07-14-25 - BR - MON - Questioning Indiana Fever's Shine Billboard - It's Natl Nude Day And Mac n Chz Day - Yogurt On Your Windows Can Cool House 6 Degrees - Smuggler's News Guy Steals Boat On A Date Goes To Cuba

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Episode Summary (July 14, 2025)

Hosted by John Holmberg with Co-Hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Larry McFeely

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**1. Indiana Fever's "Can't Block My Shine" Billboard Controversy

The episode opens with a heated discussion about a controversial billboard by the Indiana Fever, a WNBA team. John Holmberg expresses offense at the "Can't Block My Shine" slogan displayed on a 20-story building in Indianapolis, questioning its cultural and racial implications.

John Holmberg (03:43):
"They have one of the bill. You know, they decorate those sides of buildings as advertisements now. Well, they're really excited about the WNBA coming to town. And one of the buildings says can't block my shine now. I for one, am offended."

Holmberg criticizes the representation and messaging of the billboard, emphasizing his role as an activist against perceived racial insensitivity. The hosts delve into the impact of such advertisements on the local community and the broader societal implications.

John Holmberg (05:24):
"I'm probably the most active person in the world. I'm the best activist anybody's got. Because I know what racism is from being raised white."

2. Handling Listener Emails and Racial Sensitivity

The conversation shifts to addressing listener emails concerning racial issues. Holmberg admits his difficulty in responding effectively to such topics as a white individual, highlighting the complexities of discussing race.

John Holmberg (02:18):
"I don't know how to respond to black people emails. As a white I'm like I don't know how to play either."

This segment underscores the challenges of navigating sensitive conversations and the importance of informed and respectful dialogue.

3. National Celebrations: Nude Day and Mac & Cheese Day

The hosts transition to discussing national observances, starting with National Nude Day and National Mac and Cheese Day. They explore the origins and societal perceptions of these celebrations with their characteristic humor.

Brady Bogen (09:39):
"Happy National Nude Day."

John Holmberg (09:56):
"Monday ends up being the most stressed out. It's stress hormone."

The interplay between these observances serves as a foundation for broader conversations about cultural norms and personal freedoms.

4. Yogurt Hack for Home Cooling

A humorous segment introduces a trending hack claiming that applying yogurt to windows can reduce indoor temperatures by up to six degrees. The hosts skeptically evaluate the practicality and potential downsides of this method.

Brady Bogen (18:35):
"A researcher in the UK has found a way to keep your home more than 6 degrees cooler. This hack. You ready for this? Covering your window with yogurt."

John Holmberg (19:22):
"I agree. Just call all pro shades. Yeah. And shade up your windows tent."

Their banter highlights the show's blend of current trends with comedic critique, questioning the feasibility and effectiveness of such unconventional solutions.

5. Smuggler's News: Boat Theft and Cuba Incident

In the "Smuggler's News" segment, the hosts recount the story of Floyd de Vassiere, a 38-year-old Texan who stole a rented 26-foot fishing boat during a date and attempted to sail to Cuba. The narrative unfolds with Holmberg mocking the logistics and potential consequences of such an escapade.

Brady Bogen (21:41):
"There's a 63-year-old guy from Texas facing charges after he stole a boat in Key West."

John Holmberg (22:52):
"How close was. He? Thought Cuba and Florida were 90 miles apart."

The tale serves as both an entertaining anecdote and a commentary on smuggling, international boundaries, and the lengths individuals might go for personal adventures.

6. Regional Accents and Media Recognition

The discussion moves to a new survey ranking Cajun, Long Island, and Mississippi accents as the most loved regional accents in America. The hosts humorously critique these choices, particularly targeting the Long Island accent.

Brady Bogen (21:03):
"Number one, Cajun."

John Holmberg (21:11):
"Long Island, Long Island. That's the worst."

Additionally, they touch upon the proliferation of local awards, questioning the significance of multiple Emmy recognitions and the dilution of prestigious accolades.

John Holmberg (14:53):
"The Emmys are good if it's the televised one like you said. Anything else? The one that really doesn't mean anything anymore is the Emmy, the TV award."

This segment underscores the hosts' critical stance on media and cultural recognitions, blending humor with insightful observations.

7. Honors and Records: Beyoncè and Ultra Marathon Achievements

The hosts share intriguing facts about record holders, including Beyoncè's achievement of 35 Grammys and an 80-year-old Floridian named Bob Becker who completed the Badwater Ultramarathon, one of the world's toughest foot races.

Brady Bogen (13:34):
"The record holder for most Grammys one is Beyonce."

Brady Bogen (26:55):
"There's this 80-year-old runner in Florida named Bob Becker. Just became the oldest person to compete the world's toughest foot race. The Badwater ultra Marathon. That's 135 mile run through Death Valley."

These highlights celebrate extraordinary accomplishments, reflecting themes of endurance, excellence, and cultural impact.

8. Humor and Critical Commentary on Media Portrayals

The conversation touches on nostalgic TV shows like "The Flintstones," critiquing the unrealistic portrayal of female characters such as Pebbles and Betty Rubble.

John Holmberg (16:05):
"Remember when they made Pebbles and Bam. Bam. Were traveling around in that band. Wilma still kept it together."

Their humorous take on media portrayals underscores subtle critiques of societal standards and character development in classic television.

9. Tech Mishaps and Listener Interactions

The episode features light-hearted banter about technical issues with video playback, reflecting the hosts' casual and relatable interactions with media glitches.

Larry McFeely (28:19):
"How is the system down?"

Brett Vesely (28:54):
"I mean, after last week, it's."

These moments showcase the group's camaraderie and ability to navigate unexpected challenges with humor.

10. Closing Remarks and Ongoing Banter

As the episode nears its end, Holmberg and his co-hosts engage in playful teasing and ongoing discussions about various topics, maintaining the dynamic and entertaining energy characteristic of the show.

John Holmberg (34:23):
"Smearing yogurt on the windows while Jesus watches. Man, you guys are quick with the videos now. And the AI Is awesome."

Brett Vesely (35:04):
"I'm tired of Brady's ridiculous, borderline harmful news."

This final exchange encapsulates the show's blend of humor, critique, and engaging dialogue, leaving listeners entertained and anticipating future episodes.

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Notable Quotes with Speaker Attribution and Timestamps:

• John Holmberg (03:43):
  "I for one, am offended."

• Brady Bogen (09:39):
  "Happy National Nude Day."

• John Holmberg (19:22):
  "Just call all pro shades."

• Brady Bogen (21:03):
  "Number one, Cajun."

• John Holmberg (34:23):
  "Smearing yogurt on the windows while Jesus watches."

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Conclusion

This episode of "Holmberg's Morning Sickness" showcases a blend of humor, critical discourse, and engaging conversations on current events, cultural phenomena, and quirky trends. The hosts navigate sensitive topics with a mix of sincerity and satire, offering listeners both entertainment and thoughtful commentary. Their dynamic interactions, marked by memorable quotes and lively debates, underscore the show's position as Arizona's premier morning radio affair.

Transcript

[Brett]

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[Larry McFeely]

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[John Holmberg]

Blowing through this bad boy and I fear that we are closing in on Brett's videos again which caused great turmoil on Friday.

[Brett]

I can't top those.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no. I'm not asking to top, I'm just. Well you didn't expect what happened Friday to happen so we'll see if happening the way it's happening in just oh by the iron. Okay, I'll get to that in a little bit. Yeah, big perp. Robert Lavender's email. Then another quandary again about dice versus dominoes. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know how to respond to black people emails. As a white I'm like I don't know how to play either. Are you talking about. I played tri ominos when I was a kid. That seems domino mother. I played dominoes for a while but I played with my ex wife. I don't think it had the same kind of. I don't think we were slapping cash on that. Domino's is fun. Still don't understand it but different kind of wiggling the tail ones and the triangulation ones and tri Uminos was really difficult. It was good, though.

[Brady]

Yeah, that steps it up.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it keeps you from getting the Alzheimer's, that's for sure. You got to start thinking. So I'll answer big perps questions after the show, but I can't. I mean, what's your. I mean, come on. Dice, poker or dominoes? What do you. I mean, come on, guys. What am I in the minute Nate dog video? I don't know what's going on. Am I down on 21 in Lewis shooting dice? Just the homie said, let's do this.

[Larry McFeely]

Dice isn't like craps that you throw in the alley, right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, that's what throwing dice is. Just basically, it's like craps. Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Rolling bones, you know, that's when Debo knocked. That's right. We know all of our dice from Friday and from Boys in the Hood and Boys in the Hood and regulators mount up on a mission trying to find Mr. Warren G. And that was when he was playing dice and he got all hemmed up in those. Anyway, Long. We'll get to that in a little while. Thanks. Big perp making a mess in my morning. It's time for the Brady Report. It's brought to you. Oh, now I can't say this. Oh, and by the way, before we get to this, before I get into this. Oh, WNBA all star weekend is also occurring soon. It's in Indianapolis.

[Brady]

I thought maybe it happened already.

[John Holmberg]

Nope.

[Brady]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

It's an Indianapolis. I didn't miss it coming up. No, you. You still got time. And on the billboards in Indiana on a building. I saw that. I sent it to you.

[Brett]

Oh, I know.

[John Holmberg]

They have one of the bill. You know, they decorate those sides of buildings as advertisements now. Well, they're really excited about the WNBA coming to town. And one of the buildings says can't block my shine now. I for one, am offended. I don't know why. Big purpose. And on a plane right now out there with a sign getting angry at this. That's not. That is. I mean, it is a. It's a 20 story building.

[Brady]

It is.

[John Holmberg]

You can't have that. Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

Who is that featured on that?

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. It's a WNBA player, so no one knows. But I don't know who that is. She's a player for the wnb.

[Brady]

A white player, though, right?

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Brady]

Look.

[Larry McFeely]

Okay, that would make it worse.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Because I looked at it briefly. I didn't zoom in.

[Brett]

It's not Caitlin Clark.

[John Holmberg]

No, it Is not Caitlin. But you can't have that. Is not. No marketing executive should have thumbs up that idea. I got uncomfortable. And all I was doing was watching the Indiana Fever to see if Sophie Cunningham was going to beat anyone up. And after a minute, I'm like, I can't watch this. The catastrophe of basketball. Then they showed downtown Indianapolis, and I'm like, that's Indiana. Those people aren't reading that right in Indiana. I. Trust me, I'm from there. They're not saying anything more than what we're saying. Like, somebody should take that down. Anyway, I'm standing up for the people, even though I can't tell you. Big perp. The difference between dominoes and dice. And Uno. I don't. He included Uno. I didn't even know that was a thing.

[Larry McFeely]

You know what smart is?

[John Holmberg]

I'm not a dumb man, but I know what smart is. Yeah. And the. That's not good. That's not good. And nobody said a thing. All the billboards downtown Indianapolis looking good. That one's not you. Let southern Indiana see that. They're going to feel okay with it. Terrible. So just to let you know, I'm probably the most active person in the world. I'm the best activist anybody's got. Because I know what racism is from being raised white. And I pointed out. That's a bad one. That's a bad one. Don't do that. Anyway, wnba, you've made terrible errors. Sorry. I'm talking about Big Perp. He got me. That was our African American moment. From Big Perp to you guys. That was me taking care of the community. Because I can't believe that building hasn't been burned down. Not encouraging it. I can't afford that. Fine. If it happened. I don't think anything. I think I can say that in any. But if I was a group, I'd get together and at least picket that building. The good thing is it's the WNBA so no one sees it. It's like magic ink. You can't see it. You just can't see it.

[Brady]

It's just nice of you to shine a light on that.

[John Holmberg]

Thank you very much. See, and you're. You're from Ohio, so you couldn't. You couldn't be serious about it. You had to get more racist. No spotlight. Because that's what they do in Upper Arlington. Because the help can't fight back. It's true. I'm not wrong. I've been there. I know what it's like. Laugh. Because he knows those guys in Upper Arlington that are allowed there from certain times of the day, they don't fight back. They just about it when they go home. That was in ua. I saw it. I saw your bubble. They ain't fighting back.

[Larry McFeely]

On a different note years ago.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, it's now. It's. It was. Well, I was there years ago too, but it hasn't changed. Not even a little bit.

[Larry McFeely]

No way.

[John Holmberg]

Not even a little.

[Larry McFeely]

On a different note. Texter says John, because I've listened to you for so long, I didn't notice the transition when I was heading up to a job. I'm a plumber up in Cottonwood. My radio slowly transitioned from a. From KUPD to a SE country station. And I thought it was you just messing.

[Brady]

Nope.

[Larry McFeely]

Contemplated driving my truck off the side of the road waiting for you to come in with a fart joke.

[John Holmberg]

97. 9 gets interrupted somewhere in Cottonwood by.

[Larry McFeely]

A country station apparently. Please tell your listeners to use the app if you're traveling up.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, back in the day when people cared about this frequency, we'd take over the whole state. Now you lose us in Wickenburg to.

[Larry McFeely]

Get us in Tucson, right?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you can get it all over. We used to cover the state.

[Brady]

I remember going up playing golf with Mark Malone one weekend and we all the way there.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Not anymore. We used to have to pay for like transit if imagine our old owners used to do that. They were the cheapest people on the planet. Somehow another covering Arizona like the sun. Now we don't now Wickenburg. That's it. Get on your app. That's fine. We got. We got ways to solve that. But don't listen to country music. It's detrimental. It's time for the Brady report. It's brought to you by all pro shade concepts. If you want to get some shade in your life, get that backyard covered. I did it again yesterday. Tried to make it across the back patio. No shoes, no socks, just I can do this. I can do this. And I got over there and I'm like, I can't get back. There's no getting back. I had to put my feet in the pool first.

[Brady]

Tap dance.

[John Holmberg]

I was tap dance. I tap danced all the way to the pool and then ran back, still burned up. Get some shade in that backyard. I get it from the people who do it the best. 20 years of getting this going. Two decades of quality custom installed patio shades, awnings and sunscreens. They're the best in the business for a reason. Been around for a long time doing it and now it's your turn to use them all. Prochet.com Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix.

[John Holmberg]

Hello, world. Hi.

[Brady]

Happy National Nude Day.

[John Holmberg]

Nude.

[Brady]

Nude.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Conor McGregor was just celebrating that all weekend. I see.

[Brady]

Now, National Tape Measure Day.

[John Holmberg]

Nude Day goes with that. You're going to eventually measure it. Am I wrong?

[Brady]

Alvin J. Fellows received the patent and on this day in 1860, for the.

[John Holmberg]

Tape measure.

[Brady]

And National Mac and Cheese Day.

[John Holmberg]

Well, there we go the hell out of that.

[Brett]

On Friday, he was celebrating early.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I thought that's why we went out.

[Larry McFeely]

That's why he didn't share and tell us about it.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no. We went out to bitch about our jobs. We didn't go out for Mac. And we went out to complain and see what's our next steps. We didn't go out for Mac and cheese day.

[Brady]

54% of the people in this survey eat Mac and cheese weekly.

[John Holmberg]

Congratulations, Brady. They noticed you.

[Brady]

86% of Americans say it's an adult food, not just for. And the real passion comes in. 56% say they would give up coffee or social media before giving up Mac and cheese.

[John Holmberg]

Mac and cheese is not for children. There's children's Mac and cheese. And then you graduate to what you stole from all of us on Friday, which is fantastic.

[Brett]

You know how fast you would delete Boss KUPD for Mac and cheese every day?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, by the way, Rob, Rob Wood has emailed in and said, I don't even know why that's racist. Good. I'm not gonna tell you why, because then you'll know. But I'm telling you right now, most of Indiana knows that that billboard's racist. Good for you, Rob. Don't look it up on the Internet. Stay naive to that. That's less that we have to worry about in the future. But you know what's gonna happen, Rob? One day you're gonna say it and you won't realize what you said, and you'll truly see. I didn't know that was a racist trope. You'll be in a courtroom.

[Larry McFeely]

I did not know any old movies from the 40s, 50s?

[Brett]

Oh, take off your road car glasses. Let's just say that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. Just maybe you should look into it and so you don't step into that landmine and say you're traveling to Kentucky or Ohio or Indiana. Trust me, they know what that is.

[Larry McFeely]

Another one. I can tell what race you are. Texter. I don't get it. Seriously?

[John Holmberg]

Good. Maybe. Maybe we're becoming oblivious to some slurs. But you know what? That's going to get young.

[Larry McFeely]

You think he's young?

[John Holmberg]

I hope so. Yeah. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean. I mean who talks like that?

[Larry McFeely]

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[John Holmberg]

Holg's. Morning sickness gonna get you in hot water in the wrong place.

[Larry McFeely]

Another one. Call me Brady with rose colored glasses. I don't understand it.

[John Holmberg]

You know it's making me happy to hear that. Good.

[Brett]

Yeah, I don't understand it either.

[John Holmberg]

I don't either.

[Brady]

Couple of basis fun facts.

[John Holmberg]

All three of those people that emailed are not from Indiana. Cuz Indiana. It's on your birth certificate is a. Isn't a and then it says the word.

[Brady]

The record holder for most Grammys one is Beyonce.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

With 35. The runner up is Sir George Salty. He's a Hungarian British conductor who conducted the Chicago Symphony Orchestra for 22 years. He won 31 Grammys.

[Larry McFeely]

How come Kanye doesn't defend him?

[Brett]

Those are all those non televised awards.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Grammys are everywhere.

[Brady]

An average of 350. An average of 350 slices of pizza are sold in the US every second.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Larry McFeely]

Brady's.

[John Holmberg]

You know it feels good to be seen and I feel like this. The Mac and cheese and pizza news by the way, also meaningless. The Grammys are good if it's the televised one like you said. Anything else? The one that really doesn't mean anything anymore is the Emmy, the TV award. Because it used to be that was like wow, what a great. But the same trophy exists for like local Emmys. Brad Perry's got like three.

[Brady]

News stories.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, he's the worst broadcast. Yeah, it's the girl holding with the wings. That's the same thing for the Rocky Mountain local news Emmys.

[Larry McFeely]

That diminishes the real one, doesn't it?

[John Holmberg]

Kills it. So you'll see guys like Brad Perry with Emmys behind him on a shelf. And you're like, that guy can bar talk.

[Larry McFeely]

He didn't earn those.

[John Holmberg]

He just. I think everybody gets one or two. You think the sportscaster at Channel 3 did a thing from home and he had like four of them behind him. You get an Emmy for anything. If you're on tv, you get an Emmy. Those are meaningless.

[Brady]

If you drop Silly Putty from a high place, it doesn't bounce, it shatters.

[John Holmberg]

Really.

[Brady]

And I o. You tested, Saw a guy, I looked it up and I'm like, how high does it have to be, you know, to drop it? And this kid at. He was at a university, he dropped it from the library, top of the library. 50 pound ball of silly Silly Putty. No wonder got security out there to section it off to see what happened. It shattered.

[John Holmberg]

What if it bounced? It would have killed like a hundred people.

[Larry McFeely]

I know.

[John Holmberg]

Boom. Yeah. It's just slaughtering people on its drive back down the road. I'm glad it shatters, but now I want to know, I want to do it. How high do you have to get?

[Brady]

That was probably a 50 foot drop, maybe.

[John Holmberg]

So if I just got on the.

[Brady]

Roof 10 stories initially in the story.

[John Holmberg]

And then that's a hundred feet.

[Brady]

Yeah, that was a hundred foot drop.

[John Holmberg]

But that's a big one. Well, now I want to try that.

[Brady]

Pebbles from the Flintstones Hot. Was originally going to be a boy. Until the company told the creators of the show, baby girl dolls sold a lot better.

[John Holmberg]

Remember when they made Pebbles and Bam. Bam. When they were like young adults? They drew. They drew. You want to talk about an unrealistic body shape? Pebbles was ridiculous. I mean, her mom was no, like, Wilma had a. Now that I'm older, I look at Wilma, different woman.

[Brady]

Betty were pretty solid.

[John Holmberg]

Betty was good, but Betty was taking some Barney crank. So I had no respect for her. Wilma had a man. I mean, if, you know, remember Dom, who used to work here, who was built just like Barney Rubble? You'd look at the woman that chose him differently, wouldn't you?

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Like if a woman came rolling in and she was about 6:1. And then Dom go, hey, hey, hey, how you doing? Like, how'd you. What'd you do here? And you just realized, oh, she's damaged. You don't have respect for that. Something's wrong with her.

[Brett]

Well, the tail he's pulling with that Corey Taylor face on his leg, he's.

[John Holmberg]

Got a tattoo of the guy from Slipknot on his body. No, Betty Rubble is gonna roll into his life. Unless she's a complete mess.

[Brett]

But that Jamie Josta on the other one.

[John Holmberg]

Good.

[Brett]

I think he's got both.

[John Holmberg]

God. But Pebbles. They drew Pebbles as a 19 year old and turned Bam. Bam. Were traveling around in that band. Wilma still kept it together. Wilma had a baby and kept it tight. What excuse the ladies have if Wilma can keep a 2 inch waist pushed out Pebbles. And Betty too. She gave birth to that super strong kid.

[Brady]

Researchers tested people's hair to see how much of the stress hormone cortisol they'd been producing. The ones who said Mondays. As far as the days of the week the most stressful.

[John Holmberg]

What they're.

[Brady]

They were testing people's hair to see what day produced the most cortisol.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Brady]

And Monday ends up being the most stressed out. It's stress hormone.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

23 more cortisol coursing through their veins.

[John Holmberg]

On Mondays.

[Brady]

On Mondays. And it even included people that were retired. And they're saying that's probably because while they are working going through the Mondays it still continues on even in retirement. You're just conditioned that way after.

[John Holmberg]

So Mondays are just almost a Pavlovian kind of. Ugh. Here we go. No matter what you got going on it's a reset button.

[Brady]

A researcher in the UK has found a way to keep your home more than 6 degrees cooler. This hack. You ready for this? Covering your window with yogurt.

[John Holmberg]

Not gonna happen. Your house would smell so bad.

[Brady]

The yogurt forms a film on the window and they an example they have the yogurt looks like plain yogurt paintbrush. And you paint on the outside of the window doesn't attract flies. I guess it's dries up in like 30 minutes. So then it creates this film that.

[Brett]

Blocks you're an if you do that.

[John Holmberg]

I agree. Just call all pro shades. Yeah. And shade up your windows tent.

[Brady]

It doesn't smell.

[John Holmberg]

Oh yeah. You're. You're the neighborhood. It has to smell. Isn't it a lot of dairy.

[Brett]

Just bring out some yoplay and a spoon and just start slapping it on the window.

[John Holmberg]

Or what?

[Brady]

That's what they're saying. Come on.

[John Holmberg]

That's not what they're saying. It has to be like something other than that kind of yogurt. You can't just go get mixed berries.

[Brady]

I just used a supermarket brand of Greek yogurt plain that has a fat percentage of about 10%.

[Brett]

So you got the great value out there.

[John Holmberg]

And yeah. So yeah.

[Brady]

They're assuming it was plain.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah. Because yo play Isn't that just the.

[Brady]

Random chunks of strawberries or something, you know, on there?

[John Holmberg]

It's that. It's the Cam Newton, Oiko stuff that just. That paste. Yep.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Don't worry about the bugs and everything that'll be crawling all over your house.

[Brady]

That's what they're saying. It doesn't.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's because they use fat free. Nothing in it once. Not the yogurt that people eat and think they're being healthy, but it's sugary and it's basically melted ice cream.

[Brady]

Most people probably wouldn't consider yogurt cheap, but they're saying you only need about a tablespoon per window.

[John Holmberg]

What if the window is huge?

[Brady]

That doesn't size the window.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That doesn't add up at all.

[Brady]

2.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's the point. A tablespoon after the fact. Yeah. What size of window is a tablespoon? Because I've got a huge window. Wouldn't cover a third of that thing.

[Brady]

You're gonna need two tablespoons, I think. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You've done the math.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Thanks. Thanks. Neil Degrasse Jackass.

[Brady]

There's a new list of the most loved regional accents across America.

[Larry McFeely]

None of them.

[Brett]

There we go.

[Brady]

Number one, Cajun.

[John Holmberg]

Huh.

[Brady]

And I don't understand. The number two was Long island accent.

[John Holmberg]

Long Island, Long Island. That's the worst.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Number three, the Mississippi accent.

[John Holmberg]

That was Larry's ex wife. It was Long Island. That was rough. All right. My dad dated that lady that got that bad haircut and he told her they didn't think it looked good. Your father says it looked like retard. We've all said it about your accent, so you might as well match it with a haircut.

[Brady]

And now I've got some smugglers news.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, all right. And does he.

[Brady]

Stories about people getting caught with contraband, getting busted. We call it the smuggler's News. There's a 63 year old guy from Texas facing charges after he stole a boat in Key West.

[John Holmberg]

Stole or sold?

[Brady]

He stole it and took it all the way to Cuba.

[John Holmberg]

Somebody went back.

[Brady]

Floyd de Vassiere is his name. He's 38 years old and he was out on a date with a lady. So it looked that way and rented the boat.

[John Holmberg]

What do you mean it looked that way? That way.

[Brady]

It's like I'm take. I'm gonna. He's gonna rent the boat and take her out for a little boat 20.

[John Holmberg]

Thought he rented the boat. Yeah, he just stole it. Got it.

[Brady]

Well, he rented it, he paid for it. 26 foot.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady]

Fishing boat. But you're not supposed to take it to Cuba.

[John Holmberg]

Right? He just overshot his rental agreement.

[Brady]

Yeah. So the GPS tracker all of a sudden figured out he was about 30 miles south of Key West. They called the Cuba Coast Guard. They scooped him up just before he got.

[John Holmberg]

How close was. He? Thought Cuba and Florida were 90 miles apart.

[Brady]

90 miles? Yeah. So he was pretty. He was within 30 miles.

[John Holmberg]

That's an overreaction.

[Brady]

They thought so. Maybe he was lost.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And then didn't realize, you know, how much farther.

[John Holmberg]

But all the cocaine.

[Brady]

Well, they found out he did the same thing in 2019.

[John Holmberg]

He's trying to break.

[Brady]

Made it all the way over there, smuggled some drugs and drove him back. Rode him back.

[John Holmberg]

Was his name Tom Bogan by chance?

[Brady]

There's a picture of Floyd.

[John Holmberg]

Hey. Hey. So the girl on a date with him was like, where are we going? Just pipe down. There's so many Cubans going the other way.

[Brady]

I love this trip.

[John Holmberg]

What are we doing? Did you see that man on that. On that tire? I did. You're gonna see a bunch of that. Just keep. Just keep your eyes forward. There's. There's a woman floating on a cardboard butt. Shut up. Hear the words you say sometimes. I mean, who talks like that? 98 PD.

[Larry McFeely]

There's no better time to gear up than right now at your Valley Toyota dealer. This is Larry McFeely. And whether you're blazing trails in a legendary 4Runner, hauling toys to the lake in the beastly tundra, or crawling through canyons in the unstoppable Tacoma, your Toyota was built for Arizon. That's why keeping your Toyota in peak condition is a must. Trust Toyota certified technicians to service your ride using genuine Toyota parts made to handle everything the desert throws your way. Adventure starts with confidence, and confidence starts with service you can trust. Visit your Valley toyota dealer or valleytoyotadealers.com toyota. Let's go places.

[John Holmberg]

Holmberg's morning sickness. Look, I know it's a bogan. It looks like Tom.

[Brady]

Why do we need four empty coolers?

[John Holmberg]

Just, you know what? Are you enjoying the date or not? I rented the goddamn boat for you. Please help us. These people need help. No, they don't. You're going the wrong way.

[Brady]

An LA county deputy pleads guilty to smuggling heroin. A pound of heroin and a can of Pringles.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Larry McFeely]

But you can't eat just one. Damn.

It's the wrong one.

[John Holmberg]

Well, not.

[Brady]

And finally, a prisoner in France escaped from the Lyon Carbos prison.

[John Holmberg]

Did you just Confuse chips a hoy with Pringles.

[Larry McFeely]

No, I thought that was Lays. You can't eat. Just bet you can't eat just one.

[John Holmberg]

I'll bet you can't bite a chip. Bet you bite a chip.

[Larry McFeely]

Oh, that's the one.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah. Either way, get it straight before you open your trap.

[Brady]

So this dude escaped because his fellow inmate was getting released. And he put him in a laundry bag and the guy carried him over shore.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Brady]

And walked out of the prison.

[John Holmberg]

That's a strong friend to know.

[Brady]

A little bit easier to do because the prison right now has 1200 people incarcerated. The capacity is 678. So there's a lot going on there at the end. You think they don't have time to look for the details of people.

[John Holmberg]

They're looking to lighten the load a little bit. If you want to. If you want to tote your buddy out. Cool. It's one less mouth to feed. Is it a Mormon prison? There's too many of them in there. You got a lot going on.

[Brady]

That's your smugglers, dude.

[John Holmberg]

We overshot capacity by quadruple. But a few of these dudes in bags bag them up. Technically he's wearing clothes that's kind of laundry. Get him out of here.

[Brady]

And the guy that was smuggled out was in for still waiting his final deal. But he was involved with organized crime. Oh, the Frog Kuza.

[John Holmberg]

The Frog Cuza.

[Brady]

Yeah, that's what I was calling it. The mafia. The French mafia.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you're making a joke.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Come on, man.

[Brett]

Crash and burn.

[John Holmberg]

I'll have. This is why Mondays cause so much stress.

[Brady]

The Frog of Nostra.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no.

[Brady]

There's this 80 year old runner in Florida named Bob Becker. Just became the oldest person to compete the world's toughest foot race. The Badwater ultra Marathon. That's 135 mile run through Death Valley.

[John Holmberg]

Yes.

[Brady]

80 years old. You have 48 hours to do it. And he finished with three hours to spare.

[John Holmberg]

And they finished that thing on top of the mountain that looks down on Death Valley. What?

[Brady]

Brutal. And they talk about how shoes melt.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. If it's the right day, your shoes will literally melt to the pavement. They did a thing on Aerial America about the Death Valley and they talk about that race and it's. These people are insane and none of them look healthy. All the training and things they do to run in this, they just turn into these like emaciated stick people that can run forever. But they look awful. What's the point of doing all that exercising if in the end, you look terrible. The whole point is to look better, isn't it? But they get addicted. That adrenaline. When I was doing marathons, I'm not a runner. I meet the people who loved it. They'd run, like, nine miles a day. Get up first thing. All they want to do is run. They're like dogs with tennis balls. None of them look good. Like, moderate runners all look good. When they go over that next step, it's like they're on method.

[Larry McFeely]

We got nothing because they. The system is down.

[John Holmberg]

How is the system down?

[Larry McFeely]

I don't know, but I had to reset it.

[Brett]

So Cambodia. We'll get it handled.

[John Holmberg]

We have somebody.

[Larry McFeely]

He's here, by the way.

[John Holmberg]

So who has to travel back to watch?

[Brett]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

There you go.

[Larry McFeely]

Well, we'll see if this part of it. Now I got to reset it. Nope, Still. Still not working.

[John Holmberg]

Try yours, Brett. All right. I bet you Brett's works.

[Larry McFeely]

Brett probably does. But mine is not working.

[John Holmberg]

And look at him go. Maybe. I don't know. It's got access.

[Larry McFeely]

Well, it's there.

[John Holmberg]

Wait on the videos.

[Larry McFeely]

The computers aren't seeing it.

[John Holmberg]

Brett's are working. All right, we'll cut right to Brett's then. Bracelet.

[Brett]

I mean, after last week, it's.

[John Holmberg]

Well, don't. Don't come. Every day's a new day.

[Larry McFeely]

We're all always going to be disappointed.

[John Holmberg]

By the way, Clyde makes a good point. And it hit me, and I didn't really follow up on it, but Cuba has a coast guard. They're doing a terrible job.

[Brady]

They have one boat.

[John Holmberg]

They caught the one guy trying to break in, but they're letting everything else.

[Brady]

We had to call it in.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it was our guy. Oh, geez. All right, hold on. Brett just caught my attention. His is.

[Brett]

You're not seeing much there.

[John Holmberg]

You're not gonna. What was that girl dancing around? She looks good. There's no sound. Yeah, she's got a little black skirt on. Oh, Jesus Christ. What's wrong with her face? Is that a fella? It's a guy. She's got a great ass.

[Brett]

Person.

[John Holmberg]

It's not you. No, not me. Oh, my God. What an ass. In that skirt. Until the man's face showed up later, nothing at all. Well, that would have fooled me for a long time. Oh, dude. Fighting a dog in a. In a street. Is that dog chained? Oh, he takes a swing at the dog, and the dog catches his hand, bites his hand off. Oh, I love. Yeah, they show the wound, and the dog won block that, too. Look at that. Oh, he tried to. He tried to take a swing in the dog. Just. Oh, that's awesome. Blood is pouring out of him. Good piece of garbage. Oh, I hope that guy gets hit by a truck on the way home too. Cuba has a coast guard.

[Brett]

Here you go.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, all right. Here's a. Here's the. They. He. She.

[Larry McFeely]

What the.

[John Holmberg]

It's a man with a beard. It looks like Matthew Stafford of the LA Rams masturbating with his vagina. That's. That's an optical illusion. Yeah, he's sitting on. I hope maybe not. The legs are kind of fuzzy too. What are we looking at there?

[Larry McFeely]

Something's kind of weird.

[John Holmberg]

Start that over, Brett. Yeah, that's him. He licks his fingers and goes back to the lady on his. But going through all the treatments but hasn't gotten the penis put on. That's what. That's what you don't realize. When they go halfway, if you're gonna do that operation, get the full shebang.

[Brett]

Well, you and Toledo used to box.

[John Holmberg]

You'll appreciate it. No boxing. There's a lady with her legs. Oh, she's naked with her legs spread open in some sort of contraption. And another girl is speed bagging her vagina. She's naked too. Oh, each punch. Oh, man, she's just shoe shining that thing. Oh, she's throwing a four punch. Four punch combo. I mean, they're girl punches, but still. Girl punches to the vagina are no fun. Oh, now she's got the overhead cam with the sky cam. After the first round, we go over to our scorekeeper to Harold Letterman. What'd you think? Okay, Jim, that girl's vagina took a real beating. I had a 10 to 9 in that round. It would have gone 10, 8 had she not gotten up from that last knockdown.

[Brett]

I. I got nothing with this one.

[John Holmberg]

All right. This is some naked lady. Don't know if I'm being wise. That's a naked man. I'm sorry. And he's got a weird turkey. Like a homemade doll. Homemade inflatable doll of some.

[Brett]

The nacho libre mask on or the Mexican wrestler thing.

[John Holmberg]

I've never seen this actually before. He's switching positions with the inflatable doll. A little pink wig on her. I've never seen anybody do this with an inflatable doll. Oh, just wait. He's not done yet. Oh, he's getting her mouth involved. That thing actually kind of convinced. Convinced me to buy one. That's kind of impressive. A whole lot more useful than I thought it would have been. Wow. That's.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Unattractive, by the way.

[Brett]

And then watching a friend's house. And here's fun with Grandma probably.

[John Holmberg]

What happened? Oh, fun with. Oh, Grandma's got the vibrator and she's with a young, early 20s. That's a. This is a quinceanera gone horribly wrong.

[Brady]

That's A.I.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's not. Oh, that one's hard. Oh, God. Granny is helping this granddaughter aged friend, and they look very much alike. I'm nervous that there's a DNA similarity here. Now Grandma's working the vibrator. Make it stop. Oh, no. Oh, we don't get to see it finish.

[Brett]

No, no, no, no.

[John Holmberg]

We're crying out loud.

[Brett]

I told you I was like, today compared to. I mean, there's no topping Fridays.

[John Holmberg]

Oh. Oh, God. Brett, why.

[Larry McFeely]

93?

[John Holmberg]

Unbelievable.

[Brett]

I tuned into them this weekend. I didn't hear that drop for some reason.

[John Holmberg]

Got to get that together.

[Larry McFeely]

I forgot to get it to Thriller.

[John Holmberg]

Get us the other ones. AC93. 3.

[Brady]

He still hates it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you're just gonna get in trouble for that. We're gonna hear about this picture in my mind. Don't worry about it.

[Brett]

It for Brady's yogurt.

[John Holmberg]

Smearing yogurt on the windows while Jesus watches. Man, you guys are quick with the videos now. And the AI Is awesome. Who are the girls with him? I don't know. Brady just making the yogurt gals.

[Brady]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Porkopolis.

[Brett]

Are those Hooter girls or something?

[John Holmberg]

Or yogurt all over his face. God, I hope that's yogurt on your face. Anyway, if you want your house six degrees cooler than it was yesterday, Brady's suggests Oikos.

[Brady]

Oikos? The window.

[John Holmberg]

Just get them tinted. Yeah, I mean, it's cheaper. Yes, but you've got yogurt all over your windows that has to look horrible. It's bad enough when you've got, like, mist on your windows.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's like Christmas in July.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Anyway, yeah, I'll slather yogurt all over my windows. And hey, maybe I'll put peppermint pavers down and we'll all just live happily ever after in Candyland. I'm tired of Brady's ridiculous, borderline harmful news.

[John Holmberg]

I'm with you. The most shocking thing we heard today is Cuba has a coast guard. When? Cuba coast guard picked him up. What? That guy? Hey. Hi. I'm Cuban coast guard. Apparently the guy's name there's the Cuban coast guard. It's three dudes in a rowboat.

[Brady]

Took him a while to get there.

[John Holmberg]

I think the Cuban coast guard was Ernest Hemingway for a while. Just out there wrestling sharks. Anyway, there goes your Brady report. Everybody, it's 98. It's out of control now, 98.