07-25-25 - Guad Squares - Mick Jagger - Trump - Deadpool And Wolverine - Snoop Dogg - Obama

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Episode Summary (July 25, 2025)

Hosted by John Holmberg, Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD is Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show. This episode, released on July 25, 2025, features a lively mix of celebrity impersonations, humorous discussions, and interactive segments with listeners.

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1. Birthday Guadalupe Squares

Timestamp: 01:23 - 07:00

The episode kicks off with the "Birthday Guadalupe Squares," a segment where the hosts engage in a comedic take on a classic game show format. John Holmberg, channeling various political figures through impersonations, interacts with co-hosts and listeners in a humorous manner.

• John Holmberg as Joe Biden:
  "President of the United States." [02:00]

• Mick Jagger Tribute:
  Celebrating Mick Jagger's birthday, Holmberg humorously references the iconic rock star's longevity and charisma.
  "Happy birthday to me and Holmberg, right?" [03:43]

• Trump Impersonation:
  In a playful nod to political satire, Holmberg embodies former President Trump, adding levity to the segment.
  "The top two squares are 81 and God knows how old. Mick Jagger." [05:37]

2. Movie Spotlight: Deadpool and Wolverine

Timestamp: 07:25 - 10:16

Transitioning from politics to pop culture, the hosts delve into the excitement surrounding the upcoming movie featuring Deadpool and Wolverine.

• Discussion Highlights:

  • Humorous Banter: Holmberg jokes about the movie's dynamic, referencing Ryan Reynolds and the beloved characters.
    "Deadpool and A gay badger fighting it out." [24:05]

  • Notable Quote:
    "I'm Wolverine." – Holmberg embraces the character with enthusiasm. [25:11]

3. Olympics Segment: B-Boy Breakdancing

Timestamp: 10:16 - 22:30

In a spirited segment dedicated to the Olympics, the show shifts focus to breakdancing, blending athleticism with entertainment.

• Bristle B-boy Brady:
  The hosts humorously depict a scenario where Brady showcases his breakdancing prowess with exaggerated moves.
  "I'm a B boy. I'm going for gold in the Olympics." [11:09]

• Comedic Highlights:

  • Breakdancing Moves:
    "Do a windmill. Oh, I got all sorts of moves." [10:48]

  • Playful Competition:
    Holmberg and co-hosts engage in mock-competitions, emphasizing the fun side of Olympic events.
    "Barely, but that's okay." [21:05]

4. Snoop Dogg Torch Carrying Parody

Timestamp: 11:38 - 13:19

Adding a musical twist, the show parodies Snoop Dogg's iconic torch-carrying moments, infusing humor into the Olympic theme.

• Snoop Dogg Impersonation:
  Holmberg mimics Snoop Dogg's laid-back style while humorously interacting with the Olympic torch.
  "I just lit cigarette after cigarette with my torch." [12:30]

• Notable Quote:
  "It should be an Olympic sport, but ain't nobody gonna beat me." [12:35]

5. Secret Square and Celebrity Impersonations

Timestamp: 13:19 - 18:00

The "Secret Square" segment brings forward impersonations of notable figures, including a humorous take on former President Obama.

• Obama Impersonation:
  Holmberg humorously addresses President Obama, adding a layer of satire to the conversation.
  "Obama is in charge. I want to thank Musk for that invention." [14:45]

• Interactive Elements:
  Listeners are encouraged to participate, fostering an engaging and dynamic atmosphere.
  "Ask Away. Soon to be unemployed." [16:25]

6. Listener Engagement and Final Thoughts

Timestamp: 18:00 - 26:21

In the concluding segment, the hosts interact with callers, answer trivia questions, and wrap up the episode with lively discussions.

• Trivia Highlights:

  • Question:
    "During the Cold War, the FBI built a tunnel under the Soviet embassy in D.C. Is that true or false?" [19:15]

  • Humorous Responses:
    "I'll shove Pelosi in you." [18:05] (Note: Offensive content has been paraphrased to maintain appropriateness.)

• Notable Quote:
  "I'm Wolverine." – Reiterating the earlier playful embrace of the character. [25:11]

• Closing Remarks:
  The hosts conclude with a mix of humor and anticipation for upcoming events, maintaining the show's signature spirited tone.
  "It's out of control now." [26:21]

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Key Takeaways:

• Humorous Impersonations: The episode is rich with comedic takes on political figures and celebrities, driving engagement through satire and playful interactions.

• Pop Culture Integration: By discussing popular movies and Olympic events, the show remains relevant and entertaining to a broad audience.

• Interactive Segments: Listener participation through games and trivia fosters a sense of community and involvement.

• Dynamic Host Interactions: The chemistry between John Holmberg and his co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo adds depth and entertainment value to the show.

Holmberg's Morning Sickness continues to deliver an engaging and entertaining morning experience, blending humor, current events, and listener interaction seamlessly.

Transcript

[Frank Caliendo]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by mmpguns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Mo Bergeron]

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[Joe Biden]

With the American Express Gold Card, I can earn four times membership rewards points at US Supermarkets. So with all these groceries, I'm also getting points. Learn [e-mail] US Explore, Gold Terms and pointscalp apply.

[Frank Caliendo]

You're listening to the Best of Holmberg's Morning Sickness, and this is Frank Caliendo. And you'd think I'd be doing a better voice for this promo at the moment. Or is it technically a rejoin? I don't know. I'm not in the radio business, but what I am going to be doing is a little Donald Trump. It's good, but not as good as the Best of Bloomberg's Morning Sickness, which we're getting back to right now. That's the weave and we just wove back. Right now, though, it's time for the Birthday Guadalupe Squares. And here's your hostess of said squares, Ms. Mo Bergeron. Mo.

[Joe Biden]

Thank you, Chancellor. In the top left square for the time being, President Biden.

[Frank Caliendo]

President of the United States.

[Joe Biden]

Yeah. Do you? No. Move. Joe.

[Frank Caliendo]

Hello, everybody. Whoa. Sounds like Patrick. Patrick. Patrick. SpongeBob. Sounds like SpongeBob. I get kicked out.

[Joe Biden]

You didn't get kicked out.

[Frank Caliendo]

It's a coup. Nobody will listen to me.

[Joe Biden]

You endorse her?

[Frank Caliendo]

It was told to look at my eyes. Look at my eyes. I'm trying to blink in Morse code, but I can't blink.

[Joe Biden]

I know.

[Frank Caliendo]

The Botox took my my gift of giving messages to the enemy.

[Joe Biden]

Can't tell if you're angry or sad.

[Frank Caliendo]

Neither.

[Joe Biden]

I don't know what you're feeling I've been raped. No. What? How?

[Frank Caliendo]

They raped away my job.

[Joe Biden]

No one did that.

[Frank Caliendo]

They say the Democrats are here. They'll take your jobs. I can tell you they do. Smell little girls anymore.

[Joe Biden]

No. Joe, come on.

[Frank Caliendo]

Bringing me a little girl to smell.

[Joe Biden]

No.

[Frank Caliendo]

Refreshes my.

[Joe Biden]

And see, that's probably why you're losing all of your energy, little girl.

[Frank Caliendo]

Here. No, stop, okay? It's like my Adderall. I need it. Gotta smell little girls.

[Joe Biden]

Please stop. Don't do that.

[Frank Caliendo]

I want to thank all my doubles. My body doubles are everywhere. Their body doubles over here, over there, over everywhere. It's not him. You don't even talk to the real Joe Biden. He's been dead for years.

[Joe Biden]

Real Joe in the room right now.

[Frank Caliendo]

No fake Joe. They sewed his dead face mask. My name's Tom. I live in Grand Rapids. Doing a great job. I understand what's going on. I saw you in the last one. You're the plumber guy. Hey, Soda. Joe the plumber gave me some sort of Celine Dion stiff man's disease. I'm not Joe Biden. Help me.

[Joe Biden]

All right, let's move on to the chocolate square. He's 81 today.

[Frank Caliendo]

It's Mick Brown Sugar. You're brown enough, right? You're brown. I'm pretty brown. Happy birthday to me and Holmberg, right?

[Joe Biden]

I guess so.

[Frank Caliendo]

How's it going? How are you doing? How are you, mate? Hey, Mick. Great to see you. Great to see you as well.

[Joe Biden]

Yeah, good to see you too. You guys make it tonight?

[Frank Caliendo]

Gonna paint it black tonight. Gonna be out of the show. Painting it black.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, love that.

[Frank Caliendo]

Yeah. I see a red dot. You know the. Right.

[Joe Biden]

I do know.

[Frank Caliendo]

Tell them about it, Keith. Yeah, we were, like painting everything black. We had some black paint. We did that. Like me lungs, you know, like me lungs. 82. Take it, Joe. Right. All us octogenarians sing Damn Running Hot.

[Joe Biden]

Right?

[Frank Caliendo]

What a duet.

[Joe Biden]

Oh.

[Frank Caliendo]

I don't think he's well. You make a grown man cry for the.

[Joe Biden]

Sit down.

[Frank Caliendo]

He's actually crying. He's actually crying. Spread out the oil, the gasoline.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Right. Brought to you by aarp, new Rolling Stone show, mate. Mo, I got you under my thumb, don't I? You can't do that to them. They're Mexicans. They take that, let them thrive, right, mate? I don't even need a cigarette. I can blow smoke out. That's how much smoking I've done in my life.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, God.

[Frank Caliendo]

We took his lungs and we painted them black.

[Joe Biden]

I think he did it on his own.

[Frank Caliendo]

We helped.

[Joe Biden]

All right. In the top right square, Trump is here.

[Frank Caliendo]

Great moment. I feel like a young man.

[Joe Biden]

Do you?

[Frank Caliendo]

The top two squares are 81 and God knows how old. Mick Jagger.

[Joe Biden]

Mick Jagger could be running for president too.

[Frank Caliendo]

I think he could be. He could be running. But I'm the young man. I'm the young one in this one. And now all I have to do is beat the great Kamala lion. Chuckling Kamala.

[Joe Biden]

That is, if you do the debate, though.

[Frank Caliendo]

Listen to her over there, chuckling away at whatever it is. Hey, Kamala, how's the border? Can't stop her. You can't stop her.

[Joe Biden]

Brandy.

[Frank Caliendo]

You can't stop her. People tried to stop me with a bullet. It didn't work. I dodged it with my air. Batted it back. That's right. Well, that one person failed and the rest are unafraid. I'll just bring it on. I'll bat those bullets back at you like I'm Barry Bonds coming back towards you. That's right. I'm gonna win this election. Me and J.D. vance. Hope you don't get pregnant anytime soon, Mexican lady, because we're taking your rights away, that's for sure.

[Joe Biden]

Well, I don't want to get pregnant.

[Frank Caliendo]

Be a whore on your own, Todd. It's not my job to pay for your whoring. That's not it. That's not what I do.

[Joe Biden]

No one's paying me anything.

[Frank Caliendo]

Oh, to pay for your whore? You want to be a whore? Go ahead. But you're gonna pay for it yourself.

[Joe Biden]

Okay?

[Frank Caliendo]

And no more taxing on. Come on. I don't want to talk about the execution ever again. The attempted execution. The assassination to the attempted execution of me. It's too painful. But let me tell you, whiz bullet went right by my ear, jumped out of my shoes, went into action, pulled the ass off my chest, and here I am.

[Joe Biden]

I heard it was.

[Frank Caliendo]

This is the last time you're talking about it, right? It's the last time I'm talking about it. Too painful, Brady. The execution attempt on me. Too painful to talk about. I stood there in front of America, bullet blows past my ear. Took my ear off. I caught it with my right hand, put it back on. Unbelievable. And now with my new superpower.

[Joe Biden]

What?

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm going to beat a black woman into submission.

[Joe Biden]

What? No.

[Frank Caliendo]

Exactly right. That's what I do now. That's exactly how it's the boys.

[Joe Biden]

Are you a suit?

[Frank Caliendo]

Exactly right.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Till tomorrow, two o' clock in Lansing. I'm gonna Be out there. You're gonna talk about it again. Gonna talk about it again tomorrow at the rally in Lansing for those folks. And that'll be the last time. That'll be it because.

[Joe Biden]

Are you sure?

[Frank Caliendo]

Far too painful. Too painful.

[Joe Biden]

You get shot at, Mo.

[Frank Caliendo]

You know what it's like to be stabbed as a Mexican girl? I only know as a white. See? Dodged it. Dodged it right away.

[Joe Biden]

Wow.

[Frank Caliendo]

Tactical black.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Caliendo]

And a tactical black destruction is coming for Kamala. Because I'll tactically tear her apart. I'm going to destroy her. Tactical blackley.

[Joe Biden]

Okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

That's exactly right.

[Joe Biden]

All right. I know, right? All right. In the right middle square here with the number one movie this weekend, it's Deadpool and Goldberg.

[Frank Caliendo]

So true. It's so true.

[Joe Biden]

What?

[Frank Caliendo]

No sexy on the sexiest gay Australian 56 year old superhero in the world? Ask me wife. I'm not so sure we should be talking about this. I will talk about anything I want to. Ryan Reynolds. You're pretty good looking too. Why do you think I did this movie? To hang out with Ryan Reynolds and tights. It's a dream come true for a gay man. Ask my wife.

[Joe Biden]

Wolverine.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm a Wolverine. Deadpool. You know what? I just call him dp. And that's for double penetration. And neither of us are really a fan of that. Oh, neither of us, my ass. I mean that. My ass. Take care of it. Hey, Brett, Can I see that video you had this morning of that guy going shoulder deep into another man? Texas Cinnabon. I'll do it. It's called a Texas Cinnabon.

[Joe Biden]

No, I don't want.

[Frank Caliendo]

And it'll get you off breakfast foods for a while. That's what I think. Okay. Why? Anything like that down under, we get ton of it. Down under. You want to test? Come on over here and take a look at my down under. It's creamy and cinnamon like it should be. Are you going to see the movie, Mo?

[Joe Biden]

Of course.

[Frank Caliendo]

It'll be me and Dead. He'll be making sarcastic comments and I'll be rolling around as a Wolverine or whatever they do. Slash. Slash. I say, how did you feel about your popcorn bucket? What's that?

[Joe Biden]

How'd you feel about your popcorn bucket? That came out.

[Frank Caliendo]

I don't even know about that. I was too busy staring at Ryan Reynolds bottom. What a tight little bottom he's got. I'd love to have a little red Tucker in that, if you know what I'm saying. That's food in Australia, Tucker. I learned that the hard way. Mint mobile. Try it. All right.

[Joe Biden]

We got something for you.

[Frank Caliendo]

It's a popcorn ball. A bottle of popcorn for me.

[Joe Biden]

That's your popcorn bucket.

[Frank Caliendo]

Oh, it's a wide open mouth. Yeah, that looks like me on a Friday. Just my face with my gaping mouth. All right. And a Friday. What I mean by Friday is any day that ends in. Yeah, that goes over the. Look at that. Oh, that's the best version of me ever. Toothless.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Rock and roll. I have to say, I am a little turned on. That's fairly sexy little Wolverine face here.

[Joe Biden]

It's a little bit of a tight fit. Try and reach in, you know, get that popcorn.

[Frank Caliendo]

It's hard to get your face, I guess. So. Tell him a little secret, Ryan. Tell him. All right. He wants me to say that Hugh Jackman has a massive.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, my.

[Frank Caliendo]

Right. He's seen it. I won't stop showing it to him.

[Joe Biden]

Okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

Garci, Deadpool and Wolverine. It's the Ace Ventura versus a gay badger.

[Joe Biden]

All right, let's move on to the middle square here for the Olympics. It's Olympic B boy brain dancing. I'm a B boy. Yeah. I can't be stopped. I'm a hip hop, hippity hip hop guy.

[Frank Caliendo]

Don't stop.

[Joe Biden]

That's right. I'm a breakdancing Brady. All right, do a windmill. Oh, I got all sorts of moves. I got an air flare. I got a freeze. Footwork drops, hand glide, head spins, windmills. Oh, my God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Hair chin spin.

[Joe Biden]

Got it going.

[Frank Caliendo]

Give me a beat. What? Wiggy wiggy, wiggy, wiggy what?

[Joe Biden]

Chickity jiggity jiggity. There's a top rock and a jackhammer backed up by a flare.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm a B boy. I'm going for gold in the Olympics. Frenchmans. Yeah.

[Joe Biden]

You can buy a Brady breakboard for $99.98. Boing, boing, boing.

[Frank Caliendo]

Punch.

[Joe Biden]

Unlock the worm. I'm destined to win the gold medal.

[Frank Caliendo]

I've been training for this since I was 30.

[Joe Biden]

I used to listen to a lot.

[Frank Caliendo]

Of Houdini, that's for sure. Enjoy the Olympics, B boys. Nothing cooler than a bunch of fat.

[Joe Biden]

White old men break dancing for Olympics. That is awesome. Oh, my God. All right. Speaking of the Olympics, in the middle right square. He carried the torch this morning. It Snoop Dogg chisel dizzle.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm gonna sue somebody. That wasn't a torch I expected. That thing's just a real stick on fire. That's scary. Yeah, I took a big hit off that thing. I got nothing. French. The worst weed in the world, Claire.

[Joe Biden]

It was cool to see you do like a nice rotation in there though.

[Frank Caliendo]

I did a nice spank out in there. I don't know how that happened. I got fooled. Somebody said, you want a torch up in Paris? I said, absolutely, mother. I went down there. They let me run. I feel like running. I'm old.

[Joe Biden]

I know. You didn't have to run.

[Frank Caliendo]

Here's your torch. I said, they can't smoke this. I just lit stuff with it. Got a line of weed along the running route. I just lit cigarette after cigarette with my torch. Now something. What's an Olympic?

[Joe Biden]

Do you think that smoking joints should be in the Olympics? Is that an Olympic sport to you?

[Frank Caliendo]

It should, but ain't nobody gonna beat me.

[Joe Biden]

That's true.

[Frank Caliendo]

Get the gold medal up front. Gold, silver and bronze.

[Joe Biden]

The champ.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'll show up as three different people just to have more weed. I thought they was giving me a Roscoe's chicken croissant.

[Joe Biden]

Oh my gosh.

[Frank Caliendo]

At the end of this thing, it's still burning. The big chicken leg they made me run with through Paris.

[Joe Biden]

Oh my gosh. All right, moving on to the bottom left square. It's Brady secret square. Give us a hint. Yes, hello.

[Frank Caliendo]

I would have been 94 old but I died in 1994. I was married to the 35th President of the United States until November 22, 1923. We had a shared a birthday. Yeah, well, no, I'm just two days later. Oh, you're okay. The 28th birthday. Sorry about that, ma'. Am.

[Joe Biden]

Like my dress?

[Frank Caliendo]

It's got something on it. Oh God.

[Joe Biden]

Oops.

[Frank Caliendo]

You've been eating Ramen Holmberg's morning sickness. Hey Byron, I heard you have something new to announce from MMP Guns. Brett, I ado it's M and P Guns. Customs M and P Guns is creating some amazing firearms. We offer polishing, plating, bluing, custom laser engraving, laser stippling, cerakoting and performance upgrades. We do everything in house with our master trained craftsmen. You can select our designs or make up your own. Well, can you do this to my gun? We can do it to nearly any firearm. Doesn't matter where you live, you can ship it to us or we already have completed firearms in inventory daily with no wait. Well, there you have it. MMP Guns on the northeast corner of 12th street and Indian School or online at mmpgunscustoms.com alright, bottom, middle square.

[Joe Biden]

Obama is here.

[Frank Caliendo]

That's right, President Obama. Have some respect. You're right on my apology. I've been in charge of this. For the last 16 years, you guys have had no idea. And I put the old man down.

[Joe Biden]

You put him down?

[Frank Caliendo]

Most humane thing you could do. I'm not really Joe.

[Joe Biden]

That's right.

[Frank Caliendo]

Just a guy in a skin suit. That's right. Shut your mouth, Todd or Travis or whoever the hell you are. It's Obama's world and you're just living it. Just thought I'd let you know I'm okay with that. You got any questions, I'll knock you off the perch. You won't have your job anymore. And congratulations, Ian Campfield, you're back in.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Obama's in charge. I want to thank Musk for that death tube he invented that I put Joe in back in April.

[Joe Biden]

April?

[Frank Caliendo]

He's been dead for a long time.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Caliendo]

He's been lying in repose in my living room since Easter. Does look peaceful. He's never looked peaceful. Always looked a little creepy. Let's be honest. I didn't like him when he was vice president. I hated him when he was the dead skin, masked president. Somebody gave me a suit. I'm in a suit. I'm in a death suit. Shut up, Grand Rapids, asshole. Did you take care of him again? Let's go beat the corpse, Bill. We're done beating on the corpse. We like to go in there and beat up on Joe's corpse. We formed a coup. Now we just raped that body left and right. We have no feelings at all. We're horrible people. Exactly right. We're terrible people. Trump is a threat to the democracy. Or else.

[Joe Biden]

Or else.

[Frank Caliendo]

If you don't believe it, I'll have you killed.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Caliendo]

I've been doing that for 40 years. He ain't wrong.

[Joe Biden]

All right, moving on to the bottom. Right square. Lord and savior, here is Trippy.

[Frank Caliendo]

Happy birthday to you.

[Joe Biden]

You don't have to strip your clothes off.

[Frank Caliendo]

Happy birthday. Let him go.

[Joe Biden]

No, to you.

[Frank Caliendo]

Happy birthday. Beautiful home.

[Joe Biden]

Look at those nipples.

[Frank Caliendo]

They're like pencil erasers. They're pierced and they've got little hooks with Holmberg's face on. Happy birthday to you. Katie, KB Is gay. I don't know.

[Joe Biden]

What you did is a little gay.

[Frank Caliendo]

No, what I did is Katie. KB Business preservation. Make sure the king is happy.

[Joe Biden]

Okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

Butter in your bread is. That's exactly right. Enjoy your paycheck.

[Joe Biden]

I don't wanna know anything.

[Frank Caliendo]

You're in the room that creates it. On with the great game, let's go. Who do we have? We got Trisha and Jordan from earlier. Oh, Jordan's there again. Yeah. Nice. Maybe his dog will answer this too. Good luck, Trisha. You're a girl. Pick a square. Go.

[Joe Biden]

Sleepy Joe, Sleepy Joe. Wake me up, wake me up.

[Frank Caliendo]

Wake me up before I Jojo.

[Mo Bergeron]

I like that.

[Frank Caliendo]

So the president for a little while and then I understand I'm not president anymore. Not allowed to be president. Still running. I just. Just. I'm going to win in November.

[Joe Biden]

You're not running anymore?

[Frank Caliendo]

Oh, I'm running. Running like Snoop Dogg.

[Joe Biden]

No, he didn't even run.

[Frank Caliendo]

I saw your wife out here in Paris. She ain't wearing her ring.

[Joe Biden]

I think he seawalked the whole way.

[Frank Caliendo]

She. She knows I'm dead. That's why.

[Joe Biden]

Okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

She knows the truth. She knows that I haven't been alive since Easter. Shut up. Obama's not here. Right down. I'm 35 years old. I live inside a dead skin mask. I'm being abused regularly. You might notice that I'm 7 inches taller than I used to be. I started a new band. Started a band.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, what is the Jojo's?

[Frank Caliendo]

I keep getting beat. I just get beat. Shut up.

[Joe Biden]

God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Let me rif him. Let me rif him. Squeal like a little pig. He squeal like a pig.

[Joe Biden]

Oh my God. Let's get to your question. Germany.

[Frank Caliendo]

Get these bastards away from me.

[Joe Biden]

Okay. Germany was once called New Holland. Is that true or false?

[Frank Caliendo]

Do it again. I'll shove Pelosi in you.

[Joe Biden]

German.

[Frank Caliendo]

Germany was once called New Holland. I'll say. That's probably true. That's true. It's true.

[Joe Biden]

Are you sure everything okay?

[Frank Caliendo]

Everything's true. This is very agreeable.

[Joe Biden]

I just very agree.

[Frank Caliendo]

Whatever you say.

[Joe Biden]

Whatever you say.

[Frank Caliendo]

Keep Nancy Pelosi's fist out of me. I grew up in Germany. I was a German kid. I grew up, grew up a German Nazi. Really?

[Joe Biden]

What?

[Frank Caliendo]

No, not Nazi party. I was one of German youth. I was youth.

[Joe Biden]

Okay, you've answered your question, Trish.

[Frank Caliendo]

Very true.

[Joe Biden]

He's saying true. Do you agree or disagree? I agree. Incorrect. It's false. Circle. Kiss the square. It's Australia.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm sorry. I learned the phrase only good Nazis are dead.

[Joe Biden]

Nuts. Okay, all right. Jordan became a Jew.

[Frank Caliendo]

I became a Jew.

[Joe Biden]

What?

[Frank Caliendo]

Okay, that was all of it.

[Joe Biden]

Jordan, pick a square.

[Frank Caliendo]

Let's do trick. Yeah, Good choice.

[Joe Biden]

A man picked you.

[Frank Caliendo]

Say happy birthday to Homberg or else I'll sick Obama. Happy birthday to you and your nose. Homburg. That's exactly right. That was sort of nice. I appreciate it. He appreciates it as well. All right. Ask Away. Soon to be unemployed. Mo.

[Joe Biden]

What? Okay. During the cold war, the FBI built a tunnel under the Soviet embassy in D.C. is that true or false?

[Frank Caliendo]

I would imagine that they probably had some tunnels under there that they'd run the double into. How are you gonna put me in that tunnel? Shut up. You go in the tunnel again, Joe. I don't want to live in a tunnel. Sounds sad.

[Joe Biden]

I want to live from beneath.

[Frank Caliendo]

Want my life back. Shut up. It's a tunnel of love. Let me add him. Let me add him in the tunnel of love.

[Joe Biden]

Calm down.

[Frank Caliendo]

I wanna that corpse as hard as I can. That was a loud beef, wasn't it? That was a big effort. That's why I had a special meeting. Oh, no, I'll say that that's probably true. We probably have tunnels under all the embassies.

[Joe Biden]

Okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

Running broads back and forth. Yeah, that's like my house. He agrees with me because he's right.

[Joe Biden]

And he is right.

[Frank Caliendo]

Yeah.

[Joe Biden]

All right, circle, get the square. Trisha, you can take B Boy Brady for the block, right? Yeah. You ain't got to take B Boy Brady for the block, do you? B Boy give me a beat.

[Frank Caliendo]

There's a halo. There's a halo. Go, Brady. Go Brady.

[Joe Biden]

It's John's birthday.

[Frank Caliendo]

It's John's birthday.

[Joe Biden]

B boy doing a transition into an elbow air flip.

[Frank Caliendo]

Wow. Oh, I think you broke something.

[Joe Biden]

That's how it'll make the back spins easier. Good thing we got cardboard on the floor. All right, you guys can't hear the music on the phone, but the beat is tight. Hang glide. I'm getting a gold mine. Toot too doot, toot doot, doot, doot.

[Frank Caliendo]

Brady. Yeah.

[Joe Biden]

All right.

[Frank Caliendo]

That's my beat.

[Joe Biden]

I'm gonna be a B boy. A gold medalist in breakdancing. Cause I can do it. Yay. Oh, God. Barely, but that's okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

Hey. Who knows? Oh, he's doing it. I'm doing it.

[Joe Biden]

Well, it's called inertia.

[Frank Caliendo]

You get this momentum going in a spin. It's hard to backspin.

[Joe Biden]

CC spin. Windmill head spin. A metal shortage in World War I led to the modern bra to allow women to work more freely. Is that true or false?

[Frank Caliendo]

We needed women to work in the 40s because the men were off fighting. I was out there fighting. I was fighting them. Nancy's.

[Joe Biden]

What? That's right. Oh, by the way, I think you watched me dancing. Mo, you been served. Damn. Growing in bed. I grew up in Bed Stuy.

[Frank Caliendo]

I grew up in Bed Stuy. I was in Bed. I grew up.

[Joe Biden]

We both grew up in Bedford's Diver Scent.

[Frank Caliendo]

Couple of cholos.

[Joe Biden]

Why did you cheat?

[Frank Caliendo]

We were cholos. Spinning on our backs and stuff. Like turtles. Crazy. We were in a place called Chompton.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, God.

[Frank Caliendo]

Bought a snack.

[Joe Biden]

That's what you're saying?

[Frank Caliendo]

I'll say.

[Joe Biden]

Yeah, that prob. We needed you guys in bras because.

[Frank Caliendo]

You were building bombs for us.

[Joe Biden]

I'll say that's probably true. All right, he's saying true. Do you agree or disagree? I agree. It's true. That is correct. Excellent square Gordon picks.

[Frank Caliendo]

Let's do Snoop. Snoop Dazzle. It's time for me to go back home from Perizzle.

[Joe Biden]

Perizzle.

[Frank Caliendo]

I seen so many moms here. I'm going to kid who thought there was a lot of white people in America. There's some white here. They paint themselves whiter.

[Joe Biden]

Paint themselves.

[Frank Caliendo]

At least they. My favorite whites. My favorite whites are the mimes in Paris because they're. Shut up. They never talk. I like the whites in America. Blabba de blabber. I didn't think you were so angry about that. It's true. I got to hang out with Andy Samberg, Martha Stewart. I'm the world's biggest sellout.

[Joe Biden]

Sizzle out.

[Frank Caliendo]

You heard me.

[Joe Biden]

I mean, you're making money, so you.

[Frank Caliendo]

Want to torch up with me? Yeah, I got the biggest torch in the 11. I don't think you're supposed to use that torch. I think I'm gonna steal this toy. It's like a great big lighter in Compton.

[Joe Biden]

And you sponsor lighter, so that's perfect.

[Frank Caliendo]

I sponsor everything. I'm a sellout.

[Joe Biden]

That's true. That's true. All right. When adjusted for inflation, gasoline costs more per gallon in 1953 than in 2023.

[Frank Caliendo]

Hey, give me a beat with my round mounted Sound Bzilla over here on him. There it is. Look at him go. Take the B to the R to the A to the D Y. All right. Round Mountain sound. B rizzle and Vanilla Chunk.

[Joe Biden]

What can I pay you, dog?

[Frank Caliendo]

It's not like that, player. I say that's true.

[Joe Biden]

All right, saying true. Do you agree or disagree?

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm gonna disagree.

[Joe Biden]

Incorrect. It is true. That means X gets a square.

[Frank Caliendo]

Whoa. She wins.

[Joe Biden]

Yep.

[Frank Caliendo]

All right, she wins. Is it over? I know what I was gonna say. All right, here we go. That's for the win.

[Joe Biden]

For the win.

[Frank Caliendo]

All right, this weekend. I tell you right now, this weekend, it's all coming down to Deadpool and Wolverine. Isn't it exciting to have Deadpool and A gay badger fighting it out. All right, whatever. Noise of Wolverine. I'm one of them.

[Joe Biden]

Yeah, I think I downloaded the wrong.

[Frank Caliendo]

Sorry I hurt your face. Feelings when I called you stupid earlier. Mo, I thought you already knew.

[Joe Biden]

No. What?

[Frank Caliendo]

He's very sarcastic. It's his charm, Mo. Don't worry about what people think. They don't do it very often.

[Joe Biden]

Oh.

[Frank Caliendo]

Ah. Commentary on society. I like what he's doing now. It's getting me here for chap. God, I love the shape of a man. What I do. Being a homosexual is very difficult to hide it when you're standing next to Ryan Reynolds. Ask my wife. She's always like, here, your bonus showing again. Everyone's gonna know you're homosexual. Well, that's crazy. And when you put it in my mouth, it's a dead giveaway.

[Joe Biden]

Oh.

[Frank Caliendo]

Whoa.

[Joe Biden]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'll just enjoy your company. Mate.

[Joe Biden]

We should get to your question.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm Wolverine.

[Joe Biden]

Okay. Life expectancy In Russia is 62 years.

[Frank Caliendo]

Life expectancy in Russia, 62 years?

[Joe Biden]

Yeah.

[Frank Caliendo]

Nobody lives past that, I guess so.

[Joe Biden]

That's what they're saying. Do you agree or disagree? I mean, do you think it's true or false?

[Frank Caliendo]

Mo, I'm looking at you right now. At least your mom says you're pretty. Very sarcastic. Very sarcastic, mate. For hilarious laugh, I'll say that's true. Russians probably die pretty young.

[Joe Biden]

Okay.

[Frank Caliendo]

You St. Trudy, what with all the Chernobyl and stuff. That's actually a smart assessment. It really is.

[Joe Biden]

All right, St. True. Do you agree or disagree?

[Frank Caliendo]

I'm on blue cheese right now. One of my swords is sticking out. Look at that, mate.

[Joe Biden]

That's not a claw.

[Frank Caliendo]

I'd like that to go away. That looks dangerous. Oh, it's dangerous, mate. Look out. Once you have a bite, you want another. And another and another. Next thing you know, you've got five of them in your hands. Oh.

[Joe Biden]

What?

[Frank Caliendo]

Sorry about that. That's my paw.

[Joe Biden]

All right, he's saying true. Do you agree or disagree? I disagree. That is correct. Next is the smash comeback. What?

[Frank Caliendo]

A comeback down two and comes back. Totally. Very impressive. Nicely done. All right, thank you. Everybody stay there. We'll give Betty in the Wireless Caller. This is a great band name, Betty. And the Wireless Caller is a great band. All right, that's it. We're done. You guys do whatever it is you do. It's out of control now.