you're a Fuller. Oh, yeah.
Brady
No, they're.
John Holmberg
You're a Bengals fan. You guys are passive. You don't count.
Brady
I meant preseason games like that.
John Holmberg
Oh, that's all. That's three weeks away. It's the first week, August. It's gonna knock you out. It's coming right around the corner, man. So I get excited now because 4th of July usually means. All right, that's enough of that. Everybody gets back to work with summertime stuff, and then we go watch football, which is so close. And that's just really, basically the only joy that you have after a certain amount of time is the football season. Everything else is work or, you know, struggle with this or doing that, and you're looking at the same people every day. And then football happens. Conversations you can't miss. And I say that only because Brett starts the day off with reading one of the texts from the weekend that evidently there was a fight quickly between a listener and one of our weekenders, and it just got a guy to fire off. Quit being anti Trump. Like, damn it, stop bashing on Trump. And it's like, what weekend, guys? We're trying to figure it out. Yeah. I don't know.
Brett Vesely
We know it's not Brandon.
John Holmberg
No, it's not. Love, Brandon. Love is. And he's. Is he a. He likes Trump more than.
Brett Vesely
Yeah, he's a libertarian.
John Holmberg
He's a wild libertarian. Like, he's, like, odd. Oh, yeah. I like it. And then. Yeah. So it can't be. I mean, Chris Kelly. Would he. He's not going to go do that. So it's either Jeff Vella. No, I don't say.
Brett Vesely
I mean, maybe, but I don't know.
Brady
No, he gets to keep his tips now.
John Holmberg
That's true, fellas. Yeah. People tip him.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
For above and beyond service. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Really? I didn't think so. It might be just a. I don't think that's accurate.
Brady
That's what he calls them tips.
John Holmberg
So we're trying to figure out which weekend guy pissed off and got all political. Like he went full green day on somebody on the weekend. And. Yeah. And football being back means. And I was telling you guys off there, I was riding my bike on the canal. I was heading down over actually close to here, and I got to about. I guess that's 64th Street, 60 something street in Indian School. And I had to flop off the canal and get from the canal to the other canal and just jump over Indian School. And there were two older dudes yelling at each other in the middle of the day about Trump. And that one guy was mad about tips and the other guy was screaming fascism. And I'm like, what are they. What are they angry about? And like you said, Brett, they're in their 60s. If you're still working for tips in your 60s. Yeah.
Brett Vesely
Just hang yourself. Yeah, that's over.
John Holmberg
I mean, I understand getting a few tips, but you should be. You should probably be doing a little bit different than. I don't know, maybe you're just a great limo driver. I can't figure out what you do in your 60s and just live off of. I guess I suppose that's a thing. But just a football. It'll fix everything. And a couple of. We're getting to that point where we haven't had anything to look at a guy and go, how about that game? Like, it hasn't happened in four months, five months. Since we've really always had something to talk about. And we filled time for those four months. But right after the Fourth of July is when we start to realize without it, we're gonna fight. And so it starts. It's getting close.
Brady
You know, speaking of the tip, the tip experience I had was staying at the hotel, and they said, you know, for. They charge you $40 a day for parking. Yeah, but 45 includes valet service.
John Holmberg
Wait a minute.
Brady
So it's for $5 more.
John Holmberg
Go park the car.
Brady
Well, that's what I'm saying. And they're saying, no, that. That covers the valet.
John Holmberg
No, it doesn't.
Brett Vesely
Like, yeah, if you're an ass.
Brady
I did it.
John Holmberg
Yeah.
Brady
You know, and I still.
John Holmberg
Yeah, you can't do it.
Brady
You tip the guy.
John Holmberg
Of course you tip the guy. He's doing that's, that's actually where tipping. Like he's doing your service. So long as they get the car. I don't. What is going on with this thing.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
See, the music's going crazy. Goddamn Trump hating part timers messing with our stuff. Yeah. Just turning on and off on its own now, Michael, he'll fix it, but. Yeah. I don't know why that's happening.
Brady
Shorting out.
John Holmberg
No clue why that's happening. I'm just going to switch over to this, see if we can make that work. That's. Yeah, it feels like there may be a small fire developing. And that wouldn't be so bad if this building burned down, would it? I don't think. You know, I don't care. I'll probably get charged for it.
Brett Vesely
Yeah, yeah.
John Holmberg
Anyway, get your checkbook out. Besides that. Yeah. The tip thing goes. If, if the valet guy gets your car, he gets a tip. But if I can see my car from where he is, I, I struggle with tipping a valet guy when I can actually see the car.
Brett Vesely
When you walk 30ft, when I can.
John Holmberg
Still like have conversation with you while you're getting in and I'm at the thing, I'm like, I can do this. Like, just give me the keys and then I gotta give you like 10 bucks or something like that. Come on. That's crazy. I like that. At the Rah Rah room, they walk you to your car. It's a little weird.
Brett Vesely
They walk you to your car.
John Holmberg
Yeah, yeah. You're parked in a garage. They take you right off the bat.
Brett Vesely
So they don't drive your car?
John Holmberg
Yeah, at first. Then they park it. And then at the end of the night, I went out there. Well, they'll go get it. Oh. But if it's right around the corner, they just walk you to it. Oh, okay.
Brett Vesely
I thought they were escorting you to your car. It's like, I could have did this myself.
John Holmberg
That's what I said. It's like, I don't know. But it. I don't know. I don't understand. I still give the guy money. But it's nice. It's nice to have someone walk into your car. I don't know. It's weird. But you're like, this is high service. You're like, I'm just.
Brett Vesely
I would have class ring at the end too. It's like you walked home after your date.
John Holmberg
I let them finger me and they. We fumble around in the back a little like teenagers at the prom and works out great. Great. And all the traveling that had to Be done, Brady. You went on. Did you go anywhere? You didn't go anywhere. I stuck it out. I'm with you. And I didn't want to deal with any of this as the best story that happened over the entire 4th of July was that a plane for American Airlines had to turn around because some nosy something or other peeked over the shoulder of another person and saw on their text, somebody text them that said R.I.P.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
And they lost their minds. And they're like, oh, so she tells. I guess you're supposed to say something if you see something, but I don't know how many times I've. Every flight, I try to double jinx back, saying, unless this thing ends up in the ground, I'll see you in an hour. Or, you know, chances are this one's going into the dirt. We're gonna land really early, but it's gonna be closer to Flagstaff than it is Vegas. Like that kind of stuff right there. The plane's gonna crash. I make a. A reference. If somebody saw the text and we had to turn around every time, 90% of my flights, someone would see me text something absolutely inappropriate and make kicked in that. Okay, but here's the thing. You're going to know because the authorities are going to come to you and go, can we take a look at your phone? Interstate. Something like, oh, oh, that prick sitting next to me was reading my text. And then you're going to find this out. And I know they probably tap dance around it a little bit like, all right, everyone, we had a security breach. Everyone off the. We need to talk to you. And then the lady that was sitting next to you that's now in another room crying, we need to talk to her. And everybody else said, what's going on? You're going to know who did this. So if you're going to prick around and read people's texts and then get a whole plane diverted, you're. We're going to know.
Brady
Besides, I was thinking diverting the flight. It's still in the air. If it was going to happen.
John Holmberg
Well, that's not true. Brig, you know those flights that left Boston, they had about 30 minutes for before they hit New York.
Brady
Yeah, but if the guy finds out it's being diverted or whatever in his plans, well, they're gonna change up the plans then.
John Holmberg
Well, you know. Yeah, it depends. On. Well, if he has intention to blow the plane up, you solve nothing. All right, so you say. Say nothing. Even if you see a guy strapped with bombs, it's too late.
Brady
Well, no if you see a guy that's trapped with bombs. Yeah, it's probably.
John Holmberg
I mean, it is.
Brady
The odds are that we're gonna turn around.
John Holmberg
Look.
Brady
Okay, then I won't do it.
John Holmberg
You may have changed my mind. Because at that point, what am I supposed to do? We're in the air. And this guy, you didn't catch him. And now it's my job to piss him off some more. Now I think. I think I'm screaming Allah Akbar and I'm going down with him. I think that's. I think that's it. I'd say. I think that's pretty much the end of it. I might.
Brady
And so when they land and he says rip. Yeah. It was more of a dead relative.
John Holmberg
Oh, wait a minute. You don't get texts from dead people.
Brady
Well, no, that's what the. The. His text had. Rip and it was right. My relative that had passed away.
John Holmberg
But you don't get texts from dead people.
Brady
Well, no, I know it's from his relatives saying rip about the other relative that passed away.
John Holmberg
Oh. Oh, I see. Oh, I got confused by.
Brady
That's what the text was.
John Holmberg
Dead. Me too. I don't know.
Brett Vesely
Welcome back.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Yeah. It could be anything.
Brady
He had someone that passed away in his family.
John Holmberg
Rest in peace. Or it could have been like you. You know, you and I could have joked and had that same thing. But you may change my mind once.
Brett Vesely
Maybe he's a big rip torn fan.
John Holmberg
Oh, that could be. He's a big rip guy. There's a lot of those still left. They had just watched dodgeball and thought, you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball. It's like, oh, there's a rip to rip. I love the old rip. A Rip Taylor $1.92 beauty pageant or whatever. That one sickness.
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John Holmberg
Homburg's morning sickness. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. It just. Would you say something?
Brady
You think that would have been able to you could assess that and solve it right there.
John Holmberg
Rip. You'd think so?
Brady
Yeah, it's an rip, Don.
John Holmberg
But I already know what it is. It's some lady who you can see on her face, this isn't gonna be easy. The second she complains and you're like. Or protocol kicks in, all right, she's gonna demand something gets done. I read his text and he's definitely got plans to do something terrible. I think, okay, well. And once you tell the pilot, he probably has to do something where. All right, we got something going on on the plane. We might have to land a little early. And I'm sure the pilots don't flat out say, sounds like we got a terrorist on the plane here. We're going to go ahead and land in San Luis Obispo. They're probably like, we're having some engine trouble. We're going to pop her down here in Tucson and see what's going on. Blow the plane up. Somebody blow the plane up. Just keep going. It doesn't matter. I'm a terrorist. This plane will go to Cuba. Yeah, yeah. Where? Where'd you draw that line? If the guy sits next to you and he goes, I have a bomb. It's too late now.
Brady
You're on. Yeah.
John Holmberg
Pretty rose colored glasses. Yeah. What do you need? Why would we buy. It's gonna take one.
Brett Vesely
That's true.
John Holmberg
You've got a bomb. Walk up there and get us a couple of vodka sodas before. At least make this somewhat pleasurable. You want to drink? You're kind of cool. Had I met you a day or two ago, I probably wouldn't blow up this plane. Yeah, it's. It just seems like nosy people on planes are already bad enough. That's why I always just watch porn on the phone. You want an eyeful, you're gonna get one. I think it's hilarious. I will constantly.
Brady
Won't divert the flight.
John Holmberg
I constantly do things that make it so. If you want to look at my phone, you're gonna find some stuff. Oh, wow. This one. I didn't know. The British Airways flight attendant was arrested for being unclothed on a recent flight. That's got pictures. No, it's. What the. And we still have the 1970s in our mind when we think of flight attendants that.
Brett Vesely
Think of that Pan Am show with Margot Robbins.
Brady
Did you check it out?
John Holmberg
I can't. I can't imagine seeing any flight attendants at all with their clothes off. Being attractive at this point. That is not a group of. That's not The Love Island USA team right there. That's. Although that whole crew just keeps saying slurs and curses and getting kicked off, which is great. This guy says I drive a manual car in valet. Or I drove for Dominic's. Remember that restaurant? Yeah. It's coming back. My girlfriend and I were out for an anniversary. Oh, he has a manual. And the valet parked. I see what he's saying. I read that wrong. And so he gave it to the valet. My girlfriend and I were out for our anniversary and nobody could drive a manual to go get my car, so I had to go get it. And I left my girlfriend at valet at the booth because she had heels on. Didn't want to walk all the way through that parking garage. And the bastards had the audacity to say, hey, a little something for the effort. Yeah, you don't give that guy a tip. How did they park it?
Brett Vesely
He should pay you.
John Holmberg
Absolutely. How did they get it to the parking garage in the first place? The one guy, probably Trevor, went on.
Brett Vesely
Break or something and he couldn't.
John Holmberg
Sorry, dude, I'm on break. Can't get your whip? So. Yeah, I don't think. Yeah, now that Brady's kind of brought it up, I think I might go rose colored glasses on the flight too. If I was sitting next to a dude who's like, I'm going to blow the plane up. Where'd he take off? What am I going to do about it? What, do you want me to fight you? You're still going to explode.
Brady
Tell me why you're doing this.
John Holmberg
I have an idea. I don't need to answer that.
Brady
I have some ideas. But where did it all start?
John Holmberg
Your benevolent, beloved God has talked you into this and it seems like a good idea.
Brett Vesely
See Sonny bono in Airplane 2. Buying the third bomb from the left. Or what?
John Holmberg
In this case, yeah. Tell me where it all started. Brace it. It all started on the. Not 911. Your 911. September of the year one to 711.
Brett Vesely
He tried it with strippers. Why not terrorists, you know, I mean.
John Holmberg
Tell me where it all started.
Brett Vesely
Save you.
John Holmberg
I was born inside of a religion that. Okay, then, never mind. I shouldn't have asked. Shouldn't have asked. Yeah, I guess if he told you I had a bomb or he's texting about his bomb and stuff, I'm looking over, going, blow the plane up. Huh? What do you do for a lit. What? I guess what did you do for a living? Weirdly enough, I work for tips. So it's. I'm kind of in a quandary. The new law is better. I work for Uber. I don't know. It's all weird. The whole week was a strange kind of get up. And then I. And then I saw that Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry are splitting up. And all I saw.
Brady
And he's hooking up with the. Oh, he's the hairdresser in Venice.
John Holmberg
He had. He was seen with Sydney Sweeney, the hairdresser. He had some other chick. And then so she goes on a boat and puts a bikini on and starts taking pictures of her like it was paparazzi, but she's posing in all of them, so it's. She. And then the headline says, I'm the one. Or you're. You're the one who lost here, Orlando. All right. And then you start thinking to yourself, because I remember watching Katy Perry in that annoying. Remember when they were astronauts for eight minutes, her and her friends.
Brady
Yes.
John Holmberg
And they. And they went up and they pretended, played, pretended that they were in space. They were spacemen. And she sang and she did annoying stuff. And then I remember when it came back down, somebody's like, there were shots of Orlando Bloom and he wasn't there. And I didn't put two and two together at the time, but he didn't go. Like, I know anyone I care about goes up in space. I'm go. I'm going to return. I'm going to that.
Brady
Yeah. Well, you're just. That's one of those things where you better go.
John Holmberg
Wives and families. Yeah. Your wife's not gonna be real happy with you if you like, I got other stuff to do. It's like, I'm going into space at, like I. At 8:30, I'll be in space. And then 8:30. 8 I'll be home. Okay. I'll just see at home. Like, you're not gonna get away with that. And he wasn't there. So then I started to think, now, knowing what we know now, he was rooting for that thing to explode. I was.
Brady
No way read, you know, dirt during that whole thing. That he was totally taken back by the whole thing, of course. That like, it's like, you know, oh.
John Holmberg
He didn't want it to be. She's.
Brady
What are you doing?
John Holmberg
This is a pain in the ass.
Brady
This is not history in the making.
John Holmberg
No, no, no. And that might have been why they broke up, because she thinks she's Sally Ride now. But the better part is, deep down, we now, a month or so later, know that Orlando Bloom sat there and quietly hoped for that thing to blow up.
Brett Vesely
Well, submersible was already done. So he's like, all right, how about this one? Let's try this.
John Holmberg
They're not going to do a second ride in the subs. Katie, I've got an idea. The blue origin's going up, and there'll be nobody. It's just remote control. You're going to fly around in a rocket drone. I hate to see Gail go because her and Oprah are a cute couple, but if Katie's on the thing, it's just gonna have to sacrifice everything else. Lauren Sanchez and all that.
Brady
And the highlight was Bezos beefing it, trying to get to the door.
John Holmberg
Oh, yeah, that was the fun of it.
Brady
Like, was that him?
John Holmberg
But, yeah, seriously, start thinking about. There was one man on the planet that thought to himself, if she just goes, it's. I get. Imagine he's getting all of that extra ass based on the fact that he and Katie aren't together. Now, what would have happened had she blown up in that plane or in that rocket? Orlando Bloom would have been God. So in his own way, they probably hated each other. Because if you don't go to. You don't go to your wife's rocket launch, you don't like her at all. Like, it isn't. It's like. It's not a cordial breakout.
Brady
It's a pretty big deal.
John Holmberg
It's not a. It is not an amicable split at that point. You gonna go to my rocket launch at least to just keep up appearances? Now, I hope it explodes. I'm going out with Sydney Sweeney. Yeah. Enjoy the Challenger ride, sister, because I'm done with you. And he had his fingers crossed. And everybody was like, oh, look at Orlando. He wants Katy Perry to come back, but. But you don't know what was going on in his head. And what I would love is to go back and ask him, like, what were you thinking when the rocket took off? Were you like, gosh, I hope this works, or, come on, baby, what pub were you in? Show me that flower. When that was happening, putting a 100 bucks down next to the guy. 100 bucks. If it blows up, you can. It's yours. Katy Perry's husband just gave me 100 quid. He's hoping a rocket explodes. Yeah. This guy says, eight minutes in space and Katy Perry thinks she's an astronaut. That makes me a professional gynecologist since I was 15. All right, calm down. That's kind of funny, but it's also gross. Cause that means you were looking for things wrong. You Weren't in there for pleasure. You were searching for lumps and cysts and oozing and discharge. That's. That's gross. That is gross. Otherwise, it was an uneventful Fourth of July. There was nothing here. Absolutely nothing happened. It was great. And then my Dad's only like, 20 minutes from that flood in Texas. I called him, and I'm like, hey, you're in the. I've never been there. I'm not going all the way over there. He doesn't. Here's the problem with where my dad lives. You can love somebody, only so much. Mileage comes into play. It's almost like a rental car. Would you like to spend extra for extra miles? Like, no, I'm not gonna do that. It's essentially, I'd have to fly to San Antonio, Houston, or Austin. Two of those cities don't have direct, so I gotta bounce up to Denver or something first. And then. So it's like six hours on a plane or go to Houston. They're gonna rent a car and drive for two hours. I don't care about him that much. He'll get here on his own. This is a big city, and he knows where I live. I gotta find it. And he always tells me, he goes, where we live on this. It's not a very big place. We've decided to just have land, and we're building a house on it. So you'd have to stay in downtown Fredericksburg. I don't even know what that is. Now I gotta go to a city I don't know where I am. This sounds awful. Let's just meet in the middle somewhere or whatever. So I called him and I said, you live in hill country in Texas? Yeah. And he said, yeah. Said, how close are you to these floods? Guadalupe. Ruby's like, 20 minutes away from me. I'm like, no kidding. Homer's morning sickness. Magnetic update. Bloomberg's morning sickness. Okay, so you're right in the middle of this. And he goes, oh, yeah. Right in the center of it all. Like, how about that? I said, how much rain have you got? And he texted me, and he said, 3.39.
Brady
What's the gauge?
John Holmberg
And I said, is that 3ft and a third with the inches or you? And then I realized that as Holmbergs, what we do is we're very specific with inches. And I guess that's just a family trait, because what other time in your life would you ever give three point? Would you just say three and a half? 3.39 inches? And I'm like, that's three feet. Like. Like, what are you telling me here? No, no, it's very close to. It's four inches. And I'm like, okay, now I understand when we get. When holmbergs get between 4 and 8 inches, we start adding in the 0 point threes and point twos and all that. So we're. We're taking all we can get. But that was just on his land.
Brady
I know. So when they gauge that, like, if she got an inch of range.
John Holmberg
Yeah.
Brady
Is that based upon the surface that would be water would be an inch above?
John Holmberg
No, no, it's just. It collects. It's a collection of. So you. Have you ever seen a rain water gauge? It's a bucket and it weighs it. Basically. It's just kind of that. So that's how much has fallen in the area. But it doesn't necessarily mean you have an inch of water. It's an inch.
Brady
It would be comparable to having that if it's.
John Holmberg
If it was uniform across the board. Yeah, probably. But I mean, up high, if an inch of water is falling in your spot, it's falling over here. Over here. It starts when you get back to.
Brady
The, you know, Midwest or any place that have big rivers, they show, you know, they have the bridges and the levels, like a 19. You know, someone put the date 1933. Which way?
John Holmberg
Up high. Right. And that's probably after like 3 inches of water because it's, It's. You start getting Neil Degrasse Tyson with that whole thing. It's like the spread of it, the. The, you know, how dry the ground is and how much it's sits, how much it absorbs. But yeah, he went out and it was in like four hours. They had three and a half inches. And he said it hadn't stopped raining since. Last time I checked, we were at 3.39. And I'm like, what the. So that's, you know, that's the 1 4th of July story. That's terrible.
Brady
I told you that I saw video people sitting there. Here comes the flash flood coming down the dry river bed.
John Holmberg
Yeah.
Brady
And the police are like, I need you to guide. Sit back, step back. They're all recording it.
John Holmberg
I think it's time we stopped that.
Brady
I think it's time when 20 people washed away. If they did.
John Holmberg
Good. Well, good.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Because I think it's time we stop that. If you stood in the freeway, it's not a cop's job to go get you off the freeway. If you're just. I just want to See what a car looks like coming at me. Film away.
Brady
We see all those Indian guys standing.
Brett Vesely
Next to trains and taking selfies and stuff in the village.
John Holmberg
You know what you never see Indian cops, right? Yeah. You never see Indian cops. Like, no, no, no, no, no. He should not stand by that. No, no, no. They're just like, there's a lot of Indians. There's a billion of us. A few of them need to get hit. I don't want to see it anymore because I saw that and I saw multiple angles, which means there were TV crews and everything. I have no emotion for weathermen that stand in hurricanes and idiots that want to film a wall of water coming at them. I just, I just. I have a great Nike defense. I know when it's. Sometimes I overshoot it, but I know when it's time to run. I know when it's like, that wall of water looks huge. I'm not gonna stand here. This. I'm first one out of the gates. I don't like any of that stuff. But there's people that film it.
Brady
I'll film it from high grounds.
John Holmberg
I won't film it. I'll watch the news. I'm not going to do a good job of that. Ever watch your own videos? They suck. Yeah, all of them. They're. They all.
Brady
When you're taking them, you think, this is going to be amazing.
John Holmberg
I don't know why people take so many videos of things. They're almost all bad. The only good videos is when your dog's doing something dumb and it's only good to you. You start showing it to other people. The next thing you know, you're walking around with a photo album of annoying crap. Yeah, nobody takes good videos. And if you do, it was an accident. You're not going to be the one that gets the Guadalupe river rush that. Everybody's like, man, I'm a professional and I did a terrible job. You, you nailed it. You're this. You're the star. It's just going to be for you later.
Brett Vesely
Dan didn't send High Yellow down there for some video.
John Holmberg
I didn't ask him if High Yellow was still around. Did you send High Yellow down? Uh huh. He has a friend named Huck. They go down there every once in a while. So, yeah, my dad's right in the middle of that. And then I. I watched the news and they had some pastor on talking about. I had to hand it to the dude on Fox because he was. The pastor was like, miracles are happening each day here in the central Hills of Texas. Two people were saved. Twenty miles down, they got washed and they lived. God is great. And I'm like, There's 81 dead people, you insensitive prick. We're talking about the two. That is the good thing. If he was so great, why did it happen in the first place? Let alone you saved two, you lost 81 and counting. Don't go on TV and start talking about how awesome this is. Shut up. It's terrible. But I. Again, though, I have no sympathy for anyone. You want to stand on the end of a Runway and, like, I want to see what a plane looks like coming right at me. Okay, you're allowed to do that completely. And if you screw up somebody's car or you do something, you got to pay for it. It's got to happen out of your checkbook afterwards. Trust me, they'll ask for it, you'll get it. It's no big deal. But, yeah, just go stand in front of natural disasters and wonder. When we said, brady, you and I went to Hawaii and we walked around that volcano, that was one of the dumbest things I've ever done. There's no purpose to that. It wasn't pretty. We didn't learn anything. It was big and it stunk.
Brady
Look down a vent.
Brett Vesely
Yeah, but it's a Lizzo concert or what?
John Holmberg
Yeah. Yes. It was big, it was ugly, and it stunk. It was Lizzo. She's just laying down with her legs out.
Brady
You pretty much could be in and out in 20 minutes.
John Holmberg
20 minutes. We wandered around, like, waiting for something to happen. They've just. It's just this trail that goes all the way around. You're like, oh, this is a TV moment. I did not need to be here. And the sulfur stinks. And the restaurant was bad, so we.
Brady
Improvised and turned it into a fake tour.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Made fake tours out of it, which is fun, but.
Brady
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Standing next to a volcano, Eh? Why? We do a lot of dumb stuff every day. That's the dumbest you can be as the human. So I don't think the cops, the poor cops, had to go stand by the river just in case idiots wanted to be in it that day. Whenever they have those huge storms and you see that one dude, surfing. God, no. I'm not doing it. I'm not rescuing you.
Brett Vesely
Thanks, Bodhi. Keep going.
John Holmberg
Why'd you rob the bank? You're gonna not enjoy your money.
Brady
Bet you my truck can get through that.
John Holmberg
It's just dumb. But I do have to hand it to pretty much everyone. And the State of Arizona did a good job with its only fireworks from the ground on the weekend. It didn't sound as much like Beirut as normal. So to the veterans and to the dogs, we're working on it. I'm still on your side, guys. I think any veteran of war with a little PTSD hates how Arizona allows you to just blow up whatever you want in your backyard. Got that? Dude won't die. I gotta say, I've been defending a 90 year old veteran in my neighborhood for 10 years now. Like, this dude's impervious. You can launch fireworks now. I'm not gonna defend him anymore. I thought it was like, man, he's in the final stages of his life. He just doesn't die. He's still there. He's got like a 1934 Ford pickup truck in his driveway. It's cool. All four tires are flat and have been forever, but it still looks good. He can't drive that thing. If he walks outside of the house, everybody rustles him back in. So I know he's probably not allowed, but I always worried when people would launch fireworks within a doorway away, that this poor old man sitting in there, just thinking of the Japs and stuff, like that's all that's got to be going through his mind. Is it, drop it again. Put some sunshine on him. Like he just has to flash back. But nobody seems to care about the veterans when it comes to 4th of July or anything like that. They just want to. They just want to watch the boomers go off, the dogs running all over. It wasn't so bad this year. I know it was bad. And I give you 4th of July and New Year's Eve. It's the days before and days after that. I don't understand. Because if you have a grandfather who's been through war, you wander over and go, pop, pop, hey, tomorrow's gonna be loud and then it starts that day. And evidently today's gonna be like, that's when he's gonna lose it. You can prep him for the fourth of July. The sixth, not so much. But they gave you through the weekend. Hopefully you got it out of your system. I didn't see any news stories of people's arms and hands getting blown off. I'm sure Brett will have videos of that later. I'm hoping. But if you're currently walking around with your hand bandaged, I find it hilarious. It's the risks of the fun that you're having.
Brett Vesely
Did you get the flyover? Did they do that big flyover on the 4th. Like the jets coming out of Luke and.
John Holmberg
No. Oh, did they loop the city again? Yeah. What time was that?
Brett Vesely
Six in the morning. No, no.
John Holmberg
Yeah, No, I missed that. What was flying?
Brett Vesely
Not sure that.
John Holmberg
I think they're F35s, but. Okay. Cool.
Brett Vesely
Fighter jets from. From Luke and I guess they were kind of circling the valley in Mesa down in Maricopa.
John Holmberg
They did that during COVID once.
Brett Vesely
Yeah, I think they did it.
John Holmberg
They.
Brett Vesely
They didn't come out as far as us, so.
John Holmberg
I don't know.
Brady
For Mustang, those old P51s, they start.
John Holmberg
Floating those planes all over. Yeah.
Brady
They did a little four band formation, and then another plane went by and spelled out the logo. And in the smoke, the Fantastic Four movie promoting that.
Brett Vesely
I guess there's a commercial following it.
John Holmberg
Well, the military's got to make money, you know. Yeah.
Brady
It wasn't on the. It was a different deal. Wasn't the military.
John Holmberg
Okay. It wasn't the Blue Angels. I was gonna say. Jesus Christ. Don't forget to plop down some cash at the theater.
Brett Vesely
Trump's making some money on that.
Brady
All right.
John Holmberg
The theaters are in trouble. What? Movies are dying. The Blue angel said after the show, we should go watch a terrible Fantastic Four movie. Anyway, what are you gonna do? Happy Fourth, everybody. Now, let's just settle in for the hot summer. My birthday and football. It's right around the corner. We'll have stuff to talk about soon that won't make everyone fight or email the station saying, stop hating Trump. Stop Trump bashing.
Brett Vesely
We announced a contest today, too. That's a volatile thing.
John Holmberg
Oh, that's that happening for sure. Yeah. Oh, nobody started today. I'm not sure I still work here. No one told me we started today. I'm gonna pack up some stuff and get out. Yeah, thank you. Because I. I wasn't. No confirmation from that for me at all. So. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm. I'm pretty sure I'm on thin ice around here. I don't know what's going on. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? A good one. We'll scream it together. 585-9800. It is your turn now to make something happen. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up.
Brady
It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually.
John Holmberg
No membership fees. I've heard enough of this.
Unknown
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John Holmberg
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Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode: 07-07-25
Release Date: July 7, 2025
Host/Author: 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio
Duration: Approximately 34 minutes
Note: Advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections have been excluded from this summary to focus solely on the core discussions.
The episode opens with a discussion about an unusual incident where an American Airlines flight had to turn around after a passenger intercepted and read a "RIP" text message on another passenger's phone. Host John Holmberg delves into the potential consequences of such actions.
John Holmberg (04:17): "If somebody saw me text something absolutely inappropriate and made us turn around, they'd know because the authorities are going to come to you."
Brady Bogen (10:03): "If he has intention to blow the plane up, you solve nothing."
John Holmberg (10:31): "I think I'm screaming 'Allah Akbar' and I'm going down with him. I think that's pretty much the end of it."
The conversation highlights the complexities of in-flight security and the ramifications of passengers invading each other's privacy. John humorously speculates on the inevitable consequences if such privacy breaches continue, emphasizing that authorities would eventually trace the disruption back to the culprit.
The hosts transition to celebrity news, focusing on the alleged breakup between pop star Katy Perry and actor Orlando Bloom. They discuss speculations surrounding the split, touching upon public appearances and personal behaviors.
John Holmberg (17:08): "I saw that Orlando Bloom was seen with Sydney Sweeney, the hairdresser. He had some other chick."
Brady Bogen (18:09): "What are you doing?"
John Holmberg (18:30): "Deep down, we now, a month or so later, know that Orlando Bloom sat there and quietly hoped for that thing to blow up."
The hosts humorously theorize that Orlando Bloom might subconsciously wish for catastrophic events (like rocket explosions) to reconcile or impact his relationship with Katy Perry. They mock the idea of orchestrated disasters affecting personal relationships, blending satire with celebrity gossip.
John Holmberg shares a personal anecdote about his father's proximity to severe flooding in Texas. The discussion delves into the logistical challenges of reaching his father amidst the disaster.
John Holmberg (21:26): "My dad's only like, 20 minutes from that flood in Texas."
Brady Bogen (22:50): "What's the gauge?"
John Holmberg (23:28): "When Holmbergs get between 4 and 8 inches, we start adding in the 0.3s and 0.2s. We're taking all we can get."
John expresses frustration over the inability to swiftly assist his father due to geographical and infrastructural limitations. The conversation touches on the nuances of measuring rainfall and flood severity, reflecting on the inadequacies of emergency response and communication.
The hosts shift to a lighter topic, sharing their personal experiences and opinions on tipping valet attendants. They debate the necessity and etiquette surrounding tipping in different scenarios.
John Holmberg (07:03): "If you can see my car from where he is, I struggle with tipping a valet guy when I can actually see the car."
Brett Vesely (07:28): "When you walk 30ft, when I can."
John Holmberg (07:55): "I still give the guy money. But it's nice to have someone walk you to your car. I don't know. It's weird."
The discussion highlights the dilemmas of tipping based on the level of service perceived. They debate whether visible assistance warrants tipping and share anecdotes that illustrate their differing viewpoints.
John offers a critique of Fourth of July fireworks, emphasizing the impact on veterans and their potential triggers for PTSD.
John Holmberg (29:12): "The State of Arizona did a good job with its only fireworks from the ground on the weekend. It didn't sound as much like Beirut as normal."
John Holmberg (30:00): "If you have a grandfather who's been through war, you wander over and go, pop, pop, hey, tomorrow's gonna be loud and then it starts that day. And evidently, today's gonna be like, that's when he's gonna lose it."
He expresses concern for veterans who might be adversely affected by loud celebrations, advocating for more considerate displays to accommodate those with trauma-related conditions. The hosts discuss the balance between public festivities and respect for individuals who might find such events distressing.
The episode concludes with brief mentions of local events, including a flyover by fighter jets promoting a movie and upcoming football season excitement.
John Holmberg (31:26): "Did you get the flyover? Did they do that big flyover on the 4th?"
Brady Bogen (31:52): "They did a little four-band formation, and then another plane went by and spelled out the logo in the smoke, promoting the Fantastic Four movie."
The hosts reflect on local community events, blending humor with observations about promotional tactics and public engagement through aerial displays.
John Holmberg wraps up the episode by acknowledging upcoming topics like his birthday and the approaching football season, promising more engaging content in future shows.
The episode encapsulates a blend of personal anecdotes, social commentary, and light-hearted banter, offering listeners a comprehensive glimpse into the hosts' perspectives on various current events and personal experiences.
John Holmberg (04:17):
"If somebody saw me text something absolutely inappropriate and made us turn around, they'd know because the authorities are going to come to you."
Brady Bogen (10:03):
"If he has intention to blow the plane up, you solve nothing."
John Holmberg (17:08):
"I saw that Orlando Bloom was seen with Sydney Sweeney, the hairdresser. He had some other chick."
John Holmberg (21:26):
"My dad's only like, 20 minutes from that flood in Texas."
John Holmberg (29:12):
"The State of Arizona did a good job with its only fireworks from the ground on the weekend. It didn't sound as much like Beirut as normal."
John Holmberg (33:39):
"Happy Fourth, everybody. Now, let's just settle in for the hot summer. My birthday and football. It's right around the corner."
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness provides a multifaceted exploration of personal, social, and local topics, all delivered with the hosts' characteristic humor and candidness. From in-flight security mishaps and celebrity breakups to concerns about natural disasters and community celebrations, the show offers listeners a rich tapestry of discussions reflective of current events and personal narratives.