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John Holmberg
You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by mmpguns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.
Brady Bogan
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John Holmberg
You just gave me my reach around. Here's another best of rerun from the morning sickness. It's time now for Brady to give you the rest of the news that we're not paying attention to quite yet. It's known as the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our friends at All Pro Shades got a call from a guy yesterday. He was like, I gotta get something done. My back patio is it. I'm like, yes. What are you waiting for? All Pro Shade they're getting inundated. You guys are calling them like crazy. I don't know why you didn't know about them before, but now that you do and you've seen Brady resting comfortably in his back patio in the little commercial that runs on the Internet sometimes just takes you by surprise. It's a beautiful little setup. All Pro Shade will do it for you too. They'll put shade in your backyard, drop that temperature about 20 degrees in the area you need it most, and make a little room basically outside of your house. It's like adding square footage. The best thing in the world. And I asked Doug Hopkins this all the time. The new future of home sales is not just your house outdoor living space. And All Pro Shade folks can help with that. AllProchade.com that's where you go. Brady reported.
Dan
Good Friday morning to your Phoenix hello world. We've made it.
John Holmberg
Hi.
Dan
Someone asked the question that they get a lot social media. How do you answer when someone says, how are you? Someone says, hey, passing in the hallway. How are You?
John Holmberg
Mine's good. How are you?
Dan
Every time people are talking about on social media what their response is, not too bad, can't complain.
John Holmberg
Ah, you know, my big one is and I catch myself saying I'm cooking right along. How are you? And I don't know why I say that.
E
Living the dream that some Dan said.
John Holmberg
No, no, I don't know I'm cooking. I just want to be different than fine you.
Dan
Another day in paradise. I'm alive.
John Holmberg
I'm breathing earth's air. Maybe for the last time. I hope.
Dan
Hanging in there.
John Holmberg
Hanging in there.
Dan
That's kind of a. I'm getting by.
John Holmberg
Nobody ever says terrible. You want to talk about it? Which is what they're saying this day and age we should be. I know.
Dan
Present and accounted for.
John Holmberg
It's just annoying. That's a boss or a chief right there. He just got boss. Just got boss. Yeah.
Dan
One person said there. Usually they say just crying. How you doing today? I'm just crying.
John Holmberg
Well, if you ask somebody who looks sad, are you okay? Like you don't say how are you doing? You're like, are you all right? Is everything okay? No, I feel bad cuz I don't want to like, I don't know. I tend to want to help out and I don't know why. If it's someone I like, I'm not doing that to a stranger. If I see somebody kind of down at their desk, I'm like, oh, walk by that. Hi. I won't ask how you're doing, but if I like, like, you'll be like, you know, all right. And then. And then you're in a pickle because they might start talking.
E
Guy says he has a new phrase for you. Okay, try my tried and true John. I always respond with, well, I'm sucking air and not so I'm winning.
John Holmberg
Wow. I don't know what that means. Nope, I'm not answering anything like that. I'm sticking a good you imagine soon as it passes you in the hole, I'm sucking in. I'm not some winning. Oh, good to see you there, Greg.
Dan
Minutes after this happened yesterday, I immediately got a text. I thought it was a weather alert, but no, it's the food alert. Food threaten alert. The Oscar Meyer mobile crashed and flipped in the 294 highway in Chicago.
John Holmberg
I would pay to see that.
Dan
No injuries.
John Holmberg
I would pay to watch that.
Dan
There is a picture of it rolling on its side.
John Holmberg
There's no video of this thing just rolling down the. I don't know. Oh my God.
Dan
And then I got a couple of.
John Holmberg
People that text me, hey, oh my God. What's gonna even better is there's gonna be like some sort of forklift that has to put it. It's gonna look like it's picking up off a grill.
Dan
It did not, you know, factor in on the distribution of glizzies. And don't worry, there are six wiener mobiles that travel around the country.
John Holmberg
Let me just tell you.
Dan
So we're down to five, right?
John Holmberg
That is not the main distribution vehicle for the hot dog.
Dan
Some people don't know that. They think it's full of glizzies.
John Holmberg
No. Well, you just let them.
Dan
You'll get a whistle.
John Holmberg
You led them to believe. It's not that. That is not the thing. That is not the A to B mechanism for the hot dog. More amazingly, just a fat guy Batmobile. It's the bat signal for fat people. They see it, they run to it.
Dan
We have a huge court case going on right now. A man named Martin Quintana has been trying to open a taco place in a strip mall in Fort Wayne. He ran into some red tape. Thanks to the contract that limits the type of restaurants allowed. It says you can only open a place that sells made to order or Subway style sandwiches. So he sued, claiming tacos and burritos are sandwiches. His case has been making its way through the legal system and a superior court judge just ruled on Monday that yes, they are sandwiches.
John Holmberg
Judge Brady, what do you think of this? How do you rule? Not considering the sandwich element, but what this guy's actually fighting for in his case. Are they sandwiched?
Dan
Yes, because they are.
John Holmberg
Give your opinion.
Dan
Meat, cheese and vegetables wrapped in a tortilla, which is a form of bread.
John Holmberg
More or less. Okay, okay. So hot dogs are argument.
Dan
Yes.
John Holmberg
Okay, there we go. It's a form of a sandwich. I believe that now. The reason I think that he's right is I go to you, Judge Guido. Are lasagna noodles noodles? Yes, Our spaghetti noodles. Noodles. Yes. They're drastically different. Still made of the same thing though. So is bread. But is there a difference between like white bread and tortillas? I don't know, the ingredients pretty similar.
Dan
Piata is a flat noodle, but.
John Holmberg
Right, but like a hot dog is bread. Like, you know it's bread. Right. And you know, lasagna's noodles and angel hair is noodles. And you family it up. Why can't you do that to hot dogs? I never understood why it's such a big deal. That's a sandwich bread and meat. This a sandwich.
E
Agreed.
Dan
There's a new study out of China that says that the single most important contributor to healthy aging and longevity and mental well being.
John Holmberg
Botox.
Dan
Eating cheese.
John Holmberg
Okay, okay, before you get too excited, all right. No, we're not.
Dan
You are down on Cheez itself will get you eternal life.
Ralphie
Ralphie, Mayor Brady's fat guy news. Listen up. Cheese gives you forever life. It's like me and green mob dog tie boss. You give me some cheese. Good stuff too. Like Gouda. Give me some of that Havarti. Oh my God, Brady. Havarti cheese.
Dan
To live longer, you need a happy mental well being. For those reported the most robust levels of mental health and stress resilience.
Ralphie
That's right.
Dan
Seem to eat more cheese and fruit.
Ralphie
That's right. A charcuterie without that meat. Give me some cheese. I ate a ton of cheese. And when I died I looked young. Cause I was 46. That's right, Brady. You know what helps you stay young forever? At least visually? Tons and tons of cheese. Because you'll never make it to 50.
John Holmberg
That is the least accurate report ever.
Ralphie
Shut up, Albert. Hot garbage. Let Brady finish.
John Holmberg
The new.
Dan
After the success of the foot long cookies, Subway continues their footlong arsenal. They debuted their new snack called Dippers, which are basically savory roll ups. It's flat bread rolled up with meats and cheese. And then you dip it in three types of sauce because of. So you got your pepperoni and cheese dipper. It's a chicken and cheese.
John Holmberg
A foot of. Look at your face. There is joy flying off of you.
Dan
There's happiness involved.
John Holmberg
Yeah. A foot of.
E
But remember John, like a few minutes ago before.
Dan
I've been doing this for years.
John Holmberg
Yes.
E
Said that you went. You went Biden.
Dan
What you're doing right now is not.
John Holmberg
He had a Biden moment a second ago watching a video with the sound down. It just looked like Brady McConnell out on peripherally. This one. Yeah. This is pure. This is Trump at a rally.
E
Your cheeks are flushed.
John Holmberg
Yeah, you're a little red.
Ralphie
That's good stuff. One foot of dippers, Brady.
E
How hard are you, by the way? Asia. No American fat sauce at all.
John Holmberg
They're a ranch. Nope.
Dan
Shocker.
Ralphie
Never liked them. Never liked the entire continent. I bring my own ranch.
Dan
Oh, thanks.
E
Texters. They all miss Ralphie. Like five.
Ralphie
Course they do. What's in this? Ralphie's here in spirit though. Cause every time Brady tells you eat a pound of cheese to stay young, I'll come back. Brady can you.
Dan
Always backs me up.
Ralphie
Go over there to that cheese shop you told me about. World of Cheese, 7th Avenue. Just start the Fountain of Youth. People forget that part. Cheese. Fountain of Youth. It's a fondue.
Dan
It's a supplement.
Ralphie
All right, I gotta go. Cause I gotta go get some cheeses. Stay young up here. Hot garbage.
Dan
In North Wildwood, New Jersey, we had a guy that got arrested. He was on the beach with his daughter and a seagull was trying to snag his daughter's french fries. He was able to snag one of the seagulls and decapitate it.
John Holmberg
In front of his daughter.
Ralphie
Yeah.
Dan
And other people on the beach.
John Holmberg
That's horrifying.
Dan
So then he goes to the people working on it.
John Holmberg
That would be pretty. You were just on the beach. This is. You're not just admitting something? That's not getting. My Brady learned to fly. I would never decapitate a seagull. Brady was flying around the beach. It's harder than it looks. But that's my fry. Ah. Ah. Drop the fry. He's coming for you.
Dan
I think I would have no chance at a fry.
John Holmberg
Beaks off, bitch. That's mine.
Dan
They know.
John Holmberg
Please, somebody draw that cartoon. What the. I just stole my front fry. Not for long. Where'd he go? He's flying away. Red Bull gives me wings.
Dan
He goes up to one of the workers on the beach that are going, I need a bag. Holding the seagull on his other hand.
John Holmberg
This head doesn't have a body attached. And I'm up one fry. You couldn't give the seagull a french fry? Out killing it. Yeah.
Dan
And when the cops arrived and he.
John Holmberg
Resisted arrest, I imagine that the. The mug shot's going to be a similar body shape to what we look at everyday. Boys. He's holding his little sign. San Diego inmate number What? This is Bullpucky. I paid good money for those.
Dan
It was self defense.
John Holmberg
Thanks to Biden, the prices are sky high for beach food, French fries, politics.
Dan
I paid eight bucks for these.
John Holmberg
Goddamn environmentalists have made the beach more birds than people. This is a bunch of bullpucky. Were you flying? Yes. I have the power of flight. If something steals my meal, I grow wings like Red Bull. It happens. Yes. That is a kind of the boys in me. I'm flying. Crime fighting Brady. All your culinary crimes solved. You got what?
Dan
Science News. Hello, my friends. I'm Professor Brady Bogan. This is your Science News. A new study found we might be able to find aliens by looking for traces of warp drive activity in outer space. Something called Gravitational waves.
John Holmberg
Good. Waste time on that.
Dan
Scientists in Japan came up with a way to wrap a robot and living human skin cells grown in a lab.
John Holmberg
Oh, no. They're doing it look kind of creepy. They're building people. It's Blade Runner. It's the people. Skin over the. The exoskeleton is actually human skin. Laboratory created. Oh. If they ever get the eyes right. If AI starts walking around with us. That's the scarier part. It's not so much that they can build something that looks like a person. They've been doing that with sex dolls for a while. It's when AI gets involved and can communicate pretty easily with you. You'll go away.
Dan
Not far off.
John Holmberg
You will. Unfortunately, I think that's true. Pretty sure that sex robot's gonna be able to get to know you with programs soon. That and then adapt. Oh. Oh, great. Then they're gonna. About the not taking out the trash and everything else. They might as well stick with the real thing. It starts cleaning. Yeah. Yeah. You might as well just stick with the useless real thing. Yuck. That's right. What kind of robot world are we creating if it's going to be exactly the same as the thing we're trying to escape? I don't want my robots to be just like real broads. Like eliminate all the issues, take out all the weirdness. They won't want to clean, make it. Want to do chores. Oh, you're gonna give it a day. Tired.
Dan
You just clean the house.
John Holmberg
Yeah. You're not my pleasure. Yeah. Hey, while I sleep, why don't you clean up again? Okay. I love that. Yes. This is. This is what I've been waiting for. I don't need the robot to cross its arms and tap its toe. What do you mean clean the house? Like. Ah, Christ, you don't do anything around here. Oh, you're a robot. You.
Dan
There's no headaches. There's no. I have too much stuff going on.
John Holmberg
You know, Program to have headaches. I'm not feeling well. It's too hot in bed. Oh, you have temperature control. Turn a fan on inside you or something. Holmberg's morning sickness. Hey, Byron. I was looking at MMP Guns.com's website. You have everything, and the prices are incredible.
Byron
Yes, sir. MMP Guns.com has over 400,000 products for sale daily. Everything from firearms, ammunition, accessories, optics, clothing, decoys and more. The best part is if you see it on our website, it's in stock and ready to ship.
John Holmberg
Wait, there's no back orders?
Byron
Nope. We work with all our distributors, so what you see on our site is what's actually available. We ship all over the country, so we're not just for Arizonans anymore. If the firearm you want is legal in your state, we can get it to a dealer for you to pick up.
John Holmberg
Sounds simple. That's why I always go to MMP Guns dot com. You understand? It's been a long day. No, it hasn't. You're like eight weeks old.
Dan
Geek squad. I need you to take my AI back.
John Holmberg
We need to start getting claimed.
Dan
She was bloated.
John Holmberg
Yeah. She ate chips and salsa. I told her not to. They were the other chips. Like our chips. Not the ones she's used to. Not like microchips, dummy. Another vacation. She's got an electric belly full of salsa and. Yeah. Did you give her a goddamn period? What the Were you thinking? Why does my robot bleed for six days? The real ones are shorter.
Dan
That's where you feel dumb because he comes over and looks at. Well, here's where you went wrong. You on the checklist there? You didn't blank out the period.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Make it as real as possible.
Dan
Gotta turn that off.
John Holmberg
Power steering? Check. Premium wheels? Check. Spam periods? No. Do you want it to have attitude? Do you want it to challenge your thoughts? Oh, I'll stick with the real thing. No, I just get a wife in that case. Idiots.
Dan
Good stories on.
John Holmberg
Yeah, good stories. Video gameplay. Sports fan To a degree. Doesn't talk during the game. TV on. She goes to rest mode. Never ask me who this guy is on the screen. We're watching the same goddamn thing. Who's that we. It's the first minute of the show. I don't know yet either. Is he gonna be important? Yes. Just everyone you're looking at is probably important to the plotter. They wouldn't be there. Stop asking dumb questions. Three minutes in. Is that the same guy's the first guy. Turn it off.
Dan
The space station astronauts had to take shelter on Tuesday after an old Russian satellite broke apart and caused a cloud of debris. They think Russia might have blown it up. Testing a new anti satellite missile.
John Holmberg
Oh.
Dan
China brought back the first samples of the far side of the moon. Wait on the reports. If we get information on them two astronauts.
John Holmberg
What's the news there?
Dan
China has chunks of the first ones to bring back samples from the far side of the moon.
John Holmberg
They went to the other side, they dug a hole, the other thing fell over, right? Yeah. Ironically, they dug all the way through and they ended up in China. Who knew? Oh, look it's the same down there.
Dan
The two astronauts Boeing sent to the space station might have to be brought back home by SpaceX.
John Holmberg
They got a dragon. Yeah. They got to build a big machine to drag the space station out of orbit.
Dan
Well, NASA is going to pay SpaceX 843 million to destroy the space station in 2030. And what they're doing, they're designing a craft just like you're saying. It can dock with it and then guide it back to Earth and land it in the ocean.
John Holmberg
They said the other day they were going to just pull it out of its orbit and then just let it float away.
Dan
Yeah, well, they're making sure.
John Holmberg
Awesome. Yeah. Got to get out of our pool because if it starts sliding back, that space station coming at us is not a good idea.
Dan
Well, yeah, this sounds like it says it. It's guiding it back to Earth so it lands on the ocean.
John Holmberg
That'd be good too.
Dan
The plans to help private companies build their own space stations, which NASA and tourists will get to use.
John Holmberg
Okay, okay.
Dan
There's a hospital in Texas.
John Holmberg
John Lovitz has changed my mind on space, by the way. We had that conversation about going into space. And he goes, you already are in space. Like, hey, that's a good point. Why do you appreciate it so much being like 80ft above where you're already in space? I'm like, john, you're right, idiot.
Dan
This hospital in Texas is the first in the US to start using hologram technology for doctor visits. It's kind of like a 3D Zoom call.
John Holmberg
Without all that.
Dan
That's your science news.
John Holmberg
They. So they can't finger you anymore.
Dan
Yeah, it's just a hologram.
John Holmberg
Look at you and you spin around. You can't look inside. All right.
Dan
There's a report on the happiest industries, which analyze things like culture and values, diversity, inclusion, work, life balance, money, career opportunities, senior management. And they determined that the happiest gig.
John Holmberg
Onlyfans is working in construction. No kidding.
Dan
Accounting and taxes is second, followed by manufacturing, tech and healthcare construction. They only looked at 10 industries, but the ones that ranked lowest for happiness, what was below those?
John Holmberg
I mean, yeah, I was gonna say my dad did construction my whole childhood and everything. Never came home happy. Imagine being on a roof in Phoenix in August. That guy was not like every day. He was wound so tight, I thought he'd pop. I told him, this is how tight my dad was until, like, he's a different person. He'll tell you. I remember once when I was about 19, I'm like, I gotta tell you, he was mad at me for something. I'm like, I'm worried about you. What the hell are you talking about? You're gonna have a heart attack. And I'm serious when I say that that was the first time that as kind of an adult, I said, I love you. I don't want this to happen. Shut the up. I'm fine. And he got mad at me for telling him. He's mad all the time. Oh, you don't need to worry about me. You worry about yourself, you little piece of. Okay, okay. I'm just saying you're wound a little tight. I'm wound tight? You're about to see what tight wound looks like. You're not too old to punch square in the face. Like, I'm telling you, I care about you and I don't need to hear it. I got a lot of my mind, like, all right, never mind. Speakers. I gotta listen. Speakers out of a van. Turns out that's his camp.
Dan
It was a bad day.
John Holmberg
Every day was a bad day. And then the days that were good. It was like we were at Disneyland. He was fine, but, man. And now he's the. He's the happiest, nicest person you could ever run across. And all of his friends used to tell me all the time, your dad's hilarious. I know. He's not. Oh, he's so funny. All he does is joke. And, yeah, I'm his. I guarantee. I got the same, too. It was weird. He'd come home, I'm like, oh, what didn't I do today? I'm gonna get yelled at. And he wasn't abusive or anything. He was just always just. He's type A, wound up like a. It was a tight, man. I love you.
Dan
Every day my dad came home, it was, hey, hey. My mom had a drink ready for him.
John Holmberg
Let's not talk about my gay brother and watch tv, okay? You guys were the opposite. You just pretended nothing was going on. My dad.
Dan
Go play tennis.
John Holmberg
All my dad thought was that the house was about to explode and we're gonna lose everything. And he was fine. He was just worried constantly. So tight. I love you. I don't want you to die. And I feel like your heart's gonna say you don't. You shut the up. I remember that. I was worried about his heart. And then it pissed me.
Dan
Well, the lowest for happiness was retail and commerce. Then it was legal tourism, transport and logistics and hospitality.
John Holmberg
Hospitality means I gotta deal with the general public, and they're impossible. It's awful.
E
John, the reason your dad was so angry all the time is because construction is full of degenerates on the lower level. They're happy with what they get from the work they do. The type A personalities like your dad are not because he has to. He's all wounded in tight from being surrounded by a bunch of ignorant idiots.
Dan
And assholes all day.
E
He was the only sober guy in a bar full of drunks. To put it another way, there was.
John Holmberg
A lot of that. I did meet the people that worked for him and they were kind of dolts the guys that worked with him all the same. The office guy. Yeah, those field dudes.
E
Somebody's gotta be in charge, right?
John Holmberg
This guy just emails construction happy the we are your old man. Sounds like I do when I come home from working outside all goddamn day. I don't know. A lot of really like chipper construction fellas. Golly, honey, we got to frame another house today.
Dan
We're two weeks behind.
John Holmberg
We're two weeks behind. And I got the owner of the company up my ass so far. I can taste him. Good night. I gotta get up in an hour.
Dan
I don't know if you knew about this, but some people develop a weird and terrifying allergy to red meat after a bite from a Lone Star ticket. But the good news is you can still eat pork. From a surprising source. Genetically modified pigs created for organ transplant research.
John Holmberg
What are you talking about?
Dan
That if you have this allergy, you're bitten by a Lone Star.
John Holmberg
Who are you talking to? I think us. It's like two people on the planet that may relate to this. I don't even know what a Lone Star tick is. Is that a tick from the restaurant?
Dan
By one. And you're allergic to red meat and you can't have it. You can still have, by the way.
John Holmberg
Bacon if at all I ever have a tick. And you guys don't go, hey, John, you got a tick, don't let it bite you. I. It would have to be in my pubes.
Dan
So.
E
Wait a minute. I'm confused. If you have the allergy and you get bit by this tick, then you can start eating.
Dan
You can eat this genetically modified pig that's used for organ transplant.
John Holmberg
Why couldn't I eat that? Anyway, you can't eat regular.
E
Bitten by the pit or.
John Holmberg
But I. But if I don't. If I. This is dumb. I'm not. I'm not going to ask. If I don't have. You're going to regret it. If I. You're right. If I haven't been bitten by the tick. I can't eat the genetically modified pig.
Dan
No, you could still eat both.
John Holmberg
So it's just. Everyone can eat the pig.
Dan
No, you have to eat the. If you have the allergy, the only pig you can eat is the modified one.
John Holmberg
Oh, and the allergy comes only from being bitten by spider. Lone Star tick, which I don't even know is that only in Texas.
E
So what you did is you sent people out into the woods looking for Lone Star tick.
John Holmberg
No, you didn't. Nobody wants superhero. It's not a superhero thing. You lose powers. How. How am I again? Your news feeds are different than ours. That you tell foodies that to be worried of the Lone Star Tick. But you never told us where that is or what it is or what's the.
Dan
I didn't look up where Lone Star ticks reside.
John Holmberg
Gotta say, Texas.
Dan
That have been my, you know, strong guest.
John Holmberg
My smooth dolphin like body. Very, very, very sure that I'm not a tick.
Dan
You don't really camp all that much and you don't go to really heavy tick.
John Holmberg
Doesn't matter if I did. Ticks don't want to be on me. Ticks don't really dive onto this and go, I'm going to make a home here. There's like hair or they'd be all over your arms and stuff.
E
By the way, not surprisingly, there are many pictures. Oh yeah, the wiener mobile crash.
John Holmberg
It can't be easy to drive that thing.
Dan
That's a good one, right?
John Holmberg
Anyway, well, if you're worried about the Lone Star Tick, Brady's got your info there.
Dan
Got you covered. You can still eat meat.
John Holmberg
Well, no, you can't. Only one kind of meat you can eat. Robot me. Brady's tick conversation is something that got Biden to have to leave the the race. Clear this thing up. What the hell's he talking about? I'm heading over to the hip hop station where they talk about things. I understand. Yeah, I don't get the tick comments. That shouldn't even be news. Like there's no threat.
Dan
I was tying it into the pork news with the wiener mobile going, sure.
John Holmberg
Sure, I understand that. But there's zero threat of this. Nobody at all is worried about the Lone Star tick making it so they'll never eat meat again. Jesus Christ. Maybe Brady is. Jesus Christ. Brady's all over the place. I feel like I have ADHD trying to listen to him. Some weird stories in that mix. That Lone Star tick one is the strangest of all of them.
Dan
I've got a Couple of radio videos.
John Holmberg
First one, by the way, I just got a text from my dad out of the blue. This is very Dan. I sent him. There was. Somebody sent me a picture of roads in Florida. It says Holmberg. Holmberg Road is to the left, Johnson Road is to the right. And Holmberg, of course, obviously my grandfather's name. And he married Isabel Johnson. So it's Homeburg Johnson. And I sent it to my dad and I'm like, how about this? My buddy in Florida just sent me this. It's your whole family. Stupid Swede. Should have stayed in Florida. Did you get your birthday box of meat yet? No. Thanks for the reveal. My birthday present is evidently a box.
Dan
Let me know when that arrives.
John Holmberg
Did you get your box of meat yet? No. Nah, I don't know. Expect something.
Dan
Can't wait for the unboxing.
John Holmberg
Here's your birthday meat stuff in your mouth.
Dan
Yeah, I got a new one coming in as well.
John Holmberg
Not for my dad.
Dan
No. Well, yeah, I'm gonna. What?
John Holmberg
You know your dad is.
Dan
Text him to send me a box of meat.
John Holmberg
See if my dad's no longer with us. And I don't get boxes of meat for my birthday anymore. Ah, God damn it. All right, I'll get my twink son's fat friend to box of meat. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. It's out of control now. 98 can.
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Brady Bogan
Thanks.
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Hyundai
The time it takes you to actually board that flight from Group 8.
John Holmberg
Now boarding Premier Altitude Elite club members.
Hyundai
You could have bought a Hyundai on Amazon. Yes, that Amazon where you buy everything else.
John Holmberg
Mid tier Altitude Elite. Feel free to board now.
Hyundai
So while you're waiting for them to make up new boarding groups, you can order your dream car and the dealer will have it ready in no time.
John Holmberg
Now boarding groups one through seven.
Dan
So close.
Hyundai
Visit HyundaiUSA.com or call 562-314-4603 for more details. Limited availability pickup through participating Hyundai dealer in select markets.
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode: 07-25-25 - BR - MIX - 8x - Survey Asks How Do You Respond To "Hi, How Are You?" Release Date: July 25, 2025
Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD delivers another engaging episode filled with humor, insightful discussions, and intriguing news segments. Hosted by John Holmberg alongside Brady Bogan, Dan, E, and Ralphie, this episode delves into everyday social interactions, bizarre incidents, legal battles over food classifications, health studies, and advancements in technology. Below is a comprehensive summary of the key points, discussions, insights, and conclusions from the episode.
[02:11 - 03:50]
The episode kicks off with a relatable topic: how people respond to the ubiquitous "Hi, how are you?" on social media. Dan introduces the subject by highlighting common responses like "Not too bad, can't complain."
Dan: "Every time people are talking about on social media what their response is, not too bad, can't complain."
[02:11]
John admits to occasionally saying unconventional responses such as "I'm cooking right along. How are you?" in an attempt to be different.
John Holmberg: "I'm cooking right along. How are you? And I don't know why I say that."
[02:30]
The conversation evolves into the frustration of ever-positive responses, with John expressing a desire for more genuine interactions.
John Holmberg: "Nobody ever says terrible. You want to talk about it? Which is what they're saying this day and age we should be."
[03:05]
E chimes in with a humorous take:
E: "I always respond with, 'Well, I'm sucking air and not so I'm winning.'"
[03:50]
This segment highlights the hosts' desire for authenticity in everyday conversations and the humorous lengths they go to break the monotony of standard replies.
[04:17 - 05:33]
A humorous yet alarming news story is shared about an Oscar Meyer mobile vehicle crashing on the 294 highway in Chicago.
Dan: "The Oscar Meyer mobile crashed and flipped in the 294 highway in Chicago. No injuries."
[04:33]
John expresses interest in witnessing the peculiar accident:
John Holmberg: "I would pay to see that."
[04:35]
The hosts joke about the nature of the incident, imagining the aftermath and the logistical challenges of such a unique vehicle.
Dan: "There are six wiener mobiles that travel around the country."
[05:05]
The discussion playfully critiques the practicality and purpose of the wiener mobile as a symbol rather than a functional distribution vehicle.
[05:33 - 07:44]
Dan brings up an unusual legal case involving Martin Quintana, who sued over the classification of tacos and burritos as sandwiches to bypass contractual limitations on restaurant types in Fort Wayne.
Dan: "It says you can only open a place that sells made to order or Subway style sandwiches. So he sued, claiming tacos and burritos are sandwiches."
[05:33]
Judge Brady rules in favor of Quintana, affirming that these items fit the sandwich category.
Dan: "Meat, cheese, and vegetables wrapped in a tortilla, which is a form of bread."
[06:25]
John draws parallels to other food classifications, questioning the rigid definitions of what constitutes a sandwich.
John Holmberg: "Is bread and meat. This a sandwich."
[07:09]
The segment humorously debates the arbitrary nature of food classifications and the lengths to which individuals will go to achieve their business goals.
[07:32 - 10:35]
A study from China is discussed, suggesting that increased cheese and fruit consumption correlates with healthier aging and better mental well-being.
Dan: "A new study found the single most important contributor to healthy aging and longevity and mental well-being."
[07:32]
Ralphie enthusiastically supports the findings, humorously claiming that cheese consumption keeps one looking young.
Ralphie: "Tons and tons of cheese. Because you'll never make it to 50."
[08:20]
John remains skeptical about the study's accuracy, leading to a playful exchange about the benefits and drawbacks of cheese consumption.
John Holmberg: "That is the least accurate report ever."
[08:42]
The segment underscores the blend of humor and skepticism the hosts employ when discussing health studies.
[08:42 - 10:15]
Subway's latest product, "Dippers," is introduced. These are savory roll-ups filled with meats and cheese, designed for dipping in various sauces.
Dan: "Subway continues their footlong arsenal. They debuted their new snack called Dippers, which are basically savory roll-ups."
[08:51]
Ralphie comments on the appeal of these new snacks, while John humorously reacts to the joy they bring to customers.
Ralphie: "A charcuterie without that meat. Give me some cheese."
[09:30]
John Holmberg: "Look at your face. There is joy flying off of you."
[09:16]
The discussion highlights the hosts' lighthearted take on fast food innovations and consumer reactions.
[13:09 - 15:03]
In the science segment, Dan shares exciting developments from Japan, where researchers have successfully integrated human skin cells with robotic exoskeletons.
Dan: "Scientists in Japan came up with a way to wrap a robot in living human skin cells grown in a lab."
[13:09]
John expresses unease over the implications of creating lifelike robots, drawing parallels to science fiction scenarios like Blade Runner.
John Holmberg: "If AI starts walking around with us, that's the scarier part. It's not so much that they can build something that looks like a person... They'll adapt."
[13:21] - [14:38]
The conversation delves into the ethical and practical concerns of advanced robotics, emphasizing the hosts' apprehensions about the future coexistence of humans and humanoid robots.
[12:50 - 20:18]
Dan presents a series of quick science news updates:
Alien Detection via Warp Drive Activity:
Scientists are exploring the possibility of identifying extraterrestrial life by detecting gravitational waves associated with warp drive technologies.
Dan: "We might be able to find aliens by looking for traces of warp drive activity in outer space."
[12:50]
Genetically Modified Pigs for Organ Transplants:
A breakthrough in creating pigs genetically modified to provide organs for human transplants, addressing organ shortage issues.
Dan: "Genetically modified pigs created for organ transplant research."
[24:30]
Hologram Technology in Texas Hospitals:
Texas hospitals are pioneering the use of hologram technology for doctor visits, offering a 3D Zoom-like experience.
Dan: "A hospital in Texas is the first in the US to start using hologram technology for doctor visits."
[19:17]
Happiest Industries Report:
A study ranks construction, accounting, and manufacturing among the happiest industries, while retail and hospitality lag behind.
Dan: "The happiest gig... construction. Accounting and taxes is second, followed by manufacturing, tech, and healthcare."
[20:03]
These updates provide the audience with a snapshot of current scientific advancements and societal trends, delivered with the hosts' characteristic humor and commentary.
[24:12 - 27:49]
The topic shifts to a peculiar health issue: an allergy to red meat triggered by bites from the Lone Star tick.
Dan: "Some people develop a weird and terrifying allergy to red meat after a bite from a Lone Star tick."
[24:12]
John humorously navigates the complex explanation, highlighting the confusion and misinformation surrounding the topic.
John Holmberg: "I don't even know what a Lone Star tick is. Is that a tick from the restaurant?"
[25:16]
E adds clarity, explaining that genetically modified pigs can provide safe meat alternatives for those affected.
E: "You can still eat pork... genetically modified pigs created for organ transplant research."
[25:17]
The segment combines informative content with the hosts' playful banter, making a complex medical topic accessible and entertaining.
[19:05 - 24:03]
John shares a heartfelt story about his father, revealing the emotional toll of a high-stress career in construction.
John Holmberg: "My dad was wound so tight... the happiest, nicest person you could ever run across."
[21:44]
The discussion touches on parental relationships, mental health, and the impact of a demanding job on personal well-being. E and Dan contribute by empathizing and sharing their perspectives, adding depth to the conversation.
E: "John, the reason your dad was so angry all the time is because construction is full of degenerates on the lower level."
[23:05]
This segment provides a poignant contrast to the earlier humorous topics, showcasing the hosts' ability to navigate both lighthearted and serious discussions.
[15:03 - 16:55]
An informative break sponsored by MMP Guns.com, highlighting their extensive range of firearms, ammunition, and accessories.
Byron: "MMP Guns.com has over 400,000 products for sale daily... We ship all over the country."
[15:21]
John endorses the platform, emphasizing its reliability and the immediacy of orders.
John Holmberg: "Sounds simple. That's why I always go to MMP Guns.com."
[15:35]
This segment seamlessly integrates a promotional message without disrupting the flow of the episode.
[27:49 - 30:10]
As the episode nears its end, the hosts engage in lighthearted banter about personal stories and upcoming events, maintaining their signature humor.
John Holmberg: "Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. It's out of control now. 98 KUPD."
[28:57]
Brady and Hyundai advertisements conclude the episode, ensuring listeners are informed about relevant services and promotions.
Conclusion
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully balances humor, personal stories, and informative segments. From dissecting everyday social interactions to exploring bizarre news stories and scientific breakthroughs, the hosts offer diverse content that both entertains and engages the audience. Notable moments include the heartfelt reflections on parental relationships and the humorous takes on unconventional news, exemplifying the show's ability to blend depth with levity. Whether discussing the hilarity of the wiener mobile crash or the serious implications of advanced robotics, Holmberg's Morning Sickness delivers a well-rounded and captivating listening experience.
Notable Quotes:
Dan: "Every time people are talking about on social media what their response is, not too bad, can't complain."
[02:11]
John Holmberg: "Nobody ever says terrible. You want to talk about it? Which is what they're saying this day and age we should be."
[03:05]
Ralphie: "A charcuterie without that meat. Give me some cheese."
[08:20]
John Holmberg: "That is the least accurate report ever."
[08:42]
E: "I always respond with, 'Well, I'm sucking air and not so I'm winning.'"
[03:50]
John Holmberg: "If AI starts walking around with us, that's the scarier part."
[13:21]
Dan: "Scientists in Japan came up with a way to wrap a robot in living human skin cells grown in a lab."
[13:09]
These quotes encapsulate the blend of humor, skepticism, and insightful commentary that defines the episode.