07-24-25 - BR - THU - Basketball Rules Are Different In North Korea - 25yo FLA Man Goes Crazy Strips Naked At Planet Fitness When They Close

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode Date: July 24, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Station: 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio

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1. Fundraising for Water Bottles

The episode kicks off with a passionate discussion about the ongoing fundraising campaign to collect one million bottles of water. John Holmberg emphasizes the urgency and community effort required to reach this ambitious goal.

• John Holmberg [02:08]: "We were way ahead of schedule... We are at 880,000 bottles of water now."
• Brett [02:41]: "It's hot out here."

Holmberg highlights the success achieved so far, mentioning significant milestones and generous contributions from local businesses and listeners. The team fervently encourages more donations, aiming to alleviate the pressing need.

• John Holmberg [02:42]: "We can get to a million today. If you get to a million bottles today, it's over."

Acknowledging the support from sponsors like Lerner, Row, Amco, Safeway, and Albertsons, Brett shares updates on recent donations and the impact they're making.

• Brett [03:24]: "We've got 200 bucks that I'll be bringing in tomorrow to buy some more water."

2. Local Events and Sponsors

The hosts discuss their recent participation in a local home show, praising various exhibitors and sponsors. John shares his positive experiences with All Pro Shade, a significant sponsor, and how they plan to enhance his home's outdoor space.

• John Holmberg [06:17]: "All Pro Shade will take care of you. I've got a spot in my front yard that looks pretty but man oh man, that sun hits it wrong."

Brady promotes the sponsors, highlighting their contributions and services, reinforcing the community-driven spirit of the show.

3. WNBA and North Korean Basketball Rules Discussion

A humorous and critical comparison between North Korean basketball rules and the current WNBA regulations takes center stage. The hosts riff on the absurdity of North Korean-style scoring systems and apply them to the WNBA, sparking lively debates.

• Brady [10:34]: "Basketball in North Korea has different rules. Slam dunks are worth three points."
• John Holmberg [11:02]: "I like North Korea's rules. I really do."

They delve into potential rule changes, like awarding points for blocked shots and penalizing airballs, blending satire with genuine critique of sporting regulations.

• Brady [11:17]: "If you shoot an airball, free throw. You're killed."
• John Holmberg [11:20]: "A blocked shot should be a point for the defense."

4. Overrated Food Culture Poll

The hosts reveal results from a recent poll about overrated food cultures, sparking a spirited conversation about global cuisines. France tops the list, much to the hosts' amusement and disagreement.

• John Holmberg [13:09]: "The French."
• Brady [13:15]: "They knock out the bread pretty good, but other than that, it's butter. That's all it is."

They continue to dissect opinions on American, British, Italian, Japanese, and Mexican cuisines, offering their own perspectives and challenging each other’s viewpoints.

5. Reddit Stories

Engaging narratives from listeners’ Reddit posts are shared, bringing relatable and humorous real-life scenarios to the forefront.

• Babysitting Incident: A story about a babysitter who ordered DoorDash for hungry kids, leading to parental frustration.

• Illegal Fishing: Brett recounts the tale of Garrett Morrison, a 20-year-old caught illegally fishing Chinook salmon in Oregon. The humorous yet cautionary tale includes Morrison’s cheeky attire and blatant disregard for fishing regulations.

  • John Holmberg [17:03]: "He's a fisherman. He's Brady the fisherman."

• Henry Alvarado's "Henry Frenzy": A Florida man’s extreme reaction to a gym closing shutters the morning’s entertainment, leading to a mix of concern and amusement among the hosts.

  • Brett [19:22]: "He stripped off his clothing, ran naked through the gym..."
  • John Holmberg [18:54]: "Henry frenzy."

6. US Consumer Product Safety Commission Pool Recall

The show addresses a significant recall by the US Consumer Product Safety Commission of approximately five million above-ground pools. The recall stems from safety hazards linked to drowning incidents among children.

• Brady [20:12]: "They concluded that they were connected with the drowning deaths of nine children."
• John Holmberg [20:26]: "Remember when they used to have... filters that were getting stronger and stronger in your pools?"

The hosts discuss the implications for families, especially in Arizona, and share personal anecdotes related to pool safety and maintenance.

7. Bull Fighting Video Commentary

A segment featuring a humorous and chaotic video of "Mexican poker" bull fighting captures the hosts' attention. They provide a running commentary, highlighting the absurdity and lack of safety in the depicted event.

• John Holmberg [25:00]: "They are all volunteering for a bull. You can't be surprised when the bull comes out..."
• Brett [29:03]: "Get my ass too."

The discussion evolves into a satirical take on the sport, comparing it to inept strategies in sports leagues and emphasizing the need for safety measures.

8. Upcoming Guest: Billy Gardell

As the episode nears its conclusion, John Holmberg builds excitement for an upcoming appearance by comedian Billy Gardell. Praising Gardell’s comedic prowess and personal admiration, Holmberg teases the audience about the forthcoming segment.

• John Holmberg [32:07]: "Billy Gardell is coming. One of my favorite comedians of all time."
• Brady [32:13]: "He's here."

Listeners are left anticipating Gardell’s participation, promising more laughs and engaging content in future episodes.

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Notable Quotes

• John Holmberg [02:42]: "We can get to a million today. If you get to a million bottles today, it's over."
• Brady [10:34]: "Basketball in North Korea has different rules. Slam dunks are worth three points."
• John Holmberg [13:09]: "The French."
• John Holmberg [18:54]: "Henry frenzy."
• John Holmberg [25:00]: "They are all volunteering for a bull. You can't be surprised when the bull comes out..."

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Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully blends community engagement, humor, and topical discussions. From an earnest fundraising drive to lighthearted banter on sports and food, the show maintains its signature entertaining and sometimes provocative style. Listeners are kept informed about local initiatives, safety concerns, and amusing anecdotes, all while anticipating future guests and events.

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For more updates and to catch future episodes, tune in to 98 KUPD weekdays from 5:30 AM to 10 AM or visit www.98kupd.com.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought.

[Brett]

To you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[E]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Eastsiders the Tempe Improv has two very funny guys in Mike Vecchione and comedian CP Downtown at Stand Up Live, you've got the always entertaining John Dela Cruz, AKA Nurse John. And up north at Desert Ridge features comedy vet and friend of the show, Steve Byrne. For the complete live and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com planning.

[F]

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[Brady]

You thought that was funny?

[John Holmberg]

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you, P.T. ah, Vaseline. For all you Bococks guys out there. That's the product they're using and we highly recommend you. Don't just listen to the song. Don't inject it into your genitals, please. Evidently it's turned into a problem. Brett's out there this morning. It's Signal Butte and Warner. He's standing at the Safeway Operation Hydration. And we gave you the number earlier. We were at 500,000 counted bottles about three weeks ago. Got that news last Thursday. We were all just thrilled beyond belief. 500,000 bottles on our goal of a million in the middle of July. We were way ahead of schedule. Talked to Jason yesterday from Phoenix Rescue Mission at the baseball game with us. We are at 880,000 bottles of water now. They keep counting and they got a donation from some people and they dropped off cash and they went out and bought. Brett, are you there? It doesn't mean you can coast, my man. It does not mean you can coast. No.

[Brett]

It's hot out here.

[John Holmberg]

We can get to a million today. If you get to a million bottles today, it's over. Nice. You get me 119,000 bottles of water today and Brett doesn't have to go in the van anymore. How about that?

[Brett]

That's.

[John Holmberg]

I love it. All right, start selling, baby. What do you got?

[Brett]

All right, obviously the book of 100% that we have in studio is completely wrong.

[John Holmberg]

Yep.

[Brett]

I'm actually out here on Signal Butte and around Warner.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett]

On the north west corner. So don't. Don't go to baseline because I'm not there. But I finally made it out. Here we are at Safeway collecting those waters, trying to get to that million so I don't have to come back out here, do this again.

[Brady]

So.

[Brett]

But come on by. It is a little light so far today.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brett]

It always starts out a little bit light, probably because everybody's at baseline.

[John Holmberg]

But.

[Brett]

But, yeah, we are on Warner, but yeah, we're out here taking those water donations, trying to get to the million. And again, like we always say, don't got time to shop. It's not a big deal. Just swing by, drop off some cash, drop off that envelope. I'll go do some shopping for you. And let's just knock this thing silly. Of course, we gotta, you know, thank our friends over at Lerner and Row. And of course Amco, They're. They're big sponsors along with obviously Safeway and Albertsons. And my wife just called me some local legends. She had somebody stop by. Big Mikey Roberts from Rommel Construction just dropped off two bills. So we got 200 bucks that I'll be bringing in tomorrow to buy some more water. So thank you, Big Mikey, and thank you, local legends. And come on out here. We're gonna be hanging out here till just about 9 o'. Clock. Water donations, we need it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And I just caught myself. I said it was Jason, but it was Sean from Phoenix Rescue Mission. I talked about 6,000 people yesterday, so I just scrambled names, but there's multiple Sean's here. There was a few Sean's, there was two Jason's, there was Wayne from Amco and Wang from Amco. Is there? Yeah, it was great. But yeah, it was not Jason. It was Sean who I was talking to. But yeah, he's.

[Brett]

I like Sean's numbers better than Heather's numbers.

[John Holmberg]

You know, there's no.

[Brett]

Well, he's telling us 500,000. And, you know, come on.

[John Holmberg]

Well, again, it was Sean as a man, and Heather is a woman. So she only has two thirds of the numbers that a man can get. That's. It's like a paycheck. Like a paycheck, Brett. You're only getting, like, 70% of the divide. That's pretty awesome. And actually matches up percentage wise. And she came up with about 74% of what we're getting. And then a man came in and said, here's what we've really earned. And it was pretty awesome. So thank you, Sean. Thanks. Phoenix rescue mission, and thanks to Brett. Safeway, Signal Butte, and Warner is where he is. Get out there, drop some stuff off an envelope, whatever else. We'll talk to you in a little bit. I just.

[Brett]

I just got 100 bucks right now.

[Brady]

And there we go.

[John Holmberg]

Other hit right there.

[Brett]

Jason Herrera from Cardinal Plumbing. So thank you, Jake.

[John Holmberg]

100 bucks goes right in. Go. Brett will do the shop. And nice job, kid. All right, we'll talk to you in a bit. All right. How about that? Look at that.

[Brady]

The other Sean you finally met was from Desert Coatings az.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And you found out that they glaze pavers. I just recently did my garage.

[John Holmberg]

I need my garage done. But they glaze pavers, and my pool is pavers.

[Brady]

Oh, and you saw a picture.

[John Holmberg]

I'm like, I gotta get on that. All right. We get a lot to do, Brady. We had a big day yesterday, and we were making deals, and I'm. I'm throwing money. Like, I'll do that. I want one of those. Come in my drive.

[Brady]

It's like. It was like a home show there yesterday.

[John Holmberg]

No, everything. You had real estate. You had the awnings, you had the shade. All pro shades out there.

[Brady]

Get your body in action.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. All the guys from Gate Day, Men's Health were there. It was awesome. Mo Money Pond to decorate the inside of the house. I just got from Doug Hopkins. Go outside, get the pavers in the driveway. Done by Diamond. Oh, it was great. It was a lot of fun.

[Brady]

Shade.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, we got it all pro. Shade. And actually talk to them about some stuff. I'm basically rebuilding the house after yesterday. A lot of day drinking, though. Ends up getting you later. I conked out on the couch about eight body said, you're done today, son, and put me down. I'm fine, though.

[Brady]

Game was a little disappointing.

[John Holmberg]

Well, if you're a Diamondbacks fan, you just realized one thing. You're a seller. So it's time to start selling product. We'll talk about that with Dale in a little bit. Dale's here this time. Let's get right to the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our friends at All Pro Shade. Talk to them yesterday. Thanks for hanging out with us at the Diamondbacks game and found out that they can come up with things that extend off of a patio that currently exists because I've got one that's a steel and it's like lattice. And I'm like, I don't know how to put a shade over that and make it work. Dude had three ideas right away. We'll tie right into the steel parts.

[Brady]

I'm like, oh yeah, go above.

[John Holmberg]

It was awesome. So he just, he rolled out three or four different ideas. I'm like, you're coming to the house. We're taking a look. All Pro Shade will take care of you. I've got a spot in my front yard that looks pretty but man oh man, that sun hits it wrong. It is just deadly hot and I need to get that shaded. I just can't come up with a beautiful plan. They'll do it for me. I'll pro shade. I'll take care of that. Best in the business for a reason. Really good guys to talking with them yesterday. They're just nice people. That's a good, that's a, that's a bonus. You're dealing with business people who are actually really nice. All pro shade.com that's where you go. Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Thursday morning to you Phoenix. Hello world.

[John Holmberg]

Hi.

[Brady]

Happy National Drive Thru Day and National Tequila Day.

[John Holmberg]

Too bad you can't combo that almost. Yeah. There's a drive through total wine you.

[Brady]

Can order and they'll pick it up.

[John Holmberg]

That's curbside a drive through tequila.

[Brady]

You don't want to and you don't want to drive through a total wine. It's a mess.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's illegal.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I think you're going to go to jail.

[Brady]

A lot of things called domestic terror get arrested.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you're going to definitely have trouble. They used to have that place in Mesa you could drive through and get drinks as a drive through liquor and they would pour you like a weird blueberry margarita. We found that out when we were underage and they'd, they'd serve you pull up IDs fake or otherwise. Just show them something and you get one of these blueberry tequila drinks.

[Brady]

Got a couple of basis fun facts. Guess created and sold the first pair of acid wash jeans in 1981.

[John Holmberg]

Guess.

[Brady]

They were hot.

[John Holmberg]

They were.

[Brady]

Well, guess Jeans were popular for.

[John Holmberg]

Boy, were they. They'd pull way up to the lower chest of a woman, and the seam would go right up the crack of their butts and. Or guess. Bongo was the other one I couldn't get enough of in high school. Chicks rolling around in bongo shorts for that triangle.

[Jason]

Guess.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. There was a girl named Crystal. That hat. She was tall. I think she had scoliosis because she had this weird kind of. She looked like Kristen Stewart, now that I think about it. But she had to.

[Jason]

What, Transitioned?

[Brady]

Or did she transition?

[John Holmberg]

Who transitioned? Kristen Stewart. No, she didn't. She's got short hair, that's all. Jesus Christ. Alito doesn't mean she's transitioned. These libs, they just want to make everybody the opposite. Cut your hair, he automatically starts parading you around in the LGBTQ community, which she is. Anyway. Ignore him. I was telling us. Where did he come from? Anyways, Crystal would walk around school, and she had this arch back, but it kind of was hot. Her scoliosis worked for her is what I'm saying.

[Brady]

Every now and then, it would throws.

[John Holmberg]

Those bongo shorts on. Oh, it made her ass stick out because her spine was like an upside down question mark. Oh, my God, she was great. She looked like bad punctuation and jeans.

[Brady]

Curvy all around.

[John Holmberg]

It was delicious. She curved like no other girl. I mean, it went full sideways. See? Came to look like a. Looked like a sickle. Her back. Oh. But her ass would pop out because her spine was so screwed up. And those bongo jeans did her all the favors.

[Brady]

Bongo Play Doh was originally created in the 1930s as a wallpaper cleaner and delicious treat for kids.

[John Holmberg]

I used to eat it, too.

[Brady]

Basketball in North Korea has different rules. Slam dunks are worth three points.

[John Holmberg]

Well, they're Korean. Good luck getting one of those shots.

[Brady]

In the final three minutes are worth eight points.

[John Holmberg]

They should do that for the wnba.

[Brady]

And if it's all net, three pointers are worth four points.

[John Holmberg]

Man, the WNBA keeps acting like they're North Korean citizens. They're all oppressed and stuff. Give them a couple extra bonus shots for Duncan. And those statisticians are overworked, though, in North Korea. Yeah.

[Jason]

How do you mean? Got to take. Keep track of all the extra stuff.

[Brady]

They're not easy. Come on.

[John Holmberg]

They get one a game. No, they're not.

[Brady]

In the last three minutes. You can. You can handle that. The other one. This is a pretty good rule. If you shoot an airball.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Free throw.

[John Holmberg]

You're killed.

[Brady]

They deduct A point.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's not a bad idea. I think a blocked shot should be. I've always said that in basketball. Block shot should be a point for the defense. You block a shot cleanly. The only problem is referees start making that gray area calling whether it was a hack or a block, and they.

[Brady]

At least they went to the goaltending part.

[John Holmberg]

Goaltending's legitimate rule, though. Like, that's got block. Yeah, you can look at goaltending now, especially because you can review it. You can see when it's on its way down and all that, or if it's over the rim. But Holmberg's morning sickness, that's a. I like North. North Korea's. I never thought I'd say this. I like North Korea's rules. I really do.

[Brady]

It's almost like those people are onto something. It's like papa shot in the last 30 seconds. You got the juices up.

[Jason]

Oh, if you get the flow going, forget it.

[John Holmberg]

North Korea, wnba, same thing. A bunch of loudmouths who are getting oppressed by a better version of themselves and they want to scream and yell, we don't get enough. You know, three points for a dunk, eight points for a three pointer. That's huge. How many air balls there would be. They tried that four point shot in the WNBA All Star game Saturday, and those chicks were standing on those circles and with all their might, huck it at the. And not even close. The only one that could have done it is Caitlin Clark. They hate her and she wasn't playing. But Angel Reese stepped onto one kind of arrogant. The girl stepped away like, you're not hitting this. It was the best defense I've ever seen in the wnba, which was like, dismiss that. And then she chucked one up that was about three feet short and to the right. And the audience didn't laugh because they're still pretending it's got validity.

[Brady]

A new poll asks people which country has the most overrated food culture. Not saying that the food is bad, just maybe it's too hyped.

[John Holmberg]

The French.

[Brady]

There, you nailed it. 30% of the people say France because there's not.

[John Holmberg]

French food is gross.

[Brady]

21% said America.

[John Holmberg]

They knock out the bread pretty good, but other than that, it's butter. That's all it is.

[Brady]

15% said the UK. I'm like, is British food really been hyped? I haven't. Other than fish and chips.

[Jason]

Right, right. Curry bubble and squeak or whatever you call it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but that's leftover. Yeah, that's leftover. Fish curry is. Is Indian, isn't it?

[Jason]

No, it's huge in the uk but it is Southeast Asia because it's Indian. Like Thai has a lot of curries too.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but that's not a British. It's there a lot, but.

[Jason]

Well, they eat it because those people are living.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Those people are. It's a phrase we avoid. Who are you today? Why don't you back up? Why don't you take a lap Talking about certain. I know you've done enough. That's enough, that's enough.

[Brady]

14 said Italy, another 14 said Japan, and then 7% said Mexico.

[John Holmberg]

Hard to overrate Mexican food because it's so consistently good. And Mexican food is the best type of food. I'm off of it. I won't do it. Only because that's American mix that like we did. Yeah, because it's like I was going to say, outside of Javier's, there's no like high end Mexican. God, that's a tough phrase to say out loud. There's no high end Mexican food. No, I know, but you were wrong. I fixed it. You. You dug your heels into that. Terrible. Those people come. When I'm talking about Mexicans, I mean, there's no like, place that's like, oh, that's the incredible. Javier's is like they took wagyu meat and put it in the taquitos and it still tastes like taquitos. It's just presented better. Most part. La pinata. You can. It's. It's going to be good everywhere you go. It's hard to screw up Mexican food. Yeah, Italian food you can screw up because it's so detailed Mexican food. Some of their food's cooked twice on purpose.

[Brady]

We got this woman that reached out to Reddit, posted her story. She was babysitting a family and the mother laid into her because when they were out, she was babysitting. Put the kids down to sleep, she was hungry, she ordered doordash and the mom came back and found out she ordered doordash and she was upset that she would let a stranger come by and lay food in front of the door while they were out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's not such a big deal, by the way.

[Brady]

Evidently it was for somebody.

[John Holmberg]

Said they just changed their band name to high end Mexican. I like.

[Brady]

We got a dude that got busted illegally fishing. This happened in Oregon. He was fishing for the chinook salmon, which is a game fish. You gotta have a license.

[Jason]

You gotta have a license to fish in most places.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he's an expert.

[Brady]

Not only that fishing now it's just to obey the fishing hours. You're not allowed to fish until hour after.

[John Holmberg]

Huh?

[Brady]

You can only fish an hour after sunset, which would have been 9:57pm at the time. So he, they caught him at 10:40pm There was four Chinook salmon laying on the bank. Three were gutted, one hadn't. Yet the guy was catching them and when the game and fish warden showed up to bust the guy, he was wearing a white hat, white sunglasses that were upside down and a shirt that read Master baiter.

[John Holmberg]

He's a fisherman.

[Jason]

He's your.

[John Holmberg]

He's a fisherman. He's Brady the fisherman.

[Jason]

Finally.

[John Holmberg]

You want to explain that shirt, sir?

[Brady]

The dude was identified as Garrett Morrison, who's 20 years old and he's a popular, well known fisherman in that area.

[John Holmberg]

Sure, he's funny. He's masturbator. Well, they'll find him. He'll be fishing again tomorrow.

[Brady]

He's, you know, not only catching the game fish, got counts of waste of game fish.

[John Holmberg]

Gutted him and left it.

[Brady]

Angling with a prohibited method.

[John Holmberg]

Dynamite.

[Brady]

Angling during prohibited hours.

[John Holmberg]

Was he on the res?

[Brady]

He was fishing in a. Near a dam, which is then one of the charges. Angling in a prohibited area.

[John Holmberg]

My dad got in trouble on the reservation once for cleaning his fish in a non designated fish cleaning area. They hit him hard. It's like 350 bucks. He had a couple of fish guts. He was like I was going to clean it up. And he goes, you're not allowed to clean them here. I didn't know that. You can't do it. And it was like eight feet to his right with like a designated line. It's like you got to go over there. And he's like, he threw a fit.

[Brady]

I wonder why that is attracting other.

[John Holmberg]

Like it's to steal money from me because nobody would ever think about it. So they come by and it's like you can't do it here. They were watching him. Second he started to cut one open, it was over.

[Brady]

Got a Florida man, 25 year old Henry Alvarado. He was at Planet Fitness when they announced that they were closing for the night. For some reason that sent Henry into a frenzy. He stripped off his clothing, ran naked through the gym, crawled into the ceiling, knocked down several tiles, felt the building and then tried to start a fire in the bathroom. The gym called the police. When they showed up, they found Henry hiding inside a tanning bed and arrested him still naked. He was charged with indecent experience.

[John Holmberg]

You called this a Henry frenzy. He had a Henry frenzy.

[Brady]

Henry frenzy.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. I hope that never happens to me. Oh, feeling a little Henry frenzy. Come on. You just take off all your clothes and start running around. You know, in a weird way, I kind of do hope that someday I experience that. Whatever that euphoria is. I don't know. I want to know where that brain goes to where you're like, sans clothes. I'm gonna start wrecking some stuff. Just for a minute.

[Jason]

Feel the freedom.

[John Holmberg]

Just today. I've never done it before today. No, no. I'm just saying like that in the.

[Brady]

70S, the whole streaking thing was.

[John Holmberg]

Streaking is for fun. I'm talking about a dude who goes, screw this. Takes his clothes off and then jumps.

[Jason]

Up into the ceiling.

[Brady]

Grand Theft Auto.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Just starts knocking stuff. It might be from Grand Theft Auto. I might be like inspired by the game. But you just lose it and all your clothes come off and you're just. And you're okay with that. And then you go into the Walmart and you start knocking stuff off shelves and then get chased and you hide somewhere silly.

[Brady]

He did a variety of things. Start a fire.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And he starts fighting. Yeah. Because everything seems like a good idea when you're naked and mad. It's like, all right, you know what? Propane. Everything he saw, he used. I'm going to turn this hose on and I'm going to start a fire and I'm going to go in the tanning bed. No one will ever find me. And then they do. And you're like, that's over. That was fun.

[Brady]

The US Consumer Product Safety Commission recalled around 5 million above the ground pools after concluding that they were connected with the drowning deaths of Leave nine children. What?

[Jason]

Wait a minute.

[Brady]

The names of the pools available, you know, they're sold at Walmart, Target from 2007 to 2022.

[Jason]

But can't a kid drown in any pool? Doesn't that mean we should recall?

[Brady]

Well, the problem is, evidently they noticed there was straps on the outside of the kids were grabbing them, getting stuck in there.

[John Holmberg]

Remember when they used to have. That was back in the 90s when they were like touting how awesome the filters that were getting stronger and stronger in your pools were. And then that like a bunch of people started getting their hair caught in them and their hands would stick and they couldn't. It would actually suck you down to the bottom and you couldn't detach.

[Brady]

Pool names if you know you have a best way. Coleman, Intex, Poly Group. They all have re. Have Been recalled.

[John Holmberg]

They're temporary pools above the ground. Okay, so this is a poor person's problem.

[Brady]

Pretty much, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They need to keep an eye on their children.

[Brady]

Or you just can't take the heat anymore.

[John Holmberg]

Let's.

[Brady]

I don't know what they were on. Let's get, you know, spend a couple.

[John Holmberg]

Hundred bucks, just hose yourself off. Especially in Arizona, there's getting above ground pool here. You are the ultimate hillbilly. Anyone with an above ground pool that I'm talking to right now, they know too. They're not like, they tune down. They know. No, they're not mad. They know. I know. He's right. You can't have an above ground pool here.

[Brady]

We did a beach party in college and we put. We went to Walmart, basically bought the above the ground and put it in the basement.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, cool. Until it broke and then it floods everything. Oh, there's a lot of water in there. Holmberg's morning sickness. Oh, my hillbilly family in Indiana has like a couple of them have above ground pools. And by the way, they're like the richest people in this city because of the pool. Like, you see their big wide backyards, this giant thing. And they built decks and stuff around them like it's. But it's not. It's like they built it all up. Oh, yeah, you gotta climb stairs on these wooden decks. And they get real slippery. Everybody gets out and flops backwards. There's some head bouncing because they got a Thompson's water seal it. You're in the Midwest, there's snow, so these things hit water. And there are ice rinks and there's a hundred kids in that ugly ass piss circle. Hillbilly Indiana kids just with their ticks and God knows what else is on their gross little Midwestern bodies. But the deck is extraordinary. It usually is better than the house.

[Brady]

There's a Japanese company that's come up with a new invention for the office workplace. The company's called giraffe nap. And they've developed upright napping capsules that you can sleep in the office. Pretty cool. It looks like a little circular sauna.

[John Holmberg]

All right.

[Brady]

Here'S the setup.

[John Holmberg]

If you look at the neat and then just go in there and kind of.

[Brady]

So it kind of puts you in that like almost like those massage chairs.

[John Holmberg]

Upright. Yeah.

[Brady]

And it supports your body completely.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brady]

And you're asleep. You know back in the day in high school when you fall asleep at.

[John Holmberg]

Your desk, you know how this ends? Yeah. A bunch of dudes are gonna jerk off in here. Yeah, Somebody's gonna sit in it.

[Brady]

It's. Oh, yeah, you could. You know, I could do it. I thought you had a couple.

[Jason]

No.

[Brady]

No.

[John Holmberg]

You're not gonna have sex?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Take a little break. I sleepy. He goes, gets in there, and the next thing you know, he leaves a little action for the. By the way, Tom is a concerning listener. He's emailed and said, hey, nine deaths over 15 years isn't that bad a ratio. That's a little heavy.

[Brady]

It's over time.

[John Holmberg]

You know, when you're shooting for zero, though, in any time frame, nine is super high.

[Brady]

And if you find out it's all the same way.

[John Holmberg]

They're all tangled up in your bad design.

[Brady]

I'm gonna go trend.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Nine. Nine deaths in 15 years. You're right if we're talking about auto accidents. But it's specifically designed to have zero deaths outside of just the water. A mistake. But when the pool is actually killing the kid, not the water, the water's the second problem. That's a pretty high number, Tom.

[Brady]

I only have one radio video.

[John Holmberg]

All right, let's get to it.

[Brady]

It's the bull fighting ring. I. What do they call it like that?

[John Holmberg]

It's Mexican poker.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

With women.

[Brady]

With broads.

[John Holmberg]

There's seven or eight. How many of them are six of them sitting at a table and they're in the bull ring and. Oh, they're baby bulls. Little bulls.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's a little ones.

[John Holmberg]

So that's why women are bigger. She's bigger than the bull. Oh, they have no ability to get away from.

[Brady]

And the crowd is loving.

[John Holmberg]

The bull is 30ft and charging right at them, and they stand there. There's a dog that just knocked one of the ladies over.

[Brady]

You don't need anybody. You don't look at her.

[John Holmberg]

She's trying to get out. She can't. It's a. It's a baby.

[Brady]

It's adorable.

[Jason]

It's just me or did she squeeze through those bars?

[John Holmberg]

It barely got through those bars, and those were thick. Show me that again.

[Brady]

Oh, listen to the ratchet.

[John Holmberg]

Completely unable to move. This big fat one stands up like she's going to tackle.

[Brady]

Dropped it.

[John Holmberg]

There's a. There's a. Like a German shorthair out there that's causing as much trouble as the bull. They don't know what they're running from. If it's on four legs, it's gonna kill them. This is hilarious. Have you no lateral movement skill at all? The one girl picked up a folding chair and just held it and Got mashed.

[Brady]

But what's funny is you're. The reaction that you have is just what they're thinking. It's just a baby bull. It brings a little fun.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, but.

[Brady]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Look, Brady, these broads volunteered for a bull.

[Brady]

I know.

[John Holmberg]

You can't be surprised when the bull comes out and the whole game of Mexican poker is the last person seated.

[Brady]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know who won none. The bull hit one girl and they all ran away. They all volunteered for this. Like I can do that. And the second the bull gets there, they all leave. One girl gets hit by the bull, and then they all get up and leave. The game is over. Technically, the fattest one. She struggles the most to get out of her chair, so she's the winner. And then they go like eight feet away thinking that the game's still a thing. If you're gonna get here's chair defense. Here's another thing. If you're playing Mexican poker and you've decided to stand up, don't just stand in the ring. You're still a target. Do what this one does and run out and slide through the pole. Oh, man, that's a tight squeeze. And those are about two feet apart. She barely makes that body through there.

[Brady]

Your folding chair is not going to hold up against even a baby.

[John Holmberg]

Just don't stand. Well, the bull knows that the game's over, right? No, it doesn't. It has no idea.

[Jason]

I got one that was sent in.

[John Holmberg]

Idiot.

[Jason]

We might have seen this one.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[Jason]

Kids getting hurt.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. I'm all over this.

[Brady]

This is great. Watch that.

[John Holmberg]

He's in this little fake scooter thing, and it goes towards the wall. And then it's. It's slow mo. His face. And he rakes down a carpeted wall on his little manufacture. It's a fake car down a ramp and it hits. They even have a little bl. Kind of stop the car, but it doesn't work. Oh, and then his face.

[Brady]

Just an American history act.

[John Holmberg]

Zoo carpets their walls and have wooden floors.

[Jason]

That looks like. Not a house. I would guess that's a. Like a school or a play center or something.

[John Holmberg]

It is.

[Jason]

Oh, it's got lines on the floor.

[John Holmberg]

Somebody's getting sued. Face tracks down the.

[Jason]

And then somebody sent this the. The.

[John Holmberg]

Get enough of that stuff.

[Jason]

This is here. This is the avenue side.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, well, there's an ass just being poked out. What is that? And this is here, too. This is a. Oh, we're just going through a bunch of hookers. The loop on the west side, 27th Avenue, there's a bunch of hookers out with their. This is our street. And then it cuts to, like, Mexican lowriders and then asses. Hooker asses. Interesting. Thank you.

[Brady]

I noticed that the hookers, you know, walk around, and then there's a little van that says Smart Scrubs, Right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there it is. Smart Scrubs gets a free plug. Yes. Smart Scrubs is always around where the hooker's asses are out because there's usually a leak. Smart Scrubs got to be there with their brushes to clean that stain. And maybe the hookers go to Smart Scrubs and get dolled up for the next client. Hi, Smart Scrubs. I'm all done. All right, spread them. Oh, you got pounded.

[Brady]

Get my ass too.

[John Holmberg]

I made an extra 300 tonight. Huh? Those broads playing Mexican poker. Who wants to play? Oh, we do. We have five of them. Okay, what's the rules? Oh, you just don't get up, the bull's gonna come charging at the table. Last person standing wins 100 bucks. Okay.

[Brady]

It's easy.

[John Holmberg]

The bull gets close, and they all say it's a baby bull. In fact, two of you are bigger than the bull. Don't worry about it.

[Brady]

Don't tell him.

[John Holmberg]

I wouldn't be surprised if it happen again if the bull's afraid of you. So just stay at the table. If we get up, the game's over. Okay. They all stood up and just stood there.

[Brady]

And the dudes at the rodeo are like, should we send some rodeo text in there? No, the dog will handle the bull.

[John Holmberg]

And the German, Shorter. Chase the bull out. That's the worst version of that. That was the WNBA of Mexican Poker. Like, I've seen Mexican dudes sit there, like, with real bulls.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Blow the table up, and the guy just stays like, wasn't me. There's two guys holding. These girls are like, I didn't know these were the rules. That bull is almost a hundred pounds.

[Jason]

You got some challenges to your Mexican food, man.

[John Holmberg]

Come on.

[Brady]

Holmberg.

[Jason]

Los Pinos on 35th Avenue, and Camelback is solid. They're all across the street from a Mexican sushi place, a Mexican hot dog place, and a questionable massage parlor.

[Brady]

But like, a formal. Like a steak 44 level. There isn't one.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I'm not.

[Brady]

There's one in Gilbert Isabella's.

[Jason]

Oh, Isabella's Amore is good.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but they just charge a little extra. You're getting the same thing.

[Brady]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

It's just presentation. The food's not like you're gonna get the Best refried beans at a regular Mexican place. You go to a high end Mexican place, they're not doing anything special. There's charging you more because it looks prettier. They don't just slop it on the.

[Brady]

Plate, you know, kind of like a steak or a. Yeah, but they got.

[John Holmberg]

That at the other. You just don't pay attention. Like, you can go to La Piano and get a steak, but what are you doing? Yeah, it's crazy. I want to watch girl Mexican poker all day. That was the best part, is how dumb they were after they stood up. They didn't make any attempt to get away from the ring.

[Brady]

The first brushing.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Brady]

Was a panic.

[John Holmberg]

The WNBA of Mexican poker is just hilarious. They were so bad at it. And then the dog.

[Brady]

That was my favorite.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they could have just gotten rid of the bull and just released the hounds and these chicks would have done the same thing. Probably got knocked down, too. They hit the dirt and the two of them fell and didn't even get close to the bull. They just fell over each other. Oh, my God, it is kids.

[Brady]

Chaos in there. Dog's got it.

[John Holmberg]

Don't worry, I'm not sending a dude in there. It's just a baby bull. The dog will scare it.

[Brady]

And he did.

[John Holmberg]

Any of those girls just put their hands in the air and went, rah. That bull would have stopped. Like, geez, she's huge. Well, he thought it was a bear act.

[Brady]

Really big.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that one you don't. The one didn't have to. She just was really big. Just put your arms. Ah. That bull would be like, I'm steering clear of that giant broad.

[Brady]

I'll put my folding chair out in front and stop him.

[John Holmberg]

All right, Bosco, get out there and get that bull. Good boy. There you go. Billy Gardell is coming.

[Jason]

Yeah, they're here.

[John Holmberg]

Are they? Billy Gardell.

[Jason]

There you go.

[John Holmberg]

One of my favorite comedians of all time.

[Jason]

He might be in his Steelers jersey.

[John Holmberg]

And he is actually. Yeah, probably one of my favorite comedians of all time. And I've seen him once. That's all you need. But I do know he's one of the most magnificent. Yeah. So smart, so bright. Just makes all the right decisions in life. Steeler fan Billy Gardell joins us in just moments. It's not yet Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station in the time it takes you to actually board a flight.

[Brady]

From Group 8 now boarding Premier Altitude Elite Club members.

[John Holmberg]

You could have bought a Hyundai on Amazon. Visit HyundaiUSA.com or call 562-314-4603 for more details. Limited availability pickup through participating Hyundai dealer in select markets.